《Lies in Blood (Dark Secrets #4)》 Page 1 Waves crashed loudly in the darkness a few steps away and, somewhere in the distance, an echo rang out, repeating itself in one tone¡ªone word: ¡°True.¡± As I walked forward, feeling the sand between my toes, the violent wind rushed past my ankles, lifting the long cotton dress away, revealing things I didn¡¯t want him to know¡ªthings I couldn''t let him see; all the damage that had been done, all the promises made and broken, showed in every Mark on my skin.Advertisement I squatted down beside him, letting the waves roll up and soak my toes, the cool, fizzy tingle reminding me how it felt to be human. ¡°David?¡± I whispered, reaching to touch his shoulder, but stopped. ¡°What are you doing?¡± ¡°I have to make it right,¡± he said, his whole body shaking with the force he used against his hand¡ªhis arm straight, disappearing at the wrist beneath the water. ¡°How can you make this right, after everything that¡¯s been done?¡± ¡°Death.¡± He frowned, his eyes fixed on nothing. ¡°If her heart stops beating, the pain will go away.¡± I looked past the whitewash to the hazy figure beneath. Her lips sat parted, her eyes rolled to the back of her head. There was no sorrow or regret there. Not anymore. She opted out¡ªran away and left him to deal with this pain alone. ¡°I¡¯ll help you,¡± I said, dropping to my knees, my dress flaring like a parachute in the waves around me as I placed my hand to her skull. David turned his head, his green eyes meeting mine. ¡°You¡¯re going to help me?¡± I nodded, knowing this was wrong, but knowing also that if I didn''t ease his pain, he¡¯d leave with that creature under the waves, and he¡¯d return as something darker than he was now. ¡°David?¡± ¡°Yes?¡± ¡°What will you do without her?¡± He looked up sadly at the ocean, somewhere past the edge of the horizon, but his gaze returned with a smile. ¡°Die.¡± ¡°No!¡± I shot bolt upright in my bed, a mess of sweat cooling my face as the sea breeze whispered past my curtains and touched my brow. ¡°You okay, Ara?¡± David pushed up on his elbow, his hand appearing on my shoulder. ¡°God, you¡¯re soaking.¡± He sat up more. ¡°What happened?¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± I touched my lips. ¡°I had another dream.¡± ¡°The one where I kill you?¡± I nodded. He shifted closer and hugged me, rolling us both back onto the pillows. Through the dome window above us, the pale light of a moon in its first quarter shone down with the coming dawn, leaving dull, coloured patterns across the white sheets. I was safe here¡ªcomfortable in David¡¯s arms, the world I woke to now no longer startling me in the first few seconds I opened my eyes. My mind and body had finally adjusted to my giant new bed, airy new room, and crowded, busy new life. But the nightmares I suffered the past week were stirring things up, making me uneasy, afraid to go to sleep. The song of crickets outside carried along the breeze through the open balcony door and filled the silence with familiarity as the edginess in my limbs fizzled away. I listened carefully to David, though, for any thoughts I might catch. His breathing was shallow, while his fingertip made one line over my shoulder blade repeatedly. He was worried. But I wasn¡¯t sure if my dream or something else had stolen his mind to thought. ¡°Nothing could ever bring me to harm you, Ara. You know that, right?¡± ¡°I know,¡± I said, but the nod I attempted failed. My eyes sat wide, staring into the dream. ¡°It just felt so real.¡± He kissed my brow, snuggling down a little lower in the bed. ¡°Bad dreams usually reflect inner-turmoil. Maybe you¡¯re feeling guilty for something.¡± ¡°Guilty for what?¡± I grinned. ¡°Perhaps . . . for my brother. For being forced to deny his friendship.¡± ¡°It doesn''t affect me that much, David.¡± He kissed my head again, wiping his hand down the sweat between my shoulder blades. ¡°Liar. I know it does, Ara. It would affect anyone, but you¡ªyou¡¯re so careful of other¡¯s feelings. I know it eats you up.¡± ¡°Then why ask it of me? If you know how much it hurts me, why keep us from being friends?¡± ¡°Because he¡¯s in love with you.¡± ¡°So what?¡± ¡°So, you¡¯re young. Impressionable. Spirit bound to him¡ª¡± ¡°David, I¡¯m a vampire. That bind is so broken now it¡¯s not even worth mentioning.¡± ¡°Still,¡± he said softly. ¡°Best keep you both away from temptation. Not to mention¡ª¡± He huffed a breath out through his nose, ¡°¡ªI still haven¡¯t forgiven him for binding you in the first place.¡± ¡°Fair enough, I suppose.¡± I nodded against his chest, biting the tip of my thumb. ¡°And, so, you think that¡¯s it¡ªthat I''m having these dreams because I feel guilty about hurting Jason?¡± ¡°I hope so,¡± he said, brushing my hair back. ¡°Because the only other conclusion I can come up with is that you think I might hurt you.¡± ¡°For what reason would you ever do that?¡± He exhaled, his chest sinking under my cheek. ¡°None . . . hopefully.¡± Chapter One The hum of voices down the table melted into the soft sound of the piano being played in the corner. I watched the pianist¡¯s deft fingers move across the keys, wishing I could trade places with him. I¡¯d much rather be playing piano¡ªnot a care in the world¡ªthan sitting at breakfast addressing things I spent all day either discussing or thinking about. There really was no escape from being queen. David caught my gaze and glanced over his shoulder to follow it, smiling back at me gently after. And for that split second, nothing really seemed that bad in the world. He was here, right across the table from me, just as I¡¯d wanted for so long. And after dinner tonight, I could sit by that piano until dawn if I wanted, maybe even beside my king, playing a duet. Nothing in the world would grant me better reason to smile than to hear him play again. ¡°And how is our new king faring after his coronation?¡± Margret asked, breaking David and I from our locked gazes. ¡°Very well, thank you, Margret.¡± He bowed his head. ¡°Any new developments with your powers?¡± Walt asked. ¡°Our queen¡¯s powers flourished remarkably after her own coronation.¡± David looked at me, holding back a smile. ¡°None yet, but it¡¯s only been a week.¡± I sighed into my plate. So we¡¯re not telling them you can read my mind? Or that you can read mine, he thought back. ¡°What¡¯s wrong, Ar?¡± Mike asked quietly, leaning across the corner of the table toward me. ¡°I''m just tired.¡± I dropped my spoon into my porridge, slumping my elbow down by my napkin. ¡°Why¡¯d you come down for breakfast then?¡± ¡°Yeah, you never eat breakfast with the people,¡± Morg added. I looked down the table to watch David talking with Arthur, his eyes bright, his hands moving like he was speaking in Sign. ¡°He said I had to¡ªthat it was my ¡°queenly duty¡± to eat with my people.¡± ¡°He¡¯s right,¡± Morgaine said, sitting back to sip her juice. ¡°I know. But I just feel so . . . I don''t know.¡± I leaned on my other hand. ¡°Ever since his coronation last week, I just feel so under the weather.¡± ¡°Are you sick?¡± Mike asked, pressing a hand to my brow. I shrugged, sitting back in my chair, looking up quickly when I heard my name. ¡°Are you okay?¡± David asked aloud, but his voice came through with a strong warning¡ªholding the weight of everything we¡¯d discussed this past week about my duties as queen. I smiled, laying the napkin gently across my lap. ¡°I feel very well, thank you. Amazing what Chef¡¯s porridge can do for a little fatigue.¡± ¡°Very well.¡± David nodded once in that kingly manner of his, and went back to his chat with Arthur. Beside me, Mike¡¯s eyes shrunk from the roundness of confusion to tiny slits under a frown. He leaned in and whispered, ¡°Since when do you perk up for the sake of appearances?¡± ¡°Since David¡¯s been giving me a few lessons in royal etiquette.¡± Mike and Morg exchanged glances, and Emily, so bright and fresh at this hour of the morning, offered a gentle smile. I looked away. Her special immortal ¡°connection¡± with David that allowed her to sense his feelings didn¡¯t give her right to think she knew what was going on with me. But from the corner of my eye then, I noticed her and David looking at each other; David''s gaze was quick, and Emily¡¯s response¡ªlooking into her plate¡ªmade my spine straighten. David? I thought. What? Are you holding a private conversation with her? Who? Emily! ¡°Yes, Uncle. Now that the castle is vacant, I was hoping to head out there this week,¡± he said, ignoring me. ¡°We have over two hundred prisoners in those cells, Your Majesty,¡± Walter said. ¡°You will need more than the five men you¡¯ve got to go through their files and determine their right for parole.¡± ¡°I¡¯ve been through most of the cases myself already,¡± he said. ¡°In fact, I sentenced at least a quarter of them, and my uncle the rest. It should take five men only three days to complete the task.¡± David? He kept his eyes on Walter, giving vague details about the members in his ¡®clean-out-the-prison¡¯ team. David, I huffed, slamming my palm onto the table. Yes. Yes, what? I shot the thought at him with enough force to almost burst a blood vessel. Yes. She asked me a question. I answered, he thought. What question? I asked, cursing the day I ever found out that David could still read Emily¡¯s mind, despite her being a vampire. It¡¯s not relevant. My breakfast suddenly hit my gut like an iron hammer. Why? Because. David, you can¡¯t have private conversations with Emily and expect me not to wonder what it¡¯s about. What if I did that with Mike¡ªor Jason? I waited, getting madder by the second. She just asked if everything between you and I was okay, he finally responded. And . . . why would she ask that? She thinks I¡¯m being cruel. He smiled across at me. That I forced you to come to breakfast. What makes her think that? He laughed to himself¡ªhis secret smile stealing my heart. Because she knows you. Knows you¡¯d never get out of bed this early without a fight. I shrugged. Can she read your thoughts now, too? No. Are you going to tell her I can? He turned his head and replied to Arthur¡¯s question. I half expected to have to wait for his answer, but it came through while he was talking, a skill I had not yet mastered. I sighed, picking up my spoon to eat the porridge again. He was right. It could be dangerous for anyone to be aware that he and I had any more power than they already knew about. In this society, I was starting to understand why everyone kept their secrets. It seemed less lonely, though, knowing I wasn¡¯t the only one who didn''t know who to trust. And I was glad David didn¡¯t even trust Emily with the secret of his new powers. She was already two steps too deep into David¡¯s circle of trust. Arm¡¯s-length was the best place to keep her. Page 2 ¡°What is with you, Ar?¡± Mike caught the bitterness in my turned lip, reaching across to take Emily¡¯s hand, despite that she hadn''t actually seen me look at her that way.Advertisement ¡°Nothing.¡± I picked up my spoon again and gracelessly shovelled the slop into my gob, stealing myself a moment inside my own head. The morning light moved across the glossy floorboards of the Great Hall in giant rectangles, spilling over the table and the vampires like they were nuisances in its path, warming one side of the room, giving halos to the heads closest to the giant windows. I turned my gaze to the painting behind me¡ªthe giant oil depiction of Lilith mounting the fireplace¡ªand gave her a weak smile, wondering if she¡¯d hated keeping up with appearances as much as I did. She didn¡¯t smile back¡ªnot any more than she usually did and, even then, it was fake¡ªa waning smile frozen in time, as if she¡¯d sat for that portrait on a day that had broken her heart. Now, it sat gloriously overlooking the Great Hall and all its occupants, but I got the feeling she just wanted to be covered over and stored in a dark room¡ªaway from it all. A bright flicker of white light flashed across her nose for a second, blinding me as I turned back to face the front. I put my hand up to shield my eyes, frowning at Jase until I saw his smile, saw his gaze flick to the silver culprit, floating a few inches into the air above the table, shining the glare in my direction. What are you doing? David looked up. What do you mean? I wasn''t talking to you. His head turned slowly to look at Jason. ¡°Brother,¡± he said in a tone so sharp the spoon fell onto the tabletop with a clunk. Only a few people in their immediate vicinity noticed, but respectfully averted their eyes and attention until David drew his murderous gaze back from Jason. But the sheepish smile Jason flicked my way then made me smile, and now I couldn''t quite drop it. It might have been an unofficial, albeit firm, ruling that he and I couldn''t be friends, but that didn''t mean he was gone. He was still here for me, and I felt that, even if I wasn¡¯t allowed to. ¡°Yes?¡± I said, turning to the person who tapped my shoulder, but there was no one there. I looked behind me, beside me, frowning in Morg¡¯s then Mike¡¯s direction every few seconds, wondering if they¡¯d tapped me. And as I turned back to the front, something tapped me again, this time on my left shoulder. ¡°Stop that,¡± Arthur whispered gruffly, and metal clanged loudly on the ground by my foot. Jason laughed, catching my eye, making the burning stare I could feel from my husband hotter as the room silenced. ¡°That¡¯s two, brother,¡± David said. ¡°Apologies, my king.¡± Jason stood, clearing his throat, and looked down at me. ¡°Can you pass my spoon, please, Your Majesty?¡± All eyes slowly drifted from Jason to David to me. The shoulder-tapping offender lay on the floor by my feet, hesitation rising off it like stilling fumes, turning a simple metal kitchen implement into a do or don¡¯t. I bent down, grasped it softly and sat straight again, the spoon flat on my palm. ¡°You want it? Get it yourself.¡± Jason grinned, accepting my challenge, but instead of using his mind to carry the spoon, defying all laws of gravity, he pushed his chair out with the backs of his legs and walked calmly past each head, defying his king. ¡°My lady.¡± He bowed, scooping the spoon right out of my palm before turning my hand and brushing his lips across my knuckles in a very polite, but ultimately cheeky, kiss. Blade and Nathan were the only two brave enough to laugh. Everyone else practically held their breath, and when I looked upon David¡¯s tight jaw as the table chatter slowly resumed again, I feared a little for Jason¡¯s well-being. He¡¯s just teasing you, David, I thought. A grey cloud of irritation passed over him. He exhaled, going back to his conversation with a coating of less-than-amused paint reddening his face. Even he knew it was all in fun. Those two had been stirring each other since conception. It was just so funny to see it firsthand. You shouldn¡¯t press him that way, Jase, I thought, not really sure if David could hear it, too. But if he did, he didn¡¯t bother to look up. Jason offered an apologetic half-turn of his lip, lifting one shoulder slightly. He looked so cute and boyish then that I laughed, stifling it quickly before David could notice we were ¡®interacting.¡¯ Then again, he seemed quite distracted with being king. I could tell from the way he smiled, the way he sat so tall and straight, the way he moved his hands in a slow, regal manner, that he was having the time of his life. He was born for this role, and I was merely a bystander in the awe of his radiance. His people had fallen at his feet, showering him with their love and respect from the moment he came back from the dead. They didn¡¯t really need a queen to guide them out all this time. They needed a king, but not any king. They needed, we all needed, David. He looked my way for a second, a glance that made me curious about which thoughts he could access in my head. So far, according to him, it was only projected thoughts he could hear, but with that look he just gave me, it seemed as if maybe he was hearing more than he let on. I smiled to myself, coming up with a clever way to test it, then looked over at Jason and focused only on him. Jase? He slowly set his eyes on me, his head staying forward. I''m going to think something for the purpose of a test. They¡¯re not my real thoughts, okay? I said. He turned in his seat, intrigue lighting up his eyes and the sudden smile that slipped across his lips. I tried not to smile back, making my jaw tight as I leaned on my hand and, without sending the thought to anyone at all, told myself how lovely Jason looked in that white shirt, with his hair smoothly brushed back, one thick lock falling against his brow, his bright green eyes casting beams of excitement across my heart every time they met mine. But David didn''t even flinch. Nothing. There was no way he could hold the anger in if he heard that kind of thought. It was confirmed. He couldn¡¯t hear me unless I projected a thought. Okay, test done. I smiled at Jase. He bowed his head, touching his heart. The midday sun sat over the manor, offering more shadows in the corridors than light. I pushed the library door open and my eyes went straight up to the top of the bookshelves wrapping the windows on either side of the fireplace. They were normally decked out, packed tightly with brown spines and a party of dust motes dancing in the sunlight. But, today, the shelves were mostly empty, the books piled up on tables and chairs, making small cities over the wood floors throughout both levels of the room. The new librarian looked up from her pile and bowed her head once before going back to her all-important task of cataloguing and labelling. She hadn¡¯t been made immortal yet, and the sound of her very human heart caught me off guard a little, a part of me wondering then if she was safe in here without a knight on watch. Then again, she was still alive, wasn¡¯t she? No one had eaten her yet. So, I shrugged it off and grabbed the gold railing, my hand sliding over it on the way up the stairs to the second floor. As I reached the top, though, a cold palm cupped my mouth, gagging my scream. The mighty force of my elbow went into the person¡¯s ribs, but he just laughed, dragging me by the waist into a nook between two shelves. ¡°So what was that all about?¡± he said, releasing me. ¡°Jase!¡± I slapped his chest lightly, not really able to pull my hand back far enough to do it hard in this tiny space. ¡°You scared me. And what was what all about?¡± ¡°At breakfast this morning.¡± He grinned. ¡°That sweet train of thought you went off on.¡± ¡°Oh. Um.¡± I poked my head out and checked down both corridors of the balcony, peering into the lower level as well before sliding back into our little niche. ¡°David has a new power.¡± ¡°Broader mind reading.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± He ran his hand through his hair. ¡°I knew it. I just knew it.¡± ¡°Why do you say that?¡± We walked out of the space and into the openness of the library again. ¡°And you were testing if he could read random thoughts?¡± ¡°Yeah,¡± I said with a bit of irritation. ¡°But you didn''t answer my question. What do you know about all this?¡± He sat down on the armchair by the shelf, sighing. ¡°He can''t read random thoughts. But he can read projected thoughts, and not just your projected thoughts, either.¡± ¡°Yours too?¡± My eyes widened. ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°Oh my god.¡± I sat down on the lamp table beside him. ¡°Are you serious? I mean, how do you know?¡± ¡°I was walking the labyrinth the other day, and our paths crossed. He greeted me as usual and, in my solemn state, I thought how nice it¡¯d be to punch him in the jaw.¡± My mouth dropped a little. ¡°Anyway, it was weird. He kinda . . . he smiled like something was funny, then continued on his way without saying anything.¡± ¡°So you think he heard your thought?¡± ¡°I¡­well, yeah. I pretty much screamed it to the gods.¡± He laughed. ¡°You hate him¡ªDavid?¡± ¡°No.¡± His shoulders slumped and he looked down at his thumbs, running one over the other a few times. ¡°I don''t. But I wish I had his life.¡± I smiled softly. ¡°I didn''t take you for the kingly sort.¡± ¡°Not his life as king, Ara.¡± He bumped me softly with his elbow. ¡°If I were David, I would have run away with you, lived a normal life, free of all this.¡± I placed both hands gently in my lap, looking around at all this. ¡°It¡¯s safer here.¡± ¡°No, it¡¯s not. And David knows that, but he cares more about the throne than he does about¡ª¡± He swallowed his own words, almost physically choking on them. ¡°I''m sorry. I shouldn¡¯t speak that way about him. I¡ª¡± ¡°Jase?¡± I stood as he walked across the room. ¡°It¡¯s okay, really. You¡ª¡± ¡°I better go,¡± he cut in, turning around to face me again. ¡°I''m not supposed to be alone with you.¡± ¡°We¡¯re not alone.¡± I motioned to the librarian downstairs. Jase gave her a quick smile, which landed on his feet after. ¡°This is too alone for my brother¡¯s wishes. I¡¯ll see ya at dinner.¡± He patted my shoulder then disappeared, and I stood for a few moments among the shelves and the smell of old pages trying to remember what I came into the library for in the first place. The housekeeper said he was in the study, the librarian said he was in the garden, and the gardener told me to look in the Throne Room. But as I climbed the stairs of the Great Hall after searching all those places, I heard him call my name. ¡°Arthur, there you are.¡± ¡°You were looking for me?¡± He caught up on the midway, casually leaning on the railing when he stopped. He looked like human-Arthur today with his hair still wet from a shower, a white T-shirt over denim jeans, sporting that unshaven look that suited his nephews so well. Page 3 ¡°Everywhere,¡± I said, leaning beside him.Advertisement ¡°We must have been on a wild goose chase. I¡¯ve been looking for you.¡± ¡°Why?¡± He balanced his elbow on the railing, cupping a hand over his wrist. ¡°There was a pregnancy test in the infirmary storage closet. Did you take it?¡± I held it up. ¡°Why? Did you want it for something?¡± ¡°Why are you doing a pregnancy test?¡± ¡°I still haven¡¯t got my. . .¡± I paused on the word, knowing Arthur was old-fashioned. ¡°My, uh¡ª¡± ¡°Period?¡± I laughed a little. ¡°Um, yeah. So, I thought I¡¯d just see if some miracle had occurred.¡± Arthur stood up. ¡°What?¡± I stood up, too. ¡°My dear, a pregnancy to my nephew would not be a miracle. It would be a tragedy.¡± My shoulders dropped. ¡°I know. I just. . . a part of me just¡ª¡± ¡°Wants his baby.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I looked at my feet. ¡°I love him. I want to carry his child. Is that selfish?¡± ¡°No, my dear.¡± He touched my shoulder. ¡°And to be excited about the miracle of life, even if it meant your husband¡¯s death, would not be a sin, either. I¡¯m sorry. It was wrong of me to say that.¡± ¡°No, you were right, Arthur. If I have a baby with him, there¡¯s no one else that can use the¡ª¡± I covered my mouth to whisper, ¡°Dagger of Yahanna on Drake.¡± ¡°Yes, but I was quick-tongued, Amara. All life is a miracle, no matter the consequence.¡± ¡°But, in this case, also means death.¡± I toyed with the small box. He cupped his hands over mine and the box. ¡°Please don''t do that test.¡± ¡°But, Arthur, if you and I are going to . . . you know, go all Thanksgiving and get happy with a turkey baster, I need to make sure I''m not putting myself through that for nothing.¡± ¡°I know. But . . . please wait. David will journey to Elysium this weekend to free the prisoners, you can do it then.¡± ¡°Why then?¡± ¡°If he¡¯s around when you. . . if you were to discover that you were pregnant, and he, with his ability to read your thoughts again, discovered this, he would not waste time. He would leave immediately to kill Drake.¡± ¡°You think?¡± I looked at the test. ¡°I am sure of it.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I handed the test to Arthur. ¡°Hold onto this for me then. I¡¯ll do it on Saturday.¡± Arthur smiled, bowing a little as he backed away. ¡°Oh, and, Arthur.¡± I reached out for him. ¡°Yes, my dear?¡± ¡°Um, there¡¯s been a new development.¡± I folded my arms and walked closer, half checking for sly ears. ¡°With. . . With that new power I told you about.¡± He cleared his throat, stepping close enough to be accused of wanting a hug. ¡°David¡¯s mind reading ability?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± I checked over my shoulder then leaned in to whisper in his ear. ¡°He can read Jason¡¯s projected thoughts.¡± Arthur¡¯s spine straightened. ¡°Good God.¡± ¡°Yeah. He¡¯s pretty damn powerful.¡± He leaned on the railing again, looking down at the test before tucking it in his back pocket. ¡°The left-handed child.¡± ¡°Huh?¡± ¡°David. He was always the left-handed child, so I wasn¡¯t surprised when Jason¡ªthe right-handed¡ªturned out to have a broader range of skills than his brother upon being turned. But with David having taken his oath, the added power of Mother Nature is like gaining another layer of immortality. His left brain will be developing at a rapid rate, giving him skills on equal to, possibly greater than, his brother.¡± I laughed. ¡°Only half of that made sense, Arthur.¡± His lips spread in an easy grin. ¡°The powers one gains when becoming immortal are based greatly on which side of the brain they use more.¡± ¡°So, left-brained people get more power?¡± ¡°No. It¡¯s not about greater or weaker powers, but which powers. I was ambidextrous in my human life.¡± He held out both hands. ¡°When I turned, the function in my brain which allowed me to use both sides simultaneously also gave me the ability to think at a higher level of consciousness¡ªto see past the impossible, bypass the rules of physics and control things others couldn¡¯t.¡± ¡°So, if David¡¯s brain is essentially becoming ambidextrous, could he end up with powers like yours?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not sure. The strength of his coronation cannot change his brain¡¯s imprint. He cannot suddenly gain power that was never possible; it will merely open his mind to what it was capable of before. Whatever Jason is capable of¡ª¡± His eyes narrowed, his gaze distant. ¡°David may be very soon, also.¡± ¡°So I should watch to see if he starts writing with his right hand?¡± I laughed. ¡°No. Watch your thoughts, and I will make sure I watch mine.¡± I felt a chill pass through me. ¡°What if he found out about. . .¡± ¡°He can never find out what happened between us in that training hall, Amara. Ever. Because it will not just be my head on a spike¡ª¡± He turned and looked at me. ¡°It¡¯ll be yours.¡± I wanted to object, tell him David would never do that to me. But Arthur was right. He did it to Pepper, he tried to do it to Jason, and being his wife did not place me above the law in David¡¯s mind. He¡¯d even said as much. If I broke the law by fornicating or even plotting to fornicate with his uncle, he¡¯d punish me to the full extent of the law. Unless. . . ¡°Wait! Aren¡¯t I allowed to have more than one husband?¡± ¡°Yes. But that won¡¯t protect you from what we¡¯ve done in the past, my dear. And, in order to marry another man, you must submit your intent to marry with the Lower Parliament and it must be approved by the people before you can so much as think about touching him.¡± ¡°Really?¡± ¡°Yes. Our laws on fidelity are ironclad.¡± ¡°Do you think we should. . .?¡± He laughed, his sweet smile warming his blue eyes, showing the younger, human version of Arthur. ¡°No. Absolutely not, my dear. That would be suicide, and I don¡¯t fancy explaining to my nephew why we¡¯ve suddenly developed a love enough to marry.¡± ¡°You¡¯re right. Sorry.¡± I screwed my face up in awkward frown. ¡°I wasn¡¯t really thinking.¡± ¡°It¡¯s quite all right.¡± He wrapped his arm over my shoulder and pulled me close for a second. ¡°We¡¯ll figure this out. For now, mind your thoughts and bide your time. And hope to God you¡¯re not carrying his child, or this fight will be over before it¡¯s begun.¡± I nodded, sighing out my disappointment as Arthur walked away. Court was packed. More bodies had crammed themselves into that Throne Room since David returned as king than they had on the day of my coronation. I glanced at my husband on his throne and offered a smile, standing taller as I walked across the platform in front of the hundreds, all waiting for an appointment with their king. I could smell the tasty blood of those who had come over from the Dark Side¡ªa number that far outweighed the amount of heartbeats I could hear in the room¡ªand rather than making me hungry, it made me uneasy. If all those vampires suddenly turned on my people, it would be a slaughter without chance for a war. ¡°Now there¡¯s a sight for sore eyes. Where have you been all day, my love?¡± David reached for my hand as I sat down. ¡°I asked after you, but no one seemed to know where you were.¡± ¡°I had business to take care of.¡± ¡°Business?¡± His brow arched. ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°And what business does a queen have that she cannot share with her king?¡± The noise of the people had a gentle kind of hum to it, enough that I almost felt like a human in a room full of humans¡ªlike none of the people in the first few rows could hear our private chatter if they wanted. ¡°Talk about it later?¡± He smiled, squeezing my hand gently. ¡°This suits you.¡± ¡°What does?¡± ¡°This.¡± He nodded to the adoring masses. ¡°Being queen.¡± ¡°You think?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± He leaned a little closer, closing the gap between our chairs. ¡°Wanna know a secret?¡± ¡°Mm-hm.¡± I smiled, loving the burn of excitement my heart felt every time he came back down to earth long enough to be My David again. ¡°I always dreamed of this. Always wanted to be king. But, in all my fantasies, had never imagined such a queen beside me¡ªcould never have crafted such a beautiful creature as you.¡± ¡°Aw, shucks.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not kidding, Ara,¡± he said, his voice soft but firm. ¡°I know we give you a hard time. I know I¡¯m on your back a lot lately about being a perfect queen, but you rise to every challenge I set, and I¡¯m proud of you. And I¡¯m proud to sit beside you as your king.¡± I held very still, taking a moment to bask in the warmth of his words. ¡°So, nice-David got out of bed today?¡± He laughed. ¡°He does that . . . on occasion.¡± I squeezed his hand back. ¡°I miss you.¡± ¡°I know.¡± He sat tall in his chair again as Walter banged the stick, settling the room to silence. ¡°High Lord of the Court, please present the first case,¡± I said. Chapter Two The House of the Damned had grown since we first built it. In only a few months, the rectangle building, with enough space to sleep ten children comfortably, now had its own observation wing, secure section, adoption offices, and staff cafe¡ªfor the Lilithians and humans. Its expanse of one-building-tall, fifteen-cars-long, had grown to two stories high on the west wing and sat in an L shape at least thirty cars long, shining like a glorious shrine under the daylight among the green fields. It was a place anyone would be glad to call home, and I felt a pang of pride for making it all happen. We¡¯d come a long way from those days I sat merely thinking about the children, recording the nightmares they caused me in my diary. I wandered down the hillside, stomping my feet a little harder than necessary for a light-footed immortal, driven toward the Damned House like a child on her way to a play-date, but stopped when I heard my name. ¡°Oh, hey, Jase. Didn¡¯t see you there.¡± ¡°Come ¡®ere a sec?¡± He curled his arm inward, waving me over. I detoured toward the square of cement, catching the basketball that bounced in my direction. ¡°When did we get a hoop?¡± He looked up at the glass-backed board. ¡°Mike just had it installed. I¡¯m testing it out.¡± ¡°Cool.¡± I ditched the ball and watched it slip through the hoop without touching the sides. ¡°Why¡¯d he put it out here? This group of kids aren¡¯t allowed outside.¡± Page 4 ¡°Yet.¡± Jase grinned. ¡°Well¡ª¡± I tossed him the ball, half aware of the little faces watching us through the window behind me. ¡°Hopefully, they¡¯ll just be cleared for adoption soon and we won¡¯t need an institute for them. Or maybe we¡¯ll just find that cure instead.¡±Advertisement ¡°Yeah, actually, I have a few theories on that,¡± he said, bouncing the ball as he spoke. ¡°I wanna test out your blue light¡ªsee exactly what kind of electricity it is, because that whole heart-starting thing has my head going round in circles.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Well, it seems to be made up of static energy, but that shouldn¡¯t cause such a dramatic effect when shoot¡ª¡± ¡°Ara!¡± Jase stopped talking and looked up the hill. ¡°Great,¡± he muttered under his breath. I spun around to watch David approach at a fast, human pace. ¡°Hi, David.¡± ¡°What are you doing here?¡± ¡°It¡¯s Tuesday,¡± I said flatly. ¡°I always visit the children on Tuesday.¡± ¡°How convenient.¡± He stood beside me, eyeing his brother. ¡°And you both just happened to cross paths.¡± Jase sighed, tossing the ball away over his shoulder. ¡°Whatever, man.¡± ¡°I believe the title you were looking for is Your Majesty,¡± David called after Jason, who just shook his head, walking slowly off over the hill. ¡°You didn¡¯t have to do that.¡± I glared up at my king. ¡°He was here before I got here. I ran into him.¡± ¡°Like I said.¡± He turned away. ¡°Convenient.¡± ¡°You really do think the worst of people, don¡¯t you?¡± ¡°No.¡± He headed toward the house. ¡°I think the worst of him.¡± ¡°He¡¯s your brother, David.¡± He turned around and walked backward. ¡°And I love him as such. Provided he stays away from my wife.¡± I imprisoned my smile, shaking my head, watching the bright sun turn to shadow over David¡¯s brown hair as he disappeared under the eaves of the house, flicking a quick grin my way before heading inside. How could that man irritate me so much, then blast it all away with one look? I groaned, running after him. ¡°Would you wait up?¡± He held the door open with his foot, signing both himself and me in to the logbook. ¡°I¡¯m just giving him a hard time, Ara. You know that, right?¡± ¡°No, you¡¯re doing everything you can to make sure he¡¯s afraid to even look at me.¡± The door closed behind me, locking into place as it shut. ¡°Can you blame me?¡± ¡°No,¡± I said, folding my arms. ¡°But don¡¯t try to play innocent when I accuse you of being nasty.¡± ¡°Fine. I¡¯m being nasty. Get over it.¡± He handed me a visitor¡¯s pass. ¡°If he¡¯d never spirit bound you, we wouldn¡¯t have a problem.¡± I groaned, rolling my eyes, then held up the badge. ¡°What¡¯s this for?¡± ¡°I want you to come to the restricted block¡ªsee Max.¡± I lowered the pass, toying with it for a second as the image of Max on the day I first met him flashed in my mind. He was so small and so thin, and his eyes were so hollow and dark. But it wasn¡¯t the eternal sadness of his little soul that haunted me the most. It was the way the keeper¡¯s metal stick speared his ribs and broke his skin, the child screaming then just laying there¡ªall instinct to fight dead inside him. ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± David cupped my hand and steered the badge up to my chest, pinning it to my blouse. ¡°He doesn¡¯t remember anything now.¡± I nodded. ¡°I heard it took several sessions with Jason.¡± ¡°Yes, but last night, Max actually slept.¡± I smiled at my feet. ¡°What about Joshua¡ªhis brother?¡± David hooked a finger under my chin to roll it upward. ¡°They¡¯re both fine. Come see.¡± When we cleared the second security gate and locked it behind us, I heard a little voice squeal my name and a flash of gold hair tied with a pink ribbon caught my eye across the room, appearing beside me a second later. ¡°Look what I can do, Ara.¡± ¡°I¡¯m watching, Lacey.¡± I stood back, folding my arms, a smile holding a certain amount of excitement and interest across my face. ¡°One, two, thr¡ª¡± Lacey grunted on the last word, tipping herself forward as both hands came down to the ground and her feet went vertical, the cuffs of her jeans sliding up her skinny ankles a little. I clapped. ¡°Yay! Well done, Lacey. And did you practice with the hula hoop today?¡± ¡°Yep. I can do it for three minutes now,¡± she said, holding up four fingers. ¡°Aw, well¡ª¡± I reached out and pulled her close for a hug; her tiny arms wrapped my waist, her head sitting just under my ribs. ¡°Maybe you can show me when I come back from visiting with Max and Joshie.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± She pulled away and placed both hands behind her back, smiling up at me. She was the most adorable child out of this group¡ªher blond hair and bright smile lighting my every visit. ¡°Ara?¡± David said softly, closing the security gate behind himself and a sharp-faced man with dark, receding hair¡ªthe kind of man who looked like he¡¯d spent too long working in an office and not enough time in the sun, enjoying things, like a smile. ¡°Go play, Lacey,¡± I said softly, touching her shoulder. ¡°I¡¯ll come by later.¡± She toddled off and sat in the art corner beside her little friend. ¡°This is Ross Johnson,¡± David announced, and Ross offered his hand. ¡°He¡¯s come by to assess Charles.¡± ¡°Great.¡± I shook his hand and dropped it quickly, fighting the urge to wipe it on my jeans. ¡°I¡¯m sorry we had to call you in, but we can¡¯t really send our head psychologist in with Charles, because she¡¯s Lilithian.¡± ¡°Yes, I¡¯ve been made aware of the basics of the case. Now, I understand this is the second group of children to come through the House?¡± He motioned around the room. ¡°Yes,¡± I said, taking a half step away from the other children in the hopes Mr Johnson might follow. This wasn¡¯t really the place to discuss this. ¡°Over there we have Lacey and Harry, and the other two from this group were Charles and a three-year-old girl we¡¯ve named Sophie¡ªboth in the secure wing.¡± ¡°And what of the first group? Where are they now?¡± ¡°Four kids have been adopted out to loving Lilithian and vampire families, and it seems they¡¯re all doing remarkably well. The other two are in observation.¡± ¡°Right.¡± Ross typed something on his tablet, nodding as he did. ¡°Max and Josh, correct?¡± ¡°Yes,¡± I said, remembering back to the first day I came to the Damned House and saw Max playing in the sunbeams by the window. ¡°We¡¯d held high hopes for Max. But, at night, when we had no control over the sunlight, he¡¯d become monstrous and hard to handle.¡± ¡°Yes, we had to restrain him after he tore the hair from a little girl¡¯s scalp on his first night,¡± David said. ¡°He was just too traumatised, and it seemed the dark only aggravated his torment.¡± ¡°Right,¡± Mr Johnson said. ¡°And Katy, your head psychologist, mentioned that Charles and Sophie showed signs of dissociative personality disorders.¡± ¡°Yes, which may actually have been present before they were turned.¡± He wrote something else down, and I checked over my shoulder to see if Lacey and Harry were listening. ¡°Why don¡¯t we take this discussion into the secure section?¡± David suggested, winking at me. ¡°Yes, of course.¡± Mr Johnson looked up then at Harry and Lacey, realising finally that we weren¡¯t alone. ¡°Ara?¡± Harry called, holding up a large rectangle page. ¡°Look what I did.¡± I left David and Mr Johnson by the security door and wandered over to the art corner, my eyes going wider when I got a closer look at Harry¡¯s picture. ¡°I love this, Harry.¡± I squatted down and pointed to the house sitting under a sunny sky. ¡°You¡¯re using so many colours now. And, can you tell me¡ª¡± I aimed my finger to the red apples in the tree. ¡°What colour is this?¡± ¡°Um.¡± He considered the apple for a moment, scratching just beside his nose. ¡°Purple?¡± I looked over at David. His smile grew. ¡°Very close,¡± I said. ¡°But we call that one red.¡± ¡°Argh!¡± Harry folded over his page, slapping his brow. ¡°Stupid! Stupid! Stu¡ª¡± ¡°Hey,¡± David said gently, appearing suddenly beside Harry, gently taking both his hands. ¡°Do you want to know something, Harry?¡± Harry looked at David. He idolised his king and wanted to be just like King David when he grew up, which saddened my heart immensely, knowing the Damned might never actually grow up. But his love for David had allowed them a certain connection neither had with anyone else at the House, and David could always get through to him. ¡°When I was a little boy,¡± David started, ¡°I always got the colour red and purple mixed up. They look exactly the same, don¡¯t they?¡± His eyes slowly drifted onto mine, sparkling with a grin, asking me to play along. ¡°I¡¯m never gonna get this right,¡± Harry said, dropping his head between his hands. ¡°You will.¡± David lifted his face again. ¡°Because all you have to remember is that the colour red¡ª¡± He pointed to the apple, ¡°¡ªis the same colour as blood.¡± Harry sat up straight. ¡°And you like blood, don¡¯t you, Harry?¡± David finished. Harry nodded. ¡°Okay.¡± David stood up, tousling Harry¡¯s orange curls. ¡°And if you keep getting the colours wrong, guess what?¡± ¡°What?¡± Harry said. ¡°It¡¯s okay. No one¡¯s going to hurt you, son. We like it when someone makes a mistake around here because it means they¡¯ve got another chance to learn. And what do we get when we learn something?¡± Harry¡¯s eyes lit up. ¡°Chocolate!¡± ¡°Right.¡± David reached into his pocket and pulled out a Hershey¡¯s. ¡°Here you go, buddy. You learned that blood is red today, didn¡¯t you?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°Well, then you can have this.¡± ¡°Thank you, King David.¡± He jumped up and threw his arms around my husband. And my eyes watered. I loved seeing the children happy. It was just so easy to make them smile. All they wanted was a little love, a little encouragement, and when given anything¡ªdidn¡¯t matter if it was a flower from outside, a pin from my hair that one of them liked, or a new pack of pencils¡ªthey were just so grateful it was heartbreaking. David patted Harry¡¯s hair, holding back his own tears. ¡°Okay, see if you can draw me a picture of a puppy, and I¡¯ll come back after I¡¯ve taken Queen Ara to see Max and Joshie, okay?¡± Page 5 ¡°Okay.¡± Harry sat back down and tore open his chocolate bar, leaning in to share with Lacey.Advertisement ¡°Come, My Queen.¡± David draped his arm over my neck. ¡°I believe we¡¯re invisible in the presence of sweets.¡± My head turned as we walked away, my eyes staying on Harry long enough to see him enjoy his first bite. ¡°You¡¯re good with kids, David.¡± ¡°Kids are easy.¡± He waved a dismissive hand. ¡°Just feed them sugar and they love you.¡± I laughed. ¡°I¡¯m sure those principles will change when we have our own baby.¡± ¡°Of course.¡± He tugged me closer and kissed my hair. ¡°Because she won¡¯t be allowed any sweets.¡± ¡°Any?¡± ¡°No.¡± ¡°Why not?¡± ¡°If she¡¯s anything like her mother, no amount of sugar could possibly make her any sweeter.¡± ¡°Aw.¡± ¡°Charmed, I¡¯m sure,¡± Mr Johnson muttered flatly. David shook his head, ignoring it, for the most part, and keyed in the code to the security door. The tall, lanky boy with sandy-blonde hair stood up as we approached. Between us, a glass window sat as a divider from the hallway: a bullet proof, smash proof, and soundproof one that was mirrored on one side. Max couldn¡¯t see us, but we could see him. Josh, however, had the finely tuned instincts of an adult vampire, a very old adult vampire, turning his gaze directly on us before we even stopped walking. ¡°How is he?¡± David asked, and only then did I notice Katy had popped up beside him in her long white coat, clipboard in hand. ¡°He¡¯s showing progress, David. We closed the curtains today while he was playing in the sunlight, and he looked up, but he didn¡¯t screech or back into the corner this time.¡± David smiled, his eyes staying on Max. ¡°Jason asked to do one last session with him. What are your thoughts on this?¡± ¡°I have to say, I agree.¡± She took one step closer to the glass, her loving eyes on the two boys as if they were her own children¡ªthe very reason we hired her and made her immortal. ¡°He has no memory of his past before he came to the House, but he¡¯s showing signs of repression. I¡¯m worried it might all come back to him at once if we don¡¯t dot every ¡®I¡¯, so to speak.¡± ¡°And this present behaviour is what he commonly exhibits now?¡± Mr Johnson asked, peering into the room like Max was some science lab monkey. ¡°Yes.¡± She turned her head and smiled warmly at him. ¡°It¡¯s almost like he¡¯s a normal little boy.¡± ¡°And what about Joshua?¡± the stern man asked. Josh looked up again. There was no way he could hear us, but I got the sense that he just ¡®felt¡¯ us talking about him. ¡°We¡¯re looking at giving him a position in the Rehabilitation Organisation,¡± Katy said. ¡°Really?¡± I almost squealed. I¡¯d never even thought of that, but it just seemed like such a perfect position for Josh. ¡°I think he¡¯d make an excellent carer.¡± ¡°We think so too.¡± Katy nodded. ¡°He shows deep empathy and compassion with the children, and seems to have a good rapport with them, too, even with Charles and Sophie.¡± ¡°With Sophie?¡± I said slowly, my head reflexively angling toward the other two windows across the hallway. The lights were out in those rooms¡ªthe children preferring total darkness as they huddled in the corner, staring blankly at the walls. ¡°Yes. I watched him yesterday: he stood in front of the glass and placed his hand against it¡ª¡± She pointed to Charles¡¯ room. ¡°And Charles walked over, slowly, at first. But then, he placed his hand against Josh¡¯s.¡± David and I looked at each other then back at Joshua, while Mr Johnson took more notes. ¡°Does Josh want to be adopted when we find a family to take Max?¡± I asked. ¡°Yes. He¡¯ll stay here in the Organisation¡¯s employ until such a time.¡± I nodded. ¡°And Max?¡± ¡°We¡¯re predicting another few weeks of counselling and training, but if Mr Johnson concurs¡ª¡± She presented him. ¡°We¡¯ll move Max back into the House next week.¡± I thought about Lacy and Harry. ¡°Are you sure he¡¯s stable enough?¡± ¡°I wouldn¡¯t move him if I thought otherwise,¡± she said reassuringly. ¡°I love those kids as much as you do, My Queen. I¡¯d never put them in jeopardy.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I clasped my hands and took a look around. ¡°You¡¯ve done really well here, Katy.¡± ¡°No.¡± She smiled, looking in on Max again. ¡°I think we all have.¡± The gentle hum of David¡¯s lungs expanding took my mind from thoughts of the day ahead to a peaceful state of sleep. The silence in the cavity where a heart should beat, and the warmth of his arms around me after my blood had fuelled his body, were two of the things I would never take for granted¡ªhaving spent too many nights just trying to imagine what it felt like to lay this way with him again. But, despite the tight embrace I fell asleep in, as my mind rose from deep REM, I suddenly felt too much space around me. I opened my eyes and blinked until the blur wrapped the corners and the featureless walls of a dark room¡ªthe space decked out with a single bed, a table and a lamp, with curtains hanging over what victims who came here would assume was a window. It wasn¡¯t. This room was designed to contain the screeching terror they¡¯d express when they realised this would be the last room they¡¯d ever see. But the cement walls and iron door couldn¡¯t lock away the screams of the past. I could still hear them¡ªhear every cry ever muttered, every whimper and every plea. The quiet prayers for mercy were embedded in the bloodstains on the walls¡ªdeaths by the hundreds having occurred in the one tiny space. And there were twenty more rooms like this, each one authorised by signature of the queen. With Loslilian being so far away from towns or cities, we¡¯d approved for the vampires residing here to have their particular dietary needs shipped in, provided they disposed of the bodies thoughtfully and quickly, keeping all kills discreet and private. But, unless I¡¯d been typeset on the menu as ¡®meal of the day,¡¯ I really had no reason to be down here. I sat up fully and tucked my legs to my chest. The iron door was closed, probably locked, making the room as dark as it was cold. I always imagined these rooms were a little more inviting, maybe pleasant. But, then, how was a room of death supposed to feel? Being immortal hadn¡¯t made accepting the death of humans any easier, and that was precisely why I had never come down here. ¡°Hello?