《Passion Heaven》 Prologue Prologue It is 11:40pm and Shu Yawang is still in a karaoke bar singing with a group of people. Speaking of karaoke, Shu Yawang is one of the audience members; she did not sing one single song the whole night. It¡¯s not because she can¡¯t sing, it¡¯s because there are too many people hogging the microphone. The boss of the Geo Landscape Company, Chief Cheng, is holding onto the microphone as he sings ¡¶ÄãµÄÈáÇéÎÒÓÀÔ¶²»¶®¡·. As he sings towards the climax, you can see the drunken expression on his face, his shiny, bald head reflecting the many colors of lights in the dark karaoke room. Manager Lee sits by the song selection stand, choosing three songs in a row. The screen is saturated with three pages of songs, but Manager Lee places the three songs he chose to the front. Zhang Ru, an accountant sitting beside Yawang twitches the edge of her lips and rant, ¡°So detestable, he inserts his own songs to the front again.¡± Yawang swirls the alcohol in her glass cup and smiles. ¡°Leave it, let him go first.¡± ¡°No! I waited for half an hour for my song!¡± Zhang Ru goes on to add another statement, ¡°Manager Lee, didn¡¯t we agree in the beginning to not insert your own songs to the front?¡± Manager Lee turns his head back and smile smugly. ¡°One last time!¡± Unconvinced, Zhang Ru rises up from her seat and walks up to Manager Lee. She tries to insert her song to the front, but Manager Lee wouldn¡¯t let her. The two quarrel for half a day, and at the end, Manager Lee lets Zhang Ru place her two songs first after she flaunts her cute acts to him. A beautiful young woman whose twenty-two years old like Zhang Ru holds this type of advantage. In front of men, they just need to act cute and speak in a lighter and slightly high-pitched voice to obtain their goals. The men then will gladly give in to them. Shu Yawang holds up her glass cup and takes in small sips of beer, the bitterness of it prickling her numbed tastebuds. Today, the company wins the bid of the government¡¯s new project for 2009. The project is a landscape design for the city¡¯s downtown park. From accepting this project, the company won¡¯t go bankrupt even if they don¡¯t accept any more projects for the year. _______________________________________________________________ As the boss of the company, Chief Cheng is more hyped up than usual. After he finishes the last line of the song, he walks up to the middle of the dance stage with a glass of wine in his other hand. He raises the glass as he speaks to the microphone, ¡°Today, we¡¯re able to win this project due to everyone¡¯s hard work and cooperation. This project is going to be a long and difficult process and everyone will be busy and exhausted. I hope everyone can continue with a hard-working mindset and persist to the end, strive to the end! Everyone, cheers!¡± ¡°Cheers!¡± Everyone shouted, raising their glass up and intaking the alcohol in one shot. Chief Cheng happily sits his wine glass down and place the microphone to his lips again. ¡°Hey Lee, go input the song ¡¶Í¬×ÀµÄÄã¡·.¡± Manager Lee swiftly inputs the song and place it to the front. Chief Cheng starts to sing, as if he is in his own world. After his song ended, an employee comes knocking on the door, telling them their time is up. Shu Yawang sees the depressed looks on Manager Lee and Zhang Ru¡¯s face and starts to laugh. The intern who is sitting beside her, looks at Yawang in bewilderment. ¡°What?¡± Yawang asked, getting her bag as she looks at the intern, Lin Yu Chen. ¡°Nothing-, nothing.¡± Yu Chen sputters out, waving his hand quickly, shielding his shocked expression. ¡°It¡¯s just, it¡¯s my first time seeing Shu Jie laugh.¡± Shu Yawang is somewhat taken aback from his statement. He¡¯s been working with us for three months already, surely he saw me laugh before right? ¡°It can¡¯t be right? I remember laughing often.¡± ¡°No, no, it¡¯s different. It¡¯s like, cute.¡± Cute? She looks at the other women in the karaoke room, with her oversized black coat and her hair tied up in a simple ponytail with a emotionless expression on her face. She¡¯s almost twenty-eight years old, she¡¯s not young anymore, how can someone use the word cute to describe her? After a quick glance, she wears her bag over her shoulders and awkwardly smiles back. ¡°Let¡¯s go.¡± _______________________________________________________________ When everyone arrives downstairs, they all bid their goodbyes to each other, leaving with their cars or calling a taxi. Shu Yawang lifts up the collars of her coat, not in a rush to call for a taxi. She drank a lot this evening, her stomach rolling with urges to puke. She wants to take a walk, breathing in some fresh air. Even though the winter wind gives off a bone-chilling effect, there are some things that also gives off the same effect. Although T City is a bustling place, there is no sight of anyone or anything after midnight. You can see some cars driving by the streets here and there, but that¡¯s about it. She stuffs her hands in her coat pockets and continue walking, the heels of her boots making a crisp, clanking sound as she walks. ¡°Shu Jie!¡± a voice behind her calls out. Yawang stops and waits for him. He runs to her side, his youthful face displaying a radiant smile. She looks at him in a trance, invoking an untouchable memory from her brain like an invading, ferocious tsunami. She clenches her fists tightly as she grinds her teeth, waiting for the heartache to pass by. ¡°Shu Jie you¡¯re also taking this road?¡± Yu Chen asks with a shy smile. ¡°My house is nearby.¡± Yawang nods her head slightly. She wants to turn her body, but her foot didn¡¯t listen, and she starts to fall forward. Yu Chen hurriedly clutches her arm with his hand, pulling her back up with all his strength. She slams into his chest from the force, but thanks to the soft, warm coat he¡¯s wearing, it didn¡¯t hurt her one bit. His embrace feels soft, and she can smell a faint smoky scent from him, similar to her memory. After Yawang stabilize herself, she separates from him. Just at that time, a car¡¯s headlights beamed at them. She squints her eyes, looking at the man that steps out of the silver Jaguar XF. He looks at her with a familiar smile. She push Yu Chen away and steps back, raising her head to look up at him. He still looks like how he is before with his handsome facial features and a faint smile, a warm and decent-looking man, but his eyes give off a mysterious expression. ¡°Yawang-ah.¡± He calls her name. He always add an ¡°ah¡± behind her name. _______________________________________________________________ When they were married, he said, ¡°Can you give me a home? Our home.¡± When they were divorced, he said, ¡°I can¡¯t give you happiness, you also can¡¯t give me mine.¡± She clenches her fists again, being paralyzed from where she is standing. It¡¯s as if she is trapped in a warp. It¡¯s been a very long time since she last saw him. He twitches the edge of his lips and looks at Yu Chen, then he laughs. ¡°Yawang-ah, you got a new one? Did you forgot how old you are?¡± She looks at his handsome face that carries a hint of playfulness that she never saw him have before. She gives a slight nod and said, ¡°Long time no see.¡± Qu Wei Ran raises his hand and wrapped it under her chin, smirking back at her. ¡°You got really old.¡± She raised her eyebrows and pursed her lips, shrugging it off with her shoulders. ¡°Can¡¯t help it, women get old really fast.¡± Qu Wei Ran lowers his head as he asks, ¡°Xia Mu is twenty-three this year right?¡± He spreads out his hands as he measured her out with them. ¡°Still not tired of looking at your old lady face?¡± ¡°Hey, how can you say that?!¡± Yu Chen shouts out, glaring at Wei Ran with his narrowed eyebrows. Yawang inhale a deep breath, she don¡¯t want to deal with him. She turns her body to leave, but Wei Ran quickly grab her by the arm. ¡°You¡¯re mad? You¡¯re mad at me after I said a few things to you? Haha.¡± He chuckled, irritated from her response. ¡°Qu Wei Ran.¡± She calls his name. ¡°I¡¯m not the one who¡¯s mad, you are.¡± ¡°Haha, yes, I¡¯m the one who¡¯s mad. It¡¯s always been me.¡± He reply back with a glare, his smile disappeared as his eyes turn dark from the anger of betrayal. ¡°Who¡¯s the one that caused this? Who¡¯s the one that ran off with a man who¡¯s barely eighteen years old? Right now I want to know, did my curse work five years ago? You and him, you¡¯re not happy right?¡± Yawang sighs as she looks back at him. ¡°Mr. Qu, our marriage is a joke. Whoever I¡¯m with, I don¡¯t need your blessings.¡± She turns her body away from him and nods towards Yu Chen. ¡°I¡¯m leaving first.¡± She stretches her arm out to hail a taxi and tells the driver her address once she close the door. She didn¡¯t turn her head back to look at him, but she knows he is looking at her with his sharp eyes, gazing over her. Yawang leans her head against the car window, feeling exhausted. She can never think that she will meet him again in T City. She suddenly thinks that everything that had happened in past, had happened in her past life. ¡°Miss, we¡¯re here.¡± She pays him, take her receipt, grabs her bag, and opens the door to leave. _______________________________________________________________ She walks up to the second floor and opens the door, turning the living room light on along the way. She drops her bag onto the sofa and collapse on top of it. She closes her eyes as her body aches from this busy night. She is so tired that she don¡¯t want to move. Someone opens the door, but her eyes remain close, because she knows who open it. ¡°It¡¯s this late already?¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t sleep in the living room, you can catch a cold.¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t just mmm me, move it.¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± Yuan Zhu walks toward the sofa and pulls Yawang up. ¡°You always leave me with no choice!¡± Yawang opens her eyes as she laugh softly, seeing her roommate in her cotton pajamas, unruly long hair, and a pair of glasses that hide her beautiful eyes. ¡°Why are you looking at me like that? Hurry and go take a shower!¡± She gives Yawang a slight push. Yawang sits on the sofa, not moving an inch. Then she calls out her name, ¡°Zhu Zai.¡± ¡°Hmm?¡± ¡°I met my ex-husband today.¡± ¡°Huh, and then?¡± Yuan Zhu sits beside her excitedly with a nosy expression. ¡°Don¡¯t you always wanted to know why I got divorced?¡± ¡°Uh huh.¡± ¡°It¡¯s because¡­there is a person¡­¡± She stops as she thinks for the appropriate wording for it. ¡°There is a special person in my heart, someone I can never forget.¡± Tonight, she wants to tell a story; a story she can never forget, a story she can never make clear of. Chapter 1: I will wait for you in memory lane Chapter 1: I will wait for you in memory lane If you had asked: Xia Mu, who did you hate the most? He will answer with no hesitation: Shu Yawang. Yawang turned sixteen years old during the summer of her sophomore year. One afternoon, her father told her to go to his senior officer¡¯s house to be his grandson¡¯s private tutor. She was shocked from the announcement, knowing her father¡¯s senior officer being the military troop commander of S City. She had seen the commander a few times, he is a very strict and strong old man. Everytime she sees him, she will immediately straighten her back out of habit. Yawang laughs at her father. ¡°Dad, your daughter has red marks all over her report card, how can you expect me to be someone¡¯s tutor? Don¡¯t play with me.¡± Her father looks back at her. ¡°Are you proud that your report card is full of red marks? If I tell you to go, you go. If you can¡¯t handle elementary school student¡¯s work, don¡¯t take Shu as your surname.¡± Yawang looks at her father, she really wanted to tell him to not belittle elementary school student¡¯s homework nowadays, there are some math problems that she couldn¡¯t solve. ¡°Dad, I¡¯m busy. I have a lot of summer vacation homework to do.¡± Her father glance at her and straighten his back before shouting out a command. ¡°Attention!¡± Yawang immediately straightens her back . ¡°Reporting to general, Shu Yawang is in attendance!¡± ¡°Comrade Shu Yawang, you will be given a glorious but difficult mission. From today on, you will report to Commander Xia¡¯s household at eight in the morning every day. You will teach in a serious manner and bring pride to our family, carry out your mission immediately!¡± ¡°Yes General!¡± She straightens her back once more and salutes, a standard Chinese soldier posture. She turns her body and starts to march, 1, 2, 1! 1, 2, 1! When she reaches the front door, she angrily turn back. Darn you old man, always using this tactic! She¡¯s been forced to train like a soldier since she was little, and she never had felt sad about herself until now. After she¡¯s finished eating her breakfast the next morning, she walks to Commander Xia¡¯s house while humming a small tune. At first, she is unwilling to go, but she starts to give some thought into it. I¡¯m just babysitting the crowned prince, it shouldn¡¯t be difficult. The old man said he will add more money to my allowance, but of course that¡¯s not why I¡¯m willing to go, hehe. Yawang¡¯s house is located at the outermost part of the zone where the families of military officials live. Commander Xia¡¯s house is located at the back of the villa, the walking distance being around twenty minutes. _______________________________________________________________ She stands outside of the front entrance of the villa and knocks onto the door. A young man came out from behind the door, he¡¯s not really tall, but he¡¯s built and is wearing a military uniform. She looks at his shoulder stars, a row of three stars, a battalion commander. ¡°Hello Uncle, my name is Shu Yawang, my father sent me here.¡± ¡°Come in.¡± The man leads her in the villa. In the main hall, Yawang sees Commander Xia sitting on a mahogany sofa, his serious face showing a trace of warmth when he sees her. ¡°You came, Yawang.¡± ¡°Hello Grandpa Xia.¡± ¡°Little Zheng, go tell Xia Mu to come down.¡± ¡°Yes Commander.¡± The man that opened the door for her turns his body and walks up the staircase. Minutes later, there are two sets of footsteps that can be heard, one light and one heavy. She looks up to the staircase, this was the first time she met Xia Mu. Even to this day, she still remembers the moment. He held onto the ancient-looking railings as he walks down the steps, a kid around ten years old with no expression on his face, looking dull and lifeless. His eyes are like glass, so bleak with no trace of light. When he looks at you, you can sense a spooky feeling. He stops on the last flight of stairs and looks at Commander Xia. He beckoned him to come over. ¡°Xia Mu, Grandpa found a tutor for you, come say hi.¡± Xia Mu¡¯s eyes wander to her. He didn¡¯t say a word, didn¡¯t move an inch, and didn¡¯t give a smile, like an exquisite doll. Such a strange feeling. ¡°Xia Mu¡­¡± Commander Xia repeats. Yawang sense a nervous tension in the villa and tries to break it by waving her hand to him with the cheeriest smile she can make. ¡°Hi Xia Mu, my name is Shu Yawang. You can call me Yawang Jiejie.¡± Xia Mu looks at her with no expressions on his face. Yawang scratches her cheek as she looks over to Commander Xia helplessly. Commander Xia narrowed his eyebrows with an exhausted look on his face. ¡°Yawang, I¡¯ll leave Xia Mu to you, Grandpa is going to work now. Please teach him well.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± Yawang cheerfully reply. In front of others, Yawang always play the good girl role. _______________________________________________________________ After Commander Xia and Uncle Zheng leave, it¡¯s just Yawang with Xia Mu in the villa. When she turns around, Xia Mu is no where in sight. She walks up the stairs holding onto the handrail and finds him in the room at the right. He is sitting on the carpet, concentrating on assembling a military tank model. ¡°What are you playing with, Xia Mu?¡± she asks him with a relaxed tone. Xia Mu lowers his head and keeps on assembling his model. She looks at him, his eyelashes fluttering like a fan and she notices he have dark circles underneath. Wow, he has dark circles already at this age? What is he, a robber at night? ¡°Xia Mu, didn¡¯t anyone tell you that ignoring someone is disrespectful?¡± ¡°Hey! Can you talk?¡± ¡°Don¡¯t make me, I will hit you!¡± ¡°I will hit you!¡± ¡°I¡¯m really going to hit you!¡± Yawang raises her arm, then slowlys drop it back down. I will let this go because of the allowance! She smiles and tries to talk again. ¡°Xia Mu, if you talk to Jiejie, I will treat you to ice cream, okay?¡± When she said that, he look up at her, replying back with an indifferent tone. ¡°You¡¯re annoying.¡± She clenches her fists together as she looks at him. This is why I hate kids! Especially arrogant ones! The next few days Yawang will report at eight in the morning and tries to make him talk by provoking him or teasing him. He is not interested in anything else besides his toy models. It doesn¡¯t matter what Yawang says or do, she will not get a reaction from him. She suspects Xia Mu have a serious case of childhood autism. _______________________________________________________________ Yawang reports her observations to her father, and he reply, ¡°If he wasn¡¯t autistic, I wouldn¡¯t let you go! I want you to pass some of the ADHD you have to him.¡± Yawang twitches the edge of her lip. ¡°If I pass some of the ADHD to him, what will happen if he passes some of the autism to me?¡± Her dad looks at her with a relieved expression on his face. ¡°That would be great.¡± This old man! She gives up talking to him. Every day, she goes to Xia Mu¡¯s place and does the same routine. She would go into his room, occupy his bed, read her comics, eat her snacks, and take a nap. He plays with his things, she play with hers. No interference, no disturbance. Then, one day, Xia Mu catches Yawang¡¯s attention when he is playing with a toy model of the QSZ-92-5.8. This type of gun model is only given to the officers with some sort of rank. She remembers her father owning one. When she was little, she used to steal it from the safe to play. Don¡¯t be fooled from its small appearance, it¡¯s actually quite heavy. She just started to play with it when she was caught by one of the patrolling officers. The officer took her and the gun to her father. Her father punished her severely and ever since that day, she never saw that gun in her home. She sees Xia Mu disassembling the gun quickly, as if he¡¯s done it often. He takes out a cotton cloth and starts to wipe every area of the gun slowly. She looks at the disassembled parts: the sleeve gun, barrel, muzzle cap, recoil spring rod, connector, firing mechanism, bullet, and the hook shank. All of the eight parts are there, just like the ones she sees in the military magazines. ¡°Wow, toy models nowadays look just like the real ones!¡± He ignore her and continues to wipe the parts. After he¡¯s done, he assembles the parts back together. ¡°Wow, let Jiejie look at it.¡± She takes it away from his hands. Wow, so heavy, just like the real one! Xia Mu, who has been quiet this whole time, suddenly jumps up and tries to grab the gun back. Yawang raises her arms so he can¡¯t reach for it. Ha, finally got a reaction from this little guy! ¡°Let Jiejie play with it.¡± His eyes widen and he tries to grab the gun back. His eyes are full of anger and shock, like an untamed little beast. She continues to tease him by raising the gun higher above her head. ¡°Call me Jiejie and I will give it back to you.¡± Xia Mu glares at her and jumps up to reach for the gun. He only reaches Yawang¡¯s chest, so he can¡¯t get the gun no matter how hard he tries. He suddenly backs up and jump again, grabbing one of her arms when she jolts backward in shock, and pulling it down. Yawang didn¡¯t give in to him and resists, moving the gun further away from his reach. He¡¯s not physically stronger than Yawang, so he still didn¡¯t succeed in grabbing the gun. Then, he opens his mouth and bites into her right wrist. ¡°Ow, it hurts!¡± She yelps, her eyes brimming in tears from the pain. She let go of the gun, having it fall to the floor, but he didn¡¯t let go. She tries to shake him off, but he wouldn¡¯t budge, like a stubborn dog. She can¡¯t handle the pain and starts to scream. The maid, Auntie Mei, hears her cries and rush up the stairs to see what¡¯s going on. She stands by the door in shock, and run towards them. ¡°What is going on? Xia Mu, let go!¡± Xia Mu won¡¯t listen to her, his teeth digging deeper into Yawang¡¯s skin. She cries in pain and Auntie Mei uses her hand to open up Xia Mu¡¯s lower jaw, freeing Yawang¡¯s wrist. Yawang pulls her wrist back, the two rows of bloody teeth marks with streams of blood flowing out. She glares at Xia Mu in anger. He bends his waist to retrieve his gun. He looks back at her, the corner of his lips covered with her blood, and said, ¡°Don¡¯t touch my things.¡± Another maid, Auntie Cheng, walks up the stairs to their room and cover Yawang¡¯s wrist with a white handkerchief. ¡°We need to go to the hospital.¡± She presses her other hand onto the handkerchief and go to the military hospital with Auntie Cheng. The doctor gives her a shot and tells her not to worry. He said since the bite is deep, there might be a scar afterwards. Yawang look at the white bandages around her wrist, her anger boiling inside. I can¡¯t believe I¡¯m being bullied by a ten year old! When she arrives home, she show her mother the bandage. Her mother looks at her in sadness as she gently rub the bandage, glaring at her father. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°I told you to not have Yawang go into the Xia¡¯s family home, look what happen to Yawang! That kid¡¯s brain is not well you know.¡± ¡°What are you talking about? Xia Mu is fine, he¡¯s a smart kid.¡± ¡°A smart kid will bite a person? He¡¯s just like a dog.¡± Yawang nods her head and chimes in, ¡°A small wild dog.¡± ¡°What dog?!¡± Her father angrily hits the table and glare at Yawang. ¡°When your Uncle Xia took a bullet for me, he didn¡¯t say it hurts. What¡¯s wrong with being bitten by his son?!¡± Yawang touch the bandage softly, it¡¯s not you who was bitten, of course you don¡¯t hurt. Her mother slaps her father out of anger. ¡°Can¡¯t you see how pale our daughter looks from the pain?!¡± Her father heaves out a sigh. ¡°Yawang, Xia Mu is a pitiable child, let him be.¡± He heaves another sigh before talking about Xia Mu¡¯s life. ¡°Xia Mu used to be a very cute child. He loves to smile and laugh, really playful, and everyone adores him. When he was six, he already knows all types of weaponry in the world! Old Xia would always say how his son, Xia Mu, is his biggest pride. His father was a CAPF (Chinese Armed Police Force) stationed in the town of the Yunnan province. Half a year ago, he died in the line of duty from a drug enforcement task. After he died, Xia Mu¡¯s mom locked Xia Mu and herself in the house, not letting anyone in. Everyone thought she was just depressed. After four days, Commander Xia ordered people to break in the house. When they arrived to the master bedroom, they found Xia Mu¡¯s mother, clutching onto her wedding photo, committed suicide. And little Xia Mu, he was sitting in the corner, gazing upon her with red and swollen eyes. People guessed that she wanted to take Xia Mu with her, but at the end, she couldn¡¯t bear to do it. No one knows even to this day, how Xia Mu lived with a dead body for three days. From then on, the lively Xia Mu is gone. We said his soul has gone with his parents, leaving behind a beautiful shell.¡± Her father looks at her after he finishes the story. ¡°Yawang, I owe my life to his father. Even if he¡¯s not here anymore, I still want his son to be his biggest pride.¡± That night, Yawang keeps on thinking about Xia Mu¡¯s story. If I was put into the same position as Xia Mu¡­.no I can¡¯t think about it. But this happened to Xia Mu, such a beautiful child, stuck in a room stenched with blood and decomposition. She forces herself to imagine the scene, then forces herself to not think about it. At the end, she is unable to sleep and keep on tossing to her sides. _______________________________________________________________ The next day, Yawang arrive late to Xia Mu¡¯s home, her dark circles evident below her eyes. Before, Yawang don¡¯t know why Xia Mu have dark circles at such a young age, but after listening to the story, she thinks she knows why. When she arrives in front of Xia Mu¡¯s room, he is sitting on the floor, playing with a J-12 fighter jet model. His fingers pause when he hears the door open, but continues on afterwards. She sits beside him, not knowing what to say to get his attention. She feels helpless whenever she looks at Xia Mu. She looks at his fingers as he play with the model; they¡¯re beautiful yet pale, flexible yet skinny. She moves her body towards him, looking at him directly in the eye. ¡°Xia Mu, Jiejie heard that you stayed with a dead body for three days.¡± His fingers stop moving and his eyeballs starts to shift. ¡°I heard it¡¯s your mother.¡± Xia Mu curls up his fingers tightly into a fist, maybe too tightly because his hands are shaking. ¡°Can you tell me how you spent those three days?¡± Xia Mu¡¯s eyes widen and he pounce himself onto her. Her back is lying flatly against the floor and he is right on top of her. Her hand reaches his chin, preventing him from opening his jaw. ¡°You¡¯re trying to bite me again, aren¡¯t you?¡± She forcefully turn her body over, making Xia Mu lying on the floor. ¡°Xia Mu, you¡¯ve been dreaming of your mother dying right? Every day, the scene just replays itself. You can¡¯t fall asleep because of it right?¡± Xia Mu struggles to free himself from her. Yawang tightens her grip on him so he can¡¯t escape. ¡°Xia Mu, you¡¯re scared right? You¡¯re scared every night right?¡± Suddenly, Xia Mu stops struggling. His beautiful eyes start to glisten in tears, then slowly, the tears stream down his face. He bites his lips as he cry, trying to not admit that he¡¯s breaking down. Yawang loosens her grip on him and sits up. ¡°Stupid, should have cried a long time ago.¡± Her dad told her, ever since Xia Mu was saved that day, they never saw him cry. She think she made a mistake to do this, but reaffirm herself that having him cry will make him feel better. It will be like an old scar being torn harshly, letting the blood and pain flow out, healing the scar. ¡°Xia Mu, my dad told me to let you have your way. But I¡¯ve been thinking the whole night, and I think I shouldn¡¯t do that. I¡¯m not going to pity you, because I really want to be your friend, staying by your side through hardships and joy.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t need you to be by my side!¡± He strongly oppose. She ignore him and continues talking. ¡°Even though I can pretend I don¡¯t know and try to be close to you by being nice, I know it¡¯s not going to work. You¡¯re a kid with a very strong self-esteem, so a friendship based on pity is not going to work, so I¡¯m going to be honest with you. I am the one that knows your past, know what you¡¯re struggling with-¡± ¡°Shut up!¡± He yells as he struck Yawang with his hand. She holds onto the hand that struck her. ¡°Cry, yell, get mad, hit people, great! Finally you¡¯re not like a dummy!¡± _______________________________________________________________ The next few days, Yawang finally knows a way to interact with Xia Mu. It is to constantly annoy him, making him mad and wanting to bite her. Of course after being bitten once by him, she will not let him bite her a second time. They will fight every two to three days, and Yawang always hold him down by grabbing both of his arms. From then on, whenever you ask Xia Mu a question, he will not answer. However if you ask him who he hates, he will answer Shu Yawang with no hesitation. His family will ask him that question to hear him talk. Yawang feels happy when he says her name, even though it¡¯s not for a good reason. His family pats her shoulder to reward her accomplishments, Commander Xia included. Whenever Commander Xia pats her shoulder, Yawang feels like she is receiving a medal from him. Yawang is proud of herself, after all, taking care of Xia Mu, is not an easy task. Chapter 2: Childhood love- tang xiao tian Chapter 2: Childhood love- tang xiao tian Shu Yawang purses her lips before saying, ¡°I only treat you well.¡± _______________________________________________________________ The weather is quite nice today. Shu Yawang opens the window and extends her upper body out from the fourth floor to look at the scenery. The streets are wet from the light rain in the early morning, bringing in a slight cool breeze. Yawang eats her breakfast before heading out to Xia Mu¡¯s home. Her mother tells her to bring her summer vacation homework with her before she leaves. She nods her head lazily and grabs a random book before heading out the door. As she walks past the playground, she sees Tang Xiao Tian doing push ups. Underneath him is a sheet of newspapers, dripping wet from his sweat. He grits his teeth as he does his push ups, his father monitoring him closely with his arms folded across his chest. Looking at the situation, Yawang guess that Xiao Tian is in some sort of trouble. When she tries to walk away, his father sees her and calls out, ¡°Yawang!¡± Shu Yawang lifts the corners of her lips to make a smile and walk over to them. ¡°Good morning, Uncle Tang.¡± His face softens as he smiles warmly back to Yawang. ¡°You came just in time, go sit on him.¡± ¡°Dad!¡± Xiao Tian stands up from his push up position and gives a pleading look to his dad. ¡°Don¡¯t you know how heavy Yawang is right now?¡± His father kick his shins. ¡°No matter how heavy she is, you can still take it! Aren¡¯t you strong? Don¡¯t you like to fight? If you¡¯re not able to drench the newspaper with sweat today, don¡¯t you even dare stand up. Yawang, go sit on him.¡± ¡°Um, Uncle Tang, I have somewhere to go to.¡± ¡°Huh?¡± His father looks at her sternly. Shu Yawang rubs her nose and walk towards Xiao Tan, sitting herself down on his back. He grunts from the weight and lies down flat onto the newspaper. His father, displeased, kicks him. ¡°Get up.¡± Xiao Tian lifts himself up slowly, his posture wobbly as he try to do push ups with Yawang on top of him. Yawang tries to help him by placing both of her feet on the ground. His sweat streams down to his chin, lingering for a second before it drops to the newspaper. ¡°Get your feet off the ground Yawang.¡± He uses his foot to push Yawang¡¯s feet off from the ground, making Xiao Tan inhale a sharp breath from her weight. ¡°I don¡¯t think you¡¯ll have enough strength to fight anymore today.¡± His father nods his head approvingly, then looks at Yawang. ¡°Yawang, watch him for me today. Don¡¯t let him get up until you see the newspaper is fully drenched with his sweat.¡± She smiles and nods her head. ¡°Okay.¡± His father smiles and ruffles her hair. ¡°Good girl, Uncle Tang is off to work now.¡± She waves goodbye to him as he leaves. Uncle Tang and her father are close friends, and Yawang and Xiao Tan have known each other since they were little. They always play together every day, causing trouble and getting punished from it. Xiao Tian have to do push ups as punishment and his father can never bear to punish Yawang, so he tells her to sit on him and watches over him instead. When they were little, Xiao Tian can barely lift himself up from Yawang¡¯s weight, and they would always fall to the ground in pain. Now as they grow older, Xiao Tian can easily do twenty push ups with Yawang on him effortlessly. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Is my dad gone?¡± She looks out to see if his father is still there. ¡°Yeah.¡± Xiao Tian plops down to the ground, making Yawang fall as well. He takes in a couple of breaths before turning his head to Yawang. ¡°Why didn¡¯t you go away when you see Dad punishing me?¡± ¡°I didn¡¯t have enough time to.¡± She answers with a laugh. She looks at the newspaper, a large puddle of sweat has formed. ¡°How many did you do?¡± Xiao Tian wipes off the sweat on his face. ¡°Don¡¯t remember, probably at least two hundred.¡± He sits up and throws his arm out to Yawang. ¡°What have you been doing these past days? I barely see you anymore.¡± Yawang crumples up the wet newspaper and tosses in a nearby garbage can. ¡°I¡¯m tutoring a kid.¡± He laughs at her answer, looking at her in disbelief. ¡°You?¡± ¡°Yeah, me.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t teach the kid bad things.¡± Yawang glares at him and slowly raises her arm. ¡°Don¡¯t make me hit you.¡± Xiao Tian chuckles back, not flinching one bit. She rests her hand onto his shoulder, giving it a gentle pat. Xiao Tan is breathing heavily from the punishment, his head nudging onto his shoulder to wipe his sweat with his shirt. ¡°Tsk, just like a puppy.¡± She said, taking out some tissues from her bag. She lifts his head up and starts to pat the sweat onto the tissue. Maybe it¡¯s because he¡¯s sweating so much, some bits of the tissue stay on his face and hair. Yawang slowly picks the bits off from his face and hair, collecting them onto her palm. Xiao Tian looks at her as she continues to take the bits of tissue off from him, with her bright, round eyes and gentle smile. He leans closer to her and whisper softly, ¡°Yawang, you¡¯re so kind. Yawang purses her lips before saying, ¡°I only treat you well.¡± Xiao Tian rubs his nose and chuckle, his cheeks flushed from embarrassment. Yawang sees how embarrassed he look and teases him. ¡°You fool.¡± Don¡¯t judge a person from their appearance. A handsome boy who is 180cm that is constantly involved with fights, is extremely innocent and pure. If a girl comes closer to him or flirts with him, he will instantly blush and you will be able to hear his heart racing within three steps away. Maybe because of that, many girls confess to him. And everytime he rejects them with his ears perked red, Yawang wants to kick him. Fine, she did kick him, about twenty times freshmen year. That doesn¡¯t include the confessions she did not get to witness. Later, she heard from his best friend, Zhang Jing Yu, that apart from the time his face was red from his first confession, the rest was because he was scared of Yawang. He is scared that she will be nearby to kick him so he grew aware of his surroundings everytime he gets a confession. However, she will still manage to kick him on the shins. As he grew aware of her, he gets nervous, and when he gets nervous, his face will turn red. Yawang unknowingly smiles when thinking back about it. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°What are you laughing at?¡± Yawang stands up and brush the dirt away from her clothes. ¡°Nothing.¡± Xiao Tian stands up after her. ¡°Where are you going later?¡± ¡°Tutoring.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t go. The mall just open up a new internet cafe and we get to play for free for three days. Zhang Jing Yu can hold seats for us, let¡¯s go.¡± Yawang is a little hesitant from his offer, they are all obsessed with this new online martial arts game called ¡°Legend¡±. But playing the game requires a charge card, and Yawang don¡¯t have much allowance left to use. Her fingers start to itch to think of playing. ¡°But I need to go tutor.¡± She reply when she thinks of her current responsibilities. ¡°If you don¡¯t come, I¡¯m not holding the spot for you.¡± ¡°Ah, come on.¡± She pulls his arm and smile. ¡°You go first, I¡¯ll go later.¡± ¡°Alright, I¡¯ll wait for you there.¡± He leaves right after saying that. _______________________________________________________________ She sees Xia Mu sitting on the floor in his bedroom wiping his gun. ¡°Xia Mu, let¡¯s go out today. Aren¡¯t you bored staying home all day?¡± And of course, he didn¡¯t reply. She gives a smirk and starts to walk towards him. Xia Mu quickly assembles back his QSZ-92 and stuffs it into his back pocket, looking back at her suspiciously. ¡°I¡¯ll bring you to an internet cafe, alright? Don¡¯t you like looking at army weapons? There¡¯s constant updates of them online.¡± Xia Mu¡¯s eyes shift to the side, contemplating, then he slowly nods his head. Yawang smiles widely and grasp onto his hand, leading him out of his room. His hand feels cold and bony from her touch. Xia Mu tries to release her grasp from him, but she will quickly grab his hand back. They walk out of the villa and walk to Yawang¡¯s home to get her bicycle. She wheels her bicycle towards him and points to the back seat. He looks at the front seat instead, his face full of thoughts. ¡°What? You want to sit at the front?¡± He shakes his head and sits at the back. Yawang holds tightly to the handlebars as she sits at the front. The sun is shining brightly and the summer heat is on the rise, so Yawang chooses to bike under the shades where the large trees are. Xia Mu silently sits behind her, but when she suddenly brake to a stop, his body clings tightly to her back. They arrive in front of the mall within thirty minutes, and the internet cafe is packed with high school students. Yawang manages to find Tang Xiao Tian and Zhang Jing Yu at the back and she quickly walk towards them while holding onto Xia Mu¡¯s hand. She pats Xiao Tian¡¯s shoulder, but since he is fully concentrated in killing a wild pig, he didn¡¯t react. Jing Yu, however, react immediately when she pats his shoulder. ¡°You¡¯re finally here, I¡¯ve been waiting forever.¡± He gets up from his seat and tells Yawang to sit. ¡°I¡¯ll be back at seven.¡± Yawang looks at the time, it¡¯s currently 12:30pm. ¡°Okay, go home and take a nap.¡± Zhang Jing Yu and his friends have been playing in the internet cafe since the first day it was opened. They will take turns playing, his friends will play during the day and he will come at night, taking advantage of the promotion to the maximum. ¡°Use my card to play and help me upgrade.¡± Yawang shakes her head. ¡°I can¡¯t beat the magician.¡± ¡°You¡¯re useless. I¡¯m leaving, Xiao Tian.¡± Zhang Jing Yu stifles out a yawn before leaving, and Yawang is able to see four cavities from his yawning. Finally, Xiao Tian turns his head around. ¡°Who¡¯s this kid?¡± ¡°The kid I¡¯m tutoring.¡± Xiao Tian smiles cheerfully to Xia Mu. ¡°Hi, I¡¯m Tang Xiao Tian.¡± Xia Mu didn¡¯t answer him back, staring blankly at the computer screen. Xiao Tian rubs his nose, feeling a bit offended. ¡°I don¡¯t think he likes me.¡± ¡°He¡¯s like that, he don¡¯t really talk much.¡± She have Xia Mu sit on the computer chair and go to find another chair for herself. She place the chair between Xia Mu and Xiao Tian and sits down. ¡°Have you ever go online before?¡± Xia Mu shakes his head. ¡°Alright, let me teach you, I¡¯m your tutor afterall.¡± She holds onto the mouse and teaches Xia Mu how to type words into the search engines and help him make an account for the game ¡°Legend¡±. She teaches him the basics of the game and Xia Mu, a smart child, quickly catches on. With the help of Xiao Tian whose in level 40, Xia Mu quickly rises up to level 7 in less than two hours. Since you will need to use a charge card after reaching level 7, Yawang lets Xia Mu uses Jing Yu¡¯s card to continue playing. After awhile, Xiao Tian stands up and lets Yawang play with his card. She¡¯s playing as a warrior, and that¡¯s an easy position, you just need to kill off the monsters. However, she keeps on forgetting to add blood everytime she kills them, making Xiao Tian constantly reminding her from the back. When Xia Mu lets Yawang play with Jing Yu¡¯s card, it gets more challenging. The operating keys that the magicians use are from F1 to F8, and she never remembers which key is for which move. Every time when she is in danger, Xia Mu will stretch out his small hand and press the keys for her, helping her add blood, add magic, or using the magic shield. ¡°Ugh, I forgot again.¡± She would mutter to herself. Xia Mu briefly glance at her before looking back at the computer screen to help her. _______________________________________________________________ Time flies by when you go online, they haven¡¯t play for long, but the sky is already turning dark. Yawang is sitting between Xiao Tian and Xia Mu who teamed up to fight a monster when suddenly a hand slaps against Xiao Tian¡¯s shoulder. ¡°Tang Xiao Tian!¡± Yawang and Xiao Tian both turn their heads. They can¡¯t immediately recognize the person from his swollen face, but Yawang manage to figure out the person to be the high school senior, Cheng Wei. His father is a construction foreman, and whoever dares to mess with Cheng Wei in school will get a threat of getting beat up by migrant workers. Behind Cheng Wei stands seven to eight tanned, built men. ¡°You brought your girlfriend too?¡± Tang Xiao Tian stands up in front of Yawang, protecting her. ¡°Cheng Wei, what¡¯s your deal with bringing so much guys here?¡± ¡°You scared now? You weren¡¯t scared when you were fighting with me yesterday.¡± He points to Yawang and Xiao Tian before yelling out an order. ¡°Pull them out.¡± A couple men pull their arms to lead them outside. Yawang forcefully steps back, blocking Xia Mu from their view. Xiao Tian pulls off the hands that are holding onto Yawang. ¡°Cheng Wei, if you want revenge, then just take it on me! Why pull her in this?¡± ¡°She is part of my revenge,¡± He looks to the crowd in the internet cafe. ¡°Whoever dares to call the police will not be able to leave this place.¡± The men pull Yawang and Xiao Tian out of the cafe. Yawang keeps on giving Xia Mu signals to tell him to run back home. They are pulled to the back alley, both of their backs hitting against the wall. She hides behind Xiao Tian as he protects her. ¡°Cheng Wei, you can do whatever you want to me tonight, but don¡¯t touch Yawang.¡± ¡°I¡¯m going to touch her, I¡¯m going to teach you a lesson, Tang Xiao Tian. How else am I going to continue to have things my way in school?¡± Xiao Tian places one hand behind his back and reach for Yawang¡¯s. He grasp onto it and can feel Yawang¡¯s hand shaking in fear. He shakes it once, she knows what he¡¯s telling her. He tells her to run when she sees a chance. She shakes her hand back and Xiao Tian lets go of his grasp. He lunges towards Cheng Wei and Yawang starts to run as fast as she can. The men goes to help Cheng Wei, making it easier for Yawang to escape. Cheng Wei wipes the blood off from his lips and glare at Xiao Tian. ¡°Beat him up!¡± _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang bites her lips as she limps away. She turns her head and sees Xiao Tian being thrown to the ground. She turns her head back and runs as fast as she can, I have to get out of here and get help before he gets beaten to death! ¡°Get her!¡± she hears Cheng Wei yelling as he chases after her. She moves to the left and aims her kick to his waist. He stumbles from the blow and she runs away, but he quickly catches up and got a hold of her. He clutches onto her wrist and glare at her furiously. Yawang can hear Xiao Tian yelling at a distance, ¡°Shit! Cheng Wei, if you dare hit her, I will kill you!¡± ¡°You bitch, I¡¯ll show you!¡± He raises his hand and strike his palm down, hitting Yawang¡¯s arms. The blow stings her arm like a blazing fire. ¡°How dare you block me?¡± Cheng Wei grabs Yawang¡¯s arms so she won¡¯t be able to block. She shuts her eyes as she murmurs to herself. He is so screwed, I¡¯m going to show my dad my injuries and have him destroy his house! ¡°Stop.¡± A cold voice speaks out from a distance. Yawang slowly opens her eyes and turns her head to the voice. It¡¯s Xia Mu, who¡¯s pointing his QSZ-92 towards Cheng Wei. ¡°Let her go.¡± Xia Mu tells Cheng Wei. ¡°Haha, you kid, you¡¯re bringing a toy gun to scare me? Don¡¯t be silly.¡± Cheng Wei laughs. ¡°It¡¯s real.¡± ¡°Real? Do you think I¡¯m an idiot?¡± Cheng Wei crouches down and pats Xia Mu¡¯s head. ¡°It¡¯s getting late, go back home to your mom.¡± His men roar with laughter as if they had heard the funniest joke of their lives. Yawang looks over to Xia Mu helplessly. This kid, I tell him to run back home, why did he run back here? Does he think he will be able to fool them with his toy gun? Xia Mu lowers his gun, tilting it to the side and placing the gun barrel gently against Cheng Wei¡¯s head. ¡°Type 92 handgun. Produced in China. Has a 5.8mm caliber and uses DAP5.8mm bullets, The total length of the gun is 188mm and it can carry up to 20 bullets, making the world¡¯s most lethal handgun.¡± Xia Mu tilts his head to the side when he finish speaking. ¡°Do you want to see if it¡¯s real or fake?¡± Chapter 3: A father’s pride Chapter 3: A father¡¯s pride Tang Xiao Tian, if you¡¯re a man, you cannot let a girl suffer because of you! _______________________________________________________________ Everyone stands in their place in shock, looking at the boy who is holding onto a gun with such a mysterious force that even Shu Yawang cannot tell if the gun is real or fake. She remembered when she first held the gun, it felt the same as the gun her father owned, both of them feeling cold and heavy in her hand. ¡°I¡­I don¡¯t believe it¡¯s real.¡± Cheng Wei sputters out, a drop of sweat falling down from his forehead. ¡°So, that means you want to try it for yourself, correct?¡± Xia Mu calmly asks him. The corner of his lips lifts up slightly and Yawang gulp nervously. It¡¯s real. ¡°It looks just like the real one, I don¡¯t believe-¡± ¡°Do you know who his grandfather is?! If he brings a machine gun instead of a handgun, it¡¯s highly possible that it¡¯s real!¡± Yawang yells out. ¡°But even if it¡¯s real, he wouldn¡¯t dare to fire.¡± Cheng Wei reply with a shaky breath, his body stiffens from the fear. ¡°Really?¡± Xia Mu asks, his finger reaching for the trigger. ¡°Hey. Hey, Xia Mu!¡± Yawang calls out his name nervously. This kid, he¡¯s always so quiet and mysterious. When he looks at you without saying a word, you can get goosebumps. Xia Mu flicks his wrist and tilts his head. ¡°Bang.¡± He murmurs softly. ¡°Ah!¡± Cheng Wei screams, falling to the ground and sliding backwards in fear. He breathes out heavily and glares at Xia Mu. ¡°Coward.¡± Xia Mu chuckles. Cheng Wei points a finger at him in outrage, and at that time, two beams of light cast upon them. It¡¯s a military vehicle that¡¯s heading their direction. A man in a military uniform steps out from the vehicle when it stops by them. Xia Mu turns his head back and look at the man, then puts his gun away. The man in the uniform walk towards Yawang and Xia Mu. ¡°Get in the car.¡± He order. Yawang nods her head and pulls Xia Mu towards the car. When they reach to the side, Zhang Jing Yu¡¯s head pop out from the car window. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°You guys alright?¡± Apparently, when Jing Yu is walking back to the internet cafe, he sees them being dragged out by these hoodlums. He wants to call the police at first, but the cafe owner tell him not to, afraid that Cheng Wei and his men will damage his cafe if they call the police. So Jing Yu have no choice but to call Xiao Tian¡¯s dad for help. He thought that since Xiao Tian¡¯s dad is the regimental commander, he will bring a lot of people, but when he waited for the vehicle to arrive, he saw there was only one person in it! ¡°Can Uncle Tang fight all of them?¡± Zhang Jing Yu asks warily. ¡°Don¡¯t worry, Uncle Tang was trained in the special forces, these guys are nothing to him.¡± ¡°No wonder Xiao Tian fights so well.¡± ¡°My ass! He made me got slapped! He better compensate me afterwards.¡± Yawang grumbles, rubbing her arms that block Cheng Wei¡¯s forceful slap. She turns her head back to Xia Mu who¡¯s been sitting silently. ¡°Thank you, Xia Mu.¡± Xia Mu looks back at her, not saying a word. She squirms closer to him and whispers, ¡°Where did you get the gun from? It¡¯s really dangerous, you shouldn¡¯t carry it all the time.¡± ¡°It¡¯s fake.¡± ¡°Huh? How is it fake? You said-¡± ¡°I lied.¡± Yawang is stunned for awhile, then hugged Xia Mu really hard. ¡°Xia Mu, you were so handsome! How can you be so cool?! So handsome and cute!¡± Xia Mu struggles to break away from her embrace, but she stubbornly holds him tight. At that moment, Yawang thinks Xia Mu is awesome. ¡°Let go of me!¡± Xia Mu complain, trying to break free with his head turned to the side, showing a hint of blush on his face. Yawang¡¯s hand goes towards his face and starts to pinch his cheek. ¡°Aw, you¡¯re blushing.¡± She teases. ¡°No, I¡¯m not.¡± He replies back, showing a serious face. Yawang giggles. ¡°Oh really? Let¡¯s try it again.¡± She hugs him again, her chin burying into his hair. She sees how red Xia Mu¡¯s face is from the hug, this is so fun! Xia Mu forcefully pulls his arm out and shouts to Yawang, ¡°Let go of me!¡± This girl is so annoying! I shouldn¡¯t have helped her! When these two are fighting, Uncle Tang brought Tang Xiao Tian over to the car. Xiao Tian¡¯s eyes are swollen and there are purple bruises around his face, he is also limping as he walks. When Yawang sees them, she quickly got out of the car to help him. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Xiao Tian¡­¡± He looks at Yawang, whose face is full of concern. ¡°I¡¯m alright, it doesn¡¯t hurt. What about you? Does it hurt?¡± Xiao Tian reaches for the arm that Cheng Wei hits and strokes on it gently. ¡°I¡¯m sorry Yawang.¡± He apologizes, feeling guilty and heartbroken. The stinging pain from her arm suddenly soothes down when Xiao Tian touches it, and Yawang don¡¯t feel any pain anymore. She awkwardly pulls her arm back and smile. ¡°I¡¯m alright, it doesn¡¯t hurt.¡± ¡°Yawang, get in the car.¡± Uncle Tang orders coldly. She nods her head and helps Xiao Tian get in the car. When they both sit down on the seats, Uncle Tang gives out another order. ¡°Get out.¡± ¡°Huh?¡± Both of them asks, looking at each other. ¡°Tang Xiao Tian, I said get out! Walk home on your own!¡± ¡°But Uncle, Xiao Tian is hurt.¡± Yawang pleads to Uncle Tang. He is way too harsh to his kid! ¡°Get out right now!¡± He order again. Xiao Tian¡¯s eyes reddened and he bites his lips before getting up from his seat. He opens the door and steps out of the car. Yawang who¡¯s been watching him, also stands up from her seat. ¡°I¡¯m going to walk home too.¡± She steps out of the car and stands beside Xiao Tian. Uncle Tang looks at both of them in disbelief. ¡°Tang Xiao Tian, if you¡¯re a man, you don¡¯t let a girl suffer because of you! If Yawang wasn¡¯t here today, see if I would save you!¡± Xiao Tian lowers his head and nudge Yawang with his arm. ¡°Get back in the car.¡± ¡°No.¡± ¡°Go.¡± He whispers back softly. He lifts his head up to look at Yawang, the tears gathering up in his eyes, swirling brightly like the stars in the sky. Yawang unwillingly turns back and walk to the car. Uncle Tang starts the engine and drives away, Xiao Tian¡¯s face turning smaller and smaller as they drive further away. ¡°Uncle Tang, you¡¯re way too harsh on Xiao Tian. You even made him cry! You¡¯re so evil.¡± She yells out to him as tears stream down on her face. Uncle Tang looks back at her through the rearview mirror. ¡°You girl, it¡¯s been so many years, and yet you still cry whenever Xiao Tian gets punished!¡± ¡°Who tells you to punish him so severely! Don¡¯t you feel bad?¡± I feel bad. Yawang says in her mind, but didn¡¯t want to say out loud. ¡°Yawang-ah, there are too many soft men nowadays. I want my son to be a real man, a strong and courageous man with integrity! I hope, he can be my pride. Unless, you don¡¯t want him to.¡± Uncle Tang asks with a chuckle. Yawang nods her head slightly. ¡°I do.¡± They reach Yawang¡¯s home quickly, and both Yawang and Xia Mu steps out from the car. Uncle Tang continues to drive, bringing Zhang Jing Yu back to his home. Yawang is not in a rush to go home, she wants to wait until Xiao Tian arrives, and it¡¯s not far away from Xia Mu¡¯s home, he can walk home by himself. She looks down at Xia Mu and her eyes widened. ¡°Xia Mu, are¡­are you-¡± Xia Mu¡¯s hands are clenched together, shaking slightly. ¡°My dad often said, he hopes I can become his pride.¡± _______________________________________________________________ ¡°When I do something wrong, he would often punish me. He would punish me severely and my mom will feel bad. She would look at my wounds and rub them softly.¡± Xia Mu looks at Yawang, biting his lips as he try hard not to cry. Yawang feels bad for him, she really hope that a beautiful child like Xia Mu will find his happiness. ¡°Xia Mu. You become my pride, okay? Whenever you get hurt, I will rub them gently for you, alright?¡± Xia Mu bites down his lower lip, not shaking or nodding his head in reply. Yawang slowly stretches out her hand and hold onto his right hand. ¡°I¡¯ll take you home.¡± She walks a few steps forward and look back. Xia Mu stands in place, then starts to walk. Their shadows overlap each others in the moonlight as she walks Xia Mu back to his home. After that night, he starts to accept Yawang. Whenever she enters his room, he don¡¯t get defensive and he would even let her play with his military models, except for the gun. Even though he still don¡¯t like to talk to her, he would glance at her from time to time while she¡¯s talking. _______________________________________________________________ At the last day of summer break, Yawang goes to Xia Mu¡¯s home and greets the maids as they open the door for her. She rushes upstairs to Xia Mu¡¯s room without knocking on the door. Xia Mu is sitting on a chair, his head down while he is drawing. She creep up slowly behind him and look at what he is drawing. Xia Mu places a blank paper on top of a military magazine that has a military tank on the cover. She gets closer and shouts in his ear. ¡°Wow!¡± Xia Mu, who was startled from the sound, accidentally draws a line over the finished drawing, the pencil making a crisp, sharp sound. ¡°Oh, sorry.¡± Xia Mu looks at the ruined drawing, then looks at Yawang who doesn¡¯t look sorry. ¡°Is that a condemning look you¡¯re giving me?¡± She asks with a laugh. Xia Mu turns his head back to the drawing. He crumples the drawing into a ball and throws it into the trash can. ¡°Wah, you¡¯re angry.¡± She pokes Xia Mu¡¯s head with a finger. ¡°You¡¯re angry? If you¡¯re angry then bite me, you haven¡¯t bit me for awhile.¡± Xia Mu squints his eyes slightly and turns his head back to bite her finger. Yawang quickly retrieves her finger and looks at him. ¡°For real?¡± He looks at her defiantly. ¡°Didn¡¯t you tell me to bite you?¡± ¡°Haha, when I tell you to bite, you bite. Such a good kid.¡± She rubs his head with her hand, looking at him like he¡¯s the cutest thing. Xia Mu escapes from her evil hand and turns his head back. He places another blank piece of paper on top and starts tracing. Yawang looks over and shakes her head. Kids will be kids, even when he trace it over, it¡¯s ugly. ¡°From tomorrow on, I won¡¯t be coming.¡± She tells him as she sits on his bed with her legs crossed. His hand stops tracing, his eyes wandering around. Yawang takes out a sketchpad and pencil out from her bookbag. ¡°I¡¯ve been your tutor for two months, but I hadn¡¯t taught you anything.¡± She sits up and grabs the military tank model on the bedside drawer and places it on top of the table before looking at Xia Mu. ¡°On the last day, let me teach you how to draw a military tank.¡± She pats the space next to her, inviting Xia Mu to sit on the bed. She calls out to him twice, but he didn¡¯t give a response. Her eyebrows narrowed, what is he doing? Turning this into an awkward atmosphere. She have no choice, but to pull him to the bed. Both of them rest their backs on the wall, their legs folded so they can hold onto the sketchpad. As she teaches Xia Mu how to draw, she will look at Xia Mu¡¯s pad from time to time and fix the mistakes he make. She have been drawing for seven years, but she don¡¯t know how to teach someone how to draw. She would just draw a few strokes and look back at Xia Mu to see if he¡¯s following. Xia Mu cannot get focused from the drawing lesson. Whenever Yawang tilts her body towards him, he is able to smell a light, sweet scent from her. He likes how her hair will brush by his hand, he likes how close they are. _______________________________________________________________ They look at the two finished drawings they both drew, well, technically Yawang drew both of them. She looks at them proudly, rubbing her nose before speaking, ¡°Not bad.¡± Xia Mu nods his head in agreement, it¡¯s not bad at all. ¡°Haha, then I should use this skill to earn money!¡± She is so happy when she sees him nods his head, much happier than when her teachers compliment her. She signs her name on her drawing, her scratchy handwriting looks like it¡¯s dancing on the paper. She hands the paper to Xia Mu. ¡°For you. Keep it safe, when I get famous, it will be worth a lot of money.¡± Xia Mu takes the paper from her and keeps his head down. Yawang turns her wrist to look at her watch, it¡¯s already lunch time. She packs the pencils and sketch pad into her bag. ¡°I¡¯m going home.¡± Xia Mu didn¡¯t reply back. She bends her waist slightly to reach his level. ¡°Xia Mu ah, you are so quiet, you¡¯ll be bullied in school.¡± He keeps staring at the two drawings in his hands. Yawang raises her hand, wanting to ruffle his hair, but he moves his head slightly to prevent that from happening. She narrows her eyebrows and forcefully grab his hair before ruffling it hard, messing up his hair. He glares back at her, but she¡¯s so used to it, she just makes a face in reply. ¡°Oh right, are you going to take the shuttle bus to school tomorrow or do you want to go biking with me?¡± ¡°School?¡± He asks as he raises his head and looks at her with confusion. ¡°Yeah, you didn¡¯t know? School is starting tomorrow!¡± She looks at him surprised, then realized something. ¡°Oh, Grandpa must have forgot to told you. He helped you enroll into L City¡¯s Secondary School, the same school that I¡¯m in. Let me tell you, our school is very beautiful, but the food in the cafeteria are horrible. You¡¯ll see for yourself tomorrow-¡± ¡°With you.¡± He says, the corner of his lips tilting upwards. ¡°Huh? What? Oh, okay cycling together. I¡¯ll pick you up tomorrow, okay?¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± He nods his head, his beautiful eyes twinkling. ¡°I¡¯m leaving now, bye bye.¡± She waves her hand at him before leaving. Xia Mu looks at the closed door, then looks back at the two drawings. He walks up to the wall and tapes the two drawings on it. Then, he removes them in fear that he might rip it and puts them in the cabinet. After awhile, he takes them out from the cabinet and roll them up before putting them into the locked drawer near his bed. That¡¯s also where he lock up his QSZ-92. Chapter 4: Time flies by when you’re young Chapter 4: Time flies by when you¡¯re young Shu Yawang thought that she and Tang Xiao Tian will be together forever. Together for life, from birth to death, not one second more, not one second less. _______________________________________________________________ The next morning at 6:30, Tang Xiao Tian bike over to Yawang¡¯s home to pick her up. Shu Yawang fixes her uniform as she walks down the stairs. Secondary school¡¯s uniforms are ugly, no, China¡¯s school uniforms in general are ugly. They¡¯re nowhere as beautiful as the uniforms from South Korea or Japan. Yawang will always think, the department of education always updates their teaching methods they acquired from overseas, why can¡¯t they update the uniform fashion as well? There¡¯s nothing wrong to dress your country¡¯s students nicely. It¡¯s been more than a decade and it¡¯s still the same style; during the spring, fall, and winter, we will wear sports clothing, and during the summer we will wear a white T-shirt with a knee-length navy blue skirt. It¡¯s so outdated! Shu Yawang tugs onto her skirt in frustration, if it wasn¡¯t mandatory to wear our school uniforms on the first day, I will never wear this! ¡°What¡¯s wrong? You don¡¯t look so happy.¡± Xiao Tian asks with a smile. ¡°I hate wearing school uniforms.¡± She grumbles. Xiao Tian can¡¯t help it but pinches her cheek. ¡°You look nice.¡± ¡°What clothes do I not look nice in?¡± She teases him with a smile. He smiles as he lowers his head, scratching his head in embarrassment. ¡°They all look nice, whatever you wear looks nice.¡± Yawang blushes from his answer. She raises her gaze to look at the boy in front of her, a handsome boy with a hint of blush on his cheeks. He¡¯s also wearing the school uniform, a white T-shirt that looks big on him. He¡¯s a tall, skinny kid, and Yawang also thinks that he look nice in whatever clothes he wear since he was little. When they reach Xia Mu¡¯s home, Xia Mu walks up to Yawang and she asks, ¡°Where¡¯s your bicycle?¡± ¡°Don¡¯t have one.¡± ¡°Then why did you say you want to bike to school together?¡± Xia Mu glance at her. ¡°I said I¡¯m going to school with you.¡± Oh right, I think he said to go to school together, not to bike together. She turns her head to look at Xiao Tian. ¡°You take him.¡± He nods his head and pats the back seat of his bicycle. ¡°Get up.¡± He stands in place, as if he didn¡¯t hear anything and continues to look at Yawang. Xiao Tian rubs his nose in embarrassment. ¡°I don¡¯t think he wants me to take him.¡± Yawang sighs. ¡°Alright, I¡¯ll take him.¡± Xia Mu gives a small smirk and sits at the back. She pushes her foot off from the ground and starts to pedal, Xia Mu¡¯s hands clinging tightly onto her uniform. Tang Xiao Tian bikes behind them and he sees Yawang struggling from biking with two people¡¯s weight. ¡°Xia Mu, it¡¯s going to be a long road. Let me take you, Yawang won¡¯t be able bike the whole way like this.¡± Xia Mu glares at him, then turns his head back to ignore him. Xiao Tian hadn¡¯t seen a kid so stubborn before. Yawang sees how dejected Xiao Tian looks and calls out to him, ¡°Xiao Tian, you lead me!¡± ¡°Okay!¡± He pedals to Yawang¡¯s side and she rests one hand on his shoulder and her other hand steering the handlebar as he bikes everyone. ¡°Faster, faster!¡± ¡°I¡¯m really fast right now!¡± ¡°You are slower compared to before.¡± ¡°Hey, I¡¯m carrying one extra person today.¡± ¡°Hahaha, you go Xiao Tian! You¡¯re invincible!¡± At the end, it¡¯s Tang Xiao Tian who¡¯s the most tired. _______________________________________________________________ The L City Secondary School has been around for more than a hundred years, maintaining an old architectural style. There are two clean paths that have pine trees within every couple of meters. The school garden consists of many varieties of flowers and plants. Each of them will have a small wooden sign that have their names and characteristics. The school is separated into two buildings; one for middle school and one for high school. High school consists of three grades and each grade holds twelve classes. They all occupy four floors of the building, each floor consisting three classes. Class One of every grade was determined from the grades that the students have earned from last semester¡¯s final examination. Class One consists of the top thirty students, deeming them as the honor class. The other students are distributed evenly among the other eleven classes according to their averages. Shu Yawang and Tang Xiao Tian are in Junior Year Class Seven, their classroom located at the end of the third floor. When you look out from the hallway of the third floor, you can see the school playground at your right, surrounded with sycamore trees, all with their leafy, green leaves. ¡°Xiao Tian, Yawang, over here!¡± Zhang Jing Yu yells out from the classroom. They walk into the classroom, seeing Jing Yu sitting in the last row. They walk towards him when a male student grabs Xiao Tian¡¯s arm to greet him. Yawang didn¡¯t wait for him and sits down on the seat in front of Jing Yu. She is drinking from her water bottle when Jing Yu shakes her shoulder. ¡°Hey Yawang, did you know? You¡¯re the flower of our class!¡± Yawang is very close in spitting out the water. ¡°Who? Me?¡± ¡°Shocked right?! I¡¯m shocked too.¡± Zhang Jing Yu says with a depressed look. ¡°We only have eight girls in the class and you¡¯re the prettiest out of all of them. This is a tragedy!¡± It turns out that the school starts to separate the students into the liberal arts or science classes, and half the female students choose liberal arts. There are only four liberal arts classes, and the rest of the female students are distributed evenly among the rest of the eight science classes. Every science class has at least ten female students, with Class Seven having the least, only eight female students. Yawang scratches her head and smiles. ¡°What tragedy? I think it¡¯s pretty nice.¡± ¡°Bullcrap, of course you would think it¡¯s nice. If I¡¯m in a classroom with eight boys and thirty girls, I will think it¡¯s nice, really nice.¡± Jing Yu grumbles while hitting his desk. Tang Xiao Tian walks over to them and sits at the seat right next to Yawang. ¡°What¡¯s with him?¡± ¡°Nothing.¡± Yawang turns her head and looks around the classroom. A classroom full of boys, hehe. Half of them look nice, a portion of them are pretty handsome, and very few are extremely good-looking. I hit the jackpot! ¡°Yawang!¡± Xiao Tian calls out as he wave his hand in front of her face. ¡°What¡¯s with her?¡± He asks Jing Yu when she didn¡¯t give a response. ¡°She¡¯s enjoying it!¡± Jing Yu coldly replies. ¡°Enjoying what?¡± ¡°How lucky she is!¡± Pak. A book hits Jing Yu¡¯s head. ¡°I¡¯m not like you.¡± Yawang glares at him. ¡°Oh really? Then go wipe off the saliva on your face.¡± Jing Yu replies back indifferently. ¡°Yawang!¡± Xiao Tian looks at her. ¡°Don¡¯t look at anyone.¡± Her heart melts when he tells her to not look. Fine, I won¡¯t look, the most handsome boy in our class is Tang Xiao Tian anyway. Zhang Jing Yu sighs out loud. There is a loyal dog protecting the prettiest girl in the class, I¡¯m going to transfer. When it¡¯s about time to start class, their homeroom teacher walks in. He is a thirty-something year old man. The first thing he says is, ¡°All the girls sit at the front. Who¡¯s the prettiest girl here?¡± Yawang points to herself. The prettiest girl? Is he referring to me? When she sees their teacher nodding his head, she stands up. ¡°My name is Shu Yawang.¡± ¡°Great, then you¡¯ll be the class president.¡± _______________________________________________________________ That statement receives many criticisms from the male students. ¡°Teacher, you¡¯re too biased! Caring about the girls and not the boys!¡± Yawang blushes slightly, it¡¯s her first time that she considers herself pretty. Their homeroom teacher¡¯s last name is Cao and he teaches English. Teacher Cao will not allow the students to speak in Chinese during his class, and his lessons are taught in English only, not caring if the students understands or not. He loves to pick students to answer his questions during his lessons, and he picks Yawang the most. She is going crazy because of this, her English grade is not good, so she struggles when she is picked to answer his questions. Teacher Cao will patiently wait for her to finish answering his question before letting her sit back down. Ever since then, she will study and review the lessons in advance at home two to three times in order to answer his questions. Teacher Cao is very pleased with the results, feeling that this girl is improving steadily under his guidance. By the end of the semester, her English grade rises up and she even earns a 100 on a test! Zhang Jing Yu personally didn¡¯t like Teacher Cao, always calling him a pervert who only picks the girls to answer his questions and even giving a few extra points on their tests. Tang Xiao Tian glares at Zhang Jing Yu when he say it¡¯s nonsense that Yawang got a 100. ¡°It¡¯s nonsense that she got a 100 on the test, that¡¯s a fact.¡± ¡°How¡¯s that a fact? I earned it!¡± She retorts as she grabs a ruler and hits his head with it. ¡°Huh.¡± Jing Yu crumbles up his English test with a score of 59 into the trash bin. ¡°Stupid man, can¡¯t he just give me a passing grade instead of a 59?¡± ¡°Just get a 60 next time.¡± Yawang stands on a chair and starts to draw a girl reading a book with a blue chalk. ¡°Ha! I¡¯ll just get a 59 next time! I love the number 59.¡± ¡°Go, no one is stopping you.¡± She throws down the blue chalk and extends her hand out to Xiao Tian. ¡°The yellow one.¡± _______________________________________________________________ Tang Xiao Tian hands her a yellow chalk from the case. Zhang Jing Yu throws his backpack over his shoulder. ¡°You¡¯re not going to play ball, Xiao Tian?¡± He urges him. ¡°Wait for awhile, Yawang is not done yet.¡± ¡°She still have half a board to go.¡± ¡°Then you go first.¡± Xiao Tian replies back immediately. In his heart, if Yawang needs him, whether it¡¯s something simple like fetching her colored chalks, he will stay with her. Yawang turns her head to face him and smiles. ¡°Go play, I handle it on my own.¡± ¡°But¡­¡± ¡°No buts. Your lady is telling you to go, so go.¡± Jing Yu interrupts, pulling Xiao Tian away by the arm. Xiao Tian turns his head as he is pulled by him. ¡°When you¡¯re done, go to the playground to find me.¡± ¡°I know.¡± She waves goodbye a them. Zhang Jing Yu shakes his head as he walks. ¡°I can¡¯t stand you two. You guys are always together from day to night, aren¡¯t you tired of it?¡± Xiao Tian gives a shy smile, revealing two dimples onto his cheeks. ¡°No, not tired of it.¡± Jing Yu sees his smile and feels a little envious. ¡°I can¡¯t stand you.¡± He says, punching him on the arm. As the two boys quarrel while walking down the stairs, a little boy stands right before them. The little boy raises his head to look at them, locking eyes with Jing Yu. Jing Yu starts tapping against Xiao Tian¡¯s arm. ¡°Yawang¡¯s little brother.¡± ¡°Ah, Xia Mu. You¡¯re looking for Yawang? She¡¯s in the classroom.¡± ¡°I know.¡± Xia Mu says, walking up the stairs. The staircase is very narrow, and Xiao Tian is standing side by side with Jing Yu. When Xia Mu walks up, Xiao Tian shifts to the side to let him go. ¡°Hey, that kid is always so gloomy.¡± Jing Yu comments to Xiao Tian. ¡°He¡¯s like that. He ignores everyone else except for Yawang.¡± _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Psh, hope I won¡¯t become your love rival.¡± Jiang Yu tells Xiao Tian as he spins the basketball. Xiao Tian smiles as he look at his friend in bewilderment. ¡°What do you use your brain for? Having such unusual thoughts.¡± ¡°It¡¯s just a precaution!¡± In the classroom, Yawang continues to draw with the chalks. Throughout the semester, Teacher Cao have given her assignments to do as her position of being the class president. Even though some of the assignments are annoying to deal with, she feels useful. The feeling of being needed improves her grades and mentality. When she hears footsteps from behind, she turns her head, and reveals a smile when she sees who it is. ¡°You came? Didn¡¯t I tell you not to wait for me?¡± Xia Mu walks closer to her, the corners of his lips lifting slightly. ¡°Mmm.¡± ¡°Mmm? What does that mean? Xia Mu, if you don¡¯t talk, you¡¯ll lose your ability to speak.¡± ¡°I want to wait.¡± He murmurs softly. Shu Yawang smiles back. This kid is turning more and more adorable. ¡°Okay, but you might need to wait for awhile. Go do your homework in the meantime.¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± He nods his head and looks around the classroom. The classroom is tidy and clean, with the exception of one desk that has books sprawled on the surface. He walks to the desk and flips to the first page of a book, the first page just consists of Yawang¡¯s name. He sits down and gets his pencil out from his pencil case and starts to draw something under her name. Yawang draws a line over a ruler when she talks to Xia Mu. ¡°Let¡¯s go eat some shaved ice later.¡± There¡¯s no response from him, but she knows he won¡¯t reject her. ¡°I heard the strawberry flavor tastes the best, but the pineapple flavor is not bad either. Later, I¡¯ll get the strawberry, you get the pineapple, and we both share.¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± This kid, he still responds from time to time. In the classroom, all you can hear is chalk sliding across the blackboard. All you can see is young boy sitting in the front row and a teenage girl standing on a chair, both drawing something. _______________________________________________________________ The winter of their junior year arrive early, all of the students are wearing thick coats to keep themselves warm. In the first few days, Yawang bikes to school, shivering under her coat from the cold. She don¡¯t like being cold and ends up taking the shuttle bus to school. Tang Xiao Tian keeps biking to school since his father don¡¯t want him to be spoiled by taking the shuttle bus. At least he didn¡¯t make him walk to school. Tang Xiao Tian wakes up in 6:30 in the morning and starts biking around 6:50. By 7:20 he will see the shuttle bus arriving to the school entrance and Yawang will always pulls down the window and waves her arm out to him. He will bike faster to meet with her, wanting to see more of her smile. Around 7:30 he will go to his classroom with some breakfast that he had bought along the way. He takes off his hat and gloves as he walks towards Yawang. He places the breakfast on Yawang¡¯s desk and push it towards her. ¡°Eat up or it¡¯ll turn cold.¡± She smiles as she takes out the leek pie and soy milk out from the plastic bag. A pale stream of white steam rises up as she tears the pie into strips. She pokes a straw through the soy milk and sips from it. ¡°What about you?¡± ¡°I ate already while biking.¡± Xiao Tian is content looking at Yawang eating, it¡¯s as if he¡¯s the one drinking the soy milk. ¡°Want to drink some?¡± She extends her arm out to Xiao Tian, the straw facing his lips. He lowers his head and takes a small sip, warming his heart. His eyes twinkle as he smiles. Yawang pulls her arm back and takes another sip from the straw. ¡°Did you finish the math homework?¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± Xiao Tian looks at Yawang whose sipping from the same straw that he sipped. His eyes lower to her lips and his heart starts thumping in a fast pace. Her lips are really beautiful. He holds onto his hand, trying to control the urge to touch her lips. ¡°Let me copy it.¡± ¡°Oh, okay.¡± He takes out his math homework from his backpack and hands it over to her. ¡°You should do it yourself.¡± ¡°Can¡¯t do it.¡± She answers with her eyebrows narrowed. She hates math, she can¡¯t understand it. ¡°I will teach you, it¡¯s actually pretty easy.¡± ¡°No, no, I¡¯m an art student. The math section won¡¯t count for me in the college entrance exam so I¡¯m not going to do it. I¡¯m just doing it for the teacher.¡± She lowers her head as she starts getting her books out from her backpack. She takes out her English book and keeps searching for her math book. Tang Xiao Tian picks up her English book and flips to the first page. He sees her name written on top of the page. He likes her handwriting; every semester he will have her write his names on his books. She will have both her books and his books side by side as she writes their names. Xiao Tian will look at her while she writes them. Shu Yawang, Shu Yawang, Shu Yawang. Tang Xiao Tian, Tang Xiao Tian, Tang Xiao Tian. During that moment, it feels like it¡¯s just them two in the world. This feeling of being so close makes him happy. His eyes peer down onto the page and he sees a drawing of a military tank. ¡°Why did you draw a military tank on your book?¡± ¡°I didn¡¯t draw it, Xia Mu did.¡± ¡°Why did he draw a military tank?¡± ¡°Haha, I taught him that. It¡¯s not bad right? I only taught him once and he¡¯s able to draw it so nicely.¡± Xiao Tian¡¯s finger points down to the bottom of the military tank. Xia Mu¡¯s name is written underneath and for some reason, he feels uncomfortable about it. ¡°Why is his name there?¡± His name looks like it was typed onto a computer. ¡°Probably as a signature.¡± Xiao Tian rubs his fingers against the page. For some reason, when he sees Yawang and Xia Mu¡¯s name together, he feels uncomfortable and have the urge to erase his name. ¡°Okay, found it.¡± Yawang¡¯s voice startles him and he looks back at her. She takes out a small, circular plastic medicine kit and opens the case. ¡°Give me your hand.¡± _______________________________________________________________ Tang Xiao Tian extends his hand out with his palm facing up. Yawang pulls his hand and turns it to the other side. His fingers are red from the cold and she places some cream onto her finger before rubbing it against his. ¡°If I don¡¯t take care of you, you¡¯re going to get frostbite this year.¡± She mutters as she rubs the cream onto his fingers. Tang Xiao Tian bites his lips and he can feel the palm of his hand getting warmer and he can¡¯t stand it. ¡°Yawang, Yawang¡­.¡± He speaks softly. Yawang stops with what¡¯s she doing and looks up to him. ¡°What?¡± ¡°I¡­.I-¡± The school bell rings, signalling the class to start. Tang Xiao Tian blushes and pulls his hand away before grabbing his backpack and running to his seat. Yawang looks at him with a smile. Even if he didn¡¯t finish saying it, she knows what he¡¯s trying to tell her. During morning class, the sky starts to sprinkle some snow onto the ground. To children, snow is like a winter¡¯s surprise, the best gift winter can give to them. They can forgive the freezing temperature of winter because of the snow. The students run to the windows and place their faces against them as they look at the snow. ¡°It¡¯s snowing, it¡¯s snowing!¡± Shu Yawang raises her head and looks at the windows. It¡¯s snowing, it¡¯s so beautiful. _______________________________________________________________ Their winter break is a couple of days long, but is soon overtaken by tutorial classes. In the morning they will take language classes, afternoon they will take chemistry and physics, and in the evening they will take specialized courses. Shu Yawang is paralyzed from the amount of classes they¡¯re taking. The teachers start to lecture in a more grave tone and raises their expectations from their students. The amount of assignments increases and the class¡¯ atmosphere turns more gloomy. The students slowly realize they¡¯re reaching the turning points of their lives. Yawang looks over to the right where the high school seniors take their classes. Next year is going to be us. Yawang¡¯s grade improve in her junior year; other than math, she passes every subject, especially in English where she earn above a 90. Tang Xiao Tian is placed third in the final exam and gets to sit in the honors class for senior year. However, after the first two days of their senior year, Xiao Tian moves back to the regular Class Seven. ¡°Xiao Tian, why did you come back? Class One is not good for you? Or are you being bullied?¡± Teacher Cao asks him out of curiosity. Xiao Tian scratches his head as he sits on his seat. ¡°No, Teacher. It¡¯s just that I like Class Seven. I like the class, I like the people, and I like the teacher. I can¡¯t bear to leave, hehe.¡± ¡°No, Teacher, he¡¯s lying. He just misses the class flower!¡± Zhang Jing Yu cries out. All the students smack their hands on their desks as they laugh from Jiang Yu¡¯s outcry. Xiao Tian¡¯s face starts to blush and Yawang covers her mouth to shield her laughter. From that moment, Shu Yawang thought that she and Tang Xiao Tian will be together forever. Together for life, from birth to death, not one second more, not one second less. Chapter 5: Tang xiao tian enlists to the army (pt. 1) Chapter 5: Tang xiao tian enlists to the army (pt. 1) When they were young, they made a wish under the stars. One said they are willing to wait, and one said they will definitely come back. _______________________________________________________________ As they approach their high school graduation, Tang Xiao Tian tells Shu Yawang that he is enlisting to the army. Yawang don¡¯t understand this; with his grades, he can just apply to military school, why bother with enlisting to the army? Uncle Tang once told them: ¡°The men that graduated from military schools are called students and the men that graduated from the army are called soldiers. You have to be trained under the army to be qualified as a real soldier.¡± Yawang purses her lips when she hears the reason. I don¡¯t understand Uncle Tang¡¯s reasoning. Why is he always like this, treating other kids like they¡¯re treasures, but he treats like own kid like this? ¡°Do you want to go?¡± She asks him. He looks back at her and nods his head. ¡°I do, men regret spending two years enlisting to the army, but men who did not enlist to the army will regret it for the rest of their lives.¡± He answers in a serious tone. He wants to enlist to the army before applying to military schools. He wants to be just like his father, so he chose this path for himself ever since he was little. Yawang admires how Xiao Tian have a sense of direction in his future. _______________________________________________________________ She sulks as she looks at the passing scenery in the bus, clutching onto the straps of her backpack tightly. Xia Mu is sitting beside her, and he will sometimes turn his head to looks at her when the traffic lights reflect upon her face. ¡°Hey.¡± He speaks out to her. ¡°Huh?¡± She turns her head and looks at Xia Mu. He still looks the same even if he¡¯s thirteen years old now, having the same emotionless expression with his beautiful facial features. ¡°¡­¡­¡± ¡°Hmm?¡± Xia Mu turns his head. ¡°You didn¡¯t talk much today.¡± Do I usually talk a lot? She usually can talk from when they aboard the bus all the way until they reach their stop. ¡°I¡¯m thinking of something.¡± She leans her head against the seat, her head tilting slightly to look back at him, looking exhausted. Xia Mu turns his head to look at her with the same, emotionless expression. ¡°Xia Mu, do you want to know what I¡¯m thinking of?¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± He answers, signalling his slight curiosity. ¡°You want to know?¡± She teases him as she pinches his cheeks. She likes to pinch his cheeks because that¡¯s the way she can get a reaction from him. ¡°Don¡¯t pinch me.¡± He retorts, tilting his head to get away from her pinching. ¡°If you want to know, let me hug you!¡± She quickly wraps her arm around him and buries her chin onto his hair. ¡°It¡¯s so nice and warm hugging Xia Mu.¡± ¡°You¡­let go of me.¡± He struggles escaping from his embrace. ¡°Alright, I¡¯ll let go.¡± Xia Mu moves back slightly and glares at her after struggling so hard. ¡°Let Jiejie hug you again.¡± She whines as she extends her arm out. She likes hugging Xia Mu, he smells nice and feels soft and warm. ¡°No.¡± He denies as he moves to sit at a different seat. ¡°You don¡¯t want to know what I¡¯m thinking of?¡± She didn¡¯t rush to go after him, instead, she lowers her head and smiles. The bus window displays the black sky with a row of street lamps going backwards as the bus keeps driving. Her head is down while she is staring into space, not noticing that someone is sitting down next to her. That person tugs onto her clothes and she raises her head, seeing Xia Mu¡¯s indifferent expression. ¡°I¡¯ll let you hug me, but don¡¯t mess up my hair.¡± Her eyebrows raise in surprise and she smiles brightly. Xia Mu sees his reaction and backs away, but Yawang already have him in her embrace. She rests her head on his tiny shoulders and closes her eyes. ¡°Xia Mu is so adorable.¡± She murmurs as she ruffles his hair softly. Xia Mu have his back straighten and his lips pursed as she continues to hug him. After a while when Yawang didn¡¯t say anything, Xia Mu speaks up. ¡°You have to tell me what you¡¯re thinking of.¡± Shu Yawang opens up her eyes and smile at him. ¡°I¡¯m thinking of my life goals.¡± _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Life goals?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± Xia Mu didn¡¯t give a response and Yawang didn¡¯t say anything afterwards. To Yawang, she needs to be the one taking the initiative when talking to Xia Mu or their conversation will never flow. However, it¡¯s not the case today. ¡°And?¡± Xia Mu asks out of curiosity. ¡°Huh?¡± ¡°What kind of life goals have you thought of?¡± Yawang lowers her head as she fidgets with her fingers. ¡°I don¡¯t know, didn¡¯t thought of any. Maybe I¡¯m those type of people that will go through their rest of lives with no idea of what they¡¯re doing.¡± Xia Mu lowers his gaze and stays silent, then he raises his head. ¡°That¡¯s good.¡± ¡°Huh?¡± ¡°Those people that holds a strong determination are the most selfish and cruel.¡± When Xia Mu said that, it don¡¯t feel like it came out from the mouth of a thirteen year old boy. Shu Yawang don¡¯t understand what he means by that and asks him. He is unwilling to answer her and stares at a distance with his gloomy eyes. Why did he say that? It¡¯s because his father is that type of person. It¡¯s because of his father¡¯s determination of working in one of the most dangerous jobs that constantly makes his mother worry, and at the end, it costs his life. His mother is also like that, even with his constant begging and crying, she still chooses to commit suicide. Huh, people with strong determination. He thinks in his head as he clenches his hands tightly, his fingernails unknowingly digging into his skin. A hand suddenly places itself on top of his hand and he stops clenching. He turns his head and notices it¡¯s Yawang¡¯s hand. ¡°Xia Mu, we¡¯re home.¡± He slowly separates his hands and look out at the villa. _______________________________________________________________ It¡¯s around nine in the evening and Yawang is drawing in her sketchpad in her room when the phone rang. ¡°Yawang, the phone!¡± Her mom yells out from the outside. ¡°Coming!¡± She puts down her pencil and stands up before walking outside to receive the phone call. ¡°Hello?¡± ¡°Yawang, it¡¯s me.¡± Xiao Tian chuckles through the receiver. ¡°Oh, what¡¯s up?¡± ¡°Oh, nothing.¡± Xiao Tian hastily replies after being taken aback from Yawang¡¯s straightforwardness. Neither of them speaks afterwards. Yawang bites her bottom lip from the awkward silence. ¡°If you¡¯re not going to say anything, I¡¯m hanging up.¡± ¡°Yawang!¡± He blurts out, scared that she will hang up on him. ¡°Yawang, come out. I¡¯ll wait for you in the playground, you have to come.¡± ¡°No, I¡¯m not going.¡± ¡°If you¡¯re not coming, I¡¯m not leaving.¡± ¡°Liar, you¡¯re leaving tomorrow morning anyway.¡± Tomorrow is the day he is enlisting to the army. ¡°Yawang, I¡¯m leaving.¡± He abruptly hangs up on her after. ¡°Hello? Hello?¡± She listens to the ¡°do-do-do¡± tone from the phone before hanging up. How dare he hangs up first? I will teach him a lesson! She turns around to grab her coat and shoes before heading out to the playground, and it turns out, she¡¯s the first one there. She is looking at the stars in the sky when Xiao Tian run towards her. She sees his hair cut into a crew cut, revealing more of his handsome face. He is panting when he stops in front of her. The distance between his house and the playground is five minutes longer compared to her house and the playground so she concludes that he ran in one go. He shows her the practice books he is holding onto. ¡°Here, they¡¯re for you to use when you¡¯re studying.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t need them, I already have a bunch of them at home that I didn¡¯t bother to look at.¡± She rejects while shaking her head. ¡°Yawang, can you not be angry? I¡¯m leaving tomorrow, can you not be angry at me?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not angry.¡± She denies. ¡°Then why were you ignoring me these past few days?¡± Yawang bites her bottom lip and lowers her head. ¡°I¡¯m not angry, I just, can¡¯t bear the fact that you¡¯re leaving.¡± Tang Xiao Tian¡¯s eyes starts to redden and he can feel his heart clenching. ¡°Yawang.¡± She did not raise her head, her dark hair covering her face, making it easier for her tears to stream down. Xiao Tian extends both arms out, wanting to hug her, but he drops them halfway. Suddenly, he crouches down, placing the books onto the ground, and makes a push-up posture. ¡°Yawang, come up.¡± ¡°What are you doing? Your dad is not even punishing you.¡± She laughs from his sudden action. ¡°I¡¯m punishing myself. I made you cry, so I should be punished.¡± ¡°No, it¡¯s fine.¡± ¡°Come up already.¡± Yawang makes a small laugh and sits on top of Xiao Tian¡¯s back. ¡°Alright, do twenty then.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± He starts doing the pushups and Yawang raises her head to look at the stars. She smiles as she recalls the memories of this happening since they were little. It¡¯s been eighteen years and she can¡¯t believe she won¡¯t get to experience this again for the next two years. She knows she don¡¯t want him to leave, but¡­ Tang Xiao Tian is not done with twenty pushups yet, but Yawang stands up and leans down to have him stand up. ¡°Go, I¡¯ll wait for you.¡± She tells him as her eyes reddened. Xiao Tian pulls her towards him and hugs her tightly. They made a wish under the stars; one said they are willing to wait, and one said they will definitely come back. _______________________________________________________________ He is leaving for the 8am train the next day, Sunday. Yawang waits for him downstairs, smiling when she seems him in his military uniform and hat with a huge red flower pinned his chest. She suddenly recalls the military slogan, One person becomes a soldier, brings pride to their family. She fixes her hair as he approaches her. ¡°Hehe.¡± Xiao Tian smiles as he adjusts his uniform. This is not his first time wearing a military uniform, he always takes his dad¡¯s and wear them ever since he was a kid. He will walk around in front of the mirror with the huge military uniform on his body and his dad¡¯s helmet covering half his face. Now, he finally have his own uniform. He straightens his back and salutes to Yawang. Shu Yawang laughs and pats his shoulder. ¡°Not bad, not bad.¡± His father appear behind him and kicks his shins. ¡°You fool, stop posing.¡± ¡°Dad!¡± Xiao Tian yelps, rubbing his shins with his hand. Always embarrassing me. His dad glares at him then turns his attention to Yawang. ¡°Uncle is going to get the car, wait here.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± She smiles while nodding her head. Xiao Tian steps forward with his lips pursed and holds onto Yawang¡¯s hand. ¡°You don¡¯t have to see me go.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t want to see you cry.¡± Yawang¡¯s heart feels warm and touched. She forcefully smiles back and said, ¡°But I want to see you go.¡± He holds onto her hand tightly, not knowing what to say. He liked this girl ever since they were little, there are too many things to miss, too many emotions warped in his mind, and he can¡¯t just say it¡¯s because he likes her. So what is this feeling called? This sweet, blissful feeling that warms your heart, but also having a bit of regret although he don¡¯t feel sad, because he knows, that she will wait for him. He knows that she feels the same way. Tang Xiao Tian pulls her towards him and wraps his arms tightly around her. Yawang wraps her arms around his back and leans her face onto his chest. He can smell the sweet scent of her hair and she can hear his heart beating. _______________________________________________________________ That summer, they were eighteen years old. That summer, they were separated. That summer, their hug as each other¡¯s first love, will constant appear in their dreams during the years he was away. Yawang didn¡¯t see him go that day, because she don¡¯t want to see him cry. She stands by the main entrance as Xiao Tian climbs up his dad¡¯s military vehicle. He rolls the car window down and looks out to her. She gives him a smile, her eyes starting to turn red when she tries to prevent herself from crying. He smiles back, his eyes also turning red when he fights his tears back. The engine is rumbling as it prepares to go, and that¡¯s when they fully realize they¡¯re going to be apart. They are not certain with the future, but they believe that they will see each other again. When the vehicle starts to move, Yawang unconsciously walks two steps forward. Xiao Tian thrusts his body out of the window and pulls the flower that is pinned onto his uniform before flinging it out to her. The bright, red flower tumbles in the air as it heads straight towards her direction. She instantly catches the flower and looks at Xiao Tian. ¡°Yawang, you have to wait for me until I come back! Wait for me!¡± He shouts as the vehicle drives farther and farther away. She looks at the flower in her hands and starts to play with it. ¡°It¡¯s only two years.¡± She chuckles. She looks up from the flower and stares straight ahead as the vehicle disappears from her sight. _______________________________________________________________ After Xiao Tian is gone, Yawang partakes in the fine arts professional examinations from a local university and an university in another province and have successfully pass with flying colors. The humidity in mid-June is unbearable; the fans in the classroom providing little assistance as it ripples across the pages of the textbooks. Teacher Cao enters the classroom and decides to give a break to the mentally exhausted students. ¡°Let¡¯s rest for a bit, it¡¯s almost our turn taking the graduation photo. Everyone meet up outside of the school building.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± The students chant back. There is nothing that excites them at this point, they just want to get the last test over with. Yawang looks up from her books and thinks about how time pass so fast. It just seems like yesterday she was looking at the other graduating classes taking their photos and now, it¡¯s their turn. She stands in the first row with twenty-nine handsome male students standing behind her. She smiles before the camera, leaving the most radiant smile imprinted onto the photo. Years later when the male students flip through their yearbook in their high school reunion, they will point at Yawang. ¡°She¡¯s our class flower, isn¡¯t she pretty?¡± Yawang requests an extra copy of the photo so she can send it to Xiao Tian. He places the photo in his treasured journal, feeling regretful that he left before he have the chance to take the graduation photo with the class. The last section of the college entrance exam they have to take is integrated science which covers physics, chemistry, and biology. As the students walk out of the door, study notes are shredded and thrown to the ground. They can finally express their joy of completing the exam after being pressured from it for three years. ¡°We¡¯re free!¡± The students shout as they run out of the building. Yawang walks down the stairs and fixes her hair as she exhales a sigh of relief. She takes out her study notes from her backpack and dumps them into a nearby trash bin. I will never want to see you again. As she walks out from the building, her parents run towards her with refreshing cold drinks and a towel as they greet her. ¡°How is it? Are you tired? Are you hungry? How did you do? Are the questions hard?¡± Her mom asks. She shakes her head in reply. English and humanities are okay, but she feels iffy in the integrated science portion. She sees her parents¡¯ anxious looks and rubs her nose. ¡°I think I did well.¡± ¡°Good, good, you worked hard. Let¡¯s go, Dad will buy you something good to eat.¡± He wraps his arm around her shoulder and gives it a gentle pat. Her daughter finally takes her studies seriously in the last two years of high school and that is considered a miracle for him. She leans her body slightly in her father¡¯s embrace as her mother opens the car door. She sees Xia Mu sitting inside as well. ¡°You came too?¡± ¡°Uncle told me to.¡± ¡°Oh,¡± Yawang drinks some water from her bottle. ¡°So you were forced to come.¡± Xia Mu shoots her a glare and she rubs his head back. ¡°I¡¯m kidding, I know you¡¯re worried about Jiejie, that¡¯s why you came.¡± Her mother turns her head back from sitting in the shotgun. ¡°Yawang, I made your favorite dishes; kelp and ribs soup, mushroom with pork, and cucumber with pork slices.¡± ¡°Yes! I¡¯m starving.¡± ¡°Xia Mu, come over and taste Auntie¡¯s cooking.¡± Xia Mu stares back her blankly, not nodding nor shaking his head. Her mother looks back at Yawang and she tugs onto the hem of his shirt gently to get a reaction from him. ¡°Okay.¡± Her mother happily turns her head back and discuss tonight¡¯s plan with her father. Yawang inches closer to Xia Mu and whisper to him, ¡°Xia Mu, when adults talk to you, you need to answer back. It¡¯s rude if you ignore them, understand?¡± Xia Mu lowers his gaze to the floor and turns his head to the side. Argh, this child. If only he can be more straightforward. _______________________________________________________________ Once they arrive to Yawang¡¯s home, Yawang goes straight towards the couch and turns on the TV while retrieving some grapes that are placed on top of the coffee table. Her parents goes to the kitchen to start preparing the food. Xia Mu follows Yawang and sits on the couch. She hands over a grape to him, but he shakes his head. ¡°You don¡¯t want it? It¡¯s sweet.¡± He extends his palm to accept the grape. ¡°Will you go to an university in another city?¡± He suddenly asks. Yawang spits out the seeds from the grapes into the trash bin. She gives the question some thought before answering back. ¡°I don¡¯t know, if my score is high enough, I can get into the Art Institute in T City.¡± Xia Mu turns his grape as he lowers his head. ¡°Do you think you scored high enough?¡± She smirks and hooks her finger to tell him to come closer. He inches closer and she whispers in his ear, ¡°A pretty good chance.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± He smiles and eats the grape. Wah, so sour! He shoots a glare at Yawang who is laughing hard on the couch. ¡°Haha, stupid. You got fooled!¡± He turns his head in annoyance. ¡°You¡¯re so detestable.¡± He mutters. When Yawang sees him getting annoyed, she think it¡¯s adorable and proceeds to hug him. ¡°Xia Mu, let Jiejie hug you.¡± ¡°No.¡± He quickly stands up from the couch before she can wrap her arms around him. Yawang quickly follows behind and there is a chasing spree in the house. Yawang¡¯s dad looks out to see what the commotion is all about and smiles when he sees them two playing. Xia Mu is becoming more lively, Yawang is great with children. Haha. _______________________________________________________________ Before taking the entrance exams, Yawang swears to sleep for three whole days after she takes them. However, she can¡¯t seem to fall asleep afterwards. She lies on her bed as she looks over the answer key her teacher provided to her with her own answer key. She first looks over the integrated science section and finds out that she got many of the questions wrong. She turns less confident and bites her thumb nervously as she flips through the answer keys. After awhile, she sits up from her bed and opens the top drawer of the bedside dresser. It consists of many envelopes and she takes all of them out. They are all letters from Xiao Tian, a total of sixty-eight letters after she counts them. She takes out the most recent one and starts to read from it. ¡°Yawang, it¡¯s now 9:31pm and I just finished playing basketball in the military playground. I missed you, so I started to write this letter.¡± Yawang smiles from the first two lines. This is how Xiao Tian likes to write, he will first write down the time and place he¡¯s at, telling her what¡¯s he doing. Everytime she reads the beginning, she can imagine the scenery where he writes his letters. In the light night wind with the sun starting to set, a young man sitting on the bleachers of the playground writing in his journal. ¡°Did you know? Our team won in the basketball game. Big Brother is too powerful, he got 45 points on his own!¡± Big Brother, a name she keeps on seeing appear in his letters over and over. He and Xiao Tian enlists in the army at the same time, but since he¡¯s the oldest out of all the recruits, he¡¯s referred as the Big Brother. Xiao Tian will write how fast Big Brother can run, how many pushups he can do, and how he stands up for the new recruits when they are bullied. Yawang sighs when she reads those compliments, she feels that her Xiao Tian is being stolen from this Big Brother. ¡°Yawang, the special forces will come and choose the top recruits next month. There¡¯s only ten spots, but I will give my all for it. I came all the way here to be in the special forces, I will not give up this opportunity.¡± She smiles at his passion and determination in the letter. Lucky guy, he¡¯s doing what he likes. ¡°Yawang, how did you do on the exams? Are the questions hard? I¡¯m worried for you. You don¡¯t know how much I wanted to take the entrance exams and go to university with you. I feel so contradicted, at first I came here with no hesitation, but after separating from you for three months, I start to regret my decision. I keep on the dreaming the scene where you are holding to the red flower I threw out and you¡¯re crying. Were you crying that day, why do I keep on dreaming that you cried? Yawang, do you miss me? I really miss you.¡± She covers her face with the letter and lies back down on the bed. This idiot, why can he be so frank in the letters, but he is not able to say them in person? How can I not miss you? Chapter 5: Tang Xiao Tian enlists to the army (pt. 2) Chapter 5: Tang Xiao Tian enlists to the army (pt. 2) Three days later, Shu Yawang receives her results from the college entrance examinations. She earns a 438 in liberal arts and a 282 in specialized comprehensive test in arts. Her scores allow her to enroll in T Univeristy. Teacher Cao looks at her acceptance letter then looks at her. ¡°You¡¯re just six points away from getting into S University.¡± She shrugs her shoulders and takes her acceptance letter back. ¡°T University is alright, it¡¯s closer to home, so I get to save the money from dorming.¡± Teacher Cao nods his head in agreement. ¡°T University is good, continue to study hard.¡± ¡°Teacher, admit that you¡¯re biased. Both of us got admitted to T University, but you scold me and praise her!¡± Zhang Jing Yu complains. ¡°So what? Normally you can score at least 150 on the math section, but on the actual exam you scored a 110, if I don¡¯t scold you, who will?¡± Their math teacher who is standing nearby agrees with Teacher Cao. ¡°You embarrassed me, did you cheat on my exams?¡± ¡°Come on, the questions on the exams are harder. Someone scored just a 5 on it!¡± ¡°It¡¯s not counted for me though.¡± Shu Yawang smiles smugly. Zhang Jing Yu grabs his acceptance letter. ¡°Whatever, at least I don¡¯t need to take it again.¡± ¡°Yes, agree!¡± Shu Yawang extends her hand out for a handshake. Jing Yu extends his and they both shake hands. ¡°Please take care of me well, my future university friend.¡± They both walk out of the teacher¡¯s office laughing, heading towards the internet cafe and staying there until nighttime. _______________________________________________________________ In the evening, Yawang tells Xiao Tian that both she and Jing Yu got accepted to the same university when he telephoned her. ¡°That¡¯s good that Jing Yu is there to look after you. Now, I¡¯m not as worried.¡± ¡°Look after me for what?¡± ¡°Ah¡­nothing.¡± ¡°Alright, so you don¡¯t trust me.¡± She mutters out, twirling the phone cord with her fingers. ¡°No, not at all.¡± He denies. ¡°Huh, I¡¯m mad.¡± ¡°Yawang¡­¡± He tries to say something to convince her, but someone in the background cuts him off. ¡°Hey, the guy in the front, your five minutes are up, hang up already.¡± In the new recruits¡¯ dormitory area, there are six telephones. They can only use it in the weekends during six to ten in the evening. To be fair, the recruits agree to not have phone conversations longer than five minutes. ¡°Yawang, don¡¯t be mad at me, I definitely do not-¡± ¡°The guy in the front, it¡¯s been six minutes!¡± ¡°Okay, I¡¯m hanging up.¡± Yawang listens to the do-do-do tone while chuckling and shaking her head. This poor guy, he can¡¯t even use the phone. Is he a soldier or a prisoner? She hangs up and is about to walk back to her room when the phone rings again. She picks it up immediately. ¡°Hello?¡± ¡°Hello, is this Yawang?¡± The voice on the other line is a man, his voice sounds low and melodic to her ears. ¡°Who are you?¡± ¡°Huh.¡± The man chuckles. She raises her eyebrows from his reaction. ¡°I¡¯m Big Brother.¡± ¡°Big Brother?¡± ¡°Yeah, Xiao Tian wants me to lend one minute to him. Seeing how unfortunate he looks, I let him use it.¡± After he finishes speaking, Yawang hears some static before Xiao Tian speaks. ¡°Yawang, I was just spitting words out carelessly. It¡¯s not that I don¡¯t believe you, I just want Jing Yu to take care of you in my place-¡± ¡°Okay, okay, I¡¯m not mad at you, I was just teasing.¡± ¡°Hey, I¡¯m not afraid of you getting mad at me.¡± Yawang smiles, imagining how Xiao Tian¡¯s face looks like. ¡°You idiot.¡± ¡°Huh, I¡¯m hanging up then. Big Brother needs to use the phone.¡± ¡°Oh, what¡¯s Big Brother¡¯s name?¡± Yawang asks out of curiosity. ¡°He¡¯s called Qu Wei Ran.¡± ¡°Qu Wei Ran?¡± She repeats his name. ¡°His name sounds nice.¡± ¡°Well, sounds better than mine. Anyway, I¡¯m going to hang up now. Big Brother is waiting for the phone.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± She laughs before hanging up. Xiao Tian listens to the do-do-do tone, not wanting to hang up. ¡°How did you guys change the topic to me?¡± Qu Wei Ran asks. Tang Xiao Tian turns his head and smiles back. ¡°Yawang asked me for your name.¡± ¡°Oh, and then?¡± ¡°She said your name sounds nice.¡± He gives a smile. ¡°Her name sounds nice too.¡± ¡°Yes, yes.¡± Xiao Tian¡¯s eyes twinkle as he nods his head. _______________________________________________________________ The summer of her senior year: she don¡¯t have any homework to do, no tests to study for, no nagging from her parents, nothing at all. It should be one of her most blissful summers in her life, but because of Xia Mu, it¡¯s a hectic summer. She can¡¯t believe her eyes when she looks at his report card. It¡¯s all red and he did not earn higher than a 50 in any of his classes. She flips the report card back and forth to make sure it¡¯s his report card and not someone else¡¯s. She lifts her head and looks at the boy in front of her. This handsome, dark-haired boy, no matter how you look at him, he looks like a smart child. ¡°Xia Mu, your report card looks more worse than mine when I was in junior high.¡± Xia Mu stares at her blankly. She turns frustrated and slams the report card onto the table. ¡°What kind of attitude is this?! How can your grades be this horrible?! Looks is not everything, at least have some brains too!¡± Xia Mu glares at her, and she glares back. ¡°I never paid attention in class nor read any of the textbooks, but I still have higher grades than you. Look at this, how can you get a 40 in Chinese? Let me look at your test so I can see how you can have such a low grade.¡± Xia Mu slowly takes out his exam papers from his backpack. Excluding the multiple choice section, his exam papers are blank. ¡°Did you copy the answers to the multiple choice questions?¡± He shakes his head. ¡°Then how did you get everything correct?¡± It¡¯s not only in Chinese, but for his other classes, he answered every question correctly in the multiple choice sections in the exams. ¡°I guessed.¡± ¡°Guessed?!¡± She glares at her angrily and throws down the papers onto the table before pulling Xia Mu to have him sit onto a chair. ¡°From today on, I¡¯m going to tutor you. See if you dare to not listen to me!¡± He looks at her and purses his lips, nodding his head silently. This marks the beginning of the two month-tutoring. Every day in the summer, she will go to Xia Mu¡¯s home to tutor him. They eat together and take afternoon naps together. Xia Mu feels he is getting closer with Yawang during the summer; he will sometimes start the conversations. Sometimes when Yawang is too tired, she will hand him a test to do while she takes a brief nap on his bed. He lays his head onto his palm, looking at the mirror on his desk. The mirror reflects her body, her dark, long hair spread all over his white bedsheet and her silent breathing comforts him. When her eyelashes start to flutter, he quickly shift his eyes onto the test paper. She walks up behind him while fixing her hair and looks at his progress. When she sees the blank test paper, her beautiful eyes flashes anger. ¡°You did not write anything at all!¡± She grabs a red pen on his desk and draws out six whiskers onto Xia Mu¡¯s face. She sees his bored expression and gives a satisfied smile. ¡°The next time I catch you slacking off, I¡¯ll draw a turtle on your face.¡± When she tutors Xia Mu, she is more serious compared to when she is studying for her classes. When she explains, she will draw on her notebook at the same time in case it¡¯s too hard for him to understand. He will sometimes look up to her face and just stares at her. When she catches him daydreaming, she will pinch his cheeks. ¡°Daydreaming again?! Did you understand everything I just said?¡± He nods his head. ¡°Fine, then do these.¡± She quickly writes out a couple of complicated math problems, thinking that he will not know how to solve it and she will be able to draw a turtle onto his face. He lifts up his pencil and looks at the questions, then lowers his head while writing out solutions. This boy, he¡¯s not stupid at all! Even I can¡¯t figure out how to solve these problems. Fine, I admit I¡¯m bad at math, but¡­Yawang looks at him in suspicion. ¡°Hey, don¡¯t tell me during the test, you¡­¡± Xia Mu looks up at her. ¡°Are too lazy to write out the answers to the other test questions?¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± His eyes shift back and forth in denial. ¡°Don¡¯t lie to me.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not, you teach well.¡± ¡°Huh.¡± Yawang is stunned from his reply, then smiles widely. ¡°I guess I have the talent of being a teacher! Alright, let¡¯s go to the next section!¡± Xia Mu looks at her smile widely then lowers his head, the corner of his lips lifting up to a smile. _______________________________________________________________ At the end of the summer, Xia Mu improves dramatically. He scores a 100 in every test Yawang throws out to him and she treats him to a huge meal afterwards to compliment him. However on the first day of school when they are taking a test to see which class they will be assigned to, he only completes the multiple choice section. Yawang¡¯s body shakes in anger when she sees Xia Mu¡¯s test grade. ¡°You completely wasted my time!¡± She throws his test back at him and turns around to leave. She may not notice it since she is angry, but Xia Mu¡¯s face crumpled for a second. Yawang walks back home and starts to pack her luggage. Their university is holding a freshman orientation, and the destination this year is in Yunnan. It¡¯s going to be two weeks long, but they¡¯re going to be spending one week alone on walking. There are four majors in the arts departments, a total of eight classes. All of the young men and women starts to interact with each other after the first two days. Since Yawang is a commuter student, she is not really close with the other students. It¡¯s been two months since school started, but she can¡¯t remember any of her classmates¡¯ names. She don¡¯t mind though, she¡¯s not planning to make friends in college. Yawang thinks that the heart is small, it can only hold up a limited amount of people. If she¡¯s close with the friends she made in college, her high school friends will slowly move out from her heart, and she don¡¯t want that to happen. She wants to live with the friends she have right now, with no changes. She sits near the window and read the short novel in her hands. When they reached Yunnan, everyone grouped together in pairs or three¡¯s and she will stand alone, drawing on her sketchpad. It¡¯s a pretty cold December in Yunnan, it¡¯s really windy, and her sketchpad will shake from the wind. Yawang protects herself with a thick hat. The orientation that is half a month long soon ended, and many couples are formed then. Love, for some people, is pretty easy to obtain. She ignores them and continues to draw with her black pen onto her sketchpad. On the first page of the sketchpad, she titled the drawing, ¡°Taking You to See the Scenery Together¡±- Shu Yawang. She stuffs the drawing into a manila envelope and writes down Xiao Tian¡¯s address before mailing it in Yunnan. When the wind picks up again, she raises the collars of her jacket and looks out to the front. The wind blows her hair, making it look like it¡¯s dancing in the wind. She smiles lightly when she imagines his reaction when he receives her mail. When Yawang arrives home, it¡¯s already eleven in the evening. Her mother takes her luggage for her. ¡°How¡¯s Yunnan? Was it fun?¡± Yawang nods her head. ¡°Mmm, pretty fun. But I¡¯m so tired.¡± ¡°Go take a shower first, Mom will heat up some food for you.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± She walks to her room and rummages for some clean clothes to wear when her mother shouts from the outside. ¡°Go call Xia Mu. He¡¯s been looking for you everyday. When I asked him what he¡¯s doing, he won¡¯t answer me. Such a weird child.¡± ¡°It¡¯s eleven already, he¡¯s probably asleep. I¡¯ll call him tomorrow.¡± She goes to sleep right away after taking a shower and eating the heated leftovers. _______________________________________________________________ The next morning, Yawang opens her eyes slowly and have a blurry vision of Xia Mu standing in front of her. ¡°Xia Mu, your dark circles got more worse.¡± She smiles softly. Xia Mu sits by the corner of her bed, holding onto her bedsheet tightly with both hands. ¡°Next time, I¡¯ll complete everything.¡± He says as he turns his head away. ¡°Complete what?¡± Yawang have no idea what he¡¯s talking about. ¡°The test.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± Her eyes brighten when she realizes what he¡¯s talking about. This kid, coming over to apologize. Is he scared that I¡¯m going to ignore him? So adorable! ¡°Xia Mu, you¡¯re so adorable. Let Jiejie give you a hug.¡± Xia Mu quickly gets off the bed, making Yawang hugging the air. ¡°Xia Mu, you haven¡¯t seen me for half a month, don¡¯t you miss me?¡± Xia Mu purses his lips, not shaking nor nodding his head. ¡°You don¡¯t miss me?¡± He turns his head to the other side. ¡°No, you don¡¯t even call me.¡± And he said he don¡¯t miss me! Such a huge grudge he¡¯s holding¡­ ¡°Haha!¡± Seeing Xia Mu acting like this makes Yawang happy. Xia Mu glares at her and turns to leave, but Yawang quickly grab a hold of him. ¡°Aw, don¡¯t be mad! Jiejie is wrong.¡± ¡°You¡¯re not my jiejie.¡± ¡°Then I¡¯m your what?¡± Xia Mu looks at her, and spits out this word coldly. ¡°Auntie.¡± ¡°You brat.¡± She pinches both of his cheeks and threatens him. ¡°Try to call me auntie again.¡± ¡°Auntie, auntie, auntie.¡± He forcefully spits out. Yawang nods her head in reply. ¡°If I don¡¯t teach you a lesson today-¡± Her mother who at that time passes by her room and sees what she¡¯s doing. ¡°Yawang! Don¡¯t bully Didi (little brother)!¡± She turns her head to her mother. ¡°He¡¯s not my didi.¡± Her mother looks at the two children in surprise. Are they in a fight? ¡°He¡¯s my nephew.¡± Neither her mother nor Xia Mu says anything. ¡°What? It¡¯s not funny to you?¡± Yawang laughs. Her mother ignores her and goes to retrieve some money out from her coat pocket. ¡°Your dad and I are going out today, here¡¯s some money for food.¡± Yawang retrieves the money happily. ¡°Okay, go have fun.¡± Her mother wears her coat and heads out the door. Yawang puts the money into her wallet and counts how much money she have in total. ¡°Nephew, let¡¯s go out. Auntie will buy some candy for you.¡± Xia Mu lets out a short laugh. They both leave the house around noon, Yawang wearing her gloves before getting her bicycle. ¡°Nephew, let Auntie take you.¡± Xia Mu glares at her and grabs onto the handlebars, pushing the bicycle out. Yawang laughs from behind, she didn¡¯t realize that he is a bit taller than her now. This kid, he grows up so fast! Almost 1.7m tall, if I were to fight him again, I think I¡¯m going to lose. ¡°Nephew, now that you¡¯re taller than Auntie, you better not bully me.¡± Xia Mu sits on the seat and looks at Yawang. ¡°Get on the bike.¡± He says coldly. ¡°Okay, thank you nephew.¡± She sits on her side in the back, holding onto the sides of Xia Mu¡¯s waist with both hands. Xia Mu¡¯s mischief makes the bike wobble as he tries to steer, and Yawang shouts at him. ¡°Steady, steady!¡± When the bike finally stabilizes, Yawang lets out a sigh of relief. ¡°Nephew, your biking skills are not that great. Let Auntie take you.¡± ¡°Shu Yawang!¡± He yells out. ¡°What is it, nephew?¡± ¡°Stop calling me nephew.¡± ¡°But nephew, you call me auntie, so of course I will call you nephew.¡± Xia Mu bites his lower lip. ¡°I¡¯m not going to call you auntie.¡± ¡°That won¡¯t work. Once an auntie, forever an auntie. You can¡¯t deny it, nephew.¡± Xia Mu is so angry that he can¡¯t say anything. He steers the bike as fast as he can with Yawang sticking her tongue out behind. Haha, you want to beat me? There¡¯s no chance, kiddo. _______________________________________________________________ When they arrive to the city, there¡¯s a huge crowd of people walking around. Since it¡¯s a few days before Christmas, all the stores have all their Christmas decorations up, making the city more lively with the bright colors. Yawang brings Xia Mu to KFC, taking the coupons out from her bag. ¡°What do you want to eat, nephew?¡± Xia Mu gives her a warning glare. ¡°Shu Yawang.¡± She knows that Xia Mu is close in getting angry at her so she gives him an apologetic smile. ¡°Go order.¡± He lowers his head and orders the food. Yawang pays at the counter and they eat their hot lunch once their order arrives. Right next to KFC is S City¡¯s largest shopping center, so Yawang decides to bring Xia Mu in there to look around. She will go grab beautiful clothes for Xia Mu to try on, hats and scarves included. She walks around the aisles like a moving Barbie doll, putting all the beautiful clothes onto Xia Mu. She will clap her hands when she sees his transformation, making the saleswomen attracted to Xia Mu. After spending the whole afternoon walking, they take a break in the shopping mall benches. She leans her body onto Xia Mu while eating her ice cream. Right across their bench is a jewelry store, and the store display is filled with shiny, sparkling accessories. The one that catches Yawang¡¯s attention is a necklace of two fishes kissing. In between the two fishes is a small crystal bead. She walks up to the window to take a closer look at it. Being a Pisces herself, she loves the style of the necklace, but she gasps when she sees the price tag. ¡°Why is it so expensive?¡± ¡°What are you looking at?¡± Xia Mu asks, walking towards the window. ¡°Nothing.¡± She shakes her head as she looks away from the necklace. It¡¯s so pretty, I wonder will the necklace still be here by the time I receive my Lunar New Year¡¯s money. Xia Mu glances at what she¡¯s looking at before, the necklace capturing his attention. She eats the last bite of her ice cream from the cup and taps Xia Mu¡¯s shoulder. ¡°Let¡¯s go.¡± He nods his head and follows behind Yawang, turning his head to look at the necklace one last time. During the ride home, Yawang leans herself onto Xia Mu¡¯s back, wrapping her arms around his waist and closing her eyes. The person in front smiles and pedals slower and slower. _______________________________________________________________ Yawang picks up the calendar that is sitting on top of her bedside drawer and counts the days. 1, 2, 3, there¡¯s 391 more days. Ah, no it should be 390 more days. She corrects herself, marking today¡¯s date with a blue pen. She places the calendar back and rolls around on her bed. Then, she grabs her cellphone and starts texting. Only 390 more days. After a short while, her phone beeps and she goes to take a look. Started the countdown already? She smirks and starts typing back. I miss you, I really want to see you. Really? You really want to see me? Yes! It¡¯s true! She nods her head while typing her reply. Okay, when there¡¯s an opportunity, Xiao Tian and I will both see you. Her smile stiffens when she read the latest text. She forgot that the number she is texting to is Qu Wei Ran¡¯s. Three months ago when both Tang Xiao Tian and Qu Wei Ran both got chosen to join the special forces, the department disciplines them really strictly, making their recruits have little to no communication to the outside world. Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father, who missed his son so much, bought him a cellphone and secretly sended to his son through a close friend working in the department. Since it¡¯s breaking the rules, the phone will be locked in a drawer during the day, and he will use it at night after all the lights are out. Since he and Xiao Tian are very close, he lets him use his phone to contact Yawang. Whenever Yawang texts him, it¡¯s always Xiao Tian who replies back, so it¡¯s a shock for her when it¡¯s Wei Ran that replies instead. Oh, it¡¯s you. Haha. Xiao Tian got called by the instructor, so I¡¯ll return the texts in his place. ¡°Oh.¡± What does he mean by returning the texts in his place? He shouldn¡¯t do it in place of Xiao Tian, making me express my emotions to the wrong guy, so embarrassing¡­ Are you mad? Why are you not saying anything? I have nothing to talk to you about. After her text, there¡¯s a long pause. She scratches her head, thinking if whether she is too harsh at him. Why are you not saying anything? Are you mad? No, it¡¯s just that I have nothing to talk to you about. She twitches the corner of her lips as she reads his reply. Such a stingy man. Chapter 6: Christmas date (pt. 1) Chapter 6: Christmas date (pt. 1) She likes his hugs: they feel warm and firm, clean and reassuring. She wants to close her eyes and stay in his embrace forever. On Christmas Day, Shu Yawang spends her day like any normal day; drinking some milk while looking out to the corridor. It¡¯s really cold today, so she decides to not ride her bicycle. Instead, she waits for the school bus that picks up underage students. She is the only one in her department that is thick-skinned enough to ride the school bus. She steps up the familiar bus steps, and all the students in the bus recognize her. They all smile and greet her. ¡°Good morning, Yawang jiejie.¡± She will wave back and rub their heads while heading towards the back of the bus. She sits in the last row and falls asleep, hearing the shouts of the young students once in awhile. Suddenly, the whole bus is silent, making Yawang opening her eyes in curiosity. She sees a young man walking up the steps, his body covered with a large black coat. He lowers his head, his fringe covering his eyes so you can only see his handsome nasal bridge and sharp chin. She don¡¯t know why, but the warmth of the bus seems to dip down when he enters. He lifts his head up slightly, his dark circles evident for everyone to notice. He starts to walk down the aisle, his footsteps echoing in the bus. When he gets to the last row, a girl smiles radiantly at him and pulls him to her side. ¡°Did you eat breakfast yet?¡± Yawang asks him with a yawn. Xia Mu shakes his head. Yawang retrieves two buns out from her bag, and hands a cream bun over to him. ¡°For you.¡± He shakes his head. She narrows her eyes at him. Xia Mu purses his lips, then takes the bun from her. He slowly uncover the packaging and reluctantly bite into it. ¡°Are you eating poison? Eating it so forcefully.¡± She laughs. ¡°I don¡¯t like eating sweet food.¡± He murmurs. Yawang looks at him in disbelief. It seems like he¡¯s holding a grudge with that tone of his. With that emotionless expression too, it¡¯s so cute! I really want to hug him! Xia Mu lowers his head while eating the cream bun. He sticks his other hand into his coat pocket, feeling the edges of a small, hard box. He bites into the area where there¡¯s very little cream. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Today is Christmas.¡± ¡°Uh huh, what about it?¡± She asks, getting another bun out from her book bag. It¡¯s a dried pork bun, she hands that over to Xia Mu and takes his cream bun. He looks at the dried pork bun in his hands, then looks at Yawang who is eating his cream bun. The hand in his pocket is slowly rising up, his fingers wrapped around the box tightly. ¡°It¡¯s Christmas, and?¡± She asks as she bites into her bun. It¡¯s rare when Xia Mu starts a conversation. His hand starts to rise up from his pocket, revealing the corner of the box. It¡¯s a green box with no wrappings, simple yet elegant. ¡°Umm¡­¡± His palms start to sweat and he can feel his cheeks start to burn. He is about to pull out the box when the bus suddenly stops. They arrive to his school, and Xia Mu stiffly looks out the window. ¡°Xia Mu, we¡¯re at your school now.¡± Yawang nudges him. ¡°Oh.¡± He loosens his grip and the box drops back down to his pocket. He regretfully picks up his bookbag and stands up, walking down the aisle. He makes a couple of steps before turning his head back, looking at Yawang. She looks back at him and calls out. ¡°Xia Mu, what time do you get off from school today?¡± ¡°5:40.¡± Yawang nods her head in satisfaction. ¡°Okay, Jiejie will pick you up.¡± Xia Mu looks at her suspiciously. Yawang laughs, revealing a slight evil grin. ¡°It¡¯s Christmas, how about watching a movie with jiejie?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t like to watch movies.¡± She looks at him in disappointment. My mom got me two movie tickets for Christmas Day and all my friends have plans already, who else is going to watch movies with me? ¡°Remember to pick me up.¡± He says before walking towards the door. ¡°Didn¡¯t you said you don¡¯t like watching movies?¡± He turns his head back. ¡°I said I don¡¯t like watching, didn¡¯t say I won¡¯t go.¡± He replies with a slight smirk. Yawang notices, when Xia Mu is in a good mood, he will give a slight smirk. It¡¯s as if he is trying to suppress his smile. She looks at his back and murmurs to herself. ¡°You brat, why can¡¯t you be more straightforward? You obviously want to go.¡± _______________________________________________________________ Yawang walks into her classroom when she arrives to school. There¡¯s only around twenty people in her class. As the weather turns colder, less people come to school. When the school bell rings, her professor walks into the classroom and starts marking attendance with her head down. Even though there¡¯s only twenty people in the classroom, all forty-five students are marked present. Yawang tries to stifle her giggles when people answer to other students¡¯ names behind their books and changing their voice. She starts to wonder whether she should dorm next semester, so she don¡¯t need to wake up so early. Halfway through lecture, her phone starts to vibrate. She cuts the call and texts the person back. What are you doing? I¡¯m in class. Hehe, miss class flower, do you have any plans for tonight? She reads Zhang Jing Yu¡¯s text and wants to laugh at his playfulness. Yeah, going to watch a movie with a handsome boy. Her phone starts to vibrate again and she cuts the call. What are you doing? It can¡¯t be. Xiao Tian only left for a bit and you¡¯re moving on already? Screw you, I¡¯m just joking about it and you believe in it? That¡¯s good, let¡¯s meet up this evening. I haven¡¯t seen you much in school and I start to miss you. Quit grossing me out, what is it that you want me to help you? You know me so well, can you come out around 4? I need your help in something. In what? Marriage. Yawang looks at his reply in shock. Don¡¯t tell me this guy is interested in a girl and wants me to help out. She ponders at that thought for a moment, since she is meeting Xia Mu at 5:40, she decides to help out Jing Yu. Okay, I¡¯ll contact you later. _______________________________________________________________ She didn¡¯t receive a call from Jing Yu until around 4:30pm. That guy tells her to meet him in an excited tone. After she hangs up on him, she packs away her stuff and grabs her bookbag before leaving. She walks leisurely to the park where Jing Yu tell her to meet him in. The view of the park in the winter is indescribable; it¡¯s just so pale and white. She walks a few more steps forward, hearing the rustling of the leaves she steps with her feet. She turns her head and looks around and narrows her eyebrows slightly. This guy tells me to come here and yet he¡¯s not here yet? She takes her phone out and looks for Jing Yu¡¯s number. Before she presses the call button, she feels someone standing behind her. When she is about to turn her head to look, a large hand covers her eyes. ¡°Zhang Jing Yu.¡± She said calmly. The person behind her did not reply back, but the hand gives a slight shake, it¡¯s as if the person is trying to stifle back their laughter. ¡°Zhang Jing Yu, do you want to get beat up?¡± She asks, raising her hand to pull down the hand that is covering her eyes and turning her head back. The angry words in her mouth is about to explode until she sees who¡¯s standing behind her. She is shocked, she can¡¯t believe her eyes. It¡¯s a tall and skinny man wearing a fitted green army uniform, displaying her favorite smile. ¡°Yawang.¡± He¡¯s still like this; pulling her close by holding onto her hand and calling her name softly. ¡°You¡­you¡­why is it you?¡± She is so excited, but don¡¯t know what else to say, so she grips onto his hand tightly, their palms pressed against each other¡¯s. ¡°Hehe, surprise!¡± Jing Yu shouts out from the back. ¡°Do you still want to beat me up, Yawang?¡± ¡°Haha, next time you ask for my help, I¡¯ll know that it¡¯s Xiao Tian coming back.¡± Zhang Jing Yu shakes his head in disagreement. ¡°No, no. Next time if I ask you for help and you show up all excited until you realize that Xiao Tian did not come back, you¡¯ll beat me the crap out of me.¡± ¡°How can I? Am I that type of person?¡± She asks, smiling sweetly at him. Jing Yu gives a her look, Aren¡¯t you? Yawang ignores his look and tugs on Xiao Tian¡¯s arm. ¡°How did you come back? I thought new recruits don¡¯t have vacations?¡± ¡°Mmm, the army lets us go deliver some things in the military zone of T City. We were supposed to stay in T City overnight after we finish delivering, but I want to see you, so I secretly sneak out.