¡± I called, but it seemed like everyone had gone to bed. Except for the shapeless figure I spotted in the corner. I held my breath, waiting for it to move¡ªpraying to God it wasn¡¯t a dead body. Not that a dead body would move, but . . . you know what I mean. It¡¯d be pretty darn scary if it did. My life story had gone from normal to vampire in just a few weeks, and I wasn¡¯t about to start adding zombies. ¡°Hello?¡± I said again, this time a little quieter. And the figure moved¡ªjust once, just a breath taken and held, then, it turned its head and looked my way. I pressed my back to the wall, making myself smaller. ¡°Who¡¯s there?¡± it said, easing my rapid pulse. ¡°Jason.¡± I exhaled his name. His eyes narrowed, searching the wall, his gaze sweeping past me several times. He shook his head at himself then and turned away. ¡°Please?¡± a small voice muttered. My eyes focused on a balled-up shape between him and the wall¡ªits skin reeking with the sweat of fear. ¡°Please, don¡¯t hurt me,¡± she said. ¡°Shh.¡± Jason squatted down, brushing her thick, dark hair off her face. ¡°I promise, no harm will come to you.¡± ¡°What do you want with me then?¡± ¡°Nothing you can¡¯t handle.¡± ¡°Where am I?¡± she said, her voice calming a little under Jason¡¯s spell. ¡°Where¡¯s Jeff?¡± The vampire looked off to one side. ¡°He¡¯s . . . at peace now.¡± ¡°What?¡± Her eyes went wide enough that I could suddenly see the whites. ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°He¡¯s taking a walk through Purgatory,¡± Jason said, cupping her ponytail. ¡°He¡¯s looking for you there.¡± ¡°What are you doing?¡± Her voice quivered. ¡°I¡¯m not going to hurt you.¡± He yanked her hair, angling her head sideways to lengthen her neck. ¡°I¡¯m just going to kill you.¡± A scream split the seconds into minutes, the realisation of her own death sinking in only as Jason¡¯s teeth did, breaking her skin and severing the windpipe until the cry became nothing but a gurgled whimper. The thick, warm scent of blood filled the air, burning my nose and throat. I rolled onto my hands and knees and pressed my wrist to my nose, heaving. If this was a dream, it was an awfully real, awfully vivid one. I could smell the dirt on the floors, feel the chill of death fog the wintry air; hear her screams like they were right in front of me. But it didn¡¯t fit¡ªJason didn¡¯t look right in here¡ªkilling that way. I always imagined him to be the compassionate kind of killer¡ªone who¡¯d make love to his victims and kill them gently, so they didn¡¯t know. I just never pictured him as an attack killer. But, for some reason, I found it oddly sexy¡ªin a very twisted, vampirish kind of way. ¡°Right. That thought just crossed the line, Ara-Rose,¡± I said, pinching myself. ¡°Wake up.¡± ¡°Ara?¡± Jase stood suddenly, his arms falling by his sides as he slowly turned at the shoulders. ¡°In the flesh,¡± I muttered awkwardly, sinking my neck into my shoulders. He checked all four corners of the room, his brow furrowed. ¡°Ar? You here?¡± ¡°Over here, dummy.¡± I laughed. He walked slowly toward me, his eyes small. ¡°Is . . . is that you?¡± ¡°Of course it¡¯s me,¡± I said, but as I went to slap him, my hand went right through his. ¡°Whoa.¡± He stepped closer, the green in his wondering eyes reflecting the glowing orb of blue he was staring at. ¡°Look at you, pretty girl. So lovely in blue.¡± I looked down at my own hands, seeing them as ghostly fog. ¡°What¡¯s happening, Jase?¡± ¡°You¡¯re dreaming.¡± I waved my hands through the chilly air. ¡°Some dream, huh? It feels so real.¡± He glanced back at his kill, echoes of her screams shadowing his eyes, and humbly lowered his head. ¡°You were never supposed to see me like that.¡± ¡°Like what?¡± He exhaled, wiping his wrist across his bloodied mouth. ¡°Like a killer.¡± ¡°You weren¡¯t that bad. Besides. . .¡± I looked over at the limp girl. ¡°This is only a dream. You don¡¯t really kill like that, right?¡± Page 6 His jaw went tight. ¡°What if I did?¡±Advertisement ¡°What if you did?¡± I repeated playfully. ¡°Would you hate me?¡± I laughed, rolling my head back. ¡°No. Silly.¡± ¡°Really?¡± ¡°Why would I? I know what you are¡ªI always have.¡± He scratched his head and looked down at his shoes, taking a sharp breath through his teeth. ¡°Then, I uh¡ªI better tell you. . .¡± ¡°This . . . isn¡¯t a dream, is it?¡± ¡°No.¡± He shrunk into himself a little, as if my hand were waiting in the air with a giant slap at the ready. ¡°You¡¯re outside your body right now.¡± ¡°I am?¡± I looked at my hands again. ¡°Yes. You¡¯re . . . you¡¯re a wandering soul. You don¡¯t even have a face.¡± I touched my face. ¡°Freaky. So, what do I look like?¡± ¡°Blue light.¡± ¡°Really? ¡®Cause I look pretty normal to me. Just kind of see-through.¡± ¡°Like a ghost?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I looked back up at Jason, but his eyes kept flicking over my entire body, not really fixing my gaze like they normally did. ¡°But I feel normal.¡± ¡°I know.¡± He smiled at me. ¡°But I really wish you hadn¡¯t ended up down here.¡± We both glanced slowly at the dead girl. ¡°I¡¯m really not that sensitive anymore, Jase.¡± ¡°Still. . .¡± he said, and left it hanging, switching again to the light, carefree Jase I loved so much. ¡°Why do you always end up with me when you escape your body?¡± ¡°Didn¡¯t know I did.¡± ¡°Well. . .¡± He looked down at his shoes, stuffing both hands in his pockets. ¡°You do.¡± I shrugged, but he wouldn¡¯t have seen it as a shrug. ¡°Guess I just miss you.¡± ¡°Yeah, I miss you too, little glow bug.¡± He reached out and brushed his hand affectionately through my arm; it felt warm and tingly, kind of like standing right next to the air vent on a heater. ¡°But you better get back, your colour¡¯s fading, and I have a body to dispose of.¡± ¡°Okay then.¡± I nodded, peeling my eyes away from the thumb he aimed at his kill. ¡°I¡¯ll come see you later. I wanna talk more about this.¡± ¡°You won¡¯t remember it,¡± he said factually, turning away. ¡°I won¡¯t?¡± ¡°Nope.¡± He bent down and looped the dead girl¡¯s arm over his neck. ¡°You never do.¡± What David and I had done in this bed with each other over the past few weeks had surely ruined Arthur¡¯s turkey baster plan. I¡¯d held off as long as I could, but couldn¡¯t exactly tell my husband I didn¡¯t want to have sex with him in case I fell pregnant and ruined his uncle¡¯s and my plan to save him from certain death. So, I let him have me last night, all of me, and prayed now, as I laid here in his sleeping arms, that we hadn¡¯t conceived. I wished it didn¡¯t matter. I wished I could imagine his life force moving through me, inside me, electrifying things to existence within my body. I wished I could cup my hand over my belly and imagine the colour of her hair, or if she¡¯d have his eyes or mine. What kind of smile she¡¯d have, whose temperament she¡¯d have. But all of those dreams belonged to normal people¡ªto people who were human and not immortal weapons, whose vampire-hunting child was foretold to be powerful enough that one of the oldest immortals in the world wanted her dead before she could even say her first word. ¡°Morning,¡± David said sleepily, and all my thoughts halted, my hand falling away from my belly. ¡°Hey.¡± I rolled slightly to look up at him; his stubble had grown in thicker overnight, making him look gruff and sexy, covering his dimple just enough that it looked like a ditch in the ground covered by grown-in grass. And under his thick, dark brows, pulled together slightly as he studied my eyes, those shining green emeralds stood out, brightening my day. ¡°I love the feel of your hand on my back first thing in the morning.¡± ¡°Is that so?¡± He spread his fingers wider, waking each inch of my skin he touched, firmly cupping my hip and moving his fingertips just into the rim of my underwear, a naughty millimetre away from my butt-crack. ¡°And I love feeling you in my hands first thing in the morning,¡± he added. I giggled, pressing my head into his kiss. ¡°Woke up on the right side of bed today, huh?¡± ¡°When I wake with you snuggled into me like this.¡± He squeezed me. ¡°I can¡¯t possibly wake in a bad mood.¡± ¡°Well, you¡¯ve woken up late today.¡± I patted his chest and pushed off it gently to sit, tucking my legs to one side. ¡°Breakfast is in ten minutes.¡± He rolled onto his side, his body going long as he grabbed his watch off the nightstand and checked it. ¡°Lucky I¡¯m a speedy vampire and can break records for getting showered and dressed.¡± I copied his lively smirk. ¡°Yes, but it¡¯s a pity you¡¯re not the king and can just decide breakfast isn¡¯t all that important today.¡± ¡°And what, pray tell, is more important than dining in community with our people?¡± I moved one shoulder up shyly to my ear, and David¡¯s smile spread across his face, his white fangs gleaming in the early light, warming my blood with a pang of hunger. But not hunger for the kind of food we¡¯d have in the Great Hall. ¡°You, my girl¡ª¡± He cupped my chin and slid his thumb down it, ¡°¡ªare insatiable.¡± ¡°But, insatiable and still bound to my queenly duties, right?¡± I said, knowing he was about to throw the covers back and get up to break that record. ¡°Just as I am bound as king.¡± He winked, and disappeared behind the bathroom door, leaving my bed empty, aside from the mound of proverbial duty I couldn¡¯t escape. I¡¯d not heard a guitar being played in so long I couldn¡¯t remember the last time. And I knew David¡¯s style, knew before I even heard his voice rising above it that he was playing. But I wasn¡¯t exactly sure who the second guitarist was. I wandered down the stairs to the Great Hall and crossed the room, hugging myself. The dining table was empty now, all the breakfast dishes removed and the people disbursed, but a small group was still lingering, settled on chairs in a disorderly circle beside the fireplace under the great picture of Lilith. David smiled up at me, and I stopped dead, my jaw dropping when I saw Jason sitting beside the king, the two of them in white T-shirts and dark jeans, entertaining the staff with their musical talents. They were actually laughing and joking with each other, the air around them charged with a very radiant kind of energy. And it seemed that, when it came to me, those two could tear each other¡¯s throats out, however, take me out of the picture, and it was as if no conflict had ever arisen between them. Which, I guess, was the way they had to be after a hundred-and-twenty years under the same roof. It kind of made me feel bad for coming between them. ¡°Okay,¡± David said, tuning the E string. ¡°Let¡¯s try some Jeff Buckley.¡± ¡°Fine, but I¡¯m singing this time.¡± Jason elbowed his brother. ¡°Otherwise we¡¯ll get a pack of curious cats in here wondering what all the crying¡¯s about.¡± David reached out and flicked Jason playfully across the back of his head. ¡°Right. Let¡¯s do this.¡± Jason strummed once, getting a nod of approval from David, then started plucking the strings. I leaned my butt against the dining table, keeping my arms folded, trying my hardest to hold the grin back. I always knew David could sing, but Jason was right¡ªnot about David sounding like a dying cat, but that he was a little better. Jason had a better mid-range and his voice flowed easily from chest to falsetto. David had a more gruff, kind of sexy voice. Both of them great, but also surprisingly different. The staff sang along with Jason, clapping and dancing, united as equals for this small moment in time. Right now, David was not their king, and Jason was just his brother¡ªthe past we all shared just an inconsequential thing that happened once. The song ended to a round of applause, David and Jason taking overly theatrical bows. ¡°Thanks, folks, we¡¯ll be here all week.¡± David placed his guitar in its case. ¡°Thank you,¡± Jason said quietly to a maid who took his guitar for him. ¡°Good to see you two getting along.¡± I clapped a few times as I walked over. Both boys stood, and the staff quietly went back to work, tidying the chairs before they left. ¡°It happens from time to time,¡± David said, kissing my cheek. ¡°Yeah, when there aren¡¯t any girls to come between us,¡± Jason added lightly, winking at me. ¡°Well, it¡¯s nice to see.¡± I rolled myself into David¡¯s embrace, wrapping my arms all the way around his chest. I knew that scene¡ªseeing the boys play guitar together like that¡ªwould stay in my memory forever: a rare file in the ¡®happy memory¡¯ column. ¡°Speaking of see, have you guys seen Em or Morg? I¡¯m supposed to have another politics and boring stuff lesson today,¡± I added. ¡°Nope,¡± David said, breaking away to close his guitar case. ¡°But if you find one you find the other.¡± ¡°Yeah, they¡¯re pretty much glued at the hip, aren¡¯t they?¡± Jason picked up his guitar case. ¡°You mean fused.¡± David laughed, snapping his locks closed. ¡°I think Mike¡¯s got cause to worry there.¡± ¡°Why?¡± I asked, sitting on the last remaining chair. Jason and David looked at each other then at me. ¡°Why?¡± I repeated. ¡°You know what girls are like,¡± David said. ¡°Uh, no.¡± I blinked a few more times than necessary. ¡°I don¡¯t.¡± ¡°Once they get talking, a relationship problem becomes gossip, girls unite, and then a simple mistake sees us guys in the dog house,¡± Jason added. ¡°Relationship problem?¡± I stood up. ¡°Who¡¯s having problems?¡± ¡°Em and Mike,¡± Jason said. David glared at him before looking at me. ¡°That¡¯s her business, Ara. Don¡¯t get involved.¡± ¡°How can I not? Mike and Em are my best friends, David.¡± ¡°I know.¡± He touched my shoulder and leaned in to kiss my cheek again, maybe marking me in some immature display of ownership. ¡°But it¡¯s not our place to interfere. We¡¯re not in their relationship, so we can¡¯t pass judgement.¡± ¡°Who¡¯s passing anything?¡± I said. ¡°I¡¯m more worried about what Morg¡¯s saying to Em. I think she has thing for Mike. What if she¡¯s advising Emily out of the relationship?¡± Jason gave David a smug grin. ¡°Told ya.¡± I looked at David. ¡°Told you what?¡± ¡°I told him you wouldn¡¯t get caught up in the drama of it all.¡± Jason stuffed his capo in his back pocket. ¡°We¡¯re worried about the same thing.¡± Page 7 ¡°Then I should go find them,¡± I decided.Advertisement ¡°Okay.¡± David grabbed his guitar case. ¡°Just . . . Remain objective, okay? Don¡¯t listen to too much of what Em says about Mike. You know what he¡¯s like.¡± I nodded. ¡°I know he loves her. I know he¡¯s. . .¡± I thought about it, having a laugh to myself for a second, ¡°¡ªdownright stupid when it comes to girls sometimes, but I¡¯ve also known him longer than she has. She can¡¯t badmouth him in front of me, I won¡¯t let her.¡± ¡°Good.¡± David nodded. ¡°Because that kind of chatter is infectious. Before you know it, an argument she had with Mike will become a full-scale cause for hatred. Don¡¯t let Morg get inside her head.¡± ¡°Yeah, she¡¯s good at that,¡± Jason added, and both boys walked away, side by side. ¡°Hey, what¡¯re you guys doing?¡± I asked, catching them on the stairs. ¡°Sleepover,¡± Emily said. ¡°Sleepover?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± Morgaine stepped past Emily. ¡°Mike and Em had a fight. She doesn''t want to sleep in the same room.¡± I noticed Em¡¯s red eyes then. ¡°Are you okay, Em?¡± ¡°Yeah,¡± she said, her voice still shaky. ¡°I just¡­you know what he¡¯s like.¡± ¡°Um, no.¡± I frowned. ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°He just doesn''t get it.¡± ¡°Ara won''t either, Em.¡± Morgaine wrapped her arm around Emily. ¡°She''s his best friend.¡± ¡°Try me,¡± I said. ¡°He doesn''t listen to me,¡± she started, and it all came pouring out with tears. ¡°He doesn''t understand what I''m trying to say. He thinks I''m being needy and bitter, when all I want is for him to want to spend time with me. That''s all. I just want him to want to. He doesn¡¯t even have to, that¡¯s not what I¡¯m after, you know. And I know he doesn''t have time, but¡­it¡¯s just, maybe if he¡¯d meet with me for a coffee every morning, or even invite me, or maybe if he¡¯d spent time with me last night instead of going fishing with the boys, then I wouldn¡¯t be so upset. I don¡¯t want all his time¡­¡± She took a few jagged breaths. ¡°I just want him to want to be with me, even though he can¡¯t.¡± ¡°How do you know he doesn¡¯t want that?¡± I asked. Emily wiped her cheeks, angling her face away from me. ¡°He doesn¡¯t show it.¡± I sighed, dropping my arms. ¡°For what it¡¯s worth, Em, I do understand. And I also understand why Mike doesn''t understand how you feel.¡± ¡°Why?¡± she asked. ¡°He¡¯s just¡­that''s just how he always was with girls, before he and I were together.¡± ¡°But I''m not just some girl. I''m his fianc¨¦.¡± She held up her ring hand. I shrugged. If she thought she would be any different, she was kidding herself. She knew Mike only for the curse-captured, obsessed version of himself he was with me. But that just wasn¡¯t who he was. Morgaine hugged Emily close, rubbing her back. ¡°Where¡¯s David, Ara?¡± ¡°Um, he¡¯s on the phone to National Security, dealing with some human issue.¡± ¡°Well, come on then.¡± She grabbed my hand, keeping an arm around Em. ¡°You¡¯re having a sleepover with us.¡± ¡°Okay,¡± I said. ¡°But no scary movies.¡± Emily and Morg exchanged grins. ¡°Knock, knock,¡± David said softly, peering into the dark room. ¡°Shh.¡± Morg scowled at him. He pretended to zip his lips, then tiptoed in slowly and crawled onto the bed between Emily and I. ¡°What are you doing here?¡± I whispered. ¡°Missed you.¡± I reached down and linked my fingers through his, cupping my other hand over his wrist. ¡°What are we watching?¡± he asked. ¡°Shh.¡± Em jammed her elbow in his ribs. ¡°Ow.¡± He laughed and poked her back. ¡°Chick flick,¡± I whispered. He turned his head to look at Emily, then Morg, and laughed quietly, swiping a tear from Em¡¯s cheek. ¡°Sad movie?¡± ¡°Shut up,¡± Emily said. ¡°Just because you lack the ability to show any human emotion.¡± ¡°I''m beginning to see why I stopped in the first place,¡± he said playfully, then wrapped his other arm over Emily¡¯s shoulder and pulled her ear to his lips. ¡°What happened?¡± I was about to fill him in on the plot line, when Emily¡¯s lip trembled, and I realised quickly that he wasn¡¯t referring to the film. My gaze went back to the TV set. I knew anything she had to say would be said in thought¡ªnot for my ears, clearly. She was so upset tonight, which could only mean there was more to this story than she¡¯d said. But, of course, she wasn¡¯t about to badmouth Mike with me in the room. I think she knew, deep down inside, which side I¡¯d take. But she was kidding herself to think David would side with her, either; he and Mike were two peas in a pod. ¡°I¡¯ll talk to him for you,¡± David said in that deep, whispery tone. She shook her head. ¡°Don''t bother. I''m not sure I care anymore.¡± ¡°Of course you do, or you wouldn¡¯t be crying.¡± ¡°This would be so much sadder if they were vampires, not humans,¡± Morg cut in, her mouth full of popcorn. ¡°Just pretend they are,¡± I said. ¡°You¡¯re not crying, Ara,¡± David stated, removing his arm from around Emily. ¡°You always cry in these movies.¡± ¡°Guess I''ve done my fair share of crying for the next decade or so.¡± He sat forward and looked at my face, sinking back again with a sigh. ¡°I''m sorry.¡± ¡°What are you sorry for?¡± ¡°Just¡­¡± He scratched his chin, leaving his hand just under it for a second after. ¡°I just wish I¡¯d taken better care of you.¡± My words were lost, and I think Morg and Em were so shocked by it, even they held their breath. I felt the awkwardness saturate the air then, as both girls slowly turned back to watch the movie, and David looked on with a certain amount of trouble behind that gaze. He wasn''t watching the movie at all; he was lost in whatever picture of the past he¡¯d just apologised for. But we all looked up, Morg pausing the film, when a loud rap came down on her door, and before she even got off the bed, the tension rose in the room with the scent of Mike outside. ¡°Hey,¡± Morg said, opening the door only a crack. ¡°Hey.¡± Mike¡¯s arm appeared on the doorframe above Morg¡¯s head. ¡°You got a sec?¡± ¡°Uh, I¡¯ve got¡­company,¡± she said, opening the door. Mike¡¯s mouth popped open a little. ¡°Em, there you are. I was wondering where you¡¯d got to.¡± She looked into her lap. I leaned over and whispered in Em¡¯s ear, ¡°What¡¯s he doing here if he¡¯s not here to see you?¡± ¡°You¡¯re welcome to join us.¡± Morg¡¯s voice rose over mine in an obvious attempt to shut me up. ¡°No, he''s not,¡± Emily said, coldly. ¡°Aw, Em, come on.¡± Mike took a step into the room. ¡°Don''t be like that, you know I¡ª¡± ¡°Mike, just go, please,¡± she said, holding a hand up. ¡°You¡¯re serious?¡± She nodded. ¡°Why? What did I do?¡± Morg, Emily and I huffed loudly. Mike stopped walking, looked at David, then me, then Morg, and turned around, leaving the icy welcome behind. ¡°Just give it time, Em,¡± David said as Morg closed the door. ¡°He¡¯s got a lot going on.¡± ¡°I know.¡± The tension in her shoulders eased with David¡¯s fingers softly tangling in her hair, rolling her head toward his lap. ¡°I¡¯m just not sure I can always wait for him to care.¡± I placed my hand over David''s for a second, then stroked Emily¡¯s forehead. ¡°We¡¯re here for you, Em. Okay. You can come move into my room if you want.¡± She laughed softly, closing her eyes. ¡°It¡¯ll be okay. We just need a break.¡± ¡°A break?¡± I said. She nodded. ¡°I think he needs to lose me to know what it¡¯s like to miss me.¡± David looked up from Emily, the deep concern remaining in his eyes. He really cared about her, and I always knew that, but now I could really see it too¡ªcould really see the connection they¡¯d formed through months being alone together, sharing blood. And he thought nothing of the fact that she was lying in his lap, her lips just inches away from a place only I should go. But it didn''t feel as wrong as it should. It felt like . . . I don¡¯t know, maybe like they had some deeper, untainted connection. Morgaine sat on the chair again, leaning forward a little as though she was listening to me whisper a secret across the room. I¡¯d seen her do that before, when she was trying to get a feel for a situation, so I gave her a soft smile, which she returned. ¡°We ready watch the movie again?¡± ¡°Ready,¡± David whispered. Morg pressed play on the remote, then came to snuggle up behind Em, her head on David¡¯s shoulder like he was some Universal Pillow. He¡¯d been a part of each of our lives once¡ªin some way deeper than friendship¡ªand we all owned some small claim to him. He wasn''t bothered by the closeness or affection of Em and Morg, and he didn''t even seem to notice it bothered me, which probably meant I was looking into it too deeply. So, I rested my head on Emily¡¯s, and fell asleep with David stroking my hair. Despite falling asleep in Morgaine''s bed last night, David tucked tightly between me and Emily, I woke in my own bed, with a pair of radiant green eyes smiling down from the vampire standing above me. ¡°What¡¯s this?¡± I sat up. ¡°Something you haven¡¯t had for a while.¡± My eyes wound around the cup in his hand, steam rising from the contents, the warm smell of sweet coffee waking my mind. ¡°You made me a coffee.¡± ¡°Only the best for my girl.¡± He sat beside me. ¡°Did you sleep better last night?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I rubbed my head with one hand, taking the cup with the other. ¡°I didn''t even dream.¡± ¡°I know.¡± He smirked. ¡°How do you know?¡± I studied him, pausing a sip away from tasting the first David-made coffee I¡¯d had in what felt like forever. ¡°What did you do?¡± He stared at the bed sheets, as if he didn''t want to tell me, but the smile tugging his lips indicated that it wasn¡¯t for any strange reason. ¡°I put you to sleep.¡± ¡°What, like you used to when I was human?¡± He nodded, the grin growing. ¡°It seems that, with the power of a king, everything I could do to you before you became immortal, I can do again.¡± Page 8 ¡°Well, so, are you as powerful as Jason now?¡± ¡°No. My telekinesis is very limited, and I struggle to read the projected thoughts of a stronger vampire, like Mike, but I¡¯m sure, with time, that will change.¡±Advertisement My mouth dropped. I hadn¡¯t expected him to tell me he could do that. ¡°You can read anyone¡¯s projected thoughts?¡± His secret smile slipped across his lips. ¡°Like you didn¡¯t already know.¡± I sipped my coffee as a distraction, swallowing before saying, ¡°Okay. Maybe I was a little suspicious.¡± He exhaled. ¡°Why didn¡¯t you just ask me about it then?¡± My lips stopped short of their next sip. ¡°I. . .¡± ¡°Let me guess,¡± David said, sliding his arm between my neck and the pillow, cuddling me close. ¡°You didn¡¯t even think of it.¡± ¡°It¡¯s not that, David.¡± I sipped the coffee again. ¡°It¡¯s more like I just figured you¡¯d lie to me, or. . .¡± ¡°Or?¡± ¡°Or ask me why I was curious.¡± His spine straightened a little. I was sure he already knew how my curiosities came about¡ªby talking with Jason¡ªbut he didn¡¯t want to hear me say it. ¡°Can. . .¡± And here was something I wasn¡¯t sure I wanted to know, but kind of needed to. ¡°Can you read unfiltered thoughts yet?¡± ¡°On demand, do you mean?¡± ¡°Yeah. I . . . I know you could do it randomly for a few days after the coronation, but, has that changed?¡± The birds outside sang a song to fill the silence, and the gentle breeze moved the still air. David took a slow breath, his eyes switching from thought to humour and back again. ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Yes, what?¡± ¡°Yes. I can read unguarded, un-projected thoughts again, but¡ª¡± he said, but ended it there. ¡°But?¡± ¡°But . . . not always, and . . . it¡¯s only yours so far.¡± ¡°Mine?¡± I sat up a little more, balancing the cup in hand so as not to spill the contents. ¡°Why only mine? Am I weak?¡± ¡°Is Emily weak?¡± He grinned. ¡°I can read hers.¡± Hmpf. I turned my head quickly and sipped my coffee, focusing on the liquid. He just laughed. ¡°I love your jealousy.¡± I half smiled into my cup. I knew what he meant, because I loved his jealousy too¡ªthe way any mention of Jason made his blood change temperature. ¡°Can you read Jason¡¯s mind?¡± He cleared his throat, sitting back a little. ¡°No.¡± ¡°Can he still read yours?¡± The conversation had clearly gone sour. ¡°Yes.¡± My smile widened. ¡°I love your jealousy.¡± ¡°I, My Queen, do not need to be jealous of my brother.¡± He took my cup and pushed me gently backward on the bed, a playful grin sweeping the anger from his eyes. ¡°I have you. I married you, and I will never need to play against him for your heart.¡± I touched his face, looking from his lips to his eyes. So many words came to my tongue, ready to roll off, tell him how right he was, but that sinking feeling¡ªthe one like I¡¯d forgotten a child in the car on a hot day at a supermarket¡ªroiled up inside me. My eyes became smaller, focusing on it. I¡¯d forgotten something. I just knew it. And whatever it was, I needed to remember, because whatever it was, I was sure now, had something to do with Jase. ¡°Where do you go?¡± he said with wonder, his eyes searching my face. ¡°I wish I could read your mind as easily as I used to. I miss knowing everything you''re wondering and dreaming.¡± I let my legs fall softly apart as his weight came down to rest between them. ¡°I miss it, too. Miss everything about being human.¡± ¡°Really?¡± He looked at my lips, his lovely dimple pressing into his cheek. ¡°Because I can think of one thing you don''t miss.¡± ¡°What¡¯s that?¡± ¡°This.¡± He rolled the tip of his thumb past his index finger, tearing it open, and wiped the warm, sweet liquid across my lips. My tongue moved involuntarily, stealing the blood for itself, sending it down to the back of my throat. And that was it. I had to have more. David laughed as I rolled up and flipped him onto his back, landing on his hips like a cowgirl. ¡°You¡¯re right. I miss being human. I miss the sweetness, the, I don''t know, the innocence of our love back then, but I like this much better,¡± I said, driving my pelvis down hard on his¡­zipper. ¡°And you do realise I''m so hungry right now I could drain you dry?¡± ¡°Go ahead, succubus.¡± He grinned. ¡°And I¡¯ll flip you over after and take it all back.¡± ¡°Is that a threat or a promise?¡± I squealed, suddenly moving through the air, landing on my back with the pillows rising up around my ears, and David''s jeans scraping roughly against my bare upper thighs. ¡°It¡¯s a promise.¡± ¡°Then, in that case¡ª¡± I thumbed a button undone on his shirt and traced my finger down his flesh from his throat to his sternum. ¡°Come closer so I can bite you.¡± Chapter Three I came over the hill, the midday sun bright and yellow above me, glaring in my eyes enough that as I set my gaze down on the basketball court, I could swear I saw Mike holding a child up to the hoop. ¡°Mike.¡± He bent down, then tossed his hand in the air, waving it once. ¡°Hey, Ara.¡± ¡°Hey, what you do¡ª¡± ¡°This is Will,¡± he cut in, presenting a small, blond-haired boy. ¡°He¡¯s new.¡± I stopped dead halfway down the hill. ¡°Yes, we met yesterday.¡± Mike smiled at the kid. ¡°I¡¯ll just walk ¡®im back inside. Two secs, ¡®kay?¡± ¡°Sure,¡± I said chirpily, but my bones wouldn¡¯t move. Who on Earth authorised him to take the Damned outside? I mean, what if Will tried to escape? He could end up in all kinds of terrible places. Mike walked the boy back toward the house, his hand on his shoulder, both of them talking animatedly, like they were best buddies. I almost didn¡¯t recognise my ¡®mature¡¯ best friend and Chief of Security anymore. He even dressed differently when he came to see the Dammed¡ªalways in jeans and a light coloured T-shirt, usually wearing a baseball cap, too. And I kinda liked him this way. He was Fun Mike. Guy-I-grew-up-with Mike. I reached the base of the hill as Mike broke into a light jog back in my direction, bending to scoop the basketball off the ground as he approached. ¡°Hey, baby.¡± ¡°Hey. Letting the Damned out now, huh?¡± He smirked at the quaver in my voice. ¡°Yeah. Who''d have thought blood-hungry kids could get a release of energy from playing outdoors?¡± ¡°And . . . who, exactly, approved this?¡± ¡°David.¡± He stood taller, clearly ready for a challenge. ¡°But not without supervision, and only one at a time.¡± ¡°But¡ª¡± ¡°But nothing, Ara. Those kids,¡± he pointed to the house, ¡°for the most part, are normal. You can¡¯t keep them locked away for the rest of their lives¡ª¡± ¡°But, I¡¯m the one who¡ª¡± ¡°Even if the conditions are pleasant,¡± he finished. ¡°You don¡¯t have to agree, Ara, but you¡ª¡± ¡°Mike.¡± I put my hands up. ¡°I agree, okay. I was just. . .¡± He smiled sheepishly. ¡°Surprised.¡± ¡°Yeah. I didn¡¯t mean to start an argument. I think it¡¯s great they¡¯re going outside.¡± I glanced over at the house to see all the little faces watching Mike and I through the window. ¡°It¡¯s just that no one told me.¡± ¡°Didn¡¯t David?¡± Mike jumped up to dunk the ball in the hoop. ¡°Nope.¡± I strolled over and caught it on the rebound. ¡°He told me we had a new group, and mentioned something about education, but¡ª¡± ¡°Did he tell you we decided not to feed them Pure Blood?¡± I frowned, searching my brain for that conversation, but it¡¯d never happened. ¡°No. Why¡¯s that?¡± ¡°For one, they¡¯ve all been rejecting it, and¡ª¡± ¡°I know that. But, we were just gonna keep trying in the hopes¡ª¡± ¡°It isn¡¯t enough for them, Ar. Think of them as concentrated versions of vampires¡ªthey need more blood than an adult.¡± He stole the ball from my hands. ¡°Kind of like when vampires get hurt and need human blood because ours isn¡¯t strong enough then, either.¡± ¡°And, what were the other reasons you decided against giving them our blood?¡± ¡°We don¡¯t want them immune to Pure Blood venom.¡± He threw the ball into the hoop, ignoring my sudden gasp. ¡°We left it that way in case you never find a cure for vampirism.¡± ¡°So, you''re just going to kill them if I can¡¯t change them back?¡± Mike took a deep breath. ¡°We may have no choice. They can¡¯t stay that way for eternity.¡± ¡°Mike! That¡¯s horrible.¡± ¡°I know. But it won¡¯t come to that. Besides,¡± he said, dribbling the ball, ¡°we¡¯re also leaving things open in case one of them wants to die.¡± ¡°You''re giving them the option?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°They''re children, they can¡¯t make that kind of choice.¡± ¡°Ara, those kids are older than you.¡± ¡°Not in human years.¡± I stole the ball. ¡°Yes, but they mature with experience and age, just like we do.¡± He reached across and snatched it from my hands, throwing me a vehement glare with just a hint of a smile underneath. ¡°Their minds aren¡¯t locked in childhood at all, like vampires first thought. And¡ª¡± ¡°I know,¡± I cut in. ¡°I¡¯ve seen them learn, show reason, integrity, wisdom, even. But I don¡¯t like the idea of giving them the option of suicide.¡± ¡°Freedom, you mean.¡± He turned away and threw the ball toward the hoop. ¡°Huh?¡± ¡°Freedom. It¡¯s not the option of suicide, Ara. It¡¯s the freedom to choose an immortal life or a peaceful death.¡± I studied him carefully for a second before he broke the stare and wandered over to grab the ball from across the court. He was serious about this stuff. I¡¯d never seen him get so . . . red in the face, over any topic. ¡°Why does it matter to you so much, Mike¡ªwhether they live or die?¡± ¡°It¡¯s not that.¡± He tossed the ball to me; I caught it. ¡°It¡¯s . . . I don¡¯t know.¡± I hid my smile with the turn of my back, and aimed the orange ball to the sky, throwing it but missing my target. ¡°You come here every day, don''t you?¡± ¡°Yeah. Why?¡± ¡°Oh, no reason.¡± I folded my arms, squinting up at him. ¡°One might just think you were starting to like those kids.¡± Page 9 He smiled bashfully, jamming his hands in his pockets, but it slipped away as he looked at his feet. ¡°So what was the deal with you lot last night?¡±Advertisement ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°I had coffee with Morg this morning. She told me you all fell asleep on David.¡± I took a step away and grabbed the ball off the ground. ¡°Yeah. And?¡± ¡°Where was Emily?¡± I passed him the ball. ¡°What¡¯d you mean?¡± He sighed, hinting the obvious. ¡°Where, Ara?¡± ¡°Oh, um, she had her head in his lap.¡± ¡°Exactly.¡± He spun the ball around a few times between his palms, studying it. ¡°You all looked at me last night like I was coming to Morg¡¯s room for sex or something, yet Em falls asleep with her head in your husband¡¯s crotch, and no one bats an eyelid?¡± ¡°Someone did.¡± ¡°Who?¡± He glanced sideways at me, the ball rolling off his fingertips toward the hoop again. ¡°You?¡± I nodded. He sighed. ¡°Things aren¡¯t great between her and I, Ar, but . . . I love her.¡± ¡°Do you? Really?¡± I asked in a flat but curious tone. ¡°Of course.¡± He bent down to grab the ball. ¡°She just expects too much of me. I can''t be with her twenty-four-seven.¡± ¡°Or you don''t want to.¡± He made a basket, his hands staying in the air a few seconds longer than needed. ¡°I . . . I don''t know.¡± I grinned, trapping the ball under my toe as it rolled toward me. ¡°Trouble in paradise.¡± ¡°Shut up.¡± He copied my grin, elbowing me in the ribs after. ¡°Just tell me one thing,¡± I said. ¡°Sure.¡± ¡°Do you actually want to be with her, Mike, or are you holding on to her like some trophy?¡± ¡°Nice shot.¡± He laughed, watching my ball go through the hoop without hitting the rims. ¡°And . . . yes. I do want to be with her, Ara. But¡ª¡± His gaze went distant. ¡°But?¡± ¡°There are . . . things. I dunno.¡± He shook his head. ¡°I just . . . it¡¯s not all black and white.¡± ¡°So talk,¡± I said, and Mike walked away, taking a seat on the courtside bench, with his head in his hands. I sat beside him, leaving the ball to roll off, coming to rest on the foot of the hill. ¡°When I spend time with her, she¡¯s not even there. You know, I told her something really personal the other day, and she. . .¡± He leaned back, looking up at the sky. ¡°She laughed. Yet, when I told Morg the same thing, she. . .¡± ¡°She?¡± ¡°Well, she supported me. It¡¯s like, I know you think there¡¯s something with Morg and me, but there¡¯s not. She just . . . listens.¡± ¡°She gets you,¡± I said with a smile. ¡°Yeah. But it¡¯s not just her special talent, Ar. She¡¯s a good person.¡± I nodded and looked up at the same place Mike was staring. ¡°So, are you saying you want Emily to be more like Morgaine?¡± He laughed, catching the humour in my voice. ¡°I just want her to want me for more than the idea she has of me, if that makes any sense.¡± I ran the words over in my head, interpreting them as best I could. ¡°You want to be free to be you, and have her love you anyway.¡± ¡°Yeah. But she¡¯s got this image of me and what I should be, you know? And it¡¯s not me, Ar.¡± ¡°I know.¡± I nodded, thinking more about the Mike I grew up with. ¡°So, what was it?¡± ¡°What was what?¡± ¡°The personal thing you told Morg and Em, but not me.¡± His lips parted in a breathy grin. ¡°It¡¯s private.¡± ¡°Please tell me.¡± I saw him considering it as he studied me in his peripheral, and I knew that, for the first time in so long, he saw me as his best friend again. ¡°I spend more time down here than I do at the barracks.¡± ¡°Hm.¡± I was taken aback for a moment, disguising my shock quickly with a smile. ¡°You like hanging with the children?¡± He nodded, his whole body rocking with the movement. ¡°I get something out of this. I don¡¯t know. I just . . . when I spend the day with them¡ªteaching them things, playing with them, and I see the difference it makes¡ªsee them put what I¡¯ve taught them into practice or see them behave differently each time I visit, it. . .¡± He stopped for a second to look at my face. ¡°It makes my life seem like it has a purpose.¡± ¡°Really?¡± was only one of the hundred questions I suddenly wanted to ask. ¡°Yeah.¡± He looked into my eyes then at my lips, probably expecting me to laugh. ¡°Morg thinks I should change my career path.¡± ¡°To what?¡± His hands tightened, a slow breath filling the lengthy pause. ¡°A teacher.¡± My gut dropped. ¡°Are you¡ª?¡± ¡°No.¡± He waved a reassuring hand. ¡°I¡¯m not even thinking about it. You know I couldn¡¯t leave you, but I . . . I like the idea, you know, that maybe this¡ª¡± he motioned around himself and my world, ¡°¡ªisn¡¯t all there is for me.¡± ¡°And what did Em think of that?¡± ¡°She thinks . . . She¡ª¡± He swallowed the lump in his throat. ¡°Well, she said it was ridiculous. Said I was born to be Chief, and that I shouldn¡¯t be anywhere else.¡± ¡°I. . .¡± I nodded, stalling for time until I could sort my own thoughts and opinions out from my fears and worries. ¡°Morg¡¯s right, Mike. You¡¯ve always been the sort of guy who¡¯d be good at teaching. I mean, hell, you taught me nearly everything useful I know in life.¡± ¡°Aw, shucks.¡± I laughed. ¡°Buuuut. . .¡± ¡°I know.¡± He patted my hand. ¡°I know you need me here.¡± ¡°We won¡¯t always, though, Mike.¡± I patted his hand back until he looked at me. ¡°I think it¡¯s great, and I think you should definitely do it. But, just . . . can you wait ¡®til this Drake thing¡¯s resolved?¡± He put his arm around my neck and pulled me close. ¡°Sure, kid. I hadn¡¯t made any plans to go anywhere just yet. You can count on me.¡± ¡°I know.¡± I smiled, pressing my brow into his kiss. Since the king took his place on the throne, so many things had changed around here, including our secret meeting place under the Throne Room floor. The plain wooden chairs that edged the round table before had been replaced by what looked like dark-wood artefacts from King Arthur¡¯s Vault, each one square-topped, high-backed and identical. Even the king¡¯s and queen¡¯s chairs were the same as everyone else¡¯s, symbolising unity, David had told me, adding that the round table represented equality among men for the better of the kingdom. We¡¯d discussed brightening the room with modern lighting but, in the end, David felt it was best to leave things traditional. I guess growing up by the light of torches in sconces made him accustomed to it. But my new vampire vision hadn¡¯t enhanced my ability to read in the dark, which was another thing that¡¯d changed since David returned from the dead: minutes. We now documented and recorded every discussion held in this room, unless spoken in confidence¡ªthe minutes jotted down in some giant, yellowing old book with a quill and ink. David had come down with a bad case of sixteenth-century-itis. And, now, I was stuck editing the A4 sheets before they were sent to the scroll room for insertion into the giant book. ¡°Arrangements have been made,¡± David finished, cutting Mike off. ¡°I need you here to protect the queen while I¡¯m away.¡± Mike sat down on the long wooden bench against the wall. ¡°I am the head of security, David. It¡¯s my job to¡ª¡± ¡°It¡¯s your job to do as I tell you,¡± he finished, looking back at the faces around the table. Mike shook his head, yielding. ¡°Besides,¡± David added. ¡°I want you to oversee Court in my absence.¡± ¡°What?¡± pretty much everyone in the room said. David sat down, his eyes moving past Blade, Ryder, Quaid, then Falcon, landing finally on Mike. ¡°We both know Ara doesn¡¯t have the guts to do what has to be done around here.¡± ¡°Like what?¡± I cut in. ¡°The men who were arrested last week for breaking human law?¡± he said, his brow arching to prompt my memory. ¡°So I let them off with a warning.¡± I shrugged. ¡°What¡¯s wrong with showing compassion?¡± ¡°It¡¯s not how things are done,¡± David said. ¡°Now, more than ever, we need to show strength. We need to make examples of these lawbreakers and make certain their behaviour is not contagious.¡± ¡°I think the fear of torture was enough to scare them into behaving from now on,¡± I said. ¡°If that were so, my love, they¡¯d not have committed a crime in the first place.¡± ¡°David,¡± Mike said. ¡°I¡¯m not undermining Ara by ruling Court while you¡¯re gone. She has to appear strong and independent, and that¡¯s more important than seeing everyone gets the right punishments.¡± ¡°To show mercy is to exude weakness,¡± David said, and looked at Morgaine. ¡°I agree,¡± Morg said. ¡°But also agree with Mike, David. You can¡¯t put your security chief on the throne to do your bidding when you have a perfectly capable queen. What message does that give our people about your faith in her?¡± David looked sideways at me. ¡°Never mind that,¡± I said. ¡°What does it tell me about his faith in me?¡± David leaned his elbows on the table, his head falling heavily into his sigh. ¡°I have faith in you, Ara. But you¡¯re too kind, sweetheart. You let too many murderous villains off with a warning.¡± ¡°Well¡ª¡± I sat taller. ¡°I can be mean, if you want me to.¡± He half laughed. ¡°Fine. Prove it.¡± ¡°O. . .kay.¡± I looked at Mike for a second. ¡°How?¡± ¡°There will be a case brought before us in Court today¡ªthree men accused of murder in the human realm. I want you to judge them harshly, Ara. I want you to make an example of them.¡± ¡°What do you want me to do?¡± ¡°Same thing that was done before you took the throne.¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°You must sentence them to seven days¡¯ burial, without comforts. No torchlight, no air, no blood.¡± ¡°David, no.¡± ¡°Yes,¡± he said sternly. ¡°They have to learn.¡± ¡°But that¡¯s barbaric. They¡¯ll go insane.¡± He smiled. ¡°Lesser men have survived worse. Perhaps they¡¯ll come out better for it in the end.¡± ¡°I have to say, I agree.¡± Blade leaned back in his chair, chewing a piece of grass he¡¯d smuggled in. ¡°Blade? You can¡¯t be serious,¡± I said. Page 10 He looked at Emily¡¯s shocked face then back at me. ¡°Do you know what these men did?¡±Advertisement ¡°Did?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± He sat up, placing the grass on the table. ¡°Do you know what they did to their victim?¡± ¡°No.¡± ¡°They didn¡¯t just break human law, Majesty. They broke our laws by killing in cold blood. They didn¡¯t even eat the man. They stabbed him several times in the chest and left him in an alley to die.¡± ¡°Then, isn¡¯t imprisonment enough, maybe twenty-five years?¡± ¡°For a human, yes, given that they lead such short lives,¡± Ryder piped up. ¡°But not for our kind, My Queen. It¡¯s laughable.¡± Mike stood. ¡°I agree, Ara. You need to use scare tactics right now. Once you¡¯ve established your monarchy and shown your strength, you can ease up a bit, but right now, people are looking for signs of weakness.¡± ¡°So these men have to suffer so I can make a point?¡± ¡°There are many casualties on the road to freedom, Majesty.¡± Morgaine bowed her head. ¡°Their sacrifice is given for the greater good.¡± ¡°Fine then,¡± I challenged, looking at my king. ¡°I¡¯ll do it, but you¡¯re going to walk those men down to the crypt and close their coffins yourself.¡± ¡°A good councilman always does.¡± ¡°Yes, but you''re not a councilman anymore, David.¡± I stood up. ¡°You''re the king.¡± ¡°Which means I¡¯m extending a courtesy to you by arguing this, Ara. That courtesy ends now.¡± ¡°This isn¡¯t¡ª¡± ¡°Sit down,¡± he said firmly, and the room fell to flat silence. ¡°No. I don¡¯t agree with this. I don¡¯t agree that burying men alive is going to solve anything.¡± ¡°You don¡¯t have to agree. I am the king, and I have final say.¡± My mouth opened to protest, but I just couldn¡¯t believe what I was hearing, and the whole room seemed to stand still, as if no one had the courage to speak up against their king, even though he was wrong. ¡°In this monarchy,¡± I said firmly, my voice not even shaking, ¡°the queen holds the power.¡± ¡°Not the way I run things.¡± He stood up slowly, placing his hands on the table, and I finally saw what it was the people saw in this king¡ªthe reason they feared him. ¡°Now. Sit. Down.¡± ¡°No.¡± ¡°Ara. I''m not kidding. There are ways things need to be done. You have a king because you don''t have the gut to handle this stuff. Now sit and let us do our job.¡± ¡°I won''t allow torture.¡± David¡¯s stone face broke; he laughed, waving a hand in my direction. ¡°Take your idealism somewhere else, Ara. I don''t have time for it.¡± I swallowed, digging deeper for a little inner strength, and looked at Mike, whose mouth hung open. This was clearly the councilman we hadn¡¯t met yet¡ªthe David everyone warned me about. But I wasn¡¯t surprised, not like Mike. I¡¯d seen this David before. ¡°Mate, why not let her try it her way? If you¡¯re right, the best way to show Ara is to let her learn from her own experiences. She¡¯ll never learn from being told.¡± David stared Mike down for a second, then turned to me, his eyes softening when he looked into mine. ¡°Okay. Go ahead, but you¡¯ll be taking us back to the Stone Age, Ara, and when more vampires go ramped because there¡¯s nothing to fear, we¡¯ll be doing it my way, and I don''t want any arguments from you.¡± ¡°Okay,¡± I whispered, nodding. ¡°Right. Now. Missing venom stores.¡± He looked around the room. ¡°What do we know?¡± ¡°Nothing yet, Your Majesty.¡± Blade sat back, linking both hands behind his head. ¡°The dawn guard noticed the lock on the weapons vault was broken at about four in the morning, and seventy per cent of the venom was gone¡ªno fingerprints, no fibres or hairs. Nothing.¡± ¡°Do we think it was inside job?¡± He looked at Mike. ¡°I¡¯m looking in to that,¡± Mike said. ¡°And we¡¯ve got forensics on it, too. They¡¯re combing that place as we speak. If anything¡¯s to be found, they¡¯ll find it.¡± ¡°There¡¯s one thing they can¡¯t find,¡± Quaid said, and we all looked at him; he grinned. ¡°A motive.¡± ¡°Well, I have a pretty good idea what the motive is,¡± David said flatly. ¡°And I¡¯m damn sure we¡¯ll be seeing those venom stores again¡ªon the battlefield.¡± ¡°For real?