¡± ¡°Oh, I see.¡± It¡¯s about an hour driving distance from T City to S City. ¡°Then don¡¯t you need to leave right away?¡± ¡°Mmm, I¡¯m going to take the 4am train back to T City, then go back with Big Brother in 7am.¡± ¡°So you can only stay for one night?¡± She looks at him, her hands unconsciously rocking his hand. Tang Xiao Tian don¡¯t get a chance to reply back with Jing Yu interrupts them. ¡°You can do a lot of things in one night, hehe.¡± He pats Xiao Tian¡¯s shoulders afterwards, giving him a meaningful look. Xiao Tian hurriedly pats Jing Yu¡¯s hands away, his face steaming red. ¡°You¡­you stop with these nonsense.¡± ¡°Hehe, what nonsense? Don¡¯t tell me you haven¡¯t thought about it, look at how red your face is.¡± Jing Yu elbows him, enjoying the teasing. Xiao Tian¡¯s face turns more red and he looks at Yawang while shaking his head. ¡°Yawang, I didn¡¯t¡­¡± ¡°Oh really?¡± Jing Yu interrupts. ¡°Oh! Right, Shu Yawang, you¡¯re not attractive enough!¡± ¡°Do you really want to get beaten up?¡± She walks forward, pulling Xiao Tian away and glaring at Jing Yu. She sticks out one finger and starts shaking it up and down. ¡°Go, leave, get away you third wheel. We do whatever we want tonight, we don¡¯t need your instructions.¡± I¡¯m the only one that can make Xiao Tian blush. Besides her, no one else have the permission to do so. ¡°Wow Yawang, you¡¯re too much! You think you¡¯re the only that misses Xiao Tian? I was thinking of eating dinner with him tonight!¡± ¡°Xiao Tian won¡¯t go.¡± ¡°Xiao Tian.¡± ¡°Xiao Tian.¡± Both of them look at Xiao Tian expectantly. Xiao Tian raises his eyebrows and looks at them. ¡°Yeah, I¡¯m not going.¡± Jing Yu shakes his fists. How can he?! ¡°Brother, you disappoint me! Don¡¯t contact me ever again.¡± He babbles out, looking hurt. ¡°See you.¡± Xiao Tian replies back with a smile. ¡°You guys are ruthless, I will remember this!¡± Jing Yu¡¯s face crumples with a hurt expression before leaving. However, he¡¯s actually happy that he don¡¯t need to spend money for tonight¡¯s dinner. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Are we too extreme?¡± Yawang asks, looking at Jing Yu¡¯s back warily. ¡°No, he¡¯s not that fragile.¡± Xiao Tian knows his friend too well, Jing Yu is probably happy right now that he don¡¯t need to pay for tonight¡¯s dinner. ¡°Oh, then I will be more ruthless next time.¡± Yawang said, rubbing her chin and displaying an evil grin. ¡°Stop bullying him.¡± ¡°Who tells him to bully you first?¡± Xiao Tian just remembered what Jing Yu had said earlier and starts to blush again. Yawang looks at his flushed face. ¡°What are you thinking of?¡± ¡°Nothing.¡± He answers, rubbing his nose, trying to conceal his lie. ¡°You haven¡¯t been thinking of anything? What are we going to do tonight then? Stay out here?¡± He gives an awkward smile. ¡°Let¡¯s go to somewhere warm.¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± Yawang agrees, pulling his hand to lead him to their school library. Besides the gymnasium, T University¡¯s library is the second most beautifully designed building. There are a total of nine floors; the first three floors are self-study areas, the fifth to seventh floor* have reading rooms, and the eighth to ninth floor are computer areas. Ever since school started, Yawang pass by this grand library many times, but never actually went inside. She tugs Xiao Tian to an empty self-study room to sit. They sit across from each other near the windows, looking out to the paths that the students are taking to get to other buildings. The winter wind will blow some fallen leaves up to the air, and students will pass by while laughing, but none of these catches their attention. They only see each other; when he talks, she listens, when she talks, he listens. *The number four is known to be an ominous number in Chinese culture so it¡¯s most likely that the fourth room of the library is empty. Chapter 6: Christmas date (pt. 2) Chapter 6: Christmas date (pt. 2) He talks about his interesting anecdotes. She talks about her observations. He talks about his thoughts. They keep on talking so much that maybe even when the sun rises the next day, they¡¯re still not done. His hand is holding onto hers underneath the table. Her lips curves up with a smile; she likes his intimacy, his warmth, his smell, his handsome face. She closes her eyes, her eyelashes trembling slightly from nervousness. She quickly moves her head, and before he can react, she kisses him on the cheek. He stares back in shock, looking at her with a trace of blush on his face. She lowers her head when she sees his expression and yells at him in her head. You fool, fool, fool. She raises her head when she feels him tugging onto her hand. He looks at her with twinkling eyes, and places his hand on her shoulder, his handsome face approaching closer to her, ready to kiss her. Yawang blocks him with a flushed face. ¡°Don¡¯t do it here.¡± Even though there¡¯s no one in the self-study area, there are a lot of people walking around outside, she don¡¯t want the people to notice them. However, Xiao Tian refuses. She blocks his lips with her hand, so he sucks onto her palm. She lets go from the sensitivity and he hastily plants a kiss onto her cheek, not letting go until he feels content. Yawang glares at him afterwards and he rubs his nose, smiling shyly back at her. Sure enough, men can¡¯t withstand these types of actions, not even Tang Xiao Tian. _______________________________________________________________ Yawang¡¯s phone starts to ring, singing out a personalized tune that signals it¡¯s Xia Mu who¡¯s calling. Once she hears the ringtone, she realizes that she completely forgot about their date. ¡°Hello, Xia Mu.¡± She picks up his call with a guilty conscience. ¡°It¡¯s six.¡± He answers coldly with a resentful tone. ¡°Oh, it¡¯s six already. Hehe, I forgot to look at the time.¡± ¡°Come over, I¡¯m in school.¡± Yawang looks over to Xiao Tian before answering. ¡°I have something to do tonight, how about tomorrow night?¡± He is silent for awhile. ¡°I¡¯m not free tomorrow night.¡± ¡°Then¡­how about the night after?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not free that night either.¡± ¡°Wow, you¡¯re so busy. Never realized that.¡± She lets out a soft laugh. How can he be busy? He don¡¯t go anywhere else besides school. How dare he say he¡¯s busy? She can sense that the person on the other line is angry, so she softens her voice. ¡°I really have something to do tonight, I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°What is it?¡± He asks softly. ¡°Hehe, Xiao Tian came back, so I¡¯m going to stay with him.¡± She laughs awkwardly to the phone. She is about to say something after, but Xia Mu already hung up on her. Yawang looks at her phone in disbelief. Is he mad at me? ¡°Who was it?¡± Xiao Tian asks her. ¡°Xia Mu.¡± ¡°What happened?¡± ¡°I said I will take him to watch movies tonight, but then¡­¡± She nudges his shoulders, ¡°I need to stay with you.¡± ¡°Then go, this kid is not easy.¡± He hears things about Xia Mu once in awhile, knowing how Xia Mu likes to stick to Yawang. He didn¡¯t feel jealous about it, he just thinks that Yawang is a very loveable person, everyone loves her when they meet her, Xia Mu being no exception. ¡°Then what are you going to do?¡± ¡°We can go together, we just need to buy an extra ticket.¡± ¡°Smart!¡± Yawang gives him a thumbs-up for approval. Xiao Tian chuckles out a laugh, bringing her thumb down with his hand and stuff both of their hands together in his pocket. They look at each other, an indescribable feeling of warmth and sweetness oozing out from their glances. She calls Xia Mu back, and he didn¡¯t pick up until she calls him for the third time. ¡°Xia Mu, I decided to go watch the movies with you tonight.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± Just an ¡°oh¡±? He¡¯s not even being straightforward, surely he must happy right? ¡°Xiao Tian gege is also coming.¡± Do, do, do, do¡­..Yawang looks at her phone in shock. This guy, he¡¯s only straightforward when he¡¯s mad! ¡°What did he say?¡± Xiao Tian asks. ¡°Hung up, didn¡¯t care.¡± She answers while shaking her head. ¡°What did you do to him that makes him dislike you so much?¡± Xiao Tian thinks for a moment, then shakes his head. ¡°Who knows? He might have a crush on you.¡± Yawang laughs so hard that she hits against the table. ¡°That joke is too funny.¡± ¡°Alright, since he¡¯s not coming, let¡¯s go together.¡± Xiao Tian throws Yawang¡¯s backpack over his shoulders and interlaces their hands. ¡°Let¡¯s go eat first, then watch the movies.¡± Yawang nods and smiles as they walk, it¡¯s Christmas Eve, and it¡¯s not easy for him to come here, of course I will spend it with him. It¡¯s better if Xia Mu doesn¡¯t come, he¡¯ll be a third-wheeler. At this moment, her phone rings again, and hearing from the ringtone, it¡¯s Xia Mu calling. She picks up the phone and within two sentences, he hangs up on her again. ¡°What did he say?¡± ¡°Have us pick him up.¡± She grumbles, pouting her lips. ¡°This bipolar brat.¡± _______________________________________________________________ This date turns out to be very strange; Xia Mu don¡¯t even need to do anything, he just needs to stand by the side and his icy, cold appearance will turn the atmosphere cold. No matter how much Yawang and Xiao Tian do to lift up the mood, they¡¯re defeated by his cold and gloomy temperament. The two will exchange looks and rubs their noses, regretting picking him up. Xia Mu unconsciously walks between the two, and they all look like three wooden statues; eating stiffly, watching the movies stiffly, and walking out on the streets stiffly. Yawang constantly gives Xia Mu signals that he can go home, but it¡¯s as if Xia Mu don¡¯t understand her words and just looks at her blankly. Yawang helplessly sighs, it¡¯s already nine in the evening, and the amount of people out on the streets starts to diminish. The temperature is getting lower, and a winter wind suddenly greets them, making Yawang tremble from the cold. Xiao Tian stops and turns his body slightly to look at her. ¡°It¡¯s late, let me take you home.¡± Yawang buries her neck, her nose red from the cold, and asks as she stomps on her frozen feet. ¡°What about you? Are you going home?¡± He shakes his head. ¡°I¡¯m not going, if my dad knows that I secretly came back, he will rip my skin off.¡± ¡°Then you¡¯re just going to roam around the streets until tomorrow morning?¡± ¡°Why would I? I will take you guys home first, then I¡¯ll go find Jing Yu and crash in his dorm for the night.¡± Yawang stretches her hand out to grab onto Xiao Tian¡¯s arm and shakes it side to side. ¡°Don¡¯t go, it¡¯s not easy for you to come back. I¡¯ll stay with you in the train station waiting area tonight.¡± ¡°But, how can you not go home?¡± ¡°I can find an excuse to lie to my mom.¡± Xiao Tian ponders for a bit, then shakes his head. ¡°No, I¡¯m leaving at four tomorrow morning, I feel uneasy leaving you by yourself outside.¡± ¡°It¡¯s okay, I¡¯ll just stay in the waiting area until the sun is up.¡± She don¡¯t want to separate from him, even standing here idly with him for one more minute is good enough for her. Xiao Tian looks at her, he can¡¯t bear to reject her, he don¡¯t want to reject her. He smiles brightly and nods his head vigorously, he wants to stay with her longer as well. Yawang sees his compliance and smiles back, their hands clasped together, and you can see the sweetness of the two from their eyes. _______________________________________________________________ Xia Mu lowers his gaze and looks at their interlaced hands, his expression turning more cold than before. Yawang turns her body and looks at Xia Mu. ¡°Let me take you home first.¡± ¡°No need.¡± He replies back calmly. ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°I know how to get home.¡± His voice is soft, but it also sounds tired at the same time. Yawang looks at Xiao Tian, not knowing what to do. He laughs and said, ¡°Let him go on his own. Xia Mu is fifteen already, you don¡¯t need to protect him as often.¡± ¡°That¡¯s right, Xia Mu is already turning into a man.¡± Yawang tugs onto Xia Mu¡¯s jacket sleeve. ¡°Take the Road 16 bus, and don¡¯t miss your stop, okay?¡± Xia Mu raises his head and looks at Yawang, giving her a slight nod before walking towards the bus stop. They all wait in front of the bus stop together and when the bus arrives, Yawang gives Xia Mu a slight push from the back. ¡°The bus is here.¡± The bus¡¯ automatic doors open up and Xia Mu climbs in, seating himself at a window seat. He sees Yawang waving at him and he looks back at the two, with his hands stuffed into his pockets, his right hand injured from the constant rubbing of the box. He didn¡¯t turn his head back to face the front, letting the scenery outside pass by him without a care. That evening when he return home, he takes the box out from his pocket and open it. Under his desk lamp, he can see the beautiful sparkles the silver necklace have reflected from the light, the two adorable fishes displaying happiness as they kiss. He looks at it for awhile, then throws it in the trash can along with the box, staring ahead blankly. After awhile, he stands up and retrieves the box and necklace from the trash can. He looks at it while biting his lip, then stores it in his drawer. _______________________________________________________________ Yawang gives her a mother a lame excuse; her friend is currently in the hospital and her family is not from S City. She wants to help her friend out by spending the night over there. Her mother believes her, probably because she¡¯s always been a good girl. She tells Yawang to take care of her friend well and to be careful. When she hears her mom giving her permission, she quickly hangs up, fearing that she will slip up. Xiao Tian waits for her results nervously, and she slyly gives him the victory sign to tell him it¡¯s successful. ¡°Yawang, Yawang.¡± He speaks her name excitedly as he happily envelops her into a hug. Her face flushed a bright red from the sudden embrace, her freezing body automatically turning scorching hot, and her heart beating in a quickened pace. ¡°Xiao Tian.¡± She speaks softly. ¡°Hmm?¡± ¡°I like how you hug me.¡± She likes his hugs: they feel warm and firm, clean and reassuring. She wants to close her eyes and stay in his embrace forever. He tightens his arms around her, burying his face in her hair, whispering in her ear softly. ¡°Then I¡¯ll hug you like this the whole night, until the sun rises.¡± Her heart starts to beat even faster, she bites her lips and closes her eyes before nodding softly to his words. Xiao Tian¡¯s brain delivers a triumph sound; he don¡¯t know how to describe this feeling, the passion of love burning in his heart. The young adults don¡¯t know how to control their passion. They are in love, deeply in love. They want to kiss, want to hug, want to claim the other person as their own. They yearn for hugs, yearn for being their love, yearn for being deeply in love. _______________________________________________________________ The two nervous and shy young adults stand in front of the desk counter inside a cheap motel. They wait for the receptionist to check their ID¡¯s and follow his lead to a room. After they hear the door click shut, they are a bit more relieved. Their hands are still interlaced together tightly, looking at the room they¡¯re staying for the night. The room consists of a twin sized bed with a white mattress cover. It looks old and not clean, but can¡¯t describe where it looks dirty. The two stands by the corner of the bed with their flushed faces, not daring to look at each other. ¡°Sit¡­have a seat.¡± He tells her nervously. Yawang nods with her flushed face, walking to the side of the bed and preparing to sit. However, Xiao Tian tells her to wait. She looks at him and sees him taking off his army jacket. Her face turns even more red and she takes her eyes away from him. When he sees her reaction, he quickly explains to her nervously. ¡°No, no¡­.¡± He repeats as he places the jacket over the bed. ¡°The bed is dirty.¡± She looks at him stunned, then laughs. Seeing his reaction, she wonders how he manages to bring her over to the motel in the first place. Xiao Tian¡¯s face turns even more red from her laugh, he rubs his nose and sits on the chair beside the bed. She sits on his jacket that is over the bed. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Want to watch TV?¡± He asks awkwardly. ¡°Don¡¯t want to.¡± She shakes her head and yawns. ¡°Tired?¡± He asks warmly. She nods her head. ¡°Then go to sleep.¡± Yawang rubs her eyes that keeps on drooping down.¡±You¡¯re not going to sleep?¡± ¡°I¡­I will look over you.¡± ¡°You idiot!¡± She laughs out, taking off her shoes and socks. Her hands go up to take off her jacket, and Xiao Tian quickly turns his head away. I still have three layers of clothes underneath, do he really need to do that? She drapes her jacket over her body and covers the jacket with the motel¡¯s blanket before turning her head to look at Xiao Tian who¡¯s wearing his army uniform. ¡°Are you cold?¡± The room have no ventilation, this guy is frozen from giving away his jacket. He licks the corners of his lips and shakes his head. ¡°No.¡± Right after he said that, he sneezes twice. She looks at him angrily. ¡°Do I need to invite you? It¡¯s not like we never slept together before!¡± They used to sleep together before they turned seven years old. He chuckles slightly and walks over to the bed, taking off his shoes and socks. He uncovers a corner of the blanket and slips himself in, accidentally bumping into Yawang¡¯s feet. Her feet feels icy cold. He narrow his eyebrows and asks, ¡°How can your feet feel so cold?¡± Yawang tilts her head to the side and shakes her head. ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± He extends his legs and reaches for her feet, warming them up with his. Yawang looks at him and smile sweetly, extending her arms out coyly. ¡°My hands are cold too.¡± He places her hands inside of his and rubs them gently. They don¡¯t know who leans closer first, but the two slowly hug each other in a tight embrace. He gives a light kiss on her face, just like the one in the afternoon, quick and instant. She tilts her head and looks at him. He can¡¯t help it, but to kiss her again, kissing on her beautiful eyelids and curved lips. They are all quick kisses, but somehow, they turn more passionate. Her body starts to turn into a sponge as he presses his body on top of her. He exerts pressure to his kisses and his hand starts to slide down. Her heart is racing and she don¡¯t know how to react, she can only look at him. Just when the atmosphere in the room starts to heat up, Yawang¡¯s cellphone starts to ring. They jump and look for the phone like two children getting caught doing something bad. At the end, Xiao Tian finds her phone under the covers and throw it towards her. She takes the phone and have her back face towards him and face flushed. She takes in a deep breath before answering the call. ¡°Hi, mom.¡± ¡°Where are you?¡± ¡°I¡¯m¡­in the hospital.¡± ¡°How dare you lie to me?! Wow, I can¡¯t believe it, you are lying to your mom now! Where are you?!¡± Her mom roars out from the other line. ¡°I¡­.I..¡± She don¡¯t know how to answer after being flustered from her mother¡¯s words. ¡°Are you with Tang Xiao Tian?¡± She knows that she got caught, so she confesses. ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Come back home right now! How old do you think you are? How old are you?! Where are you?! Tell me right now!¡± She pulls the phone away from her ear due to the yelling and waits for her mom to finish yelling at her before giving her the address of the McDonald¡¯s near the motel. Her mom huffs at her, telling her to wait in the store, her father is going to pick them up. _______________________________________________________________ Yawang looks at Xiao Tian and tells him nervously, ¡°Crap, we¡¯re screwed. I never seen my mom this mad before.¡± Xiao Tian is also scared, but he comforts Yawang with a smile. ¡°It¡¯s okay, just blame it all on me. Tell them that I didn¡¯t let you go home, it¡¯s all my fault. If they want to hit someone, hit me. If they want to yell at someone, yell at me.¡± They both wear their jackets slowly and fix up their clothes. Yawang fixes her hair under the dim lighting of the motel. They are not able to tell that they did anything wrong until they enter McDonald¡¯s that have bright lighting. Yawang¡¯s lips which have been kissed with such passion, her eyes that displays lust, and her face that shows a hint of blush; anyone can tell what they have been doing. Xiao Tian looks at Yawang and starts to blush. He feels scared, yet happy. He¡¯s scared that his dad will yell at her, but he¡¯s also happy that he gets to be intimate with her, it was like he was in a dream. He¡¯s even more happy that he can finally announce their relationship to the adults. If her mom wants him to take responsibility, he will definitely say yes. ¡°How can you laugh in this situation?¡± Shu Yawang glares at him. He scratches his head, continuing to laugh. Within a short while, a military jeep rolls up in front of McDonald¡¯s. The first person who departs from the jeep is Uncle Tang. When Xiao Tian sees his dad walking towards them, he immediately straightens his back and stands up straight, a bit afraid of looking at his dad¡¯s ferocious face. Immediately follow Uncle Tang is Yawang¡¯s dad, her dad¡¯s expression don¡¯t look well either. Without a word, Uncle Tang kicks Xiao Tian with one foot, making Xiao Tian stumble for balance. He didn¡¯t even regain his balance yet when Yawang¡¯s dad throws a punch at him. He falls down from the blow and drags down the chair behind him. ¡°No, Uncle, don¡¯t hit him.¡± Yawang pleads with her widened eyes. ¡°You army deserter! How dare you leave your post!¡± His dad yells as he points his finger at him. ¡°I¡­I didn¡¯t¡­¡± Xiao Tian tries to explain. ¡°You did not report nor apply for authorization to leave your post so you¡¯re an army deserter! If it was during the time of war, you would have been caught and executed!¡± His dad yells as he kicks him again. ¡°Why did you leave your post? Just because you missed a girl? Such an useless soldier!¡± Yawang watches as she stands by the side, her tears streaming down her face. Her dad pulls her out in anger, ¡°You still know how to cry, such an embarrassment! Get in the car, I¡¯ll have your mom deal with you when we get home!¡± She holds onto her dad¡¯s arm and begs him, ¡°Dad, dad, tell Uncle Tang to stop hitting Xiao Tian.¡± Her dad ignores her and drags her to the jeep, replying back angrily, ¡°If he was not Old Tang¡¯s son, I would have killed him! How dare he kidnapped my daughter, that little bastard!¡± _______________________________________________________________ That evening, both families are in an uproar. Yawang¡¯s mom have Yawang kneel in the court playground the whole night and Uncle Tang have Xiao Tian run laps around the playground the whole night. They like to be together, so they have them spend the night together outside. The next day, Yawang catches a cold from kneeling outside and Xiao Tian gets sent back to his post. Yawang, who is resting in her bed, gives a pitiful look to Xia Mu who is visiting her. Xia Mu sits by her bedside and eats the apple her mom washes for him. ¡°You deserved it.¡± Yawang didn¡¯t have to energy to beat him, so she gives him a strong glare. ¡°You brat, after how well I treated you, you said I deserved it?¡± ¡°Stupid.¡± ¡°What did you say?¡± ¡°Immodest.¡± ¡°I¡¯m going to kill you.¡± She pinches his face with as much strength she have. Her mom enters with her medicine and glares at Yawang. ¡°Yawang, you are bullying Xia Mu again? I¡¯m going to withhold your allowance for the next two months!¡± ¡°No, mom, I¡¯m wrong, please don¡¯t withhold my allowance.¡± In addition to the four months¡¯ worth of allowance she lost from not returning home last night, she¡¯s going to lose half a year¡¯s worth of allowance. Compared to Yawang¡¯s situation, Xiao Tian¡¯s is not any better. He is currently being held in solitary confinement and waiting for the troop¡¯s decision in whether or not he can remain a soldier. The couple¡¯s first budding love have been hurled to the basket, and from there, they don¡¯t dare to have their budding love sprout. Chapter 7: This man is dangerous (pt. 1) Chapter 7: This man is dangerous (pt. 1) Qu Wei Ran asks: ¡°Do you really hate me?¡± Shu Yawang nods her head: ¡°Yes, I really hate you.¡± Qu Wei Ran looks at her with a seemingly distressed face: ¡°But what should I do? I¡¯m attracted to you.¡± _______________________________________________________________ Time seems to fly by unknowingly; with a blink of an eye, Shu Yawang is graduating from college, Xia Mu is in high school, and Tang Xiao Tian enrolls into a military academy in Xi¡¯an. Everyone¡¯s life is seemingly going down in a smooth path. Even though Yawang and Xiao Tian are in a long-distance relationship, they are still very much in love. Xiao Tian don¡¯t have much vacation days, so they will spend each and every second together whenever he comes back. Shu Yawang already decided to follow Xiao Tian wherever he is positioned to be stationed in, she don¡¯t want to continue dealing with the pain of separation. She shakes her head to get those thoughts out of her way, right now, she should be thinking about getting a job. Through a classmate¡¯s connection, she is hired into a landscape company. Yawang majors in interior design, and it have no connections with landscaping whatsoever, but it¡¯s hard to find a job, so she accepts the offer. During that time, the company recently wins the bid of the Go-Green construction project of a highway. Everyone in the company is extremely busy from the project, Shu Yawang being no exception even as a rookie. _______________________________________________________________ Today, the manager lets her go to the construction site to retrieve the blueprint from the Hyde Industrial Group they will be collaborating with in the project. She goes to the office from the directions her manager gives to her and knocks on the door before opening it. The man sitting behind the desk looks busy, with his head buried down in piles of paper. ¡°Hello, I¡¯m here to retrieve the blueprint for the No. 3 Highway.¡± The man shuffles the files before propping the blueprint and a receipt on the table. ¡°Sign.¡± She retrieves the blueprint and signs her name onto the receipt. She thanks the man and turn her heels to walk out of the office, but got stopped by the man¡¯s voice. ¡°Shu Yawang.¡± She turns her head and sees the man lifting his head. He have a handsome face, the pair of glasses making him look mature. He gives her a light smile. ¡°Tang Xiao Tian¡¯s Shu Yawang?¡± ¡°Who are you?¡± ¡°Who do you think?¡± He asked with a crooked grin. He runs his long finger across Shu Yawang¡¯s signature before getting up from his seat. He is really tall, and as he walks closer towards Yawang, she feels like she¡¯s being cornered. She takes one step back as she narrows her eyebrows, trying to lengthen their distance. They are no more than three feet away from each other. He lowers his head, the sunlight reflecting his glasses, making her unable to see his expressions, but she can feel his playfulness. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Still can¡¯t guess who I am?¡± He leans down, trying to close their distance. Yawang feels really uncomfortable, it¡¯s as if something is preventing her from breathing. She shoots him a sharp glare and yells out, ¡°How am I suppose to know who you are?!¡± ¡°You do know.¡± He chuckles, leaning down again. She panics, but she don¡¯t want him to see that. ¡°Qu Wei Ran?¡± The man smiles, his smile displaying a mysterious aura. He lifts his hand and tilts his head, reaching for her hair. Strands of her long hair runs through his finger as he brings his hand down. He rubs the ends of her hair with his fingers. ¡°Nice to meet you, Yawang-ah.¡± Shu Yawang¡¯s heart skips a beat and her face flushes. Ever since Tang Xiao Tian left, very little men will stay this close to her. With this kind of a distance, it¡¯s hard to keep your head straight. She walks back a step, pulling her hair away from him. ¡°Nice to meet you too, Mr. Qu. I¡¯m sorry, I need to bring the blueprint back, excuse me.¡± She turns her heels and is about to walk out when he stops her by blocking the door. She do not stop in time and hits her face against his chest. She jumps back in surprise and he catches her by holding her steady by the waist. After she regains her balance, she yanks his hand off from her and gives him a glare. ¡°What are you doing?¡± His eyes bring a smile and the corners of his lips lift up slightly. ¡°I just want to bring you back.¡± She walks back a few steps more and turns her head to the side. ¡°There¡¯s no need, I can take the bus.¡± ¡°Why are you putting your guard up on me?¡± He asks in a playful tone. ¡°I am not.¡± ¡°Can I call you?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t have my phone with me.¡± ¡°I know your number.¡± ¡°You won¡¯t be able to reach me.¡± Qu Wei Ran suddenly laughs, it¡¯s not loud, but it¡¯s clear. Yawang raises her head and looks at him before leaving. This time, he do not block her way, but she can feel him staring at her as she walks away. She do not dare to turn her head back and it¡¯s not until she exits the building that she exhales a sigh of relief. She do not expect meeting Qu Wei Ran here, she remembers Xiao Tian telling her that before Wei Ran enlists to the army, he was a junior in a brand name university. He is pretty popular in school, from freshmen to seniors, there is not one girl he haven¡¯t dated in those classes. After he¡¯s tired from dating, he takes a break from school and enlists in the army. After he finish his military service, he goes to back to school to receive his college diploma and now helps out in the family business. Wow, such a small world! She don¡¯t know why, but she don¡¯t like Qu Wei Ran. She don¡¯t like how he smiles at her, don¡¯t like how he looks at her, she just thinks, this man is dangerous. _______________________________________________________________ In one hot day in September, Yawang struggles to find the construction site after getting off from the bus, it takes her nearly half an hour to find it. She hands over the blueprint to the manager, and it¡¯s not even been five minutes that the manager tells her to come out from the air-conditioned room and go to the construction site. She uses a tape measure to accurately measure the distances and uses a white chalk to draw out the lines, splitting the sections and marking each tree species with a different sign. There are barely any women working out in the construction site other than the aunt that cooks for them. The only other woman working that day is Xiao Xue from the accounting department. Yawang realizes that she tends to be in places where there are more men than women. The workers treat Yawang with enthusiasm, striking up a conversation with her as they dig the soil to plant the trees. Yawang have a nice temperament, always answering back to their questions with a smile. After working for a day, she¡¯s already so exhausted that she don¡¯t want to move. ¡°Yawang, let¡¯s go, we¡¯re done.¡± Xiao Xue calls for her by the door with her bag. Yawang nods her head and grab her things, asking Xiao Yue as she follows her. ¡°Xiao Xue, do we still need to go to the construction site tomorrow?¡± Xiao Xue is older than Yawang by two years and have been working in the company for at least a year. ¡°Mhm, we have to go until the construction is complete. What is it, you¡¯re tired?¡± She asks as she turns her head to look at Yawang. Yawang smiles sheepishly. ¡°A little.¡± ¡°Your job is exhausting. Most of the landscape designers are men, isn¡¯t it disadvantageous for women?¡± ¡°It¡¯s alright, I think it¡¯s pretty interesting.¡± Yawang laughs in reply. The two walks down the street when Yawang¡¯s phone starts to ring. It¡¯s an unknown number, but she didn¡¯t hesitate to pick it up. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Hello?¡± ¡°Hi, Yawang.¡± She recognizes the voice to be Qu Wei Ran¡¯s. She wants to hang up, but feels it will be rude of her to do that. ¡°What do you want?¡± ¡°I just want to treat you to dinner.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry, I just got out from work and I¡¯m really tired, I want to rest at home.¡± ¡°Oh, is that the case?¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± ¡°Then can I take you home?¡± Right after he said that, a navy blue sedan drives up to her. The driver lowers the window and Qu Wei Ran looks at her from inside. Shu Yawang hangs up in annoyance. ¡°How did you get here?¡± ¡°I¡¯m just passing by.¡± He answers smoothly with a kind smile on his face. ¡°Get in the car, I don¡¯t want the sun to burn the delicate skin of these two beautiful ladies.¡± Xiao Xue looks at Yawang with desperation, she don¡¯t want to walk for another half an hour to reach to the bus stop. Yawang narrows her eyebrows, she¡¯s really tired and don¡¯t want to walk anymore as well, but she really don¡¯t want to get in the car. Qu Wei Ran gets out of the car and opens the door for them like a gentleman. Xiao Xue thanks him before going in the car. Wei Ran arches his eyebrows to Yawang, waiting for her to go in. She hesitates for awhile, and decides to go in. It¡¯s been a long day and she¡¯s exhausted. Qu Wei Ran sits on the driver¡¯s seat and quickly starts his car, dropping Xiao Xue off first. _______________________________________________________________ When it¡¯s just them two in the car, Wei Ran will look at Yawang through the rearview mirror. She will avoid his glance and he will smile whenever she does that. They reach the front gates of the military compound, and Yawang thanks him before grabbing her bag and stepping out of the car. He also follows her out and blocks her way. ¡°Is there something else you want?¡± ¡°Let me walk you home.¡± ¡°There¡¯s no need, you can¡¯t just enter here leisurely.¡± She dips her head down out of respect and bids good-bye. He grips onto her as she walks away and laugh. ¡°Do you really don¡¯t want to eat dinner with me?¡± Shu Yawang tries to pry his hand away from her, but he¡¯s gripping onto her tightly. ¡°Let go!¡± ¡°Don¡¯t be so rushed, there¡¯s something I need to tell you.¡± ¡°What is wrong with you?! Always moving and touching.¡± Yawang is infuriated with him, and she is about to call the security guards out when a bicycle is heading straight towards Wei Ran. He reacts quickly and immediately let go of Yawang to have the bicycle drive pass through them. However, the bicycle stops abruptly in front of Wei Ran, hitting his body harshly. ¡°You brat, do you know how to ride a bicycle?¡± Qu Wei Ran asks as he glares at the teenager that separates him and Yawang with his bicycle. The teenager who is wearing a summer school uniform didn¡¯t even bother to look at him. He glances over to Yawang and said, ¡°Get on.¡± Yawang looks at the teenager and smiles brightly. ¡°Xia Mu.¡± Xia Mu, a teenager with a face that is more handsome than a Korean star, lifts the corners of his lips into a smile. He adjusts the bicycle to have Yawang sit behind him. She grabs onto his clothes and he kicks his shoe against the ground before biking. At that time, Qu Wei Ran laughs out of frustration. Xia Mu turns his head back and shoots him an icy, cold glare. ¡°Such a fierce glare.¡± Qu Wei Ran comments as the two bike away from him. He rubs his finger against his lips. ¡°Interesting, really interesting.¡± _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Who is that guy?¡± Xia Mu asks. Shu Yawang stifles out a yawn and answer back lazily. ¡°A despicable guy.¡± ¡°And yet you let him drive you home?¡± ¡°I have no choice, I¡¯m so tired from work, too lazy to walk.¡± She rubs her legs and thinks out loud, ¡°If only the military compound have a bus¡­¡± ¡°You wish.¡± He sneers in reply. ¡°Ah, such a bitter life.¡± She gives a long sigh. ¡°How so?¡± ¡°Why do I have to work with the worker uncles after I graduated from college?¡± She rubs her nonexistent tears away. ¡°Everyday, my face looks towards the soil and the sun shines onto my back, digging and planting, digging and planting. Ah! So bitter! Kid, you have to study hard, or else you¡¯ll end up like jiejie.¡± Xia Mu stops the bicycle when they reach Yawang¡¯s home. ¡°You¡¯re really that tired?¡± Yawang jumps off from the bicycle and walks over to Xia Mu. ¡°Smell it.¡± He lowers his glance and leans forward to smell obediently. ¡°Can you smell it?¡± He shakes his head. Yawang hits his head slightly with her knuckles. ¡°Stupid, how can you not smell the scent of dirty sweat?¡± Xia Mu glares at her. ¡°Nonsense.¡± When they arrive to Yawang¡¯s home, no one is there, they don¡¯t know where her parents head out to. Yawang drops her bag onto the couch and looks at Xia Mu. ¡°I¡¯m going to take a shower first and then I¡¯ll cook something for you to eat.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± Xia Mu is a common guest in the Shu household, it¡¯s like as if he¡¯s returning to his own home. He takes off his shoes and gets his personal slippers to wear before sitting on the couch. Yawang is already to used to him following her home when he have nothing else to do. She goes to her bedroom to retrieve the clothes she¡¯ll change into. ¡°There are apples in the fridge, you can eat those.¡± When she reaches the door of the bathroom, she turns her head back. ¡°Help me wash one.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± He takes out two apples from the fridge and washes them, walking out to the living room with the apples. At that time, he hears water coming out from the bathroom, so he places the apples on top of the coffee table and sits down on the couch, reading a book. _______________________________________________________________ After a long, hot shower, Yawang steps out of the bathroom wearing a bathrobe. She steps out barefooted with her wet hair and walks towards to the living room. At that time, Xia Mu is studying with his head down. Yawang walks to the couch and sits down next to him, sweeping her long hair to the front, making small droplets of water splash onto Xia Mu. His eyes glance towards his hand and he brushes the water away from it. Yawang notices the two apples on top of the coffee table. ¡°Waiting for me so we can eat together? Hehe.¡± She bends her waist down to grab the apples, but her hand is still wet from sweeping her hair, causing her to drop one apple down to the floor. ¡°Ah!¡± She yelps out, causing Xia Mu to turn his head. At that time, she is reaching down to grab the apple. His eyes slant downwards for a second, and then he quickly turns his head back, his face a little flushed. She grabs the fallen apple and hands over the apple that didn¡¯t fall to Xia Mu. ¡°Hey, for you.¡± His eyes do not dare to look at her. He accepts the apple with his head down, his hands gripping onto the apple nervously. ¡°What is it?¡± Yawang asks, puzzled at Xia Mu¡¯s behavior. ¡°Nothing.¡± He shakes his head. ¡°Nothing? Then why is your face so red?¡± ¡°No¡­.it¡¯s nothing.¡± He shakes his head nervously. Yawang leans closer in curiosity. ¡°Really? Your face is turning more red.¡± She is already sitting close to him, but as she leans forward, he can smell the light, sweet fragrance from the body wash. Xia Mu bites his lips with his head still down. He suddenly grabs onto the apple and all you can hear from him is the crunching sound he makes from biting into the apple. Yawang tilts her head to the side, a bit confused. She looks at the apple in her hand and thinks to herself, does the apple taste that good? She bites into her apple and stops questioning Xia Mu. She reaches out for the remote. ¡°If you¡¯re going to study, go to my room. I¡¯m going to watch TV.¡± ¡°Oh, okay.¡± He replies with a soft voice. He fumbles while gathering his books as he stands up from the couch. He closes the door when he enters her room, leaning his back against the door with his head down. He uses the back of his hand to rub his lips, his face flushed as if he is having a fever. After awhile, he finally lifts his head up and looks at the room. He have been in the room so many times, but he don¡¯t know why, this time, this room, her scent, can make one¡¯s heart beat so fast. _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang is leaning half her body against the couch, flipping the channels with the TV remote. She stops in the entertainment channel, looking at the celebrity rumors; seeing who broke up with who and which movies are going to play soon. She starts to get sleepy as she watches the news, her eyelids slowly drooping down, slowly entering into dreamland on the couch. Today, she dreamt about Xiao Tian. In the dream, he kisses her softly. His lips are really soft, touching onto her lips lightly like a feather. It¡¯s a bit ticklish, but comforting; it feels so real that it don¡¯t seem to be a dream. By the time Yawang¡¯s parents arrive home, Yawang is still asleep on the couch, a thin blanket draped over her body, the volume of the TV turned down, and the temperature of the air conditioner adjusted so it don¡¯t feel hot or cold. Yawang¡¯s mom shakes her to wake her up. ¡°Yawang, go sleep in your bed.¡± She rubs her eyes and sits upright on the couch. ¡°You guys are back? What time is it?¡± ¡°Nine. Did you eat dinner yet?¡± ¡°Oh, no.¡± ¡°How old are you already? You don¡¯t bother to eat when Mom¡¯s not home?¡± ¡°No, I was about to, but I fell asleep.¡± She stretches her body as she stands up, then she realizes that Xia Mu didn¡¯t eat yet either. She turns her head and walk towards her room. ¡°Xia Mu?¡± She opens the door, but finds no one inside. She scratches her head in confusion. When did he leave? Without me knowing? _______________________________________________________________ In the crowded city center, a handsome teenager wearing a summer school uniform walks by himself on the streets. Maybe it¡¯s because of the humidity of the summer night, his face is flushed red. Under the lamplight, he looks out to the bustling crowd. Then, he thought of something and heads straight to the nearby shopping mall. He goes up on the escalator, the drop down glass window reflecting his skinny frame. He walks to the toiletries section and looks at the hundreds of bottles of body wash displayed in front of him, all with different colors and scents. Xia Mu walks up and grabs a bottle, lifting the cap open and sniffing at its scent. Then, he puts it back and grabs another one. He does that from one end of the row to the other end of the row. As he reaches for the last bottle, the same bottle that is being commercialized in a TV ad, the corners of his lips lift up as he smells its scent. _______________________________________________________________ In her room, Yawang casually eats her food while laying on top of her bed when she hears her phone rings. She squints her eyes and look at the phone number, it¡¯s an unknown number, but she picks it up. ¡°Hello?¡± ¡°What are you doing?¡± She flips her body over. ¡°Sleeping.¡± The person on the other line chuckles. ¡°Really, sleeping this early?¡± ¡°If there¡¯s nothing else, I¡¯m going to hang up.¡± She really don¡¯t like to talk to him. ¡°Why are you always so cold to me?¡± ¡°Do you have the prince syndrome? Why do I need to act passionate towards you?¡± ¡°Yawang-ah.¡± Qu Wei Ran¡¯s voice sounds nice, it¡¯s like a low whisper. She trembles whenever he says her name. ¡°What is it?¡± ¡°Let¡¯s have an one-night stand.¡± He speaks lightly with an alluring tone. Yawang¡¯s mind turn blank, she is unable to react. She can¡¯t believe what she had just heard! She is shaking in anger, she swears if this man had said that right in front of her face, she would have slapped him twice. Slap away his arrogant smile! ¡°You¡­you¡­..go die!¡± She yells out this curse to him, hanging up her phone and throwing it onto her bed. Fuck! So detestable! Who does he think I am? So dirty! She have never met such a dirty person before. How can Xiao Tian call him Big Brother? Complimenting him? And worshipping him?! She bites her nails in frustration. Her phone rings again and she notices that it¡¯s Qu Wei Ran. She answers the phone and starts to yell. ¡°You are sick! Are you crazy? If you¡¯re so thirsty, go to a hotel and find someone! I wish you will win the grand prize!¡± ¡°Wow. I just said one line and you¡¯re this angry. So innocent.¡± He chuckles through the receiver. ¡°Qu Wei Ran!¡± ¡°Yawang-ah, don¡¯t tell me¡­that you¡¯re still a virgin.¡± ¡°What does that have to do with you?¡± ¡°So you still are. It will be painful if you leave it for Xiao Tian.¡± Yawang inhales deeply, trying to control her shaky tone. ¡°Qu Wei Ran, don¡¯t ever call me again. Xiao Tian is still considered to be your comrade. You hitting on me, I don¡¯t know is it because you have no character or no moral. I scorn at your appearance, so don¡¯t even bother mentioning an one-night stand, I¡¯m just disgusted by looking at you. Please, stay away from me.¡± She hangs up and shuts off her phone before he gets a chance to react. I¡¯m never picking up his calls again! So despicable! _______________________________________________________________ The next day, while Yawang is taking her lunch break, Xiao Xue walks over to her side and asks if the handsome man from last night was Qu Wei Ran. When she hears his name, she loses her temper slightly. ¡°Don¡¯t mention this guy in front of me, I¡¯m annoyed of him.¡± ¡°Really? How? He is messing with you?¡± She picks the Chinese cabbage in her lunch with her chopsticks, telling everything about her and Qu Wei Ran to Xiao Xue. ¡°He really said that?¡± Xiao Xue asks, alarmed. Yawang nods her head. ¡°Cheap, right?¡± ¡°Cheap!¡± Xiao Xue agrees, nodding her head vigorously. She takes a bite of her lunch and tells Yawang, ¡°Yawang, you have to stay away from him. Let me tell you a secret, a friend of mine was his lover.¡± ¡°Lover?¡± Xiao Xue nods her head. ¡°When I saw him yesterday, I felt like I seen him before. Later when I arrived home, I remembered seeing him in my friend¡¯s home once. He would go to my friend¡¯s home two or three times a month, like an emperor visiting a concubine¡¯s chamber.¡± ¡°No way, why is your friend like that? Is there no other man in this world?¡± She asks in disbelief. ¡°What about my friend? Before she met Qu Wei Ran, she is even more cold and indifferent than the Little Dragon Girl.¡± ¡°Then how did she fall under his grasp?¡± ¡°These experienced players have their methods, it took him three months to win my friend.¡± ¡°How long have they dated?¡± She asks as she eats her lunch. ¡°Date?¡± Xiao Xue twitches her lips. ¡°They never dated, he was just playing. At the end, he don¡¯t even bother to have her as his lover anymore, but my friend still pesters him.¡± ¡°No way.¡± She is so shocked that she forgot to chew her food. A woman pestering a man just to remain as lovers? To her, it just seems ridiculous. Xiao Xue picks at the fat part of the meat and throws them onto the pit in front. ¡°That¡¯s why I say, when a bad man wins over the mind and body of a woman, her life will go down to the bottom of the pit, no one else can bring her back up.¡± She looks at Yawang afterwards. ¡°He won¡¯t drag me down, I¡¯m disgusted of him.¡± She shakes her head violently. ¡°That¡¯s what my friend said before.¡± ¡°I won¡¯t answer him.¡± ¡°That¡¯s what my friend did too.¡± ¡°I have a boyfriend.¡± Xiao Xue retrieves a napkin from her pocket and wipes her mouth with it. ¡°To him, a woman with a boyfriend is a challenge, it can stimulate his desire to conquer. Do you know why he enlists to the army? It¡¯s because there are so many male students that want to kill him in university.¡± Yawang leaves the chopsticks in her lunch box and throws the whole thing out. ¡°Hey, why do you have to make it sound so scary?¡± ¡°Just giving you a warning, I don¡¯t want you to follow my friend¡¯s footsteps.¡± ¡°Definitely will not.¡± She don¡¯t know why, but when she said that, her heart feels uneasy. She really wants to call Xiao Tian at this time, even a text message is better than nothing. Chapter 7: This man is dangerous (pt. 2) Chapter 7: This man is dangerous (pt. 2) Right when Shu Yawang is determined to cut contacts with Qu Wei Rian, her company realizes that they made a mistake on one of their orders. Since it¡¯s a really big project, the company orders hundred of thousands of seedlings. When they receive the order, they find out that the number of juniper seeds and photinia seeds are mixed up, there is a deficit of 1000 photinia seeds and an excess of 3000 juniper seeds. _______________________________________________________________ Chief Cheng is infuriated with the mistake, if it¡¯s not because the person who handled the order was hired through connections, he would have taught her a lesson. The place where they ordered the seedlings from said they can fix the order, but the company will need to pay for the shipping and handling. Manager Lin heard that the Hyde Industrial Group did not receive their shipment of seedlings yet. Under Chief Cheng¡¯s suggestion, they will exchange their surplus of 3000 junipers seeds for Hyde¡¯s 1000 photinia seeds. The two company¡¯s chiefs are old buddies, so they said they just need to talk with the person responsible for the project. Chief Cheng immediately orders Yawang to go to Hyde Industrial Group. She don¡¯t want to go, but Manager Lin do not give her time to say no when he throws the order to her and shoos her out. She wipes away her sweat when she reaches the entrance of the company. She looks up to the office on the third floor and thinks to herself, What¡¯s there to be afraid of? This guy, Qu Wei Ran, why does he have to be the person who is responsible for the project? I should have forced Xiao Xue to come with me. She bites her fingers nervously with her head down. Maybe it¡¯s because of the bright sunlight, she feels a little dizzy, but she don¡¯t want to step inside the building. At that time, her phone rings and it¡¯s an unknown number. She picks up the call in frustration. ¡°Hello?¡± ¡°How long are you going to keep standing there? You¡¯re not scared you¡¯re going to get a heat stroke?¡± He chuckles. She hangs up the call and inhales deeply before walking straight towards the building. She will not believe that he can eat her up. _______________________________________________________________ She knocks on his door before opening it, trying to conceal her nervousness. ¡°Manager Qu, I think you know the reason of me coming here, right?¡± She asks, standing by the door. He glances at her, adjusting his glasses with one hand, the glass reflecting a band of white light. He tilts his head to the side and reply, ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± She balls up her fist and looks at him, ignoring his lustful eyes, and speaks in a business tone. ¡°It¡¯s about the exchange of the juniper seeds, your chief already agreed to it. Please sign the exchange agreement form.¡± Qu Wei Ran shifts his leather chair left and right. ¡°How come I didn¡¯t know about it?¡± ¡°You can call to confirm.¡± ¡°There¡¯s no point in calling. If I don¡¯t agree to it, it¡¯s useless.¡± ¡°Qu Wei Ran!¡± She looks at him in disgust. What does he want to do?! He swirls his chair back to face her. ¡°Don¡¯t be mistaken, I¡¯m just thinking in business terms. There¡¯s no advantage for us to take your seedlings.¡± ¡°You can save on the shipping.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t need to save on that little amount of money just to get your seeds. This is too risky, who knows if the seeds you bought have problems and you¡¯re giving them to us to get rid of it?¡± ¡°If you think there are problems, you can personally go and check.¡± ¡°Are you asking me to?¡± He looks at her contemptuously. ¡°Your attitude towards other is a little, no, not a little, really bad.¡± Shu Yawang laughs at him. ¡°Me asking you? Who cares if you want to sign it or not?¡± She turns her heels and walks out the office, her high heels striking against the marble floor. Qu Wei Ran did not block her way, he smiles as he strokes his chin. _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang exits the company angrily and walk towards a shady area to call the manager. ¡°Manager Lin, Hyde¡¯s Qu Wei Ran refuses to sign. He says he don¡¯t want our seedlings.¡± ¡°What, their chief don¡¯t agree to it?¡± ¡°He said, if he don¡¯t agree, it¡¯s useless even if the chief agrees.¡± ¡°If he refuses, why won¡¯t you try convincing him?¡± ¡°I tried, I said so much I can fill up a basket, but he still said no.¡± She speaks in a hurt tone. Manager Lin replies back with a tone that carries a ¡°You¡¯re useless.¡± tone. ¡°Come back, I will personally go there.¡± She hangs up and turns her head back to look at the building.Beg you? In your dreams. She won¡¯t even bother to beg him if she was not working for this job. When she arrives back to the construction site, it¡¯s around noon, so she sits down to drink some water when Xiao Xue approaches her. ¡°What happened? He didn¡¯t take advantage of you right?¡± She asks nosily. ¡°Nope, I was at least ten steps away from him.¡± She answers, shaking her head. ¡°Who¡¯s taking advantage of you?¡± Xiao Gao, one of the rookies that got hired the same time as Yawang, asks. ¡°Nothing, she¡¯s just joking.¡± She don¡¯t want the whole world to know that she¡¯s being harassed by Qu Wei Ran. Besides, he have a cold attitude towards her today, looking and talking contemptuously at her. _______________________________________________________________ At the end of the day, Manager Lin tells everyone that Qu Wei Ran agrees to sign the exchange agreement form and they have overcome the obstacle. Everyone in the office praise the manager, saying how reliable he is to fix this mess! Evn Yawang have to admit that the manager is impressive. All of this make Manager Lin in a happy mood so he decides to have an after-work party. Everyone is paying for their own meal, but they don¡¯t mind. They choose a nearby restaurant and all seven of them exits out of the office in a cheerful mood. Yawang and Xiao Xue are the ones who are in charge of ordering the food while the men are shuffling and playing with their cards. Manager Lin looks like he forgot something, suddenly standing up and leaving the restaurant to make a phone call. Then he walks back with a cheerful smile. The dishes arrive and the men put their cards away. Manager Lin looks at his watch, then says, ¡°Let¡¯s wait for a bit, there¡¯s someone who is coming.¡± ¡°Who?¡± Xiao Xue asks. ¡°Manager Qu from the Hyde Industrial Group.¡± Yawang spits out the water from her mouth. Thankfully the table is round so everyone is pretty far away from her. However, they look at her in suspicion. She covers her mouth and coughs twice. ¡°I¡¯m going to leave now.¡± But she is stopped by her coworkers. By the time she lifts her head up, Qu Wei Ran is walking towards them. Manager Lin stands up and shakes his hand. ¡°Hello Manager Qu, it¡¯s an honor to have you here with us.¡± ¡°Thank you Manager Lin, of course I will be here when you¡¯re treating for dinner.¡± The two men laugh. Xiao Xue dips her head and whispers in Yawang¡¯s ear. ¡°He was looking at you before.¡± ¡°He just looked at you.¡± ¡°He¡¯s looking at you again!¡± ¡°Shut up!¡± Yawang hissed under her breath, pinching Xiao Xue¡¯s hand underneath the table. She yelped softly from the pain. The two men continues to discuss about the project as they¡¯re sitting down. Xiao Xue rests her head against Yawang¡¯s shoulder and whispers in her ear. ¡°Oh my god, he¡¯s sitting diagonally from you.¡± Yawang gives her an intimidating glare. She¡¯s not blind, she can see him sitting down. Even if Qu Wei Ran didn¡¯t say anything, she can feel his presence. She bites onto her lips nervously and fixes up her hair. Everyone is pretty quiet during the dinner party, Qu Wei Ran did not talk to Yawang nor did anything strange. She can finally have a moment¡¯s peace when the dinner party is over. However, Manager Lin is still in a very happy state so he suggests everyone to go karaoking. Yawang declines the invitation, saying she have something to do. Everyone objects to her declining. ¡°We only have two females, if you¡¯re leaving, what kind of fun will there be with a group of men?¡± ¡°I really have something to do.¡± She gives them a forceful smile. ¡°What do you need to do? You have to participate in group activities, let¡¯s go, don¡¯t bring the mood down.¡± Manager Lin orders her. She reluctantly agree and the whole group walks out of the restaurant in an excited mood. _______________________________________________________________ As her coworkers sing and drink in the KTV, she notices Qu Wei Ran sitting close to her. There is no space left in the couch. Whenever he moves, she can feel his shoulder brushing against hers. She stands up from the couch and pretends to choose a song, then sits somewhere that is farthest from him. After singing for awhile, Yawang¡¯s phone starts to ring. It¡¯s unknown number calling her, but the area code is from Xi¡¯an. Her eyes brighten and she excuses herself to take the phone call in an empty karaoke room. ¡°Hello?¡± ¡°Yawang, did you miss me today?¡± Tang Xiao Tian asks her with a laugh. Yawang dips her head down and smiles. ¡°How did you know?¡± ¡°Haha, I sneezed twice during class.¡± ¡°Did you catch a cold?¡± ¡°No, I¡¯m extremely healthy.¡± ¡°How are you able to call me today?¡± ¡°Hehe, I¡¯m stationed to stand guard outside, so I borrowed a cell phone to call you.¡± ¡°Again?! You better be careful to not let anyone catch you!¡± Last time Xiao Tian called her while being stationed outside, he didn¡¯t notice that someone saw him. By the time he noticed that, he quickly threw the phone out to the woods and pretend he¡¯s on his duty. When he tried to search for the phone afterwards, he found the phone in a puddle of dirty water. ¡°Don¡¯t worry, I picked a good spot today, if someone walks by, I¡¯ll be able to see them. What are you doing now?¡± ¡°I¡¯m karaoking.¡± ¡°With who?¡± ¡°What? Are you scared?¡± She asks coyly. ¡°Mmm, I am scared. You better not be singing with another man. You cannot!¡± ¡°If I want to go, I will go. I¡¯m going to sing with a group of men.¡± Tang Xiao Tian laughs from her reply. ¡°Alright, have fun. Go home early and don¡¯t drink.¡± ¡°I know, why don¡¯t you sound scared? You really don¡¯t think I¡¯ll run off with some guy?¡± She asks in disappointment. Xiao Tian is silent for awhile, then he speaks up. ¡°Yawang, I¡¯m not worried that you will go somewhere else, seeing a more beautiful scenery, or meeting a better guy,¡± She holds onto her phone as she leans her back against the wall, listening to his words. ¡°Because it¡¯s for your happiness. If I know you¡¯re happy, then I¡¯m happy.¡± She lowers her head, her hair covering her face so no one can see her expression. ¡°Come back home, you idiot.¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± The two talk for a few more minutes before hanging up. She displays a gentle, warm smile after the phone call, and opens the door to prepare to walk back to the party when suddenly her smile disappears. _______________________________________________________________ The man standing outside the door looks at her with a straight face. She wants to escape, but can¡¯t find anywhere to go, so she is forced to step back in the empty room. ¡°Excuse me, I need to go out.¡± She tells him with a glare. ¡°Your smile was beautiful, can you smile again?¡± He asks, leaning his face towards her. ¡°I can¡¯t smile when I look at you.¡± Qu Wei Ran asks: ¡°Do you really hate me?¡± Shu Yawang nods her head: ¡°Yes, I really hate you.¡± Qu Wei Ran looks at her with a seemingly distressed face: ¡°But what should I do? I¡¯m attracted to you.¡± He walks closer to her, suddenly closing the door. Yawang runs to the door and tries to open it back when he stops her with one arm. ¡°What are you doing?!¡± ¡°Making you hate me more.¡± He pulls her into him embrace and tilts his head to kiss her. Suddenly, he feels a sharp pain from below and loosen his grip on her. Before he know it, he is turned upside down and flung over the shoulder before he was thrown to the ground. Shu Yawang looks down to him with an icy glare. ¡°I¡¯m warning you, if you touch me again, I¡¯m not going to be nice about it.¡± She turns her heels and walk out of the door. She is raised in a military environment where she learnt self-defense from Uncle Tang. When they were young, there is no way Tang Xiao Tian can beat Shu Yawang in a fight. Qu Wei Ran covers the area where he got hit and chuckles. ¡°Yawang, you really anger me.¡± _______________________________________________________________ She walks back to the room and get her bag. She talk with Manager Lin briefly and leaves the room. Her coworkers notice how her expression don¡¯t look good so they don¡¯t bother to make her stay. As she walks out, Qu Wei Ran is outside walking in. She wants to push him out her way, but he tugs on to her arm and pulls her out. ¡°What are you going?¡± She shouts at him. ¡°I need to talk to you.¡± She panics and pulls his arm, dipping her head down and biting his arm. He lets go of her and she walks back to the room and sits where there are a lot of people. Qu Wei Ran smiles gently with his eyeglasses reflected from the lights. He rubs over the area where he is bitten and sits down near the exit. The corners of his lips stretch further and further, as if he is enjoying this cat-catching-mouse game. She turns her head the other way, trying to not look at him. She knows that once the party is over, he will come over and bother her. She gets her phone out and search for Xia Mu¡¯s number. Xia Mu, I¡¯m karaoking at X KTV right now. I drank a lot tonight, can you call Uncle Cheng to pick me up? Within a couple of minutes, her phone vibrates. Okay. Wow, even his text messages are short and simple, typical of Xia Mu. Uncle Cheng works for Xia Mu¡¯s grandfather, and he frequently take cares of Xia Mu. Thank you, I¡¯ll buy you candy when I come back. Even though her phone didn¡¯t vibrate afterwards, she can imagine how Xia Mu¡¯s expression will look like. She glance over to Qu Wei Ran who is sitting beside the exit. Dimwit, still guarding the door in case I run. When Uncle Cheng comes, let¡¯s see will he dare to touch even one strand of my hair! Uncle Cheng will beat the crap out of him. However, fate seems to be playing tricks on her when the staff knocks into their room saying their time is up after twenty minutes. Everyone place the microphones down and walks out, waving goodbye before departing their own ways. Yawang quickly hails a cab when she sees Qu Wei Ran talking with Manager Lin. When she sits inside, Qu Wei Ran is already entering the cab from the other side. He looks at her with a smile, his eyes seem to tell her that she can¡¯t run away from him. She grip her fists tightly and opens the car door, but got shut from Qu Wei Ran. There is very little space in the cab, she is forced to stay in her seat. She looks out the window, her back pressed against his chest. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°What do you want?¡± She asks as she turns her body to push him away from her. ¡°I need to talk to you, why do you keep on running away?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t want to talk to you, get out of the car.¡± Then she speaks to the cab driver. ¡°Mister, I was here first, tell him to get out.¡± The cab driver turns his head and looks at Qu Wei Ran. ¡°Yawang, don¡¯t be mad. I¡¯m wrong, I won¡¯t act like this again.¡± He speaks softly. ¡°You are so annoying, I¡¯m not even close with you.¡± ¡°Are you guys going or not?¡± The cab driver asks in annoyance. To him, they look like a couple who¡¯s arguing; the guy make the girl mad, the girl wants to leave, but the guy won¡¯t let her. ¡°If you have him get off, then I¡¯ll go.¡± ¡°Yawang, don¡¯t be like this.¡± ¡°Okay, both of you get off. Trying to ruin my business here.¡± He kicks both of them out. ¡°Let go of your hand, I need to get off.¡± Qu Wei Ran gladly lets go of his grasp and follows Yawang out of the cab. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Let me take you home.¡± Shu Yawang turns to him and points. ¡°Stop, stand where you are.¡± Qu Wei Ran is five steps away from her. ¡°Say whatever you need to say now, if you dare move an inch, I¡¯ll leave.¡± She tells him as she brings her hand back down. ¡°Okay.¡± He stuffs his hands into his pockets and lean against the lamp post. ¡°I know you hate me.¡± She scuffles out a laugh. Two female pedestrians are walking by, looking at them two. Qu Wei Ran flashes a warm smile at them, she admits that his smile is charming, but it don¡¯t work for her. ¡°I purposely make you hate me, so you can have a deep impression of me. Yawang-ah, I really like you.¡± He lowers his head and laugh. ¡°I haven¡¯t had this feeling for so long, that¡¯s why I hope you will be mine.¡± Then he looks at her affectionately. ¡°I know you like Xiao Tian, but he¡¯s not here with you everyday. Don¡¯t you feel lonely, feel bored? You don¡¯t yearn for a hug from a man?¡± As he talks, he steps closer to her until he can whisper in her ear. ¡°I can be your secret lover, no one else will know about our relationship except for us. When you want to stop, we¡¯ll stop. We should enjoy life when we have the time. Yawang-ah,¡± He tilts her head up with his hand wrapped under her chin. ¡°I will be the best lover, I will shower you with love and affection, teaching you a lot of joyful things.¡± She slaps his hand away from him. ¡°Are you done?¡± He wraps his arms around her. ¡°I¡¯m done talking, but it still can¡¯t satisfy me.¡± ¡°Qu Wei Ran,¡± She holds her hand up to block his face from leaning closer. ¡°Maybe to you, love is something you can play with, but for me, there¡¯s only one love that I can give to one person in my life. I love Xiao Tian, and will only love him. He¡¯s not by my side all the time, and I do get lonely. But if it¡¯s not him, I will not let another man touch me. I feel disgusted, especially if it¡¯s you.¡± She places her hand down and look at him. ¡°Please go find someone who is willing to play this game with you. I don¡¯t want to play, and can¡¯t afford to play, and I especially don¡¯t want to play this game with you. So please, let go of me.¡± Neither of them move an inch. He still have his arms around her, his lips curving into a smile. ¡°I don¡¯t want to let go, so I¡¯m not going to. The more you reject me, the more I want to control you. I feel that I¡¯m turning into a psychopath because of you.¡± ¡°You¡¯re not turning into a psychopath, you already are one.¡± She replies back, throwing a punch to his lower jaw. Qu Wei Ran escapes the blow, but Yawang raises her knee to hit his lower area. He lets go of his hold on her to shield the hit, and Yawang pushes him back before getting away from him. She walk backwards towards the street so she can keep an eye on him. Once Qu Wei Ran regains his balance, he wants to say something, but is soon forgotten when he yells at her with a horrored look. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Look out!¡± Yawang stops and turns her head. She sees a car rushing straight towards her, its light piercing straight to her eyes. She just stands there, not knowing where to go. When the car is about to hit her, a shadow rushes over and pushes her out of the way. She hears the car brakes abruptly as she falls to the ground. Underneath the white car lies a body. Yawang looks at the body who is wearing a familiar set of school uniform and a familiar body shape. She raises her hand to cover her mouth, her body trembling in fear, she don¡¯t dare speak out the person¡¯s name. Qu Wei Ran rushes towards her, stretching his hand out to touch the boy that got hit, but is slapped away by Yawang. ¡°Don¡¯t touch him.¡± Chapter 8: Xia Mu’s confession Chapter 8: Xia Mu¡¯s confession Xia Mu bites his lips and whispers in her ear, ¡°I like you.¡± _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Xia¡­.Mu¡­¡± Shu Yawang¡¯s eyes turn red as she calls out his name in a soft, shaky voice. She wants to hug him, but don¡¯t dare to touch him. She stays still, kneeling down and biting onto her fingers as she looks at him. Her heart is filled with worries and it feels heavy in her chest, so heavy that she can barely breathe. ¡°Xia Mu¡­¡± She stretches out her arm, covering Xia Mu¡¯s icy, cold hand with hers. Her voice sounds brittle, she¡¯s really scared. She¡¯s scared that he will leave her, scared that when she turns her head, she will not see him watching her from afar. She¡­she starts to cry. ¡°Xia Mu, Xia Mu.¡± Xia Mu who is on the ground, suddenly moves his hand and dips his head down, slowly standing up. Yawang helps him stand up, her eyes brimming with tears. ¡°Don¡¯t move, don¡¯t stand up. Are you hurt anywhere?¡± Xia Mu is already standing up, his tall, skinny frame bending forward slightly. He lowers his head, his fringe covering his eyes, and wipes his blurry eyes with the back of his hand. ¡°I¡¯m okay, I didn¡¯t get hit.¡± She widens her eyes, having the tears pour down her face, and covers his forehead with her hand. ¡°You idiot, you¡¯re bleeding!¡± He stands in place, trying to register what she said. He looks at the back of his hand that is covered with blood. There, he realizes that he have a concussion, and the thing that makes his vision blurry is blood from the concussion. He turns his head to the other side and cover the injury with his hand. ¡°It¡¯s okay, it doesn¡¯t hurt.¡± ¡°Are you okay?¡± Qu Wei Ran asks as he walks over to Shu Yawang. ¡°Are you hurt elsewhere? Do you want me to bring you to the hospital?¡± He asks in a caring tone. Xia Mu raises his arm and pushes Qu Wei Ran away with his hand. ¡°Go away, don¡¯t come closer to Yawang again.¡± Qu Wei Ran is taken aback from Xia Mu¡¯s words, but he regains his composure as he asks, ¡°And what if I do?¡± Xia Mu looks at him with his bloody face and dark, piercing gaze. ¡°I¡¯ll kill you.¡± When he¡¯s done, he pulls Yawang away without bothering to see Qu Wei Ran¡¯s reply. He hates this man, he extremely hates him, he nearly killed Yawang. _______________________________________________________________ Yawang lets him pull her away, her eyes constantly looking at Xia Mu¡¯s bleeding face with worry. ¡°Go to the hospital, Xia Mu. You¡¯re bleeding profusely.¡± His hand remains on the bloody region and replies back nonchalantly. ¡°I¡¯m okay.¡± He holds onto her hand tightly and walks a few more steps before they reach an Audi A8L that is parked by the road. He have Yawang go in then sits at the back seat, ordering the driver in a cold tone, ¡°Drive back home.¡± ¡°No, Uncle Cheng, take us to the hospital first.¡± She hurriedly interjects. ¡°What happened?¡± Uncle Cheng¡¯s face expression looks horrible. ¡°Nothing, don¡¯t tell Grandpa about this.¡± Uncle Cheng shifts his gaze to Yawang, whose eyes are bright red and brimming with tears. ¡°Go to the hospital, the hospital.¡± Uncle Cheng nods his head and drives to the hospital in a high speed. Xia Mu receives six switches on the top right corner of his forehead and they didn¡¯t reach back to the military compound until late night. Yawang is still worried about him, so she walks him all the way to his bedroom. She looks at his bandaged head with guilt, her eyes remaining red from tears. ¡°I¡¯m really okay.¡± He tells her as he sits on his bed, lifting his hand up to brush away the tears on her face. ¡°I was scared to death. What if something did happened, what should I do? You better not act like this next time, I rather be the one who got hit, I don¡¯t want you to get hurt.¡± Xia Mu wants to say something, but didn¡¯t, he purses his lips instead. Yawang sits next to him on his bed, their shoulders touching. She lifts her gaze and looks at the familiar room with a sigh. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°I haven¡¯t been in your home for a very long time.¡± Xia Mu lowers his head and mutters out an agreement, his eyes covered from his long eyelashes and his shadow appeared from the light, revealing a youthful aura that only teenagers have. She looks at the glass cabinet filled with toy models of military equipments. She jumps off from the bed and walks over to the models, taking a model of a fighter jet to play with. ¡°You still like playing with these huh?¡± Xia Mu twitches the corners of his lips. ¡°I haven¡¯t played with them for a long time.¡± ¡°Really? You loved to play with them when you were little. Always staring at them every day and ignoring me.¡± She tilts her head and smiles. ¡°If I didn¡¯t let you play, you will bite me.¡± She waves her right hand, pointing to a nearly invisible imprint of teeth marks. ¡°Look, this is the souvenir you left for me.¡± Xia Mu turns his head, looking like he is thinking of something when the corners of his lips lift up slightly. Yawang continues to look at the models with fascination, then a flash of silver light comes across her and catches her attention. The silver necklace that is wrapped around a military tank have two adorable fishes kissing. She picks up the necklace in curiosity. ¡°Wow, this necklace is really pretty.¡± Somehow, the necklace looks familiar to her. Xia Mu sees what she is holding and tries to grab it back, looking really nervous. Yawang hides the necklace behind her back and starts teasing him like when they were younger. ¡°Wow, why are you so agitated for? Oh I know,¡± She laughs as she escapes Xia Mu¡¯s attempts to grab the necklace. ¡°Don¡¯t tell me you have a girlfriend.¡± _______________________________________________________________ ¡°I don¡¯t.¡± He continues to reach his hand out to grab the necklace. She turns her body around and runs away, continuing to tease him. ¡°Hehe, tell jiejie about it, I¡¯m very open-minded. I wouldn¡¯t be against of you dating in an early age.¡± When he can¡¯t grab the necklace back, his tone carries a bit of frustration. ¡°That¡¯s not it, give it back to me.¡± ¡°That means you bought it for a girl who you like.¡± She stops by the end of his bed and looks at him confidently. ¡°That must be it.¡± His face blushes when he got caught with her words, so he rushes towards her to hold onto her hand. She is not standing straight and is not balanced, so she falls backwards as Xia Mu run towards her. Both of them fall onto the soft, but elastic mattress, one lying on top of the other. Shu Yawang is being pressed against onto the mattress, but she don¡¯t feel any pain. However, when she turns her head and looks at Xia Mu who is lying on top of her, her face turns red. Both of their faces are so close to each other, the tips of their noses touching, being able to feel each other¡¯s breath, all of this closeness leads to an ambiguous atmosphere. _______________________________________________________________ Xia Mu¡¯s eyes are unreadable, he continues to gaze at Yawang with his flushed face. His heart is beating extremely fast, and it looks like he is possessed as he dips his head down. Yawang looks at him in shock when she feels something touching her lips. She widens her eyes in disbelief. Xia Mu is really nervous, but he didn¡¯t stop. He places a soft kiss onto her lips again, he don¡¯t know how to kiss, it is just a light tap onto her lips. His hands grip onto hers tightly, it¡¯s not to restrict her movement, but it just comes to him automatically. His hands are filled with sweat, not knowing if it¡¯s his or hers. Yawang finally awakens from the shock and turns her head to avoid his kiss, pushing Xia Mu off with her shoulder. Xia Mu did not budge. ¡°Xia Mu!¡± She yells his name in a hushed tone. He buries his face into the crook of her neck. ¡°Will you ignore me?¡± He asks her softly in her ear. Her heart beats really fast and her face is still red. ¡°No, I won¡¯t.¡± Xia Mu bites his lips and whispers in her ear, ¡°I like you.¡± Shu Yawang didn¡¯t think he will say it so straightforwardly, it¡¯s as if he can¡¯t hide it anymore. ¡°That is because you rely on me.¡± Xia Mu turns her head to have her look at him. ¡°No, I like you.¡± He says in a stubborn tone. If she can, she will answer him back. She really wish that she can give Xia Mu happiness if she can give Xia Mu the feelings to him like he have to her. Shu Yawang likes Xia Mu, she likes the quiet Xia Mu, the cold Xia Mu, the Xia Mu who never had happiness. She wishes that he can smile for once, even a slight tug of his lips or a slight curve on the corner of his lips, she just wants to see him smile. However, there are things that can¡¯t be controlled¡­. ¡°Xia Mu, I only think of you as a younger brother.¡± She replies while lowering her gaze. Xia Mu didn¡¯t say anything, he grabs the necklace away from her and opens the clasp, helping her wear it around her neck. He touches the kissing kisses lightly. ¡°Wear it okay? Keep wearing it.¡± That was the necklace he bought for her three years ago. He was fourteen and don¡¯t know anything about love. He just knows that she likes this necklace so he bought it for her with a debit card. The debit card is what his mother left for him and he never used it before. But on that day, he used it to buy the necklace for her. He wanted to give it to her, wanted to see her smile, wanted to have her in his embrace. But, he was too scared. He never knew why he was too scared to give it to her, it¡¯s like if he gives it to her, his secret will be exposed. Today, he finally did it, he can finally tell his secret to her. Maybe from today on, she won¡¯t display her warm smile to him, but he don¡¯t regret it. He hopes that she knows that he likes her, and will continue to like her. ¡°If you want me to, I¡¯ll keep wearing it.¡± She tells him, ruffling his soft hair. Xia Mu¡¯s eyes turn dark and he turns silent. He knows he won¡¯t be able to have Yawang, he knew that from the start. But he don¡¯t want to let go, so he pulls her into his embrace, hiding his face into the crook of her neck, his eyes showing sadness, his heart feeling heavy from sadness. He don¡¯t want to let go, he don¡¯t want to¡­ _______________________________________________________________ The next morning, Shu Yawang opens her eyes in a drowsy state. She turns her head and looks at Xia Mu who is still in a deep sleep. His eyebrows narrow slightly from the uncomfortable posture he is sleeping in, and his dark circles are still as dark as before. Yawang sighs softly, he hugged her tightly to sleep the whole night like she was an abandoned child. Seeing how tightly he hugs her and how he don¡¯t want to let her go, she lets him hug her for the night. She pushes the arms around her waist lightly. Maybe because he¡¯s still in a deep sleep, he didn¡¯t move an inch. She gets off from the bed and walks to the door in light footsteps. She opens the door slowly and turns her head to look back at Xia Mu. He is still asleep in the same position. Goodbye, Xia Mu. She walks out of the door, not noticing his hands are moving. When she walks out of the villa, she lifts her head up to look at Xia Mu¡¯s room. She sees a shadow flashing by the glass window, but she pretends she didn¡¯t notice it and walks back home. When she arrive home, her mom yells at her for not coming back last night and when she explains it¡¯s because she¡¯s taking care of Xia Mu who was injured, her dad bombards her with questions. When he knows it¡¯s because of her that Xia Mu is injured, he points at her and yell, ¡°If you put Xia Mu in a dangerous situation again, I¡¯m not going to have you as my daughter, understand?¡± ¡°Yes, there won¡¯t be a next time.¡± She answers in an exhausted tone. She wonders how will her dad react when he knows that Xia Mu likes her, will he actively be against it or quickly pushes her into his embrace? She thinks it will be the latter, her dad views highly of gratitude, so whatever Xia Mu wants, he will give it to him. Yawang walks to her room and sits on her bed, reaching for the necklace around her neck. She unhooks it and looks at it in her hands, the two chubby fishes happily kissing each other. This pretty necklace matches her who is a Pisces. Ah. She finally remembers where she saw this necklace. It was when she was young, standing outside of the store inside a grand shopping mall. She really wanted to buy this necklace back then. He liked me since then? She wears the necklace back and touches the fishes, it feels cold, just like his hands. Oh no, I had Qu Wei Ran to deal with, and now Xia Mu? She rolls around her bed and buried her face into the pillow. Xiao Tian, come back. Please come back soon. _______________________________________________________________ The next few days goes on as if nothing have happened. She still wakes up and go to work and then go back home to sleep. However, the relationship between Yawang and Xia Mu change drastically; Xia Mu do not cling to Yawang as much, and Yawang don¡¯t see Xia Mu sitting in her living room studying anymore. Everytime she wants to ask a friend to go out with her, her finger will go towards Xia Mu¡¯s name on her phone, but she can¡¯t seem to press the call button. Even though they live in the same compound, it¡¯s rare to bump into each other. When that does happen, Yawang¡¯s face will automatically blush and she will dip her head down awkwardly, and before she can say anything, Xia Mu is already walking farther and farther away from her. Yawang looks at Xia Mu¡¯s back with a sigh, she have to accept the drastic change in their relationship. For some people, if they cannot be lovers, they also cannot be friends. Yawang keeps her promise and wears the necklace every day. Sometimes, when the Xia family¡¯s car drives past her, she will look at the car window. Although she can¡¯t see anything behind the black car window, she can sense the young boy looking back at her, looking at the necklace around her neck. _______________________________________________________________ The humid summer is coming to an end, and Yawang is busy avoiding Qu Wei Ran in the construction site. She is scared to bump into him again so whenever she sees a person who have a similar body shape or sounds like him, she will walk away speedily and hide. ¡°Look at you, you have the Qu Wei Ran-phobia now, is it really that scary?¡± Xiao Xue sneers. Yawang crawls out from the table she is hiding in. ¡°I¡¯m not afraid of him, I just don¡¯t want to bump into him.¡± Xiao Xue points at the window with a horrored look. ¡°Oh, Qu Wei Ran is coming!¡± Yawang quickly hides under the table again. ¡°Don¡¯t have him come in.¡± She begs nervously. Xiao Xue starts to laugh at her. ¡°And you said you¡¯re not afraid of him.¡± Once Yawang realizes she¡¯s been tricked, she rubs her nose and crawls out of the table, clearly annoyed. ¡°See how I will deal with you!¡± Xiao Xue sticks her tongue out playfully and dodges her attacks. She retrieves Yawang¡¯s bag for her to lessen her anger. ¡°Alright, let¡¯s leave now. Don¡¯t waste time trying to hit me.¡± Yawang takes her bag and looks at the time, it is indeed the time to get off from work. She decides to let this issue pass for the day, she will have her revenge tomorrow. ¡°Alright, let¡¯s go.¡± Both of them walk out of the office and strolls down the road. Suddenly, Xiao Xue shakes Yawang¡¯s arm excitedly. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Look, look, another handsome guy!¡± ¡°Huh? Where?¡± ¡°There!¡± She shifts her eye to the right, ¡°It looks like he¡¯s smiling at me! Wow, he¡¯s so handsome!¡± Yawang looks at her direction and sees a handsome man with a warm smile standing across the street from them. She widens her eyes and lets out a scream before running towards him and entering into his embrace. The man greets her back warmly, holding onto her tightly. ¡°I¡¯m back, Yawang.¡± She pushes her arms against his sturdy back to have him closer and bury her face into his chest. ¡°I miss you.¡± Tang Xiao Tian kisses the crown of her head and looks at her adoringly. ¡°I miss you too.¡± Xiao Xue slumps her shoulders and shakes her head as she walks away. So he is Yawang¡¯s boyfriend, such a lucky girl! At that time, a car drives by and stops before them. It honks a few times and the car window rolls down afterwards, revealing Qu Wei Ran¡¯s head when he sticks it out. ¡°Hey Xiao Tian, long time no see!¡± Right when she hears his voice, her body stiffens and she turns her head to give him a glare. Qu Wei Ran shrugs off her glare and even give her a wink in return. She really wants to slap him across the face. Tang Xiao Tian holds onto Yawang¡¯s hand and walks up to his car. ¡°Big Brother, long time no see.¡± The two bump their fists and smiles at each other, looking like they have a close relationship. Qu Wei Ran points to the backseat of the car. ¡°Get in, my treat for lunch.¡± Yawang tugs onto Xiao Tian¡¯s hand, giving him a look saying that she don¡¯t want to go. He squeezes her hand and leans down to whisper in her ear. ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± She lifts her gaze to look at Xiao Tian, he is definitely more mature now with his words giving her assurance. She nods her head and both of them sit in the backseat. Qu Wei Ran looks at them through the rearview mirror from time to time, their hands are never apart from each other, it¡¯s as if they don¡¯t want to separate for even a second. Shu Yawang have a feeling that Qu Wei Ran is looking at them, so she gives a glare at the rearview mirror. He chuckles and continues to drive. _______________________________________________________________ Qu Wei Ran brings them to a high-class restaurant for lunch. After they are all seated, he starts to talk. ¡°Xiao Tian likes to eat spicy food. This restaurant¡¯s spicy dishes are the best, if you try it, you¡¯ll definitely like it.¡± Xiao Tian thanks him while Yawang think otherwise, and soon the dishes arrive. The three talk while eating. ¡°How many more years until you graduate, Xiao Tian?¡± ¡°One more year.¡± He answers while picking away the carrots which Yawang hates, off from her plate and putting them onto his. ¡°That¡¯s soon.¡± Qu Wei Ran glances towards Yawang¡¯s direction, seeing how she smiles sweetly at Xiao Tian while eating. He squints his eyes and lifts up a corner of his lips to create a devilish grin, gently rubbing on Yawang¡¯s calf with his foot. Yawang¡¯s smile turns stiff and she pulls her legs away while glaring at him in anger. He looks back at her innocently then turns his head to look at Xiao Tian. ¡°How long are you going to be staying for this break?¡± ¡°Winter break is one month.¡± He turns his head and looks at Yawang who stops eating. ¡°You¡¯re full?¡¯ ¡°Uhh.¡± She nods. She¡¯s not full, she just lost her appetite because of this person! ¡°Then you go home first, I haven¡¯t seen Big Brother for a long time, we have a lot to catch up on.¡± She looks at him unhappily. ¡°Go, be good.¡± He coax her with a warm voice. She sees how persistent he is, even though she really don¡¯t want to, she nods her head. ¡°Alright then.¡± As she stands up to wear her coat, Xiao Tian suddenly pulls her and kisses her lightly on the lips, ruffling her hair with a smile. ¡°Don¡¯t be mad, I¡¯ll go look for you later, okay?¡± She blushes from the sudden act, she never would have think Xiao Tian will act like this, it was her that would display affection in the public in the past! Now, he¡¯s doing it, so annoying, so annoying, hehe! She hides her smile and pretends to give him an angry glare. ¡°Come back soon.¡± Tang Xiao Tian smiles as he watches her leave until she is away from his sight. ¡°She¡¯s pretty cute.¡± Qu Wei Ran comments as he swirls his wine glass. ¡°She is.¡± He agreed as he lowers his head and smile. After awhile, he lifts his head back up and smiles at Qu Wei Ran. ¡°Big Brother, we haven¡¯t compete in while, should we go practice?¡± Qu Wei Ran gives a meaningful smile and nods his head. ¡°Alright, let¡¯s go!¡± _______________________________________________________________ Qu Wei Ran brings Tang Xiao Tian to an abandoned basketball court. Since it¡¯s winter, there is no one else in the court. Both men remove their coats. ¡°Big Brother, should I go easy on you?¡± ¡°You brat, grown up so much to say that to me now.¡± He laughs in reply. Xiao Tian¡¯s smile disappears. ¡°Then I won¡¯t go easy.¡± He punches him immediately afterwards, Qu Wei Ran not bothering to defend himself. Xiao Tian starts to throw kicks when Qu Wei Ran is not able to regain his balance. He tries to block them with his arms , but he staggers backward at Xiao Tian¡¯s attacks. ¡°You¡¯re getting better.¡± He comments as he shakes his numb arms. ¡°You¡¯re just getting worse.¡± Xiao Tian replies while shaking his head. Qu Wei Ran smiles and throws a punch at Xiao Tian. Xiao Tian is good at fights, but Qu Wei Ran is not bad at it either, it¡¯s just that he can never beat him. Even though he always gets beaten to the ground, he likes to fight with Xiao Tian. He likes it because his whole body will be sweating and feeling numb, and he likes that feeling. Qu Wei Ran breathes heavily as he lies down onto the icy, cold ground. He looks up at the starry sky and laughs. ¡°Xiao Tian-ah, you¡¯re still the same, still not able to hide your thoughts.¡± Tang Xiao Tian walks towards him and pulls him up with one arm, giving him a serious look. ¡°Big Brother, there are a lot of women in the world, don¡¯t touch my Yawang or I won¡¯t go easy on you.¡± ¡°You aren¡¯t going easy on me this time.¡± A sharp pain stabs into his chest and he rubs the area with his hand. ¡°Four months, it¡¯s only been four months since I saw her.¡± He really wants to stand up, but the pain on his chest is preventing him to do so, so he gives up and sits up instead. ¡°If I really want to make a move on her, I would have done it a long time ago.¡± Tang Xiao Tian raises his fist, but Qu Wei Ran quickly avoids it. ¡°I¡¯m joking.¡± He lowers his fist and clenches onto the collars of his shirt instead. ¡°A joke? Do you know how much distress you have put onto Yawang?¡± Qu Wei Ran pats his hand away. ¡°You two are so serious, can¡¯t even take a joke.¡± He struggles to stand up and wears his suit jacket. ¡°Life is just a game.¡± ¡°Qu Wei Ran!¡± He slings one arm over Xiao Tian¡¯s shoulder and covers his chest with the other. ¡°Xiao Tian, you broke my rib, it really hurts.¡± Tang Xiao Tian holds onto him. ¡°It was only three this time, that¡¯s nothing.¡± ¡°Over that for a woman.¡± Xiao Tian gives him a stern look. ¡°To me, she¡¯s not just ¡®that¡¯,¡± ¡°Alright, don¡¯t get mad.¡± He tells him as he slaps Xiao Tian¡¯s shoulder. ¡°Big Brother just wants to see if she¡¯s worthy of it.¡± ¡°Worthy of what?¡± ¡°Worthy of you loving her.¡± Qu Wei Ran lowers his head and smiles. Chapter 9: The Tang Xiao Tian in Qu Wei Ran’s memory Chapter 9: The Tang Xiao Tian in Qu Wei Ran¡¯s memory The first time Qu Wei Ran met Tang Xiao Tian, his smile is very dazzling, so dazzling that it¡¯s hard for people to open their eyes. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°If she¡¯s worthy of you loving her.¡± He laughs and shakes his head on the hospital bed, he can¡¯t believe he actually said this lie. After he sits up on the bed, he struggles to grab a cigarette on the bedside drawer and bites on to it. He lights the cigarette and breathes out a smoky circle. His cold eyes wander to the window, his thoughts drifting in his mind¡­ He is an illegitimate child, and from his memories, the man that he calls his father only visits him two or three times a month. Every time he visits, his mother is very happy, always tending to him lovingly. Then she will make ways to have him get money out from his wallet and hand them over to her. After he leaves, another man will come over and cuddle with his father¡¯s lover, counting the money he left for her, and abuses his son. At first, he hated his father, then he felt fortunate afterwards. He can¡¯t help but to think how his father would react when he sees his lover cheating on him. When he found out, how will he torture them? Or maybe, he already knew about it, but brushed it off. If it was him, how would he torture the two? He smiles cruelly and inhales the nicotine from the cigarette. At the end, he was the one that tortured the two, he still remembered the thrill of revenge he felt from that day, it was really cool. It¡¯s like being able to exhale out all the silence he¡¯s been trying to suppress over the years. However, he got bored. He had a lot of women, some loved him for his looks, some loved him for the money in his wallet, and some loved him for the brand clothing he wore. He never felt that he loved any of them, he never even liked them. Whenever someone told him that they loved him, he would always feel that it¡¯s fake, that it¡¯s a joke. But whenever they asked him if he loved them, he would always answer: Yes, I love you, really love you. He love to make love with them, that¡¯s when he think there¡¯s a bit of love. What he loved about it is not their orgasms, but the ejaculation during climax. Love according to Qu Wei Ran is a joke, is there such thing as true love? In this world full of greed and lust, love is extinct. This thing only appears in the imaginations of bored young girls. That was what he thought before he enlisted to the army, then he met Tang Xiao Tian. _______________________________________________________________ When he entered his dormitory on the first day, there was only one person there. That person was hunching over the table, writing something. When he heard the door opened, he stood up and turned around. The sun shines behind him from the window and he smiled brightly at him. When he smiled, two dimples would appear, making him more handsome. He have a sunshine feel, a complete opposite of him. He sees him walking forward and extending his hand. ¡°Hello, I¡¯m Tang Xiao Tian.¡± He smiles and holds onto his hand. ¡°Hello, I¡¯m Qu Wei Ran.¡± That was the first day he met Xiao Tian. He remembered how dazzling his smile was, so dazzling that it¡¯s hard for people to open their eyes. Later, they shared bunk beds. They would go to places together and go eat together, being more close with each other. In the army, the new recruits would write letters, that¡¯s the only way they can communicate with the outside world. Every day, every night, the new recruits would be hunching over their tables writing letters to their classmates, parents, teachers, whoever they can send their letters to. A senior official said: The new recruits are like that, after three months, no one will reply back. He was right, in exception to the recruits that have girlfriends, the rest didn¡¯t receive any letters back. The senior official said: The new recruits are like that, give it six months, their girlfriends would run away or cheat on them. He was right, after half a year, there would always be recruits that didn¡¯t hear back from their girlfriends and hide under the covers to cry. However, Tang Xiao Tian still writes letters out; morning, afternoon, and night. He would write three letters a day and would sent them all out the next day. He would always tease him, ¡°How can a guy have so much to talk about? You should not be called Tang Xiao Tian, but Tang San Fung (Tang Three Letters).¡± Tang Xiao Tian will rub his nose and give a bashful smile in reply. Xiao Tian receives his letters in a steady rate, about four to five letters per week. He have a drawer where he used to put all of his baby girl¡¯s letters. He would put them in chronological order, stacked neatly inside. One time, the class president handed over a parcel to Qu Wei Ran to give to Tang Xiao Tian. He took the parcel and weighed in with his hand, guessing that it¡¯s some sort of large book inside. He looked at the address written on the parcel with a black pen, the handwriting is so pretty. At the bottom of the parcel, she wrote her name: Shu Yawang. Yawang? Like a beautiful wish? That¡¯s a really pretty name. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Xiao Tian, your mail.¡± He throws the parcel over to Xiao Tian who is sitting by the windows. He takes the mail and runs his finger to the corner to open it. Qu Wei Ran walks back to his seat and looks at Tang Xiao Tian. He sees him retrieve a sketchbook, and when he flips to the first page, his face displays a shocked expression, followed by a radiant smile. From then, he feels a little envious towards Xiao Tian. He¡¯s envious that Xiao Tian have someone who he can share his time with, someone who makes him miss her every day, he¡¯s envious that he have someone who will wait for him, he¡¯s envious of his radiant smile. Why had he not encountered anyone like that in his life? Why is it that even though he have a lot of girlfriends, not one of them motivate him to write a letter for? From that moment, he thought that Xiao Tian¡¯s smile is glowering, so glowering that he felt uncomfortable. There is such thing as true love in this world, it¡¯s just that, that kind of love have nothing to do with him. _______________________________________________________________ Three years later, once he saw the familiar words on a paper, his head lifts up to see the woman before him. She is not as beautiful as a goddess, but she looks pure. ¡°Yawang-ah, nice to meet you.¡± He don¡¯t know why he is so agitated. The moment he saw her, he wants her, he don¡¯t know why, he just wants her. He told Xiao Tian that he¡¯s testing to see whether she¡¯s worthy for him to love her so. He told him that it was a joke, he lied. He want her, he wants Shu Yawang, Tang Xiao Tian¡¯s Shu Yawang. He don¡¯t hate Xiao Tian, he really don¡¯t, he really likes him. He likes his bright personality and his smile. But he hates love, he hates seeing people who are deeply in love before him. The love is so aggravating to him that he just wants to destroy it. He dumps the cigarette into the tray after he¡¯s done, revealing a cold smile from the corners of his lips. Chapter 10: Sweet love (pt. 1) Chapter 10: Sweet love (pt. 1) When we were little, I really admired you. It¡¯s because you have a set goal, you know what you like, what you want to do, how your future is going to be like. I like this type of you, I also wish to become like you. _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang singing to ¡°Honey Honey¡± by Stefanie Sun. ¡°You¡¯re going to fly if you keep on spinning.¡± Her mother laughs as she looks at her daughter who is singing in her room as she chooses what clothes to wear. She picks a Korean-style white coat and spins twice to reach to her mother, singing the next few lines of this sweet, love song. ¡°Crazy, this girl is turning crazy. Your honey is waiting for you downstairs, go already.¡± Her mother shakes her head at her. Yawang wears her coat and continues to sing as she strolls down the hallway, clutching onto her purse as she skips downstairs. Her mother keeps on shaking her head as she follows her. ¡°She will not live here within the next two years, need to start preparing for the wedding already.¡± Her father is smoking on the couch. ¡°It¡¯s not like she¡¯s going to be far away, it¡¯s only in the neighboring building.¡± Her mother looks down from the staircase where Yawang jumps into Xiao Tian¡¯s embrace, her face full of happiness. Her mother smiles and nods her head at Tang Xiao Tian approvingly. ¡°Xiao Tian is turning more handsome as he turns older, I don¡¯t think there are any other guys in the compound that is as handsome as him.¡± Her father exhales a string of smoke. ¡°What are you talking about? Xia Mu is as handsome as him.¡± ¡°All you talk about is Xia Mu, is he your son?¡± She asks in disappointment. Her father laughs in reply. ¡°Fine, fine, fine. Handsome, handsome, Xiao Tian is handsome! Look at you, a mother-in-law looking at her son-in-law like that.¡± ¡°I can look at him however I want to, are you forbidding me not to?¡± She glares at him. Her father stands up from the couch and puts on his military hat. He looks back at her when he opens the door. ¡°Keep looking then, I¡¯m going to work.¡± ¡°Go, go.¡± Her mother waves her hands away to shoo her husband to work. She turns her body and walks towards the kitchen as she talks to herself. ¡°I need to go buy some food later and cook a nice meal for Xiao Tian for dinner.¡± Her father shakes his head as he walks out. ¡°Both women are crazy of him. Is he more handsome than I was when I was young?¡± He thinks about the question for the moment, then decides not to answer it and leaves for work. _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang and Tang Xiao Tian are walking across the courtyard of the military compound with their hands interlaced. The winter wind is still a bit chilly, but since Yawang wants to dress pretty, she wears a miniskirt with a pair of brown boots and covers herself with an oversized white coat. She is also wearing a set of red gloves and a red scarf, making her look young and beautiful. Xiao Tian is wearing his green army jacket with a pair of old jeans. He is holding onto Yawang¡¯s hand with his right hand and her purse with his left. ¡°Are you going to take me to work?¡± She asks as she rocks their hands back and forth. ¡°Yeah, I¡¯m taking you to work.¡± He answers with a loving smile. ¡°Give me a piggyback ride.¡± She lets go of his hand and tries to jump on his back. She wraps her arms around his neck and sticks onto his back. ¡°You haven¡¯t given me a piggyback ride in ages.¡± He rubs his nose and lowers his head as he blushes. ¡°There¡¯s a lot of people in the morning.¡± ¡°So what if there¡¯s a lot of people? You can¡¯t give me a piggyback ride if there¡¯s a lot of people?¡± He leans forward and she happily jumps onto his back. He carries her with no difficulty and she asks as they start walking. ¡°Did I got heavier?¡± ¡°No, you¡¯re as light as a feather.¡± He laughs. She shakes her body a few times in excitement. He laughs and shakes his head as they stroll along the streets. When a car is driving by them, they will slow down and watches them. Then they will see their faces full of happiness and drive off in a happy state. _______________________________________________________________ A bicycle drives past them; the young boy is wearing a white coat and he looks back at them briefly, locking eyes with Xiao Tian. The boy¡¯s eyes are cold and emotionless, as they wander to look at Yawang, they are also cold and expressionless. He turns his head back and quickly drives away. ¡°Was that Xia Mu that just passed by?¡± ¡°Mhm.¡± She looks at Xia Mu¡¯s back with worry. It¡¯s winter and he¡¯s still riding his bike? ¡°He don¡¯t even answer to you now.¡± She didn¡¯t answer right away, instead, she reaches to the necklace and touches it. It¡¯s cold against her skin, just like how his eyes are when he looks at her. Xiao Tian looks at Yawang¡¯s face that is full of disappointment. ¡°He¡¯s probably in the puberty stage, being a rebel and all.¡± She laughs at his comforting words. ¡°Probably.¡± He drops her down gently to the ground. ¡°Wait here, I¡¯ll go get the car.¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± She nods her head and watches him as he walks to the garage. A familiar looking jeep appears and stops in front of her. Xiao Tian opens the shotgun seat door for her. She climbs in the jeep and touches the interior in surprise. ¡°Xiao Tian, I can¡¯t believe your dad actually lets you drive this.¡± He laughs as he steers the wheel. ¡°My dad bought a new one, so he threw this one out for me.¡± ¡°That has nothing to do with you getting a second-hand car. Your dad don¡¯t even let you ride a bicycle to school, always making you go by foot. Now he lets you drive,¡± She pause to look at Xiao Tian. ¡°That proves something.¡± ¡°Prove what?¡± She stretches out her arm and reaches for his short, stiff hair. She looks at him with a serious expression as she touches his hair. ¡°You¡¯re grown up.¡± ¡°Quit playing.¡± He shakes his head, wanting Yawang to let go of her grasp. She likes playing with his hair, she likes how it pricks against her hand. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Yawang, a man¡¯s head cannot be touched.¡± She leans forward and argue back, ¡°A woman¡¯s waist cannot be touched either, can you guarantee that you won¡¯t touch my waist then?¡± He licks his lips and smile, revealing his pair of sweet dimples. ¡°How is that the same?¡± ¡°How is it not the same? From now on, only you can touch my waist and only I can touch your hair. Then, it will be the same.¡± He rubs his nose and chuckles as he lowers his head. Then he looks at Yawang and take her hand away from his head and holds onto it. ¡°Okay, you can touch it. Only you can touch it.¡± Yawang covers her mouth with one hand as she laughs at him. He thought about Yawang¡¯s words earlier and laugh as well, revealing his sweet dimples once again. Yawang leans forward in her seat. ¡°Xiao Tian, Xiao Tian, your smile is beautiful.¡± He turns his head to look at her. ¡°If you¡¯re going to be like this, I¡¯m not going to drive you to work.¡± He replies as he arches his eyebrows. ¡°What are you going to do then?¡± ¡°Bring you back home.¡± He glance at her briefly. ¡°And then¡­¡± Yawang¡¯s heart starts to beat fast as she feel herself blushing. ¡°And then what?¡± ¡°Not let you leave.¡± She covers her mouth with her hand. ¡°I can¡¯t believe you have such perverted thoughts!¡± His face starts to turn red and gives an awkward expression. ¡°Uh¡­.¡± Yawang place her head down onto the dash cover, hiding her face with her arm. ¡°And I like that.¡± She takes a peek to see his reaction after she finishes her sentence. Both of their faces are red and it feels like the temperature is rising inside the car. Tang Xiao Tian suddenly hits the steering wheel and brakes the car, parking the car on the side of the street. ¡°Yawang, don¡¯t go to work today.¡± He tells her, licking his lips nervously. ¡°I can¡¯t.¡± She answers back, rubbing her nose awkwardly. Xiao Tian¡¯s face is still red, but you can see the disappointed look on his face. ¡°I have a lot of work to do.¡± She continues. ¡°Oh.¡± He purse his lips and continue driving. Yawang turns on the radio and sings along to the song that is currently playing. Xiao Tian smiles from her rendition, his foot tapping with the beat and occasionally humming a few lines. His mood turns brighter from the song and he looks out of the window and thinks to himself, The sky is so blue, the air is so fresh, Yawang is so adorable. The upbeat melody continues on until they reach the building where Yawang works. She rolls down the window and looks at the building in front. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°I really don¡¯t want to go to work.¡± ¡°Then don¡¯t go.¡± She laughs and answer him back as she continues to look out the window. ¡°Work is tiring and even irritating sometimes, but as I work longer, I discover that this job is very meaningful. Xiao Tian, do you know what is the name of that tree?¡± She points to a tree down the road and he shakes his head in reply. ¡°That¡®s called a dragon juniper.¡± She continues to name the different trees down the road. ¡°Holly, crape myrtle, painted maple, over there are Chinese juniper and photinia.¡± She lowers her head and chuckles to herself. ¡°I didn¡¯t know any of these before, now ever I started working here, I learn how to place them around the cities and use them to protect our environment. Isn¡¯t that pretty neat?¡± She takes his hand and place it onto her palm. ¡°When we were little, I really admired you. It¡¯s because you have a set goal, you know what you like, what you want to do, how your future is going to be like. I like this type of you, I also wish to become like you.¡± He looks back at her and interlaces their hands together. ¡°I really like this job. I hope one day, I can use my own design and create a place as beautiful as heaven.¡± She lowers her head in embarrassment. ¡°Does it sound like an unrealistic dream?¡± ¡°No.¡± Xiao Tian pulls her towards him, resting his chin on top of her head and running his fingers through her hair. ¡°It¡¯s a very great dream, work hard, it will come true.¡± ¡°Mmm, we have to see it together when that happens.¡± She lowers her head again and smiles shyly. ¡°Because if you¡¯re there, it¡¯s heaven.¡± _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Because if you¡¯re there, it¡¯s heaven.¡± He repeats her words, smiling as he drives off. He keeps on thinking what she said and can¡¯t help, but to smile from it. The happy melody continues to play in the car when he suddenly feels hot inside. He rolls down the window and a cool breeze enters immediately. He didn¡¯t feel the slightest cold as the wind blows the collar of his shirt. He curves of the corner of his lips and makes an U-turn to drive back to Yawang¡¯s workplace. He looks at the building through the car window, he knows she won¡¯t be able to see him, but he don¡¯t want to leave, he wants to stay close to her. He can imagine her focusing on her drawings, imagine her walking across the office with her arms fulled of folders, imagine her holding a mug as she sits on her office chair, imagine her chatting with her coworkers. He didn¡¯t think that it¡¯s silly and time consuming. Being able to sit here quietly and waiting for her to get off from work is also a blissful thing to him. At that time, he sees Yawang rushing out the door and trying to catch a taxi cab. ¡°Yawang!¡± He shouts, sticking his head out from the car. Yawang looks surprised to see him, but rushes towards him. ¡°Why are you still here?¡± ¡°I¡­.I think I dropped something, so I come back to look for it.¡± ¡°What can you drop when you¡¯re driving the car?¡± He nods in embarrassment. ¡°What happened?¡± ¡°Oh, right!¡± She opens the car door and sits on the seat. ¡°Drive me to our high school.¡± ¡°What¡¯s wrong?¡± He asks as he starts the car. She looks angry as she answers back. ¡°Xia Mu¡¯s teacher called, he got into a fight in school.¡± _______________________________________________________________ Xiao Tian looks at her angry face and tries to comfort her. ¡°Not a lot of people find his personality likable, it¡¯s possible for him to be excluded.¡± ¡°Not likable? How can he be not likable?¡± She raises her fists at him. ¡°No, I think it¡¯s cute.¡± They quickly drive to the school and Yawang immediately gets out of the car. She sees the familiar buildings and gardens, which did not seem to have changed for the past years. She sighs out loud as she looks towards the pathway to the main entrance. ¡°It seemed like we were biking to school yesterday.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± He nods his head in agreement, standing beside Yawang and looking at the same direction as she is. He remembers the grey skies as they biked to school, the chilly wind greeting them as he protects his warm soy milk in his backpack. ¡°I wonder if Teacher Gao is still here.¡± ¡°He still is, Zhang Jing Yu just saw him last time.¡± ¡°I see.¡± Yawang sees Xiao Tian¡¯s face full of anticipation when he hears that his homeroom teacher is still in school. ¡°Go visit him, I¡¯ll go see Xia Mu first, then I¡¯ll look for you.¡± He ponders for awhile, then nods his head. ¡°Okay.¡± They both wave their hands to each other and goes to their separate ways. _______________________________________________________________ Yawang sprints to the high school building and finds the teachers¡¯ office. She opens the door shortly after knocking. She sees three women who she assumed are the parents at the right, a young woman who is the teacher in the middle, and Xia Mu with three other male students at the left. Her eyes stop as they land onto Xia Mu, she sees a cut on his lips, a purplish bruise on the corner of his eye, and his white coat is stained with dirt. She turns more angry as she looks at him, it¡¯s unacceptable! Xia Mu is the baby in her family¡¯s household, if she even dare to raise her voice at him, her dad will threaten her. But in school, someone dare to hit his handsome face and creates bruises all over? ¡°You are Xia Mu¡¯s¡­¡± The young woman asks as she walks over to her. She takes a napkin out from her coat pocket and wipes off the dirt on his face as she answers back. ¡°I¡¯m his older sister.¡± After she said that, Xia Mu turns his head to the other side, not letting her wipe his face. She forcefully turns his head back in frustration. ¡°Don¡¯t move!¡± As she looks at the bruise on his lips, her anger boils. She glares at the three male students and the young teacher waves her hands frantically. ¡°Um¡­Miss Xia¡­¡± ¡°My surname is Shu.¡± She whips her head back and glare at her. ¡°Umm¡­Miss Shu, I think you¡¯re mistaken. The reason I call you to come here is not because the three students hit Xia Mu, it¡¯s Xia Mu who hit them.¡± The three mothers immediately stands up and unzips their child¡¯s coat. ¡°Look at how your younger brother beat my child up!¡± ¡°Look at how he made my child¡¯s head have a bruise!¡± ¡°He made a fool out of my child!¡± She pulls Xia Mu towards them and fights back. ¡°Look at how your children hit my younger brother back.¡± The four young men look back at her in guilt, one of them actually speaks up. ¡°It¡¯s him that hit us. Look at our injuries, it¡¯s far more worse than his.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry, I mistaken you guys.¡± The young teacher apologize with a light laugh. ¡°You guys are injured?¡± Yawang asks, looking at the three students up and down. They seem fine to her. ¡°See it for yourself!¡± The male student said, taking off his coat. The other two students strip off their shirt, one of them even takes off his pants. The young teacher¡¯s face flushes and stammers out, ¡°They do have worser injuries.¡± ¡°Really?¡± Yawang crosses her arms across her chest and looks at the stripping male students. Suddenly, her view turns black as a hand covers her eyes. ¡°I hit them.¡± Xia Mu murmurs out from the back. ¡°See, he admitted it. Teacher, you are biased to Xia Mu! When he see him injured, you said it¡¯s us who hit him.¡± ¡°It¡¯s because it¡¯s on his face.¡± She replies with an apologetic face. ¡°He¡¯s so cunning, hitting in the places where you can¡¯t see!¡± She looks at Xia Mu¡¯s arms and laughs in her mind. She don¡¯t know if it¡¯s the male students that are stupid or Xia Mu that is smart, how can you not understand the logic of not hitting one¡¯s face in a fight? _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Um, Miss Xia¡­¡± ¡°It¡¯s Shu.¡± Jeez, this teacher is stupid too. ¡°Oh, I¡¯m sorry. Miss Shu,¡± The teacher chuckles softly. ¡°Since it¡¯s Xia Mu who hits them, based on the school policy¡­¡± Yawang raises her arm in protest. ¡°They are three people whereas Xia Mu is alone, if you look at it, it¡¯s Xia Mu who¡¯s in a disadvantage. I can forgive them for ganging up on him, but you still want to punish Xia Mu? If there¡¯s punishment, then everyone should be punished.¡± ¡°Right, um, they should all be punished.¡± ¡°Teacher!¡± All of the three students cry out, ¡°Why are you punishing us?¡± ¡°Because you guys are fighting.¡± The young teacher murmurs. ¡°Teacher, are you a recent graduate?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± Yawang sighs and pulls the teacher to side to talk to her privately. The teacher¡¯s face changes from being surprised to touched, the corners of her eyes turning red like she¡¯s about to cry. ¡°I hope you can understand.¡± The teacher nods her head and gives Xia Mu an emphatic look. ¡°You may leave Xia Mu, listen to your sister well.¡± Xia Mu looks at Yawang with a raised eyebrow, she gives him a wink in return. ¡°Teacher!¡± The male students yell out. ¡°Alright, I¡¯ll treat you all to lunch okay?¡± ¡°No!¡± She pulls Xia Mu out of the office as the male students continue to voice out their discontent. _______________________________________________________________ Yawang turns her head back and laughs as she looks at his teacher. ¡°Your teacher is pretty cute.¡± ¡°So naive.¡± Yawang laughs and nods her head in agreement. ¡°She is.¡± Xia Mu stuffs his hands in his pockets and follows her with his head down. After they reached the ground floor, he suddenly stops in place. ¡°What did you tell her?¡± Yawang stops walking and turns her head back. ¡°I just made up a story of a child that¡¯s been living a tragic life, always getting bullied, but will never be intimidated by them. I didn¡¯t think that she will believe in it!¡± ¡°You always bully honest people.¡± She looks at him without saying a word. ¡°What are you looking at?¡± ¡°You¡¯re finally talking to me.¡± Xia Mu snorts out a sound and lowers his head. ¡°You¡¯re the one that has been ignoring me.¡± ¡°When had I ever ignored you?¡± She asks, feeling wronged. ¡°You don¡¯t have time to talk to me.¡± ¡°Ha, so you¡¯re jealous.¡± She laughs. He gives her a glare and quickly walks out of the school building. Yawang chases after him to catch up with him. ¡°Sorry, I¡¯m already taken, I can¡¯t promise you anything. If you like the older sister type, I think your teacher is alright, she¡¯s cute and naive, and she¡¯s pretty too¡­¡± Xia Mu stops walking and looks at Yawang with a cold stare. She sees his cold expression and licks her lips to stop talking. He closes his fists and shoots her a glare. ¡°Shu Yawang, you¡¯re a bigger idiot than my teacher.¡± It¡¯s as if Yawang is a ball that got poked by a needle, her self-esteem deflating like a punctured ball. Xia Mu is about to say something else, but he sees a familiar shadow walking towards them, so he turns his head back. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Are you alright Xia Mu?¡± Xiao Tian asks with a warm smile. ¡°I¡¯m alright.¡± He reply back coldly, shaking his head. Xiao Tian notices the bruises on his face. ¡°I¡¯m good at fights, let me teach you a few moves.¡± ¡°Do you think I need to be taught?¡± He asks as he looks at Xiao Tian. ¡°Um¡­¡± Xiao Tian don¡¯t know how to answer him back. Xia Mu don¡¯t need to be taught, his grandfather¡¯s bodyguards themselves are considered to be the best fighters. ¡°Xia Mu.¡± Yawang scolds him with her narrowed eyebrows. He didn¡¯t bother to look back at her when he turns his heels and walk away. Yawang looks at his back with a sigh and Xiao Tian gives a helpless smile. ¡°He still hates me.¡± ¡°He really don¡¯t like you.¡± She helplessly nod her head. ¡°But your dad really likes him.¡± He laughs. ¡°He really likes him, he likes him more than he likes me.¡± He stuffs his hands in his pockets and look at her with a teasing smile. ¡°You like him too.¡± Yawang is dumbfounded from his words. He lowers his head and smiles shyly. ¡°So I like him as well.¡± She is frozen for awhile, then reaches her arm out to hold onto Xiao Tian¡¯s hand, leaning close to him. ¡°Ah, what a nice brother-in-law.¡± Both of them exchange glances and smile. Chapter 10: Sweet love (pt. 2) Chapter 10: Sweet love (pt. 2) Warning: This part contains rape. I will put some asterisk before the part so you can stop reading if you feel uncomfortable. The days with Tang Xiao Tian are filled with music notes that jump up and down, full of happiness in life. Whether it¡¯s going to work, getting off from work, or hanging out with friends, they will always show up together, making everyone jealous. The people who are the most jealous are Xiao Xue and Zhang Jing Yu. Xiao Xue will glare at Yawang whenever Xiao Tian drops her off to work or picks her up from work. Yawang decides to introduce the two to each other so she can get rid of these third-wheelers. She will never think they will end up together. ¡°When I lay my eyes on him, I know it¡¯s love at first sight.¡± Xiao Xue tells her. ¡°Finally!¡± Zhang Jing Yu tells her. These two are as cheesy as the couples in the movies. Zhang Jing Yu will wait for Xiao Xue outside of the company building while holding a stalk of rose in his hand. Whenever he sees Tang Xiao Tian waiting for Yawang, he will flash a cheeky smile to him. ¡°Hey bro, you¡¯re early today.¡± ¡°You¡¯re pretty early yourself.¡± Xiao Tian replies, trying to hold back his laughter. The two men lean against Xiao Tian¡¯s car and chat for awhile while waiting for their girlfriends. Whenever Yawang sees this scenario, she will burst out laughing. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°What¡¯s so funny?¡± Jing Yu asks, tapping his fist onto her head. ¡°How you look with the rose in your hand is funny.¡± She answers back, continuing to laugh at him. He ignores her and stride towards Xiao Xue, handing the rose to her. She will twist her body from side to side and accepts the rose unwillingly. ¡°Don¡¯t bring roses next time, it¡¯s embarrassing.¡± She murmurs softly. ¡°No!¡± He rejects. ¡°I will bring them, bring a stalk each day so it will accumulate to 99999 roses!¡± ¡°Jing Yu.¡± She looks at him. ¡°Xiao Xue.¡± They give each other a tight hug, shaking their bodies violently from side to side. Yawang rubs the goosebumps off from her arm and tugs onto Xiao Tian¡¯s arm while shaking her head. ¡°Let¡¯s go, leave them here to act in their own movie.¡± ¡°Not bad, not bad.¡± He comments, looking at them. Yawang turns her head back when she sees Xiao Tian laugh, Zhang Jing Yu looks back at them and holds out a V sign, flashing his cheeky smile at them. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Look at him being so cheeky, I should ask him for my matchmaker money next time.¡± She grumbles. Xiao Tian smiles and nods his head, holding onto Yawang¡¯s hand as they climb into the car. He didn¡¯t start the car right away, instead, he stuffs his right hand in his right pocket and bites his lips nervously. ¡°For this Chinese New Year, I want both of our families to meet for Chinese New Year¡¯s Eve dinner. I want them to see each other.¡± ¡°But don¡¯t they see each other often?¡± She asks with a confused look. Their families live close to each other; both of their mothers will go grocery shopping together and both of their fathers see each other at work. ¡°Yes they do, but I want them to see the main point, do you understand?¡± Her eyes flash suddenly and she displays a sneaky grin. ¡°No, I don¡¯t.¡± ¡°Then pretend you do.¡± ¡°I really don¡¯t understand.¡± She throws a strong glare to him, proving that she don¡¯t know what he¡¯s talking about. He glares back, pulling onto Yawang¡¯s left hand and taking his right hand out from his pocket, thrusting a ring onto her ring finger. The platinum ring touches her skin, the cool touch quickening her heartbeat. Xiao Tian leans over and kisses her softly. She closes her eyes and kisses him back, holding onto their hands tightly. She can feel his breath, can feel how his lips move subtly onto hers. It¡¯s a beautiful kiss that acts as a promise; it¡¯s warm and intimate, imprinted onto them. Shu Yawang leans her arm against the car window, looking at her ring as the sunlight beams on it. She sees the small stones reflecting the light. The corners of her lips slowly curves up, and when her smile reaches the maximum length, she forcefully hides her smile. Then the corners of her lips will curve up again¡­ On Chinese New Year¡¯s Eve, the two families book a private room to eat dinner in a well-known restaurant in S City. Their families approve of their marriage and goes quickly to the planning. They will marry when Tang Xiao Tian turns twenty-five years old. His mother already chosen their wedding date which happens to be on the day Yawang turns twenty-five. She tells them it¡¯s an auspicious date, it¡¯s ideal to get married that day. Shu Yawang secretly holds onto Xiao Tian¡¯s hand below the table. He grips onto her hand and she lowers her head, her face filled with shyness and warmth. _______________________________________________________________ Not long after, Tang Xiao Tian returns to school before Valentine¡¯s Day. He asks Zhang Jing Yu to give Yawang a large bouquet of roses and a box of chocolate. He speaks to Xiao Tian afterwards that day on the phone. ¡°You should have seen me, I have a beautiful lady holding a bouquet of roses on my left and another beautiful lady holding a bouquet of roses on my right. People who walked past were looking at me with envy.¡± Xiao Tian¡¯s chuckle at Jing Yu¡¯s bragging. ¡°Thank you.¡± ¡°There¡¯s no need to thank me.¡± Jing Yu answers back in a serious tone. After awhile, Jing Yu speaks up. ¡°Xiao Tian, I really like seeing you with Yawang together. Just looking at you two makes me feel happy.¡± ¡°Aren¡¯t you happy now?¡± ¡°I am, my Xiao Xue is much cuter and gentler than Yawang.¡± Xiao Tian lifts his head and looks out at the night sky, continuing to listen to Jing Yu¡¯s rambling. The days pass by smoothly like running water, Xiao Tian will receive one letter a day from Yawang. She will write letters to him during her office breaks, and sometimes she will give him a call. They are waiting for that day to arrive, the day to seal their promise to each other. _______________________________________________________________ A year later, the company¡¯s go-green project is finally completed. Chief Cheng and the other chiefs that participated in the project book a room in a grand restaurant in S City for a congratulatory work dinner. ¡°Everyone can bring a date along, you all have worked hard.¡± Chief Cheng proudly announce to the workers in the office. Xiao Xue calls Jing Yu to come and he immediately agrees. ¡°Yawang, you should go ask a friend to come along. We all had worked hard, and it¡¯s a rare opportunity for the bosses to treat dinner, so we should eat our work¡¯s worth.¡± ¡°Right, I shouldn¡¯t go there alone, it wouldn¡¯t be worth it.¡± Yawang agrees as she nods her head and twirls the pen in her hand. But who should I call? Yawang scrolls through her contacts list and realizes that she don¡¯t have many friends. She scrolls through them, not being able to find who she wants to invite. She places her phone on her desk and grumbles as she lies her head on the desk. After a short while, she lifts her head up and opens her phone again. She scrolls to Xia Mu¡¯s number and sighs unconsciously, her right hand touching onto the necklace around her neck. She bites her lips and press the call button. The phone rings, but no one is picking up. Did he not bring his phone with him? Or he don¡¯t want to answer it? She waits for a few more rings, then shuts the cover of her phone. Fine, I¡¯ll go myself. I can eat enough for two people, and I¡¯ll choose the most expensive dishes to eat too! _______________________________________________________________ The dinner doesn¡¯t start until 7pm so Yawang and Xiao Xue stay in the office until 6pm to wait for Zhang Jing Yu to pick them up. He shows up wearing a white suit, appropriate for this occasion. A man wearing a suit is the same as a woman wearing a mini skirt, they attract attention from the opposite sex. Zhang Jing Yu looks alright and with a height of 180cm, he emits a mature and stable aura. ¡°Why are you dressed like a groom today?¡± Yawang teases him. ¡°Handsome right?¡± He replies back, running his finger through his hair. ¡°Handsome!¡± Xiao Xue yells out, nodding her head. ¡°Sure.¡± Yawang laughs. Jing Yu reaches his arm out to hit her, but she is able to escape from him. Those three play around as they enter the restaurant. The room is at the second floor and the food is displayed in buffet style. On one side, there lies a variety of gourmet to choose from and the other side lies the dining area where they set up some long tables. They¡¯re playing the most recent songs in the background while the three rushes to get plates to put their food in. ¡°Hurry up, or everyone else will get all the good stuff.¡± Xiao Xue rushes them, dumping her bag onto an empty seat as she pulls Jing Yu with her. She turns her head around and looks at Yawang. ¡°Stay here and watch our stuff. We¡¯ll bring back good food for you.¡± Yawang nods and sits down on a nearby chair. The two return quickly to her side with two large dishes of food. Xiao Xue sits down and orders Jing Yu to grab some drinks for them. He listens to her obediently and goes to retrieve their drinks. Around that time, tens of people stand up from the neighboring table and they all turn their head around to look. They see the Hyde Industrial Group¡¯s CEO walking with Qu Wei Ran by his side. As the CEO approaches them, he will chat among his employees. ¡°Sit, sit, continue eating.¡± Xiao Xue picks up some chilled jellyfish from her plate as she gossips with Yawang. ¡°Wow, this illegitimate child, Qu Wei Ran, is going to be legitimate now.¡± ¡°Illegitimate child?¡± Yawang asks. Xiao Xue leans over to whisper. ¡°I heard from the workers in Hyde Industrial that the CEO¡¯s first wife has a son, but he ran away two years ago to go to a mountain expedition. At the end, he died in the mountains, and Qu Wei Ran came along, so the CEO promotes him to be the project manager.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± Yawang nods her head in understanding. No wonder he got promoted so fast after graduating.¡°He¡¯s pretty lucky.¡± ¡°Mhm,¡± Xiao Xue nods. ¡°Hyde Industrial Group is worth several billions dollars, so, good for him.¡± Yawang lifts her head to look at Qu Wei Ran. He is wearing a black suit with a golden tie, his rimless glasses resting on the bridge of his nose. His playful gaze and warm smile makes people have a good impression of him, if the women didn¡¯t know of his personality, they will definitely be head over heels for him. _______________________________________________________________ Qu Wei Ran is able to find Yawang out of all the people in restaurant. He looks at her and smiles, like how a graceful aristocrat does. ¡°Scumbag.¡± She blurts out, turning her head away. Jing Yu walks back to the table with the three drinks and looks at Yawang innocently. ¡°What did I do?¡± ¡°I¡¯m condemning you.¡± Yawang replies back indifferently. Xiao Xue bites her lips to hold her laughter. ¡°He is a scumbag. I don¡¯t know who he offended, but he got beaten to the point where he needed to stay in the hospital. I heard he broke several ribs.¡± ¡°Whoa, really?¡± Yawang asks excitedly. ¡°Really.¡± ¡°Who are you guys talking about?¡± Jing Yu interrupts, trying to be part of the conversation. ¡°Him.¡± Xiao Xue points to Qu Wei Ran. He turns his head to take a look. ¡°Oh, him!¡± ¡°You know him?¡± Yawang asks. Jing Yu gives them a mysterious smile. ¡°I saw him once.¡± ¡°When?¡± ¡°It¡¯s a secret.¡± He answers, shaking his finger left and right at them. ¡°Say it.¡± Xiao Xue orders, hitting her fist on the table. ¡°Okay, it¡¯s like this,¡± Jing Yu removes his suit jacket and rolls up the sleeves of his shirt. ¡°One night a long time ago, my friends and I were leaving from a karaoke place when we saw that guy harassing Yawang. When I wanted to approach them, that kid Xia Mu showed up. After you two left, I saw that guy still wanting to persist, and I was pretty drunk, so I told my friends to teach him a lesson. But then, they got beaten by him.¡± ¡°How many people were with you?