¡± I said, not really meaning to say it out loud. David looked over at me, offering a small smile. ¡°Drake has threatened us once before. I¡¯m pretty sure he¡¯s preparing for war, Ara. And I¡¯m certain he will attack without warning.¡± ¡°Should we evacuate the town? The Lilithians have human children there.¡± David shook his head. ¡°Not yet. I¡¯m sending spies out to Elysium tomorrow to keep an eye on things.¡± ¡°But, last we heard, Drake still hadn¡¯t returned there,¡± Mike said. ¡°So, if he¡¯s planning an attack, it¡¯ll be from somewhere unknown.¡± ¡°Perhaps. But we don¡¯t have those kinds of resources elsewhere, Mike,¡± David said, meaning ¡®we¡¯ as the Set he used to belong to. ¡°Drake needs the armoury at Elysium if he¡¯s going to attack. And when he returns to set things in motion, my spies will alert us.¡± ¡°Fine but, in the meantime, we need to find those venom stores. Without those, all he can do is injure our troops.¡± ¡°Or kidnap one to extract venom,¡± Blade said, sending Mike and I stiff. If Drake came after anyone for their venom, it could only be either myself, Mike, or one of my private guards¡ªall people I cared about immensely. ¡°Yes, so, with that in mind,¡± David said, pointing at Mike and my Guard. ¡°I want you five to be extra vigilant.¡± ¡°What about me?¡± I asked. ¡°You don¡¯t need vigilance. You have me.¡± I sat back, rolling my eyes. If he kept up this high-and-mighty behaviour, he¡¯d be the one needing vigilance. I no longer feared the Enchanted Forest. All those tales I¡¯d been told about the trees imprisoning anyone who dared walk below their bows at the hour of dawn must have been lies. Nothing like that had ever happened to me. But the rumour did afford me a kind of privacy at this hour I couldn¡¯t get anywhere else, which gave me a chance to think about things I couldn¡¯t dare think of at the manor. A bright orange orb glowed through the trunks up ahead at a distance, the dawn rising around the forest like a warm greeting. I reached out and touched the base of each tree I passed, a kind of unspoken good morning, and each one responded with a gentle tingle against my fingertips. The ground beneath my bare feet was covered in dry, summer leaves, cushioning my steps while the energy of the forest rose up from the platform of nature, electrifying every nerve within me. I felt alive out here. More alive than anywhere else I¡¯d ever been. There was no loneliness in this forest¡ªnot like when I visited the Garden of Lilith. No, out here I had the company of something not found within the border of the manor. It was as if Nature had given up on that place¡ªgiven up on the grounds, the people, even my garden. But ever since the day I swore in my own blood to protect the Stone and everything under its rule, the need to feel the buzz of life around me had become like my need for oxygen. If a day went by where I didn¡¯t come here, didn¡¯t strip down to nakedness, or at least leave my shoes behind out of respect for those things living under my feet, it almost felt like I was trapped in a coffin. And with all the pain I¡¯d suffered these passing years, the last thing I needed was to feel buried as well. I walked on toward the openness up ahead, in search of the space and breath I knew I¡¯d find above the valley. I could breathe out here, but I could not escape the emptiness I brought with me. Something was missing. Some vital part of my mind or maybe soul had disconnected somehow, and no matter how hard I searched, I couldn¡¯t find the time or place in my memory that it first occurred. But I knew something wasn¡¯t right, and I knew that the bad dreams, the memory loss and this hollowness inside me was connected and that, somehow, it had something to do with Jase. Maybe it was as simple as my denied heart wanting him as a friend, or maybe it went deeper. I wasn¡¯t sure. But I had to figure it out, whatever it was, for David¡¯s sake and mine. As I reached the clearing at the Stone of Truth, the energy in the forest surged and raced toward me along veins under the ground, gathering and collecting in this one place, rising up through my feet to wake my sleeping cells, then trickling away again and returning to the Stone. I closed my eyes and held my arms out, angling my face to the sky, while the whispers of Nature filled the silence, making all the tiny hairs on my body stand on end. I could hear the wind kiss the thin edges of every leaf, could feel the small droplets of sunlight sneaking through the canopy, dancing intermittently on the bark around my toes, could hear the smallest insects crawling beneath the soil, and hear even the brush of a bird¡¯s wing on the sky. This was my song. This was where I could plug myself in to all that I was, and just exist, for no other reason than to be a part of something greater. Here, I could think clearly. Here, I could focus on something other than the suffocating dread I had that something was missing. Here, I could quieten my mind long enough to see the answers beneath all the questions. ¡°Auress?¡± a child called. I slowly opened my eyes and lowered my arms, but as my gaze went to the Stone, a flash of gold hair caught my eye. ¡°Hello? Is anyone there?¡± A child¡¯s face showed around a tree trunk; her cheeky smile challenging. ¡°What are you doing?¡± I called, but she ducked out of sight again¡ªher high giggles echoing off everything around me. ¡°Eve, is that you?¡± She ran to the next tree, her hair trailing behind her like gold ribbons, but when I came upon her, she was gone again. ¡°Eve?¡± I called. ¡°Please come out.¡± I waited. ¡°Eve?¡± She giggled again, this time appearing further away. I ran after her, my limbs opening up as I broke into a fast, human sprint, feeling the air expand my lungs like a breath I¡¯d forgotten to take. I followed her all the way out to the clearing by the lighthouse, glad I¡¯d decided not to walk naked today, and stopped dead. ¡°What the¡ª?¡± Trees had grown up overnight like blossoming buds in a time-lapse film, their luscious leaves casting shadows over the long grass, where the scent of apples and rotting cider wafted on the early fog, making sweet perfume in the air. I walked cautiously between the columns of trees, pinching the leaves on a few branches as I went to see if they were real. And as I came to a stop at the giant oak tree, centre to the orchard, I knew then that the child I saw must have been Evangeline. Page 11 ¡°Auress,¡± she said, and my gaze went up the trunk to the tiny child sitting on the longest branch¡ªone leg dangling down, her finger twirling a lock of hair into a curl. ¡°What are you doing up there?¡± I stepped closer.Advertisement She smiled and reached up to pluck something from between two branches, holding it out in her open palm after. ¡°Come down, Eve?¡± I offered my hand. ¡°Please?¡± She smiled, but shook her head. ¡°Why? Why won¡¯t you come down?¡± The smile grew, her eyes darting from my face to something behind me. And a hand came down on my shoulder. I spun around and shielded my eyes, blinded suddenly by the high sun, seeing only a silhouette of a man there. ¡°Jeeze, Ara, I¡¯m sorry,¡± Jason said, helping me stand from the folded position I took. ¡°I didn¡¯t mean to scare you.¡± ¡°You didn¡¯t,¡± I said, feeling silly. ¡°It¡¯s just the light. It blinded me for a sec.¡± He laughed. ¡°What were . . . what were you doing?¡± I looked back at the oak tree. Eve was gone. ¡°I was. . .¡± ¡°You have no idea, do you?¡± he asked, taking a step back from me. I stood with my mouth open for a second. ¡°I . . . no. Not really.¡± He laughed again. ¡°You were talking to someone.¡± ¡°Was I?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°What was I saying?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know. It wasn¡¯t in English.¡± I felt my face pale. ¡°It wasn¡¯t?¡± ¡°No.¡± My jaw angled slightly away from him then, my gaze drifting inconspicuously to the field. The apple trees were gone¡ªthe fog and the cool and the scent of the orchard fading with it. I rubbed my head. ¡°I must have been sleepwalking.¡± Jase nodded, thoughtful. ¡°What are you doing out here, anyway?¡± I asked. ¡°It¡¯s very early.¡± ¡°Early?¡± He looked up at the sky, then into the distance where the manor sat, its cream fascia rising up over the Enchanted Forest like a castle. ¡°It¡¯s after midday, Ara.¡± ¡°Oh. Um. Really?¡± I rubbed my head. ¡°Yes.¡± He drew both hands from his jeans pockets and walked over to sit under the old oak¡¯s leafy bows. ¡°Are you okay, Ara?¡± ¡°Yeah,¡± I said wistfully, my toes parting the long grass with each step, the temperature of the soil beneath it cool and moist as if the morning were new. I tucked my dress under my bottom and sat down beside Jase. ¡°I guess I¡¯ve just got a lot going on.¡± He nodded casually, reaching between us to pluck a blade of grass from its roots. ¡°Wanna talk about it?¡± ¡°Yes,¡± I said, but didn¡¯t talk. ¡°You know¡ª¡± He leaned forward, resting his arm over a bended knee, wrapping the grass around his fingertip like a green ring. ¡°I was thinking about you before I ran into you.¡± ¡°You were?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°All good thoughts, I hope.¡± He lay back, crossing his hands under his head, his feet flat on the ground just by my leg. ¡°I was just thinking how amazing it is that we¡¯re both still here, you and I¡ªthat we can be friends¡ªsit side by side this way after everything you¡¯ve been through.¡± ¡°You mean after everything evil you did to me,¡± I joked, gently slapping his bony knee. He lifted his head a bit and offered a sweet smile, that soft, Jason smile that radiated the kindness in his soul. ¡°Yes, and that takes an unbelievable amount of strength, Ara, which is as scary as it is incredible.¡± ¡°Scary? How?¡± ¡°Because I can''t even begin to imagine what it must have taken for you to survive what I did to you¡ªboth times. And yet you came out of that. Your scars healed, your heart healed and, somehow, you found the strength to not only move on, but forgive me,¡± his voice broke. ¡°Wow, you¡¯re really cut up about all this,¡± I said, still making light of things. ¡°Do you know why?¡± ¡°Why?¡± I sat back against the barky trunk. ¡°It¡¯s because you are capable of more than you possibly realise, Ara. Yet you don¡¯t know that, and it breaks my heart.¡± ¡°Aw.¡± I tilted my head bashfully to one side. ¡°No, I mean it. You . . . you''re like those fake columns in the Throne Room.¡± I pictured the stone pillars marking the aisles of the Throne Room, sitting proudly as beams of support, despite baring no actual weight at all. ¡°How do you know they''re fake?¡± ¡°I hear you think of them a lot.¡± He shrugged against the grass. ¡°And I think that¡¯s because you know you¡¯re just the same.¡± ¡°How so?¡± ¡°You might not feel like the pillar of strength, Ara, but if that roof ever does cave in, you¡¯ll be the one left standing, still holding everything together.¡± I scoffed, crossing my legs under me. ¡°I doubt that.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t. I mean, if you think about it, you always have been.¡± ¡°Me? No way. You¡¯re thinking of David.¡± ¡°No. He¡¯s the hammer that nails the coffin, so to speak. No one would ever mess with him. But you¡¯re the one they look to for strength, Ara. Because you exude it in every breath you take, and everyone I speak to says the same thing: they have no idea how you¡¯ve come to survive what you¡¯ve suffered.¡± I lay down in the grass too, my toes against his shoes, bodies facing opposite directions. ¡°Well, with you saying nice things like that to me, maybe I¡¯ll start to believe it all one day.¡± He crawled over and landed on his side next to me, smiling at the corner of my mouth. ¡°Sweet girl, you already do.¡± I smiled, too, reaching down to scratch the itchy rash on my hip. ¡°Yeah. Okay. Maybe I believe that, but I don''t think I¡¯ve found any backbone yet to support my own opinions.¡± He knocked my hand gently away from my skin. ¡°I don''t know about that. I saw you make your own ruling in your very first session of Court.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I thought back to that day. ¡°Guess I kinda did. But I got in trouble after.¡± ¡°So what? As long as you thought it was the right thing to do.¡± He turned my face until I looked into his eyes. ¡°Be the spoilt queen if you have to. Make your own decisions and know that we will back you one hundred per cent.¡± ¡°Some of you will,¡± I said flatly, thinking about David. ¡°No,¡± he said sternly. ¡°All of us will.¡± I looked up at the blue through the dancing leaves above us, trying hard to believe that. ¡°But what if I put my foot down about something, and I''m wrong?¡± ¡°Then we back you on that, too.¡± He lay back again. ¡°But, you won''t be wrong. You¡¯re a smart girl. You just have to trust yourself.¡± I pushed up on my elbow and looked down at his face; his eyes met mine, all green and lovely, sparkling in the morning light, but the shadows made dark circles under them, showing how tired he was, how tired his soul was. I wiped my thumb softly over the sunken skin and leaned in to kiss his cheek in an innocent, friendly gesture. ¡°Thanks, Jase.¡± He slowly cupped the small wet spot my lips left, a smile growing across his face. ¡°You don''t need to thank me for saying things you should already know.¡± ¡°Yes, I do. Because you''re the only one who ever does.¡± He shook his head, still smiling, casting his gaze to the leaves. ¡°You know David will see that kiss in your thoughts, right?¡± ¡°Oops.¡± I cringed a little. Jason laughed. ¡°It¡¯s okay. It was worth it.¡± ¡°Worth a week in the dungeon?¡± He sat quiet for a second, then nodded once. ¡°Definitely.¡± I still had no clue if this scroll was a prophecy or a contract. Everyone had very compelling theories either way, but no one seemed to know any truths. Which is what brought me down here to the Scroll Room in the dead of night. I laid the yellowing document on the table in front of me, not bothering with tweezers to preserve the delicate, ancient paper. Quite frankly, if it got destroyed, maybe all this nonsense would die with it: no more mystery surrounding its interpretation, no more possibility that either my daughter or me have been sworn over to Drake, and no more plans for one of us to be killed on the Stone of Truth with the Dagger of Yahanna so the bad guy could steal our powers. And maybe, just maybe, it would put this nonsense of David dying to rest. But, I knew that removing the needle wouldn¡¯t undo the sting. ¡°Argh!¡± I huffed, scraping a layer of ash away from the corner of the page. Whoever damaged these scrolls had done a darn good job of it. There were barely any words left to read, and that was if you could even read the Language of the Ancients. Which, I couldn¡¯t. But I did still have Jason¡¯s sheet of interpretations. Only, even his words didn¡¯t make sense if this scroll was a contract. It just seemed too melodramatic: A time will come for the Pure One to rise. In Her Reign Of Light And Hope, she will free the land from the Fated Curse, and bear a child with great power. I slid the other page of Jason¡¯s English translations over and held the candle up to them so I could see better in this dim, midnight light. The next line said, A child, possible only if conceived of pure? ¡ªthe question mark circled in red, because he wasn¡¯t sure if the translation for that word was noble blood, blood of Knight, or cleansed, since they could all mean the same thing. Then there were the next words: Born as and Son. He¡¯d told me the symbol for those words had no translation¡ªthat it was similar to a word meaning firstborn, but also to one meaning disguised. I exhaled with a grunt and sat back in the hard wooden chair, propping my feet up on the oak stabiliser under the table. How was I ever going to come up with an answer to this mystery if I couldn¡¯t decide what I believed to be true? Or maybe that was it. Maybe I had to pick a story and go with it. I pawed over the pages again, comparing the symbols to the English notes. ¡°Need some help?¡± ¡°Gah!¡± I dropped the scroll, blowing out the hard breath that almost became a really loud scream when I saw the familiar face. ¡°Blade? You scared the living hell out of me.¡± ¡°Oh, good.¡± He pulled up a chair and sat beside me. ¡°If there¡¯s no hell in you, maybe I won¡¯t find you so hot anymore.¡± ¡°Huh?¡± I issued him a dumbfounded stare. ¡°You know,¡± he explained, rolling his hand around as if I might get the joke. ¡°Because Hell is hot.¡± ¡°Oh. Right.¡± I looked back at the pages. ¡°Well, sorry to burst your bubble, Blade, but you¡¯re bound by the Curse of the Original Lilith. You¡¯ll love me until you die.¡± ¡°Or until I fall head over heels for someone else.¡± Page 12 ¡°Good luck with that,¡± I said. ¡°Not too many worthy female counterparts around here.¡±Advertisement ¡°Anything¡¯s gotta be better than you.¡± He nudged me with his elbow, flashing a toothy grin. ¡°Yes, considering I may be destined for death-by-evil-vampire.¡± He leaned in and peered at my sheets. ¡°Hm. Tricky stuff, huh?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I dumped the pages on the desk again and rubbed my face. ¡°You got any ideas what all this means?¡± ¡°A few.¡± I turned my head to look at him, but he sat there, his face straight, hands in his lap, looking distracted or maybe bored. ¡°Blade?¡± I said loudly, slapping his wrist. ¡°Okay.¡± He laughed, snapping out it. ¡°Couldn''t resist torturing you a little.¡± ¡°I think I¡¯ve had enough torture for one lifetime.¡± ¡°Ah ha!¡± He laughed, pointing at me. ¡°Funny.¡± ¡°More like distasteful.¡± ¡°Nah, it was actually funny,¡± he said in that well-articulated English accent, drawing his chair a little closer to the lip of the table. ¡°Right. So, prophecy or contract? What is the answer?¡± ¡°I think it¡¯s a contract.¡± ¡°As do I, pretty queen,¡± he said distractedly, his eyes moving over the words. ¡°But, for what, exactly?¡± ¡°A child.¡± ¡°Yes. A child conceived with a firstborn nobleman and a pure Lilithian.¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°And then again, we could be wrong.¡± He looked up at me. I sunk back in my seat. ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°So, why the big deal about all this?¡± He held up the scroll in question. ¡°I mean, what does it matter if we find the truth or not, really?¡± ¡°It doesn¡¯t.¡± I took the scroll and rolled it up. ¡°I guess I just don¡¯t like questions being unanswered.¡± ¡°Well, Princess Sherlock¡ª¡± he stood up and pushed his chair in, ¡°¡ªyou won¡¯t find the answers by looking at the same sheet you¡¯ve been looking at every night since David arose from the dead.¡± I frowned at him, tucking the scroll under my arm. ¡°You¡¯ve been following me?¡± ¡°It¡¯s my job.¡± He spread both arms out and took a small bow. ¡°Not at night.¡± His lip curved into a sharp, sideways smile. ¡°I am your eternal servant, My Queen. I am never off duty, especially when I know that you know you don¡¯t have a guard on at night.¡± ¡°Why should that matter?¡± My lip turned up. ¡°What did you think I was up to down here?¡± ¡°Nothing bad. That¡¯s not why I followed you.¡± ¡°Then why did you?¡± I pushed past him and walked into the storage room; the musty smell of lonely pages was stronger here, closed in by the narrow aisles at least two vampires tall and twenty meters long, the shelves crammed tightly with scrolls and parchments. Blade leaned his forearm on the doorframe above his head. ¡°I was worried.¡± ¡°Worried?¡± ¡°Yes. About you¡ªabout how you¡¯re feeling right now.¡± He folded his arms. ¡°I actually thought you might be coming down here to cry in privacy.¡± I gave a mock pout, grabbing a pile of scrolls. ¡°How sweet. But I¡¯m not that into you, Blade, not enough to cry.¡± ¡°Ha-ha.¡± He stepped aside to let me pass. ¡°But, seriously, I thought you might be upset about David.¡± ¡°What about him?¡± ¡°About the way he¡¯s been treating you,¡± he said suggestively. I stopped walking. ¡°Yeah,¡± Blade added. ¡°I notice everything.¡± ¡°He¡¯s just trying to stamp his seal, if you know what I mean.¡± ¡°I get that.¡± Blade walked over and pushed in the chair I¡¯d left hanging out. ¡°But he¡¯s all high and mighty about it this week. He¡¯s even hurt my feelings.¡± I laughed. ¡°He¡¯ll get over it. I¡¯m giving him a gentle period of adjustment. Then, I¡¯ll kick his ass if he snaps at me in public again.¡± ¡°Is he. . .¡± Blade lowered his face but looked up with his eyes. ¡°Is he like that behind closed doors?¡± ¡°No,¡± I said, laughing the word out. ¡°He¡¯s still the same sweet David.¡± ¡°M¡¯kay.¡± He nodded. ¡°Well, I¡¯m just lookin¡¯ out for ya, is all.¡± ¡°Thanks. I appreciate that.¡± ¡°Any time, Sherlock.¡± He saluted me and grabbed the stone column beside the stairs, using it to sling his body around the corner and out of sight. ¡°Morning, My Queen.¡± Edgar bowed, placing a tray on the edge of my bed. ¡°Morning, Edgar.¡± I sat up a little to look at David. ¡°Where¡¯s the king?¡± ¡°In the crypt, Majesty.¡± Edgar wandered over and opened my curtains. ¡°He¡¯s given permission for you to dine in bed this morning.¡± ¡°The crypt. What¡¯s he doing in there?¡± ¡°I believe he is carrying out the sentence he passed on the four men from New York this morning.¡± ¡°What!¡± I shoved the covers back. ¡°I sentenced those men yesterday at Court. They were to be put in the cell block.¡± ¡°My apologies, Majesty.¡± Edgar bowed. ¡°Perhaps I am mistaken.¡± ¡°No, you¡¯re not, Edgar.¡± I slipped my robe on and tied the belt around my waist. ¡°David¡¯s gone behind my back.¡± I charged forward, ignoring Falcon¡¯s line of questions as my feet moved over carpet then tiles then stone steps, following my memory down through the cell tunnels and the dark, chilly corridors that led to the crypt below the manor. Row upon of row of caskets lined the walls like bars of gold in a vault, each one containing an ancient skeleton of loved ones passed, or victims of Lilith¡¯s hunger in the days she was alive. I¡¯d been down to the crypt only once¡ªwalked into the open cavern of the Main Tomb, and my blood had run cold. It reminded me of a great underground cave, the walls rising high into the air above, almost blue-grey, turning black where the cave went too deep to see. But you couldn¡¯t walk through it. The cave went on forever behind a small brick wall placed as a partition between the floor and an endless drop into nothing¡ªthe same endless drop they lowered prisoners into when Drake ruled. My steps slowed slightly as I reached the end of the tunnel, seeing the orange glow of firelight flicker across the dirt floor, while a hammering sound echoed off the drop. And right where Edgar said he¡¯d be, my husband was fastening the last nail into a coffin¡ªthe other prisoners nowhere to be seen. ¡°David.¡± I reached down and grabbed his arm. ¡°What are you doing?¡± ¡°What needs to be done.¡± ¡°No.¡± I placed my hand over a soldier¡¯s as he and another lifted the coffin. ¡°I made a ruling. I sentenced these men to twenty years in The First Order¡¯s cells, away from their homes, friends, everything.¡± ¡°Take him away.¡± David waved a hand, standing up, and the soldiers shrugged me off, hooking chains under the casket. ¡°How could you go against me like this?¡± I stood back. ¡°Ara?¡± David drew a long breath, pinching his brow. ¡°This is my ruling, and when you sit in that Court, day after day, and see no more cases like this, you¡¯ll thank me.¡± The men hitched the chained coffin to the hook hanging over the depths of the sixty-foot hole it was destined for. I watched on, holding my breath, until David walked toward the crank that lowers the chain. ¡°David, stop.¡± He paused, his shoulders high and stiff. ¡°Ara, please don¡¯t make this any harder than it has to be.¡± ¡°Hard? Hard for who?¡± I cried, listening to the man inside the box banging the lid, screaming for all the mercy of the gods. ¡°Please, don¡¯t do this. You talk about showing ourselves to be strong, a force to be reckoned with, yet you go against your own queen. How can my people respect me, if even you don¡¯t?¡± ¡°They don¡¯t need to respect the queen, Ara,¡± he said, then nodded to a soldier near the door. ¡°They need to love her.¡± ¡°What are you doing?¡± I struggled against the man as he pulled me away from David. ¡°Let go of me.¡± ¡°You are the heart of this nation, Ara.¡± David placed both hands on my arms. ¡°I am the fear. They will not cross me again, nor will any other vampire, for that matter. And in my doing this, you¡¯ve not had to sentence men to tortures you¡¯ll lose sleep over.¡± ¡°But I¡¯ll lose sleep anyway, David,¡± I cried. ¡°Please?¡± He wandered over and wound the crank, sending the last man slowly to the burrows of Hell. ¡°David, this is madness. Please stop, I¡¯m begging you.¡± ¡°This is how things have always been done, Ara.¡± He turned to face me. ¡°They tested our resolve, and this is their reward.¡± The man¡¯s screams hollowed out, his scratching and clawing becoming an echo as the box hit the earth and the darkness of the past¡ªthe darkness David had become accustomed to, grown up in, desensitised to¡ªrounded out around me, drawing me into both his world and his past. And I didn¡¯t want to be a part of that. I watched him shovel a heap of dirt and toss it ceremoniously into the hole, and I loved him and respected him as much as I hated him right then. I knew he was right. I knew if those men were allowed to escape with easy punishment, they¡¯d be back here in thirty years having done the same thing, as would many more over that time. David was the rightful king, the man who had the heart to get things done, even if those same things would break mine. But he wasn¡¯t my David, right now. He wasn''t the boy I fell in love with. This David was something else entirely. I dropped to my knees as the last heap of dirt covered the vampire¡¯s cries, and David came to squat before me. ¡°My love?¡± Tear streamed past my lips, making my nose run. I wiped them away with my sleeve, refusing to look at him. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Ara.¡± He stood up. ¡°I hope one day you¡¯ll come to understand why I had to do this.¡± I nodded, pushing up off the ground to stand. ¡°I understand. I really do.¡± He stroked my cheek once. ¡°But I¡¯ve hurt you.¡± My tears salted the air on my lips. I looked up into his loving eyes, and the hatred I had for him a moment ago trickled away, taking the anger with it. ¡°Like I said, I understand why you did.¡± He kissed my brow and stepped past me, nodding at the guard before leaving the crypt, his shadow flickering on the walls under firelight until it disappeared. ¡°Blade?¡± I met him on the stairwell toward the eastern quadrant. ¡°My Queen. How are you?¡± He touched his chest, bowing. ¡°I heard what happened.¡± I stopped on the stair below him, hearing the screams of that man echo throughout my soul. My tears had dried, but I knew my face was still red. ¡°Look, I know we shouldn¡¯t be talking alone, given the curse of Lilith and all, so I¡¯ll get straight to the point.¡± Page 13 ¡°Of course, My Queen. How can I help?¡±Advertisement ¡°You¡¯re the only one I can trust with this, Blade. You¡¯ve always been on my side, and¡ª¡± ¡°What is it, Ara?¡± He stepped down so he stood beside me. ¡°You can ask anything of me.¡± ¡°You¡¯re good with the law, right?¡± ¡°Yeah. Why?¡± ¡°Because, it has come to my attention that I am of little value in this system¡ªthat David and Walter and everyone else are calling the shots, while I''m left to wander around thinking I''m making a difference.¡± ¡°Aw, Ara, it¡¯s not like that. You¡¯re¡ª¡± ¡°No. It¡¯s true. They¡¯re so used to me being this inept little human, they haven¡¯t seen me become the vampire¡ªthe Lilithian.¡± I stood taller, rolling my shoulders back. ¡°I want you to tutor me. I want you teach me the laws, the ways, the things I''m missing so that I can finally step up and play the role I was born to play.¡± ¡°I thought Morgaine was teaching you.¡± I paused for a second, thinking about her lessons. ¡°I get the feeling sometimes that she¡¯s teaching me only what she wants me to know.¡± His brows moved slowly to pinch over the bridge of his nose. ¡°Serious?¡± I hesitated only for a second. ¡°I¡¯m serious.¡± ¡°So you. . .¡± He leaned closer, his hot breath brushing my hair with the scent of mint. ¡°You don¡¯t trust her?¡± I shook my head, half checking over my shoulder. He nodded, his lips thin. ¡°Neither do I.¡± ¡°What?¡± My eyes flicked onto his. He started walking, motioning for me to follow. ¡°I¡¯ve had my suspicions from the beginning about her. I¡¯m not sure what the deal is, but I . . . I dunno. Something tells me not to trust her.¡± ¡°So. . .¡± I walked quickly, trying to keep up with him, feeling a little uncomfortable in this quadrant of the manor. ¡°You¡¯ll help me?¡± He stopped walking. ¡°Are you sure you want to do this¡ªstepping up, I mean? It won¡¯t be easy.¡± I thrust my shoulders back. ¡°If I wanted life to be easy, Blade, I would have left Drake on the throne.¡± ¡°Yeah!¡± He pumped his fist then held his hand in the air. ¡°High five, girl.¡± I slapped his palm. ¡°So, does that mean you¡¯ll help me?¡± ¡°When do we start?¡± he asked with a grin. ¡°Tonight. After lights-out.¡± ¡°Perfect. Where?¡± ¡°Oh, um, meet me in the library at twelve,¡± I said, turning to walk away. ¡°I¡¯ll be there.¡± Even though the table was only meters long, the separation between David I felt like miles. He sipped his wine, eyeing me the whole time, probably trying to get a grasp on my thoughts. But I had a mind blanket the size of Manhattan quilting them. He wasn¡¯t getting in, no matter how hard he tried. Jason looked across at me, his shoulders sinking, and offered a sympathetic smile. And I looked away. With the mood David was in right now, last thing I needed was him making an ¡®example¡¯ out of Jason too. ¡°I have to say, I agree with Walt,¡± David said, and I looked up. ¡°If his contact says Drake hasn¡¯t returned to Elysium, then I¡¯m happy to go ahead with our plans this weekend.¡± Walt nodded. ¡°I believe it¡¯s best, Your Highness, to get these prisoners sorted quickly. There are more important matters at hand.¡± ¡°Like our missing venom stores,¡± Margret added. ¡°We¡¯re looking into that,¡± David said. ¡°But we haven¡¯t got anything to go on.¡± ¡°We could just call Drake and ask him if he took them?¡± Morgaine said, her tone light, joking. ¡°I mean, I still have his number in my contacts.¡± Everyone at the table laughed. ¡°Actually, I¡¯ve sanctioned the help of our white canine friend,¡± David said, sipping his wine after. ¡°He¡¯s going to sniff out the trail.¡± ¡°Sniff it out, Majesty?¡± Walt raised a brow. ¡°Yes.¡± David held back a grin, knowing how ridiculous it sounded. But it was actually a good plan. ¡°Well, perhaps I may be of service then,¡± Walt added. ¡°I could follow the dog, take a team with me, and hopefully recover our losses.¡± David nodded. ¡°Thank you, Walt. Although, I¡¯m not sure we¡¯ll find anything more than the route they took.¡± ¡°Much can be learned simply by knowing their method of entry,¡± Walt added. My eyes narrowed involuntarily, and I sent a little thought to David: So we¡¯re trusting Walt now, even though he¡¯s only pretending to be Blood Bound to this Throne? He looked up, answering Arthur then Margret, and thought, I¡¯ll talk to you about that later, for me. I shook the irritation from my head, biting my teeth together. One minute, Walt was the traitor that infiltrated our Council, the next minute he¡¯s in charge of a very important operation, and David says he¡¯ll talk about it later. How was it that I got left out of this loop along the way? If things had changed regarding Walt, I should have been the first to know. And this just cemented even deeper the notion that, as a wife, I could trust David with my heart but, as his queen, I couldn¡¯t trust a goddamn thing he said. I sat back in my chair and aimed my gaze at Blade, hoping he¡¯d catch it, but his eyes were small and smiling, lost on Emily¡¯s face as she talked with him across the table. Even Morg was watching them. ¡°What¡¯s the deal?¡± I leaned closer to Morgaine. She sat up, looking away from them. ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°Oh, come on, Morg. You know what I mean.¡± I presented Em and Blade. ¡°Nothing.¡± She smiled in their direction. ¡°Emily just told a funny joke.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± I sat lower in my chair. ¡°Guess I missed it.¡± ¡°That¡¯s because you weren''t paying attention,¡± she said casually, scooping some food onto her fork. ¡°Nothing new there.¡± I rolled my eyes and slumped lazily on the arm of the chair. A fire burned bright between the windows, making the brown spines of old books glow orange. The tables were all bare again, the librarian having finished her cataloguing, and the room once again looked like a place of sanctuary. Even Arthur had taken up a seat by the long table facing the flames, instead of reading in his room like he had done lately. I wandered across and peered over his shoulder. ¡°What you readin¡¯?¡± He looked up quickly, flipping the book closed. ¡°My Queen.¡± ¡°Human anatomy?¡± I frowned, plonking my butt on the chair beside him. ¡°Yes.¡± He spun in his seat to face me, resting his jaw on his hand. ¡°I¡¯ve decided to study human medicine again.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Well, we¡¯re a society made up greatly of both vampires and Lilithians,¡± he explained. ¡°And with Lilithian bodies retaining much of their human makeup, I figured a doctor who is versed in both vampire and human biology might be of some use.¡± I nodded. ¡°So, you planning to deliver a baby sometime soon?¡± ¡°You saw that,¡± he stated to himself, nodding. ¡°Yeah. Why are you reading up on reproductive systems?¡± ¡°I was just comparing the differences in knowledge from the days when I was the most educated man in medicine to what they know now.¡± He laughed, making a pile of his books as he stood. ¡°Quite a few advances.¡± ¡°Yeah, just a few.¡± I stood too. ¡°Why¡¯s the fire burning? It¡¯s only just September.¡± ¡°It makes me feel more¡­human to sit here and read with the glow of firelight.¡± I looked at the chair by the fire, the pipe on the arm, and the copy The Hunchback of Notre Dame on the footstool. ¡°You used to sit here with Arietta.¡± He smiled at the scene. ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°I''m sorry. I wish I could bring her back to life.¡± ¡°Well,¡± he said, picking up his reading material. ¡°Let¡¯s just focus on making sure I never have to say those words to you.¡± I smiled as Arthur walked away. ¡°Night, Arthur.¡± ¡°Night, my dear,¡± he said, then tipped his head at the dark-haired knight who entered as he exited. ¡°Blade.¡± ¡°Arthur,¡± Blade said casually, turning once to watch him leave. ¡°I think we scared him off.¡± ¡°Probably for the best anyway.¡± I leaned on the tabletop. ¡°Not sure I want everyone knowing what we¡¯re up to.¡± ¡°I thought you trusted Arthur.¡± ¡°I do. But I¡¯m starting to see why people around here place more distance on friends than they do enemies.¡± ¡°Oh?¡± He leaned on the table beside me, crossing his ankles. ¡°And why is that?¡± ¡°Because friends betray you in your best interests, Blade. And there is nothing more dangerous than a person who is trying to protect you from the truth for your own good.¡± The corners of his lips turned down with thought, his head bowing once in a nod of approval. ¡°You sure you need me to teach you anything?¡± I laughed. ¡°You sure you need to ask that question?¡± He stood from his lean and wandered over to the whiteboard¡ªstuffed neatly into a crevice behind a desk¡ªand lifted it onto its stand. ¡°Right, before we learn anything about the law or the ins and outs of queenly duties, let¡¯s start with where you¡¯re going wrong and why you may have the respect of your people but not of your peers.¡± I looked into my lap for a second, digesting that. ¡°Straight to the nitty-gritty, huh?¡± ¡°I see no need to waste time on small talk, My Queen.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I nodded. ¡°Let¡¯s get started then.¡± ¡°Sit.¡± He pointed to the chair. I sat down. ¡°Now, first of all¡ª¡± He paced the floor, his hands closed around a whiteboard marker behind his back, that English accent of his more prominent in Teacher Mode, ¡°¡ªmost unlikeable thing you do: tantrums.¡± ¡°Tantrums?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± He grinned, making an overly dramatic point of stomping his foot. ¡°Oh. That.¡± ¡°Yes, that. A queen does not need to stomp her foot to get her own way. You¡¯re on the right track, Ara¡ª¡± He stuffed the marker in his back pocket, ¡°¡ªstanding up for what you believe, making decisions and seeing that people follow them. It¡¯s what you need to do. But you don¡¯t need to stomp your foot to do it.¡± ¡°I never even realised I was.¡± ¡°I know.¡± He squatted in front of me and delicately took my hand until I looked at him. ¡°And, this isn¡¯t a pick-on-Ara session, either. I just want to point out a few things that need to change if you¡¯re to earn the respect you actually deserve.¡± Page 14 ¡°Okay.¡± I drew my hand back. ¡°So, no foot-stomping.¡±Advertisement ¡°Right. And every time I see you do it, I¡¯m going to throw something at you, or maybe pinch you,¡± he said, probably imagining it. ¡°Okay. I give you official permission to pinch me if I do.¡± ¡°Excellent. Now¡ª¡± He joined his hands and stood up again. ¡°One of the other annoying things you do¡ª¡± I sat forward, listening eagerly. ¡°I¡¯ve watched you with Arthur, with Mike, even with David, and one thing I can say that¡¯s consistent about you, girl, is you tend to believe whatever whoever you¡¯re talking to at the time says.¡± ¡°What¡¯d you mean?¡± ¡°There¡¯s a lot of mystery and history surrounding our past and possibly shaping our future as a nation, and you seem to believe too easily what you¡¯re told you need to do¡ªor even to believe.¡± ¡°Like what?¡± ¡°Take this prophecy for example. What do you actually believe about it?¡± ¡°I¡­¡± I considered all Arthur¡¯s points, the things Jason taught me in the library the day he translated the scrolls, and all the things Morgaine had told me in the beginning¡ªthings I took as fact, that now turned out to be so far from the truth they weren¡¯t even worth remembering. ¡°I¡¯m leaning more toward it being a contract, not a prophecy.¡± ¡°And what about the power of your foretold child?¡± ¡°The power to free the Damned?¡± He nodded once. ¡°I . . . I think I can free them.¡± I waved my fingertips in the air. ¡°And what about Drake coming for your child. What do you believe about that?¡± ¡°I believe there¡¯s a reason he wants her dead. Maybe she turns out to be the devil. I don¡¯t know, but we can¡¯t just rule him as the bad guy because he seeks to kill her. I think we should have a heavily guarded sit-down meet, and talk about it all.¡± Blade smiled. ¡°And why hasn¡¯t this been done?¡± ¡°Because no one else agrees with me.¡± ¡°And . . . who has all the power in this monarchy?¡± I sat straighter. ¡°The queen.¡± ¡°Precisely. So, I reiterate¡ª¡± He knelt before me, his elbow on his knee. ¡°Why hasn¡¯t it been done?¡± ¡°You¡¯re right.¡± I stood up, forcing him to shift backward quickly. ¡°I need a plan. I need to think about what to ask Drake, and I need to organise to meet with him.¡± ¡°But your people,¡± he gasped dramatically, like a shocked old woman, rising to his feet, ¡°they won¡¯t like it.¡± ¡°Well, it¡¯s my decision. I may be young, but I¡¯m not stupid.¡± ¡°I think they¡¯ll fight you on this.¡± ¡°Then I¡¯ll damn well overrule them,¡± I said, stomping my foot. ¡°Ouch!¡± I swiped Blade''s hand off my arm, cupping my sore skin. ¡°You pinched me!¡± ¡°You stomped your foot. Try again.¡± I walked cautiously away from him and stood across the room, looking out the window. ¡°A meeting with Drake, in person, to talk¡ªsift through the lies and webs in this whole prophecy¡ªis what¡¯s best for my people. War leads to death. And secrecy¡ª¡± I turned around to look at Blade. ¡°It begets secrecy. I need to flush this out.¡± ¡°Okay. So, now you believe that for yourself, what will you do?¡± ¡°Tell them that¡¯s the plan.¡± ¡°Tell whom?¡± ¡°My people, my council, my House. And they will go along with it, because anyone who opposes will be asked to step down.¡± Blade appeared beside me, the dark shadows shaping his smile. ¡°That¡¯s my girl. And when they oppose you¡ªwhich they will¡ªwhat will be your immediate reaction?¡± I pictured myself in front of the House, standing at the head of the boardroom table, calm, taking slow breaths, staying silent until they all finished arguing around me. ¡°I¡¯ll whisper,¡± I said, ¡°to get their attention. I¡¯ll tell them this is the plan. Tell them, including David, that I overrule them.¡± ¡°Just tell them?¡± he prompted. ¡°No yelling?¡± ¡°I think quiet repetition should suffice.¡± The corners of my lips pulled outward, making me smile. ¡°And¡­how do you know this is the right course of action? How do you know I¡¯m not leading you into some trap, bending you to my will?¡± ¡°Because I trust you.¡± ¡°You trust Arthur. You trust Morgaine. You trust¡ª¡± ¡°Point taken. But¡­¡± I exhaled softly, touching my chest. ¡°Blade, I¡¯m following my own heart. Often, when people tell me something or ask me to do something, I do it because I¡¯m trying to be the queen I¡¯m supposed to be, even if it feels wrong. But I don¡¯t care about that anymore. I care about doing what¡¯s best for everyone¡ªfor my people and my family, myself last. What they think of me doesn¡¯t really matter anymore. So, if I do what I always think is right, then I¡¯m choosing who to trust, not just walking blindly, guided by every voice of reason I hear.¡± He clapped his hands once, then again, and again, getting faster and faster until it was a full-blown applause. I took a soft bow. ¡°See?¡± he said. ¡°I don¡¯t really need to teach you anything about being queen, Ara. I just need to shine some light on what you already know.¡± He touched my shoulder. ¡°You¡¯re a good person. You may take longer than everyone else to figure out how to rule your own roost, but I¡¯d take a good soul as queen any day over a judicial prick.¡± ¡°Thank you, Blade.¡± I hugged him, wondering if that comment was a stab at David. ¡°I think I just¡­it helps having someone believe in me, you know?¡± ¡°We all want to believe in you, Ara. Some of us are just afraid.¡± ¡°Why?¡± I sat down on the chair. ¡°It¡¯s like falling in love.¡± He leaned his butt on the table beside me again, taking the marker out of his back pocket. ¡°We need this¡ªthis queen, the safety, the protection, so bad that we¡¯re scared, if we hope, it¡¯ll all fall apart.¡± Those words rung true deep within me. ¡°I know how that feels almost better than anyone.¡± ¡°I know. And that¡¯s why I know that, even if this not-yet-conceived child does turn out to be the devil, and that¡¯s why Drake wants her dead, you¡¯d kill her in a heartbeat¡ª¡± He held up a finger. ¡°After checking your facts, first.¡± I nodded, smiling. ¡°Yes. Fact checking. My new instant reaction.¡± ¡°Right. And calm breath, too. When you¡¯re about to stomp your foot, just remember, you don¡¯t have to. Being queen means you are one big foot-stomp. What you say goes, pretty little thing, so don¡¯t feel as if you have to yell and scream about it.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I grinned. ¡°Well, on the bright side, I guess this prepares me for parenting, too. Can¡¯t have two foot-stomping teenagers under one roof.¡± ¡°No.¡± He laughed. ¡°We certainly can¡¯t.¡± Almost as if my stomach despised this as much as me, it groaned when I reached the field bordering the training hall. This week went by so fast, with so many things to take care of and so many discussions at dinner, I wasn''t really sure I¡¯d eaten anything human. I touched the back of my wrist, running a finger over the raised vein there, thinking about Eric, wondering where he was, what he was doing. ¡°Hey, gorgeous. What you doin¡¯?¡± Mike said, catching up to me at a slight run. ¡°Studying my veins.¡± I showed him my wrist. ¡°Eric told me that when they look like this, I''m blood hungry.¡± ¡°When was the last time you had blood?¡± He took my hand in his, flipping it over to look at my skin carefully. ¡°This morning.¡± He laughed and poked me in the ribs. ¡°I''m gonna call you Miss Piggy.¡± ¡°Shut up.¡± I backhanded him. ¡°Where¡¯s David? I¡¯ll eat from him before we start training.¡± ¡°He¡¯s already in there.¡± ¡°Okay. Cool.¡± We both took a step forward, but though Mike moved, I stayed stuck on the spot, caught by my lace under the sole of my shoe. ¡°How many times do I have to tell you to tie that up?¡± Mike groaned, glancing back. ¡°Crud.¡± I lifted my foot and released the lace, ergo freeing my halted steps. ¡°You go ahead. I¡¯ll meet you in there,¡± I said. ¡°From the sounds of that fight, I think David''s opponent needs some medical attention.¡± Mike grinned, listening. ¡°He¡¯s up against Falcon. This should be good.¡± I smiled as he bounded away like a little boy heading to a mud puddle. ¡°Sorry about that,¡± Jason said, springing up out of nowhere. ¡°About what?¡± ¡°Your shoelace.¡± He pointed down; it was already done back up. ¡°You did that?¡± He nodded. ¡°I needed you alone.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°They won''t let me train with you.¡± He jerked his thumb to the training hall. ¡°Or even watch, because I''m not a Council or Core member. But I need to be close when you shoot that energy of yours. I want to get a reading¡ªsee what it¡¯s made up of.¡± ¡°Well, can''t you tell David it¡¯s for research purposes?¡± ¡°I did. He told me I wasn''t to conduct any tests on you until the House had time to go over my proposal for the lab.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± I frowned. ¡°So, do you want me to shoot a bolt out the door for you?¡± ¡°If you could.¡± He grinned. ¡°I''ve got my equipment set up in the bushes just across from the doors. I just need about three seconds of that light.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I nodded. ¡°I¡¯ll do my best.¡± ¡°And¡­¡± He looked at my face, right above my eye, and ran his thumb along my brow. ¡°Don''t worry about the pain, Ara. I¡¯ll figure this out, okay. I¡¯ll find a way to stop the headaches.¡± I nodded, closing my eyes. ¡°Thanks, Jase.¡± ¡°You lost, Queeny?¡± Quaid called out. ¡°No, I was just talking to¡ª¡± I started, but he was gone when I opened my eyes, ¡°¡ªmyself.¡± ¡°Nothing new there,¡± Quaid said with a laugh. ¡°So, who you shooting today?¡± I wriggled my fingers in the air. ¡°You wanna be my victim?¡± He stepped back, palms raised. ¡°It took me a week to get over the last shot. Use Falcon.¡± ¡°Can''t. He¡¯s fighting David right now.¡± ¡°Ooh.¡± Quaid looked at the training hall. ¡°Come on then. We better get in there and help him.¡± As we reached the entrance, though, Mike and Blade walked past with an unconscious Falcon between them. Page 15 ¡°Is he okay?¡± I asked.Advertisement ¡°Yeah, he¡¯s fine.¡± Blade winked at me. ¡°King David snapped his neck as he went down.¡± My eyes expanded to take in the horror of Falcon¡¯s lopsided head for a second, drifting slowly onto David after. He stood proudly in the mirrored sparring section, flexing his fists, looking kind of evil and very satisfied with himself. ¡°What¡¯s the deal?¡± I stormed over and stood right in front of him, nearly slipping in the blood. He caught me by the arm and steadied me. ¡°What¡¯s what deal?¡± ¡°Why¡¯d you snap his neck? We don''t spar like that here, David.¡± ¡°Relax.¡± He turned away and grabbed a towel off the bench to wipe his hands. ¡°He¡¯ll be fine.¡± ¡°No, he¡¯s gonna have a hell of a sore neck for the next few days. What¡¯s gotten into you?¡± He sat down, breathing out through his nose. ¡°I didn''t mean to snap his neck. I just¡­got a little carried away.¡± I looked out the window as Mike and Blade passed. ¡°Looks like a bad case of venting on the innocent.¡± He half smiled. ¡°You¡¯re probably right.¡± ¡°So?¡± I sat down beside him. ¡°What are you venting? What''s bothering you?¡± ¡°We¡¯ll talk later. For now¡ª¡± He stood up and aimed his voice around the room. ¡°Let¡¯s have a volunteer for Ara¡¯s target practice.