¡± Xiao Xue asks. He lifts up his hand. ¡°Three men and two women. The two women saw us getting beaten up and got attracted from his good looks. My friends broke up with them that night.¡± Yawang looks at him disapprovingly. ¡°So useless.¡± ¡°Hey, he enlisted in the army before. Us regular citizens wouldn¡¯t be able to beat him. If I had known, I would have enlisted with Xiao Tian. Men should enlist to the army.¡± Jing Yu argues back. ¡°And then?¡± Xiao Xue asks. ¡°And then I told Xiao Tian.¡± He looks at them and they nod their heads, now knowing how Qu Wei Ran got beaten up. Yawang looks at Qu Wei Ran again. No wonder when Xiao Tian is here, he disappears like thin air. The three continue to talk until Xiao Xue suddenly points to a woman sitting at the table across from them. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°What is she drinking?¡± Jing Yu takes a glance at the woman. ¡°Champagne.¡± ¡°I want it too.¡± ¡°Do you want it, Yawang?¡± ¡°Sure.¡± He stands up again and walk towards the buffet area. Qu Wei Ran is standing by the champagne glasses, and there are only five glasses left on the table. Qu Wei Ran tilts his body to the side and smiles at Jing Yu. ¡°You first.¡± Jing Yu glares at him before taking two glasses away from the table. As he turns back to walk away, he didn¡¯t notice Qu Wei Ran lowering his head and lifting the corners of his lips into an evil smile. Zhang Jing Yu walks back to the table and hands over the two champagne glasses to the ladies. Xiao Xue drinks the alcohol in heartful gulps. ¡°Ah! Much more delicious than juice!¡± ¡°You can¡¯t drink it like that! You¡¯ll get drunk!¡± Jing Yu shouts as he pulls her arm away from drinking more. ¡°I don¡¯t mind being drunk.¡± She looks at him with twinkling eyes. Jing Yu¡¯s face immediately turns red. ¡°Xiao Xue!¡± ¡°Jing Yu!¡± The two hug each other tightly. So cheesy. Yawang shakes her head and stands up, unable to look at the two lovebirds. ¡°You two continue acting your drama, I¡¯m going to go grab something to eat.¡± She takes a clean dish and walks leisurely to the buffet area. She looks at the rows of delicious gourmet, indecisive of what to get. As she glance over the long table, she suddenly turn interested in the plate of egg custards. They are golden and flaky, which makes them look more appetizing. She walks forward, stretching her arms out to grab the tongs, but another hand grabs it before her. She turns her head and see it¡¯s Qu Wei Ran who is holding onto the tongs. He dips his head and smiles at her, then grabs the egg custard with the tongs before putting it onto her plate. ¡°Here.¡± Her whole body stiffens as she nods her head. ¡°Thank you.¡± She bites her lips after thanking him, cursing herself for her habit of thanking people ever since she was young. He looks like he¡¯s in a good mood as he starts to ask her questions like an old friend. ¡°So how¡¯ve you been?¡± ¡°Without you around, my days have been great.¡± ¡°Are you reminding me to look for you?¡± He teases. ¡°You!¡± She glares at him angrily. ¡°But what to do? I¡¯m no longer interested in you.¡± He says, folding his hands across his back as he smiles playfully at her. ¡°When I hear that from you, I¡¯m more happy from that compared to winning a five million dollar lottery.¡± He lowers his head as he smiles, noticing the ring on Yawang¡¯s ring finger. His eyes turn dark for a split second before he lifts his head back up. ¡°That¡¯s a pretty ring, Xiao Tian gave it to you?¡± Yawang nods. ¡°Yes, we¡¯re engaged.¡± ¡°Congratulations.¡± ¡°Thank you.¡± She bows her head slightly and turn her heels to walk away, but she seems to hear Qu Wei Ran saying something to her as she¡¯s walking away. _______________________________________________________________ Before Yawang reaches to her seat, she sees Jing Yu lifting Xiao Xue and helping her to walk. ¡°What happened?¡± She asks as she walks over to them. ¡°She really got drunk.¡± He answers in embarrassment, his face flushing a bright red. ¡°Oh¡­¡± She replies, wiggling her eyebrows and displaying a playful smile to him. He ignores her and rubs his nose. ¡°I¡¯m going to take her home first, need me to pick you up later?¡± ¡°No, it¡¯s alright, take care of her.¡± She laughs as she shakes her head. Jing Yu shakes his head as he talks. ¡°Then I¡¯m leaving, don¡¯t stay too late. Really, what kind of alcohol tolerance does she have, drunk already after one glass. Really¡­¡± ¡°Hurry up and hide your wolf tail already, I can¡¯t take it anymore.¡± She shakes her head in disapproval. He laughs and walks away, carrying Xiao Xue on his back. She sits alone on the table, looking at the dishes of uneaten food. She wiggles her eyebrows and lifts her fork to start eating. At times, her coworkers will drop by and chat with her. She will smile and nod her head while talking, clinking their champagne glasses together before drinking. She don¡¯t think champagne can make one drunk since it¡¯s like juice, Xiao Xue is just those types of people that get drunk without having to drink. _______________________________________________________________ When it¡¯s 8pm, the phone in her pocket starts to ring. It¡¯s Xiao Mu, she quickly picks up the call. ¡°Hello?¡± ¡°Were you looking for me?¡± ¡°Mhm, I wanted to invite you to dinner tonight, but¡­¡± She looks at the remaining food on her dish. ¡°I¡¯m already done eating.¡± She laughs. ¡°Oh.¡± He answers indifferently. ¡°Should I have Uncle Cheng pick you up?¡± ¡°No, it¡¯s alright, it¡¯s still early. I¡¯ll leave by myself.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± He didn¡¯t say anything afterwards. She waits for awhile, then speaks up. ¡°Then, I¡¯m going to hang up.¡± Xia Mu didn¡¯t reply back. She waits for a couple more minutes, and when she¡¯s about to hang up, Xia Mu starts to speak. ¡°Yawang, I miss you.¡± Yawang feels her heart fluttering slightly. She grips onto her phone tightly before answering back. ¡°Don¡¯t we see each other often?¡± ¡°It¡¯s not the same.¡± ¡°Xia Mu?¡± ¡°I feel that you¡¯re far away from me, very far away.¡± He says in a faint voice, but from his voice, she can imagine him in his small room with no lights on as the dark sky covers the windows. He is sitting on his bed, holding onto his propped knee loosely with one arm as he leans his back against the wall. He have his head down, his bangs covering his empty eyes, the light from the phone reflecting from his face. Yawang lowers her head when she feels her nose turning prickly. ¡°Yes, we are far away from each other.¡± There¡¯s silence from the other end. ¡°Xia Mu, don¡¯t miss me. It¡¯s impossible.¡± She closes her phone and gulps down the remaining champagne, a subtle pain hitting her heart. There are some things she intend to not remember, there are some things she intend to forget. Like that night, the tight embrace, the child who is unwilling to let go, the love confession, the things that are not supposed to happen. She tries to forget them, it¡¯s like if she forgets them, they can be like what they were before. A long time ago when her father told her about Xia Mu¡¯s past, she decided to take good care of him. A long time ago when Xia Mu tells her in a broken voice, ¡°My father often says I¡¯m his pride, my mom will often cry because of me.¡± She decided to become his family, giving him all the love he can get. However¡­.it turns out to be like this. Why does she have to hurt him? _______________________________________________________________ She stays still on her seat, her heart feeling heavy from the conversation. A bitter taste rises up from her throat and she feels a little dizzy. Her focus also starts to wander and she shakes her head, pressing her palm against her forehead. That¡¯s weird, I only drank one glass of champagne, with my alcohol tolerance, there¡¯s no way I¡¯m drunk this easily. Shu Yawang suddenly have a bad premonition, so she quickly stands up and wobbles forward. All of a sudden, an arm pulls her back and she stumbles to the person¡¯s embrace. She smells a men¡¯s cologne, and she lifts her head. The ceiling lights are reflected off to his necklace, causing Yawang to squint her eyes. She sees the man¡¯s profile, a handsome yet carries a hint of evil face looks back at her. His lips are formed into a concerned smile, his arms holding onto Yawang tightly as he speaks softly to her. ¡°Yawang, are you drunk?¡± His voice rumbled from his throat, his smile displaying his proud accomplishment. It¡¯s at the moment Yawang realizes what happened. ¡°What did you do to me?¡± Qu Wei Ran bends his waist and hugs Yawang tightly. ¡°Nothing much, I just added something to your drinks before that man took them away.¡± He murmurs in her ear. ¡°Get away from me!¡± She yells, trying to escape from his embrace. No wonder Xiao Xue is drunk so quickly, no wonder I¡¯m also¡­ ¡°You¡¯re telling me to go away?¡± He gaze at her lovingly in his embrace. ¡°Yawang, I told you before. You two will not get married, I won¡¯t let you two marry.¡± He lifts his arm and hands his credit card over to a server. ¡°My girlfriend drank too much, can you find a room for us, please?¡± Shu Yawang¡¯s heart is beating extremely fast, and she wants to say something, but she feels nauseous and nearly puke when she opens her mouth. The server retrieves the card and looks at Qu Wei Ran, not being suspicious at all from his elegant looks. ¡°Yes mister, please wait.¡± ¡°Let go of me.¡± She tries to push him away. She don¡¯t know what kind of drug he have given to her, but the nausea worsens and she vomits all over him. Qu Wei Ran frowns and pulls her slightly away from him. She keeps on vomitting and the server notices the scene as he returns. The server quickly hands over the room key to him and have him sign the receipt before finding someone to clean the mess. _______________________________________________________________ Qu Wei Ran carries Yawang to the elevator. As they are riding the elevator, the rising sensation causes her to vomit on him again. His eyebrows narrow and he sucks in his breath as he carries her into the room. He opens the bathroom door and dumps her into the bathtub. She feels dizzy from the throw, so he turns on the sprayer where a blast of cold water hits Yawang. She screams from the coldness and tries to get out from the bathtub, but Qu Wei Ran pushes her back in with one hand. ¡°What are you doing?!¡± She trembles from the cold water, looking at him frightenly. He takes off his eyeglasses and looks at her with a malicious gaze. ¡°I¡¯m going to clean you off, then eat you up.¡± _______________________________________________________________ ****** Shu Yawang scrambles to crawl out of the bathtub, and Qu Wei seems to enjoy watching her struggle. He laughs as he unbuttons his blazer, throwing it off to the side. He pushes her down with one hand as he pulls off his golden tie with the other, tying her hands with the tube part of the bathtub sprayer. ¡°No!¡± She struggles, her hands hitting against the golden faucet, making a piercing sound as she hits her hands against the wall. At that time, the water starts to heat up and steam starts to spread. He bends over and takes off her jacket, lifting her shirt up, exposing an exquisite corset wrapping around her body. He can¡¯t resist the temptation and stretches his arm out. Shu Yawang¡¯s eyes widen and she cries out, ¡°Stop! Stop!¡± He laughs and bends over, whispering in her ear. ¡°We didn¡¯t even start yet and you¡¯re crying already. Don¡¯t tell me¡­Xiao Tian haven¡¯t touched you ever since he came back?¡± She continues to cry as she struggles to escape. ¡°Let go of me! Let go!¡± He smiles at her, showing a very pleasant smile. ¡°From the looks of it, he really didn¡¯t touch you.¡± She throws him a strong glare. ¡°Qu Wei Ran! If you dare to touch me, I won¡¯t let this go! Ever!¡± ¡°You won¡¯t let this go, how so? Tell Xiao Tian to beat me up again? Or tell your dad to shoot me? Keep being stubborn, don¡¯t ask me to spare you afterwards!¡± He stands up afterwards, and all Yawang can hear is him unhooking his belt and unzipping his zipper. She trembles in fear and despair as he pulls her pants down. She inches backwards, but there¡¯s nowhere else to go. ¡°Help, help!¡± She screams aloud. ¡°No one can save you now!¡± He kisses her, imprinting his brutal proclamation. ¡°If I want a woman, I will have her, you are no exception.¡± He forcefully spreads her legs and climbs on top of her. ¡°Yawang, tonight is just the beginning¡­¡± The warm water splashes out from the tub as it follows his movements, the water drops hits against the floor like shattering glass. In the bathtub, all you can hear is the woman¡¯s sobbing and weakening voice as she asks him to stop and the man¡¯s lustful grunting. After some time, the sounds gradually stop. _______________________________________________________________ Late in the evening, Yawang curls up in the hotel¡¯s bed, hugging herself as she stares at the wall blankly. She¡¯s cold, hurt, and scared. The man beside her have his arm wrapped loosely on her waist, burying his face in her soft hair, sleeping soundly on the bed. Her eyes wander to her satchel and she slowly lifts the man¡¯s arm away from her, struggling to get up. When her feet touches the floor, her legs shake slightly, but she continues to walk forth towards her satchel. She bends down and unzips her satchel, revealing a red knife. It¡¯s one of her necessities for work, and she likes to put it in her satchel since it¡¯s convenient for her. Yawang turns her head and looks at the man coldly. She pushes the blade up slightly as she inches towards the bed. There is not even one ray of light entering the room, just like her eyes that are filled with hatred and vengeance. She will kill him for revenge of bringing pain and shame onto her body! She brings the knife close to his neck, gripping onto it with both hands. Her body is shaking slightly with fear, but she didn¡¯t back off. She will kill him, who cares if she will need to pay a bigger price for it? She lifts her hands, preparing to strike, the silver lighting of the blade flashes as it travels down, causing the man on the bed to open his eyes. He quickly grab her wrists with one hand to stop her, but the knife already makes a cut on his neck, his blood slowly oozing out from the laceration. His eyebrows narrow from the pain and he pulls her towards him, having her lie on top of him. Then he flips her over and squeezes her wrist, making her loosen her grip of the knife. He picks up the knife and looks at the sharp blade, then looks back at her. The blood continues to flow down his neck, dripping onto her face, making it look like red tears as it rolls down her face. He gently wipes the blood away from her face, his touch causing her to tremble in fear. ¡°I thought you wouldn¡¯t be able to do this.¡± ¡°Are you kidding me? I want to cut you up in a million pieces.¡± He throws the knife away and touches his neck, it¡¯s not a deep cut, so he don¡¯t feel anything from it. He suddenly starts to laugh and hold onto Yawang. ¡°Look, you made me bleed too.¡± He kisses her cheek softly. ¡°Now we¡¯re even.¡± ¡°Let go of me.¡± From the position they¡¯re in, she¡¯s terrified of what¡¯s going to happen. ¡°Yawang-ah¡­¡± He kisses the ends of her eyebrows and the corner of her lips. ¡°I¡¯ll take responsibility, okay? I¡¯ll marry you.¡± She hits him with both hands. ¡°Go die! You go die!¡± Her refusal infuriates Qu Wei Ran as he glares at her. ¡°Since you have enough strength to hit me, you should have enough strength to play with me.¡± He lowers his head, holding onto her hands tightly as he tears her bathrobe with his mouth and slides his tongue all over her body. Yawang¡¯s tears gather up into a pool in her eyes, ready to be poured down on her face. ¡°I will sue you, definitely will sue you!¡± ¡°Go ahead, I¡¯m not afraid.¡± Qu Wei Ran is enjoying the sexual pleasures from her, he can¡¯t deny that her body fascinates him. Her throat hurts from all the crying and screaming, her lips are sore from the biting, and her hands loosen their grip as her eyes loses their expressions. Her life, her happiness, they all crash down before you. They¡¯re like those colorful bubbles, floating in the air until they burst right before her eyes. Chapter 11: Yawang, don’t cry (pt. 1) Chapter 11: Yawang, don¡¯t cry (pt. 1) Shu Yawang slides down to the floor as she leans her back against the door. She bites her lips and covers her ears, opening her mouth wide to scream, but no sound comes out. _______________________________________________________________ The next day, Yawang exits out of the hotel with Qu Wei Ran following behind her. He is back wearing that suit and that pair of rimless glasses, recovering his elegant looks. He bends his waist and rests his arm against the cab window as he looks at Yawang. ¡°If you want me to take responsibility, call me anytime. If you want to sue me, I will be willing to wait.¡± The cab driver¡¯s eyes glance over between the two. ¡°Drive.¡± Shu Yawang tell the driver coldly. During the ride, Yawang sits idly, her eyes staring blankly at the view before her, feeling lost in her thoughts. She knows she will sue him, she will never forgive him, she have to sue him! But she¡¯s really tired, her whole body hurts, she wants to go home. Home now seems so far away, why is she feeling exhausted? She didn¡¯t notice she arrive to her destination until the driver speaks up. She gets out of the car and looks at the military compound before her. It seems like she got suck into a time warp as she walks towards the entrance. As she walks down the path in the compound, various scenes pop into her mind. When she was young, she would run down the path with Xiao Tian chasing after her. The two young children laugh and smile as they run in a carefree manner. When they were going to school, they will ride their bicycles together along the path. She will always rest her hand onto his shoulder and tell him to go faster. He will lower his head and laugh, bending his body forward and pedal faster, hearing Yawang¡¯s laughter as she grips onto his shoulder tightly. When they are separated, Xiao Tian threw his red carnation to Yawang. The red carnation flips in the air before landing onto her hand. She remembers him shouting at her, ¡°Yawang, you have to wait for me!¡± She holds onto the red carnation and have his words imprinted in her heart. Yawang, you have to wait for me! She suddenly stops and her tears start to flow down from her face. She stares at the road before her, unable to move. The afternoon sun shines brightly onto her, but she don¡¯t feel any warmth from it. She crouches down and hugs her knees as she lowers her head. The stone on the ring reflects from the sunlight, making the light shine in every direction. The light pierces her eyes, and she quickly cover her ring and closes her eyes, trying to suppress her pain. No, this feels more worse than pain. It¡¯s mixed with shame, ridicule, and fear that is hitting Yawang in the heart. She can¡¯t breathe, she really wants to die. Once she thinks of Xiao Tian, she just wants to die. What to do? Xiao Tian, how can I face you? You love me so much, you adored me so much, yet now I¡¯m¡­ She tightens her grip around herself and bites onto her lips hard, digging her nails into her flesh as a wailing sound escapes from her throat. She continues to crouch down on the road, not being able to see or hear anything. She feels she¡¯s going to break down any minute. _______________________________________________________________ She don¡¯t know how long she have been crouching down until her legs feel numb, yet she don¡¯t want to stand up. Moments later, a car drives past her, then goes into reverse, and stops before her. A pair of white sneakers appears in front of her and a young man kneels down before her, looking at her with a worried expression. ¡°What happened?¡± It took some time for Shu Yawang to lift her head and look back at him. The sunlight shines behind him, making him looking like a beautiful and pure angel. She feels her nose turning prickly and quickly lowers her head, not wanting him to see her like this. ¡°Yawang?¡± Xia Mu¡¯s voice trembles with worry. ¡°Were you crying?¡± ¡°No, I wasn¡¯t crying,¡± She answers with her eyes staring at the ground, trying to hold back her tears. ¡°Xia Mu, can you carry me home? My stomach hurts.¡± He turns silent, lowering his gaze at her before turning his body. ¡°Get up.¡± Yawang sucks in her breath as she climbs onto Xia Mu¡¯s skinny frame. Xia Mu lifts her up with ease and starts walking down the path in wide strides. The leaves on the trees whistle a tune as the breeze runs past them, the sunlight shining through the gaps of the leaves from the trees. She bites onto her lips and grip onto his shoulders tightly when she feels a pang hitting her heart. Xia Mu¡¯s eyes flash slightly and he purses his lips. _______________________________________________________________ When Yawang opens the door of her home and is about to tell Xia Mu to leave, her mom quickly walk over and start yelling. ¡°You bad girl! Not coming home last night, you worried me! What happened? You didn¡¯t even pick up your phone, where were you?!¡± Yawang looks at Xia Mu and shakes her head. ¡°No¡­¡± ¡°Where were you last night?!¡± Her mom shuts the door and glares at Yawang whose head is down. ¡°Did you know your dad sent people searching for you?!¡± ¡°I¡¯m¡­I¡¯m fine.¡± She answers, her long hair shielding her empty eyes. She don¡¯t even know how can she deny it so quickly. Xia Mu continues to look at her with worry when she clasps her hands together, turning around to walk to the bathroom. ¡°I¡¯m going to use the bathroom.¡± She immediately closes the door and locks it. Her mom knocks onto the door as she continues to shout. ¡°Yawang, try to see what happens if you don¡¯t tell me what happened last night! You think you¡¯re all grown up now? You¡¯re an engaged woman, what will happen if the Tang family knows about this? Xia Mu, go home first!¡± She leans her back against the door as she slowly slides down to the floor. She bites her lips and covers her ears, opening her mouth wide to scream, but no sound comes out. She lifts her gaze and suddenly sees the family bathtub. She suddenly feels cold and starts to shake. As she looks at the bathtub, the memories of that night starts to play in her mind. She reaches out for anything nearby and starts throwing them towards the bathtub. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Ah! Ah! Ah!!!¡± She can¡¯t take it anymore, she starts to scream and shout as she throws things towards the bathtub. Yawang¡¯s mom and Xia Mu look at each other, and her heart clenches, like she seem to realize what happened. She bangs onto the door as she cries out, ¡°Yawang, are you okay? Yawang, open the door!¡± ¡°Yawang, let Mom in. Yawang¡­¡± Xia Mu pulls her mom away and starts to kick the door with his leg. The door opens after a few kicks and they see her continue to throw things at the bathtub. Her eyes are constantly wandering and her hands are flowing with blood, she don¡¯t even know how that happened. Her mom quickly wrap her arms around her into a hug. ¡°Yawang, are you okay? Did someone¡­did something to you?¡± Yawang calms down after hearing the question, her tears streaming down her face when she can¡¯t hold them back any longer. Her mom looks at her daughter¡¯s tear-stained face with tears brimming in her eyes. She lifts her daughter¡¯s head up and combs her hair away from her face, revealing a bright, red hickey on her neck. Her mom suddenly feels dizzy, and she is unable to maintain her balance. ¡°Yawang, Yawang.¡± She cries as she hugs Yawang, patting her back and comforting her. ¡°Yawang, my baby, it¡¯s okay. Don¡¯t be scared, Mom is here. Mom will protect you.¡± Yawang hugs her mom back and wail like a child. ¡°Mom, tell someone to get rid of the bathtub, get rid of the bathtub!¡± ¡°I will, I will have them get rid of it right away.¡± Xia Mu, who is standing beside them the whole time, clenches his fists tightly with his cold, piercing gaze as he asks her, ¡°Who was it? Who was it?!¡± He crouches down and clutches onto Yawang¡¯s shoulders. ¡°Who did this?!¡± She shakes her head, she can¡¯t tell him. ¡°Was it that man? That man that keeps on harassing you, Qu Wei Ran?!¡± Her eyes widen as she looks at him frightfully. ¡°It¡¯s him.¡± Xia Mu confirms. Yawang reaches her arm out for him, he steps back. ¡°Last night, it was last night.¡± His eyes burn with anger as he clenches his teeth. Why did he not bring his phone with him yesterday? Why didn¡¯t he pick up her call? Why didn¡¯t he insist in picking her up? Why?! He swiftly turns his body and storms out of their home. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Xia Mu, what are you doing?¡± Yawang stands up and chases after him, following him down the stairs. Xia Mu storms to his home and into his room and opens his private drawer, retrieving something from it. It hits against the wood and makes a dull sound. He takes out a black object and stuffs it into his pocket. He storms out of his room and runs towards the car. Uncle Cheng, who is resting in the car looks at him in suspicion. ¡°Xia Mu, what are you-¡± He didn¡¯t get to finish asking when Xia Mu opens the door and pulls him out from the car, sitting himself onto the driver seat. He ignores Uncle Cheng¡¯s yelling and slams the door close. He swiftly turns on the car and steps onto the accelerator, driving away. ¡°Xia Mu, where are you going? That car cannot leave the military compound!¡± He shouts as he chases after the car. He stops after running a couple steps, turning suspicious. ¡°That kid, I shouldn¡¯t have taught him how to drive.¡± As Xia Mu drives out of the compound, Yawang notices the car and chases after it, her hand hitting against the car to have him stop. Xia Mu didn¡¯t notice her and continues to drive out to the road. ¡°Xia Mu.¡± She continues to run towards the car who is slowly disappearing from her sight. When it disappears, she stops and breathes heavily, her sweat running down her face. What to do? Even though Xia Mu is expressionless and looks calm most of the time, when he gets angry, who knows what kind of crazy thing he will do? Especially to that bastard, Qu Wei Ran. If those two get into a fight, Xia Mu will be injured. She runs out to the main entrance and calls out for a cab, telling the driver to go to Hyde Industrial Group after giving him the address. She looks at the front with her fists clenched tight, her body shaking with fear. She regrets telling Xia Mu the address. Xia Mu, please be okay! Chapter 11: Yawang, don’t cry (pt. 2) Chapter 11: Yawang, don¡¯t cry (pt. 2) When the cab arrives to the front of Hyde Industrial Group, Shu Yawang rushes out and pushes the glass door open, making a beeline towards Qu Wei Ran¡¯s office. She is a couple meters away from his office when she suddenly hears a gunshot behind her. She whips her head around and freeze in position. Her breathing stops and the whole office building turn silent. Bang. Another gunshot is fired, and it seem to awaken the company employees. They all start to scream and run out of the meeting room. Yawang also snaps back to reality and she bites her lips nervously when she feels her hands turning cold. She leans against the wall as she tries to move towards the meeting room when everyone is trying to run away. When she reaches the meeting room, all she can see is a handsome young man with his arm raised, holding onto a gun. His blank eyes stare at the man on the chair. The man is wearing a suit, a pair of golden-rimmed glasses resting on the bridge of his nose. He is paralyzed on the chair, his eyes shut tight as blood flows out from his wound. The blood drips down to the floor, staining the young man¡¯s white shoes red. Yawang¡¯s mind goes blank as she stares at the scene before her with widen eyes and trembling lips. In the room, it¡¯s stenched with blood and Xia Mu is frozen in position, his right cheek being hit with blood. His face does not reveal any expression, but the slight trembling of his hand shows his current emotions. Yawang slowly walks towards them, bending her body forward to look at Qu Wei Ran who is sitting on the chair. She lifts up her hand and places a finger under his nose, and then she quickly pulls her hand away. She covers her mouth, about to cry. He killed someone, he really killed someone for her! She raises her head and looks at Xia Mu who is still frozen in position. She stands back up shakily, lifting her arm and taking the gun away from his hand. She holds onto his hand and coughs out his name. ¡°Xia Mu¡­¡± Her voice awakens him, and his eyes wander to her. Tears start to stream down her face. ¡°Yawang, don¡¯t cry.¡± He lifts his hand and wipes the tears away. ¡°No one will bully you now, no one will!¡± Her heart starts to burn in an uncomfortable way. She cries and extends her arms out, hugging Xia Mu and crying. ¡°Xia Mu, Xia Mu¡­¡± _______________________________________________________________ At the winter of her twenty-second year, she is standing in the crossroads of police cars and ambulances. The young man she held in her embrace is being taken away in handcuffs. She follows the police car, her cries sounding exhausted. From then on, she feels her life is being shattered into pieces, it can never be put back exactly the way it was before. She sits on the bed lifelessly and hugs herself. Her pants have some blood stain on it and she stares at her hands blankly. She bites onto her fingers and her body shakes continuously with fear. Ten days, it¡¯s been ten days since Xia Mu was arrested. The situation seems to heading towards the worst case scenario; Qu Wei Ran have lost an abundant amount of blood and is currently in a deep coma in the hospital. The doctor announce he will mostly likely be in a vegetative state. Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father cannot bear the possibility of losing another son, so he goes crazy to take revenge on the imprisoned Xia Mu. He have the security footage of the incident published online, the topic of a child of a military official killing someone with a gun quickly spreads in the online community. The netizens who never thinks of consequences after typing their comments spread the slogan ¡°One life for another life!¡±. His father spends extravagantly to have the television station report this news for three days, causing an uproar of dissatisfaction from the general public. The chief of the Public Security Bureau regards this case very highly, refusing to meet anyone that is sent from the Xia family, making them unable to bail Xia Mu out. Commander Xia originally asked Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father to settle this before having this case going to court, but the father reply back, ¡°Commander Xia, I think you understand the pain of losing your son at an old age. This pain can not be settled in whatever way possible.¡± His reply exhibits his determination, if Qu Wei Ran really dies, he will spend his whole fortune to make sure Xia Mu goes to jail! _______________________________________________________________ Everyone in the Xia family villa is quiet, Yawang¡¯s father standing outside of the living room as Commander Xia talks with the lawyer with a frozen face and clasped hands. ¡°Lawyer Liu, how do you think the court will sentence this case?¡± The lawyer inhales deeply as he narrows his eyebrows. ¡°In this case, if Qu Wei Ran really does die, then he will definitely be charged with murder. In this country¡¯s law, juveniles will not be put into death penalty. They will be sentenced according to the law, the worst case scenario being life imprisonment and the lightest sentence will be imprisonment for fifteen years. If he doesn¡¯t die, then he will be charged with illegal possession of gun and attempted murder. That two charges will lead to at least six years of imprisonment, but it really depends on the judge.¡± Commander Xia turns silent for awhile before turning his head back. ¡°How confident are you to have them place the lightest sentence?¡± The lawyer pushes his glasses back. ¡°Depends if the man in hospital is going to die or not. Commander Xia, you can also go to the city procuratorate and find the judge who is in charge of this case. Even though there are clear evidence, it¡¯s the judge who decides the length of the sentence.¡± ¡°The plaintiff is grasping onto the case tightly, will they ask for a heavier sentence?¡± The lawyer shakes his head. ¡°The victims usually sue for civil damages, it have nothing to do with criminal liability. The only thing they can request for is higher compensation.¡± Commander Xia nods his head at the lawyer¡¯s reply. ¡°I understand, you may head back. I¡¯m sorry for troubling you with this case.¡± ¡°Not at all, it¡¯s no trouble, Commander Xia.¡± The lawyer packs his files and stands up, tilting his head and bending his waist to a slight bow. Commander Xia nods his head and Lawyer Liu turns his heels and exits out. ¡°Xiao Cheng.¡± ¡°Yes, Commander?¡± Uncle Cheng asks as he appears in front of Commander Xia. ¡°What did Judge Wang say?¡± ¡°Judge Wang said he will try his best.¡± ¡°What does trying his best mean?!¡± He pounds his fists onto the coffee table. ¡°See what happens if he dare to sentence Xia Mu to prison!¡± ¡°Commander, I heard that Qu Tian Yong (Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father) are giving out gifts to the court prosecutors.¡± Commander Xia looks at him coldly. ¡°But no one dare to receive it.¡± ¡°Keep finding other judges, try to delay the case as far as they can. Don¡¯t let it enter the judicial process, wait until the news die down first.¡± ¡°Yes.¡± After Uncle Cheng leaves, Yawang¡¯s father lowers his head in guilt. ¡°Commander Xia, this is my fault.¡± Commander Xia clenches on his fist and pounds it on the table, lecturing Yawang¡¯s father with an angry voice. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Shu Quan! (Yawang¡¯s father) I hand over Xia Mu to you to teach him, and you taught him to become a loyal dog! He will jump and bite whoever bullies your daughter, you had done a good job teaching him! Well done!¡± After his angry spurt, he pounds his fist onto the table before standing up and leaving the room. Yawang¡¯s father clenches his jaw as he lowers his head, breathing deeply to control his temper. On the twentieth day since Xia Mu was arrested, the doctor announced Qu Wei Ran¡¯s brain have an extreme shortage of blood and oxygen, thus leading him in a deep unconscious or coma state, and declared him to be in a vegetative state. On the twenty-fourth day, the Qu family uses all the connections they have to urge the court to have the case go under judicial process as soon as possible, determined to put Xia Mu in jail! On the twenty-sixth day, Shu Yawang finds out that she¡¯s pregnant¡­ _______________________________________________________________ In the intensive care room, a man is lying on the bed peacefully with a respirator. His cheeks are sunken, but he still looks handsome nevertheless. Shu Yawang looks at him behind the glass. She stares at the man with her cold eyes, not moving away from her position until she hears footsteps coming towards her. ¡°What are you doing here?!¡± A hoarse voice shouts behind her. She turns her head and looks at him, she seen him before in the work dinner. He looked like a successful businessman then, but now he looks like he aged twenty years, his head full of white hair instead of black with an exhausted look on his face. She lowers her gaze and reaches her hand out for a handshake. Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father looks at her with hatred, he heard his son was hurt because of this woman. He can¡¯t believe that he, Qu Tian Yong, will experience the pain of losing two sons at an old age! The Qu family line will come to an end! ¡°Get out,¡± He bellows out, pointing his finger to the door. ¡°My son don¡¯t want to see you.¡± She looks down to the floor and murmurs out, ¡°I¡¯m pregnant.¡± His father is in shock. ¡°It¡¯s your son¡¯s.¡± He widens his eyes in disbelief. ¡°You¡¯re¡­.you¡¯re telling the truth?¡± She nods her head. He grasps onto her shoulders tightly. ¡°What conditions do you want to be able to give birth? Money is not a problem!¡± She inhales deeply, then lifts her head up. ¡°Let go of Xia Mu.¡± He gives her a sharp glare. ¡°No, if I let go of him now, what happens if you don¡¯t give birth?¡± ¡°If you don¡¯t let go of him, I will definitely not give birth.¡± His father¡¯s eyes wander from side to side as he thinks of what to do. ¡°Alright, I¡¯ll agree to it for now. But I will speak to your father about the conditions.¡± Yawang laughs sarcastically. ¡°Is that necessary?¡± He gives a cunning laugh. ¡°Of course, you youngsters change your minds so often, I will be worried.¡± ¡°Whatever you like.¡± After she gives her reply, she leaves the room. Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father rubs his hands excitedly, looking at Qu Wei Ran behind the glass. ¡°Wei Ran, this is great, you have a kid. Our family line will not come to an end. This woman made you become this, I will definitely not let her live well. Wei Ran, Dad will avenge her for you.¡± _______________________________________________________________ Three days later, Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father presents his conditions: - Yawang must marry Qu Wei Ran. - After the child turns one year old, she can ask for a divorce. After the divorce, she cannot claim any fortune from them. - During the pregnancy and breastfeeding period, she must stay in the Qu family¡¯s residence. Yawang¡¯s mother looks at the conditions and immediately stands up to protest. ¡°No! I will not agree to these! I will not have Yawang give birth to that bastard¡¯s child unless I die! Even on my deathbed, I will not let her to do this!¡± Yawang¡¯s father smokes lifelessly on his chair, the ashtray full of cigarette butts. Her mother walks over to him and gives him a slight push. ¡°Say something! Honey, you can¡¯t, you can¡¯t agree to this. If you agree to this, Yawang¡¯s life will be ruined.¡± Shu Yawang is curled up on the couch, her eyes staring ahead, her right hand unknowingly reaching over to the ring on her ring finger of her left hand. Her father pushes the cigarette onto the ashtray, extinguishing the smoke from it. ¡°I can¡¯t have Xia Mu go to jail.¡± He speaks in a gloomy voice. Her mother hits him in anger. ¡°Are you crazy?! Yawang is your daughter! If you want to repay your debt, do it yourself, don¡¯t drag my daughter into it! Don¡¯t even think about it!¡± His eyes turn red, letting her mother continue to hit him. She keeps on hitting him until tears run down her face. She walks over to the couch and hugs Yawang. ¡°Don¡¯t be scared Yawang, I won¡¯t have you have that child. Mom will go with you to abort the baby tomorrow! We will get rid of that dirty thing tomorrow! It¡¯s okay Yawang, don¡¯t be scared.¡± Yawang¡¯s nose prickles and her eyes redden. ¡°Mom, I¡¯m going to give birth to this child.¡± Her mother lifts her hand and slaps her arm. ¡°Are you crazy? Do you know what you¡¯re saying right now? Giving birth, you think it¡¯s easy?¡± Yawang shuts her eyes. ¡°Mom, I cannot ignore Xia Mu, he did this because of me¡­¡± ¡°What do you mean he did this because of you! You didn¡¯t tell him to use a gun to murder someone! It¡¯s not your fault, why are you the one suffering the consequences¡­¡± She slumps down to the floor and cries. Yawang hugs her knees together and weeps softly. Her mother sits up on the couch and rocks Yawang. ¡°Yawang, are you sure about this? You don¡¯t want Xiao Tian? Didn¡¯t you like him ever since you were little? Didn¡¯t you always want to marry him? If you give birth to a child of another man, how are you going to get married?¡± Yawang lifts her head and smiles bitterly. ¡°Mom, how can I marry him in this state? I don¡¯t deserve him.¡± Her mother hugs her as she cries, ¡°Hush! What do you mean you don¡¯t deserve him? Don¡¯t think of such things, we can hide this. The Tang family knows nothing of this, and even if they do, Xiao Tian¡­.he won¡¯t look down on you.¡± He won¡¯t? Yawang bites onto her lip and looks at the ring, then forcefully pulls it out. Even if he won¡¯t look down on me, I¡¯ll look down on myself! ¡°Mom, I already made my decision.¡± She ignores her mother¡¯s cries and leave the room, walking to her bedroom and closing the door, closing off her mother¡¯s cries and father¡¯s silence. _______________________________________________________________ During the evening in the barracks, two shadows swiftly runs behind the trees, making a stop in front of an office building. One of the shadows murmurs out, ¡°Xiao Tian, are we really going to sneak inside?¡± Tang Xiao Tian looks around his surroundings and nods. ¡°Of course, why else are we out here in the middle of the night?¡± ¡°No, if we get caught, we will get punished. We¡¯re going to graduate soon¡­¡± ¡°If you¡¯re scared, then go back. I have to make a phone call tonight.¡± He pushes a tree branch away and starts to climb on the back wall of the office building. ¡°Ah, Xiao Tian, wait for me!¡± The shadow behind him quickly follows Xiao Tian. What rotten luck! Their school¡¯s graduation practice is abnormal; they will lock the students in a confined space and confiscates all their phones, forbidding any contact with the outside world. For a month, they¡¯ve been battling and practicing, and they still have to endure it for another two weeks. When Xiao Tian climbs up to the third floor, he reaches out for a pen in his pocket and picks the lock on the window. ¡°Xiao Tian, if you want to be a thief, you¡¯ll be an exceptional one.¡± His comrade comments. Xiao Tian chuckles and opens the windows, entering through the opening. There is a desk inside the room, and he quickly notices the telephone lying on top. He immediately dials Yawang¡¯s cell phone number, but it went straight to voicemail. He narrows his eyebrows and dials her house number. ¡°Hello?¡± Yawang¡¯s mother answers. ¡°Hi Auntie, this is Xiao Tian. Is Yawang home?¡± ¡°She¡¯s home.¡± She muffles out hesistantly. ¡°Auntie, may I speak with her?¡± ¡°Um¡­she¡¯s sick.¡± ¡°Yawang is sick? Is it serious?¡± He asks in a worried tone. There¡¯s silence at the other line. ¡°Auntie, please say something. Is it serious? She hadn¡¯t written any letters to me for a month, is it bad?¡± ¡°No, it¡¯s not serious. Don¡¯t worry about it and keep studying. When you come back, she¡¯ll be fine then.¡± Xiao Tian wants to keep talking, but his comrade pokes him to tell him to hang up. He still needs to use the phone, if they stay here any longer, they¡¯ll be put in a dangerous situation! Xiao Tian hangs up and lets his comrade use the telephone, deciding to call again after he¡¯s done. However, shortly after his comrade is connected to the other line, they hear a shout from outside of the office. ¡°Who¡¯s in there?!¡± Xiao Tian and his comrade quickly flees from the scene in fear and runs back to their dorm. The two pants heavily as they reach their dorm, trying to catch their breath. ¡°Such rotten luck, I just spoke a few words with my girlfriend and people already caught us!¡± Xiao Tian furrows his eyebrows, making a worried expression. ¡°What happened?¡± ¡°My girlfriend is sick, I want to request a leave of absence to go home.¡± ¡°Are you crazy? Requesting a leave of absence at this time? Do you not want to graduate?¡± ¡°But Yawang is sick..¡± He makes a fist with his hands anxiously. ¡°What did her family say?¡± ¡°Her mom said she¡¯s fine.¡± He answers with narrowed eyebrows. ¡°Then it¡¯ll be fine. Wait until our graduation practice is over, she will definitely be better then. Don¡¯t worry.¡± He shakes his head and quickens his steps. ¡°No, you don¡¯t understand. I¡¯m feeling anxious right now, it¡¯s been like this for awhile. I¡¯m really worried.¡± His comrade looks at him with a worried look. ¡°Don¡¯t scare yourself. If it¡¯s really bad, her family would have told you. Besides, she wasn¡¯t feeling that well when you came here. It¡¯s not like she¡¯s going to die right away¡­¡± Xiao Tian turns his head back and throws him a glare. His comrade pats him on the shoulder to comfort him. ¡°Ah, just two more weeks. It¡¯ll fly by quickly, it¡¯ll be okay.¡± This is the first time Tang Xiao Tian hates being a soldier. He hates how he have no freedom! He looks out to the evening sky with a worried face. Yawang¡­how are you? What happened? Why am I feeling worried? Why does my heart feel so painful? _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang gently spreads open her hands and look at the ring resting on her palm. The diamond on the ring shines brightly against the moonlight. She looks at it for awhile before putting it in a box and locking it in her drawer. That ring that once brought her an indescribable feeling of joy, that ring that once brought her the greatest happiness, she don¡¯t deserve to wear that anymore¡­ Money makes everything easier; even though Qu Wei Ran is in a vegetative state, his family are able to easily produce a marriage certificate. Yawang just needs to sign on the certificate and she will become Qu Wei Ran¡¯s wife. In the hospital room, Yawang looks down at the marriage certificate. After awhile, she picks up a pen and signs her name. She leans her back against her chair and looks at the signed certificate. Before, she thought that the name beside her¡¯s would be someone else, but in reality, it¡¯s not¡­ Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father, who is sitting across from her, gives her a scornful look. ¡°Don¡¯t have that unwilling look on your face. If my son wasn¡¯t in this state and you¡¯re pregnant with his child, I would not allow you to marry him.¡± She looks back at him with a scornful look as well. His father takes the certificate away from her. ¡°From now on, you will stay here.¡± She ignores him like he¡¯s not even there. Now, she understands Xia Mu¡¯s feelings, she understands why he will be so calm, why he won¡¯t interact with others, why he always have that expressionless look on his face. ¡°When are you going to let go of Xia Mu?¡± She suddenly asks. ¡°Oh, the Xia family already bailed him out after you signed the certificate.¡± Yawang sighs in relief. ¡°Good, he¡¯s back home.¡± Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father stands up from his seat. ¡°I did what I promised, so you better keep your word. If you decide to do anything and cause the Qu bloodline to die out, don¡¯t blame me for any future consequences.¡± He walks out of the room and shuts the door swiftly. She glares at his back coldly as he leaves. She removes her shoes and curls her body onto the couch, staring at Qu Wei Ran who is lying on the hospital bed in front of her. He lies there silently, his face being covered with a respirator, the ECG flashing out a fluctuating wave. She tilts her head, looking like she¡¯s been possessed, and climbs down from the couch. She walk towards the bed and extends her arm out, pressing her hand against the respirator on his face. Her gloomy eyes stare down at him as she grasps onto the respirator tightly. She is about to pull it off when a hand suddenly stops her. ¡°What are you doing?¡± Yawang turns her head and sees a man wearing a black suit standing behind her. He forcefully pulls her arm away and checks the hospital equipment to see if it¡¯s still working, then pulls Yawang away from the bed. ¡°Miss, what you just did before can be considered as attempted murder.¡± ¡°Sue me then, take me to jail.¡± She does not look like a flustered criminal getting caught in the act. The man narrows his eyebrows at Yawang¡¯s arrogance. ¡°Miss, my name is Lu Pei Gang, and I am Mr. Qu¡¯s caretaker. Maybe you haven¡¯t noticed, but I¡¯ve been sitting behind where you¡¯re standing right now. I will be sitting there from now on, so please do not commit this type of act again.¡± _______________________________________________________________ Yawang shrugs her shoulders, completely ignoring his words. She turns her heels and walks back to the couch, sitting on the chair nearby. The sunlight shines through the window and she tilts her head to welcome the warmth. She closes her eyes and feel the weak, yet peaceful sunlight. Lu Pei Gang looks at Yawang¡¯s profile and scratches his head. This woman is strange, even since she stepped into the room, her eyes are blank. Other than the time she looked at the marriage certificate with hesitation, she was expressionless the whole time. Even when she tried to take the respirator off from Mr. Qu, she was expressionless. In this room, there¡¯s a person in a vegetative state, a person who doesn¡¯t speak, and a person who doesn¡¯t know what to speak of. Lu Pei Gang thinks his job will make him depressed. ¡°What date is today?¡± Yawang suddenly asks. Lu Pei Gang is stunned from her sudden words and scratches his head as he thinks. ¡°April 30th.¡± Her eyes move slightly, then she lowers her head. ¡°He¡¯s going to be back soon.¡± She murmurs softly. ¡°Who?¡± Yawang buries her face on her knees. ¡°I wish he won¡¯t come back. Never ever come back.¡± Lu Pei Gang turns more suspicious of this woman.Sometimes she will look arrogant and cold, and at other times she will look sad and pitiful. He looks at her as she continues to murmur to herself, ¡°Don¡¯t come back, I¡¯m scared that he will come back. Please don¡¯t come back.¡± She can¡¯t face him, if he knows about this, she will want to die! Shu Yawang realizes how much of a coward she is, a weak coward. Lu Pei Gang can¡¯t take her constant muttering anymore. ¡°Hey pregnant lady, don¡¯t get agitated.¡± She ignores him and buries her head down. Lu Pei Gang scratches his head and looks at the time, it¡¯s time for the routine check-up. He grabs a book and head towards the bed, checking the hospital equipment to make sure they¡¯re performing efficiently. Then, he puts the book down and sits near the bed, pulling Qu Wei Ran¡¯s arm gently. He starts to massage his arm to prevent his muscles contracting, as a caretaker, he needs to perform a full body massage four times daily. _______________________________________________________________ After massaging for half an hour, Lu Pei Gang stops as his muscles ache. Massaging a strong yet unconscious man is tiring. He stands up and wipes off the sweat on the corner of his forehead and is about to resume his massaging when he suddenly sees a finger moving slightly. Lu Pei Gang holds his breath and holds onto Qu Wei Ran¡¯s hand as he waits patiently. He sees the finger moving again. ¡°His hand is moving.¡± He says excitedly. Yawang lifts her head and looks at him in suspicion. ¡°It¡¯s true, it¡¯s really moving.¡± She stands up and curls her hands into a fist. ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°He¡¯s going to wake up.¡± She takes a step back, staring at him in disbelief. ¡°No, you¡¯re lying¡­¡± Lu Pei Gang ignores her and pushes the button on top of the hospital bed. Soon, three doctors dressed in a white gown rushes in the room and crowd around the bed, observing the patient. Yawang bites onto her fingers as she looks at them nervously. No, don¡¯t wake up! She really don¡¯t want him to wake up, at least not until the child is born. Don¡¯t wake up! Don¡¯t wake up! Don¡¯¡¯t wake up! Don¡¯t! ¡°This is a miracle! He¡¯s starting to recover consciousness. I think within three days, he will fully recover!¡± Yawang lets go of the finger that is bleeding from her bite and slumps down like a deflated balloon. Yawang has always been a happy person: she have a loving family, a boy who she likes, an adorable younger brother, and great friends. In her twenty-two years of her life, she gets whatever she wants. She thinks, maybe because she has too much, so now, she is suffering. Lu Peng Gang extends his arm and shakes Yawang. ¡°Are you alright?¡± She slowly awakens from the shaking and she looks at him. ¡°If he wakes up, will the Qu family not care about the baby?¡± ¡°You¡¯re worried about that? Didn¡¯t you know? Your brother¡¯s second shot hit his area.¡± ¡°Where?¡± She asks, giving him an odd look. ¡°There. It¡¯s going to be hard for him reproduce.¡± He rubs his chin before continuing. ¡°But since medical technology is advancing, there should be a way to fix it. Don¡¯t worry, Mr. Qu is a smart man, he will not take risks. Rather than anticipating for the advancement of medical technology, they would rather have you give birth to be safe.¡± She looks at him and nods. ¡°Thank you.¡± Lu Peng Gang scratches his head and smiles. _______________________________________________________________ There¡¯s an old saying that good people do not live long and disasters last for centuries. This saying fits Qu Wei Ran perfectly. After two days, Qu Wei Ran opens his eyes and when he sees Shu Yawang standing in front of him, his eyes widen in surprise. ¡°Why are you here?¡± She looks back at him and laughs coldly. ¡°I¡¯m your wife now, of course I have to be here.¡± He can¡¯t help it, but to smile when he hears her reply. His dry lips crack and starts to bleed. ¡°I¡¯m curious of what happened, but no matter what, I¡¯m happy.¡± She laughs cruelly at him. ¡°What? Don¡¯t you know? You¡¯re an eunuch now! Or should I say sterile?¡± Qu Wei Ran¡¯s face is suddenly twisted and he widens his eyes. ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°I mean literally.¡± Qu Wei Ran suddenly struggles to sit up, wanting to see his body, but he can¡¯t move. All he can do is shout and scream. Lu Peng Gang runs to his side and holds him down. ¡°Mr. Qu! Stay still!¡± When Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father walk in, he sees all the commotion and rushes to his son¡¯s side. ¡°What happened?¡± ¡°Dad! Why did you save me? I rather die in this state!¡± ¡°Wei Ran, it¡¯s okay. Dad will find someone to cure you! I asked and they told me there¡¯s a chance of recovery in America! Don¡¯t worry¡­¡± No matter how he comforts him, Qu Wei Ran continues to shout in agony. His father turns around and glares at Yawang. ¡°You told him.¡± She laughs coldly back at him. He raises his arm up, ready to strike her. ¡°Go hit me. Don¡¯t blame me if that leads to a miscarriage.¡± He lowers his arm, the anger within him making his chest rise up and down violently. Qu Wei Ran calms down after awhile, and after he realizes how it all happened, he looks at Yawang. ¡°I couldn¡¯t believe you would do this for Xia Mu.¡± She sits on the couch and flashes a cold smile. ¡°It¡¯s not all for Xia Mu.¡± She lifts her gaze and looks at him with vengeance. ¡°You ruined me, so I¡¯m going to ruin you. I will be by your side to torture you and ruin you until I eliminate the hatred in my heart!¡± Qu Wei Ran stays silent for awhile, then gives Yawang a strange look. ¡°Yawang-ah, revenge don¡¯t suit you. I don¡¯t like this type of you.¡± ¡°I never wanted you to like me.¡± She replies coldly, her fists balled tightly. Qu Wei Ran continues to speak as if he didn¡¯t heard what she said. ¡°But I welcome you to torture me! Welcome!¡± She glares at him. ¡°You sick person!¡± He stays lying on the bed and tries to call her out with a coy voice. ¡°Yawang-ah, I want to drink some water.¡± She glances over and ignores him. Qu Wei Ran sees her reaction and starts to complain like a child. ¡°Ah, how can you be so cold? I¡¯m your husband.¡± Yawang throws down the book in her hands and stands up. ¡°You want to drink some water?¡± She walks by the bedside drawer and pours down hot boiling water in a glass cup, then pours it down his throat. Lu Peng Gang quickly runs to her and stops her, pulling her arm away. ¡°Stop, stop! My goodness.¡± As the two struggle, the water splashes out from the cup, burning Yawang¡¯s hand. She loosen her grip on the cup and it falls to the floor, shattering into pieces. Yawang inhales deeply to calm herself down, but a hand suddenly pulls onto her¡¯s. She looks up and see Qu Wei Ran with a worried look. ¡°Yawang-ah, your hand got burned. Does it hurt?¡± She quickly pulls her hand away from his grasp. ¡°You crazy person.¡± She turns her heels and walk back to her seat, rubbing her hand ferociously. Lu Peng Gang sighs and asks Qu Wei Ran as he changes the bedsheets, ¡°Why do you always have to agitate her?¡± Qu Wei Ran looks at Yawang and smiles. ¡°Don¡¯t you think she looks cute when she¡¯s mad?¡± He turns his head and looks at Yawang. Mad? I don¡¯t think mad is a suitable word for how she is feeling right now. ¡°Hey, don¡¯t look at my wife, I won¡¯t be happy.¡± Qu Wei Ran warns him with a glare. Didn¡¯t you tell me to look at her? This person is sick! Lu Peng Gang shakes his head and walks back to his seat after tucking Qu Wei Ran in with a blanket. He observes the two people in the room, one who is glaring at a book and turning the pages angrily, and the other who is looking at the reader with a smile. ¡°If you keep looking at me, I will claw your eyes out.¡± She throws the book towards Qu Wei Ran, but he swiftly moves his head to avoid being hit. ¡°You¡¯re my wife, I can look at you however I want.¡± ¡°Qu Wei Ran, you¡¯re going to drive me crazy.¡± ¡°It¡¯s alright, I can be crazy with you.¡± ¡°You are crazy to begin with.¡± ¡°That¡¯s because of you.¡± She shoots him a glare. ¡°Then why won¡¯t you die because of me?¡± He looks back at her with a crazy, twisted smile. ¡°That¡¯s because you didn¡¯t die. When you¡¯re alive, I want to have you. When you die, I¡¯ll die with you.¡± She glares at him without saying anything. He looks back at her with an innocent look on his face. ¡°Yawang-ah, can you not be so far away from me?¡± She stands up and sits by the window, her back facing him. She don¡¯t want to talk to him, she don¡¯t want to bother with him. She¡¯s scared that she won¡¯t be able to control herself and kill both of them! It¡¯s alright if she dies, but what about Xia Mu? Xia Mu, how are you now? Yawang lifts her head and gazes out the window¡­ Chapter 12: Rescue among the chaos (pt. 1) Chapter 12: Rescue among the chaos (pt. 1) He never would have thought that she would become someone else¡¯s wife. Inside the villa in the military compound, Xia Mu is locked inside his home. He sits on top of his bed with his head down, his fringe covering his eyes as his expression darkens. He never would have thought his grandfather would lock him inside the villa. _______________________________________________________________ In the morning, after Xia Mu hears about the news of Yawang from the maid auntie, he immediately turns his heels and walks straight to the door. As he hand reaches over the doorknob, an old, tired voice speaks up from behind. ¡°Where are you going?¡± ¡°Go find Yawang.¡± He answers back calmly without turning his head. ¡°You¡¯re not allowed to go.¡± The commander orders in a low voice. Xia Mu turns around with a shocked expression. ¡°Why can¡¯t I go?!¡± He doesn¡¯t understand what his grandfather is thinking. Why would he do that?!Commander Xia walks a few steps forward. ¡°That woman will ruin you!¡± He also doesn¡¯t understand what his grandson is thinking. Why can¡¯t he listen?! ¡°She will not ruin me,¡± Xia Mu looks at him coldly. ¡°If you don¡¯t let me go, the person who will ruin me is you, grandpa.¡± ¡°What are you talking about?!¡± Commander Xia yells out, his voice trembling from Xia Mu¡¯s tone. ¡°What kind of person do Grandpa hope I will become?¡± He asks with a slightly disappointed look. ¡°The person who commits a wrongdoing then blames it to the woman and hides behind his grandfather for help?¡± Commander Xia did not comment back. ¡°I don¡¯t want to! I rather go to jail than becoming that person!¡± ¡°Xia Mu!¡± Commander Xiao stomps his foot. ¡°Yawang did it voluntarily, no one forced her!¡± ¡°I also did it voluntarily, no one forced me.¡± He opens the door, with the sunlight shining onto him. He steps out and murmurs softly, ¡°I will take responsibility for my actions. Don¡¯t worry about me, Grandpa.¡± _______________________________________________________________ Commander Xia watches Xia Mu leave as he is stunned over his words. He suddenly thought of the conversation a long time ago between him and his son, Xia Mu¡¯s father. He also tried to leave the house once for a dangerous mission in Yunnan. He wouldn¡¯t let him go, telling him it¡¯s too dangerous. He hoped his son will protect his own region, but his son said the exact same thing and left! ¡°What kind of person do Dad hope I will become?¡± ¡°A person who can live in a comfortable life.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t want that. I just want to do the things I love. I will decide what to do, don¡¯t worry about me, Dad.¡± The sudden pain of losing a child hits him again. He clenches onto his chest and breathes deeply, but he feels like he can¡¯t breathe at all. Uncle Cheng hurriedly walks over to his side to support him. ¡°Commander¡­¡± ¡°Bring Xia Mu back!¡± He pants heavily as he points at Xia Mu¡¯s shadow. ¡°I cannot lose him, cannot!¡± Yes, it¡¯s true that he wants his son and grandson to become a righteous man, but now, he hope they can be safe by his side. Even if they don¡¯t want to, he will not give in to their objections. ¡°Yes!¡± After Uncle Cheng seats Commander Xia onto the couch, he and two security officers goes out to bring Xia Mu back. _______________________________________________________________ The night slowly starts to darken; as the room goes pitch black, Xia Mu slowly lifts his head, his eyes showing determination and an incisive expression. On one side, Xia Mu is locked inside his home. On the other side, Tang Xiao Tian completes his graduation rehearsal and gets in touch with Zhang Jing Yu. Zhang Jing Yu sounds like he¡¯s about to cry when he shouts at Xiao Tian over the phone. ¡°My god, you¡¯re finally coming back. Hurry!¡± Xiao Tian feels his heart sinking as his body turns cold. ¡°What happened? Tell me!¡± He shouts as he grips onto the phone. Zhang Jing Yu can¡¯t really explain what happened to Shu Yawang. He only knows about the widespread news of Xia Mu shooting Qu Wei Ran, but knowing Xia Mu¡¯s temperament, Jing Yu seems to guess what have happened, but didn¡¯t dare to tell Xiao Tian. He urges him to hurry back before it¡¯s too late. Tang Xiao Tian hangs up his phone and rushes home from his school. From the city of his school to his home in S City, it¡¯s about a fourteen hour train ride. He sits in the train cart as the train zooms by the dark night. He looks out of the window, the glass reflecting his silhouette. He narrows his eyebrows, looking like he is suppressing a never-ending amount of pain. He didn¡¯t realize that his whole body is trembling slightly, just thinking about what might possibly happen to Yawang leads to a suffocating pain to his heart. He forces himself to not think, forces himself to stay calm, but he can¡¯t do it. The premonition of losing something is driving him crazy! He needs to go back, go back to be by Yawang¡¯s side, never separating from her again. He can¡¯t have her encounter such dangerous events again, ever! When the early morning train stops at the S City train stop, Tang Xiao Tian pushes the passengers away to exit out of the train and calls for a taxi cab to go straight to the military compound. During that time, Commander Xia¡¯s voice can be heard from the three-story villa in the military compound, ordering Uncle Cheng to bring Xia Mu back. Uncle Cheng salutes as he receives the order, looking back at Xia Mu¡¯s bed before walking out of his room. At the end, he still ran off. This kid, whatever he wants to do, no one can stop him. _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang¡¯s mother carries her vegetable basket with an anxious expression. Her nose prickles as she thinks about her daughter. She walks up to the entrance of her home, climbing up four flights of stairs. She is about to retrieve her keys out from her purse when a shadow flashes by from upstairs. She drops her keys to the floor from the shock, the keys creating a clear sound. She slaps her hand onto her chest as she said, ¡°Aiyah, you scared me to death! What are you doing, my child?¡± ¡°Auntie, where¡¯s Yawang?¡± Tang Xiao Tian, who looks exhausted after not sleeping for one night, looks at her anxiously with his bloodshot eyes. Yawang¡¯s mother purses her lips and avoids his gaze. ¡°Xiao Tian, why did you come back? Aren¡¯t you busy preparing for graduation?¡± ¡°Where¡¯s Yawang?¡± He asks again. ¡°Yawang, Yawang¡­¡± She stops and looks at him in hesitation. ¡°Auntie, tell me, where is Yawang? Where is she?¡± He grips onto her arms, his bloodshot eyes watering. ¡°Auntie, please tell me. Yawang is my wife, what happened to her? I¡¯m begging you, please tell me.¡± ¡°She¡¯s¡­.she¡¯s no longer your fianc¨¦e, ¡± Her mother answers back, turning her head away because she can¡¯t bear to see his face. ¡°Yawang is married to someone else.¡± Tang Xiao Tian stands still, unable to regain the grasp of reality. It¡¯s like a clap of thunder striking in the clear sky, making him unable to react. He shakes his head as he steps back, looking at her in shock and disbelief as he clenches his jaw. ¡°Impossible! Impossible!¡± ¡°Yawang is mine, she¡¯s always been mine.¡± ¡°She won¡¯t marry someone else, never.¡± ¡°She loves me, I know she does.