¡± While the knights murmured amongst themselves, probably drawing straws, I looked to the bushes outside the door, knowing Jase was in there, watching. It made me feel better in some ways. David delivered my target to the centre of the room, and the rest of the knights took a giant step backward, blocking the clearing from me to the door¡ªto Jason. ¡°You guys might want to move,¡± I said, parting the air. ¡°If I need to throw up after this, I¡¯ll have to run outside.¡± They parted quickly, and I caught the soft scent of Jase¡¯s breath from the small laugh I heard. I smiled. Mike wandered back in and took his place beside David. ¡°Okay, Ara. Today I want you to shoot him back to the wall, and when he¡¯s down, I¡¯ll be sending in a few more. And they will hurt you if you don''t strike them down.¡± I looked at David, who eyed Mike, disapproval trickling over his shoulders like rain. ¡°Relax,¡± Mike said to David, without even looking his way. ¡°She can handle it.¡± David shook his head and sat down on the bench. ¡°Make it count, Ara. I really don''t want sit here and watch other men beat you. And I make no guarantees that I won¡¯t step in again.¡± I grinned at him. ¡°Mike will kick you out of training if you do what you did last time.¡± He sat taller, his concern slipping with a returning grin. ¡°Then make sure you flatten them, my love, or I will make sure no one ever wants to spar with you again.¡± ¡°David, shut up and let the girl spar,¡± Mike said. David laughed and issued a hand in offering of the floor. ¡°Be my guest.¡± The knight across from me looked nervous. He not only had to attack the queen in presence of the king but, if he didn¡¯t, he¡¯d be jolted with a bolt of really hot, electrifying energy that would most likely put him in a coma for a few days or, best case scenario, he pins me down, renders me unconscious and avoids my blast, then ends up with the king snapping his neck like exhibit A: Falcon. ¡°Shoot, Ara,¡± Mike said, folding his arms. I looked at my hands and took a deep breath, feeling the charge rise in them, moving up my arms and joining at the centre of my chest. It vibrated, building there until, like water rising in a tub, gradually moved up my neck and into my head, bringing the tight sensation with it. I felt a bit like a pirate, with my right eye all screwed up from the pain. The knight parted his feet, scooping low to lunge toward me, and time slowed down. I held my breath and forced the heat from my palms, imagining it going into the knight¡¯s chest. And as usual, it did. I never felt as if I had any control over it. I felt it leave my body, felt it hit him and ignite his shirt, felt the heat, felt his pain, heard his scream, but didn''t feel as though I did it. It was more like watching it on a screen in front of me. Then, the pain set in. I dropped my hands, the static ceasing, and grabbed my temples. ¡°Keep going, Ara,¡± Mike ordered. ¡°That wasn¡¯t even two seconds.¡± ¡°Ah!¡± I bit my teeth together, vaguely noticing a knight come at me from the side; my eyes darted to David, who stood, then back to the knight. If I didn''t shoot this guy, David would do much worse. I sent a bolt in his direction. It was small and did nothing but make him shake. He dusted his chest off and came at me again. ¡°Two more men,¡± Mike called, and the fight was over. I was surrounded. My heels slipped in Falcon¡¯s blood as I turned to run, sending me in a sideways skid until I landed against the mirror beside me, and all the pain in my head shifted suddenly to the right, making my jaw fall open. ¡°Ara?¡± David walked closer, his hand out. ¡°Are you okay?¡± As I looked up to answer, three men shoved past him, diving in my direction. I shut my eyes tight and aimed again, focusing, trying harder to make this one count, and as I felt the light go through a chest, I flicked my hand outward, pushing it in Jason¡¯s direction. ¡°Holy shit!¡± Mike said, and a whole room full of amalgamated gasps followed. ¡°What?¡± My eyes flung open, but instead of sixty faces staring at me, they were all staring at the bushes outside¡ªthe knight lying in a tangled heap among them. ¡°Did I do that?¡± I rolled up to stand, searching for Jason. Mike and several others ran over to the frying knight, and David¡¯s hand came down on my arm. ¡°My love, are you okay?¡± I nodded, but I wasn¡¯t okay. ¡°Stand straight,¡± he said, trying to help me. ¡°I can''t.¡± My knees wobbled. ¡°It¡¯s really bad. What happened out there?¡± ¡°You threw him. You picked him up about three feet off the ground and ditched him outside.¡± ¡°How is that possible?¡± I looked on as they rescued the man and helped him to his feet. ¡°It¡¯s static electricity, isn''t it? How can I possibly move things with it?¡± ¡°I don''t know.¡± He hugged me close to his bare chest; it was the first time I¡¯d felt his skin against my cheek in a few days, and it made me take a quick breath. ¡°You okay, my love?¡± ¡°Yeah. I just forgot how nice our skin felt together.¡± He looked down lovingly, but his hand came up quick, gently wiping under my nose as the salty taste of my own blood fell onto my lip. ¡°I think we might''ve pushed you too hard.¡± I touched the blood. ¡°My head feels cold.¡± ¡°Okay,¡± Mike said, clapping his hands once. ¡°One more round and we¡¯ll call it quits for the day.¡± ¡°She¡¯s bleeding, Mike.¡± David turned me around. Mike stopped in his tracks. ¡°Ara, what happened?¡± ¡°David punched me,¡± I joked. ¡°Are you okay?¡± He licked his thumb and wiped it across my lip. ¡°Do you want to lie down for a minute?¡± I did want to, but I wanted to get this training session over with more. ¡°No. I''m okay. I''m getting stronger, right?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± Mike laughed. ¡°Quite a bit stronger.¡± ¡°Okay then.¡± I stepped away from David''s arms; the pain had moved to the base of my skull now, slowly retreating down my spine. ¡°Who¡¯s next?¡± Mike, David said in his thoughts, his tone coming through with that cheeky smile I just knew he was wearing. I grinned, rubbed my hands together, and as I wiped them away, flung a bolt at Mike. He cried out as he went down, clutching his arm. David laughed loudly, slapping his knee, paralysed by hilarity. So I sent one at him, but he ducked, sweeping forward in a quick move, grabbing me at the waist and flipping me up into his arms like a damsel in distress. ¡°Nice try.¡± ¡°How¡¯d you know I was gonna do that?¡± I asked, ignoring the searing in my brain. ¡°I can read your mind, pretty girl. Even if I can''t actually read it right now.¡± I laughed, but as the jiggle from my stomach moved up to my chest, the pain shifted again, pushing out on both sides of my head in a pressure-building explosion, just waiting to erupt. ¡°David?¡± ¡°What¡¯s wrong?¡± He laid me on the ground; Mike stumbled to his feet, muttering something about revenge, and came to kneel beside me. ¡°Lay her on her side.¡± His big hands cupped my ribs and he flipped me over, placing a shirt under my head. ¡°Trent, get that stuff Arthur gave us.¡± I couldn¡¯t open my eyes, but I felt David there beside me, felt his hand on my brow, heard his words in my ear while he soothingly rubbed my body and stroked my hair. ¡°David?¡± I whispered. ¡°Yes, my love¡­my love¡­love¡­¡± ¡°Just stay. Don''t go.¡± ¡°I''m not going anywhere¡­where¡­where¡­¡± The dry scent of cinnamon and coriander and number of other herbs filled my head, taking out all the volume and the ringing in my ears. I knew what was next. I held my breath, waiting for it to travel into my lungs and spin my world around, taking me down to the darkness for the next eight hours. ¡°Love you,¡± I whispered with the breath I¡¯d held. Chapter Four I ran down the stairs, catching Jason¡¯s sleeve as he reached for the front door. ¡°Hey, did you hear?¡± ¡°About the labs?¡± he said solemnly. ¡°Yeah.¡± I stepped back a little. ¡°I thought you¡¯d be a bit happier.¡± He frowned, making his eyes smaller. ¡°He didn''t tell you, did he?¡± ¡°Who didn''t tell me what?¡± ¡°The king approved a lab and greenhouse on the rooftop for Arthur,¡± he said spitefully. ¡°But declined my proposal.¡± I sunk back on my heels. ¡°Why?¡± He smirked. ¡°A scientific study into the possibility of you being the power to free the Damned would involve long hours of time spent in each other¡¯s company.¡± He started walking away. ¡°Why do you think he disapproved it?¡± ¡°I''m sorry, Jase,¡± I called. ¡°I¡¯ll talk to him.¡± He turned back as he reached the door. ¡°I¡¯ve known him for over a hundred years, Ara. If even the prospect of freeing the Damned couldn''t change his mind, you won''t have a hope in hell.¡± ¡°David!¡± He spun around, placing his book down on the dresser as his smile dropped. ¡°My love, what¡¯s wrong?¡± ¡°You are what¡¯s wrong.¡± I poked his chest, coming to stop beside him as the bedroom door slammed shut. ¡°Why did you deny Jason¡¯s proposal for a lab?¡± Page 16 He turned away, groaning. ¡°It¡¯s not necessary.¡±Advertisement ¡°Not necessary? Not necessary.¡± I grabbed his arm and made him turn back to me. ¡°David, we need to study my powers. We¡ª¡± ¡°Mike is doing fine with what he¡¯s got going on in the training hall. I¡¯ve seen his notes.¡± ¡°His notes! So you''ve seen how every time he put me in that cage, every time he makes me shoot things, I practically go into a coma for the next eight hours in excruciating pain! And you think this is okay?¡± ¡°Like he says, you just need to exercise it.¡± ¡°Are you kidding me? David.¡± I stopped, taking a few deep breaths. ¡°It starts hearts.¡± I held up my hand. ¡°What if it can turn a vampire back to a human?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know if I believe in that anymore, Ara.¡± My eyes welled with hot tears. ¡°But what if I do?¡± He sighed, taking both my arms. ¡°My love, there are more important things to worry about now.¡± ¡°But¡ª¡± ¡°I don''t want to hear any more. Look¡ª¡± He kissed my forehead, swiping a cold tear from my cheek. ¡°Maybe once this business with Drake is put to rest, I¡¯ll approve a research division. Okay? But not now. Not while we have so many other things to focus on.¡± ¡°But it wouldn¡¯t be a problem for you. This is on Jason¡ªit¡¯s his project. He won''t get in your way,¡± I said, hopeful. ¡°It¡¯s not open for discussion.¡± ¡°But¡­¡± I followed him across the room. ¡°If you''re worried about he and I being alone, you can put a guard on me. I¡ª¡± ¡°Ara, please. I''m trying to pack. Can you¡­¡± He pinched the bridge of his nose. ¡°We¡¯ll discuss this when I return from Elysium on Monday.¡± ¡°No, we won''t.¡± I spun away. ¡°You¡¯re just brushing it off, like you always do.¡± He appeared behind me, his fingers grasping my arm. ¡°Let¡¯s get something monumentally clear here, my dear, sweet girl. I brush nothing off. And, yeah, maybe I''m hesitant to discuss this with you, because there''s nothing to discuss. I won''t approve a lab for Jason as a guise for him to spend time alone with you.¡± ¡°That''s not what it is. Do you have no faith in him at all?¡± ¡°Not when it comes to you.¡± ¡°Yet you trust Arthur,¡± I said spitefully. ¡°What¡¯s that supposed to mean?¡± I wanted to say that if he was worried about anyone trying to have sex with me, it should be his uncle, not Jason, but I was pretty sure that would result in Arthur¡¯s death. And as I looked up into his troubled eyes, the exhaustion of everything came down on top of me. My lip quivered. ¡°I can''t do this anymore, David.¡± ¡°What, my love?¡± He pulled me close, my nice, loving David returning. ¡°I''m sorry. I know you don''t want Jason and I to hang out, but he''s trying to find a way to make my pain stop.¡± ¡°It¡¯s not going to stop, Ara. He¡¯s putting ideas into your head.¡± ¡°Is he? Or is it that you don¡¯t want me to have any friends?¡± ¡°How can you say something like that?¡± He pulled away. ¡°I¡¯m not that sort of man, Ara, you know that.¡± ¡°Do I?¡± ¡°Ara, please?¡± His tone broke at the same time as his heart. ¡°David,¡± I said, exhaling. ¡°Jason is my only real friend. He''s the only one in this whole place who has my back, no matter what I do wrong.¡± ¡°What do you mean? What about me?¡± ¡°No. You''re lying to me all the time. I can''t trust anything you say.¡± ¡°Lying?¡± The skin on his forehead moved downward, bunching into a frown. ¡°Ara, what makes you think I''m lying to you?¡± ¡°So many things.¡± I shook my head, laughing to myself. ¡°My love, please. Talk to me.¡± ¡°Well, for one, you told me I descended from Evangeline''s bloodline, and now you tell me she died as a child, and you told me¡ª¡± ¡°Hold on.¡± He put a finger up. ¡°When I told you that story, I believed it to be correct. All I had learned came from Lilithian History books in our library. I told you what I knew to be the truth.¡± ¡°Really?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± He brushed my hair off my face. ¡°And these aren¡¯t the only half-truths we¡¯ve all been told. You have to trust me, Ara. I did not tell you those stories to steer you in the wrong direction. If anything, ask Arthur why he never told you the truth. Ask him, or any other High Vampire Councillor, why they never corrected myself or any other vampire.¡± ¡°And, you see? That¡¯s just it. Everyone keeps the truth so buried no one even knows what''s true anymore. I mean, I came here believing Drake took revenge on all Lilithians because Lilith wanted to kill him, and now I''m told it¡¯s because Lilith killed Anandene.¡± ¡°No. Anandene left Drake¡ªbetrayed him. She ran off with one of the council leaders.¡± ¡°That''s not what Arthur told me.¡± David looked down at his clasped hands, frowning. ¡°What else did he tell you?¡± ¡°He told me not to discuss this with anyone.¡± His lip tugged on one side, making his whole face softer with that smile. ¡°You can tell me. I''m your husband.¡± I nodded. ¡°I know. That¡¯s kind of why I''m telling you. I just¡­¡± I wandered over and sat on the box at the end of our bed. ¡°I''m getting lost in this web of lies, David, and I don''t really know who to trust.¡± ¡°Trust me.¡± He offered his hand. I took it. ¡°I''m trying.¡± ¡°Ara, trying isn¡¯t good enough. What reason on God¡¯s good earth would you have not to trust the one person in the world who always has your best interests at heart?¡± ¡°Because that one person is also willing to do things I don¡¯t necessarily agree with in order to protect me.¡± He placed his other hand over mine. ¡°And I will do that whether you trust me with your truths or not. Nothing will change that.¡± I allowed a small smile. ¡°Now, tell me what you know about Anandene.¡± ¡°Arthur told me that she cast a spell using the Stone of Truth, and it brought a curse on the lands¡ªmany people died. Lilith had to slay Anandene on the Stone to end the curse. Drake offered his life up, but Lilith tricked him, captured him and imprisoned him until Anandene was dead. There was nothing he could do to save her.¡± David swallowed, lowering his hands to his knees as he walked backward and sat on the box. ¡°He never told me that.¡± ¡°Who?¡± ¡°Drake.¡± ¡°He told you things?¡± He nodded, his thoughts lost in some other place. ¡°That¡¯s . . . that¡¯s really awful.¡± I nodded. ¡°Yep. And, so, that¡¯s why he killed Lilith, not because he wanted the throne.¡± ¡°That makes so much more sense.¡± David nodded again. ¡°There are so many lies layered over the top of lies. I can hardly see the truth under it all.¡± ¡°Do you think Arthur was lying about that story?¡± He shook his head. ¡°No. That¡¯s the first time I''ve heard anything of it, which means it¡¯s probably true.¡± ¡°So, then, what do you think about Drake wanting our child dead?¡± He swiped a hand down his face, sighing, then slid his butt across the box and flopped back on the bed. ¡°I don''t care about that part of the story, Ara. The fact is that he¡¯ll never even get half a chance to contemplate the idea of possibly making a plan to kill our child. I won''t let that happen.¡± I moved over and sat right by his waist, running my finger along the belt-line of his jeans. ¡°And, what are you going to do about it?¡± ¡°I don''t know.¡± ¡°Kill him with the Dagger of Yahanna?¡± He sat up on his elbow. ¡°How do you know about that?¡± I shrugged. ¡°I''m not as dumb as I look.¡± ¡°Arthur told you?¡± I nodded. ¡°Why would he do that?¡± he said to himself, flopping back on the bed again. ¡°He¡­¡± I divided truths in my head and carefully chose which ones to share. ¡°He wanted to prepare me for the fact that you were going to die.¡± His chest stopped lifting, his body becoming immensely still, only his throat moving as he obviously swallowed all the grief he was holding but would never share. ¡°David?¡± ¡°Mm?¡± ¡°Why didn''t you tell me about the dagger?¡± He sighed and rolled up on his elbow, placing his hand firmly over mine. ¡°I didn''t want to break your heart. We fought so hard to be together, and you¡ª¡± He squeezed my hand. ¡°You wanted to die after you were tortured. And that was only because you thought I was dead. So, what would happen to you if you had to be here, alone, ruling, doing things you didn''t believe you were capable of, if you also had the burden of losing me?¡± My eyes watered. ¡°I''m sorry I didn''t tell you, Ara. I am. I wanted to, and that¡¯s why I stayed away. In fact, I laid here¡ª¡± He pointed to the pillows. ¡°I came to you one night, laid here for hours telling you everything, and in that one perfect moment, as I stroked your cheek, you smiled, and for the first time ever in my life, I felt like everything would be okay.¡± I laid a hand gently to his cheek. ¡°It will.¡± ¡°No.¡± He pulled away. ¡°It won¡¯t. It can¡¯t be, and that single moment I let myself believe it would caused more pain than I ever knew existed, because I was forced to realise then that I¡¯d never feel like that again.¡± ¡°But it doesn''t have to be that way, David.¡± I grabbed his hand and held it tight. ¡°You don''t have to kill Drake.¡± ¡°Yes, I do. He will come for you, Ara. He will come for our baby one day, and I can''t¡ª¡± He shook his head, searching for words. ¡°I can''t live with that fear. I need you safe. I need our people safe.¡± ¡°I won''t lose you,¡± I said, and it was non-negotiable. He looked at me, seeing my thoughts, seeing my strengths, but none of what I felt seemed to matter to him at all. ¡°You will, Ara. There is no choice. It takes the hand of a king to use that dagger, and I am the only king.¡± ¡°There are hundreds of people who would take that role and kill Drake, David. It doesn''t have to be you.¡± ¡°I am the only rightful king,¡± his voice grew louder. ¡°There are ways around it,¡± I said sternly. And his body shifted, his shoulders going back as he saw the words in my mind: king by right of heir. ¡°No.¡± ¡°Why?¡± I stood up as he appeared across the room by the fireplace. Page 17 ¡°Just¡­no.¡±Advertisement ¡°David, I would do anything to¡ª¡± ¡°It¡¯s out of the question.¡± ¡°But it would save our forever.¡± ¡°No. It would destroy it, Ara!¡± He spun around to look at me. ¡°Do you think I would ever be able to touch you again if you¡¯d been with another man?¡± I sunk back a bit. ¡°I wouldn¡¯t have to sleep with anyone to do it.¡± He frowned at me. ¡°IVF, turkey baster¡­¡± I suggested. He turned away. ¡°I couldn¡¯t live with myself if you had to go through that just to save me.¡± ¡°But you¡¯d be living. And I know, from experience, that you can get past just about anything that happens to you, David. You were burned on the fire¡ªyou caught me with my legs around Mike. You can get past a damn turkey baster.¡± He went ultra still and ultra quiet for a second, then turned around again, his whole body shaking with laughter. ¡°What are you laughing at?¡± I asked, trying not to smile. ¡°Turkey baster.¡± And I couldn¡¯t help it. I laughed too. He wandered over and placed a hand to the back of my neck, pulling me in for a kiss on the brow, my favourite kind of kiss. ¡°My love, it¡¯s a good idea, but I''m the king. It¡¯s my job to die for our people¡ªfor you. I swore that in my oath, and that is what I¡¯ll do.¡± I stepped back. ¡°No.¡± He smiled conceitedly. ¡°You have no say. Arthur gave me the dagger, Ara. I''m leaving for Paris in a month to kill Drake, and you can either enjoy this time with me, or you can waste it being mad.¡± Paris? Which meant Arthur hadn''t given him the real dagger, because I knew, and Arthur knew, that Drake was in Romania. I propped my hands on my hips, a challenging grin marking my lips. ¡°Fine. I¡¯ll take door number two.¡± ¡°Ara, be reasonable.¡± ¡°Me? Me be reasonable? You¡¯re talking about going to your death, taking our forever and throwing it away, and I don''t get any say!¡± I leaned forward on each word. ¡°And you just think I should sit back and take it!¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°No!¡± I stomped my foot. ¡°I won''t, David. If you go . . . if you go to kill him, I . . . I¡¯ll do something stupid while you''re gone.¡± He stepped into me. ¡°Like what?¡± I shrugged out of his grip. ¡°I¡¯ll sleep with Arthur and make him king.¡± His jaw dropped. ¡°You wouldn¡¯t dare.¡± I held strong; my shoulders straight, head high. ¡°Ara.¡± He grabbed my arm firmly. ¡°If you touch him¡ª¡± He shook his head, his teeth like a cage behind his lips. ¡°If you . . . I¡¯ll kill him. And God help me, Ara, I wouldn''t be able to stop myself.¡± He dropped my arm and turned away. ¡°So, if you think for one second that having a child with him will save our forever, you¡¯re wrong.¡± ¡°No. I''m not, because it¡¯d mean you¡¯d be alive.¡± ¡°But I will hate you.¡± ¡°I can live with that better than your death.¡± His eyes narrowed, the stern, scary David resting just behind that green gaze. ¡°I am going to tell you something, young lady, and you are going to listen.¡± He grabbed both my arms and moved me to sit on the chair. I plonked down clumsily, keeping my eyes on David''s as he squatted in front of me, composing himself. ¡°You will do as you are told. I am king, and I will kill Drake. I will not have you touching or carrying the child of another man.¡± His voice shook with anger. ¡°This will not be negotiated, and if you even think about going against me, I will have you locked in a cell until word of Drake''s death has been received. Do I make myself clear?¡± The little girl inside me shook, nodding her head, but the woman I felt growing deep in my soul every day stood taller, readying her sword. ¡°You can''t ask me to accept your death, David.¡± ¡°I''m not.¡± He stood up. ¡°I''m telling you to.¡± ¡°God!¡± I stood up too, and stomped my foot again. ¡°Why do you have to be like this? I''m not one of your minions. I''m not someone you can boss around. I am the goddamn queen, and I! Have power! Over you! Maybe I¡¯ll lock you in a cell, and not let you out until I kill Drake.¡± He rushed up beside me and grabbed my arm again. ¡°You stubborn, spoiled little brat.¡± I tugged away. ¡°I¡¯d rather be a brat in a world where you''re alive than an obedient wife in a world where you''re dead.¡± He walked away and sat down on the coffee table in the sitting room, running both hands through his hair. ¡°I can''t fight with you, my love. I can''t. I won''t. I have to kill Drake. I''m sorry. I know that means I''m giving up our forever, but I had hoped to at least leave you with a child before I left.¡± ¡°So I could be a single, teenage mom!¡± He sighed. ¡°You always wanted a family, Ara. A little Harry, and¡ª¡± ¡°But it won''t be a little Harry, David. I can''t even fall pregnant.¡± My voice broke. ¡°And Lilithians don''t have boys. We have girls.¡± ¡°So you don''t want a child because you don''t want a girl.¡± ¡°I never said that!¡± I screamed. ¡°I''m just saying¡­I don''t want this. Any of this. I wanted a family: a mum and a dad and a baby. Not an eternity without you. You''re all I have ever wanted to live for. If you take that way, then I have nothing left!¡± He softened a little. ¡°I know. Okay. I know. But you''re strong¡ªstronger than any of us have ever given you credit for, and you will get through this.¡± ¡°No.¡± I shook my lowered head. ¡°I won''t.¡± He appeared a step away from me, testing the waters. ¡°You will.¡± ¡°You¡¯re wrong. And, if you¡¯re so hell-bent on dying for us, then¡ª¡± I looked up at him, my jaw stiff, sight blinded by tears. ¡°I want a divorce.¡± ¡°What?¡± He closed the gap between us quickly, his green eyes wide. ¡°You heard me.¡± I shuffled my feet, standing a little taller in the domination of his height. ¡°I love you, David, enough that I am willing to do anything to keep you alive, even if that means I can''t be with you anymore.¡± ¡°And what then? You¡¯re just gonna go out and fuck some random stranger!¡± He sunk back on his heels, dropping his arm to his side as a flash image of Jason came to the front of his thoughts. ¡°Or maybe not a stranger.¡± ¡°Don''t go there, David. I didn''t have anyone in mind. I''m just trying to wake you up and make you see that you can''t make decisions like this without me. I have a say.¡± I pointed to my chest. ¡°You''re my husband and I don''t want you to be dead for forever. Don''t you remember? Have you forgotten what you told me about how vampires love eternally?¡± ¡°No,¡± he said, looking down. ¡°Then what makes you think it¡¯s okay to leave me, to just die and not care how it makes me feel?¡± ¡°You think I don''t care?¡± he yelled. ¡°Ara, I am the only one who actually does care how you feel. I am the one who came after you when my brother was torturing you. I''m the one who laid burning in a fire, alive, to save our forever, and it was all for nothing, because as soon as those scars healed, my heart was torn open again by this¡ª¡± he presented the air, as if everything we were discussing was laying out in front of us, ¡°¡ªby this truth that I battled with long before you ever even noticed I was struggling with something. I''ve had to deal with this. I''ve had to think long and hard about letting Drake live, running for the rest of our lives, or killing him and leaving the one girl I never wanted to hurt alone, forever, to fall into who-knows-whose arms.¡± He stepped back, rubbing his hairline, his voice shaking on the brink of tears. ¡°So don''t tell me I don''t care how you feel, Ara, because it is all I care about.¡± My fingers had wrapped so tight around the key on my necklace that, as I dropped my hands, too much blood came rushing back into it. ¡°There has to be something we can do.¡± He reached across and placed his hands on both my shoulders. ¡°There is. Enjoy the last few months we have¡ªmake some memories, maybe make a baby.¡± ¡°And you¡¯ll leave before she¡¯s even born?¡± ¡°This is just how it has to be,¡± he said coldly, turning away. ¡°Discussion closed.¡± ¡°David?¡± I called, but he disappeared, slamming the bedroom door behind him. I sat on my bed, tearstains drying out my cheeks, and told my dad the best of all my adventures living in Paris, including how my husband just confessed he was going to his death for some noble, supernatural cause. There was no negotiation, Dad, I wrote. He just didn''t care how I felt about it, and there was nothing I could say. He had a point, and I know he¡¯s usually always right. But not this time. He¡¯s doing the wrong thing! What does he think will happen if he just leaves me here¡ªalone? I won''t survive it, Dad. I won¡¯t. I never wanted to live without him, and he won''t reason with me. What am I supposed to do but go behind his back and put a turkey baster where it¡¯s not supposed to go? I don''t want to, Dad. I started crying again. I don''t want to betray him, but he''s left me no choice. I just don¡¯t know how to fix this, how to make it that I won¡¯t lose him. I sobered a little, holding my breath, resting my finger over the ¡®send¡¯ button. ¡°Ara?¡± My door opened slowly, a head of blonde hair popping in between the crack. ¡°Emily.¡± I quickly swiped the tears away and deleted the last paragraph, leaving my email as the chirpy, I''m-doing-well kind my dad really wanted to hear. ¡°What¡¯s up?¡± ¡°Sorry to disturb you. I just¡­can I come in?¡± ¡°Sure.¡± I moved over and patted the spot on the bed next to me. But Emily closed my door and walked over, taking a seat on the foot of my bed instead, her knees facing the dresser as if maybe she had bad news and didn¡¯t want to see my face as she said it. ¡°What¡¯s up, Em?¡± ¡°Blade just told me,¡± she said, as quiet as a mouse. ¡°About what?¡± She drew a jagged breath, wiping her wrist along her nose. ¡°David went to Mike¡ªtold him about this dagger.¡± My blood ran cold. ¡°And . . . what did Mike say?¡± ¡°He. . .¡± She scraped repeatedly at the back of her hand with her thumbnail. ¡°He threw things, yelled, screamed. They fought, but he¡­¡± ¡°He what, Em?¡± I edged forward. She placed both hands slowly on the bed beside her legs. ¡°He promised David he¡¯d take care of you¡ªmake sure you didn''t do anything to stop him.¡± ¡°What!¡± I sat up and shoved my laptop aside. ¡°Why would he do that?¡± Page 18 ¡°David''s kind of right, Ara.¡±Advertisement ¡°How? How is he possibly right to go to his death!¡± Emily braved a sideways glance at me, her shoulders wrapping her ears. ¡°Who else can?¡± ¡°It doesn''t have to be this way. We don''t have to kill Drake. We can reason with him, or¡­I don''t know, anything. But not death. That¡¯s eternal, Emily. Don''t you care?¡± ¡°Of course I care.¡± She spun around on the spot to look at me. ¡°You know I love David. But I love you, too, Ara, and I care about the future of our people, and that means we need you alive because we need an heir to the throne¡ªDavid¡¯s blood or not.¡± I hid my face slowly in my hands. ¡°Why can''t anyone, ever, just take my side?¡± She appeared beside me, sweeping my head against her shoulder. ¡°I''m on your side. But, I¡­I just don''t know how to talk sense to him, Ara. All I can do is accept what he thinks is best and just go along with it.¡± I uncovered my face. ¡°You¡¯re afraid of him.¡± ¡°I''m not afraid of him.¡± ¡°Really?¡± I smirked. ¡°¡¯Cause you . . . you¡¯re kinda pale.¡± She adjusted her seat. ¡°No. I''m just¡­cautious not to aggravate him.¡± I laughed. ¡°Precisely.¡± ¡°I''m not, Ara. Not really.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± We both sat smiling for a few seconds, but inside, a part of me was battling with the other half that thought telling Emily my plan to have a child with Arthur was a bad idea. ¡°What if there was a way I could save him?¡± I said, still talking myself into involving her. ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°What if¡ª¡± I sat up more. ¡°What if there was a way I could crown someone else king?¡± ¡°So David wouldn¡¯t be the one who had to kill Drake?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°Well, I¡¯d say do it. Yeah. Whatever it takes, Ara.¡± She nodded, becoming more convinced by the second. ¡°I''m on your side. If there¡¯s a way we can save him, let¡¯s do it.¡± ¡°It would mean¡­¡± I hesitated. ¡°It could hurt him, though.¡± Her eyes went dark, her chin slowly rolling upward, making her shoulders straight and her spine tall. ¡°You mean jure uxoris.¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°No.¡± She brushed her skirt down her legs as she shot to her feet and took a few steps backward. ¡°No way.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°If you have even half a brain in that head, Ara, you won''t do anything of the sort.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°I''m not getting in the middle of that. If that¡¯s your only plan¡ª¡± She walked over and opened my door. ¡°You''re on your own.¡± ¡°Fine,¡± I said to myself as she slammed it behind her. Every summer, as a little girl, I¡¯d leave the wintry cool of my home in Australia and fly a couple of thousand miles across the sea to my dad¡¯s house. I only ever stayed a few weeks at a time, but it meant everything to him. I knew that as deep as I knew my own soul. Every night, when he¡¯d tuck me in and kiss my head, he¡¯d take a minute or two to sit by my bed and tell me a story¡ªalways some tale about love conquering all¡ªbefore winding the mechanism on the base of my music box, setting it down on my grandmother¡¯s dresser, and closing my bedroom door. I¡¯d fall asleep to the gentle hum of his voice lingering in my ears and the soothing chimes of a lullaby. Now, whenever I hear rusty clicks moving a string of notes toward the end of a song, it always takes me back to the sweetness and innocence of childhood. But, this tune was different. I lay staring at the dome of stained glass above my bed, imagining that little girl in the picture had grown up and lived some amazing life. But the score to my imagined story, chiming through the night from the silver box David gave me the night before our wedding, conflicted the joyous past I tried to create with a quite sombre, rather daunting one¡ªbringing more sorrow and mystery than I think the composer intended. The notes rolled off each other in ghostly succession, the melody so intrinsic it took on what felt like solid form, floating in the summer air above me¡ªa foggy white light, littered with tiny sparkles. No one ever taught me the words¡ªgiven that they were in the Ancient Language, but somehow, I¡¯d sung the translated version the day David died at Elysium. Lying here now, though, I couldn¡¯t recall even one lyric¡ªdidn¡¯t even know the title. ¡°Mort de l¡¯Amore,¡± a small voice whispered. ¡°Death of Love.¡± My eyes moved from the glass dome above to the child beside me. Her golden hair fell in long, crinkled waves over her shoulders, framing the eternally youthful face of pale skin, unblemished by life. She sat toying with the golden apple, spinning it carelessly between her fingertips. ¡°Mort de l¡¯Amore,¡± I said it quietly to myself, sitting up a little. ¡°Do you know the words?¡± She nodded, her small mouth opening, waiting for the gears to spin back around to the song¡¯s beginning. And her voice was high like a child from the choir of angels¡ªthe words of the song touching my ears for the first time, despite once having moved my lips. I closed my eyes and listened for the meaning¡ªcatching a moment of sorrow within it that was quickly retrieved by the deep undertone of love. Eternal love. The words faded away then to nothing but a soft breath, a few seconds after the endnote. Eve looked down as if the golden apple had been mentioned in the lyric, and held it up, giving it a gentle turn to show a small hole in the side. ¡°What is that?¡± I asked. ¡°It¡¯s a keyhole.¡± ¡°A keyhole?¡± I reached for the apple; she drew it away. ¡°What¡¯s inside?¡± ¡°The secrets.¡± ¡°Can you share them with me?¡± Her gaze went to my collarbones. ¡°Only you hold the key.¡± I touched my necklace. ¡°This key?¡± ¡°Perhaps,¡± she said, slowly reaching across to cup my hand with her tiny, cool fingers, then turned my palm upward, laying the apple there. ¡°But the hole is too big for this key.¡± ¡°Then you¡¯re not looking at it properly,¡± she said, and a coy smile moved her lip, her hand coming up a second later to swipe the apple. It rolled, bouncing off my fingers in a series of failed attempts to catch it, hitting the ground with a thud, then disappearing under the bed. ¡°Eve?¡± I looked back at her, but the only thing beside me now was the peacefully sleeping man sprawled out like a starfish, taking up way more than his fair share of the bed. I waited a moment to see if the thud woke him, holding my breath as I watched his chest move rhythmically up and down, the cool air coming from his nose, moving across the sheets and brushing my pinkie where my hand rested, propping my arm up against the sheets. Satisfied he wasn¡¯t planning to wake up and accuse me of conspiring with imagined figures, I rolled onto my belly, hooked one hand to the underside of the bed, and hoisted myself over the edge toward the ground¡ªlifting the bed skirt to search beneath the mattress. The blood rushed into my skull in this half upside-down position, making my eyes want to pop. But I had to find that apple. The only gold things under the bed, though, were the intricately-weaved letters on the spine of the book Petey showed me last month: Aide-Memoire de l¡¯Auress. Auress? I sat up again, frowning. I¡¯d heard that word somewhere before. But couldn¡¯t place my finger on it. Not that it mattered right now anyway. The apple was gone, as if it had never been in my hand in the first place. Yet, I could still feel the chill of Eve¡¯s skin. Maybe it was a dream. Maybe not. But one thing was for sure: that apple held some kind of key to some kind of secret Eve wanted me to know. I¡¯d looked at it many times¡ªspun it around in my fingertips, just as Eve had, but I¡¯d never seen a keyhole there before. What did it all mean? I threw the covers back, my nightdress unravelling in layers of silk around my feet as I wandered over to the fireplace, briefly glancing back to see if I woke David. He didn¡¯t wake, not even when the door to the secret passage squeaked fiercely, as if it¡¯d not been opened in a hundred years. Cobwebs broke across my nose and throat as I walked the dark steps downward, placing my toes gently to each one in case it caved under my weight. Normally, in these situations, I¡¯d tell myself not to be scared, that silly things like ghosts and vampires didn¡¯t exist but, for some reason, I just couldn¡¯t take my word for it. I reached the base and stood for a moment in the dusty darkness, considering turning back and at least getting a lantern. There was no light in that room, and the dawn was still a good hour or so away. But, if I went back upstairs and David caught me sneaking around, I¡¯d have to either justify my mission or come up with some lie. And there had been enough lies between us lately. Enough that neither of my two options was all that appealing. So, I pushed the door open, cringing as the groaning hinges screeched their protest in an echo through the tunnel for all who may be waking in the manor to hear. ¡°Ara?¡± My quick steps halted immediately, and the figure sitting on the edge of Eve¡¯s bed resolved itself into a man, his elbows on his knees, holding something rag-like in his hands. ¡°Jase?¡± ¡°Hey, Ara.¡± He looked up from the floor between his feet, offering a weak smile. ¡°Hey, what are you doing in here?¡± I walked over, letting the dense relief swim through my limbs and relax them. ¡°I like to come here to think.¡± ¡°Why here?¡± I motioned around the dusty space¡ªits ancient fabrics and trinkets making it look like a haunted house. ¡°It¡¯s so eerie.¡± ¡°Same reason you came down here, I guess.¡± I frowned at him. ¡°It¡¯s a secret. No one in the world can find you here unless they know about this room.¡± ¡°So you wanted total privacy?¡± He slowly cast his gaze to the floor again. ¡°Something like that.¡± ¡°Then, I guess that means you heard about David''s little suicide mission?¡± I swung around the bedpost and came to rest on the mattress beside Jase, stirring up a dust cloud as I landed. ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°What do you think? I mean¡ª¡± I cleared my throat. ¡°How do you feel about it?¡± He stood, dumping the thing he was holding on the chair as he passed it. ¡°Like cutting a hole in my gut to drain out all the guilt, all the pain, all the fear.¡± ¡°Jase?¡± I stood too. ¡°I''m so sorry.¡± He nodded to himself. ¡°Growing up, we . . . we¡¯d fight. We¡¯d play pranks on each other and, sometimes, we¡¯d do things brothers really shouldn''t do¡ªnasty things. But I always loved him, Ara. I''ve always known he¡¯d be there after to make up with or punch in the arm every day for a year until we got over whatever little feud it was we had at the time. And I was okay with that¡ªit was how we were. But. . .¡± He sat down in the chair on top of what he¡¯d just thrown there. ¡°I can''t even imagine him not being here. I can''t comprehend the idea that my brother will be gone . . . for forever.¡± Page 19 I wandered over and squatted before him, resting my hand gently over his. ¡°I won''t let this happen, Jase. I swear. I will find some way to stop him.¡±Advertisement ¡°How, Ara?¡± He stood, brushing past me. ¡°You know what he¡¯s like. I saw the argument you had.¡± ¡°You saw that?¡± I spun on the balls of my toes to watch him. He tapped his temple. ¡°Oh.¡± I got to my feet slowly. ¡°It¡¯s over,¡± he said, defeated. ¡°I tried. I¡¯ve tried so many things to¡ª¡± He stopped on a break in his voice. ¡°But nothing worked. I''m sorry. He¡¯s going to die.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t accept that, Jase.¡± ¡°It¡¯s too bad,¡± he said kindly. ¡°He won¡¯t wait for you to accept it, Ara. It is what it is.¡± ¡°Why won''t he help me help him?¡± I said, breaking to tears on the last word. ¡°I thought by coming to him, by getting it all out in the open, maybe we could change things, maybe we could work together¡ªdo something.¡± ¡°I know. And it was the right thing to do, but. . .¡± ¡°But, it didn''t work. He doesn''t care. It¡¯s like he wants to die.¡± ¡°Or maybe he¡¯s just already accepted it.¡± ¡°Hmpf. Easy for some,¡± I muttered, wiping my nose. ¡°No. It¡¯s not. Don¡¯t you see, Ara? It¡¯s not that he doesn''t care or that he wants to die, but that it¡¯s taken him so long to accept his fate that he¡¯s worried it¡¯s all gonna come undone with one word of hope, and then he¡¯s going to lose all that again when whatever plan you had fails.¡± I swiped a tear from the very tip of my nose. ¡°I get that. I do. I really understand what he''s gone through to cope with what he has to do, but I don''t care. I just. . .¡± ¡°I know.¡± ¡°You know what?¡± ¡°I know what will happen to you when he¡¯s gone?¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°Ask yourself this,¡± Jase said, stopping in front of me. ¡°What does it mean to you? What will your life be when he¡¯s no longer in it?¡± ¡°Nothing. Empty,¡± I answered quickly. ¡°No. Think harder. Think about that first day, when you wake up and there''s a shift in the paradigm. When you look out the window and suddenly that sense that he''s out there, that you''ll see him next week or that you''ll argue with him about something he said, will be gone. Like staring at a blank canvas.¡± He rolled his shoulders back slowly, watching the realisation form in front of him. ¡°There¡¯ll never be any way to paint over that. There will never be any way to fill that hole, Ara, and I love you, you know that, but even I can''t fill that hole for you. I know. . .¡± He sighed, dropping his hands to his knees for a second before standing tall again. ¡°I know you¡¯ve messed up from time to time when it comes to him and the way you love him. But you do love him, and that¡¯s what counts in the end, Ara, because after a hundred years with one person, that''s the only thing that keeps you together. God knows.¡± He rubbed his brow. ¡°I tried. I . . . but we failed, and it breaks my heart so immensely deep that you''ll have to suffer that¡ªthat you''ll have to feel that way for even a second. I would do anything. . .¡± His fists tightened. ¡°Anything to keep you from that, because your life won''t just be empty without him, Ara, it¡¯ll be like living without air.¡± I stepped closer, my eyes wide. ¡°Jase?¡± ¡°He know this, too, Ara. He knows all that his death will do to you, and he is still going to go¡ªstill going to let you suffer that, because his reasons for dying far outweigh anything else he might care about.¡± ¡°What reasons?¡± ¡°That¡¯s just it.¡± He offered a gentle smile; just one corner of his lip turning up, gifting me with the presence of his dimple. ¡°I don¡¯t even know.¡± ¡°Ara?¡± I spun around quickly. ¡°David.¡± ¡°What are you doing in here?¡± He glared at Jason as he walked over and placed his arm around me possessively. ¡°I was already in here when she came in,¡± Jase said flatly. ¡°Fine.¡± David looked from him to me, then back again. ¡°Then tell me what¡¯s going on.¡± ¡°We were just discussing your recent decision,¡± I said. ¡°Ara?¡± He sighed, stepping away. ¡°Get back to bed. We¡¯re not having this discussion again.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t do that to her.¡± Jason moved in, coming up fast in front of David. ¡°She has the right to fight for you. There has to be another way.¡± David just smiled. ¡°Would I be going to my death if there were?¡± ¡°Look, I understand that, but¡ª¡± Jase¡¯s words stopped, his eyes going smaller. ¡°Where did you get that information?¡± ¡°What information?¡± I asked, stepping into the conversation. David glanced back at me once, his shoulders sinking. ¡°Don''t you get it, brother? This has to end with her.¡± ¡°David, what do you mean?¡± I curled my white fingertips over his forearm. ¡°Please don¡¯t leave me in the dark anymore, David. I¡¯m begging you.¡± He looked at Jason one more time, who nodded, almost as if agreeing with something, then softly spoke my name¡ªall the fight, the strain, the depth leaving his voice in defeat. ¡°What you know of the prophecy so far is wrong.¡± ¡°What . . . what parts?¡± ¡°All of it. It¡¯s backward, misinterpreted.¡± He started pacing. ¡°This child, this Blood of Knight and Lilithian, that¡¯s not you. Nothing has been foretold. Only promised.¡± ¡°Promised?¡± ¡°What those pages are is¡ª¡± David stopped and looked away. ¡°They¡¯re not a prophecy, Ara. They¡¯re a contract.¡± My eyes darted to Jason. ¡°So Jason was right.¡± David frowned at him. ¡°You told her it was a contract?¡± ¡°I did.¡± ¡°How did you know?¡± ¡°Arthur didn¡¯t tell me,¡± Jason said, answering an unspoken question. ¡°I only had to read it to see the truth.¡± ¡°And still,¡± David said, turning away to rub his head. ¡°It seems even you missed the proverbial left hand while you were watching the right.¡± ¡°So it would seem.¡± Jason nodded once then looked at me. ¡°Ara, you¡¯ve not only been mislead, pretty girl. You¡¯ve been lied to.¡± ¡°What do you mean? By who?¡± I asked Jase, but it really was aimed more at David, because I already knew the answer¡ªcould feel the tension coming off David¡¯s soul in waves. ¡°Me,¡± David said. ¡°And Morgaine,¡± Jason added. ¡°What?¡± I nearly rocketed forward to grab David and shake him. ¡°We deliberately mislead you, my love¡ªmisled everyone.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°It began as bended truth, many centuries ago,¡± he said. ¡°Morgaine needed others to back her against a king she wanted overthrown. But without hope of new queen rising, the Lilithians wouldn¡¯t stand. So, she tore the scrolls, burnt them, marred them in order to make the words appear as if they were from the Book of Carmen¡ª¡± ¡°What¡¯s the Book of Carmen?¡± I asked. ¡°A collection of Vampirie¡¯s predictions written down throughout the centuries,¡± Jase informed. ¡°Morgaine made people believe there was a prophecy,¡± David continued. ¡°And she created an army in the name of the new queen, not knowing whether one would ever return.¡± ¡°Why would she go to such lengths? What the hell is it we¡¯re fighting against?¡± ¡°Drake,¡± both boys said simply. ¡°He is a master of the Dark Arts, Ara. He deals with Black Magic, and as if that weren¡¯t something to fear enough, those dealings with the devil have turned his soul into something as twisted and black as death itself,¡± David said. ¡°He has done unspeakable things, and even in a society of killers, there is a line we all draw. Morgaine was tired of seeing her people¡ªyour people suffer. She had to stop him, even if it took her centuries to do it.¡± ¡°So, she made the contract look like a prophecy?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Wouldn¡¯t they have supported her if it was a contract? I mean, doesn¡¯t it promise the restoration of things taken?¡± ¡°No. It promises to restore one thing.¡± ¡°What one thing?¡± ¡°We don¡¯t actually know.¡± David sighed the words out. ¡°No one does. It was never mentioned in the contract.¡± ¡°All we do know for sure, Ara,¡± Jason said, ¡°is that there¡¯s no document foretelling the birth of a child¡ªor the future possibility to restore mortality to vampires.¡± I let that sink in for a second. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Ara,¡± David said softly. ¡°We can¡¯t free the Immortal Damned.¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± I cupped my hand over his as it landed on my shoulder. ¡°I¡¯m okay, David. Jase already told me that might be the case.¡± David glared at Jason. ¡°You knew this as well?¡± Jason nodded. ¡°Arthur told me what happened that day.¡± ¡°What day?¡± I studied both boys, completely confused. David stepped back, closing his eyes. ¡°We never intended to make up that part of the prophecy, Ara. Morgaine told our people of a coming queen¡ªone who would bear a child that could kill Drake. But, when you were rescued from Elysium, we. . .¡± ¡°They all thought you just wanted to die,¡± Jason finished for him, looking back at me. ¡°We didn¡¯t realise it was merely because you believed I was dead. And in a moment of desperation, Morgaine told you that lie¡ªtold you there was a way to save the Damned.¡± David hung his head in shame. ¡°And neither herself, nor I, have had the courage to correct it since that day.¡± ¡°David?¡± I whispered his name, my heart breaking a little, not for the truth, though, but for the fact that he not only went to so much trouble to lie to me, but keep it up too. I felt stupid and used. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Ara.¡± ¡°This. . .¡± I said through my teeth. ¡°This is why you wouldn¡¯t approve Jason¡¯s lab?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± He eyed Jason suspiciously. ¡°And now I¡¯m left wondering why my brother, who also clearly knew more than he let on, was sanctioning for a lab to research ways to do something he knows can¡¯t be done.¡± ¡°It wasn¡¯t just for the immortality cure, David. You know that,¡± Jase said sharply. ¡°I clearly outlined my concerns for her safety and the¡ª¡± ¡°Mike has it under control,¡± David yelled. ¡°Has what under control?¡± I stepped between the two of them. Page 20 David composed himself. ¡°Your blue light.¡± I looked down at my hands.Advertisement ¡°That is not control,¡± Jason said, presenting me. ¡°I¡¯ve warned you, David. He could be hurting her by pushing her. And she¡¯s tired of being in pain, brother¡ª¡± ¡°She is my problem, Jason. Not yours. You¡ª¡± ¡°It¡¯s not just her pain, though. I told you. I showed you all the facts, David. I strongly believe that, beneath all these lies, we may have actually found a way to restore mortal life.¡± David let a breath out through his nose like an angry bull. ¡°Brother, there is no¡ª¡± ¡°So what does the contract mean?¡± I cut in before they started bickering again. ¡°What does it actually agree on?¡± David¡¯s shoulders rolled back to their correct position. ¡°Like you said, Ara. It was a simple promise Drake made to Lilith to give something back in exchange for a child.¡± ¡°Not just a child,¡± Jason said, his throat tight, his teeth closed. ¡°No,¡± David added, his fists falling loose. ¡°Her child, one not yet born, but sworn to be conceived under certain conditions.¡± ¡°Certain conditions?¡± I frowned. ¡°Tell her, or I will.¡± Jason stared David down¡ªboth of them meeting eye to eye, like a man staring into a mirror. ¡°Fine,¡± he added, peeling his eyes away from his brother. ¡°Ara, your blood is cursed.¡± ¡°Cursed?¡± I repeated, feeling like I had the repeat-every-last-line-these-guys-say disease. ¡°Yes,¡± Jason said. ¡°To bear only females until the debt is repaid¡ªa debt Lilith bequeathed your bloodline¡ªpassed down from mother to daughter over the centuries, until falling, finally, on you.¡± ¡°Which further cements our conclusions that your mom Eleanor wasn¡¯t your biological mother, Ara,¡± David added. ¡°Since she gave birth to a boy.¡± ¡°Okay, so my dad isn¡¯t my dad. My mom wasn¡¯t my mom. And I can only have girls until I¡¯ve given Drake my firstborn.¡± David shook his head. ¡°No. Until your firstborn is conceived with a nobleman¡¯s son.¡± ¡°A nobleman?¡± I grimaced. ¡°What, like a¡ª¡± ¡°Knight.¡± Jase winked at me. ¡°As in. . .¡± I pictured a man riding a horse in a metal suit with a jousting stick. ¡°Like a. . .¡± ¡°Men were not knighted only for their ability to wield a sword, Ara,¡± David said. ¡°They were knighted for the nobility they either had in their blood or in their hearts.¡± ¡°So, I have to a baby with someone who¡¯s noble.¡± ¡°Not just any noble,¡± Jason said, casting his gaze slowly across the dusty room to his brother. ¡°One specific noble.¡± ¡°Who?¡± David sniffed once, standing taller. ¡°Me.¡± I went to speak, tell him I already knew that, but Jase cut in. ¡°You weren¡¯t meant to exist, Ara,¡± he said. ¡°Lilith was supposed to be the one who bore a child with David.¡± ¡°Whoa.¡± I suddenly needed to sit down, but stayed standing, unable to move. Lilith . . . and David? No way. No freakin¡¯ way. ¡°Then . . . I wasn¡¯t foretold or promised? You were, David.¡± ¡°More like designed,¡± he said. ¡°What do you mean by that?¡± ¡°Drake needed blood of the purest forms to create this child. Now, we don¡¯t know why that was a requirement,¡± David reported, as if he were a lawyer in a court, presenting facts to a jury. ¡°But he cast a spell on my father¡¯s bloodline many centuries ago¡ªone that would see only sons born to the blood of Knight until, at last, the cleansing was complete and two sons would be born to one mother.¡± ¡°One with the purest of heart,¡± Jason said and looked at David. ¡°And the other. . .¡± ¡°Centuries of all the bad in one little boy.¡± Those words swallowed my thoughts for a minute, reminding me of what David¡¯s own father believed about Jason. ¡°Jason¡¯s the impure one?¡± ¡°So it would seem.¡± Jason looked at his feet. ¡°And you¡¯re¡ª¡± I walked over and touched his shoulder, ignoring David¡¯s quick intake of breath. ¡°You¡¯re learning this for the first time?¡± ¡°I was always told as such. I just never knew it would turn out to be true.¡± ¡°How did your father know?¡± I looked at David. ¡°We¡¯re not sure. But he misinterpreted the meaning, taking it to mean Jason would be evil.¡± I smiled across at Jason. He was far from evil. ¡°So, you were originally intended to be with Lilith then, David?¡± He nodded once. ¡°We¡¯re not sure what went wrong. All we do know is that you carry her blood and her curse. You could bear child after child, Ara, but the curse will not break until this child is born of yours and my blood.¡± And, finally, the information in the scrolls made sense. For once. ¡°How do you know this stuff?¡± David¡¯s dimple showed for a second. ¡°What do you think I¡¯ve been doing all these months?¡± ¡°Right.¡± I nodded, rubbing my face. ¡°Okay. Info overload.¡± Jason laughed once, and the sound brought me back a little, made me realise we were all still here, not lost somewhere in the past. ¡°So he wants our baby,¡± I said simply. ¡°Let¡¯s just not have one.¡± ¡°We can¡¯t do that, either.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because of the curse.¡± ¡°The blood curse?¡± ¡°Yes. If we do not conceive before I die, and you were to go on to love another¡ª¡± David cleared his throat, his eyes clearly avoiding Jason. ¡°Any child you bear with that man will carry the burden that is yours, that was your mothers before you and so on and so on¡ªthe curse repeating itself over and over, passed down to the firstborn, until this child, conceived of my blood, exists.¡± ¡°So, the curse will break on conception?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Then, that¡¯s what Drake agreed to restore or . . . give back?¡± ¡°Perhaps, but it¡¯s not relevant or even important, Ara.¡± ¡°Then what is?¡± ¡°Killing Drake.¡± He stepped closer. ¡°Don¡¯t you see? We can¡¯t run from this. I must father our child to save her sitting where you sit now, carrying a curse that is not hers. And from the second she is a living being inside your body, her life will be in danger.¡± ¡°Why in danger? You said you don¡¯t know what Drake plans to do with her.¡± ¡°She¡¯s been promised to him, that¡¯s all we need to know,¡± Jason said. ¡°I¡¯ve lived a hundred years under his roof, Ara, and he is not¡ª¡± David held his finger up, angling his head away, ¡°¡ªgetting my daughter.¡± ¡°So, then . . . he needs to die?¡± I said, though I couldn¡¯t feel the words come from my lips. ¡°Yes, because if I choose to live¡ªto run and not kill Drake, then we will look over our shoulders every day, my love, wondering if today is the day our baby girl doesn¡¯t come home from school, if today is the day he finds her.¡± David walked over and cupped both my shoulders gently, leaning down to look right into my eyes. ¡°I was born purely to end this curse, Ara. There is no way around this.¡± I wanted to scream and yell¡ªwanted to find the corpse of Lilith and burn it or stab it repeatedly for undoing everything I ever thought I had. David was never mine. He probably only fell in love with me because he and Lilith were meant for each other. ¡°How long have you known about this?¡± I said so quietly that Jase took a step forward, his hand twitching as if he planned to touch me. David took a second, but finally answered with, ¡°Since before you left for Loslilian.¡± I sat down on the armchair, landing on the doll Jase had thrown there earlier. Neither of the boys said a word for a while. Jase watched me carefully, probably reading my thoughts, while David stood staring at the ground. ¡°I don¡¯t care about this blood curse, David. Not when there is still a way to save you,¡± I said softly, not really wanting a challenge, but not ready to give up the fight either. ¡°Having a child with another man and sending him to kill Drake is not the answer, either, Ara,¡± David said calmly, even though it was through his teeth. ¡°I checked. I talked with Walt, with Arthur, and they have varying opinions, but one fact remains: the scrolls that describe our laws clearly state that the child must be born for a jure uxorious to take his throne.¡± ¡°What?¡± Both Jase and I said. I stood up. ¡°I thought it could be as long as I was pregnant.¡± ¡°When it comes to the law, Ara, ask me. Trust me. I''m the one who knows every in and out and every loophole. The child must be born,¡± David said. ¡°And before our new king even had a chance to kill Drake, he would swoop in, steal you and your unborn child, and probably kill it in the womb to stop the cycle repeating. I can''t let that happen.¡± I sat down again. ¡°Why didn''t you just tell me all this when we argued earlier?¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± He looked at his brother. ¡°I don''t know.¡± ¡°Say it,¡± Jase said, but his voice broke beneath a breathy laugh. ¡°What, you think she¡¯s gonna laugh at you?¡± ¡°I. . .¡± David studied his feet. ¡°I guess I just forget sometimes that you can be reasoned with, Ara. That you¡ª¡± He stopped and came to kneel in front of me, gently taking my fingertips in his. ¡°That you''re my best friend, and I can tell you anything.¡± I smiled at him. ¡°You reminded me of that by coming to me earlier, being straight with me, and I really appreciated that. I know I came across as angry and unreasonable, but it¡¯s . . . if there was anything else we could do, I would already be doing it. Do you really think I want to leave you?¡± I shrugged. ¡°Well, I don''t, silly girl. I have everything I ever wanted and so many things I would never have imagined to want. But I have to give up this life¡ª¡± He reached up and cupped my cheek. ¡°Have to leave you alone, because this burden was born to me, not to you, my love. I don''t want to be looking over my shoulder for the rest of forever, and I don''t want that for you.¡± I nodded, laying my hand over his. ¡°Please, Ara. Just tell me you understand. I need you to understand.¡± I nodded again. I understood perfectly, which was exactly why I couldn¡¯t bring myself to say it. ¡°When . . . when do you plan to go?¡± ¡°That depends.¡± ¡°On what?¡± ¡°You.¡± ¡°Why me?¡± ¡°If you. . .¡± His pupils grew wider looking into mine. ¡°Knowing this now, do you still want to have a child with me?¡± I tried not to grin like a little girl, but I couldn¡¯t help it. ¡°Yes. More than ever.¡± Page 21 ¡°Then I¡¯ll leave for Romania in a month, after we¡¯ve conceived.¡± He kissed my nose and stood up.Advertisement ¡°Romania?¡± I gasped. ¡°How did you¡ªI mean, I thought he was in Paris,¡± I corrected, playing dumb, trying not to think about the conversation Arthur and I had a few weeks ago, when he confessed to forging a letter reporting Drake¡¯s whereabouts. ¡°It was a lie,¡± David said. ¡°My spies have located him in Romania.¡± I sat silently, cursing David and his competence. ¡°Jason?¡± He turned to his brother, whose obvious distress had not gone unnoticed. ¡°What is it?¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± Jason paused, his face going almost blue with horror. He took a few slow steps backward, his butt meeting the shelf, making it wobble unsteadily on the uneven wood floors. ¡°I¡¯ve made a really big mistake.¡± ¡°What mistake?¡± David appeared in front of him. ¡°Speak to me, brother?¡± ¡°I have to. . .¡± Jason looked at me once before slowly turning his gaze back to David. ¡°There''s something you need to know.¡± David cupped his hand along the side of Jason¡¯s neck, his thumb on his face like some Mafia boss. ¡°You can tell me anything, brother, you know that.¡± ¡°I just wanted to save you¡ªto save her from what she¡¯d do to save you.¡± ¡°What do you mean? Hold that thought.¡± David halted the conversation with his index finger and grabbed his phone from his back pocket. ¡°Yo.¡± I frowned at Jason, but he averted his eyes quickly. ¡°Okay. I¡¯ll be there in a sec.¡± David hung up and stowed the phone again, untucking his shirttail where the device dragged it into his pocket a little. ¡°Ara, time for bed.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Mike¡¯s got an issue with one of the Damned. I gotta run.¡± ¡°So?¡± ¡°So, I¡¯m not leaving you two in the same room¡ªalone.¡± I rolled my eyes at him. ¡°Grow up, David. What d¡¯you think I¡¯m gonna do? Make a baby with him?¡± ¡°That¡¯s not funny, Ara.¡± I shrugged, trying not to laugh at the look on his face. He pointed at Jason. ¡°It¡¯s on your shoulders, brother.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not gonna touch her.¡± ¡°See that you don¡¯t.¡± ¡°David?¡± I stood, but he disappeared. ¡°Argh! He has got to stop doing that.¡± ¡°Ara? I¡¯m so sorry.¡± A frown moved in across my face, my gaze slowly landing on Jason. ¡°Why are you sorry?¡± ¡°I. . .¡± He exhaled, folding over as if he was puffed out. ¡°I didn''t know that¡ªabout the law.¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°I . . . if I¡¯d known. I would never have. . .¡± ¡°Jase, you''re scaring me.¡± I took a few steps closer and bent down to his level, gently tilting his chin upward. ¡°What¡¯s wrong?¡± He opened his mouth, his eyes darting over every inch of my face, but no words came. ¡°Jase, please.¡± ¡°I¡¯ve failed you so many times, in so many ways, Ara.¡± ¡°What are you talking about?¡± ¡°I just . . . I just need you to know that I''m sorry¡ªfor everything.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I half laughed, stroking his stubbly cheek over and over again. ¡°It¡¯s okay, Jase. Really. Everything¡¯s okay.¡± He sobered with a shaky breath. ¡°It is. As long as he never asks me what I was about to say.¡± My frown deepened. ¡°What were you about to say?¡± ¡°Something that would¡¯ve ruined your last few months together.¡± He stood straight again. ¡°It was stupid. I wasn¡¯t thinking.¡± ¡°What would ruin it?¡± ¡°Nothing. Just . . . nothing.¡± ¡°Have you. . .? Did you. . .?¡± ¡°It¡¯s nothing, Ara.¡± He reached across and rubbed my arm reassuringly. ¡°I¡ªit was just bringing up the past.¡± ¡°Yeah, don''t do that.¡± I grinned. ¡°He hates even thinking about it.¡± ¡°I know. I¡¯ll uh. . .¡± He backed away a few steps. ¡°I¡¯ll see ya later, sweet girl, okay?¡± ¡°O¡ª¡± I started, but when I looked up to see his smiling eyes, he was gone. ¡°What is it with these Knight boys and farewells?¡± I said, imagining Eve down here in the eerie old room beside me. But no one answered. The morning had risen outside as we¡¯d all talked, and there was at least enough light in here now to find a small golden apple if one were searching for it. So, I put my aches and problems away inside my chest for a minute and dusted my hands off on my nightdress, even though they weren''t dirty, then folded myself in half to look under the bed. That apple I dreamed about was in here somewhere. I could have sworn I¡¯d put it on the dresser last time, but it wasn¡¯t there when I stole a glance behind Jason just now. ¡°Eve?¡± I said softly, not sure if she was here or if she was even real. ¡°Can you help me find it?¡± A high chime rang through the air then, sharp, but melodious, drowned out slightly by the clicking of gears. I walked slowly over to the music box on the dresser and, there, sitting among a few small trinkets, was the golden apple Eve was given before she died. ¡°Thank you, Eve,¡± I whispered, picking it up. ¡°I promise you I¡¯ll figure this out.¡± The apple glimmered in what little dawn light crept in between the boarded windows. It was heavy for something so small, reminding me a little of a fairy tale I read when I was young¡ªabout a golden ball and a frog. I turned it several times in my hands, poking the smooth, cold surface, but there was no hole, no button, no secret door. It was completely solid. And I had no idea what that meant. Maybe the keyhole I saw in my dream was a mistake or maybe even a metaphor, as in, maybe, the apple was the key to something, or the door to something. ¡°Okay, you know that promise I just made?¡± I said suggestively, then curled my fingers around the golden apple, hiding it away as I headed for the stairs again. When the secret door closed behind me this morning as the dawn settled toward day, I¡¯d stood in my empty room for longer than the clock ticking on the wall cared to admit. But David didn¡¯t come back up¡ªdidn¡¯t come to talk to me or make everything okay. He was gone, clearly off somewhere playing his role as king. I left my room behind and, as I¡¯d walked down the corridor to find him, my sweeping gaze landed on the two figures in the front yard. A caravan of delivery trucks streamed in one by one, and David and Arthur stepped up to sign for packages that were, judging by the volume of plants and boxes of beakers they were checking, the stock for Arthur¡¯s new Herbalist Lab and greenhouse. Clearly, David wasn¡¯t coming up to talk to me anytime soon. He¡¯d given me all he was required to give: the facts. He¡¯d brush it off and keep going now, duty-bound to operate in a ¡®business as usual¡¯ manner. The way he always did. Come what may. He looked up from time to time as I paced the floors in front of the windows, and I pretended not to notice him trying to catch my gaze¡ªwalking with my head down, my fingers tightly clasped around the golden apple. He did care how I felt, for what it was worth. I knew it mattered to him how much this hurt me, but I could map the conversation out in my head that we¡¯d have even if he did actually come up here to comfort me. Nothing I did or argued could change what had to be done. I had two options: accept his death quietly and with grace, or demonstrate my inner child by kicking and screaming about it until David was gone. Down in the yard, a large truck arrived, and a small group of men ran eagerly toward it, tapping the edges before it even stopped. They were all smiling and laughing, talking with enough animation that I could almost read their lips. Arthur seemed more excited than the others, though. David had blessed him with the lab and greenhouse he¡¯d applied for over the last hundred years passed, then gone and denied his own brother the same. I felt hurt for Jason. He deserved better than what he put up with here, and the truth about his brother¡¯s future had hit him harder than even I expected. It just seemed like only Jason and I really understood what it meant¡ªreally knew what it would be like to lose David. Maybe Arthur understood, too, but he seemed to accept that this was David¡¯s duty. As if he¡¯d accepted it long ago, like David had. The fact was, David would go away in a month or so, pack the dagger into his bag and. . . I took a quick breath, dropping the apple to the ground by my feet with a solid thud. The dagger. Arthur gave him the duplicate. The fake. I ran to the window and pressed my hands and nose against it, watching Arthur in the front yard by the pond. Maybe he wasn¡¯t all that supportive of David¡¯s plan after all. Maybe he had his own in effect right now. But if David journeyed to Romania with the fake dagger and jammed it through Drake¡¯s heart, only one of them would die. And it wouldn¡¯t be Drake. ¡°Ara?¡± David¡¯s firm fingers wrapped my arm, gently tugging me away from the window. But when I turned around to look into his eyes, a pair of warm, caramel one¡¯s stared back. ¡°Falcon.¡± ¡°You need some rest, My Queen,¡± he said, and a flicker of something other than business flashed in his eyes for a moment. ¡°You¡¯ve been out here since dawn.¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± I glanced over my shoulder out the window. ¡°I can¡¯t sleep.¡± ¡°I know.¡± He dropped my arm, stepping back into professional mode. ¡°But you at least need to lie down.¡± ¡°Why? So I can wait for my husband to die from a more comfortable position for you?¡± I said spitefully. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, does my pacing offend you somehow?¡± He bent down and picked up my golden apple, studying it for a second before planting it firmly in my hand. ¡°Don¡¯t do this, Ara.¡± ¡°What?¡± I swiped a hand across my nose. ¡°Don¡¯t be a spoilt brat. You¡¯ve made so much progress lately. This isn¡¯t you. You¡¯re hurt, I get that, but there¡¯s no sense in behaving like a child to express it. Which is exactly what you¡¯re doing.¡± My shoulders dropped. I looked quickly down both ends of the hall and let out a long breath. ¡°I know. I¡¯m sorry, I just¡ª¡± ¡°Come on.¡± He grasped my upper arm and steered me toward my room. ¡°Rest for a bit. The grief will still be there when you wake up.¡± My chest caved a few times, turning the ache inside to an outward snivel. I wanted so badly just to fall into Falcon¡¯s arms for a hug¡ªjust a pair of arms, anyone¡¯s arms, to ease the caged, heavy feeling in my heart. But he wouldn¡¯t have any of that. I knew that. So, I sucked up the grief and opened my door, quietly thanking Falcon before closing it and flopping down onto my bed¡ªan ¡°acceptable¡± place to grieve. Page 22 ¡°You have to give David the real dagger!¡± I slammed Arthur¡¯s bedroom door behind me.Advertisement The gentle hum of his violin stopped in an abrupt and high-pitched screech as he looked up in shock. ¡°And why on God¡¯s good earth would I ever do that?¡± ¡°Because he¡¯s going to kill Drake.¡± I held strong, reshuffling my feet as if standing tall on a rocky boat. ¡°If he has the wrong dagger, Drake will kill him.¡± Arthur rested his violin in its stand by the fireplace and stood motionless for a moment, exhaling through his nose. ¡°Arthur, he knows Drake¡¯s in Romania.¡± ¡°I know.¡± He appeared by my side, and guided me by the wrist to the long oak table in the middle of the room. ¡°Take a seat, my dear.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t want to sit,¡± I said, sitting. ¡°I want you to promise me you¡¯ll give him the real dagger.¡± All Arthur offered in response as he sat down across from me, though, was a long sigh into his fist; his thoughts lost a million miles away. ¡°What has he told you?¡± ¡°He told me his father knew about this blood curse and this connection to Lilith, which means you had to have known, Arthur, how can you not? You¡ª¡± ¡°Okay, I¡¯m going to have to stop you there, Amara.¡± He held his hand up. ¡°I knew about the Cursed Blood of Knight, yes, and I argued with David for three hours about telling you the truth. He overruled me, princess, and you¡¯re his wife. I¡¯ve no place going against his wishes.¡± ¡°But I¡¯m your friend,¡± I said in a shaky voice. ¡°Doesn¡¯t that count?¡± ¡°Yes. And that is precisely why I sat in that day Jason was helping you read the scrolls. I hoped a hint of the truth would be enough to set your mind working, that maybe you would come to your own conclusions after that.¡± ¡°But all it did was shatter my hopes of freeing the Damned, Arthur.¡± ¡°I know. And I learned an important lesson that day¡ªto trust David when he says he knows what¡¯s best for you.¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°He warned me that you were holding on to the hope that you could save the children to survive. I was wrong to let Jason tell you as much as he did, but I didn¡¯t realise that until it was too late.¡± I twiddled my thumbs, watching one go around the other for a second. ¡°You knew Lilith when she was alive, right?¡± ¡°I did.¡± ¡°Then, surely you must know more about this contract and the promised child than you¡¯re letting on.¡± ¡°I know some things, but not from living in that time. I was not around for the death of Lilith, or the events that led to it. But with decades of research, I¡¯ve collected some facts about it and made my own conclusions.¡± ¡°Then . . . do you know what Drake wants with my child?¡± ¡°No. But I have a theory.¡± ¡°I¡¯m listening,¡± I said, my voice peaking with interest. ¡°Lilith killed Anandene, and eventually promised her own child to Drake as a means to end the suffering he caused in return. But why does he want her child as repayment for what she did to his wife?¡± I shrugged. ¡°Seems like an odd exchange.¡± ¡°Right. Unless he planned to use the powerful blood of his immortal sister to restore the untethered soul of his beloved.¡± My face went numb. ¡°Restore?¡± ¡°I told you once that immortal souls are the one¡¯s that reincarnate?¡± ¡°Yes, unless the connection was severed.¡± ¡°Right. Well, Anandene¡¯s body was killed, not necessarily her soul.¡± ¡°So . . .how . . . I mean¡ª¡± I thought about all that. ¡°He wants to . . . what? Reincarnate Anandene?¡± ¡°Or insert her soul into your newborn child.¡± My mouth dropped. ¡°It would explain the queer requirements of conception,¡± he added. ¡°The fact that it had to be born from the purest blood of a nobleman¡¯s son. And it explains why Drake has kept Safia, a known Vampirian enemy, around all these years.¡± ¡°What would a witch have to do with a baby and a soul insertion?¡± ¡°He needs her to complete the ritual.¡± ¡°Ritual?¡± That sounded so much scarier than using the words soul insertion, conjuring up images of lightning and stone tables and long cloaks. ¡°Is . . . is this kind of thing possible?¡± Arthur nodded. ¡°Drake performed this ritual once before. But it failed.¡± ¡°Well, who was it? What happened?¡± ¡°I know only a few details, but it has been whispered that Drake attempted it on his mother¡¯s soul.¡± ¡°So . . . what happened to her then?¡± ¡°I do not know, princess.¡± He folded his fingers together on the table. ¡°I do know that a certain kind of magic runs in his veins, in any born immortal¡¯s veins, but he would not have the power to perform such a spell. He needs a witch¡ªneeds Safia, and I fear that, once he¡¯s done with her, he plans to dispose of her.¡± ¡°What¡¯s wrong with that?¡± I said, then rolled my wrist out. ¡°I mean, aside from the obvious¡ªher being dead.¡± ¡°Safia will not go easily. She would be only too aware what Drake plans for her, and she will be taking steps to prevent this.¡± ¡°Like what?¡± Arthur sat back, resting his knuckles by his lips, studying me as if considering how much to disclose. ¡°She may be looking for an immortal vessel of her own, possibly the one Drake plans to take from you.¡± I touched my belly. ¡°So, she¡¯s going to insert herself into my baby?¡± Arthur nodded once, his eyes lost in thought. ¡°After all my research and contemplation, this is my latest conclusion.¡± He reached across the table for my hand; I placed it in his. ¡°Of course, I could be very, very wrong.¡± I squeezed his hand and sat back. ¡°It sounds pretty scary. But also very plausible. What did David say?¡± ¡°He said it was of no consequence¡ªsaid that Drake would be dead before it was a problem.¡± ¡°But even if we kill Drake, what about Safia?¡± Arthur laughed. ¡°If he¡¯s not around to kill her, she won¡¯t need a new body.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I nodded. ¡°So, if we kill Drake, does that void the contract?¡± ¡°Yes. If you kill him with the dagger.¡± ¡°Why? Why not just kill him with venom?¡± ¡°Because, my dear, think back. Try to remember what I told you.¡± He gave me a second to think about it. ¡°That the dagger severs the connection of the immortalised soul from this world,¡± he said. ¡°If you simply kill Drake, his soul will reincarnate, or could possibly be transferred into another immortal body later, and the contract will be reinstated.¡± ¡°So the contract is bound to his soul?¡± ¡°And to Lilith¡¯s.¡± I exhaled, my shoulders sinking. ¡°Falling on her descendants until it¡¯s fulfilled.¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Damn.¡± I rested my head in my palms. ¡°I was really hoping to find a way around using that dagger.¡± ¡°As was David, my dear. He and I have exhausted all these options.¡± ¡°Why didn¡¯t he tell me about the whole soul insertion ritual?¡± ¡°Because it is only a theory at this point, and David does act on a whim. I came up with this theory, but I¡ª¡± He laughed, jerking his head toward the fireplace and the stack of books beside it. ¡°I may have spent too long poring over fantasy.¡± I slowly looked back from the books. ¡°So, what do we do?¡± ¡°Like I said: focus on what we know, protect your unborn child and, rather than dig through the depths of Drake''s lies and plans, kill him.¡± ¡°And kill David in the process.¡± My sharp words travelled across the oak top of Arthur¡¯s table and hit him right in the heart, making his body shudder. ¡°I lost him once.¡± He looked down. ¡°And I swore I would not lose him again. But it seems we are left with little choice.¡± And that left only one thing to gain in David¡¯s Inventory of Death. ¡°So you¡¯ll give him the right dagger?¡± ¡°You have my word.¡± I nodded once and, feeling the rise of emotions I just wanted to control, placed both hands on the tabletop, stood slowly, and walked away. ¡°Amara?¡± I stopped, holding the door ajar. ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°I know,¡± I said, and as the door closed behind me, the tears I could hold no longer streamed down my face. I felt like a leaf in a pond, held down by a stick¡ªtoo tired to come back up, too alive to just sink down and give up. ¡°Ara.¡± Blade left his guard post and scooped me up in a warm embrace. ¡°Don¡¯t cry, little queen. Please, don¡¯t cry.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t lose him, Blade. I can¡¯t do this,¡± I sobbed into his shirt, my arms and hands shaking, so tight with grief my skin was red. ¡°I¡¯m not strong enough.¡± ¡°You are, don¡¯t you know?¡± He placed a hand over the side of my face, cupping my ear firmly. ¡°You¡¯re stronger than anyone gives you credit for.¡± ¡°But I don¡¯t want to be, Blade. Maybe if I wasn¡¯t¡ªmaybe if David knew how bad this would hurt me, how much it would kill me, he wouldn¡¯t go. He wouldn¡¯t¡ª¡± ¡°He has no choice.¡± ¡°I know.¡± I sunk down, tearing away from Blade¡¯s arms, and sat on the ground with my head in my hands. ¡°I know. But I have no control. None. And I hate it!¡± ¡°Ara?¡± David¡¯s smooth voice came past Blade¡¯s shoulder; he squatted down in front of me and, as his eyes met mine, I saw them flicker¡ªfelt him reach into my mind and see everything that just happened. He sat down beside me, the hall empty around us, free of guards, maids, friends, even Blade was gone. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Ara.¡± I hiccupped into my palms, rolling down to rest my head in David¡¯s lap. ¡°Nothing¡¯s ever going to make this okay, is it?¡± he said, his hand hovering above my hair as if he didn¡¯t want to break me down further by touching me. The only answer I could give was a shake of my head, keeping my face hidden. And we sat there alone, our backs against Arthur¡¯s door, watching the sun turn the walls orange then black as the night consumed us. Living things watched me pass¡ªthe all-seeing eyes of nature following me as I ran fast through the Enchanted Forest. My feet barely touched the floor, the speed of this immortal body taking me from the tree line outside the Garden of Lilith to the endless valley of trees beyond the Stone. I stopped on the face of a cliff, my palm against a trunk, folding over to catch my breath. The life of Nature ran violently through my veins, charging them with energy, while the exertion of my run simultaneously drained me. This body was an engine that could not be idle¡ªcould not run far enough away from the problems to fall down and care only about the physical pain. I couldn¡¯t walk through the fields or the trees without the Spirits of Nature making my heart ache, magnifying every emotion. Nothing would make this better. It was like dreaming while awake, and no matter how hard I pinched myself, I just couldn¡¯t get back to the world where none of this was happening. Page 23 I slid down the tree and let both legs dangle into the mouth of the valley. I knew this place was unnatural. I knew that if I flew a plane over this side of Loslilian Island, there¡¯d be no valley. But beyond the Stone of Truth, it seemed the world went on forever. It felt like a parallel world out here, a secret parallel world, because I was, from what I¡¯d gathered, the only one who¡¯d seen it¡ªalmost as if it were a gift only for those connected to the Stone.Advertisement The cuts and bruises on my bare feet healed as I sat, and the scrapes and gashes on my arms, hands, and cheeks tingled as they sealed themselves shut. My hair was frizzy, I could actually feel it, and I was sure my face was covered in dirt and blood because, when I wiped my tears away, my hands came back brown. ¡°I couldn¡¯t save him, Eve,¡± I said, feeling her spirit beside me. ¡°Don¡¯t cry,¡± she said. ¡°I¡¯m trying not to.¡± I wiped my face again and held my hands out, showing them to the forest. ¡°But I can¡¯t stop them from coming. How do I do that?¡± My heart jumped then, when her small, almost transparent hand landed in mine. ¡°The apple holds the key,¡± she said. I looked up from our locked fingertips and into her bright blue eyes; they were just like mine¡ªher face heart-shaped and so youthful it hurt to look at her, knowing she was dead¡ªalmost as if my soul quivered, bleeding inside. ¡°What does that mean, Eve?¡± She reached out slowly with her other hand and placed it flat across my belly. ¡°The apple holds the key.¡± ¡°Do you mean the child?¡± I said, cupping my hand over hers, but the tiny, cold touch of Eve was gone. I looked up to the place beside me where she sat a second ago, hearing the birds sing louder as the pink light across the trees turned bright yellow under the late morning sun. I knew I¡¯d sat here longer than I thought. I knew David would be looking for me, worried. I knew I¡¯d get a lecture from him and everyone else who treated me like a baby when I returned, but I didn¡¯t care. I hugged my knees to my chest and laid my cheek against them, thinking about the keyhole in the golden apple. ¡°Mike?¡± I called to the lone figure heading toward the lower west wing. He stopped in the darkened entranceway just below the stairs, watching me descend. ¡°What you doin¡¯ up so late, b-Ara?¡± ¡°Bara?¡± I laughed. ¡°Yeah, sorry.¡± He shook his head at himself. ¡°I gotta quit calling you baby.¡± I stepped off the stair and stood beside him, feeling suddenly so much smaller at the base of his bulk and height. ¡°David threaten to tear your arm off, huh?¡± Mike slowly folded one arm into his body, then the other. ¡°I dunno what¡¯s gotten into him lately. He¡¯s, to put it bluntly, he¡¯s scary.¡± ¡°No, he¡¯s the same David he¡¯s always been. We¡¯re just meeting the councillor.¡± ¡°Well, I¡¯m not sure I like King David.¡± I smiled, pushing his arms down from their fold. ¡°Give it time. He¡¯s been through a lot the last few months.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± He nodded. ¡°Fine. So, what did you want?¡± ¡°Oh, um.¡± I looked back up the stairs then at Mike again. ¡°David ran off the other day because you had a problem with the Damned. Just wondering¡ª¡± ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± He touched my shoulder. ¡°It was just Harrison. He wet his bed and wanted King David.¡± I covered my mouth slowly. ¡°Poor baby.¡± ¡°He¡¯s all right. He didn¡¯t want you to know, though.¡± ¡°Me? Why?¡± Mike¡¯s sideways smile warmed his whole face. ¡°Duh! You¡¯re a girl.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± I nodded, but my face still wrinkled with confusion. ¡°But¡ª¡± ¡°Never mind it, Ara.¡± He turned slightly and started walking away. ¡°It¡¯s all sorted now.¡± ¡°Okay,¡± I called to the back of his head. ¡°Well, thanks for the chat. Nice to see you. Hope we can do it again sometime in the next century.¡± I heard him laugh softly, throwing his hand up in a gentle wave goodbye. He must have been really busy. But I meant those words as more than just a joke. Since I¡¯d fallen off the lighthouse, he and I had spent less and less time chatting casually. He really had stepped into the role of employee and not so much friend. ¡°Miss you,¡± I added quietly and turned to walk back up the stairs. The whole manor was quiet, almost desolate. The Lilithian people finally at rest. They had their queen, the possibility of an heir¡ªone they still believed was foretold to transform vampires into humans¡ªand they would soon be rid of their immortal enemy, even though this meant losing their king, it was, to them, a worthy death. And a king could always be replaced. It was replacing the love of my life that I had a problem with. But, all that aside, those living in the manor were finally free. Morgaine had achieved nearly everything she set out to do centuries ago, yet her success made me feel hollow. My life so far had been lived around fulfilling this prophecy and freeing my people from the darkness of Drake¡¯s reign. Now that had been achieved, what was next? Day-to-day, right? Just ruling, eating and sleeping. Wake up, rinse and repeat. Over and over again for the rest of forever, alone. I turned the corner into the openness off the great library, and as I started up the stairs to the second floor, stopped and put my foot back down on the ground. The secret door to the Scroll Room was open, candlelight and laughter lilting up the stone stairs from within. ¡°Hello?¡± I called down the hole, coming to stop on the cusp, with my arms folded. ¡°Down here, sweetheart,¡± David said. ¡°Can I . . . is it okay if I come down?¡± ¡°Of course.¡± My head led the way toward David and the other voice, my fingertips trailing the bricks behind me. ¡°Shouldn¡¯t you be sleeping? You have a long trip tomorrow.¡± ¡°Vampires don¡¯t require as much sleep as your kind.¡± David placed his arm around my waist, pulling me close to his body, keeping his eyes on the notes in front of him. ¡°I found it!¡± Jason popped out from the door to our right and stopped dead when he saw me. ¡°Ara?¡± ¡°Jason.¡± I nodded politely. ¡°Hi. Um¡­what brings you down here?¡± He walked over and laid a scroll out in front of David, but his whole body was kind of stiff, tiny particles of tension clinging to every inch of his skin¡¯s surface. ¡°Woke up alone, went to get something to read, heard laughing, thought I¡¯d investigate.¡± He smiled at me, eyeing David carefully after to see if he noticed. ¡°Did David fill you in?¡± ¡°On what?¡± ¡°Look.¡± David pointed to a page of indecipherable scribble, made less visible in the flickering candlelight. ¡°We found out more about Morgana.¡± ¡°Really?¡± I turned the corner of the page, leaning over it as if I could actually read that language. ¡°And . . . what does it say?¡± ¡°It¡¯s a birth record. See?¡± His finger moved along the page, marking the words. ¡°Morgana LeFay. Born on the Sabbath day to Lilith of Loslilian and Lord Callon LeFay.¡± ¡°LeFay? But . . . I thought Christian, Lilith¡¯s first husband, was the father of Morgana.¡± ¡°Evidently, we were misinformed.¡± He stood back from leaning over the table. ¡°Ara? Do you know who Lord LeFay was?¡± ¡°No.¡± ¡°He was a very powerful witch,¡± his voice pitched in an interested tone on the last word. ¡°What¡¯s wrong with him being a witch?¡± ¡°Nothing, but it explains why Morgana never survived.¡± I groaned, rolling my eyes. ¡°That still doesn¡¯t make any sense to me.¡± ¡°Witches are mortals,¡± Jason explained, handing me a piece of paper. I unrolled it and the face of a stern-looking man stared back up at me in lines of grey and black, his long hair framing his face, falling around a frilly collar. ¡°According to Natural Law, those with the Power of the Earth cannot be immortal. Any who¡¯ve attempted spells or rituals to prolong life have met consistently with severe and often hellish consequences.¡± ¡°Right,¡± David cut in. ¡°So, what would happen to a child conceived of a mortal witch and an immortal vampire?¡± My eyebrows slid across my forehead, nearly meeting in the middle. ¡°So you think Morgana died before her body made the change?¡± ¡°I¡¯d bet my life on it,¡± David said, and Jason and I both looked up at him quickly. ¡°What?¡± He shrugged. ¡°Distasteful, David,¡± I said, laying the picture of Lord LeFay down. David, having realised he just made a pun about his own, now inevitable demise, laughed softly to himself and started rolling scrolls. I let myself digest this information, thinking about so many random other bits all at once, that when two of them crashed together, a conclusion sparked. ¡°What if she¡¯s not dead?¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± David said, tying a ribbon around an old, yellowing scroll. ¡°I mean, what if she lived? What if she couldn¡¯t be immortal but maybe aged at a slower rate than a human?¡± Jason and David exchanged glances. ¡°How old would she be if she were actually alive today?¡± I finished. David scratched his nose, bending down a little to lean his elbow on the chair back. ¡°Why, Ara? What¡¯s your point?¡± I held my smile for a minute. ¡°What if she¡¯s Drake¡¯s witch¡ªthe one you know as Safia?¡± ¡°What do you know of Safia?¡± Jason practically gasped. ¡°I¡­¡± I looked up at David, not sure if I was allowed to say anything. ¡°Arthur told me.¡± David turned at the shoulder to look at Jason. ¡°Ara, did Arthur say if he¡¯d ever actually seen Safia?¡± Jase asked in tone soft enough for a child. I shook my head. ¡°All he said was that she¡¯s very old and very powerful, and that he wanted to get his hands on her.¡± ¡°So she¡¯s real?¡± Jason looked at David. ¡°So it would seem,¡± David said, playing it like he and Arthur had never discussed such things. ¡°What¡¯s the big deal if she is real?¡± I asked. ¡°I¡¯ve only heard rumours of the Great Witch Safia Demente. But, none were good,¡± Jason said. ¡°Some say she conjured curses and plagues, killed babies¡ªthat she corrupted and influenced the church back in the days before Christ, and there have been rumours that she can change form and become something else.¡± ¡°Like a snake?¡± I asked, remembering my Walk of Faith. ¡°Any creature.¡± ¡°But . . . she¡¯s Drake¡¯s prisoner, right?¡± ¡°Or friend.¡± ¡°And¡­is that bad news for us?¡± ¡°It¡¯s bad news for any vampire¡ªeven Drake¡ªif he gets on the wrong side of her,¡± Jason said. Page 24 ¡°Her mere existence is bad for the entire human race, Ara,¡± David added. ¡°She¡¯s unnaturally old¡ªbeen around longer than us.¡± He motioned between himself and Jason.Advertisement ¡°And, rumour has it, as hideous as a millennium-old steak sandwich,¡± Jase said. ¡°Which is a perfect example of what happens to witches when they meddle in the natural order of things,¡± David said. ¡°In what way?¡± ¡°Well, aside from being so old her skin is as thin as paper, her soul is also demented from the inside out, like rotting fruit, Ara,¡± Jase said. ¡°Witchcraft eats the body and the soul when used for dark purposes,¡± David finished. ¡°But she is much too old to have once been the child Morgana.¡± ¡°Oh. Well, there goes that theory.¡± I moved my shoulders in a noncommittal gesture. ¡°So . . . if her soul is so rotten and dark, what would happen if she sanctioned herself a youthful, immortal body to occupy?¡± David went stiff, growing taller, his hands stopping short of the scrolls they were about to grab. ¡°I knew it,¡± Jason said. ¡°You two know more than you¡¯re letting on.¡± ¡°When it¡¯s your concern, brother, I will include you.¡± I slapped David¡¯s arm. ¡°Be nice. Jason can know if he wants.¡± ¡°Well, Safia won¡¯t get the chance to insert herself into our child. Here.¡± He handed a pile of scrolls to Jason. ¡°Put these away.¡± Jason just groaned, grabbing another stack of paper off the lamp table as he walked away. When the storage room door closed behind him with a high squeak, David turned to me. ¡°Ara, for Safia to insert a soul into a living being, she would need to untether the one already in place¡ªsomething that can only be done with the Dagger of Yahanna. Once I use it on Drake, its power will die with him.¡± ¡°And with you.¡± He leaned in and kissed my brow, closing his eyes. ¡°Give me an alternative, my love, and I¡¯d take it.¡± ¡°But, we could¡ª¡± ¡°A real alternative,¡± he said sharply and walked away, not noticing Jason behind him until they bumped shoulders. ¡°Sorry,¡± he said, and closed the storage room door gently behind him. Jason walked toward me, his steps graceful and light as the wind, and leaned against the table, folding his arms. ¡°Don¡¯t keep pressing him about jure uxoris, Ara,¡± he said. ¡°He¡¯ll never agree to it.¡± ¡°I know.¡± ¡°Then why do you keep bringing it up?¡± ¡°Guess I¡¯m just hoping.¡± ¡°Do yourself a favour¡ª¡± We both looked over at David through the windows, rummaging around in the storage area. ¡°Stop hoping.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t.¡± He sighed, standing up again. ¡°He¡¯s worried about you.¡± ¡°In what way?¡± ¡°He knows how bad you¡¯re hurting.¡± ¡°Good,¡± I said, smiling. ¡°Maybe he¡¯ll stay then.¡± ¡°No,¡± he said casually, packing away scrolls. ¡°He won¡¯t. He¡¯ll just go to his death with the burden of your aching soul on his.¡± My arms dropped to my sides, but I plastered a smile on as David came back in. ¡°We good?¡± he said to Jason, laying his hand on my arm. ¡°Yup. I¡¯ll finish up with these and lock the door on my way out.¡± ¡°Thanks, bro.¡± ¡°Any time.¡± Jase waved and headed into the storage room, leaving us alone in the total silence. The seconds-hand on David¡¯s watch ticked, keeping time to the beat of my heart, offering the comfort of noise in a completely wordless moment. I held my thoughts back from David, and he did the same with his own. When he realised I was practically paralysed, unable to speak for fear of saying something he didn¡¯t want to hear, he slid his touch down my arm and scooped up my hand. ¡°Bed?¡± I squeezed his fingertips, deciding right then that any pain I felt for losing him had to be felt alone. This was hard enough for David without me adding my broken heart to it. ¡°Yeah. But I don¡¯t wanna sleep.¡± ¡°What shall we do then?¡± ¡°Uuum, well, I have a few things I want to try out before my only company is a cat.¡± ¡°A cat?¡± David looked utterly confused. ¡°Yeah.¡± I started walking. ¡°You don¡¯t expect me to get married again once you¡¯re gone, do you?¡± He stayed behind for a second, but a burly laugh broke the silence in the room. It seemed like forever since I¡¯d heard him laugh in such a carefree way, maybe even as far back as our last day by the lake. ¡°Right. Well, in that case,¡± he said, stepping up to take my hand again. ¡°There are a few things I¡¯ve always wanted to do to you, mon amour.¡± ¡°Mm.¡± I closed my eyes, feeling the tingle of his words. ¡°Speak French to me, and you can do whatever you want.