¡± He keeps muttering in a trembling voice, and as he meet eyes with Yawang¡¯s mother, the tears being withheld in his eye sockets fall down. He have thought of many possibilities in the train. He is mentally prepared with any possible unfortunate events that she have possibly encountered. No matter what happens, he still wants her. He will be by her side and love her, never leaving her. But he never thought of¡­thought of this happening. He never have thought that she will become someone else¡¯s wife. ¡°Auntie, she must be forced into it! Who forced her? Who?!¡± He suddenly yells out. Her mother raises her hand to wipe her tears away. She sighs out loud and answers in a sad tone, ¡°Whether if she¡¯s forced into it or did it voluntarily, she¡¯s already married. Xiao Tian, go back to school. I know my daughter, she¡¯s very stubborn, she will definitely think she won¡¯t be able to face you for the rest of her life. Don¡¯t go look for her, if you do, she might harm herself. You two, you two are over.¡± ¡°Over?¡± He repeats her word, then shakes his head. ¡°No, it can¡¯t be over. It will never be over.¡± He holds onto her hand and pleads to her. ¡°Auntie, tell me what happened to Yawang. Please tell me, I¡¯ll kneel down in front of you!¡± She hastily lifts up Xiao Tian, forbidding him to kneel down. She sighs and opens the door before turning her head to look at Xiao Tian. ¡°Come in, I¡¯ll tell you what happened.¡± At this time, the sun have reaches its peak, shining onto every person; the grief-looking Tang Xiao Tian who is sitting on the couch in the Shu family¡¯s living room, Xia Mu who is wandering the streets after escaping, and Shu Yawang who is looking at a distance from the hospital room¡¯s window. _______________________________________________________________ Qu Wei Ran looks at Shu Yawang in awe, he thinks that his Yawang is more beautiful now. It¡¯s like a type of quiet despair kind of beauty, so beautiful that he can¡¯t stray his eyes away from her. He have her, forcibly pulling her away from her happiness to be by his side, even he don¡¯t understand why he¡¯s so attached to her. Maybe it¡¯s because Tang Xiao Tian¡¯s love is too beautiful. He thinks that if he have Yawang, he will also have a beautiful love. ¡°Lu Pei Gang.¡± He calls out to his caretaker while gazing at Yawang. ¡°Yes, Mr. Qu?¡± He asks as he walks towards him, ¡°What do you need?¡± ¡°Pack up my belongings and help me with the discharge procedures.¡± Qu Wei Ran answers with a laugh. ¡°Mr. Qu, you can¡¯t. Your body still needs to undergo therapy treatment, you can¡¯t be discharged now.¡± ¡°No, I have to be discharged.¡± He argues stubbornly. ¡°Why?¡± Lu Pei asks in suspicion. Qu Wei Ran, whose gaze never strayed away from Yawang, smiles. ¡°Because¡­after stealing someone¡¯s treasure, we need to hurry up and hide it..¡± Yawang turns her body slowly and gives him a cold look. Qu Wei Ran squints his eyes and smiles back at her. _______________________________________________________________ The discharge procedures are done quickly and Lu Pei Gang reports back to the hospital room after he¡¯s finished. ¡°Mr. Qu, it¡¯s all done. Chief Qu wants you to wait for a moment, he will personally come over with someone to pick you up.¡± Qu Wei Ran who is lying on the hospital bed gives him a polite smile. ¡°I¡¯m sorry for troubling you.¡± ¡°You¡¯re too kind.¡± Lu Pei Gang replies back, dipping his head slightly before walking out of the room. Qu Wei Ran who is a good mood looks at Yawang who is staring out blankly at the window and sighs. ¡°Ah, I want to see Tang Xiao Tian.¡± Shu Yawang¡¯s eyes flash, ignoring him. He cocks his head to the side, his eyes showing a gloomy and evil expression. ¡°I really want to see him cry in agony.¡± Yawang turns her body around and gives him a cold stare. ¡°Like he will cry!¡± ¡°He won¡¯t? Hehe.¡± He looks at her in disbelief. ¡°Oh and that kid, what¡¯s his name? Xia Mu!¡± Qu Wei Ran¡¯s handsome face displays a strong resentment and scary expression. Shu Yawang quickly walks forward. ¡°You cannot touch him! We had an agreement.¡± ¡°Yawang-ah, you have to believe me. Even if I don¡¯t do anything, I can make his life into a living hell.¡± He chuckles back. Yawang gives a cold laugh in reply and turns her body away from him. ¡°Just you wait, I will also make your life a living hell.¡± Right now, Shu Yawang¡¯s eyes are filled with vengeance, she just wants to drag Qu Wei Ran to the most darkest and painful part of hell. But she seem to forgotten that this devil is already in the deepest parts of hell! _______________________________________________________________ Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father have quickly sent people to pick up his son, renting the hospital¡¯s ambulance to drive his son home. Qu Wei Ran is being put onto a wheelchair with Lu Pei Gang pushing him from the back. His father walks by his side and Shu Yawang follows from behind. The wheelchair enters the elevator and Yawang walks in right after. As the elevator door is preparing to close, Yawang¡¯s blank stare turns into shock when a familiar shadow appears. She didn¡¯t have enought time to confirm if it¡¯s him before the elevator doors close. The elevator slowly goes down as Yawang¡¯s heart beats fast. Is it him? How can it be? She grips onto her arms and bites her lips, shaking her head in denial. It can¡¯t be him. The elevator makes a ding sound and the doors open. Yawang steps out first and sees a hospital ambulance parked right in front of the entrance. The three men waiting by the ambulance rushes towards Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father and Lu Pei Gang to assist them in putting Qu Wei Ran into the ambulance. Lu Pei Gang straps the seatbelt onto Qu Wei Ran before setting up the IV drip and oxygen mask on him. He makes sure that everything is set up correctly before nodding his head to his father¡¯s direction. ¡°You can start the car.¡± Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father sits across from the wheelchair and Shu Yawang sits silently next to him. A man raise his arms to close the ambulance doors, and when Yawang looks up, everything happens in an instant flash, but in her eyes, it¡¯s in slow motion. That man grabs onto the ambulance door handle and locks it, making a ¡°pong¡± sound She turns her head and shuts her eyes, she have already made her decision, why does she still feel unwilling to do this? Yawang, whose eyes are shut, is not aware of Qu Wei Ran, whose gaze is firmly fixed on her. The man who closes the door goes to sit on the shotgun, opening and closing the door. Another man turns on the engine and Qu Wei Ran feel the corners of his lips lifted, revealing a victorious smile. _______________________________________________________________ At this time, someone opens the ambulance door! The sunlight shines inside the ambulance, causing Yawang to turn her head around. Under the bright sunlight, a shadow rushes in and grabs onto her right arm! ¡°Leave with me!¡± He yells, panting from the running. Shu Yawang can finally see his face clearly, he is still as handsome as ever, like a handsome teenager in a manga. ¡°Xia Mu?¡± She looks at him blankly. ¡°Let¡¯s go!¡± He tugs on her arm. ¡°No, I can¡¯t¡­¡± She shakes her head. ¡°Shut up! Just follow me!¡± He roars out this statement! She looks back at him in surprise, did he actually shouted at her? He tugs on her arm again, trying to pull her out. Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father stands up and holds onto Xia Mu¡¯s arm. ¡°You brat! How dare you appear in front of us again! Today, I will destroy you.¡± ¡°Go away!¡± He yells, throwing a piercing cold glare at him. Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father turns agitated and raises his arm to strike him, but Xia Mu is faster than him and retrieves a gun out with his left hand. He points the gun towards Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father¡¯s head. ¡°Go away!¡± He lets go of Xia Mu¡¯s arm in fear and walks two steps back. When being faced with a kid that has a criminal record, he didn¡¯t dare to anger him. Xia Mu still have his hand around Yawang¡¯s arm, and he pulls her as they two walk backwards facing them. Qu Wei Ran struggles to lifts his head from the stretcher and yells out, ¡°Xia Mu, if you dare to take her away, I will make you stay in prison for your whole life! Your whole life!¡± He stops and lets go of her arm, walking towards Qu Wei Ran and looking directly at him. ¡°I rather stay in my prison for my whole life than to let you touch even one strand of her hair! I hate that I didn¡¯t kill you that time, but it¡¯s not too late to act now since I¡¯ll be in prison for a lifetime anyway!¡± With Xia Mu¡¯s cold stare and voice full of hatred, no one will suspect his words as he places the gun near Qu Wei Ran¡¯s head. Qu Wei Ran¡¯s eyes show fear and his father shouts to stop him. ¡°No, you can¡¯t!¡± ¡°Xia Mu, stop.¡± Shu Yawang pleads, running to Xia Mu¡¯s side and pulling him away. ¡°Let¡¯s go, let¡¯s go.¡± Xia Mu snorts out a sound, raising a leg and kicking down the IV drip stand and respirator before pulling Yawang away. ¡°Xia Mu, just you wait! I will not let you go-hu, hu- will not let you go! Hu-hu-¡± ¡°Mr. Qu, calm down, take a deep breath. Inhale deeply!¡± Shu Yawang turns her head to look at the chaos in the ambulance. She sees his father¡¯s ashen face and Qu Wei Ran¡¯s embarrassed face, and she suddenly wants to laugh! At the end, she laughed. Chapter 12: Rescue among the chaos (pt. 2) Chapter 12: Rescue among the chaos (pt. 2) Xia Mu hails a taxi cab, stuffing Shu Yawang inside before sitting himself down and closing the door. After he reports their destination, he turns his head and gives a scornful look to the people inside the ambulance. During the ride, Yawang looks at the gun Xia Mu is holding onto and asks him worridely, ¡°Xia Mu, where did you get this gun from?¡± The gun before belongs to Xia Mu¡¯s father. After his mother committed suicide, the gun is in Xia Mu¡¯s possession. He didn¡¯t tell anyone, and hides the gun. Later, Yawang keeps on thinking about it. When Xia Mu was young, he often carried the gun with him, is it because the gun gave him a sense of security? ¡°Xia Mu, give me the gun, okay? I feel scared when I see you holding the gun.¡± She licks her lips nervously. Xia Mu turns his head and looks at her, shaking the gun in his hand. ¡°You¡¯re talking about this one?¡± She nods her head, holding both of her arms out. Xia Mu bites his lips, looking like he¡¯s trying to hold himself. After a while, he can¡¯t hold it anymore and flashes a proud smile. ¡°Huh?¡± She looks at him with widen eyes. He smiled? He really smiled? Even though it¡¯s short, Xia Mu smiled. So beautiful¡­The teenager¡¯s smile brings pride and assertiveness, not like before when it brings indifference. Xia Mu displays a mischievous smile like how a child smiles when he succeeds in his pranks. ¡°It¡¯s fake.¡± ¡°Huh!¡± ¡°If it was real, I would have been brought to the police already. I didn¡¯t steal either my grandpa¡¯s or Uncle Cheng¡¯s, so I took one of the toy model ones in the cabinet. I didn¡¯t think¡­¡± The corners of his lips lift up. ¡°They¡¯re so easy to fool!¡± ¡°Is it really fake?¡± She asks with doubt. When they were little, he told her the gun he was holding was fake, but it turned out to be real. ¡°Don¡¯t believe me?¡± He asks, frowning. Then, he points the gun to Yawang¡¯s head and shoots from it. Yawang shuts her eyes in fright, and feels a string of water hitting her hair. She opens her eyes and glares at him angrily. He turns his head away, biting his lips hard to hold himself back. ¡°Huh!¡± She angrily takes the water gun from him and shoots it back to Xia Mu. Xia Mu uses his hands to pull her arms down and looks at her with his beautiful eyes. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Yawang, let¡¯s go abort the baby.¡± He tells her in a serious tone. She is shocked from his words, looking at him like a fool. At this time, the taxi cab drives by a military jeep. For this, a chance to miss this opportunity, will it be for life? Or for a moment? ¡°Abort?¡± Her eyes shaking from fear. If I abort the baby, what will happen to Xia Mu? After the previous event, the Qu family will definitely hate Xia Mu so much that they want to kill him. If she tries to abort the baby again, there will be a possibility that Xia Mu will be imprisoned for life. She purses her lips and dips her head down, shaking her head lightly. ¡°I can¡¯t.¡± Xia Mu looks back at her. ¡°Is it because of me?¡± Yawang opens her mouth, trying to speak, but Xia Mu interjects. ¡°There¡¯s no need to.¡± ¡°Xia Mu?¡± She narrows her eyebrows. ¡°Maybe you guys think this is for my good, but it¡¯s not.¡± He glance down and continues to speak. ¡°If you really are going to give birth to this baby, then I¡¯m in prison for life.¡± He turns his head and looks at her. ¡°I will be the prisoner of my heart for the rest of my life, never be at ease.¡± Yawang feels her nose prickling and looks back at him. ¡°Xia Mu, I made this decision not because of you¡­¡± ¡°Don¡¯t say anymore.¡± He interrupts, grasping onto her hand tightly. ¡°Yawang, listen to me. I¡¯ve been listening to you this whole time, just this one time, listen to me.¡± _______________________________________________________________ The taxi cab slowly comes to a stop and Xia Mu pays the fare before opening the door and pulling Shu Yawang out. She lifts up her head and sees they¡¯re standing in front of S City¡¯s most well-known obstetrics and gynecology hospital. Yawang steps back in fear, but Xia Mu pulls her back. ¡°Xia Mu¡­¡± ¡°Let¡¯s go.¡± He grips onto her hand even tighter, keep on tugging onto her as she refuses to move forward. Shu Yawang walks hesitantly, she does not want to birth this child. The thought of the evidence to her humiliation calling her mother frightens her. She don¡¯t want to face this child, don¡¯t want to face Qu Wei Ran, she don¡¯t want to give birth¡­ Maybe it¡¯s because selfishness is human nature. When Yawang stayed in the hospital, even though it¡¯s hopeless, she still holds the belief that maybe she don¡¯t need to give birth. Maybe there will be a turn of events, maybe someone will save her. But, it¡¯s Xia Mu who arrive. He shows up and tells her to abort, he¡¯s the one who tells her to listen to him, so can she really not give birth? God, why is she so selfish? Shu Yawang bites onto her lips and stops walking, flinging Xia Mu¡¯s hand away from her. ¡°Enough!¡± She shouts, glaring at Xia Mu with reddened eyes. ¡°Xia Mu, it¡¯s enough. Don¡¯t be like this, I don¡¯t deserve you treating me so nice. In my mind, I have already hoped countless times to abort the dirty thing in my stomach. I have thought of leaving the hospital countless times, I even thought of not caring about you. I¡¯m not as great as you think, I¡¯m very bad, very selfish, and a coward. I hate myself, really hate this!¡± She tears up as she continues to speak, ¡°I feel very despicable, not only my body is dirty, but also my soul.¡± ¡°Despicable or selfish, isn¡¯t everyone like that?¡± Xia Mu asks. ¡°I¡¯m also like this, I don¡¯t want to see Yawang give birth to another man¡¯s child, whether it¡¯s Qu Wei Ran or Tang Xiao Tian, I don¡¯t want to see it happening.¡± Xia Mu walks forward and lays a hand on her shoulder, bending his waist slightly so he can meet her gaze. His gaze remains calm, not like how a seventeen year old normally looks. ¡°So now, let¡¯s abort the baby. This unwanted child don¡¯t need to be in this world.¡± Shu Yawang closes her eyes, then nods her head. _______________________________________________________________ In the hospital, there¡¯s a middle-aged woman who is seeing patients. She glances at the two in front of her. ¡°It¡¯s only been a month and a half, do you want to take the abortion pill or go through an in-clinic abortion?¡± Yawang lowers her head and licks her dry lips. ¡°Um¡­the pill.¡± The doctor glances at Yawang. ¡°In-clinic is more safe, and it¡¯s painless.¡± Of course Yawang knows the in-clinic procedure is better, but she can¡¯t bear to lie her body down on the operating table and have the cold machines¡­She bites her lips and grips onto Xia Mu¡¯s hand. Xia Mu returns the grip and Yawang lifts up her gaze. ¡°The pill.¡± She said with certainty. ¡°Okay, but I need to warn you. If the pill isn¡¯t done well, we might need to go through a surgical procedure to scrape the walls of your uterus to make sure everything is completely removed.¡± After she sees Yawang nodding her head, she writes down the prescription and hands it over to her. ¡°Go to the pharmacy to get the prescription.¡± Both Yawang and Xia Mu stands up, but Xia Mu is faster in grabbing the prescription, naturally pulling Yawang away. She glance back to the doctor and the doctor looks back at them lovingly. Yawang pulls her hand away in bewilderment and Xia Mu turns his head back to look at her, she lowers her head to avoid his gaze. He purses his lips and remain silent, reaching out for her hand again and continues to walk forward. After the two obtain the prescription, the doctor instructs Yawang to take the pills for three days. On the third day, she must go to the hospital to take it. After she¡¯s done explaining, she turns her head to face Xia Mu and tells him to take good care of her, have her rest more, and buy some tonics for her. Yawang opens her mouth awkwardly to explain their relationship, but Xia Mu interrupts her by nodding his head and said, ¡°I understand.¡± Shu Yawang raises her hand and scratches her face awkwardly. After the two leave the hospital, they didn¡¯t go home, they go to a motel under Xia Mu¡¯s suggestion. _______________________________________________________________ That night, Yawang takes the first pill in front of Xia Mu. As she swallows the pill, she don¡¯t know how she feels, it¡¯s complicated. Around dawn, the pill starts to take its effects. She feels a faint abdominal pain, it feels like a pair of hands pinching onto her uterus. Then she starts to bleed, curling herself on the bed in agony as cold sweat starts to form on her forehead. She wraps herself with her arms and turns her body left and right, unable to sleep. ¡°Is it really painful?¡± Xia Mu asks, getting off from his bed and climbing on top of hers. Yawang turns her head to look at him and shakes her head, giving him a faint smile. ¡°It¡¯s not painful, it¡¯s just like having diarrhea.¡± Of course, the first two days aren¡¯t as painful. As Shu Yawang takes the pill on the third day, she experiences the very definition of pain! It¡¯s so painful that Yawang nearly faints, the hand that¡¯s been holding onto Xia Mu¡¯s tightly cramps up. As a large amount of blood is being removed from her body, she feels like she¡¯s about to collapse. When the doctor examines the blood that is collected into the spittoon and tells them that Yawang don¡¯t need to go through the surgical procedure, Yawang exhales out a sigh of relief. She looks at Xia Mu with an exhausted expression and he walks forward to help her walk a few steps before having her sit onto a chair. He crouches down and turns his back to her, lifting her up and carrying her on his back. Yawang leans onto his body and closes her eyes, her hands wrapped tightly against him. Then, she suddenly lowers her head and buries her face on his shoulders. ¡°Xia Mu¡­¡± ¡°Huh?¡± He replies back softly. ¡°What¡¯s going to happen to you? Xia Mu, what¡¯s going to happen to you?¡± She cries, her voice carrying guilt and sadness. He didn¡¯t answer her and keeps walking. After awhile, he speaks up and said, ¡°It¡¯ll be alright, it¡¯ll be alright.¡± But when Xia Mu said it¡¯ll be alright, will it really be alright? _______________________________________________________________ The Qu family explodes when Xia Mu takes Shu Yawang away from them. Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father announce that even if he needs to use up his entire fortune, he will get his revenge! The Qu family once again brings their lawsuit against Xia Mu to court and adds in an attempted murder charge, asking the court to sentence Xia Mu, a violent juvenile, to life sentence! They also go and get the media¡¯s attention by adding spice to the news reports. The netizens once again are in an outrage, posting many comments that criticizes the children of officials. Among the group of netizens, a large portion of them are being paid by the Qu family. Within an hour, the Xia family makes a counterattack, deleting all the posts online. Now, all the IP addresses in the province will not be able to search up anything under the keywords, ¡°military official¡±, ¡°homicide¡±, ¡°Xia Mu¡±, and ¡°officials¡¯ children¡±. The Qu family is silent for a day, but then strikes back as a group of university students who they paid for, marches in protest out in the streets at eight in the morning! The ministry of public security quickly asks for police enforcement to disperse the crowd, however, someone initiates violence and both sides are in physical conflict, nearing causing a casualty! This matter surprises the higher officials in the central government, and they order the S Municipal Court to start the trial immediately, and to handle the case with fairness, justice, and principles of justice. The court denies Xia Mu¡¯s bail and immediately goes to have an arrest warrant to arrest him. If the Xia family doesn¡¯t hand Xia Mu over to the officials, the Qu family will provoke them, saying that they are intentionally holding onto Xia Mu and that they are defying China¡¯s laws. After the mast pressure the ministry of public security have from the group of university students, they develop a resentment towards the Xia family. They report this matter to the central military commission and request for assistance to investigate this case. Originally this situation is not in calm waters, and now it turns into a stormy sea once again! _______________________________________________________________ Qu Wei Ran, who is lying on the bed, smiles as he hear about the development of the case. ¡°Well done, even if the Xia family has a lot of power, in this day and age, once we have the public¡¯s opinion, it¡¯s useless. Because since the ancient times, the Chinese people value one thing, reputation.¡± ¡°Young master is right.¡± The assistant who reports the current situation to him, reply back. ¡°What happened to the group of students that got arrested from the protest?¡± Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father, who is sitting at the side, asks. ¡°Don¡¯t worry, Chief Qu.¡± The assistant answers back, nodding his head. ¡°I already paid them off, they wouldn¡¯t report us.¡± ¡°They were only arrested for fifteen days, it¡¯s a thousand dollars a day, such a bargain. I think they wouldn¡¯t mind staying for a few more days.¡± Qu Wei Ran laughs. ¡°Now, once Xia Mu shows up, it¡¯s game over. He¡¯ll be serving for at least ten years!¡± His father said with an evil grin. ¡°Only ten years?¡± Qu Wei Ran asks with a frown, then he turns his head to face Lawyer Cheng. ¡°Can¡¯t we ask for more?¡± The lawyer nods his head. ¡°Ten years is the minimum, maximum is life sentence. Since he¡¯s not an adult yet, we can¡¯t ask for death penalty.¡± ¡°But, since¡­uh, what if the Xia family said that it¡¯s because Wei Ran raped Yawang so that¡¯s why Xia Mu uses a gun for murder, will that lessen his sentence?¡± The lawyer shakes his head. ¡°No, that¡¯s two different cases. If Mr. Qu raped Miss Shu, she can file a civil lawsuit. If there¡¯s concrete evidence, the court may take action to Mr. Qu. However, since Mr. Qu is paralyzed, you may apply for remission of sentence, pardon, or removal of criminal penalties for medical treatment. In most cases, you just need to pay the penalty fee.¡± ¡°So in this case, even if Shu Yawang wins the lawsuit, I don¡¯t need to go to jail. She basically just told the whole world that she¡¯s one of the woman I toyed with.¡± The lawyer nods his head. ¡°You can say it like that, and since it¡¯s Xia Mu who attempts to murder you with a gun, it¡¯s a problem between you and him, it have nothing to do with Shu Yawang. Even if it does, that¡¯s just the cause of it. Most homicide cases don¡¯t ask for the cause, they only ask about the aftermath. No matter what, murder is murder, the law will not take it lightly. The only reason he can lessen his sentence is because he¡¯s still a minor.¡± Qu Wei Ran¡¯s father sighs in relief. ¡°After hearing what Lawyer Cheng have mentioned, I feel at ease.¡± ¡°The Shu family must have know about this too, that¡¯s why Shu Yawang didn¡¯t sue me. If that¡¯s the case, then I will want her to sue me. Then, I can tell the whole world that I toyed with a virgin! A lot of men must be jealous of me.¡± Qu Wei Ran tells his father. ¡°Jealous my ass!¡± His father shouts, banging his fist onto the table. ¡°You could have touched anyone, but you touched the one that has a wild dog by her side! Look at how he bitten you! Now, now you¡¯re in this state, don¡¯t you know how hurt I am?¡± ¡°I know my own body, it will get better.¡± Qu Wei Ran replies back nonchalantly. His father sighs. ¡°After this, I¡¯m sending you to America. I hear that they have treatments that can cure you.¡± Qu Wei Ran understands what his father means of curing him. Honestly, after what happened to him, he regretted raping Shu Yawang. But when he thought of that night, her smooth skin, her suppressed whimpers, her teary eyes, his thrusting pelvis against her, all of that got him excited. Even if time goes back, he will still do it, but he will be smarter. After doing it, he will hide her away, not letting the wild dog be able to find her. Even as he thinks about this disgusting thing, Qu Wei Ran still have a gentle smile plastered onto his face. _______________________________________________________________ At this time, the door suddenly opens and Lu Pei Gang walk towards Qu Wei Ran. ¡°Mr. Qu, there¡¯s a Mr. Tang who likes to see you.¡± Qu Wei Ran squints his eyes gleefully and lifts the corners of his lips to a playful smile. ¡°He finally came back.¡± He gives in some thought before answering him back. ¡°Have him come in.¡± ¡°Wei Ran?¡± His father looks at him worriedly, he knows about this Tang Xiao Tian. He went military training with his son and is also Yawang¡¯s boyfriend. If he sees his son and gets angry¡­ Tang Xiao Tian enters the room with an exhausted face, but his gaze remains strong as he looks at Qu Wei Ran in the eye. Qu Wei Ran turns his head to look at his father and Lawyer Cheng. ¡°You guys leave the room, I want to have a nice talk with my old comrade.¡± ¡°No.¡± His father replies back with a worried expression. ¡°Dad, don¡¯t worry. I know him too well, he wouldn¡¯t dare to hit a person who can¡¯t even lift their arms. Am I right, Xiao Tian?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not so sure about that.¡± He answers back, each of his word striking them like a coin hitting the floor. Qu Wei Ran laughs and then gives a cold face. ¡°You guys leave.¡± His father can¡¯t win over him, so he brings the lawyer out to the door. He orders Lu Pei Gang to eavesdrop on them, and if anything happens, rush inside. Lu Pei Gang stands outside of the door, sticking his ear against the door, eavesdropping the conversation happening inside. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Still haven¡¯t seen Yawang yet?¡± Qu Wei Ran talks in a friendly tone. ¡°Judging from how you look, you definitely haven¡¯t seen her yet.¡± ¡°I forbid you to say her name!¡± He yells, exploding with anger. ¡°Forbid me?¡± He asks with a provocative tone. ¡°Why are you forbidding me, I was the man she was closest with.¡± After a series of clashing noise, Qu Wei Ran displays a pleased smile. ¡°What did I say, you, are the not the type of person who will hit a person who can¡¯t even lift their arms.¡± ¡°Why did you do this? Why?!¡± Tang Xiao Tian sounds like he¡¯s going to break down. ¡°You promised me you wouldn¡¯t touch her, why did you do this?!¡± ¡°Because of you! It¡¯s all your fault!¡± Qu Wei Ran shouts back. ¡°That¡¯s right, it¡¯s because of you. Xiao Tian, you have this person by your side. It¡¯s like eating melon seeds, some people like to take out the ¡®meaty part¡¯ and gather them up before eating. At this time, don¡¯t you have the urge to eat all of the ¡®meat¡¯ that they have collected? Or like the ones who, when they eat strawberry cakes, eats the cake first before touching the strawberry. Don¡¯t you have the urge to steal the strawberry and have it for yourself?¡± Qu Wei Ran gives a cruel smile. ¡°In my eyes, Shu Yawang is the ¡®meat¡¯ of the melon seeds, the strawberry of the strawberry cake, the one who I¡¯ve been spying on for a long time, and now I finally eaten her!¡± ¡°Qu Wei Ran, you bastard!¡± ¡°That¡¯s right, I¡¯m a bastard, but you¡¯re the one who invited me to this! All of the misfortunes that happened to Yawang was because of you. You¡¯re the one who invited the wolf in, how can you blame the wolf from eating Little Red Riding Hood?¡± ¡°I¡¯m going to kill you!¡± Xiao Tian shouts. Lu Pei Gang hears him and quickly calls for people to burst open the door. In the room, Tang Xiao Tian is choking Qu Wei Ran with his hands around his neck. Lu Pei Gang rushes forward to pull Xiao Tian¡¯s arm away. Xiao Tian looks at Qu Wei Ran with an explosive gaze, ready to kill him. His grip is too strong, Lu Pei Gang is unable to pull his arms away. Two more bodyguards rush into the room and tries to pull Xiao Tian¡¯s arms away. One of the bodyguards see Qu Wei Ran¡¯s face turning purple, so he takes out his taser and tased Xiao Tian¡¯s waist. Tang Xiao Tian¡¯s body turns limp from the shock and Lu Pei Gang quickly pushes him away from Qu Wei Ran, making sure the electricity didn¡¯t hit him. The two bodyguards hold him down and Xiao Tian can¡¯t fight back after his body turns numb from the electrocution. ¡°I¡¯m going to kill you.¡± Tang Xiao Tian repeats out loud. Qu Wei Ran rubs his neck and coughs out loud before looking back at Xiao Tian. ¡°I don¡¯t care if it¡¯s you or Xia Mu, I wouldn¡¯t let anyone have the chance!¡± As the two bodyguards drag Tang Xiao Tian out of the door, he glares at Qu Wei Ran. ¡°I can¡¯t believe I treated a person like you as a brother! I must have been blind!¡± Qu Wei Ran rubs his neck and stays silent. When he don¡¯t hear Tang Xiao Tian¡¯s voice, he suddenly lowers his head and whispers to himself. ¡°From the day I met her, I don¡¯t think of you as my brother.¡± Chapter 13: What can i do to compensate you? Chapter 13: What can i do to compensate you? But, he¡¯s now a wanted murderer! What¡¯s waiting for him in the future, maybe it¡¯s only prison¡­ _______________________________________________________________ After Tang Xiao Tian left, Qu Wei Ran lies down on his bed peacefully, making the whole room silent. Lu Pei Gang strides towards him and said, ¡°Mr. Qu, it¡¯s time for your massage.¡± Qu Wei Ran opens one of his eyes and responds back to him lazily. Lu Pei Gang bends his waist and starts to massage his right arm; this type of massage therapy is pinpointing acupuncture points. When he barely uses his strength, it gives Qu Wei Ran a sore and tingling feeling, but if he don¡¯t use his strength, the massage therapy wouldn¡¯t be effective. As Lu Pei Gang massages, he subtly glances over to Qu Wei Ran and sees his face turning white and his eyebrows narrowing, as if he¡¯s trying to suppress the pain from the massaging. He don¡¯t understand this man sometimes, getting himself into this situation just to have a moment¡¯s fun, is it worth it? Forcing his old comrade to the depths of hell, doesn¡¯t he have a trace of sadness or guilt in him? ¡°Mr. Qu, does it feel better today?¡± He asks, continuing to massage him like a robot. Qu Wei Ran slowly opens his eyes and give him a gentle smile. ¡°It¡¯s very sore.¡± ¡°Sore?¡± He asks suspiciously. ¡°All of my joints feel sore.¡± He turns his head towards the window and looks out to the sky. ¡°It¡¯s going to rain.¡± Lu Pei Gang follows his gaze and looks out to the sky, the sky is clear and the sun is shining at the highest point, where did he get the premonition of rain? He turns his head back and looks at Qu Wei Ran, whose eyes are still gazing at the window, as if he¡¯s waiting for his premonition to happen. That evening, as Qu Wei Ran falls into a deep sleep, it starts to drizzle. Lu Pei Gang opens the windows and looks down to the pedestrians who are frantically trying to find shelter. ¡°It¡¯s really raining?¡± The rain is pouring harder, and on the driveway near the Qu¡¯s family villa, parked a jeep. There¡¯s no one inside the jeep, but if you look closely, you will see a man sitting on the right side of the jeep. He is sitting on the cold and dirty ground with his head down, the rain wetting his jacket. The raindrops fall down from his short hair to the corner of his eye, then down to the bridge of his nose. There are bruises on his face, his lips are trembling slightly, his camouflage jacket is disheveled from the struggle before, but he remains sitting. He is sitting still, like he¡¯s been sitting there for a thousand years, ten thousand years, not being able to move an inch. _______________________________________________________________ June tends to rain heavily; a light drizzle turning into heavy rain, the raindrops knocking against the window glass. The woman standing behind the window looks out at the distance, extending her arm out of the window, feeling the falling raindrops. The video store across the street is playing an unknown English song, lightly dispersed in the rain, giving it a sorrowful feeling. Suddenly, the woman is pulled backwards. She stumbles two steps back and turns her head, looking at a young teenager who is frowning at her. ¡°You can¡¯t touch cold water.¡± The woman gently lowers her head and the young man uses a towel to wipe off the raindrops on her hand. The young man¡¯s hand is really beautiful, his white skin covering his long and lean fingers, his clean palm carrying warmth. She blinks her eyes and turns his hand over, holding onto his hand. The young man stops what he¡¯s doing and looks at her with his head down. The two stand still in silence, his exhaled breath gently blowing onto the hair on her head. The woman didn¡¯t say anything and just holds onto his hand. The rain¡¯s still falling down, the cloudy sky turning dark. A strip of wind blows into the narrow opening of the window and blows onto both of their hair. The woman shivers slightly, so the young man extends his arm out and turns his body to close the window, closing off the sounds of the wind, the rain, and all the other sounds outside. After he closes the window, he turns his body around. ¡°Yawang, go to bed.¡± He tells her sternly. Shu Yawang blushes as she shoots him a glare. She climbs onto the bed and drapes the blanket over her, looking back at him. He just came back from outside, not bothering to remove his jacket. He unties the plastic bag and takes out a thermal food container that he bought in a supermarket. He turns open the cover and the smell of chicken broth is dispersed into the room. He hands over the container to her and she receives it with both hands. The young man takes out a spoon from the bag and hands it over to her. ¡°Drink.¡± Yawang looks down at the large container of chicken broth and narrows her eyebrows. Ever since the day she needs to take the abortion pills, she¡¯s been drinking chicken broth for four days straight, it¡¯s to the point where she wants to puke. She dips the spoon into the broth and stirs it, not being able to feel the bottom of the container with the spoon. ¡°It¡¯s too much.¡± Xia Mu stares at her silently with a sullen face. ¡°You have to finish it.¡± She pouts and lifts her spoon, drinking it one spoonful at a time with Xia Mu watching her. Yawang sees him constantly watching her and feels bad, so she extends the spoon over to his lips. ¡°Want some?¡± He hesitates for awhile, then leans over to have a sip. She gets another spoonful and extends it to his lips. ¡°Another sip.¡± He glares at her, unwilling to have another sip, but seeing her smile, he¡¯s unable to reject her, so he have another sip. Shu Yawang is about to give him another spoonful when Xia Mu presses his hand over hers. ¡°Finish it yourself!¡± She purses her lips, feeding herself spoonfuls of soup dejectedly while Xia Mu looks at her with a faint smile. _______________________________________________________________ The TV is playing in the room, playing the local news from S City News. The female anchor is listing out all of the local news headlines. ¡°Today is the day before the first day of our annual gaokao (National Higher Education Entrance Examinations). Let¡¯s see how our students are preparing for the examinations, here¡¯s our students from S City High.¡± The TV shows the students burying their heads in books; the familiar school, the familiar classrooms, the familiar school uniforms. Shu Yawang stops drinking the soup and stares at the screen, her heart clenching as her nose prickles. ¡°It¡¯s almost the day of the examinations¡­¡± Xia Mu turns his head around to look at the screen, his eyes showing a gloomy expression. He nods his head lightly and murmurs back a ¡°yes.¡± She bites her lips, the feeling of self-blame and guilt pressing against her chest, making it hard for her to breathe. She feels she¡¯s going to go crazy whenever she thinks of Xia Mu¡¯s future. Yes, Xia Mu is a high school senior. Xia Mu should be taking the entrance examinations. But now, he¡¯s hiding in a motel! If it¡¯s not because of me, Xia Mu will definitely be in the classroom studying, taking the examination, receiving acceptance letters from brand name universities, his future looking bright and beautiful. But, he¡¯s now a wanted murderer! What¡¯s waiting for him in the future, maybe it¡¯s only prison¡­Yawang shuts her eyes, not daring to ask, not daring to ask Xia Mu what¡¯s going to become of them, will he regret this, will he hate her. She does not dare to ask, even if he don¡¯t hate her now, don¡¯t regret this now, what about in the future? How is she going to compensate him, compensate his future, his life, his youth? ¡°Yawang?¡± Xia Mu asks softly from near the bed. ¡°Why are you crying again?¡± She lowers her head and shakes it violently. ¡°No, I¡¯m not crying.¡± He extends his hand and wipes away the tears on her face gently, watching her in silence. Yawang wants to lift her head up and smile at him, but she can¡¯t do it. ¡°Yawang, don¡¯t cry. I can¡¯t stand it when you cry. When you cry, I want to kill.¡± She quickly raises her head and looks at him with widen eyes. He looks back at her, his clear eyes showing sincerity and, and the feelings for Yawang, very pure, very deep, carrying the passion of youth. Yawang is silent for awhile, then suddenly speaks up to ask him, ¡°Do you really like me that much?¡± ¡°Yes, really like you.¡± ¡°Even if I¡­even if I got married, you still like me?¡± ¡°Yes, still like.¡± She holds onto her hands together tightly and turns silent. Suddenly, it looks like she have made a decision when she said, ¡°Alright.¡± ¡°Alright what?¡± Xia Mu asks, looking at her suspiciously. She shakes her head, not answering back. She takes out the kissing fishes necklace around her neck and removes one of the fishes, using a red string lying on top of the bed to make a necklace for it and tying it around Xia Mu¡¯s neck. ¡°It¡¯s for you.¡± Xia Mu touches the silver kissing fish and looks at her in confusion. ¡°For me? Why?¡± Didn¡¯t he give this to her? That time, he told her to keep wearing it, to never remove it. Now, why is she giving it to him? She wears the necklace back around her neck and lifts up her head. ¡°Birthday present.¡± ¡°Birthday present?¡± ¡°It¡¯s for your eighteenth birthday, I¡¯m giving it to you six days in advance, you like it?¡± Xia Mu gives a small pout. ¡°You¡¯s so stingy.¡± How can she gives me half of what I had given to her? ¡°I¡¯m stingy? Then give it back to me!¡± She acts like she¡¯s trying to grab the fish back. Xia Mu twists his body to avoid her, and continues to pout. Yawang withdraws her hand and hugs the thermal food container. Her heart is like a clear lake, it¡¯s not having raging waves or struggling. A flash of lightning can be seen from the window, followed by a loud clap of thunder. Shu Yawang looks at the chicken broth inside the container, Xia Mu, I finally found something I can do to compensate you. If¡­if you go to prison, no matter how long, I will wait for you. If at that time, you still like me, I will compensate myself to you. _______________________________________________________________ The June showers don¡¯t seem like they will ever stop, they keep on falling and falling. From afar, below the dim streetlights, the man sitting beside the military jeep finally stands up. He opens the car door and sits inside, his face drenched with rain water, his reddened eyes showing clear persistence. But, he¡¯s not the only one who¡¯s being persistent. The second he stands up, the second he makes his decision, another person from afar also makes her decision. The two who loved each other, have made two different decisions, one remains persistent, one decides to give up. The next morning, the rain finally stops. After the rain shower, the ground exhibits a fresh and earthy smell, the quiet city slowly bustled about. Shu Yawang open her eyes slowly as she hears the car beeping sounds from outside the window, her vision fuzzy from sleepiness. She turns her head to the other side of the bed out of habit, but sees the cover being draped over with no one there. She turns suspicious and sits up on the bed, facing towards the bathroom. ¡°Xia Mu?¡± The bathroom is quiet, with no replies to be heard. She leans against the bedside and thinks where can he possibly be. Did he went out to buy chicken broth again? She pulls the covers away and is about to step down from the bed when a letter lying diagonally from the pillow catches her attention. She narrows her eyebrows and picks up the letter, lowering her gaze to read the content. Her suspicious expression quickly turns into shock, the letter slipping off from her hands. She quickly pulls the covers away and jumps off the bed, running out of the room with her slippers, pajamas, bed hair, and reddened eyes. _______________________________________________________________ Yawang, I have a lot of things to tell you, but I¡¯m afraid I won¡¯t be able to leave if I see you cry, so I wrote this letter. Yawang, I know there are some things you don¡¯t want to hear¡­but, I¡¯m still going to say it. Listen to me for one last time, okay? This is the last, afterwards, I don¡¯t think I will have the opportunity to. Yawang, I like you. I don¡¯t know when it started since I¡¯ve been noticing you. Maybe it¡¯s from the time you hit me, or maybe it¡¯s from the time you teach me how to draw. Actually, if I think about it seriously, you¡¯re not pretty enough, not caring enough, not smart enough, and you don¡¯t like me enough. But, Yawang, I like you. I liked you for a really, really long time. Yawang, I know you like Tang Xiao Tian. Even though I never liked him, you¡¯ve been liking him this whole time, more than me, you liked him much more. So¡­if you keep on liking him, then, at least, I can not hate him. Yawang, Tang Xiao Tian came back, you should go look for him. Yawang, we have heard before of how Tang Xiao Tian¡¯s father wanted him to become a real man and to become his pride. I remembered when you heard that, your eyes were sparkling, they were so beautiful. That time, you also said this, you said you want me to become your pride, I¡¯ve always remembered that. Then, Yawang, the me now, did I became your pride? Yawang, these past few days, even though you are hiding this from me, how can I possibly not know this case is being disadvantageous to us? I must go and turn myself in, there is no coward in the Xia family. There was never one before, and there won¡¯t be one ever. Yawang, I know you think you ruined me, but I really don¡¯t regret this. Even if it¡¯s a life sentence or a death penalty, I won¡¯t regret it, I only regret that I¡¯m not able to kill that bastard for you! Yawang, you must be crying now, don¡¯t cry, okay? I¡¯m leaving with no regrets, so don¡¯t feel sad, okay? Yawang, I heard of this saying before: the biggest happiness in this world is two people loving each other and the second biggest happiness is seeing the person you love happy. I¡¯m not able to have the first biggest happiness, but Yawang, can you help me with the second biggest? Yawang, I like you. So Yawang, you have to be happy. ¨CXia Mu _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang runs around the streets aimlessly, not knowing where to go, not knowing where to find him, not knowing how to stop him! ¡°Xia Mu, Xia Mu!¡± Shu Yawang cries as she runs around aimlessly, her voice choking from the tears. Her whole body is shaking in fear, she¡¯s useless, she can¡¯t find him! When she stops by a telephone booth, her blank gaze is suddenly captivated by the red telephone. She stumbles inside and quickly dials a familiar number. The phone rings two times before someone picks up. ¡°Hello?¡± ¡°Dad.¡± She cries. ¡°Yawang?¡± Her dad¡¯s voice suddenly turns anxious. ¡°Where are you?! Is Xia Mu with you?¡± ¡°Dad¡­¡± Yawang bites onto her lips hard. ¡°Xia Mu turned himself in.¡± The person on the receiving end is shocked, then suddenly yells into the phone. ¡°How can you let him turn himself in?! If he turns himself in now, his life is over! Commander Xia won¡¯t be able to save him! How can you let Xia Mu turn himself in?!¡± ¡°Dad¡­¡± A tear falls down to her face. ¡°Dad, I¡¯m going to sue Qu Wei Ran for rape.¡± Her father turns silent for awhile, then asks her seriously, ¡°You¡¯re sure about this?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± Actually, on the day after Xia Mu shot Qu Wei Ran, Yawang went to the hospital for a check-up for evidence. It¡¯s just that after a series of events that happened that makes her not wanting to press charges. But now, she¡¯s sure about this, she wants everyone to know what kind of person he is! She wants everyone to know that Xia Mu is not those reckless children that don¡¯t care about consequences! It¡¯s her fault, everything is her fault. She should not have been so weak, should not back away. It doesn¡¯t matter what happens after she sues him, she¡¯s not afraid, she¡¯s not going to regret it! ¡°Yawang, come home first, Dad will help you.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± She hangs up the phone, standing in the telephone booth for awhile before turning her body to leave. The news of Xia Mu turning himself in and Yawang suing Qu Wei Ran for rape have quickly passed to the Qu family. At first when Qu Wei Ran hears about this news, he is shocked, but then he starts to laugh, anticipating for what to happen. After he laughs, he suddenly looks lost, no one is able to understand what¡¯s he thinking of. _______________________________________________________________ Three days before the trial, Shu Yawang sits on her bed as the windows are shut closed in her room. Her mom heaves a sigh outside of her room as her dad exhales out a puff of smoke. When Yawang¡¯s mom opens the door, Tang Xiao Tian walks straight into their home. Her nose prickles and she shakes her head at him. ¡°Xiao Tian, go back. Go back, child.¡± Tang Xiao Tian glances over Yawang¡¯s room. ¡°Auntie, I¡¯ll wait for her here. She don¡¯t come out for a day, I¡¯ll wait for a day. If she don¡¯t come out for a year, I¡¯ll wait for a year.¡± ¡°Why bother?¡± She asks as she shakes her head sadly. He remains silent and stands idly, waiting in silence. How can he leave when his Yawang is here, in her room. He¡¯s so close to her¡­.but, why does he feel like he won¡¯t be able to find her again? Why does he feel like Yawang is gone, his Yawang is gone. _______________________________________________________________ Two days before the trial, Commander Xia personally visits the prison center to see Xia Mu. Xia Mu is still like his quiet self, but as he sees his grandfather¡¯s haggard face, he gives him a comforting smile. Commander Xia is stunned to see his smile, and his eyes turn moist as he nods his head. ¡°You and your father are so alike, especially when you two smile.¡± One day before the trial, Lu Pei Gang is cleaning Qu Wei Ran¡¯s room when he finds a photo of a girl. The girl is about eighteen to nineteen years old. She¡¯s wearing an orange jacket and standing on the border of Lijiang, one of her hand holding onto her hair that keeps on blowing from the wind, and smiling sweetly towards the camera. _______________________________________________________________ 2004, June 23rd. Xia Mu¡¯s 18th birthday. The murder case that have been pushed back for three months have finally start its trial! In the S City Supreme Court, the gallery filled with curious spectators. The Qu family¡¯s lawyer standing in the middle of the courtroom, presenting all the evidence against Xia Mu. Shu Yawang looks at Xia Mu who is standing by the defendant¡¯s stand. He looks exhausted, his handsome face showing no expression, listening to the lawyer listing his crimes like the person the lawyer is talking about is not him. Qu Wei Ran, who is wearing a suit and sitting by the plantiff¡¯s stand, have a cheerful expression. The Qu family¡¯s lawyer turns his body around to face the witness stand. ¡°Miss Shu Yawang, you said it¡¯s because my client raped you that the defendant uses a gun to hurt him, correct?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Based on your statements and the results from the blood test, you were drinking that day?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°How much did you drank?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t remember.¡± ¡°Miss Shu, did you engage in a sexual act with my client willingly because of your drunken state? You want to help the defendant to excuse his crimes so you deliberately accuse my client?¡± The lawyer asks aggressively. Shu Yawang raises her head and gives a glare to the lawyer, nearly spilling out an outburst of profanity. At the end, she endures and clenches her jaw. ¡°No! I remembered very clearly!¡± She whips her head to Qu Wei Ran who is sitting on a wheelchair. ¡°If you don¡¯t believe me, go ask your client, I¡¯m sure he will be willing to confess about it!¡± Qu Wei Ran tilts his head to the side and smiles. ¡°Yes, I forced her, I remembered the smell of virginity on her, remembered her cries of pain.¡± Yawang¡¯s face turns white, her lips bleeding from her biting. The gallery is filled with gasps, and Tang Xiao Tian who is sitting in the gallery stands up angrily and shouts, ¡°I¡¯m going to kill you!¡± His handsome face is being twisted from anger and vengeance. Tang Xiao Tian¡¯s father and Zhang Jing Yu pulls him down and he seems like he lost his sense when he struggles to escape. ¡°Order! Order!¡± The judge shouts as he pounds the little hammer onto his stand. However, Xiao Tian can¡¯t keep in order, he¡¯s going crazy! In his eyes, he only sees Qu Wei Ran¡¯s disgusting smile, he wants to go up and tear him apart! It¡¯s him, that devil! He ruined Yawang, ruined Xia Mu, ruined him! Qu Wei Ran, you devil! _______________________________________________________________ In order to have the trial run smoothly, the judge order the security guards to take Tang Xiao Tian out of the courtroom, forbidding him to enter. As he is being dragged out of the courtroom, Shu Yawang didn¡¯t dare to turn her head around to look at him. She don¡¯t dare to look at him, scared to see his devastated face. She lowers her head and swallow back her tears, biting her lips, persisting to the end. She cannot cry, cannot leave, cannot be ashamed, this is the only hope for Xia Mu to lessen his sentence! She inhales deeply and lifts up her head. When Tang Xiao Tian is out of the courtroom, he wants to rush back in, wants to kill that devil that destroyed everything! But then, a punch strikes his face and causes him to fall down to the ground. He looks shocked, his lips bleeding. Uncle Tang stands in front of him and yells out, ¡°Calm down! You¡¯re not Xia Mu, if you kill someone, you¡¯ll definitely receive the death penalty. How much pain do you want to give to the Shu family¡¯s daughter?¡± Tang Xiao Tian slowly stands up and lowers his head, not saying a word. Uncle Tang exhales out a sigh. ¡°Think about what you should do now.¡± After he¡¯s done, he turns his heels and walk away. Tang Xiao Tian looks like he have used up all his energy, resting outside of the court. The scorching sun shines right to his body, stretching his shadow on the ground. He gently balls up his fist, what to do? What should he do? _______________________________________________________________ After at least two hours, the doors of the court are finally opened with people are exiting out of the court. Tang Xiao Tian scrambles up, wiping his face as he approaches a young man. ¡°What¡¯s the sentence?¡± ¡°The kid got six years and the paralyzed guy got 4 years.¡± ¡°Six years?¡± ¡°Yeah, too little right? I thought it would be at least ten years.¡± After he tells Xiao Tian about the sentence, he turns his heels and walks away with his friend. He exhales a sigh of relief, six years, that¡¯s half of what¡¯s expected. He separates himself from the crowd, walking back into the courtroom. He sees Yawang walking to the front, her parents by her side. She sees him and quickly shifts her glance elsewhere. His heart clenches and he takes a step forward, but don¡¯t dare to get too close. Yawang raises her hand and fixes her fringe, then lifts her head to look at him. He takes another step forward and she forcefully smiles at him. ¡°Xiao Tian.¡± ¡°I¡¯m here.¡± He feels his heart trembling and his nose prickling. ¡°If there¡¯s anything you want to talk about, can we wait until tomorrow?¡± Her eyes seem moist as she bites on her lips. ¡°Okay.¡± He answers softly, afraid that he might scare her away. Shu Yawang looks at him with a gentle smile, that smile is like how it was before, so beautiful to see. He believes in her, like how he believed in her before. But on the second day when he sees the letter and the ring outside his door. That ring makes him realize, that smile deceives him for the first time. She returns the ring back to him and she writes the letter with her beautiful handwriting. ¡°Xiao Tian, people always said a hundred years¡¯ effort of repairing a boat yields a thousand years of togetherness. I think, our fate have not add up to a thousand years yet.¡± She left, she¡¯s gone, disappeared, unable to be found. He finally let her go. Chapter 14: The ones who were in love in the beginning, do not stay together in the end Chapter 14: The ones who were in love in the beginning, do not stay together in the end Now you¡¯re back, but you¡¯re not the person I¡¯m waiting for. _______________________________________________________________ After Yawang finish telling this part of the story, it¡¯s already three in the morning. The light is shining brightly in the room with Shu Yawang curled up on the couch, too exhausted to lift her head, her eyes looking empty and confused. Her friend Yuan Zhu, have been crying tears throughout the story. She hugs Yawang tightly, not knowing what to say to comfort her. The two feel the warmth of the light shining on them as they sit still for awhile. ¡°What happened afterwards?¡± Yuan Zhu can¡¯t help but to ask. ¡°Afterwards?¡± Shu Yawang glances down and displays a bitter smile. ¡°Afterwards, I met you.¡± _______________________________________________________________ Five years ago, she bought a train ticket that goes from south to north, secretly leaving her home. The moment the train starts it engine, she feels she have nothing. It¡¯s in that train where she met Yuan Zhu. That time, Shu Yawang was looking at the window with tears falling down her face, then she felt someone tapping onto her shoulder. She ignored that person, but the person kept on tapping on her shoulders. ¡°Miss Xia?¡± ¡°My surname is Shu!¡± She yells as she turns her head around to see who the person is. It¡¯s Xia Mu¡¯s young homeroom teacher! ¡°Oh.¡± The young teacher bites onto her fingers nervously as Yawang glares at her with her teary eyes. After awhile, she decides to speak up cautiously. ¡°Were¡­you crying?¡± ¡°No.¡± She denies as she turns her head away. ¡°Oh.¡± The teacher scratches her head and gives an awkward smile. ¡°Um¡­Miss Xia¡­¡± ¡°I told you my surname is Shu! You¡¯re so annoying!¡± Yawang is so angry that she slammed onto the table. She¡¯s already in a depressed mood, but after meeting this idiotic teacher, she bursted out crying! The teacher bites onto her fingers, shocked to see her cry. She just wants to ask her where¡¯s she going¡­ _______________________________________________________________ When she thinks about the encounter, Shu Yawang can¡¯t help but to laugh, glancing at Yuan Zhu. ¡°That time, you were really an idiot.¡± Yuan Zhu smiles embarrassingly. ¡°You were crying so hard then that it shocked me.¡± That time, she was in S City to be a student teacher. After the training was over, she went to take the train home. There she met Yawang, who looked like a lost child, so sad and confused that she can¡¯t bear to ignore her, so she decided to take the initiative to greet her. After knowing that Yawang have no destination to go to, she suggested to come to W City with her. Yuan Zhu purses her lips and exhales out a sigh. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Time goes by so fast, it¡¯s already been six years¡­¡± Shu Yawang glance down, unable to read her expression. ¡°Yes, six years¡­¡± She raises her head and looks out to the window where it displays the dawn light. She lifts her hand and touches the kissing fish necklace around her neck, squinting her eyes as she said, ¡°Xia Mu is going to be released¡­¡± Once she said his name, her heart clenches. In these few years, she would always dreamt of, dreamt of this cold boy, those pair of empty eyes. She would dreamt of him holding onto a gun with blood dripping where he stand, looking back at her with those empty eyes. ¡°Yawang, no one can bully you.¡± She grips onto the necklace tightly, unknowingly turning anxious. ¡°Then, what about Tang Xiao TIan? Have you seen him these past six years?¡± Yuan Zhu asks her cautiously. Yawang lowers her head and remains silent. After Yuan Zhu sees her turning silent, she heaves out a sigh, not bothering to continue with the question. The light outside the window is turning brighter, and the alarm on Yawang¡¯s phone suddenly rings. She turns off the alarm and stands up. ¡°It¡¯s late now, I should be heading to work.¡± ¡°Okay, be careful. Remember to eat breakfast.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± _______________________________________________________________ Yawang walks towards the bus stop with her head down, it¡¯s still early to be going to work with a few people standing by the bus stop. She don¡¯t need to wait long for the No. 23 bus to arrive in front of them. She climbs up to the bus and swipes her card, sitting herself down near the back of the bus. As the bus starts to move, she stares ahead blankly. After half an hour, the bus stops at the stop near her company. She gets off the bus and walks to a nearby breakfast cafe and orders a bowl of wonton. She waits in her seat, looking out at the window, being able to see the people across the street clearly. She looks far ahead, looking slightly absentminded. Four years ago, this was where she saw Tang Xiao Tian standing across the street. That time, she was away from home for two years, she didn¡¯t tell anyone where she went. In the middle, she missed her mother too much so she decided to call her. Her mother cried on the phone, telling her to take care of herself and to come back whenever she¡¯s ready. Shu Yawang kept on nodding her head at her mother¡¯s words. ¡°After you left, Xiao Tian still kept writing letters to you everyday. He would always come here when he have breaks, he said he won¡¯t look down on you, he will wait for you.¡± Shu Yawang grips onto the phone tightly and bites her lips. ¡°Tell him to not wait for me, don¡¯t wait for me.¡± ¡°Yawang-ah, Xiao Tian wrote you a lot of letters, how about I send them over to you?¡± ¡°No, Mom, don¡¯t send them to me.¡± She quickly rejects her mother¡¯s suggestion. She¡¯s scared of seeing Xiao Tian¡¯s letters, scared that she won¡¯t be able to control how she misses him, scared that she won¡¯t be able to persist, scared that she will betray Xia Mu who is in prison. Even though she rejects the letters, her mother still sends the bulk of letters to her. She didn¡¯t dare to open them, not even one! She stacks them up and hides them underneath her bed. How many times did she wanted to open those letters, she can¡¯t remember¡­ Then one day, as she goes on to her normal routine of heading to work, she sees someone who she didn¡¯t think she will ever see again. She sees him rushing towards her as the cars pass by so she frantically hides herself. She sees him looking frantically at the crowd of people on the streets, trying to find her. She sees him walking towards her direction and shrinks back, thinking that he might find her. But he didn¡¯t, he just got too tired. He leans his body against the wall while she¡¯s been hiding behind that wall, covering her mouth as she whimpers softly. He leans against the wall, biting onto his lips as his eyes redden, looking at the crowd with a sad face. Shu Yawang thought that time was just a coincidence, that he would leave W City soon. However, every day after that encounter, she would see him standing there, trying to look for her, waiting for her. _______________________________________________________________ For three months, he¡¯s been waiting for her every morning in that same spot. Even if Uncle Tang comes over, it¡¯s useless. Shu Yawang sees Uncle Tang beating Xiao Tian up and she feels hurt like how she did when they were young. But this time, Xiao Tian didn¡¯t listen to his father and keeps standing in place to wait for her. She sees Uncle Tang sighing and leaving when he can¡¯t do anything else. Yawang looks at him in a distance, and it¡¯s as if Tang Xiao Tian can sense it when he turns his head around and is able to spot her among the crowd of people. She walks towards him step by step and he looks at her in disbelief as he keeps staring at her. When she stands in front of him, he spreads his arms out and hugs her tightly, unwilling to let her go. Yawang stays still, letting him have her in his embrace. She can¡¯t hold back her tears, she missed his hugs, she missed them. Tang Xiao Tian also tears up, they haven¡¯t said anything after seeing each other for a long time since they know they¡¯re not the Shu Yawang or Tang Xiao Tian they were before. They know that they can¡¯t be together again, because they know, their time is over. ¡°Xiao Tian, go back.¡± She tells him in a soft voice. ¡°Yawang, Yawang, Yawang.¡± He cries as he keeps on repeating her name. This tough man is crying, wetting her shoulder with his tears. She bites on her lips and tells him to go back again. ¡°Go back, go back, I¡¯m begging you.¡± ¡°Yawang, go with me. I will stay by your side and not go anywhere else. I will stay by your side and not have you wait for me. I will stay by your side and not let anyone bully you, let me stay by your side¡­¡± Yawang shakes her head and starts to sob out loud. ¡°It¡¯s late, it¡¯s too late. Xiao Tian, it¡¯s really too late. I can¡¯t be with you. I¡¯ve been waiting, been waiting for you to come back, waiting for so long, but at the end I couldn¡¯t wait for you till the end.¡± ¡°Now you¡¯re back, but you¡¯re not the one who I¡¯m waiting for.¡± ¡°No, no.¡± Tang Xiao Tian tightens his grip around her, unwilling to let her go! ¡°Xiao Tian, you said this before, that you were not afraid if I go somewhere far, go look at more beautiful sceneries, or to meet a better man. Now, I¡¯m somewhere far away, really far away. I¡¯m not going back, not going back to your side.¡± She turns her head and walks away as she sobs. Tang Xiao Tian looks at her back and slowly crouches down, hiding his face with his hand in agony¡­ _______________________________________________________________ The breakfast cafe is bustling with customers, their voices raising as they call out their orders. The corner of Yawang¡¯s eyes are slightly moist when a fat body strides towards her, putting down her bowl of wonton in front of her. ¡°Miss, your wonton.¡± Shu Yawang awakens from her memories and inhales deeply, turning her head to look at the waiter. ¡°Thank you.¡± She thanks him politely. She eats her breakfast bit by bit, a drop of tear accidentally falling down into the bowl. The ones who were in love in the beginning, do not stay together in the end. The ones who were in love in the beginning, goes off to different directions in the end. The ones who were in love in the beginning, cannot tightly embrace each other when they meet again. The ones who were in love in the beginning, cannot give each other deep kisses when they meet again. The ones who were in love in the beginning¡­ Chapter 15: You can love for a lifetime, you can also hate for a lifetime Chapter 15: You can love for a lifetime, you can also hate for a lifetime Loving for a lifetime or hating for a lifetime, I want you to remember me for a lifetime. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Xiao Shu, I¡¯m putting you in charge for designing this almond blossom park project.¡± The Geo Landscape¡¯s CEO hands over the biggest project of the year to Shu Yawang. ¡°I will do my best.