¡± He leaned in and whispered something in my ear, and I didn¡¯t care what it was, didn¡¯t care that the squeeze of his hand on the small of my back sent a thousand hot ideas into my mind because, whatever he said, it was definitely not in English. Chapter Five We stood against each other, arms by our sides, the backs of our fingers touching only by the finest hairs between them. We were like two individual flames meeting before blending as one¡ªthe heat intense but our skin immune, our bodies two, but our souls completely intertwined. My cotton nightdress felt like air along my craving skin¡ªlike a breath I wanted to exhale so I could feel the closeness of David¡¯s soon-to-be naked body against mine. We both knew what we were about to do wasn¡¯t just for the sake of being close or fulfilling primal needs: it went much deeper than that. The first time we ever made love with the hope we might fall pregnant, I was scared and unsure that¡¯s what I really wanted. And every time after that I¡¯d either been afraid it wouldn¡¯t happen, or afraid that, if it did, it¡¯d mean losing him. ¡°You okay?¡± David asked softly into the crown of my head, his warm breath forcing my eyes closed. I laid a hand across my belly, shaking slightly. ¡°My love?¡± He lifted my chin. ¡°What is it?¡± It had all changed. Every reason I ever had for wanting to make love to him had changed. I could finally hope it would bring the blessing of a little girl, and I wasn¡¯t scared, not about anything, not about being a young mom. Not about going it alone, without David. I wasn¡¯t even scared that I¡¯d mess it all up and fail as a parent. I opened my eyes and smiled, melting the concern in his. ¡°I can imagine it,¡± I said. ¡°Imagine her?¡± His hand cupped mine. ¡°Yeah. I can finally imagine what she¡¯ll be like.¡± His hand moved from my belly to wipe a tear from my cheek. ¡°Let¡¯s not imagine anymore, Ara.¡± ¡°I . . . I¡¯m afraid, though, David.¡± ¡°Of what?¡± His green eyes searched mine, so intense with depth and wisdom and strength that I felt silly for feeling fear when I should be thinking of nothing else but this moment. I was afraid it wouldn¡¯t happen, though¡ªafraid our baby wasn¡¯t possible, no matter what we did. But something in his eyes just made it all okay, like he¡¯d take care of it. Like nothing was impossible while I had him. ¡°Close your eyes,¡± he whispered in my ear, guiding my hand onto his heart. ¡°Let me make love to you.¡± ¡°Only if you let it last for forever.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t promise you forever, Ara. You know that.¡± ¡°Then at least make it last until the dawn.¡± ¡°That,¡± he said with a slowly shaping grin. ¡°I can promise.¡± I leaned back a little and took all of him in: he looked magnificent as king, as if he¡¯d grown an inch taller since he was sworn in and maybe even jumped a few points on the sex-appeal-o-meter. The stubble tracing his jawline had grown in over the day, shadowing his face like immortality¡¯s version of a Calvin Klein model. The white shirt he was wearing had been sewn from a fabric so soft it was almost a part of his body, falling over the contours of his chest like skin, leaving all the warmth on the surface as if he were naked already. I felt him under my hand, his chest moulding the cup of palm, the shirt parting at the buttons, inviting my fingertips inside. David smoothed the tip of his thumb from just under my earlobe and down my throat, his lips softly pushing my nightdress off my shoulder a little. ¡°I still can¡¯t believe how well I know every inch of you.¡± Gravity drew the fabric down the step he hadn¡¯t, and my skin fell open to the warm summer night as the top of the dress bunched around my elbows, leaving everything from my hips upward exposed and tingling slightly with little bumps. Both his hands trailed firmly down my back, following its shape like a hand tracing a distant skyline of smooth rolling hills. I held my breath, afraid to breathe a moment of this realness. My hand sat against his chest, his body solid and alive beneath it, yet my mind floated along the memory of the first time I saw him smile¡ªthe gentle half-turn of his lip, the way he¡¯d hide the thoughts he could hear, trying so hard not to give anything away about how they made him feel. I saw him as that boy I sat beside at the piano on my first day of school, felt the ache rise from my gut to my chest, knowing I could never go back. All that was gone. And those memories were all I¡¯d have left soon, never to make any more. When I looked up, the hold of his round, black eyes on mine nearly burned a hole in me, his tears clouding them, so restrained I just wanted to cry for him. But he blinked and they slipped past his lashes, falling eternally away to the land of forgotten things. In this moment, we were here, alive, and one day, he¡¯d be gone. I¡¯d stand here in this memory, touching the air as if I could feel him there, but I¡¯d only be able to imagine what it felt like once to know his warmth, to feel the way his hands moved over my body in ways I couldn¡¯t even dream up. And I knew he felt every breath of my pain as he read the thoughts that provoked it. ¡°I¡¯ll never be far away, Ara.¡± He drew me closer by the small of my back, and as my hands dropped to my sides, the nightgown slipped past, falling at our feet. ¡°I¡¯ll leave a part of myself behind in you.¡± ¡°And every time I look at her, I¡¯ll die a little more.¡± ¡°No, you won¡¯t.¡± He kissed my hair. ¡°You¡¯ll know what it feels like to love again.¡± I stood on my toes, reaching up to cup my hands behind his neck, our lips connecting a breath later. But the kiss only broke my heart¡ªthe supple warmth of his lips, so lovingly wrapped up in mine, were so exquisite in their hold that the only emotion they could possibly convey was love: unending, unconditional love. The kind of love I would never have again. I angled my chin so I could feel the slight prickle of his stubble, a feeling that always made him real, present¡ªone I could always find when I closed my eyes, even if he wasn¡¯t here. Every breath of that kiss would become a moment locked away¡ªstored for the day it would only be something I opened at night, when I lay in bed with my eyes closed¡ªour forever lived in a series of events that already happened. Page 25 ¡°But we have tonight,¡± he said, waking me from my thought with a firm hand cupping my cheek. ¡°My love, don¡¯t go there. Just be here, in this moment, with me.¡±Advertisement ¡°Okay.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± David¡¯s hands went under my bottom, prompting me to jump up and wrap my legs around his hips. He carried me slowly to the bed, falling down on top of me; the sheets and pillows rising up like clouds around us. I felt the softness of them under my bare skin, each tiny inch tingling as if this was the first touch. And David¡¯s mouth found mine again, the sweet kisses growing with the desire heating his blood, his hand folding around my breast, smoothing a path for his lips to follow. ¡°There are so many things we¡¯ve never done,¡± he said under the kiss. ¡°So many I planned to do right now, but¡ª¡± He leaned back and smiled down at me. ¡°Tonight, I think I just wanna love you.¡± Those words rushed into my heart, taking the thoughts and desires he showed me earlier, and tossing them aside. All I wanted now was to feel his bare chest pressed to mine, his hands on my hips, our bodies connected closer than humanly, or immortally possible. ¡°Okay.¡± I guided him gently backward and rolled onto my knees, sweeping his shirt up his waist. ¡°Then we need you naked.¡± ¡°You read my mind.¡± He tossed his shirt aside and brought his arms back down to his sides¡ªhis ribs expanding, showing the skeleton beneath. ¡°You¡¯re so thin now, David.¡± I cupped his ribs with both hands and kissed the hollow between his breastbones. ¡°That happens when you¡¯re stressed about leaving the love of your life.¡± I stopped kissing and just rested my brow against his soft belly for a moment, feeling my hair sweep off my face under David¡¯s fingertips. ¡°Don¡¯t be sad, my love. Remember? Tonight isn¡¯t about the future.¡± ¡°It¡¯s pretty hard to ignore.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± I heard a smile shape his words. ¡°I think I can take your mind off it.¡± I laughed breathily and, with tears wetting my lips, began my important task of kissing every inch of his skin from his ribs to his jeans again. As I reached his belly button, he drew his stomach in, trying not laugh. ¡°Does that tickle?¡± I asked. ¡°Yes, but don¡¯t stop.¡± He smoothed both thumbs down my head, resting his fingertips gently to the base of my skull, and I felt him grow harder near my throat¡ªpushing against the zipper of his jeans. I could smell him, almost taste him¡ªthe sweet chocolate mixed with the familiar but very slight scent of the day¡¯s sweat. He¡¯d never let me get this close before, never opened himself up this way. It was as if there were no walls between us now; we were finally free to explore all those things we¡¯d been afraid to share. He¡¯d even stopped waxing all his hair off, his chest now sprouting a few hairs around his nipples¡ªmy tongue noticing the fine trail from his navel downward. I pinched the top of his zipper then and slid it down, rolling the waist of his jeans and briefs past his hips, seeing the head of his penis grow as my fingertips brushed past it. And my blood boiled with a naughty idea. ¡°I can see what you¡¯re thinking, my love.¡± He stopped me. ¡°I want to know what it feels like,¡± I said, half suggesting, half asking. ¡°Ara, you know how I feel about that.¡± ¡°I know.¡± I looked at the patch of dark hair below his V of muscles. ¡°But I just want to try it, just once.¡± The thoughts in his mind flickered like a broken light for a second, finally deciding that it was better if I satisfied my curiosity with him than with another man after he was gone. ¡°Okay.¡± He exhaled, and tangled his fingers in my hair, guiding my mouth toward him. I had no idea what to actually do, and wasn¡¯t really sure what to expect, either, but as I delicately wrapped my fingers around him, following his length to the base, I was no longer afraid I¡¯d do it wrong. None of it mattered. There was no self-consciousness here. Not between us. We were in love. We were married, and if I wasn¡¯t perfect, it just didn¡¯t matter anymore. I knew he¡¯d love me anyway. I wet my lips and guided him closer, closing my mouth around him as he let out a quiet gasp. His hands shook against my head, his thighs clenching to hold himself up on the squishy bed, and my naked skin tightened with bumps, cooled by the air from his nose, the draught deeper, stronger each time my tongue made circles. ¡°That. Feels¡ª¡± He drew tight breaths through his teeth. ¡°Amazing.¡± My shoulders relaxed a little then, and as I moved my grip down the length of him, I felt him grow harder¡ªthe salty liquid thickening slightly under my tongue. ¡°Aw, Ara.¡± His hips pressed closer to my face, his hand cupping the back of my head as he went deeper into my mouth, stopping where my tongue blocked my throat. ¡°I¡¯m not sure I can take anymore,¡± he said, and slowly eased himself from my mouth, leaning down to kiss me softly after. ¡°That felt way too good.¡± ¡°Really?¡± I straightened my spine to meet him face to face, and leaned back a bit, sliding my tongue across the moisture left behind. He nodded, gently moving me backward on the bed. And I saw the thoughts in his mind then¡ªsaw him imagine sweeping me down onto my back and sliding my underwear off, tossing them across the room¡ªboth of us laughing as he pictured them landing on the lampshade. ¡°Lay back so I can taste you,¡± he ordered sweetly. I tucked my thumbs into my undies and slid them off as I landed on my back, parting my legs for him. But his eyes moved to my belly instead, his hands flowing swiftly to land under his gaze, stopping there for a second. ¡°I¡¯m going to do this right for once, Ara, and we¡¯re gonna have a baby.¡± ¡°I feel that, too,¡± I said. ¡°I think this time it¡¯ll happen.¡± He leaned down and kissed my stomach, pressing his lips firmly into the skin just above my pubic bone. I held onto him, winding my fingertips through his hair. ¡°God, your scent is so familiar,¡± he said in that deep, David-y tone, moving his lips down a few inches, stealing my breath as his tongue parted the hairs in one long sweep upward. ¡°And you taste so lovely I could kiss you here for hours.¡± My whole body shivered, my legs spreading wider than I knew they could. I felt his finger slide in and brush a part that sent the shiver deeper, expanding the muscles inside me. I could smell it¡ªthe scent of sex and desire, like a cloud of heat in the dying summer air around us. And as I drew a breath, committing it to memory, felt it suddenly on my lips, tasted it on my tongue under David¡¯s mouth against mine. It didn¡¯t really have much of a taste, or maybe I just didn¡¯t notice it, but it left my mind as soon as it entered, because David gently guided himself inside me, filling my body with the hardness that had been in my mouth only minutes ago. I wrapped my legs around his hips, digging my fingertips into the skin on his back, bunching it up tightly¡ªmy own little handful of David. For once, I owned this moment¡ªowned the love, the energy, the truth finally between us. All the lies, all the secrets had come undone, and all that was left was his love for me, and mine for him. I didn¡¯t need to guard my thoughts. I didn¡¯t feel angry or resentful to him for keeping things from me. I felt closer to him than I ever had before, and I, finally, closed my eyes and prayed to the gods to bless us¡ªbless this moment with a little baby girl. The past was coming undone with each breath he took, each movement against me. None of it mattered anymore. Everything we¡¯d done to hurt each other was no longer important, because all that mattered right now, in this moment, was life. I came back down to earth, and David smiled his secret smile, seeing me suddenly faze back in. ¡°Where do you go?¡± he asked. ¡°You couldn¡¯t see?¡± He wrapped his hands under my bottom and guided my hips closer to his, driving himself gently and slowly inside me, as if he didn¡¯t ever want this to end. ¡°I can never see your thoughts when you do that¡ªwhen you faze out. It¡¯s like you¡¯re not even in there.¡± ¡°Maybe another out of body experience?¡± I suggested, making a little squeak at the end as he hit a very sensitive spot. He laughed, his lovely teeth showing, taking me back to our first date at Betty¡¯s for a second. ¡°I think this is really more of an out-of-this-world experience.¡± I wrapped my legs tighter around him where they¡¯d slipped with the sweat. I didn¡¯t care how hot and sticky we were, though. It was his sweat and my sweat, and I just wanted him, all of him, to be all over me. ¡°I think we¡¯re gonna need a change of sheets,¡± he noted, looking at the bed under me. ¡°I dunno¡ª¡± I twisted my shoulder to the right and pressed my hand to his rib, shoving him down on the bed¡ªflipping myself around so I came to rest with my legs either side of his hips. I felt him go deeper inside me in this position, saw the shock in his eyes as he studied my naked body on top of his. ¡°I think I like the idea of sleeping in a puddle of our own love.¡± ¡°And I think I like you on top.¡± He reached for my breast, and I grabbed his wrist, guiding it gently above his head, sliding both my hands up his and linking our fingers. The world moved with the rhythm I decided¡ªa slow beat, each swing of my hips, each time I took him deeper inside me, like the roll of a wave on the shore, lap by lap, and I owned him. He lifted his hips to meet mine in the middle, closing his eyes as he set his pace to mine, enjoying me, enjoying my body. But he couldn¡¯t just lay back and let me have full control. I knew that. I could feel the burn to govern this rising up in his hands like electricity. He broke free of my grip and cupped my waist, moving me to his own pace, much faster and a little harder than before. ¡°What?¡± I said, noticing something odd in his gaze. ¡°Why are you looking at me like that?¡± The sharp smile made his eyes small, his head moving side to side for a second. ¡°You¡¯re pretty darn hot when you¡¯re being seductive, Ara.¡± ¡°Is that so?¡± I leaned forward and placed both hands on his chest, pushing down slightly so my hips rose off his¡ªthe warmth there going cool. ¡°Yes, but¡ª¡± He flipped me through the air and landed on top of me, wrapping both my legs tightly around his hips. ¡°I much prefer creative control.¡± ¡°Creative control?¡± I said, a brow arching. He smiled down at my nakedness, shrugging one shoulder after. ¡°Or maybe just control.¡± A rush of excitement filled my gut. I kinda liked that, too. ¡°As long as you don¡¯t start tying me up.¡± His eyes narrowed into cheeky slits. ¡°If I did, you wouldn¡¯t be able to stop me.¡± ¡°Yes, I would,¡± I said playfully, learning something new about myself then: I wasn¡¯t sure I¡¯d want to stop him. ¡°I could just say no.¡± Page 26 He moved closer and pressed his lips to mine in a long, very slow and very wet kiss. ¡°Not if I gag you.¡±Advertisement I went to say something witty, but couldn¡¯t help laughing instead. ¡°Mmm, don¡¯t do that.¡± He leaned back a bit, closing his eyes, moving inside me again. ¡°You know how much that giggle stirs my inner vampire.¡± ¡°And you know how much your inner vampire turns me on.¡± I accompanied my statement with a quick flick of my nail down his chest, making him bleed. His chin rolled so his gaze settled on the cut. ¡°Perhaps I will have to tie you up.¡± My insides tightened. ¡°I dare you to.¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± He was too shocked to actually do it, though. He just closed his mouth, keeping a tight smile there, and ran his hand firmly down my arm, cupping my wrist and pinning it to the bed by my hip. ¡°I swore I¡¯d never be that way with you, Ara.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because that kind of thing is not for you. It¡¯s for whores.¡± I huffed. ¡°Whores?¡± ¡°It¡¯s just how I feel.¡± He brought my wrist up above my head, his hand wrapping it so tight the blood filled my fingertips. ¡°Then why are you holding me like that?¡± His fingers loosened. ¡°Look, I love you, Ara. And no matter how much I want to, I would never do anything disrespectful to you.¡± ¡°Maybe I like that kind of disrespect.¡± He laughed, and the sweet warmth of his breath brushed over my lashes, flavouring my tongue a little with orange chocolate. ¡°Yes, I think you¡¯ve always been a bit twisted, my love. Perhaps it¡¯s all the torture you suffered.¡± ¡°Then what¡¯s your excuse?¡± I said, and he stopped pumping. ¡°You clearly want to do those things to me.¡± He cleared his throat. ¡°I¡¯m just mentally deranged from years of inflicting heinous punishments on the stripped and restrained bodies of lawbreakers.¡± ¡°So, it¡¯s okay for you to be twisted, but not me?¡± ¡°Yes, because you are my sweet, pure-souled little wife, Ara. And I won¡¯t taint you the way I¡¯ve been tainted.¡± I shook my head, sending my incredulous smile across the room, away from him. ¡°I¡¯m not as pure as you think I am.¡± He cupped both my cheeks and kissed my lips once. ¡°I¡¯m going to die soon, Ara. Let me go peacefully to my death with the notion that my involvement in your life hasn¡¯t ruined you, please.¡± I laid both hands above my head, crossing my wrists like they were bound; my body long and open to all he wanted from me. ¡°Maybe you¡¯ll just have to stick around until I¡¯m all sweet and innocent again then.¡± He laughed and caged both my hands in one of his. ¡°You¡¯re going to be sorry you did that.¡± ¡°Are you going to spank me?¡± ¡°Do you want me to?¡± I nodded, smiling playfully. ¡°Okay, but remember, you asked for it,¡± he warned. ¡°I can take whatever you can dish out.¡± He bit his lip, his fang making a deep impression in the skin, and reached down, leaving a gentle but sharp sting across the firmest part of my thigh, almost on my bottom. I jumped a little, my leg tightening, but the rush of heat only tingled, making my skin want more. ¡°That didn¡¯t hurt.¡± ¡°It¡¯s not supposed to hurt,¡± he said. ¡°What¡¯s it supposed to do?¡± ¡°Open you up¡ªtake something from you that you wouldn¡¯t give to anyone else.¡± ¡°What¡¯s that?¡± ¡°Control. Permission to hurt you.¡± He paused, letting the words simmer through me. ¡°The right to do whatever I want with the trust that I¡¯ll draw the line before it gets too much. The feeling of opening up¡ªexperiencing something we normally run from¡ªin a completely open, completely vulnerable situation.¡± I thought about the emotions that little smack stirred in me, seeing myself tense and flinch as the pain flared, my soul suddenly connecting with him after the sting dissolved. ¡°You do realise you¡¯re tainting me right now.¡± He wet his lips and ran his thumb slowly up my chin, pulling my mouth apart. ¡°Maybe that was always inevitable.¡± ¡°As was the hurt,¡± I said sadly. His hand rested over my breast, his fingers pressing firmly to feel my heart. ¡°I know you¡¯re suffering, Ara. But I will leave you with a child, at least. I promise.¡± I nodded, placing my hand over his. ¡°Then you better make love to me, David. I don¡¯t want our child conceived while you¡¯re spanking me.¡± He laughed, falling on his elbows, his silky, naked body completely touching mine, and brought his hand up to sweep my sweaty hair off my brow. ¡°Look at you.¡± ¡°What?¡± I said self-consciously. ¡°You¡¯ve grown up so much, Ara, but you¡¯ll always be that sweet girl I fell in love with on the football field at school.¡± I looked up at his perfect dark pink lips, then at the long lashes surrounding those emerald eyes, and I could still see so much of the boy he would always be to me¡ªthe sweet, funny, carefree guy I sometimes missed. But that was fading¡ªwashing away to reveal the man inside me right now. My king. My husband. Strong. A fighter. A man willing to die, willing to do anything to see that I never went a day again in my life looking over my shoulder. And his face changed then, his body moving faster against mine, his eyes turning dark and black as he reached the point of no return, becoming the man who would one day be the father my daughter never knew. I held back my cries, the lusted breath of ecstasy, the tears and the rage, and just wrapped him up tight in my arms, feeling him release his life force into my body, spreading hope and light throughout. I didn¡¯t want to orgasm. I didn¡¯t want to feel the pleasure of the moment; I just wanted to remember what it felt like to hold him this way¡ªto love him with all my heart¡ªno other distractions in the world. So I drove my fingers into his hair, his shoulder pressing my jaw with the closeness, his body so heavy I couldn''t breathe, and just held him tighter¡ªthe muscles in my arms flexed and rigid to keep him close. I¡¯d never let him pull away. He was everything to me, just as I was everything to him, and we held each other as this truth rained through our tired, sweaty bodies, relaxing us down through the scales of exhaustion, breath by breath. He rested his weight on top of me, his elbows propping him up, and stroked my hair behind my ear a few times, taking in all of me¡ªtaking in my smile, my eyes, my scent, my skin, the wetness, the heat, the breathlessness. We laid that way, David going soft inside me, connected and unwilling to part, wordless but speaking volumes in silence, until we both turned our heads and watched the glimmer of red sunlight kiss the horizon on the far side of the world. I felt the presence of the hunter behind me, his eagle eye anticipating my every move. But he couldn¡¯t read my mind, thank goodness, which meant he could only guess what I was about to do. Ever since that cursed day I fell off the lighthouse, Mike had slowly and surely managed to get his own way again and have guards all over the manor. It was downright annoying. Especially since the business I had to attend was not for Falcon¡¯s ears, nor was it for the four men standing guard between the windows on every corridor and on every door of the manor. They were sworn to absolute secrecy about any and all private business that occurred, but I still didn¡¯t trust them. My red summer dress, so fitting for such a devilish mission, reflected the morning light back against the white walls to my right, making them pink, and my shadow danced beside me, flickering and dipping, lengthening over Arthur¡¯s door then wrapping the corner to the stairwell before I reached it. I glanced back inconspicuously to check Falcon¡¯s shadow, then turned the corner and headed down the stairs, taking a very quick right on the second floor, my fast feet putting sudden and great distance between my guard and I. ¡°Ara?¡± he called quietly, careful not to disturb any manor guests. But he¡¯d never find me. I closed Jason¡¯s door so slowly that the only sound it made as it clipped gently into place had no more volume than the back being snapped fast on an earring. ¡°Ara?¡± he tried again, his voice drifting toward the wrong end of the manor. He knew he¡¯d been given the slip, and I¡¯d been caught giving him the slip enough that knew I had very little time before he picked up my scent and followed me here. Except, by the time he figured it out, I¡¯d be long gone, leaving him with nothing but the burning question on his mind as he¡¯d scratch his head, muttering, Where the hell did she go? Before executing my ¡®Houdini¡¯ escape, though, I took a moment to look around the small space. Unlike the other rooms in the manor, this was undersized by the plaster wall hiding the secret room beside it but, despite the lack of space, still overflowed with Jason¡¯s personality. It was set out much the same as Arthur¡¯s room: a redwood canopy bed to the left, swathed in rich auburn blankets and pillows; a fireplace between two windows, except Jase only had one window, and a long oak table across from the foot of the bed. But, unlike Arthur¡¯s room, Jase¡¯s was painted blue between the white panels on the walls, and instead of plants and books about plants, his shelves were stuffed to overflowing with novels and comic books. His baseball cap sat on the tall drawers between the window and his bed, a pile of books stacked on the floor beside it, almost as high as the ledge, clearly used as some kind of footstool while he sat there in the nook, reading, and a small cluster of clothes littered the blanket box. It was exactly as I¡¯d imagine it should be. I walked over to the oak table and spread the collection of papers aside to see what he¡¯d been doing. Several cartoon sketches of dragons, and girls with big eyes and long, blue hair, stared back up at me. I knew he was talented, but most people I¡¯d met that could draw were good at either real-life or cartoon. Not both. Jase was clearly just too talented. I picked up a picture and ran my fingers over the lines of a dog¡¯s face and the speech bubble above its head, moving my touch then to the cursive signature on the bottom right corner. I¡¯d never really paid much attention to his handwriting, but it did say a lot about him¡ªeach long, smooth stroke of the pen tip over the page that led to the tall then rounded lines of the J and the O, shorter, more decisive strokes on the A and the N, and the S almost non-existent. He never really owned his name. I knew that. It was a name given to him by his father because it was against the law not to name a child. David told me their father had flipped through the paper until he found the front page news about a cad named Jason Fruge, a rat of a man that rained devastation on their town, selling high-interest loans to the already poor and destitute then taking their homes when they couldn¡¯t pay. And Jason saw this name as a role he¡¯d one day live up to: a sign, a signature, that illustrated everything impure and childish and dishonest about this offcut of a boy. But all I saw was a strong warrior with a heart so big and so kind it allowed the innocence of boyhood to shine through, despite everything he¡¯d done or suffered. I would never believe he was the ¡®leftovers¡¯ of centuries of evil being drained from one bloodline, not for as long as I¡¯d live. Page 27 I placed the page back down and hugged myself. This room and everything in it held a certain amount of personality that Jason didn¡¯t carry with him out in the real world, and it smelled like him, so rich with everything that made me love him, that I walked toward the secret door to Eve¡¯s room with a bit more of a brisk stride than I intended.Advertisement If I could have avoided coming this way, I would have. But the secret passage from my room was off limits while David was in there, awake. He¡¯d hear it the second it opened, and I didn¡¯t have all day to wait for him to finish reading his book. Once his mind was set on a few hours of relaxation, he would do exactly that. And, unfortunately for me, the secret room was the only way I could escape Falcon. It wasn¡¯t like I could just close my bedroom door, wander down the corridor to find Morgaine and have a chat with her. Falcon would overhear, then tell Mike what I¡¯d said, and then it¡¯d all get back David, who¡¯d be mad at me for talking to Morgaine in the first place, since he clearly had some underlying reason he didn¡¯t want me to. Unfortunately for him, though, I wasn¡¯t quite as naive and trusting as I had been a few weeks ago. I pushed the panel to Eve¡¯s room so the door popped open, then tiptoed inside, closing the portal behind me. The room was dark and undisturbed, still stale from the last conversation that was held in here. I could almost feel the tension and confusion lingering within the very air I was breathing. It seemed nothing in here was ever affected by time, not even memories. I shook it off and walked across the room to the bookshelf disguising a secret door that led down a stairwell and into a tunnel that would take me to the small Lilithian village, Lamia, on the other side of the island. From there, I¡¯d be able to speedily run back here and seek out Morgaine¡ªfree from a certain giant Mike-alike. Sure, it was a great length to go to, but this was Falcon I was running from¡ªnot Quaid. It took great lengths just to stop him hearing me take a pee in the bathroom every day. Dust gathered under my fingertips as I traced the spines of the old books, feeling for the loose one. When I pulled back on it, though, it shifted downward, but the secret door didn¡¯t open. I pulled again and again, finally giving up with a little groan. Clearly, it would take greater lengths to escape Falcon than I realised. The door was sealed in place, like it was unlatched or the connection had just disintegrated over time. ¡°Damn it,¡± I huffed, looking down at my summery dress. The only option left now was to jump from the window, and hope no one saw me do it. I quietly unhitched the wooden panel from the loose nail over the window and laid it to the ground, peering out through the glass. The coast was clear, but the distance from here to my clear coast was a pretty big drop. Had I been better at math, I might have even been able to guess exactly how far it was, but it didn¡¯t matter. I had to jump because I just had to talk to Morgaine. So, here I sat, butt on the window ledge, feet dangling over the second story drop, taking a mouthful of air to give me courage. ¡°You¡¯re a vampire, Ara. Just jump,¡± I told myself. Myself didn¡¯t move. ¡°Fine,¡± I said. ¡°I¡¯ll throw you.¡± And as I was about to slip easily off the ledge and drop to a graceful landing, the air wrapped my feet and legs and hands, and came out of my gob in a long scream. The ground rose up too fast¡ªway too fast for me to calculate the angle of my feet against the speed of attack. I covered my eyes, readying myself for the impact, when a neck-twisting jolt sent shockwaves through my bones, a large pair of hands wrapping my ribs and falling under my knees before the ground smacked my hiney. ¡°Goddamn it, Ara,¡± Falcon growled, placing me gently on the ground. ¡°Where did you come from?¡± I gasped, pulling my dress down to cover my undies. ¡°Never mind that.¡± He stepped back and rubbed his head, cursing under his breath. ¡°You scared the living hell out of me. What were you thinking?¡± I looked up at the window, and the wavering ghost of Eve smiled down at me, covering her mouth. ¡°I . . . I was trying to escape you.¡± ¡°You should know better than that by now, Ara.¡± He straightened up, rolling his shoulders back. ¡°I mean, Your Majesty.¡± I laughed. ¡°You didn¡¯t need to rush in all white-knighty and save me. I would have been okay if I¡¯d hit the ground, Falcon.¡± ¡°I know. And if I¡¯d given you about two more seconds, you would have corrected the fall, but I wasn¡¯t willing to risk it.¡± He rubbed his hand firmly across his heart. ¡°No offence, but if you¡¯re gonna turn yourself into royal stew, do it on someone else¡¯s watch.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry. It¡¯s just¡ª¡± ¡°Just?¡± ¡°I think someone pushed me.¡± He looked up at the window, taking a quick step forward. ¡°Who?¡± Eve pressed her finger to her lip. ¡°No one.¡± I looked back at Falcon. ¡°I¡¯m stupid. I just fell, is all.¡± ¡°Ara,¡± he said, issuing me one raised brow. ¡°I follow you for eight hours every day of your life. You¡¯re not stupid. And you didn¡¯t fall. So don¡¯t try to play dumb with me. Who pushed you?¡± I bit my lip. He¡¯d never believe me. ¡°Eve?¡± he suggested. My mouth fell open below wide eyes, and when my head whipped up to the second floor window, Eve was gone. ¡°You saw her?¡± His gaze slowly came back down to mine. ¡°No.¡± ¡°Then how did you. . .¡± ¡°I¡¯ve seen you talking to thin air¡ªheard you say her name.¡± And a sudden rush of panic flooded me. ¡°Falcon, you can¡¯t say anything to Da¡ª¡± ¡°I won¡¯t.¡± He held up his hand, stopping me right there. ¡°Everything you do, say, or see, is privileged information, Majesty.¡± ¡°But not to Mike. He¡¯s¡ª¡± ¡°He¡¯s not the one I report to.¡± ¡°Then . . .¡± I stood a little taller. ¡°Who is?¡± ¡°Me.¡± I frowned. ¡°I¡¯m acting Head of Queen¡¯s Guard.¡± ¡°Really?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± He nodded once. ¡°They report to me now.¡± I couldn''t believe my ears. ¡°Why did Mike put you in charge?¡± ¡°Because he has other things to do¡ªmore important than worrying about what you¡¯re doing. He has an entire Knight¡¯s Core to run.¡± ¡°Whoa.¡± I placed my hand on my brow, blowing a puff of air out through one corner of my mouth. ¡°That is messing with my head.¡± Falcon laughed. ¡°Well, it¡¯s how things are now. And if you ever¡ª¡± He held one finger up in emphasis, ¡°¡ªattempt an escape like that again, I will quit my job and put Mike back in charge. Got it?¡± I saluted. ¡°Yes, sir.¡± ¡°Right. Now.¡± He grabbed me very gently by the arm and led me into the shadows closer to the manor. ¡°Where were you going, and why?¡± ¡°I can¡¯t tell you.¡± ¡°Actually, you can.¡± ¡°No, I can¡¯t.¡± He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. It amazed me how much he was like Mike, with his sandy blond hair, his bulky frame, his warm eyes that were quite smiley when he wasn¡¯t looking at me, and the sternness that afforded him command of the room without solicitation. ¡°Can you give me a chance?¡± he said. ¡°A chance?¡± ¡°Yes. A chance, Ara.¡± He stepped closer to make his point. ¡°I¡¯m a member of your personal council. I¡¯m your bodyguard and the one man responsible for your overall safety. I¡¯m trusted by both your husband and, more importantly, your overly-protective best friend.¡± We both chuckled softly. ¡°If Mike can trust me, maybe you can give me a chance, Ara. Because in order for me to keep you safe, I need to be sure you won¡¯t try to run off on me when you have something you want to do but don¡¯t think I¡¯ll approve of. So. . .¡± He took another long breath. ¡°Let me earn your trust.¡± ¡°It¡¯s a matter of security, Falcon, to do with information I¡¯ve learned¡ªfrom David,¡± I added so he didn¡¯t think I was being easily led. ¡°And he asked me not to let anyone know, not even the council.¡± Falcon nodded, taking a step back. ¡°I respect that.¡± ¡°But?¡± I said, waiting for the ¡®but.¡¯ ¡°No buts.¡± He raised both hands. ¡°If you have good reason not to tell me, then just tell me that, Ara. Just tell me you need to take care of some business, and I¡¯ll back off for an hour or so. Okay?¡± My face went blank. I could feel it. ¡°Are you being serious right now?¡± ¡°I¡¯m running the show here, Ara.¡± He presented the proverbial show. ¡°Mike might not have trusted you before, but I trust you. I think you¡¯re a very smart girl, and I think you have grown up monumentally in the last two months, and if you say you need privacy for a bit, then I respect that.¡± I just wanted to hug him. I nodded once instead, reminding myself that knights are not friends. ¡°Thank you, Falcon.¡± He bowed his head, placing both hands behind his back. ¡°You¡¯re welcome.¡± I left Falcon in the garden and followed ¡®last sighting¡¯ reports from bystanders until I found my wrath-recipient wandering down an empty corridor in the servant quarters. There was no one around at this time of day so, despite the sub-level of the manor not exactly being a cone of silence, it seemed like as good a place as any to bark my fury on the unsuspecting target. ¡°Morgaine!¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°You lied to me.¡± She watched me walk toward her, growing slightly taller. ¡°I did?¡± ¡°The Immortal Damned¡ªthe prophecy, which is really a contract. And worse, your lies, David¡¯s lies¡ªall of them have gone so deep you¡¯ve had to convince the entire Lilithian public of the same.¡± I stopped in front of her, closing the door beside me to block out the white light spilling into the hall. ¡°What are you hiding?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not hiding anything, Majesty, and neither is David.¡± I bit my teeth together. I knew my face was as stone and hard as the statue of Lilith in the fountain outside, but so was my resolve. She was damn well going to at least confess, or this stone face would be last thing she saw. ¡°Okay, so I made up a prophecy¡ª¡± ¡°That¡¯s a pretty big deal, Morgaine. That¡¯s a pretty frickin¡¯ huge lie to carry all these centuries.¡± ¡°I know, but. . .¡± She made a small gap between her fingers, her neck shrinking into her shoulders a little. ¡°It was just a teensy stretch of the truth.¡± I rolled my eyes, dropping my folded arms. ¡°Knowing the conditions in which the lie about the prophecy was forged, Morgaine, I can forgive that. I mean, really, I¡¯m not surprised. None of the prophecy crap ever made sense anyway, but. . .¡± I angled my head to one side, my open palms rolling outward with my shrug. ¡°You lied to me about the Damned, and maintained that lie all this time.¡± Page 28 ¡°I got scared, Amara.¡± She brushed her hand down my arm. I jerked away. ¡°Our people have been suffering for centuries. They were locked away, tortured, forced to torture other vampires at Drake¡¯s will. And it was unnatural. We couldn''t live that way any longer. Then, after Jason hurt you, I thought you wanted to die. I thought you were going to commit suicide, and I just couldn¡¯t think. I told you there was a way to help the Damned before I even realised what I¡¯d said. And you didn¡¯t even look up at me until I said you could free them. After that, I had to do some pretty darn fast thinking to reshape that lie.¡±Advertisement ¡°So, only you and David know the truth about the Damned¡ªthat I can¡¯t, and my child can¡¯t, fix them?¡± ¡°Yes. You''ve not been made a fool of, Ara. It took some work, but I convinced Emily and Mike, too.¡± ¡°And what about Arthur? Did you convince him, too? Because he just went right on along with it¡ªeven told me he wanted to be free?¡± ¡°He wasn¡¯t lying, Amara. He wanted freedom. But not from immortality.¡± ¡°Then, from what?¡± ¡°From his bind to Drake¡ªan eternal bind.¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°I mean . . . he wanted you to use your venom to kill him once all this was over.¡± I covered my mouth. ¡°Why?¡± ¡°He wants peace: death. He wanted a family, a wife, a normal life, but he will never have that. Joining our fight was his way of setting things right¡ªhis penance to God for all the wrong he¡¯s done, you might say. Once the humans and the Lilithians are safe, Amara, he. . .¡± She looked down at her feet, shaking her head. I slowly rolled my chin to my chest. ¡°And when were you going to tell me this?¡± ¡°I wasn¡¯t. And neither was he.¡± ¡°But he promised he¡¯d stay. He¡ª¡± ¡°And he will keep that promise to you now, My Queen.¡± She rushed in and touched my shoulder. ¡°He¡¯s not going anywhere. You gave him new reason to live.¡± ¡°Me? How?¡± ¡°He loves you, Amara, like the daughter he never had. And he has everything he ever wanted: his nephews are safe and well, away from the plague of Drake¡¯s darkness. He has the lab he always begged for.¡± She smiled fondly, hugging herself. ¡°And he has a precious little girl to worry and fuss over.¡± I smirked. ¡°Precious?¡± ¡°You must know he holds you in high regard, Amara. You¡¯re more precious to him than even his nephews, I believe.¡± ¡°I doubt that, Morg. But . . . are you sure? I mean, are you sure he doesn¡¯t still want to di¡ª¡± ¡°I¡¯m sure.¡± She nodded once. ¡°He swore to David in his own blood that he¡¯d stay here and care for you after David¡¯s gone.¡± ¡°If he wants to protect me so bad, maybe he should kill Drake himself.¡± She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. ¡°This whole thing¡¯s a mess, isn¡¯t it?¡± I covered my head with my hands for a second. ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Is there anything I can do to set things right?¡± ¡°It would help if everyone in my Council sat down in a room and unveiled all the truths they¡¯ve been hiding, you know, a massive heart-to-heart type of thing.¡± ¡°If it would serve the queen well, perhaps you should arrange this.¡± I laughed. ¡°Yeah, right. I¡¯m sure everyone will participate equally.¡± Morgaine moved one shoulder up slowly. ¡°You never know who might surprise you as the one who reveals the most secrets, Amara.¡± ¡°What¡¯s that supposed to mean?¡± She eyed me critically. ¡°Nothing. Anyway, there was something else you wanted to ask me, wasn¡¯t there?¡± ¡°Yes. How did you¡ª?¡± ¡°My ability to understand another person goes a little deeper than pure empathy, My Queen. What did you want to know?¡± My arms fell heavily to my sides with the breath I exhaled. ¡°What do you know about Lilith¡¯s children?¡± ¡°Um.¡± She frowned. ¡°Not much. Why?¡± ¡°Morgana.¡± ¡°What about her?¡± ¡°David found some more information on her¡ª¡± ¡°Where?¡± ¡°In the Scroll Room.¡± ¡°Where in there?¡± She took one step in that direction. ¡°I¡¯ve been right through there. I never found anything.¡± ¡°Didn¡¯t know you were looking.¡± ¡°Of course I was. I¡¯m trying to piece this together as much as you are. So¡ª¡± She rolled her hand at the wrist, prompting me. ¡°What did he find?¡± ¡°She was a half-blood witch. We think Drake may have her¡ªif she lived.¡± ¡°Why would Drake have her?¡± I shrugged. ¡°Well, where is she? Where did she go? If she simply died, there¡¯d be more information on her. Someone has gone to great lengths to ensure no one ever asked questions about her.¡± Morgaine nodded thoughtfully. ¡°True. But, why would Drake have her? Maybe she¡¯s alive, living out there somewhere.¡± ¡°Because Drake killed anyone who had any allegiance to Lilith, but Morgana was probably very powerful, maybe served a purpose. Or maybe he¡¯s just kept her to torture her all these years for being the blood of Lilith.¡± ¡°Torturing her?¡± Morgaine nearly rocketed forward, then sobered herself, straightening her shirt. ¡°He wouldn¡¯t do that.¡± ¡°Why not? He did it to me, and he ordered his own son¡¯s death.¡± ¡°What son?¡± ¡°The boy, the blond one I killed at the castle.¡± She frowned, her eyes drifting down the hall. ¡°That wasn¡¯t his son.¡± ¡°Yes, it was. Arthur told me¡ª¡± ¡°Oh.¡± She nodded, smiling to herself. ¡°Arthur told you.¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Why did he tell you that?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know. We were just talking and¡ª¡± ¡°Oh. I see.¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°He wanted you to feel better about that, right?¡± ¡°No. He was telling me about Drake¡¯s incestuous behaviour and the monsters he created from it, and¡ª¡± ¡°Okay. First of all¡ª¡± She laughed, holding her index finger up. ¡°Drake was not incestuous.¡± ¡°He wasn¡¯t?¡± ¡°No. He had a child with a woman who was his great granddaughter by blood, but he didn¡¯t know that at the time.¡± ¡°And ¡­ that was that the boy I killed?¡± ¡°No. You killed Simon.¡± ¡°Who was he?¡± ¡°He was vile, but he wasn''t Drake¡¯s creation. Okay, maybe he was, but not his son.¡± ¡°How was he Drake¡¯s creation?¡± ¡°Drake adopted Simon when he was a small boy. He¡¯d been living in the slums of streets infested with disease and plague for months on his own, feeding off rats and all sorts. When Drake found him, he¡¯d been exposed to some horrific situations, including brutal rape by passing travellers.¡± I covered my mouth. ¡°The child was a mess,¡± she continued. ¡°Drake taught him to be a vampire from a young age¡ªtaught him to kill, to transfer his rage onto those who would become his next meal. But, on Simon¡¯s twentieth birthday, when Drake turned him, the heightened vampiric emotions took anything sweet and human we once saw in him and burned it.¡± ¡°So, he created a monster?¡± ¡°Yes, and Drake had grown to love Simon too much to lock him away, but the boy just couldn¡¯t be controlled. That is the only reason he was killed. Drake is not that cruel, and he would not have kidnapped Morgana, if she even existed.¡± ¡°What makes you so sure? And why the sudden change in opinion about Drake?¡± She exhaled through her nose, her jaw stiff, hands tight by her sides. ¡°Well, it¡¯s actually not sudden.¡± ¡°Uh, yes, it is.¡± ¡°No. I¡¯ve just. . .¡± She loosened her fists. ¡°I just keep my opinions to myself if they oppose that of the greater mass.¡± My mouth fell open in disgust. ¡°Don¡¯t judge me.¡± She pointed in my face. ¡°It¡¯s how I¡¯ve survive in a world of vampires that hate my kind.¡± I pushed her hand down. ¡°Fine. But I didn¡¯t realise you were Pro-Drake.¡± ¡°Hey! I so am not.¡± Her tone softened then. ¡°But he¡¯s not as bad as everyone says, either.¡± I folded my arms and leaned on the wall. ¡°That¡¯s what I¡¯m always saying.¡± ¡°I know.¡± She smiled and patted my arm. ¡°But you just haven¡¯t learned yet that sometimes your opinion is the least important part of ruling a nation.¡± ¡°Then what¡¯s the most important, smarty pants?¡± ¡°Playing the game,¡± she said, and folded her arms slowly, adopting my coy grin. ¡°Agree to be agreeable until the masses agree with the opinion you¡¯re keeping to yourself. If you¡¯re right, that eventually becomes evident. You don¡¯t need to kick and scream to make people see your side, Amara. Only time can really do that.¡± ¡°So, you think Drake is agreeable?¡± She leaned on the wall beside me, propping her foot up under her thigh. ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Then, I have to kick and scream, Morg, to make my voice heard here. If we can reason with Drake, then David doesn¡¯t need to go to his death.¡± ¡°So go tell him that.¡± ¡°Who?¡± ¡°Drake.¡± She whipped her phone out of her pocket and held it out to me. ¡°Call him up. Ask him if he wants to negotiate.¡± I laughed, pushing the phone away. ¡°Very funny.¡± She placed it back in her pocket. ¡°David''s going to Elysium to free the prisoners tomorrow, right?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°He¡¯ll be freeing Pepper?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°And he¡¯ll be back next week?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°This time,¡± she said. ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°This time, he¡¯ll be back, but one day he¡¯ll go on the next mission, and he won¡¯t return, Amara.¡± She took a step toward Mike as he appeared down the other end of the hall. ¡°I wasn¡¯t joking about calling Drake. I think you should consider it.¡± ¡°Maybe I¡¯ll think about it,¡± I said. ¡°Good. Then I¡¯ll text you his number.¡± She turned and walked backward for a second, her arms folded. ¡°Because I don¡¯t want David to die either.