¡± She nods her head sternly. ¡°Alright, if there¡¯s nothing else, let¡¯s end the meeting!¡± The CEO waves his hand and everyone stands up to leave the conference room. Yawang is among the crowd, clutching onto the conference memo pad. The intern, Lin Yu Chen, who is walking beside her, smiles. ¡°Shu Jie, let me assist you this time, I want to learn more from you.¡± Yawang walks straight ahead without looking at him. She didn¡¯t give much thought when she tells him, ¡°Okay.¡± Lin Yu Chen is so happy that he bows down to her. ¡°Thank you Shu Jie!¡± Yawang sees his energetic smile and displays a gentle expression. However, as soon as she turns her head, the gentle expression disappears. Her eyes turn cold as she looks at the end of the hallway. Lin Yu Chen follows her gaze and sees the same man that they bumped into the night before. That man is smiling gently at Yawang, that person, if he remembered right, is Yawang¡¯s ex-husband. Lin Yu Chen turns his head back to look at Yawang, seeing her brushing off some stray hair near her ear before walking towards the man. _______________________________________________________________ ¡°Looking for me?¡± She asks coldly. ¡°Of course.¡± Shu Yawang looks back to Lin Yu Chen and he nods his head before going away, leaving just them two in the hallway. She narrows her eyebrows at him. ¡°Why are you looking for me?¡± Before she left, she asked a lawyer to help her with the divorce. Since the marriage was involuntary, the procedures were processed smoothly and they were officially divorced six months after she left. Shu Yawang heard that Qu Wei Ran applied for pardon of sentence for medical treatment and went to America for the treatment. Seeing how he is now, it seems like he is recovering well. Qu Wei Ran looks at her with a smile. ¡°I missed you, want to see you.¡± Yawang didn¡¯t bother to blink an eye when she gives him a sarcastic look. ¡°You¡¯ve seen me now, so you may leave.¡± ¡°Yawang-ah, why do you always treat me like this?¡± Qu Wei Ran¡¯s handsome face carrying a trace of grief. He bends his waist slightly as he leans towards her. ¡°If you¡¯re going to be like this, I¡¯ll get angry.¡± Yawang didn¡¯t step back as she stares at him with her cold eyes. ¡°You think I¡¯ll be afraid after you said that? Qu Wei Ran, let me tell you, the me who have nothing now is not afraid of you. If you want to die, try to provoke me again.¡± She didn¡¯t bother to look at him as she walks past him to leave. Qu Wei Ran turns his body fiercely and pulls her back. ¡°Shu Yawang, you turned more gutsy now.¡± She didn¡¯t struggle from his grasp and narrows her eyebrows at him. ¡°Haven¡¯t you had enough?! How long will you keep pestering me? I don¡¯t have the happiness that you¡¯re jealous of, I¡¯m no longer anyone¡¯s girlfriend. You already destroyed everything I have, what else do you want? Do you want me to die? If I die, will you let me go?¡± Yawang covers her face with her free hand and looks at him with a tired expression. ¡°Qu Wei Ran! What do you want from me?!¡± He grips onto her hand tightly, not saying a word. ¡°Tell me! What is it that you want from me?!¡± She asks him forcefully. ¡°Can you love me?¡± Qu Wei Ran¡¯s eyes show a slight trace of panic. This man whose nearly thirty years old, flusters as he makes his confession. ¡°Yawang, can you love me?¡± Yawang turns shocked, then starts to laugh. ¡°Qu Wei Ran, you¡¯re really funny.¡± ¡°That¡¯s why I hate you, because in your eyes, I¡¯m always funny.¡± He lets go of her hand and wipes away the hurtful expression his eyes displayed. ¡°I¡¯m this type of person, I must get what I like, and destroy it if I can¡¯t get it.¡± ¡°But Yawang, after I ruined you, I still missed you. Even thought you never said anything positive to me, or smiled at me, I still missed you.¡± He pauses momentarily before continuing. ¡°I don¡¯t regret what I have done to you, loving for a lifetime or hating for a lifetime, I want you to remember me for a lifetime.¡± Shu Yawang didn¡¯t say anything, she don¡¯t know what to say. When talking to Qu Wei Ran, she¡¯s always speechless, speechless in anger, in hatred, in annoyance. Even from his confession, she¡¯s still speechless. He steps away from her, ¡°Don¡¯t worry, I won¡¯t look for you anymore.¡± He turns his heels and leave, Yawang watching his back until he disappears in the end of the hallway before she turns around and leave. If they haven¡¯t met, wouldn¡¯t it have been better? _______________________________________________________________ In the weekend, Yawang wakes up early to wash herself up, getting out her makeup to create a natural and elegant look. Then, she opens her closet, finally being able to pick a set of clothes with white as its theme after contemplating for a long time. She looks at herself in the mirror, raising her arm and untying her hair that was in a bun, letting her hair flow down freely, her long hair and natural curls making her look more stylish. She looks at the mirror with a smile, looking at herself carefully. Compared to six years ago, she exudes a more mature woman aura, losing a dash of pure temperament. Yawang exhales a long string of breath, really, how can I be feeling nervous now? She picks up her purse and walks out of her room, Yuan Zhu is currently eating breakfast in the living room when she sees her. ¡°Wah, what are you doing today dressing up so nicely?¡± Yawang opens the door and flashes a smile. ¡°I¡¯m going to pick up Xia Mu.¡± ¡°Oh, Xia Mu is being released today?¡± She asks in a loud voice, but the reply she receives is the door shutting. Yawang calls a taxi cab to take her to the bus station, then buys a ticket to go to S City, then transfers to another bus to go to the S City¡¯s prison center. _______________________________________________________________ The metal gate of the prison center is shut firmly, and by the time Yawang gets there, it¡¯s around two in the afternoon. She lowers her head and checks her watch, breathing out a sigh of relief when she¡¯s sure that she¡¯s not late. There is a large open space outside of the center, with not one single object to block one¡¯s view. As the wind blows onto her hair, she brushes her hair away that is blocking her vision. After waiting for awhile, the main entrance door opens up, creating a piercing sound. She hurriedly places her hand down and walks a couple steps forward. She looks closely, seeing another door behind the main entrance door opening up, and a pair of long legs stepping forward, followed by its skinny and tall body frame. He walks two steps forward, standing below the sunlight, lifting his head up and squinting his eyes to see the clear, blue sky. Shu Yawang looks at him from afar, he¡¯s wearing a navy blue jacket and a baseball cap, his beautiful and exquisite face loses the trace of youthful innocence. He seems to find her staring as he blinks his eyes and turns his head around, looking back at her. He still have that expressionless look, she looks at him as the corners of her lips lift up, giving him a light smile as she looks at him. When he sees her smile, his facial expression softens and the corners of his lips slowly lifts up. Beneath the sunlight, the two who are standing a distance apart, looks at each other, smiling at one another. No one knows who steps forward first, but the distance between the two starts to diminish, the two stopping when they¡¯re only one step away from each other. Shu Yawang lifts her head to look at him, Xia Mu have grown taller and more handsome, but his aura haven¡¯t changed with his skinny, handsome face displaying the same expressionless look, his eyes still looking empty and cold, and his never-changing dark circles. Yawang looks at him closely, looks at him carefully, her lips carrying a smile, but her eyes reddening with tears, the tears flowing down her face. Xia Mu raises his hand to wipe the tears away, and she brings down his hand and holds onto it tightly. She looks down to his hand, it¡¯s now firm and rough. She rubs his palm and suddenly cries out loud, his hands¡­his pair of beautiful hands that are like a piece of artwork¡­now it¡¯s filled with scars and calluses, just like those construction workers. Just how much did he suffered? She rubs his hand with force, trying to smooth out the calluses on his hand. Xia Mu sighs out loud and pulls his hand away to pull her into his embrace, hugging her tightly. ¡°Don¡¯t cry, you know I¡¯m scared to see you cry.¡± He tells her softly. Yawang raises her arms to hug him back, nodding her head in his embrace. ¡°I¡¯m not crying, I won¡¯t cry.¡± She speaks with a choked voice. She hugs Xia Mu for awhile as she cries, and when she finally calms down, she rubs her face in his embrace to dry her tears. Then, she lifts her head and gives him a big smile. ¡°Xia Mu, welcome back.¡± He gives a small smirk. ¡°Mmm.¡± _______________________________________________________________ On the way back, Xia Mu is in a deep sleep, leaning his head on Yawang¡¯s shoulder. She holds onto his hand and looks at him with a sad face. He must not have slept well in prison. Look, his dark circles got worse. He must not have ate well in prison, look, there¡¯s no meat on his face. She bites onto her lips, trying to hold back her tears. She wants to wake him up and holds him tight, telling him that all of his suffering is over. From now on, she will stay by his side, living the life that he wants, and do the things that he want to do. She will not have him suffer anymore, will not have him hurt again. At this time, her phone rings and she frantically search for it, afraid to wake Xia Mu up. She turns her head away as she answers the call. ¡°Hello?¡± ¡°Yawang, did you pick up Xia Mu yet?¡± Her father asks. ¡°Yes I did.¡± ¡°How is he?¡± ¡°Pretty well, pretty energetic.¡± ¡°That¡¯s good, take care of him well.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t worry Dad, I know.¡± ¡°Okay, then I¡¯ll hang up now. Bring him back soon.¡± The two exchange a few more words before hanging up. She turns her head to look at Xia Mu, only to see him awake but his head is still resting on her shoulder, not moving an inch. ¡°Did I woke you up?¡± ¡°No.¡± In fact, he was not sleeping at all, he just likes to lean on her like that. He remembered that when he was little, he always lean by her side, but as years passed by, he haven¡¯t done such action again. This feeling of closeness, he really missed it, and he really likes it. Yawang sees that Xia Mu don¡¯t have the intention to get up, so she didn¡¯t move either, letting him continue to lean on her. She turns her head to look at the window, the scenery passing by backwards. Many things have happened within the past six years; two years ago, Xia Mu¡¯s grandfather was diagnosed with liver cancer and got sent to America for treatment. Originally, he should be back by the time Xia Mu was released, but he just had surgery not too long ago and it¡¯s not recommended to take the airplane so soon. Besides, Xia Mu rejects anyone else who wants to pick him up instead of her. In Xia Mu¡¯s heart, besides his grandfather, she is his only loved one. _______________________________________________________________ The train slowly stops as it reaches S City, and as the two exit out of the train, they see a black limousine parked right in front of them. The door from the driver seat¡¯s side opens, revealing Lieutenant Cheng. He walks up to them excitedly and pats his hand onto Xia Mu¡¯s shoulder. ¡°Xia Mu.¡± ¡°Uncle Cheng.¡± They both greet him. ¡°Ah ah.¡± His eyes start to redden and he turns his face away as he opens the limousine door. ¡°Didn¡¯t forget Uncle Cheng, knowing you¡¯re going home so telling me to pick you up.¡± ¡°That¡¯s nonsense Uncle Cheng, how can we ever forget you?¡± Yawang laughs. Xia Mu puts their luggages in the trunk first, then sits inside the limousine while holding onto Yawang¡¯s hand. ¡°Sorry for troubling you, Uncle.¡± ¡°What kind of trouble? I¡¯m your family¡¯s driver.¡± He continues to speak as he starts the engine. ¡°Since your grandfather is not here, I haven¡¯t drove for such a long time.¡± ¡°You¡¯re exaggerating, Uncle.¡± Yawang laughs. ¡°How is Grandpa¡¯s health?¡± Xia Mu asks him. Everytime he called him, he always said he¡¯s well, he¡¯ll return to China soon, but he¡¯s waiting until now, and his grandfather is still not back yet. In fact, he wants Xia Mu to come over. ¡°He¡¯s well, they said the surgery was successful, but he just need to rest for a few months.¡± Xia Mu turns more relaxed to Uncle Cheng¡¯s reply. ¡°That¡¯s good.¡± The car ride is at least ten minutes long, and by the time they reached to the military compound, it¡¯s already two in the morning. Uncle Cheng stops the car and turns his body to wake the two people up, who are leaning on each other as they fell asleep. _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang opens her eyes and looks out the window, even though it¡¯s very dark, it feels familiar to her. The row of dragon juniper trees outside of the entrance looked like it didn¡¯t grew at all; the Chinese parasol tree have lost all its leaves from the winter wind, and the trimmed wintersweet trees are filled with milky white buds preparing to blossom. All of these seems so familiar to her, as if she just left yesterday. She closes her eyes and is able to retrieve all the memories she had in the military compound when she was young. ¡°Yawang?¡± Xia Mu asks as he pulls her arm. She opens her eyes and gives a light smile. ¡°We¡¯re home.¡± ¡°Mmm.¡± He nods his head and looks back at her. ¡°We¡¯re home.¡± ¡°Hurry and go in.¡± Uncle Cheng rushes them in, and before the three reaches the doorsteps, the door opens. Auntie Mei, who have been the Xia family¡¯s maid for so long, brings out a brazier to place in front of the door for Xia Mu to step over, then she hands him a bowl of pig feet noodles to eat. Afterwards, she carries the empty bowl and looks at Xia Mu with a comforting look. ¡°Now it¡¯s good, all the bad luck will be gone. Young master must go and take a hot shower now and burn the clothes you¡¯re wearing so from now on, you will have good luck.¡± ¡°You need burn the clothes too?¡± Uncle Cheng asks in a suspicious tone. Auntie Mei nods her head firmly. ¡°We can¡¯t have the bad luck lingering outside the door, we must burn the clothes.¡± ¡°What Auntie Mei said is right, we should burn the clothes.¡± Shu Yawang agrees. Xia Mu have no opinion, if they want to burn them, then burn them, he owns many clothes anyway. Auntie Mei rushes Xia Mu to take a shower. He looks back at Yawang, looking like he wants to tell her something, but holds back. After Xia Mu comes out from the shower and sees the empty living room, the disappointment he feels in his heart is slightly unbearable. He lowers his gaze and walks up the stairs to the third floor, his bedroom door slightly ajar with a strip of light escaping from the space. His eyes brighten and he strides forward, gently opening the door, seeing Yawang lying down on his bed. Maybe it¡¯s because she¡¯s been transferring between buses for three days, she¡¯s exhausted and fell into a deep sleep. Xia Mu¡¯s expression turns gentle as he walks over with light steps, slowly crouching by her side. The light from the desk lamp is still on, the light shining onto Yawang¡¯s beautiful profile, her black hair fanning out onto the pillow. Xia Mu looks at her like that, like how he did before. He wouldn¡¯t dare to touch her, he would just crouch by her side and look at her quietly, he¡¯s satisfied with that. Suddenly, the silver necklace around Yawang¡¯s neck attracts his attention. He lifts his right hand and pulls out the necklace, revealing a beautiful silver kissing fish. His left hand reaches over his neck, he also have that silver kissing fish. He personally helped her wore this pair of silver kissing fishes necklace on this same bed when he was seventeen years old. He told her to always wear it, that was also when he confessed to her. In a blink of an eye, so many years have passed by. At the time, did he kissed her? He can¡¯t remember clearly what happened that night, he only remembered that pounding sensation. He¡¯s been enchanted, she always have the ability to make him be in a daze. He slowly lean towards her, his heart beating fast whenever he¡¯s close to her, making him unable to breathe. _______________________________________________________________ Then at this time, Shu Yawang¡¯s eyelashes flutter, slowly opening her eyes, looking at him. They¡¯re really close to each other, able to feel each other¡¯s breath. When she blinks her eyes, Xia Mu quickly move away, pursing his lips. ¡°You¡¯re still wearing it?¡± He asks awkwardly. She looks down to her necklace around her neck and nods her head. ¡°Yeah.¡± Xia Mu tilts his head to the side. ¡°Why?¡± She sits up on the bed and fixes her hair, looking at him with uncertainty. ¡°Didn¡¯t you tell me to keep wearing it?¡± ¡°Oh.¡± He glances down in disappointment, it¡¯s just her sticking to her promise, nothing special. ¡°How about you?¡± ¡°Huh?¡± ¡°This one.¡± She shakes the fish around her neck and smiles. ¡°You¡¯re still wearing yours?¡± ¡°Of course.¡± He takes out an old-looking red string from underneath his collar, revealing the silver fish that is stringed in. He have it by his side for six years, whenever he can¡¯t sleep at night, he will cover it with his hand and presses it above his chest, from that, he feels calm. Shu Yawang leans over, extending her arm and reaching for the red string, placing the silver fish onto her palm and looking at it. ¡°Little fish, little fish, did you miss me?¡± She shakes her own little fish around her neck and continues, ¡°I really missed you.¡± Xia Mu looks at her with a slight smirk, his eyes full of smiles. Yawang continues to play with the two fishes. ¡°Ah, we haven¡¯t seen each other for a long time, let¡¯s kiss.¡± He sees Yawang moving towards him and he looks at her, slightly shocked, unable to breathe. When he thinks that she¡¯s about to kiss him, she pulls the two fishes together and have them them kiss each other. He looks away in slight disappointment and Yawang laughs at him. She leans over and closes her eyes as she plants a small kiss on his forehead. She moves back and looks at him with a gentle smile. ¡°Xia Mu, let¡¯s be together.¡± ¡°What did you say?¡± ¡°Let¡¯s be together. What? You don¡¯t want to?¡± ¡°No¡­¡± He shakes his head violently. ¡°It¡¯s just, why did you suddenly make this decision?¡± ¡°Suddenly?¡± She laughs. ¡°It¡¯s not suddenly, I made this decision six years ago when I gave you the little fish.¡± ¡°If you still love me, we¡¯ll be together. So, Xia Mu, do you still love me?¡± Xia Mu can¡¯t hold himself back anymore, he hugs her back tightly, bringing her into his embrace and burying his face in her hair, his lips resting near her ear. ¡°I love you, I love you, Yawang, I always loved you.¡± He whispers softly into her ear. Yawang who is in his embrace, buries her face within his embrace and closes her eyes. ¡°Mmm, I¡¯ve been waiting, waiting for you to come out to say you love me.¡± Xia Mu bends over and kisses Yawang¡¯s soft lips. She¡¯s a little nervous, her eyelashes batting constantly as she feels her lips and face turning hot. Xia Mu¡¯s eyes are full of smiles, then he closes them as he presses his lips onto hers harder. Yawang can feel her heart beating fast, closing her eyes and returning back the kiss. His kiss is light and gentle, not too deep, like a gentle rub onto her lips, resting onto hers instead of occupying her¡¯s. _______________________________________________________________ After a while, he finally part his lips away from hers. She looks down, feeling slightly embarrassed to look at him, the corners of her eyes carrying a trace of shyness. Xia Mu lifts his hand to stroke her burning face, his breathing turning heavy. Half of his body is pressing against hers, and both of her hands are resting on his chest. Her hands are able to feel his strong heartbeat, and she is able to hear her own racing heartbeat. He gives a slight smirk and leans over, closing his eyes as he plants a kiss onto her forehead. Then, he moves away and lies down next to her, stretching his arm out to pull her in his embrace and burying his face in the crook of her neck. ¡°Good night, Yawang.¡± Shu Yawang waits until Xia Mu to breathe in a normal pace first before exhaling out a long sigh of relief. She is slightly afraid that he will hug her even though she prepared herself for it, but..she¡¯s still afraid. She turns her head and looks at Xia Mu. She always think that Xia Mu is an angel, he¡¯s always so clean and pure, with no impurity to be seen. When she stays by his side, she feels very warm, very reassuring, very calm. She likes this feeling, a lot. This is good, Xia Mu will treat her well and she will love Xia Mu. So this is good, being able to spend their lives in a calm and reassuring manner, this is also considered to be happiness! Chapter 16: A man’s tears (pt. 1) Chapter 16: A man¡¯s tears (pt. 1) One waited, but waited too early; one returned, but returned too late. You can only blame their fate being too short, not reaching a thousand years. _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang is currently online in her room when her mother pushes the door open, holding onto a glass of warm milk. Yawang takes the glass of milk and smiles to her mother. ¡°Thank you, Mom.¡± Her mother sits on a corner of the bed and looks at her. Yawang takes a sip of milk and turns her head. ¡°Why are you looking at me?¡± ¡°I can¡¯t look at my own daughter?¡± She smiles. ¡°Look, look. Good-looking?¡± Her mother laughs and raises her hand to ruffle Yawang¡¯s hair. ¡°Good-looking, how can my daughter not be good-looking?¡± She smiles as she shakes her head, maybe in just her mother¡¯s eyes, she is good-looking. ¡°Are you really going to marry Xia Mu? Go to America with him?¡± Her mother asks. ¡°Yeah.¡± Her mother turns silent for awhile. ¡°You really want to go with him?¡± ¡°Yes, I do.¡± Her mother exhales out a sigh. ¡°I know you were just like when you were little, once you made your decision, you wouldn¡¯t change it. It¡¯s just that a big topic like marriage needs to be considered carefully, this kid Xia Mu likes you now, but he¡¯s younger than you by six years. Until he¡¯s your age, you will be old, what if he have a change of heart¡­¡± ¡°Mom.¡± She interrupts her. ¡°You don¡¯t need to worry about this at all, Xia Mu is not that type of person.¡± ¡°Alright, let¡¯s not talk about that, but he¡¯s not even in an university, he doesn¡¯t have anything. How long are you going to wait for him to be able to support you? Besides, when you two go to America, neither of you will have a job, both of you will need to use money from his family, you can survive living those kind of days?¡± ¡°Mom, what are you doing? Why are you saying these things?¡± Yawang knits her eyebrows. ¡°You don¡¯t like Xia Mu?¡± Her mother grunts in a complaining tone. ¡°How can I not like him? Ever since the day he came back, if I dare to say one bad thing about him, you and your dad will eat me alive.¡± ¡°Mom!¡± She interrupts her again. ¡°Since your father owes them a life and you owe them a favor, I won¡¯t stop you from using yourself to return the favor. I just missed that child, Xiao Tian. He¡¯s great and he¡¯s loyal to you, I really wanted him to become our son in-law, and I know that you still miss him.¡± ¡°Mom, don¡¯t talk about Tang Xiao Tian.¡± She turns her head away, not wanting to hear anymore of it. Her mother sighs again. ¡°Look at you, I just said two sentences about him and you don¡¯t want me to continue. What happens if you two bump into each other in the military compound, what are you going to do? Turn around and run away?¡± ¡°I won¡¯t bump into him, he¡¯s in Yunnan now, he won¡¯t come back so soon. By the time he comes back, I¡¯m already in America.¡± Yawang dips her head and holds onto her hands. ¡°Our fate has already came to an end.¡± She murmurs softly. ¡°Yawang, you¡¯re really sure about this?¡± Her mother places her hand on top of Yawang¡¯s. She still don¡¯t agree to her daughter¡¯s decision. For her, only Tang Xiao Tian is able to give her daughter happiness, she hopes her daughter can marry someone who can take care of her, be attentive to her, and who she can rely on. In her eyes, Xia Mu is just a child who her daughter needs to take care of. Yawang heaves out a long sigh, lifting her head up to smile at her mother. ¡°Mom, I thought carefully about this. I thought about this decision for six years, it won¡¯t be wrong. Xia Mu looks cold on the outside, but he¡¯s a very warm person. He¡¯s really great and he loves me a lot, I will be happy.¡± ¡°Mom can¡¯t beat you in this, if you think it¡¯s good, then it¡¯s good.¡± Her mother shakes her head and stands up to leave. ¡°Sleep early, don¡¯t play so long.¡± ¡°I know.¡± Yawang nods her head. She lifts the glass off from her table and gulps down the milk that turned cold, the light from the monitor beaming to her face. The corners of her lips are slightly lifted, displaying a light smile that looks a little stiff and stubborn. _______________________________________________________________ There are some things that you can¡¯t say that you¡¯ll be sure of; Shu Yawang said that she will not bump into Tang Xiao Tian, but then, they bump into each other in the military compound near the crossroads the next day. She stands there stunned, unable to give a response, and just stare at him. Xiao Tian is dressed in a 07-style military uniform, making him look slender and handsome, easily able to attract attention. Tang Xiao Tian didn¡¯t think he will bump into her either. He stares back at her, his eyes showing greed. How long has it been since he saw her? Too long, it¡¯s been too long that he don¡¯t want to count. He unknowingly steps forward and extends his hand to hold on to her¡¯s. From then, Yawang snaps back to reality and lightly remove her hand away from his, and steps back. Xiao Tian awkwardly put his hand back to his side and Yawang bites onto her lips as she stuffs her hands into the pockets of her jacket. She lifts her head and displays a stiff smile. ¡°Why did you come back?¡± ¡°There are some things from the army that I need to come back to do.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± She nods her head. ¡°What about you? Why did you come back?¡± ¡°I came back with Xia Mu.¡± ¡°Oh, I see.¡± Yawang looks at the ground, not saying a word. Xiao Tian don¡¯t know what else to say either, the two just standing there without saying anything. The two who wants to see each other, can¡¯t even look at each other in the face when they actually meet. ¡°Oh right, I¡¯m meeting up with Zhang Jing Yu tomorrow, do you want to go together?¡± Xiao Tian looks at her with anticipation. ¡°Jing Yu said¡­.that he misses you.¡± Yawang clenches her fists inside the pockets of her jacket. ¡°No, I need to head back to W City tomorrow, I have a lot of things to take care of at work.¡± ¡°We can do it today too, let me call him.¡± As he is about to call Zhang Jing Yu, Yawang puts her hand out to stop him, raising her head and looking at him with a sad expression. ¡°Xiao Tian, forget it.¡± ¡°Why forget it?¡± He looks back at her with a sad expression. ¡°Why are you telling me to forget it?¡± Yawang lowers her head and speaks in a rushed tone. ¡°I¡¯m going to America with Xia Mu and then I will marry him.¡± She tells him with her head down the whole time. No matter how long it has been, Yawang is unable to face Xiao Tian, can¡¯t bear to see him get hurt. What¡¯s funny is that the person who hurts him all the time is her! Tang Xiao Tian didn¡¯t say anything for awhile and continues to stare at her. ¡°You made your decision?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± She continues to look at the ground, unable to face him. ¡°That¡¯s pretty good, it¡¯s a good decision for Xia Mu to go to America.¡± His eyes start to redden as he gives a forceful smile. ¡°I still have things to do, I¡¯ll leave first.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± He dips his head down and walks past her and she is able to hear him murmur, ¡°Good-bye, Yawang.¡± Shu Yawang looks straight ahead, her tears falling down to the ground. ¡°Good-bye, Xiao Tian.¡± During the moment he walks past her, it seems like they both are thinking about the summer when they were both eighteen years old. At this crossroads, the flying red flower, the promise they made then¡­ ¡°I will wait for you to return.¡± The girl said. ¡°I will definitely be back.¡± The boy said. But at the end¡­one waited, but waited too early; one returned, but returned too late. You can only blame their fate being too short, not reaching a thousand years. _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang bites on her lips and keeps walking forward with her head down. Suddenly, a pair of sneakers appear in front of her. She lifts her head up, unable to see clearly because of her tears. She blinks once, making the tears slip down, and there, she is able to see clearly who is standing in front of her. ¡°Xia Mu¡­¡± He looks at her, his lips moving slightly, like he¡¯s about to say something, but he didn¡¯t. He takes a big step forward, holding onto Yawang as he uses his jacket sleeve to roughly wipe away the tears on her face. Then, he holds onto her hand. ¡°Let¡¯s go back to W City.¡± She knits her eyebrows and steals a glance to see his facial expression. She wants to apologize, but doesn¡¯t know where to start, so she just lets him drag her. Xia Mu pulls Yawang with a cold face, and as they turn a corner, he can¡¯t help it but to look back, seeing Tang Xiao Tian standing in place, looking at them in sorrow. They meet each other¡¯s gaze, Xiao Tian giving him a pleading gaze, hoping he will treat her well. Xia Mu avoids his gaze; he hates him, no matter when it was before or now, he hates him, hates him forever! Because the person he loves, loves him, even if he is holding onto her tightly, he still feels uneasy. He¡¯s afraid that she will yank his hand away from her and run back to his side. So, he can only pull her away from here. Tang Xiao Tian sees them turn a corner and their shadows soon disappear. He gives a bitter smile and dips his head down, slowly turning his body to leave. He takes out the phone in his pocket and dials a number. ¡°Jing Yu, let¡¯s go have a drink.¡± ¡°Alright, let¡¯s meet at the usual place.¡± Xiao Tian walks to the parking lot to get his car, he still uses the old jeep that his father gave to him after he retired. He opens the car door and climbs onto the seat, igniting the engine. He stares ahead blankly, looking at the familiar roads going backwards. He drives for awhile until he suddenly makes a stop. He leans against the steering wheel and starts to cry out loud. He knows he¡¯s a man, he can¡¯t cry like this, he knows he¡¯s a soldier, he can¡¯t cry like this. But, she¡¯s leaving, she¡¯s really leaving. She¡¯s leaving her home, the military compound, leaving S City, leaving China. She¡¯s going somewhere far away, so far that he won¡¯t be able to see her, won¡¯t be able to see her again¡­ _______________________________________________________________ The same evening after they encountered Tang Xiao Tian, Xia Mu pulls Yawang away to go to W City. During the ride, Xia Mu have a sullen expression. Shu Yawang turns nervous, not knowing what to say. It¡¯s not until they landed that Xia Mu¡¯s expression turn more calm. When they arrived to W City, it¡¯s half past midnight. Yawang turns more energetic and drags Xia Mu to the place she¡¯s living. When she opens the door, she stands there in shock. The apartment is extremely messy, the couch is draped with women clothing, the floor is filled with snacks that were bought from the supermarket, and the coffee table is full with unfinished meals and dirty dishes. Yawang heaves out a long sigh and shakes her head. ¡°This Yuan Zhu, once I¡¯m not here, she turns this apartment into this.¡± Xia Mu didn¡¯t say anything and lifts up his leg to enter the apartment. Yawang quickly pulls him back, how can she have him stay in such a dirty environment? She turns her body and walks towards the kitchen to grab a stool, wiping off the dust with a towel then pulling him and having him sit on it. ¡°Sit here first, let me go clean up.¡± Xia Mu pulls her back and lowers his head, lifting his head back up after thinking silently for awhile. ¡°Do you have to take care of me so carefully?¡± ¡°Huh?¡± ¡°Yawang, I¡¯m already grown up.¡± Xia Mu holds onto her hand tightly and looks at her in the eye. ¡°I don¡¯t want to be the boy that you constantly sheltered.¡± Shu Yawang looks at him stunned, she just wants him to be in a clean and comfortable environment, she didn¡¯t want him to feel uncomfortable. Does he feel unhappy that I want to do this for him? She don¡¯t know what to say to him, so she only looks at him helplessly. Xia Mu stands up and pulls her to the stool and have her sit before turning his body to clean the apartment. He grabs the bowls and chopsticks filled with oil to the kitchen sink and throws out all of the styrofoam boxes that are lying on the coffee table into the trash can. There are many instances where Yawang wants to stand up and help him, but he will glare at her all the time. She looks at him cleaning the apartment with worry and amusement. When he is about to attack Yuan Zhu¡¯s bundle of dirty clothes, Yawang can¡¯t take it anymore and stands up to stop him. ¡°Xia Mu.¡± He turns around to look at her. ¡°Don¡¯t clean anymore. You told me to not take care of you so carefully, but you¡¯re just the same. Things such as cleaning are what girls supposed to do.¡± He shakes his head and replies in a calm tone. ¡°It¡¯s not that, now you¡¯re by my side, you don¡¯t need to do anything.¡± Yawang lowers her head and smiles, she don¡¯t know what to say, but the sweet feeling she feels in her heart is about to pour out. She knows it¡¯s not sweet talk since Xia Mu doesn¡¯t know how say these things. But it¡¯s also because of that, she feels more touched. She doesn¡¯t know what to say, so she steps forward and hugs Xia Mu tightly. She wants to send her feelings to him, wants to tell him that she also don¡¯t want him to do anything, she don¡¯t want him to be even slightly unhappy. Xia Mu raises his arms and hugs her back, burying his handsome face onto her shoulder, smelling her familiar scent. They hug for a long time, and when they grow tired from standing, Xia Mu carry her to sit on the black couch. The two are hugging each other on the couch, his long fingers gently twirling her hair, and she rests in his embrace, listening to his heartbeat. He likes her scent, her warmth, he don¡¯t want to let go. She likes his hugs, his warmth, she don¡¯t want to leave. They will converse from time to time, with Yawang asking him in a soft voice, ¡°Xia Mu, do you still remember the almond blossom trees behind the school?¡± ¡°I remember.¡± ¡°Do you know that you looked the most handsome when you¡¯re standing right in the middle of the almond blossoms?¡± ¡°Do you like it?¡± ¡°I like it.¡± When Shu Yawang said she likes it, the corners of Xia Mu¡¯s lips lifts up again, his beautiful eyes twinkling; this is different from how he normally is. The two look out of the window and see the bright, starry sky, the moonlight is very beautiful, very captivating. _______________________________________________________________ The next morning, Yuan Zhu is standing right in front of Shu Yawang as she opens her eyes, Yuan Zhu¡¯s eyes behind her glasses revealing a teasing expression. Yawang extends her arm to hit Yuan Zhu¡¯s face away. ¡°Why are you smiling like that?¡± Yuan Zhu raises one of her eyebrows towards what¡¯s diagonal from her, so Yawang turns her head and look. She sees Xia Mu who she uses his legs as a pillow, awake. He is leaning against the couch, his eyes showing a clear expression, like he¡¯s been awaken for awhile. Yawang sits up and smiles at Xia Mu. ¡°You¡¯re awake?¡± ¡°Mhm.¡± Yawang seems a little embarrassed to get up, and she don¡¯t know why, but after last night, she feels something is different, they seem a lot closer now. ¡°Xia Mu, do you still remember me?¡± Yuan Zhu asks with a smile. Xia Mu nods his head. ¡°Miss Yuan.¡± She squints her eyes as she smiles, like Xia Mu remembering her is a huge event. ¡°Haha, that¡¯s my student alright, having such great memory.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t be so smug.¡± Yawang grumbles as she points at the messy apartment. ¡°Look at how you made our apartment look so messy, hurry up and clean it.¡± ¡°I originally wanted to clean up, but now I don¡¯t want to.¡± She smiles. ¡°In order to have you two to enjoy your sweet moments together, I decided to move out.¡± She clasps her hands together, making a crisp and sharp sound. ¡°Of course, if you want to thank me, you can help me clean the apartment.¡± Yawang shakes her head in disagreement. ¡°You wish. You can leave if you want, but you have to clean up first.¡± ¡°Then I¡¯m not going to leave.¡± ¡°Fine, I don¡¯t mind.¡± As the two women continue to have their argument, Xia Mu is already standing up and starting to clean the apartment. ¡°Wow, Xia Mu really wants me to leave.¡± Yuan Zhu laughs out loud. Xia Mu moves slightly, his facial expression remaining calm, but also turning a little stiff. He is thinking silently, wanting to explain himself, but after thinking for awhile, he didn¡¯t say anything. Yuan Zhu points to him and laughs. ¡°See? He agrees.¡± Shu Yawang pats her arm down. ¡°Don¡¯t make fun of Xia Mu just because he don¡¯t like to talk.¡± ¡°Look at how hurt you are, hahahaha.¡± ¡°Fine, I¡¯ll go clean the apartment, get out of here.¡± ¡°Oh, Yawang also can¡¯t wait for me to leave.¡± Shu Yawang raises one of her fists. ¡°There is a limit with my patience!¡± Yuan Zhu laughs out loud and walks into her room to grab her belongings, continuing to laugh as she walks out and giving Yawang a sneaky grin. Soon, she is gone like the wind, and the apartment turns silent. Yawang fixes up her hair and is about to reach for the broom that¡¯s in Xia Mu¡¯s hand, but Xia Mu successfully avoids her. ¡°Let me sweep.¡± She sees how stubborn he is, so she didn¡¯t attempt to fight with him. ¡°Alright, so you sweep while I go make breakfast, okay?¡± Xia Mu looks at her and nods. _______________________________________________________________ She rubs her eyes and walk towards the kitchen, opening the refrigerator and looking at the food stored inside. There are noodles, rice, eggs, mixed vegetables, canned beef, and ham. She ponders for awhile to see what she should make, then starts to scoop some rice out. She washes them, drains the water, and puts it in the rice cooker to cook. Then she takes out several eggs and starts to fry them into sunny side up. Xia Mu, who is in the living room, stops with what he¡¯s doing and looks at her, the dark pupils reflecting her face; reflecting when she lowers her head, when she coughs from the fumes, when she flips the spatula. The morning light shines into the warm apartment, and as Shu Yawang is busy cooking in the kitchen, Xia Mu is already walking towards the kitchen area, leaning his side against the wall. He looks at her silently, the corner of his lip lifting up slightly, displaying his faint blissfulness. Shu Yawang turns her body as she looks at him strangely. ¡°What are you doing standing here and watching me?¡± He didn¡¯t reply back, so she extends her arm to push him sightly. ¡°Don¡¯t come near here, I don¡¯t want you to smell like fumes.¡± He didn¡¯t budge and continues to look at her. She can¡¯t help it, but to smile warmly at him. ¡°Hungry? It¡¯ll be done soon.¡± She is about to turn her body back, but Xia Mu pulls her back and closes his eyes, planting a soft kiss on the corner of her lips. She stands there in shock with her face turning red, not snapping back to reality until she smells something burning. She quickly turns her body around and flips the spatula, placing the slightly burned eggs onto a plate. She pretend to ignore his staring, but when she sees him giving her a slight smirk, she can¡¯t help it, but to squint her eyes as she flashes back a light smile. Chapter 16: A man’s tears (pt. 2) Chapter 16: A man¡¯s tears (pt. 2) The procedures for enrolling to an American school for Xia Mu is not complete yet, so Shu Yawang is thinking of finishing her work project before leaving. Since Xia Mu don¡¯t have a place to stay and Yawang can¡¯t bear to have him leave, they decide to live together. Xia Mu will drop Yawang off to work and pick her up every day, and as they part, both of their eyes show reluctance to say good-bye. Sometimes, they will turn their heads and smile at each other. When they return to their home, it¡¯s their own warm space. They often lie on the couch, conversing as they watch TV with cups in their hands. Shu Yawang is the one who often cooks, and she will always cook so much that it fills up the whole table, feeling satisfied seeing Xia Mu eating everything. Every night, she will give him a good-night kiss and every morning, Xia Mu will gently wake Yawang up, repeating the cycle. Yawang often sits on the big office chair in the study, talking to Xia Mu about her design with a bright smile on her face. There will be a row of willow trees beside the lake and an octagonal pavilion. The center of the park will be a green lawn and there will be a playground being built at the south side of the park. At the north side, there will be an elegant water fountain and there will be a bird cage not far from the fountain. There will be many white doves inside the bird cage, and as people walk by, the white doves will fly about, making their white feathers look like angel wings. Every time Yawang talks about her design, her eyes will brighten, making her look like that cute girl she was before. One time, Yawang is sitting on the office chair and asks a question to Xia Mu with a big smile. ¡°Xia Mu, what kind of flower do you like?¡± Xia Mu puts down the book he is reading and thinks for awhile. ¡°Peach blossoms.¡± ¡°Peach blossoms?¡± Yawang knit her eyebrows. ¡°But it¡¯s an almond blossom park!¡± She said in a slight upset tone. Xia Mu don¡¯t like seeing her upset, so he smiles back at her. ¡°I like almond blossoms too.¡± She looks at the computer monitor and ponders for a bit, then her eyes brighten, like she got an idea. She kisses Xia Mu¡¯s cheek and displays a mysterious smile. ¡°Wait until the park is done with its construction, you have to go then!¡± ¡°Okay.¡± ¡°It will definitely surprise you!¡± Xia Mu looks at her bright eyes and cheerful smile, his love for her suddenly pouring out from his heart. He bends down and kisses her soft lips, surprising her and making her freeze in position. Her eyelashes flutter as she feels her lips burning and her face turning red. Xia Mu¡¯s eyes seem to be smiling, he closes his eyes and slowly deepens the kiss. After a while, his lips depart from hers. She glances down to the floor, too embarrassed to look at him. The corner of her eyes reveals shyness, and that makes the corners of his lips lift up. He hugs her tightly, speaking to her with a nice voice. ¡°By then, let¡¯s go see it together.¡± Shu Yawang feels her face flush and she nods her head. Xia Mu purses his lips, displaying a faint smile, then hugs her tightly again. They both hug each other without saying a word, without moving an inch. Yawang opens her eyes and rests in Xia Mu¡¯s embrace peacefully, holding onto him lightly. ¡°Xia Mu¡­¡± She suddenly blurts out. ¡°Hmm?¡± Yawang opens her mouth, wanting to ask him. Xia Mu, are you happy? Being together with me, do you feel happy? But at the end, she bites onto her lips and decide not to ask. ¡°I just want to say your name.¡± She laughs softly. ¡°Okay.¡± He answers back. She laughs out loud, Xia Mu is still like this, he haven¡¯t changed at all. He will always say okay, okay, don¡¯t like to say more than a word. But because of this cold and indifferent young adult, she always want him to have his happiness. To spend the rest of their lives peacefully, a peaceful life, simple and calm, maybe Xia Mu thinks that if they can spend their lives like that, it¡¯s happiness. _______________________________________________________________ However, one day when Xia Mu goes help Shu Yawang find the information of the location that she forgot to bring, he discovers a cardboard box in a drawer in the study. The box¡¯s appearance looks old and shabby, and Xia Mu didn¡¯t give a second thought before opening it. It¡¯s a box full of letters, and none of the envelopes were opened. He looks through them; the same envelopes, the same handwriting, the same person. He closes the box and turns his head away angrily, feeling his heart sinking. He wants to put the box back, but he couldn¡¯t help himself to pick up an envelope. He look at the words, a familiar handwriting. He remembered Shu Yawang would go downstairs to the mailbox first thing every morning, and there would always be mail for her. She would get them out with a smile on her face, carrying the mail and jumping up and down as she goes back upstairs to her room. She would read the letters over and over again until she finally puts them back. That time, she also had a box, it was a pretty pink box. She would mark his letters by numbers and carefully store them into the box. If she have nothing to do, she will take out the letters and count them. Xia Mu would stand outside the door and look at her counting the letters. That time, she was very far away from him. Her smile, her twinkling eyes, and her heart all left far away through the letters to the boy named Tang Xiao Tian. Xia Mu sits down and takes out all of the letters, counting them one by one. The letters fall down to the table, just like how he¡¯s feeling right now. During this time, Yuan Zhu enters the apartment and sees that the door to the study is not closed, so she walks right in and sees Xia Mu, greeting him with a warm smile. ¡°Xia Mu, you¡¯re home?¡± She walks closer and notices the box Xia Mu is holding. ¡°Oh! Those letters¡­¡± Xia Mu puts down the letters and turns his head to look at her. ¡°What about them?¡± Yuan Zhu gives a slight pout and looks at the letters in confusion. ¡°Before you came, Yawang asked me to get rid of them. That¡¯s strange, I was sure that I threw them out in the garbage downstairs. How did they came back?¡± Xia Mu¡¯s body suddenly shakes in anger, his eyes starting to water as he stares at her blankly. ¡°Were you counting them? There¡¯s no need, there were 1089 letters, Yawang counted them almost every single day. She only counts them, but doesn¡¯t reads them, such a strange person¡­¡± Yuan Zhu lowers her head and starts to fix up the pile of letters on the table, but she feels something is wrong, so she raise her head back up and look at Xia Mu. He looks like he fell into the depths of despair, looking like he¡¯s about to cry. She takes a step back in bewilderment. ¡°Xia Mu, are you okay?¡± She asks cautiously. He didn¡¯t answer back and she looks at him in guilt, like she said something wrong¡­ ¡°If there¡¯s nothing, then I¡¯ll leave now.¡± She walks to her room and grab her belongings, exiting the apartment in panic. _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang have been waiting for Xia Mu in the office the whole day, but he didn¡¯t show up. She feels uneasy and decides to call him, but he didn¡¯t pick up. She is worried that something happened to him, so she quickly request to leave work early and runs back home. When she opens the door, she sees Xia Mu sitting in the study, feeling relieved to see him there. ¡°What happened? You didn¡¯t come or listened to your phone, making me worried to death.¡± She knits her eyebrows in frustration. Xia Mu have his head down, not saying a word. Yawang think it¡¯s strange and takes a step forward. ¡°Xia Mu?¡± Then, she notices the letters on the table and starts to put them back. ¡°That, these are¡­.these are¡­I¡¯m planning to throw them out.¡± She tries to explain in a panicked tone. ¡°You threw them out then secretly picked them back?¡± She stops what she¡¯s doing and bites onto her lips, then gives him a foolish smile. ¡°What are you talking about?¡± ¡°You still love Tang Xiao Tian, Shu Yawang is still in love with Tang Xiao Tian.¡± He tells her in a sad tone. ¡°No¡­.no. I, I¡­like you.¡± She looks at him hard. ¡°You¡¯re lying!¡± He looks at her in the eye, each and every of his words carrying pain. ¡°You love Tang Xiao Tian, you will love him forever, you will only love him! I know, the Shu Yawang who don¡¯t love Tang Xiao Tian, cannot be Shu Yawang.¡± ¡°Xia Mu!¡± She yells out his name, tears streaming down her face. She steps forward and holds onto his hand tightly. ¡°Xia Mu, I like you, I really like you. I want to be with you, I want to give you happiness.¡± ¡°Then, Yawang, what about your happiness?¡± He asks her softly, looking at her. ¡°Can I give you happiness?¡± ¡°You can!¡± She looks at him with a stubborn face. ¡°You can.¡± Xia Mu didn¡¯t say anything, he knits his eyebrows and displays a sad expression. ¡°Xia Mu¡­¡± She calls him anxiously, clutching to both of his arms. ¡°Enough, enough of this. We already gone through so much to be together right? Weren¡¯t these past few days happy? Aren¡¯t we happy? Why are you being like this? You don¡¯t believe me? I really want to be with you!¡± She starts to cry, and Xia Mu walk towards her to give her a hug. ¡°Don¡¯t cry, don¡¯t cry Yawang. I know, we¡¯re together, we¡¯re together.¡± Yawang hugs him back tightly, continues to cry in his embrace. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, I¡¯m sorry, don¡¯t be mad at me. I will throw them out, this time, I will definitely throw them out.¡± He didn¡¯t reply back. He knows that even if she is able to throw out the box, will she be able to throw out the person in her heart? Will she be able to? Being with him reluctantly, is she really happy? _______________________________________________________________ The next day, while Shu Yawang is still in a deep sleep, Xia Mu left, and the kissing fish necklace that Yawang always wear also disappeared. She searches for him frantically, then discovers a letter placed on top of the table. Let love be free. ¨CXia Mu ¡°Why did you leave? Why won¡¯t you believe me? Why?¡± She repeats herself as she holds onto the letter, slumping herself to the floor. This time, she didn¡¯t cry. She¡¯s not going to cry, she will never cry, because the boy who told her that he wants to kill someone whenever she cries, left. When Yuan Zhu returns home, Yawang is sitting in the corner of the living room. Even when she walks past her, Yuan Zhu didn¡¯t notice her. It¡¯s not until Yuan Zhu comes out of her room from getting her belongings that she finally notices her. She pats onto her chest from the scare. ¡°What are you doing? Sitting there like a ghost, you want to scare someone to death?¡± Her eyes glance around the apartment in suspicion. ¡°Where¡¯s Xia Mu?¡± Shu Yawang turns silent first, then speaks up. ¡°He left.¡± ¡°Left? Why?¡± ¡°He said he wants me to be free.¡± She closes her eyes, grabbing onto her hair with her fists. ¡°Freedom? What is freedom? I don¡¯t need him to set me free.¡± Yuan Zhu heaves out a sigh and crouches down to Yawang¡¯s side. ¡°Yawang, is it because you feel guilty, you want to compensate Xia Mu, so you¡¯re together with him?¡± ¡°I¡­¡± ¡°Don¡¯t deny it so quickly, take your time to think about it. Do you truly love Xia Mu? Love him more than Tang Xiao Tian?¡± Yawang closes her eyes and knits her eyebrows. ¡°Yawang, if you don¡¯t love him enough, you should let him go. You should set him free.¡± Yawang stares at Yuan Zhu blankly, her disheveled, long hair falling down to her face. ¡°Don¡¯t you think that Xia Mu deserves a sincere and complete love?¡± ¡°Yes, he deserves it.¡± She replied, her tears slowly falling down. ¡°He was supposed to have a bright future, a dreamlike love, a warm family, a perfect life¡­¡± ¡°Yawang¡­¡± ¡°I know I should let him go, but¡­¡± She lowers her head. ¡°But, but I love him. Why won¡¯t you guys believe me?¡± ¡°I really love him, I really want to be together with him. I want to see him the first thing in the morning when I wake up, I want to say good-night to him every night. I want to give him a warm family, I want to give him happiness¡­I love Xia Mu! I really love him¡­¡± How can she not love him? From the moment she sees him standing with a gun, from the moment he saves her out from the ambulance, from the moment he tells her to abort the baby, her heart starts to get infiltrated with his love. She don¡¯t even know when she fell in love with him. Yes, she feels guilty, but how can she not be? She wasted six years of his life. Yes, she wants to compensate him, but there are thousands of other ways to compensate him, but she chooses to be with him. If she don¡¯t love him, she will certainly not make that decision, because she knows, Xia Mu is a prideful person, he will not accept a love based on guilt. She can¡¯t forget Tang Xiao Tian, he is an important person to her, she really can¡¯t forget him. But the feeling of love for him slowly diminishes, maybe after some time, she will be able to forget him and be able to face him. It¡¯s her fault, she didn¡¯t express herself well enough, she have done something that causes a misunderstanding, she deserves it. ¡°Then go find him! Make it clear to him!¡± ¡°He won¡¯t believe in it, he don¡¯t believe me.¡± ¡°Then tell him until he believes it! Yawang, didn¡¯t you say you want to give him happiness? Then go!¡± Shu Yawang lifts up her head. ¡°You¡¯re right! I should go find him, go make things clear, and not have him secretly leave again. No matter where he goes, I¡¯ll follow him.¡± ¡°Good luck! I support you!¡± Yuan Zhu raises her fists, giving Yawang her support. Yawang calls Uncle Cheng, begging him to tell her where Xia Mu is. At first, Uncle Cheng is unwilling to, but after Yawang keeps on begging him, he finally tells her. Xia Mu is now currently staying in a five star hotel in W City, and will take the 10am flight the next morning to America. Yawang hangs up the call and wears her jacket before bolting out of the apartment. She is certain, this time, she will not hesitate. She will hold onto his hand tightly and look at him, telling him ¡°I love you.¡± until he believes in it. Chapter 17: In this life, you don’t come, i won’t grow old Chapter 17: In this life, you don¡¯t come, i won¡¯t grow old Sometimes, when you miss something, it¡¯s for life. Will you encounter it in your next lifetime? _______________________________________________________________ In the evening, the neon lights shine across the city and it feels a little chilly. Xia Mu is standing on a sky bridge, looking down at the cars passing below the bridge as he drinks his beer. He likes this; standing under the neon lights alone and watching the busy streets, he thinks it¡¯s peaceful, the peacefulness is like time stopping in place. He raises his hand and takes a sip of his beer, tasting a slight bitterness. He had left her for an hour, he thought to himself, if she woke up then, he wouldn¡¯t have left. As he turned his body around, he hoped that she will open her eyes and call for him, telling him to stay. It turns out that he¡¯s not a clear-cut person. He laughs bitterly and takes another sip of his beer, knitting his eyebrows. He¡¯s too greedy; he remembered when he was young, he was content that she was by his side, being able to see her every day. But now? He keeps thinking of wanting more; the warm smile, the sweet kiss, those cannot satisfy him. He wants her heart, her soul, he wants her to be completely his. He knows that it¡¯s impossible, but he insists. He slants down his gaze and gulps down the last bit of the beer, clenching the can, making popping sounds from it. He straightens his body and walks down the sky bridge, throwing the empty can into the trash can and stuffing his hands into his pockets, lowering his head as he walks forward. The night wind blows away his drunken state, he is conscious, but he wish he isn¡¯t. Not far from him is a high-class bar with colorful lights that attracted him. He didn¡¯t give a second thought as he turns a corner and walks inside. The lights in the bar brings a lovey-dovey atmosphere; men and women are paired off in twos or threes by the tables. Xia Mu picks a seat in a corner to sit down and orders a few cans of beer. Not far from him seats a table of two men and three women, and as Xia Mu enters the bar, he captures all of the women¡¯s attention. The man besides one of the women looks displeased as he nudges her. ¡°What are you looking at?¡± ¡°That man is handsome.¡± ¡°Which one?¡± He glance at the direction she¡¯s gazing at and quickly turns back. ¡°Huh, he¡¯s just a pretty boy.¡± The woman continues to gaze at him as she speaks, ¡°If he¡¯s a pretty boy, I¡¯ll be willing to spend my entire fortune on him!¡± The other man beside her turns his head as he laugh, curious to see what kind of man he is, to be able to have women spending their entire fortune after taking one glance of him. But as he is able to see clearly, his smile suddenly turns stiff and he dips his head down, the lenses of his rimless eyeglasses reflecting white light, making it unable to see his expression. He clenches both of his fists and stand up, his body exuding a cold and terrifying aura. He stuffs one hand into his pant pocket and takes out his phone, turning his head again to look at Xia Mu before disappearing into the dark. After Xia Mu finishes his few cans of beer, he stays seated in for awhile. When the bar starts to play rock music, he knits his eyebrows and walks out. _______________________________________________________________ It¡¯s already midnight by the time he walks out of the bar, the bustling city turning silent with no pedestrians on the streets. After walking a few steps, Xia Mu feels a burst of cold wind attacking him from behind. He extends his arm to block the attack, hearing a cracking sound. It¡¯s the sound of a metal rod hitting against his bones, and Xia Mu can feel an immense pain from it. He don¡¯t have a chance to react when a flash of silver light passes by. He holds onto his arm and narrowly escapes the blow, stumbling two steps back. He looks at the scene before him, a group of four men holding onto metal rods surrounding him in the center, inching closer to him. In a corner not far away, a man wearing a suit is holding onto a lighted cigarette, walking towards them gracefully with his lips curving into an evil smile. ¡°Xia Mu, let¡¯s settle our past issues today.¡± Xia Mu stands in the center and looks back at him coldly. ¡°Qu Wei Ran, you¡¯re not dead.¡± Qu Wei Ran shakes his finger. ¡°How can I be dead when you¡¯re not dead yet?¡± He will forever remember the pain Xia Mu have brought to him! He wants to have his revenge so bad, how he had made him paralyzed before, he¡¯ll do the same back to him. Qu Wei Ran laughs coldly as he drops the cigarette to the floor and stepping onto it. ¡°Make him crippled.¡± The four men raise their metal rods as they heard the order and lunge towards Xia Mu. Within a flash, Xia Mu gets hit several times with the rods, fresh blood spilling out from his mouth and the immense pain causing him to stifle out a sound. A metal rod strikes across his chest, and he spits out another mouthful of blood. Another metal rod hits his head, and his vision turns blurry as he bends halfway down from the blow. Blood is flowing down his eyes, making the world look bloody red. He opens his eyes and looks at Qu Wei Ran whose far away. Qu Wei Ran is looking at him with a cold smile, his eye expression showing that he¡¯s enjoying this. ¡°Enjoy, Xia Mu. From tomorrow on, you will also be a crippled person.¡± Another rod hits Xia Mu, and he coughs out a mouthful of blood. Suddenly, he extends his arm and snatches a metal rod! He breaks out from the four men and lunges towards Qu Wei Ran! The other three men who still have their metal rods chase after him and strikes the rod against his thin back. One of the men see that he won¡¯t be able to catch up to him, so he throws the metal rods towards Xia Mu¡¯s direction. The rod hits his head, causing Xia Mu to stumble forward, blood streaming down on one side of his head. But he didn¡¯t stop, he looks like a beast who¡¯s been cornered as he slashes out his claws and lunges angrily towards Qu Wei Ran. Qu Wei Ran starts to panic, leaving behind the gentleman mask he¡¯s been wearing as he backs away. Xia Mu slashes his metal rod at him, and Qu Wei Ran turns his body to run away. But after running a couple of steps, a flash of light shoots by, followed by a screeching brake sound and a crashing sound. Qu Wei Ran felt that his body was flying, and Xia Mu stops chasing as he looks at Qu Wei Ran coldly. When the four men sees the scene before them, they quickly drop their metal rods and run away in panic. _______________________________________________________________ Xia Mu¡¯s forehead continues to bleed profusely as he is holding onto the metal rod and looking down at the man lying on the ground whose gasping for air. This is the second time, the second time Xia Mu watches him die. But like the first time, he doesn¡¯t regret it, not even one bit. Qu Wei Ran looks back at Xia Mu, having difficulty to breathe. This is the second time he¡¯s dying from his hands. He remembered the first time, it was when he was holding a meeting, but he don¡¯t remember what¡¯s the content they were discussing. He smiled at the people who were trying to please him in despise, yes, in despise. If his father¡¯s first son hadn¡¯t passed away, when will these people ever pay attention to him? When they sided with the first wife¡¯s son son to bully him, would they ever had thought that one day, he will be the successor to the company? He raises the corners of his lips into a smile, smiling joyfully. All the people in the conference room had their heads down, not daring to make a sound. As Qu Wei Ran was arguing with a company veteran, a boy with a murderous look opened the conference room door. He can recognize him within a glance, because he has such an unforgettable face. The boy¡¯s eye expression is ferocious, like he¡¯s ready to pounce and tear him in pieces! But he¡¯s not afraid, he actually thinks it¡¯s interesting. He likes this, likes it when people have a lot of hatred towards him. As the boy storm towards him, he prepares to ridicule him, asking him if he really wants to kill him that bad. He even thought about if he needs to fight back, he just need to throw in two punches, it shouldn¡¯t hurt, won¡¯t even itch. But he didn¡¯t thought that boy wouldn¡¯t give him a chance to speak when he raises his arm with a gun in his hand, the black hole staring right at him. His eye expression then was the same as it is now, an eye expression of a beast; cold, cruel, wanting him to die. As the bullet passed through his body, he didn¡¯t think it was painful, it¡¯s just that he never thought, never had thought that he would fire a gun without thinking twice. That time, he didn¡¯t die from his hands, but he didn¡¯t think, that today¡­and suddenly, he laughs, laughing bitterly. ¡°It seems¡­that I¡¯m¡­destined¡­.to die¡­in your hands¡­.hehehehe¡­¡± Qu Wei Ran laughs as he slowly closes his eyes. In fact, he¡¯s not afraid of dying, he¡¯s just afraid that after he dies, no one will cry for him. He heard, that as people die, their happiest moment of their lives will play right in front of their eyes. But why, when he closes his eyes, he can¡¯t see anything? Why? Why can¡¯t he see anything? _______________________________________________________________ Xia Mu, who is still standing, looks at Qu Wei Ran coldly, looking at him until he closes his eyes, until he stops breathing, before he turns his heels and walk away. He loosens his hold to the metal rod and lets it slips out, having it fall to the ground. Blood keeps on flowing down his forehead as he staggers forward. He suddenly wants to see her, wants to go back to her side, he needs to go back to her side, go back, he¡¯s inseparable from her. He falters forward and suddenly falls down to the ground, his mouth continuing to vomit out blood, his handsome face covered with blood. His arms and legs start to twitch and he struggles to stand back up, but he falls right back down. His cold, empty eyes are becoming wider, and it¡¯s more difficult for him to breathe. Gradually, he stops moving, his gaze turning blank and his pupils enlarging. He¡¯s like a dying fish struggling to survive, his mouth opening and closing with blood mixed with his saliva as he mouths, ¡°Yawang, Yawang, Yawang¡­¡± His voice slowly weakens and he closes his eyes gently. Right before him plays a black and white movie, with scenes playing in front of him one by one. That familiar military compound, the twenty-minute ride to school, that radiant, sunny day, that three-story villa, that first encounter, that person who he loved deeply. He feels that he¡¯s going back to that summer, to that first encounter. He holds onto the ancient railings as he walks down the stairs. She hears him and lifts her head up, looking at him with the corners of her lips lift up. She smiles softly at him, so elegant and graceful. He smiles back, slowly lifting the corners of his lips, looking back at her with a smile. She said: ¡°Hello, my name is Shu Yawang. You can call me Yawang jiejie.