¡± I watched her walk away, wondering which part of her recommended the call to Drake: the betraying traitor we suspected she was a few weeks ago, or a true friend who wanted to help me stay on the throne. Either way, we shared one common belief: killing Drake was not the best option, even if he wanted to insert an evil witch¡¯s black soul into my not-yet-conceived child. Page 29 Midday sun streamed down through the glass dome above me, casting coloured light across my forearm and David¡¯s chest. I frayed the tips of my fingers through the reds and blues, turning my hand to angle the colours into my palm. The world could just feel so simple at times, but not more than it did when I was in David¡¯s arms this way. Somewhere outside, though, down the long, winding road leading to the manor, a car was edging closer, all fuelled up and ready to take my husband away for the week, turning this precious moment into one of our last.Advertisement I traced a circle around the hollow between David¡¯s collarbones, feeling for a pulse I knew I¡¯d never find. I¡¯d hoped that one day Jason and I would figure out the key to reversing vampirism and that maybe I¡¯d know what it was like to hear David¡¯s heart beat under my ear, but the truth of that wish occurred to me only then: even if those power were still possible, David would be long dead before I figured them out. My heart sunk, its roots reaching out for something to hold onto inside me. But without hope to find them, they were left floating around like unbound tendrils, lost. I did feel some relief, though, finally knowing the truth about all this prophecy stuff, and it was much easier being around David with no secrets between us. I could breathe for once, and just exist with him; no longer afraid he¡¯d read my thoughts and find out I knew more than he wanted me to. However, I did still wonder how he learned about his bloodline being cleansed. If Arthur knew, was it something David had always known, too, and was it even true that he and Lilith were meant for each other, or was it just another unfounded theory? ¡°How do you feel about the prophecy now?¡± he asked. ¡°I . . . good, I guess.¡± I nodded. ¡°I mean, it¡¯s tricky, because I nearly slipped up and said something to Margret and Walt the other day.¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°What¡¯s what?¡± ¡°What did you nearly say?¡± ¡°Oh, I nearly said that it was a relief not be tangled up in some prophecy I didn¡¯t want a part of.¡± David laughed. ¡°I corrected myself, though,¡± I added. ¡°And said I was relieved that we were finally seeing to the prisoners at Elysium.¡± I grinned. ¡°But I accidentally called it La Chateau de la Mort.¡± He laughed again, propping his arm behind his head. ¡°Was Arthur around?¡± ¡°No. Thank God.¡± ¡°Speaking of Arthur.¡± He lifted my top a little, rolling up to look down. ¡°That rash you woke up with after you fell from the lighthouse is still there.¡± ¡°I know.¡± I cupped his hand, stopping him from touching it. ¡°Is it sore?¡± ¡°No. Just itchy. Like I can feel something crawling out through my skin.¡± ¡°Well, I want you to go see my uncle and get something for it. It looks as though it¡¯s turning black.¡± I cringed. ¡°Okay. I¡¯ll go see him once you¡¯re gone this afternoon.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± He drew his arm from under his head and checked his watch, then tucked it back again. ¡°Then call me right away and tell me what he says.¡± ¡°Won¡¯t you be out of service at Elysium?¡± ¡°Only in the tunnels.¡± ¡°You mean dungeons.¡± ¡°Yes.¡± He nuzzled my head for a second. ¡°Dungeons.¡± ¡°Will . . . when you free. . .¡± I swallowed my heart back down from my throat. ¡°When you free her, will she. . .?¡± ¡°Ara, Pepper and I are done.¡± ¡°But she doesn¡¯t know that. She doesn¡¯t know you dumped her and fell in love with¡ª¡± ¡°Ara, enough.¡± He slid out from under me and hooked his legs over the side of the bed. ¡°This is hard enough as it is, without you adding your concerns.¡± ¡°David, I¡¯m sorry. I¡ª¡± He stood up as. ¡°Pepper is a part of my past. Were it not for the fact that she is one of the prisoners granted pardon, I¡¯d not have any contact with her.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°She broke the law.¡± ¡°So she¡¯s nothing to you now?¡± He turned away. ¡°It¡¯s just how I feel.¡± ¡°Harsh.¡± I crawled across the bed and hopped out, coming to stand next to David. ¡°Would you hate me if I did something illegal?¡± ¡°Just . . . don¡¯t.¡± I half laughed. ¡°Why are you so serious when it comes to the law?¡± ¡°It¡¯s just the way I am, Ara.¡± He walked to the blanket box and zipped up the duffel bag there. ¡°It¡¯s the way I¡¯ve always been. You know that.¡± ¡°I know.¡± I stopped behind him, searching the set of his shoulders for an answer I wasn¡¯t sure I wanted. ¡°David?¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°You¡ª¡± Carefully and cautiously, I reached across and touched his back. ¡°You are only going to Elysium, right?¡± ¡°Why do you ask?¡± ¡°Just . . . you¡¯re not sneaking off to kill Drake, are you?¡± He turned with a smile and reached up to tuck a lock of hair behind my ear. ¡°I will return to you this time, mon amour. You have my word.¡± Chapter Six No one could imagine from looking up at the beige wall around the Garden of Lilith that a menagerie of life thrived behind it. Yellow beams of summer light reached down through the pink leaves of oddly shaped trees, turning the shrubs along the path purple, like a canvas of endless colours to distract my lonely thoughts. I balanced my toes over the cobblestones, avoiding the cool, slippery moss growing between each one, and made my way slowly to the water fountain at the centre of the garden. Tiny dots of water rose from the stone statue to catch a ride on the breeze, greeting my cheeks with cool kisses before sweeping out of the garden and far away. I wiped my face with the back of my wrist and took a seat on the grey ledge, laying my book down beside me. There was something magical and peaceful about this place but, for some reason, despite no one being allowed here without invitation from the queen, I never really felt alone¡ªnever really felt like this was my garden. Beside me, a small splash caught my attention. I dipped my fingers into the pond, sending a school of orange fish scattering under lily pads, making them ripple as if they were breathing. But I didn¡¯t care if the fish ran away. I didn¡¯t even what their company today. I just didn¡¯t really want to see anyone. Didn¡¯t want anyone else to ask me how I was feeling now that David was gone, then look away, disinterested, when I said I felt like crying. The only answer anyone wanted was, ¡°I¡¯m doing well.¡± I got so sick of saying it; so sick of everyone ignoring the lie they heard in my tone, that ¡®alone¡¯ had become the only place I could stand to be. I¡¯d come out here to the Garden in search of the gentle breeze that moved the leaves in a summer song, harmonised with the deep hum of frogs croaking. But as my thoughts stopped for a second so I could listen to that peaceful sound, my ears pricked. I heard nothing. No insects scuffling about. No frogs calling for a mate. No birds chattering and bickering over worms. And my skin crawled with the very distinct feeling that I was being watched. I stood slowly and turned around, searching every shadow or flicker of movement. ¡°Eve? Is that you?¡± ¡°Ara?¡± A tall silhouette appeared in the glare of sunlight. I shielded my face, turning to run when it grabbed my arm. ¡°Ara. Ara,¡± he said more gently, pulling me in, wrapping his arms all the way around my head and shoulders. I pushed out from the firmness of his chest, catching the scent of orange chocolate. And all the fight in me stopped, my lips falling softly part, hands to my sides as I took two slow steps backward. ¡°I¡¯m dreaming,¡± I stated. He smiled down at me, his green eyes warmer than they¡¯d been since I couldn¡¯t remember when. ¡°No, my love. You¡¯re not.¡± And that was it. My lip quivered, my chest went tight, and a full-scale melt down started off for the finish line. ¡°What are you doing back?¡± I wailed. ¡°You¡¯ve only been gone for one night.¡± He cupped a hand to the back of my neck and drew me to him again. ¡°I got all the way out to Elysium, unpacked my bags in my old room and, when Quaid brought me the prisoner manifest, I suddenly realised I didn¡¯t care.¡± My face rolled up to look at him. ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°I mean. . .¡± He sighed impatiently, but not like he was irritated with me, more himself. ¡°Why would I be hundreds of miles across the country, releasing vampires I don¡¯t believe deserve it, when I have such little time left in the one place in this world I actually want to be?¡± I brushed my hair from my cheeks. ¡°With . . . do you mean here? Being king?¡± ¡°No.¡± He laughed, scooping the last strand of hair away from my lip. ¡°Silly girl. With you.¡± My mouth opened but nothing came out. ¡°I know,¡± he said, dropping his hands from my face to take a seat on the fountain¡¯s ledge. ¡°The fact that you¡¯re surprised by that breaks my heart, Ara, and proves to me that the man I thought I was is not the king that stands, well, sits before you now.¡± I sat down next to him, watching our shadows on the ground blend and meet as one. ¡°You have been a bit. . .¡± ¡°Mean,¡± he said in short. ¡°I¡¯ve been a king but not a husband. A lawyer and judge, but not a man.¡± ¡°David,¡± I said softly, sweeping his hand into mine, and he actually turned in his seat so he could look at me. ¡°I understand, you know. I get it. I do. You¡¯ve not only had to deal with the painful burden of going to your death, but you¡¯re also coming to terms with the fact that you¡¯ll be leaving me alone. Which is hard for you, I know, because I also know you don¡¯t want me to be sad, but you¡¯re duty bound to do it anyway.¡± His eyes drifted to our locked hands, a gentle smile holding back the pain I could see in them. ¡°You know me well. But it doesn¡¯t excuse¡ª¡± ¡°No, but I know something else about you, David, and I¡¯m not sure even you¡¯ve realised this is a factor in your moods.¡± I exhaled through my nose, trying to word what was buzzing around in my brain. ¡°Royalty is important to you. And you¡¯re a good king. But you¡¯ll only be king for a short time. I know you want to make sure that, in your short reign, people remember you as one of the great ones. I understand that about you.¡± I patted his hand. ¡°I understand that you¡¯ve been battling with these two parts of yourself, and it¡¯s hard to be a good king and a kind husband. I couldn¡¯t do half the things you do, David, and I respect you for that. And I know, at the end of the day, you still love me as much as the moment you met me. So I¡¯m okay with your nasty side from time to time. And if you weren''t going to die in a few months, I know that, eventually, you¡¯d have found a balance between being a king and a loving husband, but we don¡¯t have that time.¡± I cupped his hand and squeezed it until he looked at me. ¡°So, I understand, and I don¡¯t want you to feel guilty about anything.¡± Page 30 The muscles in his jaw tightened, but as he opened his mouth to speak, he let the control slip for a second and I saw his chin quiver, saw the coating of tears in his eyes, so thick they hadn¡¯t spilled.Advertisement ¡°Aw, David.¡± I reached up and swiped under his lashes, releasing them. ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± He tucked me into his chest, his tears falling against my hair. But I didn¡¯t mind. ¡°My love. I¡ª¡± His body shook for a second. ¡°I don¡¯t want to leave you. I love you more than I thought it was possible to love a person. And I know the pain you suffer right now. I know you¡¯ve kept that pain from me to save my heart from aching, but I¡ª¡± He swallowed hard, sniffing back the liquid. ¡°How am I gonna leave you? I . . . If it would take surgery to cut you out of my heart, what must that mean for the way you love me?¡± ¡°David, I¡ª¡± ¡°I hurt you. I . . . All I¡¯ve done is yell at you, undermine you, overrule you and dominate you. I¡¯ve no right to treat you that way, and I¡¯m,¡± he paused and kissed my head, ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± I snuggled into his chest again, wrapping both arms all the way around his slightly bony ribs. ¡°I forgive you, David. Like I said, I understand why you¡¯ve been that way. I mean, you haven¡¯t really been my David, which means you¡¯re clearly under a lot of stress. It would be unnatural not to be.¡± He laughed a little, cupping the back of my head again. ¡°And this is why I snuck away for a bit. I can free the prisoners in a few days. But, right now, I just want more time with you.¡± I hugged him tighter. ¡°Me too, David. I . . . we only have a month until you go to kill Drake, and¡ª¡± ¡°I¡¯m rethinking that timeframe, Ara,¡± he cut in. ¡°What?¡± I sat back to look up at him. ¡°We need more time.¡± He touched my face. ¡°We haven¡¯t even conceived yet, and that aside . . . I¡¯ve avoided being around you,¡± he said. ¡°To be honest, my love, I¡¯ve tried my hardest not to even look at you, touch you¡ªanything that would make it hurt more the day I have to leave you.¡± ¡°David, that¡ª¡± ¡°I know. It¡¯s mean and stupid. I . . .¡± He wiped a hand down his face, drying the tears away. ¡°I wasn''t aware I was doing it. It wasn''t until I got on the road, played a few CDs¡ª¡± He looked down at me then, his eyes changing. ¡°Do you know how long it¡¯s been since I¡¯ve listened to music?¡± ¡°No.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not sure I have since before our wedding.¡± I pouted kind of mockingly. ¡°And as soon as I let my mind go for a second and just hear the notes, the music, my heart broke. I went back through all the horrible things I¡¯ve done or said these last few weeks, and I told myself to shut up, that you understood. Repeated this to myself all the way to Elysium, but it didn¡¯t matter. My heart wasn¡¯t listening to my brain, Ara, and I just had to come back.¡± He brushed his curled fingers down the side of my face. ¡°I couldn¡¯t leave for a week without making sure you knew exactly how much you mean to me.¡± The birds and frogs had started singing again all around us, almost too noisy, like they were happy to see David again, but they were the only sounds. I just didn¡¯t know what to say, and at the same time, his words didn¡¯t surprise me. What surprised me was seeing the boy I fell in love with sitting right here in my garden, when I never thought he¡¯d surface again. ¡°I thought royalty had killed this David, like maybe the coronation had changed you.¡± ¡°It did, sweetheart.¡± He tucked my hair behind my ear. ¡°It changed me in the wrong ways. And I will still be a firm king, but not at the cost of your heart.¡± I cupped his hand and held it to my face. ¡°Good. Because you are one of the great kings, David. And I don¡¯t want anything about that to change.¡± ¡°Nothing, huh?¡± His tone rose up a few octaves. ¡°Nothing. I feel safer with you on the throne. And I know I can rule my people well when you¡¯re gone, but. . .¡± I smiled up at him. ¡°You¡¯re leaving me with a pretty good example to follow.¡± His broken, sad face cracked, and he smiled then. ¡°You don¡¯t know how happy I am to hear you say that.¡± ¡°I dunno,¡± I said, hugging him again. ¡°I think your smile pretty much says it all.¡± He laughed into my hair, wrapping his other arm around my ribs and linking them together there, holding me tight in this secret garden where nobody else was permitted to go. Not even the king. When the sun rose, I opened my eyes and lay dreading the day. That is until I smelled the sweet scent of citrus and cologne beside me. Each spicy breath filled me with renewed hope while every word we spoke in my garden yesterday echoed in my thoughts, elevating that hope to real possibility. David had not only said he was rethinking the time frame for his death, but had also gone and given the dagger back to Arthur for safekeeping. He didn¡¯t tell me this, of course, but my reliable uncle-in-law had. And that made me suddenly eager to begin my day¡ªanother day I was blessed to have David beside me. ¡°What are you doing?¡± He grabbed my hand as I flopped my legs over the side of the bed. ¡°It¡¯s breakfast time,¡± I said simply. ¡°We have to get dressed.¡± He tugged my wrist, and I tumbled back down into the spoon. ¡°Forget breakfast. We can be monarchs tomorrow.¡± ¡°I thought we had to appear at all social gatherings, that our presence was a show of strength and governance?¡± He snuggled his nose into the curve of my neck, wrapping both arms all the way around my waist. ¡°You¡¯re absolutely right. And you¡¯ll have centuries to prove that after I¡¯m gone.¡± I relaxed a little, stopped trying to get up, and just lay there all snug and cosy in his arms. ¡°I like this version of you much better.¡± ¡°Good. Enjoy it now then, because this me has to go back to his kingly duties this afternoon.¡± ¡°Why?¡± I rolled over so I faced him. ¡°There¡¯s a new case coming in to Court today.¡± ¡°And you don¡¯t think I can handle it?¡± He ran the tip of his nose down mine. ¡°It¡¯s not that, sweetheart. It¡¯s that I don¡¯t want you to handle it.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because it¡¯s a member from Eric¡¯s band.¡± ¡°What?¡± I sat up. ¡°Hey.¡± David looked at the empty hollow of his arms, then at my face, then at his arms again. I lay back down, and the hold he had before tightened. ¡°What did he do?¡± ¡°He revealed his vampirism to a human girl, and Eric was forced to kill her.¡± I bit my lip. ¡°Is Eric in trouble for that? Will he be brought before us t¡ª¡± ¡°No.¡± ¡°Then why can¡¯t I sentence his friend? I would¡¯ve been the one to do it if you weren''t here.¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± The cool breath he huffed moved my hair. ¡°Okay.¡± ¡°Okay, what?¡± ¡°Okay. You¡¯re right. I can¡¯t rush in and play daddy all the time,¡± he reasoned, more with himself than me. ¡°You¡¯re a big girl. If you want to handle this on your own, that¡¯s fine with me.¡± I leaned back a little to see if he was being sarcastic, but the corner of his lip angled up on one side with a sweet smile, and he closed his eyes again, taking a deeper breath of my scent. ¡°You¡¯re not kidding, are you?¡± I asked, just to confirm. ¡°About what?¡± ¡°About letting me handle it.¡± ¡°Did you think I was?¡± ¡°Uh, yeah.¡± I laughed. He slid both hands along the sides of my face and planted a very soft, very sweetly-David kiss to my lips. ¡°It¡¯s not easy for me to sit back and watch you be independent.¡± ¡°What? I¡¯ve always been independent.¡± ¡°Not really, sweetheart. I mean, when we met, you needed me. You . . . you needed me to care for you, guide you. Love you. And I guess I got used to that. It became a habit to baby you¡ª¡± ¡°Like Mike did.¡± I smiled. ¡°Yeah. I can see how that relationship evolved that way.¡± ¡°How so?¡± ¡°It¡¯s because you back down. If I put my foot down about something, you very rarely challenge me anymore. You never even question me, and sometimes I just don¡¯t realise I¡¯m being a. . .¡± ¡°Moron?¡± ¡°No. A controlling asshole.¡± I sucked back the burst of laughter, accidentally spitting it out in David¡¯s face. He wiped away the dots of my hilarity and skidded closer, wrapping his ankle around mine, our bare skin touching in every way possible. ¡°I don¡¯t want to be that guy with you, Ara. I don¡¯t want to hurt you like that, and I do, you know I do, want you to be this wonderful, independent, smart, switched-on girl you are. I think I just suck at being a husband.¡± ¡°You don¡¯t suck, David.¡± I touched his face softly. ¡°I love you, okay. And the fact that you¡¯re willing to acknowledge your own bad behaviour shows me that you¡¯re a better husband than I could have hoped for.¡± He kissed my lips again. ¡°That means a lot to me.¡± I cuddled in to him again. ¡°Let¡¯s just start fresh, okay. I mean, neither of us has had a chance to be the other¡¯s spouse because this is the first time we¡¯ve really been together since we were married. Think about it,¡± I reasoned, ¡°we had torture, possible eternal separation, followed by months apart, learning to rule a monarchy and, now, we have your imminent death on the horizon, and all of this is before we¡¯ve even had our first anniversary.¡± He laughed once, completely wrapped up in what I was saying. ¡°I¡¯d say,¡± I continued, ¡°the fact that we still love each other, that we can forgive each other¡¯s downfalls and mistakes, means that we¡¯re doing pretty well as a first-year married couple.¡± The bend of his arm wrapped the back of my head, and he pulled me in under his jaw, holding me so tight I held my breath. ¡°There¡¯s that wisdom I saw in you all those years ago.¡± ¡°All those years ago, huh?¡± I raised a brow, even though he couldn''t see it. ¡°How old have we become in the last two years?¡± ¡°Speaking for myself,¡± he said with a chuckle. ¡°I¡¯ve aged rather rapidly since I met you.¡± ¡°Hmpf.¡± He laughed. ¡°But what I meant was that you¡¯ve always been very wise, that I knew it from the first moment I heard your thoughts.¡± ¡°Except the deeper wisdom never surfaced, is that what you¡¯re saying?¡± ¡°No. I just think sometimes you see the answer as being too simple, and you ignore your mind¡¯s first response to things and bypass it, getting completely muddled up in the process of it all. But as you¡¯re getting older, I¡¯m seeing you use that wisdom more and more, and it makes me worry a little less about leaving you.¡± Page 31 I quietly thought about that for a second, seeing how I could easily have taken insult to it but knowing he meant it as a compliment. ¡°I¡¯ll be okay, you know, even when you¡¯re gone, David. I still have Arthur. I know he¡¯ll stay here and help me out as much he can.¡±Advertisement He nodded against the top of my head. ¡°I know. I¡¯ve actually spoken to him about it.¡± ¡°About what?¡± ¡°About caring for you when I¡¯m. . .¡± He kissed my hair, squeezing me. ¡°I know you¡¯ll be in good hands.¡± I nodded. ¡°And I¡¯ve already picked out my cat.¡± ¡°Is that so?¡± He laughed. ¡°And what kind of cat is it?¡± ¡°Skittles.¡± ¡°Skittles?¡± He leaned back to look down at me. ¡°Yeah. I¡¯m gonna ask Mom and Dad if I can have him.¡± He closed us into his hug again. ¡°I¡¯m sure they¡¯ll give you anything you want.¡± I smiled, imagining Skittles sitting on the foot of my bed. David would be gone, but it¡¯d be nice to have a little piece of home here with me. As long as I kept Petey out of here. ¡°Petey will eat that cat as soon as he sees it,¡± David said. ¡°Were you just reading my mind?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± I shook my head, finding only amusement beneath the irritation. Everything in my world just seemed to be back to normal again, even if it was only for five more minutes. It was a blissful five minutes at least. ¡°I love you, David.¡± ¡°For forever?¡± ¡°For forever.¡± The court noisily praised my last ruling as the defendant backed away and blended with the crowd again. Today¡¯s cases had mostly been fun ones, but I knew the next would be hard¡ªto see Eric for the first time in so long and then sentence his friend to some horrific punishment. A tall figure appeared on the balcony at the back of the room, leaning on the railing as if he was some bystander, a king pretending to be a commoner. I threw a gentle smile his way and looked back down at the accused: a young man with jet-black hair to his ears, piercings in every inch of flesh available, and tattoos like sleeves down his arms that were clearly there before he was turned. It seemed that some mistakes we made in life really did scar us for eternity. I was very glad then that I never snuck out to get that tattoo my friends all had done to mark our clique as one for forever. I cringed just thinking about the possible and eternal ramifications of that mistake. Walter took centre stage to present Adrian Fernandez, a.k.a. Lice, and informed the court and all its attendants of this man¡¯s indiscretions. I listened as Lice pleaded for mercy, falling to his knees at the base of the stairs, but his cries did nothing to melt my heart. ¡°You broke the law, Adrian,¡± I said. ¡°The lead singer of your band is a good friend of mine, but that affords you no exclusions to the rules everyone else has to follow.¡± ¡°Please.¡± He shook his clasped hands in the air. ¡°I won¡¯t do it again.¡± ¡°You shouldn¡¯t have done it in the first place.¡± I looked up at the balcony for a second; David was still there. ¡°If you loved this girl, planned to be with her, I might have understood, but you told her what you are in order to receive attention and praise.¡± ¡°Erm.¡± Walter cleared his throat. ¡°Fellatio.¡± I looked at Walter; he was trying not to laugh. ¡°Pardon?¡± He cleared his throat again and mumbled, ¡°He did it to receive, er . . . fellatio.¡± ¡°Right. Um. . .¡± I looked at the court again. ¡°Fellatio.¡± David coughed into his hand, folding over and turning away quickly to hide his laughter. ¡°And that girl is now dead because of your ego,¡± I continued, feeling my cheeks go hot like a stone in the sun. ¡°In this Order, we value all life: human, vampire, and Lilithian alike. There are no exceptions.¡± ¡°It was a mistake, Majesty, I¡ª¡± ¡°A mistake you won¡¯t make again.¡± I stood up, straightening my crown. ¡°I make my official ruling, and while it pains me to do this¡ªleaving Eric without a drummer, leaving the world without your musical talents¡ªit is also not my doing. You broke our law, knowing the consequences. I hereby sentence you to a week in the crypt¡ª¡± The crowd gasped. Adrian¡¯s hands fell to the floor to hold him up. ¡°You may have a dose of blood before you¡¯re entombed, given that this is your first offence, but you will have no other comforts.¡± ¡°Please?¡± he cried again as my knights lifted him to his feet. I held my hand up, a warning to talk no more. ¡°Please?¡± he cried again, his hollow voice echoing as the Guard dragged him away, one of the men drawing a syringe of Created venom from his sword belt in case Adrian decided to make a scene. He shut up quickly when he saw it, and walked away with his dignity intact. In the front row a pair of black eyes met mine. Eric gave a small nod and moved his mouth to say, ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± I didn¡¯t smile back. It was so very good to see him, but when my feet were planted to this stage, in front of hundreds of people from my community, I had to be their queen¡ªI, essentially, had no friends. I moved my stern gaze away from Eric, all the way across the crowd to Walt¡¯s very surprised face. ¡°Next case, Walter.¡± He cleared his throat. ¡°Uh, yes, Your Majesty. Case number fifty-five. Harrison versus Yeardley.¡± Above the court, David looked down on all the people, nodding toward me once before slinking back into the shadows. But I heard his voice enter my thoughts, distracting me a little from court as he disappeared, Good job, he said. I¡¯m proud of you. I smiled at my feet then turned my focus back to the case report. ¡°Ara.¡± Eric threw his arms around me. I hugged him back fiercely. ¡°It¡¯s so good to see you again. How have you been?¡± ¡°I¡¯m good, yeah.¡± He leaned out from the hug. ¡°Band¡¯s doing well. Just released our first album and, well, I¡¯ll have to tell the public that Lice is in rehab or something for the next seven days but, yeah, we¡¯re all good.¡± ¡°I feel bad for you, Eric. I know Adri¡ªI mean, Lice, is a friend¡ª¡± ¡°No.¡± He stepped back to stuff his hands in his pockets. ¡°Say no more. He knew the rules.¡± I nodded. ¡°And I¡¯m sorry you had to kill that girl.¡± He laughed. ¡°Are you kidding? Ara, I¡¯m a vamp¡ª¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I palmed my head. ¡°Right. I forget you don¡¯t mind a bit of homicide.¡± His easy smile brought me back to my hometown for a moment, flooding me with memories. ¡°S¡¯good to see ya again, kiddo.¡± ¡°You too, Eric. I missed you.¡± He went to speak, but stopped, looking up as David approached. ¡°Hey, man.¡± ¡°Hey.¡± David hugged him, and they both broke into a series of manly back pats. ¡°Long time, man.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± Eric stood back, allowing room for David to stand beside me. ¡°It¡¯s been a good run. How you been?¡± David shrugged. ¡°Been better.¡± ¡°Yeah. Tough break, man. I heard about the Dagger.¡± David nodded, but quickly pasted a smile in place. ¡°You stayin¡¯ for dinner?¡± Eric grinned, looking at me. ¡°Depends what¡¯s on the menu.¡± David laughed, wrapping his elbow over Eric¡¯s neck as we walked out of the Throne Room. ¡°We both know what will happen if you ever taste my wife¡¯s blood.¡± ¡°Worth the risk,¡± Eric said. ¡°On the bright side,¡± I cut in. ¡°It might just be a way to resurrect you from the dead, David.¡± ¡°Hey, kiddo.¡± Eric landed in a lazy heap on the leather sofa next to me, making it squeak with protest, the sound echoing through the library. ¡°Hey, Eric.¡± His cheeky grin spread across his face like a wild party, promising exciting things if only I let myself go with him. ¡°What y¡¯up to?¡± ¡°Reading.¡± I tucked my legs up to one side, leaning more on the arm of the sofa to angle away from him. ¡°And you¡¯re too close for my husband¡¯s liking.¡± His smile grew. I didn¡¯t see it, but I felt it. ¡°He¡¯s not here to protest.¡± I shut my book. Clearly, Eric was out for some fun tonight or, at the very least, some fun company. ¡°Can¡¯t sleep?¡± He shrugged, his shoulders looking kind of bony in that plain back tee. ¡°Haven¡¯t seen ya in ages. Just wanted to catch up without the ¡®fold¡¯ around.¡± ¡°By fold, you mean. . .?¡± ¡°The followers.¡± He made quotation marks in the air with his fingers. ¡°The many who love and protect their queen. Most of all, that power-hungry vampire you call a king.¡± ¡°Hey.¡± I backhanded his arm. ¡°That¡¯s my husband you¡¯re talking about.¡± ¡°Really?¡± He sat back, resting his hands in his lap. ¡°Coulda fooled me.¡± ¡°What¡¯s that supposed to mean?¡± ¡°I mean. . .¡± He leaned on my thigh to push himself up, then wandered across the room to pore aimlessly over book spines. ¡°He¡¯s changed, Ara.¡± ¡°So everyone keeps saying,¡± I said flatly, dumping my book on the end table. ¡°He¡¯s just under a lot of pressure.¡± ¡°So you keep saying.¡± He waited a few seconds, then turned at the shoulder to flash me a grin. ¡°So . . . what you readin¡¯?¡± ¡°Oh, um.¡± I reached across and laid my notepad over the title of the book. ¡°Just researching.¡± ¡°Researching,¡± he said slowly, as if drawing out the word would prompt an explanation from me. ¡°Stuff.¡± ¡°Stuff, huh?¡± His whole body bounced with his casual nod. ¡°Aide-Memoire de l¡¯Auress.¡± ¡°Hey!¡± I stood up and grabbed my book from his sudden thieving paws, shoving his chest after. He took a few steps back, kind of stumbling from the force, and jammed his hands in his pockets, laughing. ¡°Don¡¯t try to hide things from a guy two-times faster than you.¡± ¡°You had no right to do that.¡± I put the book back down on the table he¡¯d stolen it from. ¡°Then don¡¯t lie to me.¡± He stepped back into my circle of fury. ¡°Why are you reading that? What happened here while I was gone?¡± I pressed my hip distractedly. ¡°Nothing.¡± ¡°Nothing?¡± he said, suddenly beside me again, but this time lifting my top. I yanked it back down. ¡°Get off.¡± ¡°What happened to your skin?¡± ¡°Nothing.¡± ¡°That¡¯s not nothing, Ara. Come on.¡± He held both hands out, palms raised. ¡°Talk to me. You know I got your back, kiddo.¡± Page 32 My lip quivered for a second before I drew back the grief and replaced it with fighting strength. ¡°It happened after the lighthouse.¡± ¡°The lighthouse?¡± He followed me to where I sat back on the sofa. ¡°After you fell?¡±Advertisement I nodded. ¡°But Petey says it¡¯s a Mark of Betrayal.¡± ¡°Betrayal?¡± He almost slipped off the seat. ¡°What the hell¡¯d you do, girl?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not sure. I . . . I don¡¯t remember.¡± ¡°Cah!¡± He scoffed, flipping his hair back with one hand. ¡°Convenient.¡± ¡°I really don¡¯t, Eric. I¡¯m not lying.¡± His head turned very slowly until his foggy brown eyes met mine; he searched inside my soul for a moment then looked away. ¡°Do you suspect foul play?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± ¡°Have you told David you think it¡¯s a Mark of . . . Betrayal?¡± ¡°He thinks it¡¯s a rash. He hasn¡¯t seen it since it went dark and took on the shape of letters.¡± ¡°So, you haven¡¯t had sex with him?¡± he asked playfully. I wasn¡¯t sure if I should answer. ¡°Last time we did, the rash wasn¡¯t as bad but . . . after I woke up the next morning, it was searing hot and the symbols had taken on real shape.¡± ¡°So, what, making love to your husband makes the rash worse?¡± he suggested as well as asked. ¡°Maybe you¡¯re allergic to him.¡± ¡°Ha-ha.¡± I reached over and flicked his earlobe. ¡°Funny.¡± He sat back, exhaling rather loudly for the quiet space we were in, then lopped his arm over the back of the sofa and around my shoulders. ¡°Forget reading for tonight. You can investigate memory loss and icky rashes all day tomorrow. But you¡¯ve only got me for one night.¡± ¡°And what do you suggest we do?¡± I sat up and removed his arm from my body. ¡°Jog your memory.¡± His lips angled into that sharp grin I loved. ¡°How will we do that?¡± ¡°Go jump off a lighthouse.¡± I held my awkward smile, not sure if he was kidding or not, shaping it into a frown when he stood up and offered me his hand. ¡°Come on,¡± he said. ¡°Who knows? Maybe if we sit up there and watch the sun rise for a bit, you might remember something.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I took his hand and stood. ¡°But Quaid¡¯s coming with us.¡± ¡°Quaid?¡± He looked over his shoulder. ¡°Why him?¡± ¡°He¡¯s my night guard. I take him everywhere.¡± Eric¡¯s brows shot up to his hairline. ¡°Wow. Things have changed around here.¡± ¡°I¡¯ve missed this place,¡± Eric said, dangling his legs over the platform and into the abyss below. I sat down beside him, hugging the railing with both my arm and my chin. ¡°So, if you miss it so much, why not come back to us?¡± ¡°I can¡¯t. I finally have a life, Ara.¡± ¡°You had a life here.¡± ¡°I had a job here, following you around and offering advice. No offence.¡± He bumped me with his elbow. ¡°I got better things to do with my eternity.¡± ¡°Fair enough,¡± I said, casting my attention then on the yellow glow reaching out to sea from behind us, lighting up my hands and making eerie shadows of the rocks below each time it passed. The fierce wind roared up here, whipped past the metal railing, shaking everything that wasn¡¯t made of iron, while the sea called beneath us¡ªhundreds of meters down where it bashed the rocks in some angry attempt to prove greater might than the land. My hair moved around my face in a wild dance, strapping my eyes every few seconds, leaving them kind of teary with the sting. ¡°I love the way the ocean smells when it¡¯s late at night,¡± Eric said. ¡°Mm.¡± I smiled, watching the dark sky with almost new eyes. ¡°I think the glow of the stars gives it an almost richer, more dreamy flavour.¡± ¡°God, girl. Don¡¯t go all poetic on me.¡± He reached into his pocket. ¡°The king might have cause to worry ¡®bout your intentions.¡± ¡°What, between you and I?¡± I scoffed. ¡°In your dreams.¡± He just smirked, looking out to sea again, tapping a small, silver case about the size of a card deck against his leg. ¡°I sat in on a class today.¡± ¡°Class?¡± ¡°Yeah. Down at the barracks.¡± He flipped the case open and offered me the contents. I declined with a scrunched-up nose. ¡°Mike¡¯s got some pretty good stuff goin¡¯ on down there.¡± ¡°I know. I came to sit in on the ¡®How to Kill a Vampire Without Venom¡¯ and ¡®Putting a Vamp Down in Three-Seconds¡¯ lectures last month.¡± ¡°Blade was giving that one today¡ªto the newbs.¡± He lit a smoke, cupping his hand around it so the flame wouldn¡¯t blow out in the wind, then shook the match and dropped it over the edge. ¡°They¡¯ve got this one move, where they jam a dagger into the back of the neck¡ª¡± He used the two fingers holding the smoke to make a line over the top of his spine, ¡°¡ªslip it between the third and fourth vertebrae or something,¡± he said suggestively. ¡°Yeah, severs the spinal cord and sends them down fast. Takes at least a day to rejuvenate.¡± ¡°Unless you¡¯re Lilithian.¡± ¡°In which case, you die.¡± He drew on his cigarette, puffing the fumes out with ¡°And the guns are new.¡± I laughed, thinking about Mike¡¯s face when he first opened the crates. ¡°The bullets are spiked, you know? Some with Created and some with Pureblood venom.¡± ¡°I know. Mike gave me one¡ªa gun.¡± ¡°Seriously?¡± ¡°Yeah. Just the Created venom, though. Told me to watch out for Drake. Said it was standard issue now¡ªall guards and knights keep one on their sword belts.¡± I nodded. ¡°They all keep a syringe handy, too¡ªjust in case they need to arrest someone that puts up a fight.¡± ¡°I know.¡± He took a puff of that smoke again and blew it out. ¡°They took Lice down with it today.¡± ¡°Did they?¡± ¡°Yeah. Once they got him around the corner, they jammed it in his neck.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry about that.¡± ¡°S¡¯okay.¡± He moved his shoulder up. ¡°He was puttin¡¯ up a bit of a fight.¡± ¡°I would have, too.¡± He laughed then, nodding. ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°So, did Mike show you how to shoot a vampire? ¡®Cause those bullets won¡¯t go through bone.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± He flicked his cigarette bud over the edge and the little flickering orange glow burned its way out of sight. ¡°He said to aim for the eye¡ªthat the bullet bounces off the skull of a vampire and stays inside, just jumpin¡¯ around.¡± He tapped his head. ¡°Mashing up the brain.¡± I nodded. ¡°Yup. Or go for the belly.¡± I made a gun-like motion to my own belly. ¡°Balls work well, too.¡± ¡°Ha! I bet.¡± He leaned forward and stuffed his smoke case in his back pocket. ¡°So, do you get a gun?¡± ¡°Nah. I have a sword, but I don¡¯t walk around with it on me.¡± ¡°Why not? King does.¡± I thought about how sexy David looked with that sword hanging down by his leg, all tall and strong and stern, kinda like an eighteenth-century prince. ¡°I have a dozen or so guards that carry swords. I don¡¯t need it.¡± ¡°Fairs enough.¡± I smiled, resting my chin on the railing. The night seemed to have worn on to morning across the far horizon too quickly, leaving the ocean with an almost red glow as far out as the eye could see. ¡°Sailor¡¯s warning,¡± I said, nodding toward it. ¡°Huh?¡± ¡°The red sky. They say that if it¡¯s red at night, it¡¯s a sailor¡¯s delight¡ª¡± ¡°Right.¡± He nodded. ¡°Red sky in morning, a sailor¡¯s warning.¡± ¡°You¡¯ve heard that one before?¡± ¡°Kiddo, I was in the Navy for a decade.¡± ¡°What Navy?¡± He looked slowly away. ¡°It was a long time ago.¡± ¡°When you were human?¡± ¡°Yeah,¡± he said, his shoulders sinking a little. ¡°Do you miss being human?¡± His lips moved quickly into that coy grin, making his eyes light up. ¡°Not even a little bit.¡± ¡°Good.¡± I wrapped my arm across his waist and gave him a little squeeze. ¡°¡®Cause I like you as a vampire. You¡¯re cocky and kinda sadistic, but there¡¯s no one else like you, Eric.¡± ¡°I¡¯ll take that as a compliment.¡± ¡°It is, silly.¡± I laughed, and he laid his arm over mine, patting my elbow a few times. When I first met him, I always thought music was the way David connected to the deeper, more soulful part inside himself. He never played for show, never paraded himself or his musical talents, and was never arrogant about it. But I never saw in him the emotion I saw in other true musicians when they¡¯d play alone¡ªwhen they thought no one else was around. I could sit at the piano and play for hours, tears streaming down my cheeks, the very soul of the song coming to life because of me. And I¡¯d watched David sit for hours, too¡ªsnuck up and hid behind the door to the Great Hall¡ªwaited for the sad song he was playing to draw some raw emotion from him. But never. Not once. He played, but he never let go. I stood by the bedroom door, my arms folded, and watched him where he sat on the bed with his guitar across his lap, his thoughts somewhere out there on the day over the balcony ledge. He played a sad song, sitting slightly more hunched than he usually did, and sang the words as if he was compelled to, yet wasn¡¯t really performing either¡ªhe was just singing for himself. And this¡ªthe curve of his spine, the angle of his chin against the grasp of the world, and the very absence of that smile in his eyes¡ªwas his tell. This was his raw emotion shining through. He would never bleed tears into an empty room. He would never let emotion come up on its own and steal his composure, but his body couldn¡¯t pretend he felt no pain in his heart. I walked over and sat behind him on the bed, wrapping one hand under his arm and turning it to cup his shoulder, laying my cheek on the other. ¡°Everything okay?¡± He received my affection with what sounded like a breath of relief, gently resting his jaw against my eyebrow. ¡°It is now.¡± ¡°Good,¡± I whispered back, smiling into his shoulder blade. ¡°What you doing?¡± ¡°Just watching you sing.¡± He glanced back at the open door and sighed, shaking his head as he turned his gaze on the day again. ¡°I thought I shut that.¡± ¡°You did. I opened it.¡± He nodded to himself. ¡°Hey, David?¡± ¡°Yes, my love.¡± ¡°I¡¯m worried.¡± Page 33 ¡°About what?¡±Advertisement ¡°About. . .¡± I sat up on my knees and massaged his shoulders. ¡°There¡¯s something . . . wrong.¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°It¡¯s this lighthouse thing.¡± ¡°What about it, my love.¡± He laid the guitar down on the bed and turned when I didn¡¯t answer, taking my hand off his shoulder to hold it. ¡°I can see how upset you are by this. What is it?¡± ¡°It¡¯s . . . I get this feeling.¡± ¡°Feeling?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I nodded, not really sure how to explain it. ¡°Like I¡¯m forgetting something.¡± He laughed and hooked his arm behind my back, pulling me around and into his lap. ¡°You are, my love. You have amnesia.¡± ¡°But, I . . . I have a really bad feeling about it.¡± ¡°Of course you do,¡± he said simply. ¡°You¡¯re missing a part of your life, a section of events that happened, resulting in extreme pain and near death, and your mind is trying to make sense of it. It¡¯s your instinct to survive, to find a reason something occurred and prevent it happening again.¡± My shoulders relaxed. ¡°You think?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± He lifted my hand from the buttons I was toying with and kissed it. ¡°I¡¯m sure of it.¡± ¡°But, I feel like something bad happened.¡± ¡°It did.¡± He laughed. ¡°You fell off a lighthouse.¡± I laughed, too, patting his chest before resting my face in the curve of his neck, his stubble prickling my eyebrow. ¡°You¡¯re right. I guess I¡¯m just not used to the sensation of losing my memory.¡± ¡°You mean mind,¡± he joked. ¡°Be nice.¡± I gave him a soft slap on the thigh. ¡°Besides, it¡¯s not just me who lost their mind.¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°Mike did, too.¡± ¡°Ara, what. Do. You. Mean?¡± he said each word more firmly, but with a hint of a smile in his tone. ¡°I mean. . .¡± I sat up to look into his eyes. ¡°Mike had a memory lapse that night, too. He said he¡¯d planned to take a new box of cuffs down to the training hall, but when he went to get them from the mailroom, they were gone. They¡¯d already been put in the hall. He asked around, and no one else had done it, but he had no memory of it.¡± ¡°And you think this has something to do with your loss of memory?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°And . . . what could that possibly be?¡± I shrugged. ¡°Stop worrying about it, Ara.¡± He kissed my head and rubbed my back. ¡°I¡¯ve looked into it, and I can¡¯t see any evidence of foul play, okay?¡± ¡°Did you talk to Jason¡ªabout the accusations that he erased my memory?¡± ¡°Briefly.¡± He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. ¡°And?¡± ¡°And he said he had a few theories¡ªthat he would fill me in when I got back from Elysium this week.¡± ¡°And you¡¯re okay with that?¡± ¡°Why wouldn¡¯t I be?¡± ¡°Well, he knows something, right? So¡ª¡± ¡°Ara, he doesn¡¯t know anything of value. He has theories. I asked him, I probed to see if he might have erased yours or Mike¡¯s minds, but he didn¡¯t give any indication. And he¡¯s a terrible liar. If he¡¯d done anything to you or to Mike, it would¡¯ve come out in my interrogation.¡± ¡°Interrogation?¡± ¡°A brotherly interrogation,¡± he said softly, running his hand down my arm. ¡°Stop worrying. I really don¡¯t think anything bad happened between you and Mike that night. He¡¯s always taken good care of you.¡± ¡°I know. It¡¯s not like I think he pushed me. I¡ª¡± ¡°Really?¡± he said, curious. ¡°Because that was my first thought just now, when you said he had no memory.¡± ¡°Really?¡± ¡°Yeah. But it¡¯s unlikely his lapse in memory is connected to yours. He was under a lot of stress back then. And as for you? Well, you hit your head pretty hard, Ara. I think you¡¯re just worrying too much.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I snuggled back into his neck. ¡°Maybe.¡± The ocean cooled the grounds around Loslilian, sending its sweeping, stormy breeze low across the lands. The last two days, with David being home and, essentially, on holiday, the summer had been warm and the days longer and brighter. But I woke this morning to the sound of thunder and a great, raging storm going on in my heart as well as outside. We stood on the steps at the front of the manor, a taxi waiting by the fountain, the tears of farewell restrained by formalities, trying to let each other go. I focused on the softness of David¡¯s fingers in mine, running my thumb down his nail. ¡°Try to enjoy yourself at Elysium,¡± I said. ¡°At least a little bit.¡± He smiled, but it didn¡¯t reach his eyes. ¡°I¡¯m releasing prisoners I sentenced¡ªsome I locked away, never to be seen again, all because my queen has a too kind a heart. I¡¯m not sure I¡¯ll enjoy this, Ara.¡± ¡°M¡¯yes, but you¡¯ll be a good boy and do it anyway, won¡¯t you?¡± He bowed mockingly. ¡°Yes, My Queen.¡± ¡°Good.¡± I reached up and patted his head. ¡°Now, run along like a good little king, and set your people free.¡± He gave a breathy laugh as he turned on his heel, saving the last kiss for a journey across the wind from his lips, to his palm, to me catching and storing it in my pocket. ¡°Be safe, David.¡± ¡°Be strong, Ara.¡± I bowed my head once. ¡°I will.¡± ¡°Catch ya later, kiddo.¡± Eric stepped up and hugged me. I breathed him in deep, committing all of him to memory. ¡°I¡¯m sure I¡¯ll see you again.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sure you will.¡± He winked at me. ¡°I¡¯ll have to come back in twenty years and check out this hot daughter you¡¯ll have.¡± I slapped his arm softly. ¡°Good thing I know you¡¯re kidding, or I might be tempted to neuter you.¡± He laughed loudly, his fangs showing under that cocky, carefree smile. ¡°Good thing you think the best of me and actually thought I was joking.¡± ¡°Get outta here,¡± I said playfully, shoving him. He backed away and stood beside David, copping a light punch in the arm. ¡°Later, Ara.¡± Quaid elbowed me as he passed. ¡°Take care ¡®til I get back, okay?¡± ¡°I¡¯ll be okay.¡± I jerked my head toward Blade. ¡°He follows me when he¡¯s not supposed to.¡± Quaid smiled at his three comrades. ¡°Don¡¯t break the record without me, guys. I¡¯ll be back once I¡¯ve delivered the king.¡± ¡°We¡¯ll keep it on hold ¡®til then,¡± Falcon said, giving that cool nod of his. ¡°Great. Catch ya¡¯s.¡± ¡°Later.¡± Blade waved once, and we turned away as David, Quaid and Eric piled into the car. ¡°What record?¡± I asked Falcon. ¡°Darts.¡± ¡°Oh. You play darts?¡± ¡°Just one of the many ways we fill in time when we¡¯re not stalking you.¡± I held still for a moment, watching Falcon¡¯s face carefully. And there it was: the tiniest hint of a smile. ¡°Did you just make a joke?¡± He started walking inside as the car pulled away down the drive. ¡°Seriously?¡± I probed. ¡°You have a bone of humour in your body?¡± He held the door open for me, and I ducked in under his arm, following Emily. ¡°I¡¯m quite a funny guy when I¡¯m not around you.