¡± That was the first sentence she said to him, but he never called her jiejie, he never did¡­ _______________________________________________________________ It¡¯s late in the evening, in a quiet city where one can see blood everywhere under the dim lights, creating a shocking scene. Not far away from the incident, in a five-star hotel, a woman with a determined look on her face stands firmly in the lobby, waiting for him to come back, waiting for him to stand in front of her. She will hug him tightly and tell him, ¡°Xia Mu, I love you, I really love you. I¡¯m not pretending, I¡¯m not forcing this, I just love you.¡± She thinks that when she tells him that, he will definitely smile. That precious and warm smile, she will definitely see it again. The lobby door opens and close, opens and close, the unfamiliar faces walking past her. She starts to turn anxious and walks out of the hotel to look around. Two ambulances drives by, their wailing sirens making her heart feel uneasy. She narrows her eyebrows and suddenly turns worried. The memory when she was twenty-two years old that she keeps on suppressing in her mind comes out. Her body starts to tremble uncontrollably, so she takes a couple of deep breaths, telling herself to not have any crazy thoughts, it¡¯s alright, it¡¯s alright. She paced back and forth restlessly in the hotel, looking at the distant road closely. She keeps on waiting and waiting, waiting until the horizon starts to show a hint of grey when she finally receives an answer. It is a phone call, from an unknown number. She looks at the vibrating phone, she don¡¯t know why, but she¡¯s afraid to answer the call. However at the end, she picks up the call. The voice from the other end sounds cold, and the words they tell her are horrifying. ¡°Hello, this is the W City People¡¯s Hospital calling. Your friend Xia Mu was sent to our hospital at 1AM for medical treatment, but because his head has been hit with hard objects repeatedly, we were unsuccessful in saving him. We declared his time of death to be 4:16AM.¡± Shu Yawang holds onto her phone as she listens with a blank expression. She didn¡¯t give any reaction, just holding onto the same pose of holding onto her phone. She didn¡¯t cry, didn¡¯t fuss about. She didn¡¯t hear it, didn¡¯t hear anything. She must be too tired from waiting and this is all a dream, a dream where a crazy person called her and said Xia Mu died. How can Xia Mu die? She have so many things to tell him, so much to say. She wants to give the first biggest happiness to him, give him the second biggest happiness, she wants to give him everything. She will love him like how he loves her. ¡°Miss Shu, please come over to the hospital, there¡¯s still some paperwork¡­¡± She frantically hangs up the call and takes out the battery of her phone. She don¡¯t want to hear it, she don¡¯t believe it! She runs back home and closes the door of her room, refusing to accept any phone calls. She ignores the knocking on the door, she don¡¯t want to hear anyone talking about Xia Mu! Yuan Zhu shakes her shoulder, telling her calm down, telling her to face reality, telling her if she wants to cry, just cry. Shu Yawang screams at her, telling her to get out. She don¡¯t want to hear it, she don¡¯t want to calm down, don¡¯t want to be strong, don¡¯t want to cry! Xia Mu is not dead! Not dead, not dead, not dead! But even if she don¡¯t want to hear it, don¡¯t want to believe in it, facts will be facts. Xia Mu is dead, really dead. He¡¯s lying in the cold morgue, his body covered with scars. _______________________________________________________________ Two days later, Shu Yawang¡¯s father pulls her out of her apartment in W City to see Xia Mu for the last time. She screams and resists; she don¡¯t want to go, she will not go, she won¡¯t go anywhere. She will stay at her home, the place where they had their happiest moments together. If she stays here, he will come back. She don¡¯t believe that Xia Mu is dead, will not believe it! He¡¯s just angry at her, he left and went to America. He will come back, it¡¯s because she¡¯s here, so he¡¯ll come back. He loves her, he¡¯s inseparable from her, like how she¡¯s inseparable from him. Her father slaps her across her face, tears streaming down his face as he yells at her. ¡°How can you not go and see the child? How will he be able to rest in peace?!¡± Shu Yawang cups her cheek with her hand, kneeling down to the floor and sitting there silently. Her face is expressionless; she bites onto her lips as her body trembles slightly. Her tears are like the waterfall, pouring down her face. She can¡¯t take it anymore and cries out loud on the floor. Shu Yawang leans onto her father as he brings her to the hospital morgue, where she can see Xia Mu again. She continues to cry as she staggers forward, bending her waist slightly so she can see him closely. The child who rarely smiled in his life, was carrying a beautiful smile onto his lips as he died. He looks like he¡¯s sleeping, having a beautiful dream, a dream where he experienced his happiest moments. The dream consists of the one he loved, he stayed there, not willing to wake up. She raises her hand and strokes at the scars on his face gently, then rubs her finger onto his smile. She looks at him without saying a word, but the tears keep rolling down. She sees the kissing fish necklace around his neck, and can¡¯t hold back when she whimpers softly. She extends her hands and removes the necklace, removing the fish and holding onto it firmly inside her palm. Then she helps him wear the necklace back, her tears falling down rapidly. She looks at the fish in her palm and said, ¡°Xia Mu, I will wear it well. I will keep on wearing it, wearing it until I grow old, wearing it into my coffin, wearing it in my next life.¡± ¡°You have to wear it too, keep on wearing it, wearing it in your next life. We will definitely meet in our next lives. By then, I will wait for you. By then, if you don¡¯t come, I won¡¯t grow old. By then, you cannot lose me.¡± She holds onto his hand, wrapping her pinky finger around his. She looks at him and cries, ¡°It¡¯s a promise, it¡¯s a promise okay?¡± In the cold morgue, a woman is wrapping her pinky around a finger that has lost its warmth. She cries softly, as if she¡¯s wrapped with never-ending grief. _______________________________________________________________ Two days later, Xia Mu¡¯s funeral is being held in S City. That day, the sky is very blue with a few clouds, it¡¯s nice weather. That day, not many people attend since Xia Mu don¡¯t have much close friends. That day, everyone have their heads down, sobbing in silence. That day, Shu Yawang stands in front of the tombstone for a very long time, even after everyone left, after God opened his eyes and let down a light rain shower. She stands in the rain, looking at the boy on the tombstone with a blank stare. After a while, she realizes someone is holding onto an umbrella behind her. She turns her head and sees Tang Xiao Tian by her side, standing quietly with her. She turns her head back and asks him, ¡°You also came?¡± Tang Xiao Tian looks at the tombstone, the corners of his eyes turning slightly red. ¡°I came to send him off.¡± She nods her head slightly. ¡°Xia Mu will be happy. He didn¡¯t like you before because I liked you, now he¡¯s the one I love, so he wouldn¡¯t hate you.¡± He gives a wry smile, bending down his waist and placing a bouquet of fresh flowers in front of Xia Mu¡¯s picture. The raindrops hit against the transparent wrapping paper, creating a dull sound. ¡°You finally succeeded in stealing Yawang away from me, are you happy?¡± He looks at the handsome boy in the photo, seeing his eyes still showing indifference. Tang Xiao Tian looks at him and suddenly dips his head down. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Xia Mu.¡± ¡°I always wanted to say I¡¯m sorry.¡± It¡¯s all his fault, if he haven¡¯t had met Qu Wei Ran, Xia Mu wouldn¡¯t have died and Yawang wouldn¡¯t have to deal with so much pain. Even Qu Wei Ran, he wouldn¡¯t have died either. Shu Yawang looks at his back, placing her hand on top of his shoulder, patting it gently. She wants to say something, but at the end, she didn¡¯t say it. After a while, as the sky starts to darken, he stands up and asks her, ¡°What are your future plans?¡± ¡°I¡¯m going to America to take care of Grandpa.¡± She answers with her head down. ¡°For how long?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± She shakes her head, then lifts her head up to smile at him. ¡°You¡¯re not going to wait for me, right?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not going to wait for you, because I know, you won¡¯t be coming back.¡± He understands her too well, her heart is already far away from him, she will never go back to his side. ¡°Okay.¡± Tang Xiao Tian rubs the crown of her head. ¡°Yawang, be strong.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t worry, I will.¡± She replies back with a nod. ¡°Then¡­¡± He pauses momentarily. ¡°I¡¯ll leave now.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± Tang Xiao Tian hands his umbrella to her. She receives it and he turns his body away, quickly leaving the cemetery. This time, he didn¡¯t turn his head back, and neither did she. _______________________________________________________________ Time flashes by, and it¡¯s already been five years. Shu Yawang walks out of the international airport and Uncle Cheng kindly helps her open the car door, letting her sit inside the car. ¡°Yawang, is the Commander¡¯s body well?¡± ¡°Uh huh, Grandpa¡¯s body is very strong.¡± ¡°Oh, that¡¯s good then.¡± Uncle Cheng smiles with assurance. He continues to ask her questions and she answers all of them one by one. He tells her the events that happened in the military compound, telling her one at a time. The sunlight shines right at the kissing fish necklace around her neck, dazzling very brightly. Yawang ,who have been silent afterwards, suddenly speaks up. ¡°Uncle Cheng, can you drive me to the almond blossom park in W City?¡± She suddenly wants to see the park that she designed. That time, he promised her that they will see it together, but unfortunately, he won¡¯t have the chance to. As for her, she didn¡¯t went to see it either. It¡¯s now May, right at peach blossom season. Shu Yawang gets out of the car and walks into the park, looking at the blooming peach blossoms. She suddenly smiles, remembering the dialogue they exchanged years ago. She asked: ¡°What kind of flower do you like?¡± He answered: ¡°Peach blossoms.¡± ¡°Huh, but it¡¯s an almond blossom park¡­¡± She remembered that time, she was distressed over it, how can she make an almond blossom park have peach blossoms in it? Afterwards, in order to give him a surprise, in order to make him happy, she figured out a way to design it to be a peach blossom park. She strolls down the park; the park is very beautiful, just like heaven. The peach blossoms and almond blossoms cross over each other, and if a gust of wind passes by, the flower petals will fall to the ground. She strolls by the water fountain, watching the children chase after the white doves with a radiant smile on their faces. A teenage girl is holding onto a seven to eight year old boy¡¯s hand as they run past her. She can¡¯t help it but to turn her head back to look at them. The beautiful doves fly up to the sky, their angel-like white feathers falling down from above. The corner of the girl¡¯s skirt lifts up and she have a radiant smile on her face. She stops running and lifts up her palm to catch a falling feather, tickling the boy¡¯s neck with it. He covers his neck with his hand and glares at the girl. The girl laughs and continues to tickle him, and the boy raises his hand to fight back. The girl turns her body around and runs away, the two chasing each other in the central square, their simple and bright laughter spreading far away. Shu Yawang continues to stare at them, suddenly remembering when she first met Xia Mu, they were also like that. She would bully him, and he would fight back by pouncing on her and biting her. Back then, he was really cute. She turns her head back and laughs bitterly. If only one can protect the happiness of their childhood and grow up day by day from it, how wonderful would it be? The park is filled with peach blossoms, displaying their beautiful shades of color. She walks slowly along the lake, seeing an octagonal pavilion at a distance. She walks over there and lifts up her head. Sure enough, the pavilion¡¯s plague writes out: ÏÄÓÐÇÇľ£¬ÑÅÍûÌìÌà (Summer have trees, an elegant look to heaven) Yawang looks at the plague for a long time without saying a word, feeling her heart tightening up. Why? Why couldn¡¯t he have come and take a look at the heaven she designed for him? Why couldn¡¯t he have accompanied her and take a look¡­just one look, and he would have understand that she really loves him, really, really loves him. Like what she had said, she really wants to be with him. Why couldn¡¯t he take a look? This beautiful heaven, without him, how can it be considered as heaven? ¡°Yawang.¡± Among the beautiful peach blossoms, it seems like Xia Mu¡¯s clear and cold voice is calling out to her. She turns her head around and look, thinking she sees him standing among the beautiful flowers, looking back at her with a smile, like how he did before. Her nose prickles and tears start to slide down her face. ¡°Yawang, what¡¯s wrong?¡± Uncle Cheng steps forward and asks nervously. She bites onto her lips and replies back. ¡°I don¡¯t know why, but I suddenly missed him.¡± If only that year, she can see things clearly, if he was willing to believe her then, if he didn¡¯t have left¡­but, at the end, there are no ¡°if only¡±¡­Sometimes, when you miss something, it¡¯s for life. Will you encounter it in your next lifetime? Special Episode 1: Tang Xiao Tian- until the end of one’s life Special Episode 1: Tang Xiao Tian- until the end of one¡¯s life I used ten years¡¯ time to forget a person, but at the end, she remained even more vivid in my mind. _______________________________________________________________ I remembered that year, Zhang Jing Yu called me frantically, telling me that Xia Mu died. I held onto the phone and stayed silent for a long time; sadness filling my heart, my nose starting to prickle, and tears are about to fall down. Suddenly, the scene where I first met Xia Mu appeared before my eyes. That child, he owned a pair of cold and slightly gloomy eyes and an exquisite, perfect face. That child, it was like he was not blessed from the heavens. His life was so short, so tragic, yet, it was so beautiful. It was like fireworks in the dark night sky, blooming beautifully. People don¡¯t have enough time to react to this wonder when, within a flash, he was gone. He left, and he also took her with him. When I saw her kneeling in front of the tombstone in the cemetery, her slender fingers are stroking onto his picture gently, each and every inch, each and every strand. Her tears keep on falling down her cheek as she said, ¡°Xia Mu, in our next life, we have to be together.¡± I stood behind her in silence, clasping my hands together. I don¡¯t know when, but the sky suddenly started to pour down a light rain shower. I opened an umbrella and shielded her from the rain. At the end, was that all I can do for her? She lifted her head up and looked at me, her exhausted face hurting my heart. I really wanted to hug her, like how I did before, hugging her tightly. I extended my arm, but I just rubbed onto the crown of her head gently. ¡°Yawang, be well. Be strong.¡± She nodded her head. ¡°Then¡­.I¡¯ll leave now.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± This time, I didn¡¯t turn my head. I told myself; don¡¯t look back, don¡¯t stay, don¡¯t make her uncomfortable, don¡¯t hurt her even more. Maybe one day, she will forget the pain. Maybe one day, she will come back. Maybe one day¡­there won¡¯t be that one day. I know, there will never that be day. So I told her that I won¡¯t wait for her. As I told her that, something fell out from the corner of my eye. Why, why can¡¯t she have her happiness? Why did Xia Mu die? Why? Xia Mu, you despicable child! You won! You won this lifetime and the next lifetime! You won over my Yawang! Why couldn¡¯t you treat her well? You bad child! Why couldn¡¯t you give her happiness? At the road below the mountains, I slowly crouched down to the ground, grabbing onto my hair in agony. Yawang¡­Yawang¡­I turned my head around, looking up to the kneeling shadow at the mountain top, my heart about to be broken with the pain. _______________________________________________________________ After a few years, I started to go down my own path; going to school, going to work, dealing with all sorts of pressure in a place far away from home. I told myself, even the most perfect love will fade in time, I will be able to forget her, I want to forget her. But it¡¯s been ten years¡­her shadow, why does it appear so vividly in my dreams? Why do I always dream of her holding onto little Xia Mu¡¯s hand and smiling at me as she walks towards me? That day, I went to the almond blossom park that she designed. After I saw the plaque, I turned my head away and laughed. I walked to the central square and watched the white doves flying about, their angel-like white feathers falling down to the ground. I suddenly remembered her dream; she said she wanted to create a park that¡¯s like heaven. She said, if I¡¯m there, it¡¯s considered heaven. I lowered my head and chuckled, why has it been so many years that I can still clearly remember her words and her smile? Above me was the clear June blue sky and the warm sun and I sat myself down on a park bench as I made a bet with myself to see how many years it will take for me to forget her. Maybe it will be tomorrow, maybe the day after tomorrow, maybe longer. Or maybe it¡¯s the moment when I leave this world. Special Episode 2: Do you still remember that child? Special Episode 2: Do you still remember that child? Do you still remember that child? The child who always like to sit in the corner, the child who grew up living in a military compound, the child with a tragic life, the child who¡¯s as beautiful as a doll, do you still remember him? He would always wear a blue plaid shirt, dipping his head down in silence, his beautiful side profile making people unable to move their eyes away. As he looked at you, those empty eyes, that impassive expression, those deep dark circles, did those made him unforgettable? I ruined the most beautiful child¡¯s life. Meeting me, maybe that was his life¡¯s biggest catastrophe. _______________________________________________________________ Shu Yawang I can never forget that boy. I remembered the first time I saw him, he looked like a doll; so beautiful and cold with a lifeless expression. At that time, I never thought that our tie would be so deep, and I would not believe afterwards that I would owe him so much. I always thought that I was taking care of him, protecting him. I always thought that he was my most quiet, most beautiful younger brother. I always think about the things that happened when we were young, those things have already happened a long time ago, but why were they still fresh in my memories? When he was young, he liked to stay in my home. No matter when, if I was home, he would be there. From then, I always thought that he was my younger brother, my dear younger brother, the person whom I will treat well for the rest of my life. When we were young, we were always together, like siblings in a family. In the winter, we would sit by the windows, squinting our eyes as we extend our red and cold hands out to the sun. I would place an earplug in his ears as we listened to the CD player, but he would always shake his head and refuse, complaining that the music I listened to was too loud. Then, we would sit side by side, basking in the sun and listening to music, and sometimes we would hear the rustling of the leaves nearby. In the spring, we would bring Tang Xiao Tian and Zhang Jing Yu along with us to go hiking on the tallest mountain in T City. Xiao Tian was worried that I¡¯ll be tired, so he¡¯ll always reach his hand out to help me. Then, I don¡¯t know where he popped out, but Xia Mu would always hold onto my hand and not let go. Haha, that time, I really thought that this child was possessive. In the summer, I don¡¯t like to go out. I would always drag my drawing pad to his room and turned on the air conditioner to full blast, eating fruits leisurely as I draw. Then, he would sit on the floor by my side, either reading a thick book or playing with his toy models. His eye expression was focused and serious, so beautiful. Every time when I draw, I would always glance towards his side profile and stared at him blankly. He would lift his head up from my staring and looked back at me, his black pupils reflecting myself. That time, I thought I was the most happiest Shu Yawang. At that time, I owned all of the happiness; my youth, my Xia Mu; they were my heaven. The memories of my youth all contained happiness, and that happiness stayed until a devil intruded. That devil ruined me, ruined Xia Mu. I would never forget the second day after the incident. I rushed into the company to look for Qu Wei Ran, and after I pushed open the door of the conference room, I saw him covered in blood and I was shocked. As I approached closer, he lifted his hand and rubbed off, not someone else¡¯s blood off his face, but the tears on my tears. He used his bloody hand to gently wipe away the tears on my face and looked at me as he said, ¡°Yawang, don¡¯t cry. Yawang, don¡¯t cry.¡± I will forever remember these four words as my tears continue to fall down like raindrops. (Yawang is two words in Chinese) That child, that beautiful child would always make me feel touched. He would always think of me and always placed me first. He would prove it by his actions, hitting into my soul deeply. He killed someone because of me, helped me aborted the baby because of me, and surrendered himself to the police because of me. He was always there for me, he said he couldn¡¯t get his happiness, so if I had mine, he¡¯ll be happy. He was willing to do anything for me, so how can I just throw away his happiness? Grandpa Xia told me that what he most regretted doing in his life was handing Xia Mu over to me. This strong, old man, looked at me with resentment and regret on his deathbed. ¡°Shu Yawang, you ruined Xia Mu, you ruined his life.¡± Yes, I ruined Xia Mu, I ruined the most beautiful child in the world. Meeting me , maybe that was his life¡¯s biggest catastrophe. _______________________________________________________________ Tang Xiao Tian I can never forget that boy. I remembered when we were young, Zhang Jing Yu had told me, ¡°Xiao Tian-ah, be careful. That Xia Mu will become your love rival when he grows up.¡± That time, I just laughed it off, not taking his words to mind. I never thought that this silent and gloomy boy would take Yawang away from me. I knew that he liked Yawang, but all the kids in the military compound liked her. I knew that he treated her well, but whoever knew Yawang would treat her well. I knew that he would do anything for her, but I didn¡¯t think that he would kill someone for her. Yes, I underestimated him. I always thought that he was just a little boy who grew attached to the neighbor girl; a crush that will not blossomed or having any results. I never thought of him as my rival, or anyone to be my rival. I always thought that our feelings for each other would never be shaken by others. But he did it, he really did it. Since he was young, he would be using a small hoe and digging into a corner of my wall. When a storm finally hits, my solid wall will break down. Hehe, but I don¡¯t blame him, really. Losing Yawang was my fault. I, Tang Xiao Tian never resented anyone from my wrongdoing, and I never will. In fact, I really liked him, really liked this clean and silent boy. I always wanted my mother to give birth to another younger brother. When I was young, I followed my mother and would asked her countlessly, ¡°Mama, Mama, make a younger brother for me.¡± My mother would always say, ¡°If not a younger brother, how about a younger sister?¡± I tilted my head and thought about it, then refused. I just wanted a younger brother, a beautiful and brave younger brother. From then, after I¡¯ve been trained by my father, I can go train him. I can tell him to do push-ups and run around the playground, hehe. So when I first saw him with Yawang, I thought that this beautiful boy was very cute, it would be great if he was my younger brother. But this guy was reluctant to become my younger brother. No matter how I tried to get close to him, he would always have that cold and indifferent look on his face. Whenever I gave him good food, he wouldn¡¯t want it. When I wanted to teach him how to fight, he would ignore me. Alright, I admit that he rarely looked at me, and when he does, he would looked at me coldly with his gloomy eyes. This type of Xia Mu was frustrating to me, I was also considered to be the king of children, but why does he only like Yawang and not me? He really clung onto Yawang; I remembered during high school, both Yawang and I were in our first year in high school and he was on his first year of junior high. Students in the first year of junior high don¡¯t need to attend late study, so they can leave after finishing with their classes during the day. But because he wanted to go home with Yawang, he would stay in his classroom and have a self-study session until Yawang goes to pick him up. He would pack his bag and go home with Yawang. I remembered it was summer that time. Yawang would be riding her bicycle with Xia Mu sitting behind her, his eyes drooping slightly and his hair moving from the gentle breeze. His face will carry a trace of indifference but the corners of his lips would be lifted slightly. Under the dim starry sky, the bicycle wheels would keep spinning as their shadows disappeared; that scene have always been imprinted into my mind. It was not until a few years later when I thought about it and suddenly realized that he have been in love with her for so long. It turned out that his love for her was very deep. It turned out that I really lost, lost to the child under the starry sky. That beautiful child whose easily satisfied as he lifted the corners of his lips into a smile. That boy must have been my enemy from my past life, of course, he was in this life too. That child took away the woman who I loved the most, but I don¡¯t blame him. _______________________________________________________________ Qu Wei Ran I think that this boy and I had resentments throughout our lifetimes because when I first saw him, his sharp glare told me that he will become my enemy. Every time we met, he would always give me a cold warning. ¡°Don¡¯t appear in front of Yawang again!¡± ¡°I would not let you go from this!¡± But when he¡¯s like this, I become more happy. I wanted to know what would happen if I keep on appearing. So what if he won¡¯t let me go? Is that scary? Wow, such a cold glare, I¡¯m so scared! I can¡¯t help it but to laugh at him, I¡¯ve seen people like him often. Every time I have a new woman, I would meet those types of people. Every single time those people would say some harsh words to me, but at the end, they were nowhere to be found. Their women would continue to stay by my side with smiles and tears and cling onto me. I got so tired that I wanted to call them and tell them, ¡°Hey, I¡¯m giving you back your woman, she¡¯s no fun.¡± For this boy, will he give me any surprises? Because of him and Tang Xiao Tian, I was determined to have this woman, this woman named Shu Yawang. Obtaining her doesn¡¯t need much effort, just a few glasses of alcohol. Luckily, she was very fortunate by having men who wanted to protect, but also because of this, she was in this simple and unguarded accident, or rather, she was stupid. All women are actually the same, their cries are no different, even their reactions afterwards are the same. After obtaining Shu Yawang, I¡¯m not really happy, I¡¯m actually a little tired. So I would sit and look at her coldly as she cries, as she acts out, and as she vows to report me to the police. How could she report me? I smiled and helped her go into the cab, telling her maliciously that whether she¡¯s going to sue me or wants me to take responsibility, it doesn¡¯t matter. Yes, it doesn¡¯t matter. Whether she¡¯s going to disappear or really asks me to take responsibility, I¡¯m fully prepared for it. Besides, I¡¯m waiting for her tears to bring the boy with the sharp glare and my fellow comrade. That boy did not disappoint me, he really came after me. He raised his gun and asked me, ¡°Why did I bullied Yawang?¡± I laughed, how can there be so much ¡°Why¡± in this world? If I want something, I¡¯ll have it. He angrily said he will kill me. I shrugged my shoulders without a care, too many people had said that to me, yet I¡¯m still living well. I was laughing coldly in my mind, he wouldn¡¯t dare to fire his gun. Maybe that was the most incorrect judgement I ever made. He fired his gun, and as the bullet hit through my chest and my vision turned bloody, then I really believed that he would kill me because of this girl, this girl who¡¯s not even his girlfriend. It turned out that it¡¯s not just all talk, he really liked Shu Yawang. When I woke up from the coma, I saw Shu Yawang who became my wife sitting beside the bed. At first I was happy, really happy. But not because how much I love her, it was because I found my best tool for revenge. Xia Mu, I will not let you go, I will torture you to death like how you did to me. _______________________________________________________________ Xia Luo (Commander Xia) ¡°Guilty of attempted murder, sentenced to six years in prison and stripped off of political rights for life!¡± The voice in the TV sounds cold and mechanical as it echoed throughout the villa. The nanny standing nearby walked forward and asked if I wanted to change the channel. I don¡¯t have the energy to say either yes or no. The nanny looked at me helplessly with a hint of empathy before turning around and leave. Empathy? Me, a military commander of the 44th district, needed a woman to feel empathetic towards me? Empathetic for what? She sympathized that my son died early and now my only grandson is being sentenced to six years in prison? Six years! I glared at the TV screen as they reported on other news, but his news kept on echoing in my ears. The judge at the end sentenced him to six years and removal of political rights. He was only eighteen years old¡­.my grandson was only eighteen years old. I don¡¯t dare to think about what would happen to him while he was serving in prison. Even though I had made all the preparations in the prison center, there¡¯s no guarantee that he would be bullied by other prisoners or be able to take care of himself. And after six years when he gets released, what should he do? He¡¯s deprived of political rights, his life had not even began when it already came to an end. The doorbell suddenly rang and the nanny walked out and walked back in, telling me that Shu Yawang was standing outside and wanted to come in and see me. Come in? That girl had the guts to still see me? I angrily threw my cup down to the floor, yelling at the nanny to kick her out! The nanny walked out, frightened, and I slumped back onto the couch. She still had the guts to see me? She¡¯s not afraid that I might shoot her? This child, when did she start seducing my grandson? When did my grandson became inseparable from her? That girl had a boyfriend! What I regretted the most in my life was bringing her into my house! I really regretted handing my grandson over to her. She trained him to become a wild dog, a wild dog who¡¯s only loyal to her. If only I have taken care of Xia Mu myself, maybe the results would have been different? Maybe it¡¯s a punishment, because Xia Mu looked so alike to his father, so whenever I see Xia Mu, I would think of my dear son who died young. Every time I think of him, I become miserable. I can¡¯t control my feelings, but I don¡¯t want to infect Xia Mu with grief, that child already suffered enough. So I called up my men and have their kids play with him. It¡¯s that child, that child with a very clean smile, that child who would stand up straight whenever she sees me, that child who was a bit afraid of me. That girl¡­.how did I thought that she would bring Xia Mu out of the darkness when she actually drove him deeper into it! I don¡¯t understand what¡¯s so good about this girl. That girl had a boyfriend, and she knew your feelings for her, yet she was still tangled with you. A girl who casually drinks outside with no preparation, what¡¯s the point of feeling regret or frustrated when the accident already happened? The nanny came back and said that Shu Yawang refused to leave until she sees me. Refusing to leave until she sees me? Did she came to apologize? That¡¯s really funny, what¡¯s the use of apologizing now? What¡¯s the point of regretting now? Yes, I know, this is not her fault. Yes, I know that she didn¡¯t mean it. But I cannot forgive her, cannot! I told the nanny if she wants to stay, then let her stay. If she wants to act crazy, let her go crazy, she have nothing to do with my family. The nanny left and I stood up to place my hand on the railings to go upstairs. At this point, does Shu Yawang really think that I would forgive her after her apology? No! Impossible! I will never forgive this girl for the rest of my life, I never will. But Xia Mu, my only grandson, do you know how I felt when I saw your thin face when I visited you in the prison center? Grandpa¡¯s heart ached, Grandpa wished that I could take your place in prison. Xia Mu, my bright child, how can Grandpa protect you now? Xia Mu, my only grandson, my pride. Special Episode 3: Rrison Special Episode 3: Rrison I think of a girl every day and every night; I missed seeing her face, missed talking to her, missed seeing her warm smile. I kept on thinking and thinking about her, thinking about her so much that it¡¯s turning blurry. I think this is what my love is; painful, sweet, longing for, and blissful. ¨CXia Mu _______________________________________________________________ ¡°The court¡¯s verdict is Xia Mu, male, eighteen years old, shot the plaintiff Qu Wei Ran in 13A of Hyde Industrial Group building on June 2, 2004 which resulted in serious injuries. According to the , he is guilty in attempted murder. He is to be sentenced to jail for six years and have his political rights removed for life!¡± Following the ¡°ping¡± sound from the judge¡¯s gavel, he would have to say goodbye to his freedom. Six years, it¡¯s not long, but it¡¯s not short either. Xia Mu looked at the front with indifference, forcing himself to not look back, to not look back at his family who¡¯s sitting in the gallery, to not look back at her. He wanted to show that he¡¯s not afraid, that he doesn¡¯t care, so maybe, they¡¯ll feel better. Two court officers pushed him forward, his hands being handcuffed from the front. His sullen, cold, handsome face displayed a sickly pale expression. He dipped his head down as he nonchalantly passed by her. He didn¡¯t turn his head back to look at her and didn¡¯t even stop for a second, he just kept on walking. He heard her crying softly, heard her calling his name, but he couldn¡¯t stop, he couldn¡¯t look back. He felt that if he did look back, he might not hold back and cry. Now, he felt that his heart is aching, aching so much that he can¡¯t bear to take a look at her, seeing her cry, hearing her gentle voice. He¡¯s not scared of going to jail, he¡¯s really not afraid. He just, just couldn¡¯t bear to leave her, he¡¯s really reluctant to. Xia Mu gently bit his lips as the corners of his eyes started to turn red. He stood up straight and stared straight ahead, not slowing down his pace. He thought that at the end, in her eyes, he¡¯s a man that she would be proud of. He was afraid that she never thought of him as a man, afraid that in her eyes, he¡¯s been the younger brother that she needed to protect. Younger brother¡­Xia Mu closed his eyes as he tried to endure this pain, he really hated that term. The court officers behind him gave him a push and he walked into the prison van, sitting in silence as his body rock against the van¡¯s movement as he¡¯s being transported to the place where he would live for the next six years. _______________________________________________________________ Prison, to Xia Mu, was a place that he saw on television, and now, it¡¯s right before him. It stood tall and exudes a gloomy atmosphere. It opened its mouth, wanting to swallow him whole. The prison van slowly creeped towards the prison center and Xia Mu turned his head back, watching the gates closing behind him. Little by the little, they locked him inside, locked away his freedom, his youth, his future¡­ Xia Mu quietly followed the prison guards and the prisoners stood by their cell doors, looking at him in curiosity. Some whistled at him, some yelled at him, and some even laughed at him. Xia Mu still had that expressionless face on him, his empty eyes and handsome face showing no emotions. Maybe it¡¯s because of his emotionless face and attitude, some prisoners were unhappy and started to spurt out malicious words, causing a chaotic scene. The prison guards held out their batons and knocked them against the iron bars, telling them to be quiet! But it was useless, the prisoners got more arrogant and shouted even louder. Xia Mu just calmly walked down the hallway like he was not the one who caused this chaotic scene. The prison guards can¡¯t help it, but pushed him to walk more faster until they reach to the most inner cell, room 209. They opened the door and had Xia Mu entered the cell. Xia Mu lifted his gaze and looked around; it¡¯s not big, there were two bunk beds, one of them being empty at the upper bunk at the right side of the cell. The cell also contained three more prisoners, and they measured him up with their eyes: thin, pale, young, no sign of danger. ¡°Get along well! Don¡¯t stir up any trouble!¡± The prison guards warned them before closing the door and turning their bodies to leave. As the guards walked further away, the inmates¡¯ eyes lighten up, showing excitement and cruelty, like a hungry wolf seeing a sheep appearing right before their eyes. Two of the inmates stood up, one of them being a fit, young man. ¡°Hey new guy, what¡¯s your name?¡± He asked arrogantly. Xia Mu took a brief glance at him, then turned back, ignoring him. ¡°Damn, quite arrogant aren¡¯t you?¡± The man grabbed his collar and easily lifted him up as he spoke to him with a threatening tone. ¡°Don¡¯t you know what this place is? Let me teach you something, teach you doll a lesson!¡± Then he suddenly swung a fist towards him, but Xia Mu shifted his body slightly to the right and stopped the man¡¯s fist with his right hand. He used his left hand to strike, pulling with great force. The man stumbled forward and felt that his vision blurred as he fell down to the floor. Another inmate rushed towards Xia Mu, but he raised his leg and kicked him at the most vital part. The inmate couldn¡¯t scream out from the immense pain as he rolled around the floor and clutching onto his lower body. The first inmate that fell to the floor slowly crawled up, but as he placed both his palms onto the floor, he realized that his right hand had no strength. It felt limp and then instantly, pain was spreading throughout his body. He held onto his right arm as he walked up to the cell door and knocked onto the iron bars. ¡°Guards, guards, my arm is broken! I need to go to the infirmary, the infirmary!¡± The prison guards who were not far away quickly turned their bodies and rushed back to the cell, opening the cell door as they shouted angrily, ¡°I told you to behave! Keep on creating trouble, who did it?¡± ¡°I did.¡± Xia Mu confessed calmly. The prison guards stared at him as they lectured him. ¡°Newcomer, listen to me. If you want to leave this place safely, you better change yourself. If you fight with others here, we can extend your sentence! Understand?¡± Xia Mu lowered his gaze and didn¡¯t answer back. Then, the prison guards looked back at the other three inmates. ¡°And you three, stop doing this tradition of welcoming the newcomes, he¡¯s a murderer!¡± The three inmates looked at Xia Mu in shock, how would anyone believe that this cold and handsome boy would dare to kill someone? _______________________________________________________________ After that incident, maybe it was because of Xia Mu¡¯s fighting skills, or maybe it was because of the title ¡°murderer¡±, no one dared to provoke Xia Mu. The inmates in prison thought that this boy was too quiet, always sitting in a corner and leaning his back against wall. He would dip his head down, his handsome face carrying a pale expression and his beautiful yet empty eyes wander around aimlessly, and even his quiet breathing was scary. Even though Xia Mu was quiet, he still had a strong presence among the inmates, and they could not help it, but to look at him. They would pretend to test him him out to see if they could get a reaction from him. The inmate whose arm was broken by Xia Mu, shouted at him after watching him the whole day. ¡°Hey kid!¡± After blanking out for a long time, Xia Mu finally snapped back to reality and looked at him suspiciously. ¡°It¡¯s visiting hours soon, will there be someone that will visit you?¡± Xia Mu lowered his glance and didn¡¯t reply. ¡°Hey, can you say something? If yes then say yes, if no then say no, why are you so boring?¡± The inmate kept on talking to Xia Mu. ¡°I guess no one is going to come for you, seeing how boring you are. I guess your family is dead?¡± Xia Mu lifted his gaze and gave him a cold glare. ¡°Yo, you know how to glare, you know how to get angry, haha, finally you¡¯re not like a dummy.¡± The man laughed out loud. Finally not like a dummy? Why does that sound so familiar? Ah yes, she had said that to him before. That time, he would always ignore her, she would always provoke him by stealing his toy models and opening up his wounds. Then, when he got angry, when he cried, when he bit her, she would say, ¡°Pft, you can shout, you can cry, you can get angry, you can hit others, good! Finally, you¡¯re not like a dummy!¡± As Xia Mu thought about that girl, thought about his childhood, the corners of his lips lift up. He remembered that they would fight almost every single day. He hated her, and told everyone that the person he hated the most was Shu Yawang. He remembered when his grandfather wanted him to speak, he would ask him, ¡°Xia Mu, who did you hate the most?¡± Did he really hated her? At first he did. That time, he don¡¯t want anyone to get close to him, he liked being in his own little world, but she forced herself in. Regardless whether he wanted it or not, she barged into his world, telling him that she wanted to be his friend. Every day, she would go to his room and occupied his bed and grabbed his toy models, destroying his quiet, little world. So, he hated her, refused her, go against her. It was that one night when Tang Xiao Tian provoked some hooligans in the internet cafe. Even though she was trembling with fear, she still wanted to protect him. At that time, she didn¡¯t hesitate to have him hide behind her, not letting the hooligans discover him. When she was getting dragged out by them, she gave him a look, telling him to run away. That look, he still remembered to this day. It carried fear and panic, but as it looked towards him, it showed worry, urging, and even relief, relief that the hooligans didn¡¯t discover him. He thought, it was then that he started to accept her, just a little bit. But what really made him accept her was this phrase: ¡°Xia Mu, you become my pride, okay?¡± As she asked him under the moonlight with her warm eyes and gentle voice, his heart started to pound really hard. It was then that he know his heart can pound so quickly! From then on, he started to anticipate her arrival. Even though he continued to ignore her, refused to talk to her, and showing a face of dislike when she arrived, he knew that he started to use less strength as they fight and turned less confident when he said he hated her. When he¡¯s with her, he turned less stingy with his toy models. Sometimes, he would even secretly climbed up to the window to see her when she¡¯s arriving. After he kept on thinking about the memories, Xia Mu¡¯s expression warmed up, his eyes no longer looking cold and empty, and he unconsciously murmured out a sound¡­ ¡°Hey, did you just said something?¡± The inmate asked in bewilderment. Xia Mu was also bewildered, did he just said something? What did he say? ¡°Hey Old Xu, that kid just spoke.¡± The inmate with the broken arm ran to his friend excitedly to talk about the gossip. ¡°If he spoke then he spoke, it¡¯s not like he¡¯s mute, what¡¯s the big deal?¡± Old Xu replied back, looking at Xia Mu with a look of despise. After a while, he coughed and asked a question, ¡°Hey Old Zhu, what did he say?¡± ¡°I thought you didn¡¯t want to know.¡± Old Zhu said with an unhappy look on his face. ¡°I didn¡¯t say I didn¡¯t want to know, I just said that the kid is not mute.¡± He argued back. ¡°Tell me, what did he say?¡± ¡°I just asked who did he killed that led him here.¡± ¡°Who?¡± ¡°He said Yawang.¡± ¡°Yawang, who¡¯s that?¡± ¡°How would I know? But hearing the name, it sounded like a girl, maybe it¡¯s someone he likes.¡± ¡°Judging from his cold face, he would like someone?¡± The two inmates started to chit chat and made their assumptions. Prison life is very boring, so a little gossip can make their conversation go on for a very long time. _______________________________________________________________ The visiting hours are approaching and all the cell doors are opened. The prison guard held up a small book and started to read names off from it. The inmates who were called, walked out of the cell happily and waited in a line by the door. ¡°209¨CXia Mu, Zhu Qiang.¡± Old Zhu stood up excitedly after hearing his name. ¡°It¡¯s probably my daughter who came.¡± He turned around and patted Xia Mu¡¯s bed. ¡°Hey kid, stop daydreaming, someone is here for you.¡± Someone is here for him? Who will it be? Grandpa? Uncle Cheng? Yawang¡¯s father? Or¡­.her? Thinking about the possibility of her coming here made Xia Mu¡¯s heart clench. It¡¯s an indescribable feeling; he wanted to see her, but was also afraid to see her. He wanted to see her so much that he¡¯s going to turn crazy, but if she saw how he looks now, she will definitely cry. He don¡¯t want to see her cry. Every time he sees her cry, he thinks of her tears are like sulfuric acid, desperately eroding his heart, hurting him so much that he wanted to break whatever is near him, hurting him so much that he¡¯s going to turn crazy. But if he don¡¯t see her, she will start having thoughts. She would blame herself, thinking he¡¯s not living well, thinking he¡¯s being bullied¡­in that case, wouldn¡¯t she be even more sad? Then¡­.go see her! Even if she does cry, at least¡­.at least he still saw her! Xia Mu clenched onto his fist tightly and followed along to the visiting room. The small iron door was opened and Xia Mu crossed over the sill, seeing the family members sitting in a row across from the clear glass. Xia Mu was able to find her amongst the crowd, and as Shu Yawang lifted her gaze to the door and saw him, she was stunned for a moment, but soon greeted him with a faint and gentle smile. It¡¯s just like what it is in his memories, warm and beautiful. Xia Mu kept looking at her, not realizing that he slowed down his pace as he walked towards her and sat across from her. ¡°Yawang.¡± He spoke softly as he looked at her. His voice was so soft, so soft that if he spoke a little bit louder, he¡¯s afraid that she would disappear. He looked at the person sitting across the glass, calling out the name that he¡¯s been burying deep inside of him. Shu Yawang continued to look at him, the corners of her eyes turning red. She bit her lips and gently murmur back a sound. Xia Mu didn¡¯t say anything afterwards, reverting back to his quiet self. In fact, he had a lot to say to her, a lot of things to be concerned of. But¡­he who¡¯s naturally reserved, doesn¡¯t know where to start. Fortunately, she¡¯s been accustomed to his silence, so like the old days, she was the first one to speak. Maybe in this world, only Shu Yawang can endure his silence. He stayed silent, but she was able to read his words and his answers. _______________________________________________________________ She told him a lot of things that happened; told him that his Grandpa¡¯s health is good, told him that she¡¯s been in a good mood, she changed her job and moved into another city. She¡¯s been working hard on her job, her boss thinks highly of her, and her coworkers like her. She also told him that her current roommate was his high school homeroom teacher. She smiled faintly as she talked about herself, knowing that¡¯s what he wanted to know about. And him, he continued to stay silent as he heard her speak and looked at her, looked at her smile, looked at her facial expression as she speak, and watched her every move. She looked happy as she talked about her things, but he felt that something was off, so he interrupted her. ¡°What about Tang Xiao Tian?¡± What happened to Tang Xiao Tian? That man that she¡¯s been in love with, that man who she will spend the rest of her life with, why didn¡¯t she mention him? Her smile slowly turn stiff and her eyes revealed a trace of pain. She looked to the side, avoiding his glance, and he remained silent as he waited for her answer. After contemplating for awhile, he heard her say, ¡°We broke up.¡± He was stunned, not believing what he just heard. ¡°Why?¡± Shu Yawang bit on her lips hard, then said, ¡°Because¡­because¡­¡± She looked at him, not wanting to continue, but he continued to stare at her, stubbornly wanting to know. She heaved out a sigh and gave a bitter laugh. ¡°Because I¡­really missed you.¡± He looked at her suspiciously. She lowered her head and continue to murmur in a low voice, like she¡¯s talking to herself. ¡°I really missed you. Every time I eat, I would think, have you eaten yet? Every time I have a conversation with someone, I would think, how long has it been since you last spoken with someone? Every time I wake up, I would think, what are you going to be doing today? Working? Attending classes? Xia Mu, I missed you¡­I really missed you.¡± As she spoke, tears are flowing down. She quickly dips her head and wipe away the tears, her long hair hiding her face. Xia Mu¡¯s heart started to clench, he really wanted to hug her, wanted to wipe away her tears. Then, it seemed like Yawang thought of something. ¡°Xia Mu, where¡¯s the fish necklace that I gave you?¡± Xia Mu raised his hand and took out the the fish necklace for her to see. She looked at the fish with a faint smile, then looked back at him. ¡°Keep it safely in your hands, I¡¯ll wait for you until you get released.¡± Wait for him until he gets released? ¡°What do you mean?¡± Shu Yawang¡¯s face suddenly flushed and replied with a coy tone, ¡°This you don¡¯t even know¡­¡± At the end, she didn¡¯t say what does she mean. Just from the things that she told him during their meeting have created a lot of speculations. He knows that she¡¯ll be waiting for him until he gets released, he knows that she broke up with Tang Xiao Tian¡­.they finally broke up? He always thought that they will never break up, they will love each other for the rest of their lives, and he would stay at the side, silently watching them. At first, he really lost hope. In his eyes, there is no other couple in this world that are like Shu Yawang and Tang Xiao Tian. Every time Xiao Tian comes over, she would always be happy and mischievous that you would want to tweak her nose. And sometimes, she would turn shy and bashful, making people unable to move their eyes away. Those expressions belonged exclusively to the man that loved her blindly. Before, when he sees them together, he felt that they were very happy, so happy that he don¡¯t even have one shred of hope. But now, he has hope. Before seeing Tang Xiao Tian, that¡¯s how Xia Mu thinks. But now, maybe she might be his? Or maybe from that day on, the person that Shu Yawang is waiting for is now him? Would it be like this? Is this what she meant? _______________________________________________________________ Because of Shu Yawang¡¯s visit, Xia Mu daydream less compared to before. He would go attend classes with the inmates and participate in correctional labor. Even the inmates in room 209 can clearly feel that Xia Mu is in a good mood. How he is now is not like how he was before, although he¡¯s still quiet and doesn¡¯t talk much, they felt that his soul came back. At times when they were gossiping, they would turn their heads around and discovered that he¡¯s been listening to them. Because of his attention to them, they began to approach him. Old Zhu would tease him and asked, ¡°Was that your girlfriend who visited you?¡± After the inmates heard Old Zhu¡¯s question, they would laugh and join in. ¡°Of course, if not, how will he be able to continue to live?¡± Xia Mu shook his head, not saying a word, but he raised the corners of his lips. Girlfriend? No one have ever said that she was his girlfriend before. The feeling that he¡¯s feeling in his heart, it¡¯s so strange! Sweet, yet itchy, it¡¯s indescribable. He maintained that feeling until the second visit. _______________________________________________________________ He thought that it was her again, but as he crossed over the sill, he saw that man. That man was dressed in a military uniform and was looking closely at him. Xia Mu doesn¡¯t know why, but maybe because of how Xiao Tian looked, he felt guilty. He walked over slowly with his head down. The man across the glass was also silent for awhile before speaking up. ¡°Xia Mu, you¡­¡± But after saying these three words, he couldn¡¯t continue. He bite onto his lips and turned his head away. Xia Mu lift his gaze and look at him, just from looking at him, he knew what he wanted to say. He wanted to say, ¡°Xia Mu, how have you been? Xia Mu, did anyone bullied you? Xia Mu, I¡¯m sorry.¡± He is that type of man: honest, kind, a man who takes responsibility. He understands him, but because of that, he finds him annoying. It¡¯s because he can¡¯t beat this type of Tang Xiao Tian, he can¡¯t compete against him, he can¡¯t hate him. Tang Xiao Tian doesn¡¯t know how much Xia Mu envied him. Ever since he was little, he envied Tang Xiao Tian; envied over his strict father, his warm mother, his close friends, the girl he loves. But now, he¡¯s envious over the military uniform he¡¯s wearing. He¡¯s really envious, but his pride won¡¯t allow him to! Xia Mu turned his head away and took a deep breath before looking at him face to face. He understands Tang Xiao Tian, he knows that Xiao Tian doesn¡¯t want to see him, like how he doesn¡¯t want to see him. So the reason why Tang Xiao Tian came to see him, the thing that made him be in a hurry and has something to do with Xia Mu can only be one thing. ¡°Xia Mu, do you know where Yawang went?¡± Of course, it¡¯s because of her. Xia Mu lowered his head, not saying a word. ¡°The day after you were sent to prison, she was gone. She left a letter at her home and then left. Her parents were worried sick and all of her friends don¡¯t know where she went. So I thought if there was a possibility that she came to see you?¡± Tang Xiao Tian looked at Xia Mu with a hopeful expression. Xia Mu, you know where Yawang is, right? ¡°I¡¯ve been looking for her for so long, but I still couldn¡¯t find her.¡± Xiao Tian sounded like he¡¯s about to break down. ¡°Can you tell me where she is?¡± Xia Mu have his head down, not saying a word. He¡­he don¡¯t¡­he don¡¯t want to tell him. He¡¯s scared, scared that if he finds Yawang, then his small strip of hope will shatter. Yawang likes Xiao Tian so much, so much, so so much¡­Xia Mu closed his eyes and bit his lips hard. Tang Xiao Tian saw how he reacted, so he took a deep breath and stood up. ¡°If you don¡¯t know, then forget it.¡± As he turned around, he heard Xia Mu murmurmed from behind, ¡°I just know she¡¯s in W City.¡± Tang Xiao Tian had his back facing Xia Mu and he didn¡¯t move an inch as he said, ¡°Thank you, Xia Mu.¡± After that, he hurriedly ran out. Xia Mu slowly lowered his eyes, yes, she likes him so much, so , so¡­this is her happiness. He never thought about his own love and sacrificed her happiness. The kind of love that¡¯s not needed will only become a burden, a rope that is tied tightly around her, binding her, making her unhappy. So, he told him, go find her! Give up on her! _______________________________________________________________ The next few days, Xia Mu was a mess. As he was working, he accidentally lost a hammer and popped a boss¡¯ (most likely an inmate who everyone refers to as boss) blister with his hand. During class, his eyes would wander to the windows and he would not even touch his food during mealtimes. His eyes would not focus on one area, completely immersed in his own world. No one knows what he¡¯s thinking, some people are born with that kind of aura, being in their little world. When Xia Mu doesn¡¯t speak, room 209 is as silent as the water. The inmates there felt like there¡¯s a big rock pressing against their chests, making them having difficulty to breathe. No one understands why Xia Mu reverted back to how he was when he first came in, and no one can tell what he¡¯s hiding in his heart, even if they talked to him, they couldn¡¯t get a response. Over time, they turned more fearful as they looked at Xia Mu¡¯s eyes. They¡¯re afraid that if they talked to him, he would break down, and get themselves in harm. Old Zhu had asked Old Xu, ¡°Why do you think Xia Mu recently became like this?¡± Old Xu nodded his head like he had some sort of thought. ¡°He got dumped?¡± Then the two shook their heads, got dumped? Impossible! Last time it was a man who visited him, if it¡¯s to break up, it should be the girl. Then, Old Zhu suddenly thought of something and looked at Old Xu with widened eyes. ¡°Maybe that¡¯s the girl¡¯s new boyfriend and broke up with Xia Mu on her behalf. Girls, you know, are sensitive.¡± Everyone knows that something is wrong, but cannot give a convincing answer about it. This boy would sulk the whole day; as he study, work, eat, and sleep, he would do everything according to schedule, but it seemed that something left. This boy, it¡¯s like his soul have left him. Xia Mu would occasionally look out of the iron window of the cell, hearing footsteps passing by at a fixed time. At first when he heard the footsteps, he would become anxious until he couldn¡¯t hear them anymore. She didn¡¯t came, she still didn¡¯t came. A voice in his heart would shout at him, ¡°Tang Xiao Tian found her already! They¡¯re already together! Give up! Give up! From the beginning, the person that she loves is not you!¡± Everytime he hears these words echo over and over again in his head, it felt like nails are plunging into his heart, feeling the pain as it bleeds as his breathing passes through. His heart is hurting, is empty, but why does he still yearns for something? He would play back the scene where she visited him in prison over and over again. She said, ¡°I really missed you. Every time I eat, I would think, have you eaten yet? Every time I have a conversation with someone, I would think, how long has it been since you last spoken with someone? Every time I wake up, I would think, what are you going to be doing today? Working? Attending classes? Xia Mu, I missed you¡­I really missed you.¡± He would never knew that the words that she told him with a flushed face would give him so much courage and hope, but now it has turned into despair. Whenever he dreams at night, he would dream of a shadow waiting for him outside the cell door, then another shadow would stand next to her. At the end of the dream, he would be staring out of the iron window, watching them acting affectionately and walking away¡­.He would wake up from that dream and clutched onto the fish necklace as he sat silently, starting to think about her again. _______________________________________________________________ Six years, it¡¯s not long, but if you said it¡¯s short, it seemed like it was endless; living in the dark every day, not seeing day or night. He does not intentionally count the days and nights these past six years, and was not eager to go out. As he was about to forget the outside world, someone told him, ¡°Xia Mu, you¡¯re released from prison.¡± He looked up to the window as a ray of light shines into the darkness. He looked at the prison guard, his eyes showing neither joy nor sorrow. He¡¯s always like this, placid, like water and fire not immersing together. He lowered his eyes and changed into the clothes that the prison guard brought over for him. He walked out of the room step by step, his roommates looking at him with an envious expression. As he walked out of the door, he turned around and looked at them. Then he hung his head down and left without saying a word. ¡°Did that kid just looked at us?¡± Old Zhu asked in shock. ¡°Damn, we¡¯ve been living together for six years and this is the first time he looked at us.¡± ¡°Why do you think he looked at us?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± ¡°Is it to thank us for taking care of him these past years?¡± ¡°You¡¯re thinking too much¡­¡± ¡°Then why did he looked at us?!¡± Old Xu shouted at Xia Mu¡¯s back. ¡°Hey kid, go out and be a good man! Don¡¯t come back in here!¡± Xia Mu who was far away, suddenly stopped. He turned his body around and looked at them with his eyes as dark as ink. ¡°Take care.¡± After saying that, he turned around and left. Old Xu froze for a moment, and didn¡¯t speak up until after a long time. ¡°That kid is more beautiful now than when he just came in.¡± ¡°Damn, it¡¯s been way too long since you seen a woman.¡± Old Zhu commented with a look of despise, but he also admitted, ¡°He really is a beautiful child.¡± _______________________________________________________________ The main entrance door opens up, creating a piercing sound. She hurriedly places her hand down and walks a couple steps forward. She looks closely, seeing another door behind the main entrance door opening up, and a pair of long legs stepping forward, followed by its skinny and tall body frame. He walks two steps forward, standing below the sunlight, lifting his head up and squinting his eyes to see the clear, blue sky. Shu Yawang looks at him from afar, he¡¯s wearing a navy blue jacket and a baseball cap, his beautiful and exquisite face loses the trace of youthful innocence. He seems to find her staring as he blinks his eyes and turns his head around, looking back at her. He still have that expressionless look, she looks at him as the corners of her lips lift up, giving him a light smile as she looks at him. When he sees her smile, his facial expression softens and the corners of his lips slowly lifts up. Beneath the sunlight, the two who are standing a distance apart, looks at each other, smiling at one another. No one knows who steps forward first, but the distance between the two starts to diminish, the two stopping when they¡¯re only one step away from each other. Shu Yawang lifts her head to look at him, Xia Mu have grown taller and more handsome, but his aura haven¡¯t changed with his skinny, handsome face displaying the same expressionless look, his eyes still looking empty and cold, and his never-changing dark circles. Yawang looks at him closely, looks at him carefully, her lips carrying a smile, but her eyes reddening with tears, the tears flowing down her face. Xia Mu raises his hand to wipe the tears away, and she brings down his hand and holds onto it tightly. She looks down to his hand, it¡¯s now firm and rough. She rubs his palm and suddenly cries out loud, his hands¡­his pair of beautiful hands that are like a piece of artwork¡­now it¡¯s filled with scars and calluses, just like those construction workers. Just how much did he suffered? She rubs his hand with force, trying to smooth out the calluses on his hand. Xia Mu sighs out loud and pulls his hand away to pull her into his embrace, hugging her tightly. ¡°Don¡¯t cry, you know I¡¯m scared to see you cry.¡± He tells her softly. Yawang raises her arms to hug him back, nodding her head in his embrace. ¡°I¡¯m not crying, I won¡¯t cry.¡± She speaks with a choked voice. She hugs Xia Mu for awhile as she cries, and when she finally calms down, she rubs her face in his embrace to dry her tears. Then, she lifts her head and gives him a big smile. ¡°Xia Mu, welcome back.¡± He gives a small smirk. ¡°Mmm.¡± _______________________________________________________________ It ended, these endless six years have finally came to an end. He had almost forgotten the color of the sky, forgotten the crowded streets, forgotten today¡¯s date, tomorrow¡¯s date, the day after tomorrow¡¯s date. Sometimes, he would look at his reflection in the mirror and see his more stiff profile. He would raise his hand and gently rub against the mirror, his empty eyes carrying a trace of doubt. Is this him? Is this Xia Mu? In the quiet prison center, with its metal gates and iron bars. Six years, it was not as easy as he thought. But even then, he never regretted it, never did¡­