¡± ¡°I bring out the worst in you, huh?¡± I said. His timid smile made me stop walking for a second. ¡°No, but my job brings out the serious side of me.¡± I nodded. ¡°Well, I don¡¯t know the funny side of you, Falcon, but I know I feel safer with your serious side than I do with any other knight on the Core.¡± ¡°I know.¡± He bristled with pride. ¡°Why do you think I¡¯m in charge of the Guard now?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± Blade slapped Falcon on the shoulder. ¡°This guy should win an award for the size of the steel rod he can cram up his arse.¡± Emily and Blade laughed their way down the corridor and out of sight, and I turned to offer Falcon a sympathetic pout. ¡°I¡¯m not here to earn friends,¡± he said. ¡°But they love you anyway.¡± ¡°Yeah. When I¡¯m not walking around with that steel rod wedged where the sun don¡¯t shine.¡± ¡°So, only when you¡¯re off duty then.¡± ¡°Yeah,¡± he said. ¡°Or off doody.¡± ¡°Ha!¡± I covered my mouth. ¡°That was a pretty good one.¡± ¡°Like I said.¡± He closed the front door. ¡°I¡¯m not all business.¡± Chapter Seven ¡°So, we??ve addressed your tantrums¡ª¡± Blade pointed to his thumb, ¡°¡ªyour naivety and, today, I want to talk some more about respect.¡± ¡°Respect?¡± I slid my bottom back on the tabletop and let my legs dangle. ¡°Who am I not respecting?¡± ¡°It¡¯s not your respect for everyone else I have a problem with, Ara. It¡¯s theirs for you.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± I looked down at my knees, tucking my hands under them. ¡°The general population residing within these walls seems to hold you in reasonably high regard. I¡¯ve checked, talked with them about you,¡± he said, pacing the floors again like he was lecturing at a university. ¡°It seems to be only your peers, you know, anyone who knew you before you were queen, that haven¡¯t taken a step back yet to notice this transformation you¡¯ve made.¡± ¡°Like who?¡± ¡°Mike?¡± Emily said, and my eyes moved upward with Blade¡¯s to the girl leaning her arms over the railing on the second floor balcony. ¡°That¡¯s one,¡± Blade said, turning back to me. ¡°Morgaine¡¯s not too bad. King David could use a lesson in the do¡¯s and don¡¯ts of spousal control.¡± I laughed. So did Emily. ¡°He won¡¯t be a problem now, Blade,¡± I said, shifting over, patting the spot next to me for Em to join. ¡°He apologised for that, and it really . . . It¡¯s not who he is. He¡¯s just been having a hard time.¡± Blade bowed his head. ¡°Okay. That¡¯s fine. But the thing is, Ara, it¡¯s not the other people we need to change. It¡¯s you.¡± ¡°We need to change me because they disrespect me?¡± I said flatly. ¡°Yes,¡± Emily added, scooping my hand up in hers. ¡°Because you teach people how to treat you, Ara.¡± Blade¡¯s eyes went wider for a second, a warm smile narrowing them after. ¡°That¡¯s right, Emily, and you could take a leaf out of your own book, couldn¡¯t you?¡± Emily nodded, turning to me. ¡°Ara, Mike babies everyone if they let him.¡± Page 34 ¡°Yeah, and you allow way too much of it, Your Majesty,¡± Blade said. ¡°As a human being, you deserve the respect and confidence of your friends and family but, as a queen, you must command it.¡±Advertisement ¡°Command it?¡± I said. ¡°Yes. It happens one situation at a time,¡± he explained. ¡°You stand tall and clearly warn the culprit to rephrase their statement, this time with a little respect. Do that once or twice, Majesty, and people will catch on that you believe you deserve better than to be spoken to like you¡¯re a seventeen-year-old spoiled brat.¡± ¡°Is that what people think of me?¡± ¡°Not so much anymore. But there¡¯s just a few who haven¡¯t woken up to smell the coffee. And you¡¯ve been so busy being sad over David not being here, followed by news of his impending death, that you haven¡¯t really noticed just how bad your people treat you.¡± I brushed my thumb down Emily¡¯s, focusing only on that so I wouldn¡¯t cry. ¡°I think she has, Blade,¡± Emily said. ¡°She¡¯s not as tough as she looks.¡± Blade¡¯s face appeared under my lowered gaze, his black eyes peering up at me softly. ¡°My Queen, you don¡¯t even realise how much your people actually love you. Those who don¡¯t are in the minority.¡± ¡°It doesn¡¯t feel that way.¡± ¡°I know. But, hey, get this¡ª¡± He grinned at Emily. ¡°Ems and I took a stroll through Lamia Village the other day to see how it was thriving now, and when we got to the great water fountain in Town Square, there was this group of little human girls sitting on the steps.¡± ¡°They were making garlands of blue paper roses to hang around their necks, Ara,¡± Emily said. ¡°And I overheard one of the girls call herself Princess Amara,¡± Blade finished. My heart melted. ¡°Really?¡± ¡°Yeah. Honest to God.¡± Blade tapped his heart. ¡°You and David aren¡¯t just the king and queen, struggling to rule and be in love. You¡¯re figures in history; stories parents tell their children.¡± ¡°That¡¯s pretty cool.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± Blade laughed, standing up again. ¡°So don¡¯t feel so alone, okay, Ara? You¡¯re not. Your people love you, and respect you. But you need to realise that you¡¯re the queen, not a girl fresh out of high school with no relevance or training.¡± ¡°And, Ara,¡± Emily added. ¡°If you think about it, you know more about the laws, systems, and history than almost any of us.¡± My mind wandered to this morning¡¯s lesson with Morgaine on Lilithian and Vampire politics and history¡ªa lesson I, for once, stayed awake for, realising now, more than ever, how important it was that I knew all that stuff. Very soon, there¡¯d be no king to save me from myself. I needed to¡ªhad to¡ªunderstand how to do this on my own or, when David was gone, everything would fall apart. ¡°You¡¯re right, Em,¡± I said, feeling the realisation flood my system like water rising. ¡°I probably know more than anyone here, aside from Arthur and Morgaine. And no one, not Margret, Walt, not even Mike, has the right to speak to me like I¡¯m a child.¡± ¡°Right,¡± Em said, her smile radiating as she looked at Blade. ¡°So, what are you gonna do about it?¡± ¡°Um.¡± I didn¡¯t know. Not really. ¡°I guess, now that I¡¯ve addressed it as an issue, I¡¯ll just have to put myself to the test next time a situation arises.¡± Emily looked at Blade. He shrugged, nodding. He seemed happy enough with that. ¡°I¡¯ll stand back on this one, Majesty. Let you find your own feet,¡± he said. ¡°But if you need any advice, or encouragement, look to me for a quick nod.¡± I gave one in return. ¡°Thanks, Blade.¡± ¡°Any time.¡± He reached back to the table nearby and grabbed a notepad and pen. ¡°Now, I want you taking notes for this part, because you¡¯re going to learn all the loopholes in the laws you can and cannot be overruled on, and those you can be punished for breaking.¡± ¡°Great,¡± I said, and I meant that. Up until now, learning anything made my eyes roll, as if I was back in school, being treated like a kid again. But, in suffering curiosity and belittlement for too long, I¡¯d come to realise just how important it was to be informed. If I knew what I was talking about, no one had cause to argue with me or doubt me. He was small, just a dot on the horizon, almost completely shadowed by the two giant cliffs guarding either side of the small beach, but before I even reached the steep steps leading down to the sand, I knew it was Jase. He crossed his arm over his body and under his elbow, then flicked it out quickly toward the waves, sending a small stone skipping across the choppy surface as best it could considering the almost violent conditions out there today. I could tell, even from up here on the cliff side, that something was troubling him¡ªcould tell he came out here to be alone, but I didn¡¯t really care. I needed some space, too, and my skin had been craving the fury of the ocean for about a week now. We weren¡¯t supposed to be in the same space alone but, if one of us was leaving, I was sorry to say it¡¯d have to be him. ¡°Hey,¡± he called, without even turning around. ¡°How¡¯d you know I was here?¡± I projected my voice over the noise of the wind, even though I knew he could hear me just fine. A habit, I guess. ¡°I can smell you.¡± He turned slightly and smiled at me, then ditched another stone from his handful into the water. ¡°But I was downwind.¡± ¡°Trust me, Ara. My senses are very finely tuned when it comes to you. I could smell you before you even knew you were coming this way.¡± He laughed. I laughed too, closing my shawl around my chest as I stopped beside him. ¡°Hey, did you get that reading you were trying for at training the other day?¡± He shook his head. ¡°And now I need a new ammeter, thanks to your telekinesis.¡± ¡°Telekinesis?¡± I frowned. ¡°What d¡¯you mean?¡± ¡°That¡¯s how you threw him.¡± ¡°I thought it was my light.¡± I waved my fingers. ¡°Your light doesn''t have that kind of power. Maybe to knock someone back with the blast, but not pick them right up and toss them aside.¡± He threw another stone. I reached across and stole one from the cup of his palm. ¡°Show me how.¡± ¡°How what?¡± ¡°Show me how to do it.¡± He looked at the stone in my flat hand, then dropped his collection on the wet sand at his feet, the pebbles scattering like pearly black diamonds. ¡°On one condition.¡± ¡°Anything.¡± I smiled sheepishly. ¡°Well, almost anything.¡± ¡°You keep everything I teach you a secret.¡± He wrapped both hands over my own and the stone. ¡°They all believe your blue light threw that knight, Ara, and it¡¯s probably safer if you keep it that way.¡± I nodded. ¡°Okay, agreed. But what about David?¡± A thin smile stretched his lips. ¡°I¡¯d never ask you to keep something from your husband, Ara. You can tell whoever you like, as long as you trust them.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I looked at my hand all tucked up and warm in his. ¡°I accept the terms of our agreement. Now, show me how to make it move.¡± ¡°Right. Well, you only discovered this because of your survival instinct. Quite often, a vampire¡¯s power can lay dormant for thousands of years, until a situation arises where they need to use it.¡± ¡°So, I could have more powers I don¡¯t know about?¡± ¡°Ara,¡± he said with a small laugh. ¡°I can¡¯t even begin to imagine the potential within you. You¡¯re not only a child of Lilith¡¯s blood, but you¡¯re also deemed a goddess by Mother Nature.¡± ¡°And that means I¡¯m supposed to be magnificently powerful?¡± I asked disbelievingly. ¡°Not just powerful, sweet girl, a force to be reckoned with, something that should scare the wits out of any man who opposes you.¡± I smiled at my own small hand, so feeble against his long, ancient and athletic fingers. ¡°I can just see Drake shaking in his boots now.¡± His hand tightened around mine. ¡°He should be.¡± ¡°He will be, when I figure out how to use this power.¡± I grinned up at Jase¡¯s very slight dimple¡ªthe one he¡¯d get when he was enjoying something. ¡°Now, stop stalling just so you can hold my hand, and show me how to do it.¡± He laughed, but we both knew he wasn¡¯t really stalling. ¡°Okay, as I was saying before, you found the ability because you had the need for it. So, I want you to imagine I¡¯m trying to steal this stone from you, and I want you to use your mind to throw it into the ocean.¡± ¡°Okay. But since we¡¯re role playing, why are you trying to steal it?¡± He thought for a second, looking up when the idea struck him. ¡°Because if I get it, you have to let me kiss you.¡± My spine straightened. ¡°On the lips,¡± he added. I pictured it for a second, and before our lips even touched, an imaginary David came down and ripped Jason¡¯s arms out of their sockets, laid his face down on the boulder by our feet and smashed his heel into the back of Jason¡¯s head, knocking all his teeth out. ¡°Okay.¡± ¡°Give me your word.¡± He held out his pinkie. I linked mine over it. ¡°You have my word. If you get the stone, I¡¯ll kiss you.¡± ¡°He will hurt me when he sees the kiss in your thoughts, Ara. It¡¯s not a joke.¡± ¡°Then you better hope you¡¯re not wrong about me having telekinesis.¡± ¡°Hoping?¡± He took a step back and crouched down, pulling his jeans up his legs a little. ¡°Ara, I¡¯m praying right now.¡± I looked at his white teeth under that smile, and a faint memory of what those lips felt like flooded my senses. ¡°Ara,¡± he said, his tone playful but warning. ¡°You better start moving that stone.¡± I jerked my hand back as he swiped at it, almost catching it in his palm, but my so-called powers didn¡¯t surface. So, I ran¡ªturned on my heel and bolted down the beach, my feet sinking into the softer sand further away from the waves. ¡°You can¡¯t run from me,¡± he called. ¡°And human pace won¡¯t even give you two-seconds¡¯ reprieve.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t run like a vampire when I¡¯m concentrating,¡± I called over my shoulder, half noticing Falcon on top of the lighthouse as I turned back, watching on: the protective knight. I knew there was no way he¡¯d hear us from all the way up there, and a part of me wondered what he thought we were up to, running along the beach like a couple of kids, with me screaming and dodging Jason¡¯s every leap to grab me, and him laughing in such a carefree, boyish way, it almost sounded like he was happy. ¡°Stop concentrating,¡± Jase said, nearly catching the hem of my dress. ¡°The point of adding high stakes is so you¡¯re not thinking about anything but fight or flight.¡± Page 35 ¡°It¡¯s clearly not working.¡± I ducked as he lunged toward me again, then took a quick side step at the cliff wall and darted down the beach in the other direction, leaving Jason face down in the sand, laughing. ¡°You¡¯re enjoying this chase a little too much, I think,¡± I said, stealing a glance to see how far away he was, but my face hit the rock hard centre of his chest instead, and I fell back on my hands, dropping the stone somewhere in the sand.Advertisement ¡°You¡¯re not trying very hard, Ara.¡± He stood above me, his eyes scanning the yellow grains around the circumference of my body. ¡°That¡¯s the sad part.¡± I got up on my hands and knees and sifted through the sand. ¡°I actually am.¡± ¡°If you¡¯re hoping to find it before I do, I wish you luck.¡± His voice was littered with amusement; his arms crossed over his baseball shirt, with the cuffs of his jeans wet and folded up above his bare feet. He was waiting for me to find it, I just knew, and it was either so he could steal it and win his kiss, or to prompt me to use this power he was sure I had. But I just wasn''t that convinced he was even right. ¡°Which is why you ran in the first place,¡± he said smugly. ¡°Shut up, Jason.¡± I felt a stone pass under my fingertips, and moved my hands opposite it to throw him off. ¡°Just because you¡¯re a scientist, doesn¡¯t mean you know everything.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not just a scientist, Ara.¡± He knelt down and dug into the sand right by my heel, standing up again with the stone in hand; I sat back on my thighs, gasping silently. ¡°I¡¯m a century-old vampire who has seen the birth of every scientific and medical advance in the most significant age of science known to man, and I know¡ª¡± He held up the stone, ¡°¡ªexactly what I¡¯m talking about.¡± I stood up, dusting my hands off on my dress. ¡°What do you want, Jason? Is this whole thing really just so you can get a kiss from a married woman?¡± He smirked at the stone between his fingertips, his eyelids thinning into smaller slits until they closed and the stone rose above his palm, floating mid air. ¡°Open your hand.¡± ¡°Why?¡± Emerald green shone out as he looked directly into me. ¡°Open your hand, Ara.¡± I slowly rolled my palm flat, and the stone wandered across the space between us and landed gently there like an invisible man had moved it. ¡°I don¡¯t need to play games to steal a kiss. In fact, I don¡¯t need to steal a kiss, and let me make one more thing clear to you, Ara-Rose. I don¡¯t want to kiss you.¡± I swallowed, closing my fingers over the stone, the cool wind whipping my hair and shawl outward toward the cliffs. ¡°I am here to help you,¡± he continued. ¡°To help my brother, and anything I have ever done in contradiction since I came to this manor was purely in either yours or his best interests. I may love you, Ara¡ª¡± He stepped closer, cupping my tight fist. ¡°But that love only gives me perfect reason to do anything to avoid my lips touching yours, because the repercussions of that kiss would not just affect me, they¡¯d affect David and, in turn, you.¡± The lump in my throat wouldn¡¯t shift. He was right. But he had won that kiss fair and square, except I knew it wouldn¡¯t end on this beach. Falcon would see. I would know it happened and, when David found out, which he would because I¡¯d tell him, Jason would be on stable duty for the next year, if David was in a good mood. I tried not to look at him, but his eyes were locked onto mine, holding me to his gaze, his thoughts centring on the moment our lips would touch¡ªafter so, so long. ¡°You owe me a kiss,¡± he said softly, and his fingers closed around mine, making my skin burn, gradually getting hotter and hotter like water on a stove. ¡°What are you doing to me?¡± ¡°Helping you find your will to fight.¡± He took the last step into me and cupped my chin, rolling my face upward so our lips aligned, leaving just an inch and a warm breath between us. I couldn¡¯t feel the ice on the wind anymore, didn¡¯t care that Falcon was behind us or that the ocean tide had moved in as we stood here, getting dangerously close to our feet. The only thing I felt was the roiling cloud of fear in my gut, swirling and thickening at the taste of his breath, sparking the memory of his smooth lips. I couldn¡¯t do it, though. I knew he was waiting¡ªknew he was respectful enough to make it my choice, on my honour. But I couldn¡¯t keep my word. And it wasn¡¯t because David would tear Jason apart if I did, but that the reason David would do it is because the kiss would hurt him more. ¡°Jase?¡± I lowered my weight back onto my heels, but stayed close to him¡ªchest to chest, hand to hand, faces angled for a kiss, and the heat in my palm seared around the stone. ¡°You¡¯re hurting me.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not doing that,¡± he said smugly, laughing a little as he looked down at my hand. My fingers were bright pink, small clouds of steam billowing up through the cracks between them, while the scent of melting flesh made my nose twitch. ¡°That¡¯s incredible.¡± ¡°Jase, I mean it. It hurts. Stop it.¡± He pulled his hand away, stepping back, but the burning intensified. ¡°Only you can stop it, Ara.¡± I looked down at my hand: the fist was fused shut by melted flesh, my whole arm shaking violently. ¡°Jase,¡± I said, panic rising in my tone. ¡°Please. I don¡¯t know how to make it stop.¡± ¡°Drop the stone.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t.¡± My hand wouldn¡¯t open. ¡°Okay.¡± He took a step closer and the heat raged, as if his skin, his breath, maybe his soul, set the rock in my hand alight. ¡°Ara, fun¡¯s over. Drop it.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t.¡± I cried out, landing on my knees in the sand, digging and scraping at my hand to force it open. ¡°What is this stone?¡± ¡°It¡¯s just a rock.¡± He knelt beside me. ¡°Just a normal rock from the ground.¡± ¡°Why is it so hot?¡± I practically screamed. ¡°Your blue light, sweet girl. You¡¯re on defensive¡ª¡± ¡°Don¡¯t,¡± I yelled as he reached for my hand. ¡°You¡¯ll make it worse.¡± ¡°Just let me¡ªAh!¡± He folded in on himself, his face going bright red. ¡°Ara, stop!¡± ¡°Just get away from me,¡± I said, pretty sure I¡¯d just zapped him without meaning to. ¡°I¡ª¡± He tried to stand, tried to walk away, then sunk to his knees. ¡°Ara, stop!¡± I glanced up quickly to see him curled into a ball a few feet away. But I hadn¡¯t done anything to him. He¡¯d probably just stepped on a jellyfish or something, or maybe he felt the heat, too, as if my electric light had surfaced without colour and hit him hard. But I didn¡¯t care. I needed to concentrate, needed to focus to get this stone out of my hand. I phased Jason, the waves, the wind, the world, out, and imagined that the stone in my hand was just an ice cube, that the heat would melt it. ¡°Focus, Ara. Focus,¡± I mumbled and, all around me, a shimmer of blue light parted the shadows, taking the warmth around the stone and sending it through my entire body, leaving my palm cool and tingly and suddenly free. I unfolded my fingers, rolling my hand to tip the small droplet of water and the pile of sand grains onto the ground by my knee. The melted flesh bubbled and bled, then healed over, leaving the skin smooth and supple again. My lungs expanded, contracting slowly as the long breath I exhaled cooled my limbs. ¡°I melted it,¡± I said to Jason, my eyes filled with wonder, but his deep, almost restless groan snapped my thoughts back to the agonized screams still ringing in my ears. ¡°Oh, my God. Jase!¡± ¡°Ara.¡± He rolled into a tighter ball, cradling his arm in the circle of his body. ¡°Get help.¡± ¡°Jason. Why?¡± I touched his hip to roll him over, but my presence startled him; he raised his wrist to block me, revealing the twisted, awkwardly bent position of his other arm: the wrist had snapped back one way, the forearm broken clean in half, his arm held on only by a thin thread of flesh that refused to give way. My first instinct was to rush in and help, but my body took over, sending my hand to my mouth to cover the scream. Falcon appeared beside me, quickly sizing up the situation, but as he bent down to help the injured, even he drew back in blood-chilling shock. ¡°Vampire¡¯s bones don¡¯t break,¡± he said, grabbing my arm to move me away. ¡°What have you done to him?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± I looked down at my hands, covering my face with them after. ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± ¡°Run, Ara.¡± He pointed up the steep steps. ¡°Get Arthur.¡± ¡°Why is he laying like that?¡± I cried instead. ¡°His arm¡¯s broken.¡± Falcon knelt beside Jason to take a look. ¡°He needs help. Go!¡± Jason groaned, barely able to catch a breath, obviously suffering more agony than he¡¯d ever felt. Despite every ounce of damage I¡¯d ever seen him endure, this was, by far, the worst. ¡°Jase?¡± ¡°Now, Ara!¡± Falcon yelled. I reached out and grabbed Arthur¡¯s arm as he shut the bedroom door. ¡°How is he?¡± ¡°He¡¯s fine.¡± He placed his medical kit on the ground by his feet and let out a breath through his nose, pulling me in for a very needed hug. ¡°He wants to see you.¡± ¡°Did he tell you how it happened?¡± I asked, stepping back. ¡°He did.¡± Arthur nodded, his distant eyes finding a smile a few seconds later. ¡°Telekinesis, huh?¡± ¡°I. . .¡± I looked down at my hands. ¡°I guess so.¡± Arthur just shook his head, bending at the knees to pick up his bag, and walked away, shaking his head as a long whistle left his lips, carrying the sound of amazement down the hall with him. But I wasn¡¯t amazed, or surprised. I¡¯d nearly ripped off the entire arm of a vampire, whose bones were like iron-coated cement. How on earth did I manage to hurt him that way? ¡°Ara?¡± Jason called, a mildly impatient tone coming out through the wooden door with his voice. I pushed it open and poked my head in, showing my teeth in an apologetic grin. ¡°Stop it,¡± he said, reaching his good hand out. ¡°You don¡¯t need to apologise.¡± ¡°Yeah, but. . .¡± I nodded at his arm in its sling, closing the door with my foot. ¡°I also kind of do.¡± He looked down at the broken appendage and just smiled. ¡°Well, one thing I can safely say is, I have never ever felt so much pain, physical pain, in all my vampire life, Ara.¡± ¡°Oh, don¡¯t.¡± I covered my ears. ¡°I already feel bad enough.¡± ¡°Well, I¡¯m sure some people around here would praise you for it.¡± He offered a timid smirk, to which I replied with a pout. ¡°Take a seat,¡± he said and patted the bed. ¡°I want to show you something.¡± I sat down, eyeing the brown leather-bound journal tucked in beside his leg. Page 36 ¡°When I first started developing my powers, the telekinesis was the worst¡ªthe hardest to control or accept.¡±Advertisement ¡°Really?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± He held the book up. ¡°I started taking notes, assessing myself, testing my limits. This¡ª¡± He passed it to me, and as I took hold of it, could actually feel the ancient energy within its pages¡ªcould almost see the past. ¡°I¡¯m sure this will help you on your journey, too, Ara. I want you to have it.¡± ¡°This is your journal?¡± I frayed the pages with my thumb, flipping it open to the first page. ¡°Yes. And it contains many secrets about my powers, so you must promise to keep it safe.¡± I hugged it to my chest. ¡°I promise.¡± ¡°Good.¡± He nodded once and shimmed down a little deeper into his covers, closing his eyes, though he didn¡¯t give the impression he wanted to sleep. ¡°You did good today.¡± ¡°I broke your arm. I hardly think that¡¯s good.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t you?¡± He opened one eye. ¡°Because I think that¡¯s pretty damn amazing.¡± True. It was kind of amazing. A little. If I really thought about it. ¡°Well,¡± I said lightly, standing up. ¡°Next time you¡¯ll think twice about making bets to win a kiss from me.¡± ¡°Your Majesty,¡± he scoffed, laughing, ¡°If that¡¯s the pain I have to go through to kiss you, then, no offence, but I¡¯ve got better things to do with my time.¡± I laughed. ¡°Good. So do I.¡± ¡°Yes, you¡¯ve got a whole lot of reading to do now.¡± ¡°That, I do.¡± I held the book up, laying it on the bed after, my thoughtful gaze falling on its leather binding. ¡°How¡¯s your hand?¡± Jason asked softly. ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± I unfolded my fingers as he took it in his and traced a line down my palm. ¡°I didn¡¯t do it, you know?¡± he said. ¡°Do what?¡± He drew my palm to his lips and kissed it. ¡°I didn¡¯t heat that stone.¡± ¡°I know.¡± I smiled. ¡°I¡¯m sorry I thought you did.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t apologise, Ara.¡± He left my hand in his lap, still holding it. ¡°As soon as the pain stops, I¡¯ll figure out how you did what you did, and then we¡¯ll get started on mastering it.¡± ¡°Without David¡¯s approval, huh?¡± ¡°He has no say in this.¡± His green eyes bore into mine with stern appeal. ¡°You¡¯re showing signs of a power he knows nothing about. Husband or not, he can¡¯t stop me from helping you.¡± ¡°When he finds out what happened, I¡¯m not sure he will.¡± ¡°Well, I hope not. Because you melted that stone, Ara. I was in agony, never hurt so much in all my life, but I still saw you tip the water and sand remains away.¡± I looked down at my hand, reliving that moment. ¡°Do you think that¡¯s another power? Melting things?¡± ¡°No.¡± He closed his eyes and readjusted his head on the pillow. ¡°I think your blue light heated the stone¡ªalmost like a reverse fulgurite.¡± ¡°What¡¯s that?¡± ¡°Ever seen what lightning does to sand?¡± I shook my head. ¡°It strikes the ground at such a high temperature for such a short time that, when it retracts again, the ground cools quickly and the sand turns to glass. I think maybe you heated the stone enough to basically melt it back to sand again.¡± ¡°Whoa. That would have to be pretty hot, right?¡± ¡°As hot as lightning. About three-thousand-two-hundred-and-seventy degrees Fahrenheit to be exact.¡± ¡°But you¡¯re not sure yet if that¡¯s what it was?¡± ¡°Not yet.¡± He winced, scrunching his eyes tight. ¡°But I will figure it out, Ara. I promise you.¡± When I looked up from the journal, his eyes were open again, swearing that promise to me with all his heart. ¡°Okay.¡± I leaned over and planted a kiss to his cheek. ¡°Get some rest, Jase. I¡¯ll see ya later.¡± ¡°Later, Ara,¡± he said, and I closed his door behind me, shaking my head as a smile passed my lips for a moment. I knew I needed to go up and speak to Arthur about all this now. I knew he wouldn¡¯t just walk away, amazed by it all. But I needed to tell someone more important first. ¡°You did what!¡± David¡¯s shock came right through the phone line and made me grin. ¡°I . . . it just broke, David. Like, just snapped in half.¡± ¡°Ara.¡± I heard him sigh. ¡°I took a tour through the Vampiric Institute of Science a few years back¡ªsaw the Brokemon Test.¡± ¡°The what now?¡± ¡°The Bro¡­it¡¯s a demonstration, really, more than a test, where they pit vampire against machine. And these were powerful machines, Ara. They¡¯d lay the vampire¡¯s arm under it and attempt to break the bone. The test was conclusive each time, sweetheart; One hundred per cent conclusive. The machines always failed. Now, I¡¯m not trying to undermine you here, but are you sure it broke?¡± I just laughed to myself a little. ¡°You can talk to Arthur, if you want.¡± ¡°I. . .¡± He went quiet for a second. ¡°Damn, Ara.¡± My smile grew. ¡°That¡¯s amazing.¡± ¡°That¡¯s what everyone says,¡± I chirped. ¡°Everyone? Who else have you told?¡± ¡°Just you. I mean, Arthur and Falcon know, and obviously, Jason, but no one else.¡± David went quiet again. ¡°He¡¯s okay, though, right?¡± ¡°Yeah. He¡¯s healed now. It only took about six hours.¡± ¡°Six hours? Why didn¡¯t you call me the second it happened, Ara? If that much time has passed¡ª¡± ¡°I did. But we haven¡¯t been able to get hold of you. No service in the dungeons, remember?¡± ¡°Right. Sorry. Didn¡¯t think of that.¡± I laughed. ¡°Now you¡¯re just starting to sound like me.¡± ¡°Well, rather than sound like you, can I have your power, please?¡± he said, and I giggled. ¡°That¡¯s not fair. You¡¯re not supposed to be cooler than me.¡± ¡°Well, maybe you¡¯ll get some wicked new talent soon. You¡¯ve only been officially sworn in on the Stone for two weeks.¡± ¡°Very true. I guess I have a whole month worth of a lifetime to find out, right?¡± he said. My shoulders sunk. ¡°It would¡¯ve been nice to see how powerful you became after another century.¡± ¡°Yes. But, perhaps I¡¯ll pass that power down to my daughter.¡± I laid a hand across my belly, thinking about what Eve said. And a part of me wondered if maybe, in some small way, she meant that our child held the key to saving David. ¡°I did that pregnancy test.¡± ¡°And?¡± I heard the smile in his voice. ¡°It was negative.¡± A long moment of silence followed before his deep, whispery voice came down the line, distorted with a bit of static. ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°There¡¯s always next time, right?¡± ¡°Right,¡± he said in an almost quick, insincere manner. ¡°Now, what were you doing, exactly, when you broke my baby brother¡¯s arm?¡± I laughed. ¡°I was running away so I wouldn¡¯t have to kiss him.¡± My ability to silence him surfaced again. ¡°Okay, I¡¯m going to assume there¡¯s quite a story behind that.¡± ¡°There is.¡± I sat down on my bed and crossed my legs. ¡°Remember when I threw that guy at training the other day?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°Jase said it wasn¡¯t my blue light that did it. It was telekinesis.¡± ¡°Telekinesis?¡± ¡°Mm-hm. Apparently I can snap bones with, too.¡± ¡°Okay, just . . . I need a second to get my head around this.¡± I smiled, letting him have his second. ¡°So, you have telekinesis? You didn¡¯t snap his bone with your bare hands, but with . . . your mind?¡± ¡°Yes. Because I thought he was the one that was hurting me.¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°He told me I could move things with my mind, that the power had surfaced the other day out of necessity, and that if we could recreate a situation where I felt threatened, it would surface again.¡± ¡°So he hurt you?¡± ¡°No. He tried to kiss me.¡± ¡°Right.¡± He paused again, clearly seething on the other end of the line. ¡°Just give me the full story from start to finish.¡± ¡°Okay, well, he was throwing stones into the ocean, and I was headed down to the beach. I asked him to show me how to throw them with my mind, and he said we needed high stakes to force my power out of hiding. So we agreed that. . .¡± ¡°The wager was a kiss?¡± David asked, but not in a dull, flat tone, more like he was laughing. ¡°Um, yeah. We were playing keep-off. If he got the stone, I had to kiss him.¡± ¡°And if he didn¡¯t get the stone?¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± ¡°Right. So he didn¡¯t believe for a second that you¡¯d actually use that power, did he?¡± ¡°Of course he did. But I guess that was my grand prize¡ªthe knowledge of power.¡± ¡°Fine. So you were running from him?¡± ¡°Yes. But, when he captured the stone and he was standing right in front of me, all geared up to accept his prize, I couldn¡¯t do it. And I was holding the stone in my hand, and it got really hot.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°I thought Jase¡ª¡± ¡°Jason,¡± he warned. ¡°Jason,¡± I corrected, rolling my eyes, ¡°was doing it to me, you know, making it burn to make me fight. But even he got scared when my hand started melting.¡± ¡°Melting?¡± ¡°Yeah. The stone got so hot my hand fused shut and I couldn¡¯t get it out. Jason stepped in to help me, but I thought he¡¯d make it worse. So I kind of, I dunno, I didn¡¯t want him to touch me, and then he just fell to the floor. When the stone stopped burning, his arm was broken, and I don¡¯t really remember doing it.¡± ¡°Do you remember how you got the stone to stop burning?¡± ¡°I melted it,¡± I said simply. ¡°I felt it turn to cold glass in my hand, and then it just melted.¡± ¡°You . . . you melted it?¡± ¡°Uh-huh.¡± I nodded. ¡°Okay, I¡¯m gonna need some time to process this,¡± he said distractedly, then came back into the conversation with a completely different tone. ¡°On another note, did you go see Arthur about that rash?¡± My hand went to my hip to scratch it. ¡°No.¡± ¡°Why not?¡± I inhaled to the deepest part of my lungs and let it out. According to the book Petey showed me, the one safely back under my bed, I already knew what the rash was. I just wasn¡¯t sure Arthur could mix up a remedy to fix a Mark of Betrayal, and I wasn¡¯t really sure what I¡¯d done wrong, either. So, until I figured this out, the last thing I wanted to do was tell anyone about it. ¡°He¡¯s my uncle, David. I feel kind of funny talking to him about that stuff.¡± Page 37 ¡°Don¡¯t be silly, Ara. The fact that he is your uncle is exactly why you can talk to him about anything. And he¡¯s seen it all, my love, not just every ailment known to man, but he¡¯s seen your entirely naked body, too. Who do you think stitched your organs back in after you fell off the lighthouse?¡±Advertisement I cringed. ¡°So don¡¯t feel embarrassed around him. Just go show him and let him fix you.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I looked at the floor just under the corner of my bed. ¡°I¡¯ll go see him now.¡± ¡°Thank you. And call me as soon as you¡¯re done.¡± ¡°I will.¡± I hung up and stuffed the phone in my pocket as I landed on my hands and knees and lowered my face to the ground, peering under the bed. The book was still there, undiscovered. Clearly the maids didn¡¯t sweep under here often. I reached in and pulled it out, sitting with my back against the mattress after. There was only one sure-fire way to find a cure for anything, and that was to find the cause. But no matter how many times I studied this book, I never really found anything other than one conclusion about my role as this ordained goddess: I was an open book, and all my secrets were painted in cryptic ink on my body for all to see. None of the Marks I¡¯d read about seemed to be anything more than images that told stories; each one shaped differently according to what I liked to call its ¡®genre¡¯. I knew there were Marks that could cause the bearer damage, heartache, all kinds of things, but none of these fit that category. Not even this so-called Mark of Betrayal. Far as I knew, it was harmless. I flipped through the pages again, taking mental notes, and when I came to the page Petey showed me, stopped and ran my hand over it. There was only the one English translation, and I hadn¡¯t yet learned enough words of the Ancient Language to decipher anything other than what I already knew. But I knew a few people who could. Only problem was, that would mean involving other people. I lifted my top and checked the Mark. Just like the drawing in front of me, it was snakelike, wrapping my waist and hip from my rib to the soft patch of skin just above my pubic bone. It was red, raised, itchy, and black on top, like an incomplete tattoo. ¡°Betrayal.¡± I read the word aloud, smudging the ink slightly with my fingertip. I hadn¡¯t done anything that would betray anyone, as far as I knew, unless Mother Nature considered falling off the lighthouse a betrayal. I closed the book, shrugging. Maybe She did. Maybe, in Her opinion, being careless enough to be on a lighthouse and fall in the first place was betrayal. Who knew? The only solid conclusion I had was that I¡¯d done something to betray someone or something and, as an Auress, I couldn¡¯t hide from it¡ªlike every secret thought or act that betrayed my crown would be catalogued physically. And that thought made me look up, even though the answer wasn¡¯t above my sliding glass door. But something in my own words clicked: betrayal to the crown. There were things I could do as queen, decisions I could make to my own free will, provided I always had the peoples¡¯ best interests in mind. So maybe that was it. Maybe I¡¯d made some decision, committed some act that I hadn¡¯t realised was going against my crown. If I could figure that out and put it right, maybe I could get rid of this Mark myself. But, to figure it out, I¡¯d have to think carefully back to everything I did the day I fell off that lighthouse, and check that against my notes on the laws of the Lilithian reign, and maybe even against some of the known laws of Nature. I snapped the book shut and stood up. I had a lot of study to do. The flames burned low in the open fire across from me, their golden glow flickering against my hands and my books, lighting the words on the page. I could see now why Arthur lit the fire when he came here to read at night. It really was quite a lonely place, but not so desolate with those sparkling embers, and the smoky smell of burning wood kind of ¡®took me home¡¯ in a sense. I sat down with another book in hand to cross reference, but the lure of Jase¡¯s diary was calling me in a voice louder than the one seeking the answer about my Mark. ¡°Okay, okay. Just a little look,¡± I said to myself and shoved the giant Book of Shadows aside, its dusty pages snapping shut like an iron door. Jase¡¯s book was small, no bigger than a short novel, with the leather having been bent so many times the spine was wrinkled and looked almost dirty between the cracks. I determined, as I gently unfolded the pages, that it must have been about a hundred years old. And I got a very sudden sense of respect for the wisdom Jase must have collected over that time. The first page was titled by its date: 1914. There were scribbles and lines in the margins¡ªnotes taken then corrected, some in different inks, as if he¡¯d come back to this page many times. In fact, all the pages seemed to be in the same condition, and I guessed he¡¯d experienced signs of his telekinesis long before he actually knew what it was. I scrolled down through the curvy text, looking for keywords, since I really didn¡¯t have time to sit and study the entire entry. When I spotted the words accidental and David, I narrowed my grid and read that passage: My brother, David, staring back at me. He wasn¡¯t supposed to be there. I hadn¡¯t seen him for some months now, and to aim my gun right in his face and almost pull the trigger, well, let¡¯s just say that¡¯s not the happy reunion either of us expected. Our meeting was purely accidental, coincidental, who knows? But I was mighty glad to see the guy. For a while, I thought he was dead. I know that¡¯s not possible, but I worried anyhow. ¡°This must have been from the war,¡± I whispered to myself, so awed by it that myself turned the page. ¡°No.¡± I slapped my own wrist and closed the book. ¡°Stay on track.¡± ¡°Okay, okay,¡± I replied and slid the giant Book of Shadows in front of me again, using a bit of might to pry it open and a bit of skill to stop the heavy pages on the right from flipping over and covering what I was reading on the left: the title page. Just the same as human parents once did in their family bibles, the names of each child in this witch¡¯s bloodline had been scribed on the first page, a sort of naming ritual. And there, at the bottom, right under Callon LeFay, was Morgana. I held my breath. She was real. And this could be living proof that she at least grew old enough to read. Perhaps this book was passed down to her. Perhaps she knew all the spells by heart. Maybe she was wondering what ever happened to the book. As I went to turn the page¡ªtake a little stickybeak at some spells¡ªa certain combination of letters in a very unusual name stood out at me from the list: Anandene. ¡°Anandene?¡± My nose crinkled. Anandene and Morgana were related? There were no lines connecting the names. None that even connected Callon to Morgana, so there was no way to know if Anandene had been directly or distantly related to Morgana. The names were simply listed like required ingredients in a fancy dish. Typical. I¡¯d opened this stupid book to find answers, and all it had done was create another bloody mystery. I dropped my head into my hands. As if I needed any more mysteries right now. ¡°Ooh, what spell are we doing?¡± Eve said, sitting on the desk beside the book¡ªher legs crossed like a lady, an eager grin on her dead face. ¡°We are not doing any spells.¡± I gently turned a few pages until they balanced equally on each side. ¡°I was hoping to find something that might get rid of unwanted ink.¡± ¡°Try the back of the book,¡± she muttered in a hateful huff and vanished. I scowled at the empty space. ¡°Thanks for your help.¡± As the coals in the fireplace burned to embers and the early morning chill of an approaching autumn settled around my nose and ears, I flipped past hundreds of spells that healed broken or sick things, potions mixed for ailments and hopes, and when I came to the end of the book, found a stack of notes and spells stuffed in between the last page and the hard cover. One was a love spell. I tossed it aside. Did not need that. One was a sleeping spell. I tucked that into my pocket for the next time I needed an easy escape. But the last one I unfolded was written in another language, the page so thin and delicate I wasn¡¯t sure it was actually ever paper. I laid it beside a sheet parchment and scribbled down the symbols and words exactly, copying the pictures and the diagrams, then stuffed it all back in the book and closed it. I wasn¡¯t sure what the spell did, but I knew of some translation books that could help me figure it out. And, also, I had Jason. He could read that language as well as Arthur could. I knew he¡¯d help if I asked. ¡°The Aide-Memoire de l¡¯Auress, an encyclopaedia of Lilithian law, and several books on magic,¡± Arthur said. ¡°What could our young queen be searching for?¡± ¡°Arthur?¡± I gasped, flipping the books closed and most certainly losing my pages. ¡°What are you doing up so late?¡± He pulled out a chair beside me and sat down, moving a few books upward to make room for his elbow. ¡°I¡¯m not much of a sleeper.¡± I felt the weight of being sprung bare down on me, making my whole face go hot. My fingers wrung the hem of my dress tightly and my eyes wouldn¡¯t shift from the books. I needed to come up with an excuse for having these titles checked out, but I couldn¡¯t think of one. ¡°I¡ª¡± ¡°You don¡¯t have to explain anything to me, princess.¡± He reached across and patted my hand. ¡°I was just teasing, but,¡± he said as he stood up. ¡°If you need help with anything, you know you can come to me, right?¡± I nodded, keeping my eyes on the books. ¡°Very well.¡± I saw him bow his head once in my peripheral. ¡°I shall leave you to it. Just don¡¯t stay up too much longer.¡± ¡°I won¡¯t,¡± I said, then spun in my chair to look at him. ¡°Arthur?¡± ¡°Yes, my dear.¡± I took a deep breath, still considering my words. ¡°I . . . I have a rash.¡± His eyes squared off a bit under a furrowed brow. ¡°What kind of rash?¡± ¡°Um, this kind.¡± I stood up and lifted my top. ¡°I already know it¡¯s a Mark of Betrayal,¡± I said, and Arthur¡¯s eyes met mine. ¡°I just can¡¯t. . .¡± I motioned to the books behind me. ¡°I can¡¯t figure out why.¡± He looked away, slowly exhaling. ¡°I may know why.¡± ¡°Why?¡± I stepped closer. ¡°What have I done?¡± ¡°It¡¯s. . .¡± He seemed to be considering his words very carefully, looking from the books to me, and back again. ¡°Eventually, you will figure it out. Eventually, it will not be a secret I can keep but, for now¡ª¡± He bowed once. ¡°I must ask you not to seek the answer.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because I fear the truth could bring you more harm than a little rash on your flesh.¡± I opened my mouth to protest, but took a second and let the words simmer through me instead, considering them, taking them for every ounce of meaning I could hear in his undertone and thinking long and hard in that second whether or not I wanted to challenge him. ¡°Okay, so, maybe don¡¯t tell me the truth right now, but at least tell me how it could bring me harm.¡± Page 38 ¡°You¡¯re going to lose your husband in a few short months, Amara. Any time you have with him is precious, and any memories you have from your past should only be happy ones.¡±Advertisement ¡°And what¡¯s that got to do with my rash?¡± ¡°That fact that it has anything to do with your rash is exactly why you should leave it alone. And I¡¯ve told David the same.¡± ¡°What does he know about it?¡± ¡°He knows it¡¯s not a rash, my dear. He wasn¡¯t born yesterday.¡± ¡°But he doesn¡¯t know what kind of Mark it is, does he?¡± ¡°No. Which is why he¡¯s been looking for that book.¡± He nodded to the table. ¡°The Journal of the Auress?¡± ¡°Yes, and you must keep it from him at all costs, Amara.¡± He used a tone of ¡®grave warning¡¯, but it only made me laugh. He might have known the full weight of what he said but, to me, I couldn''t piece anything together based on that statement, and it just wasn¡¯t going to be enough to quash my curiosity¡ªnot for this version of me, anyway. ¡°I don¡¯t understand.¡± ¡°The truth he will find in that journal will be too much for him to bear.¡± ¡°What if we want the truth, even if it has something to do with destroying happy memories?¡± ¡°Then, I guess you have a lot of reading to do, my dear.¡± He nodded to my books then turned on his heel. ¡°Because you¡¯ll not be hearing it from me.¡± I huffed, dropping my hands to my hips as Arthur walked away. ¡°How rude.¡± ¡°He means well,¡± Eve said, suddenly beside me. ¡°He just doesn¡¯t want to be the one that hurts you.¡± ¡°Hurts me?¡± I looked sideways at her then back at the empty library. ¡°How would he hurt me?¡± ¡°When you figure out the puzzle, you¡¯ll understand why.¡± ¡°Puzzle. What puzzle?¡± I frowned. ¡°And, hey, why did you push me out the window the other day?¡± She smiled, her young face looking innocent. ¡°To free your soul.¡± ¡°Free my. . .? How would that free my soul? Eve?¡± I called, circling on the spot a few times, but the ghost was gone. I always loved the manor kitchen, with its warm, country feel, wood counter tops crowning rustic-looking cupboards, and a giant old dining table that centred the space¡ªits washed, fading green colour stylishly unmatched by the white chairs pushed in under it. The whole room had that ¡®grandmother¡¯s kitchen¡¯ kind of feel, with a collection of herbs and spices grown fresh in the garden then hung inside over the windows or the stove, and a pot rack suspended from thick black chains over an island counter. But my favourite thing about this place was that, in the morning, the soft scent of fresh bread, toasted slowly over an open flame, would accompany the rich aroma of Italian Roast, drawing me gently awake the closer I got. I wandered in and sat down, swinging my legs under the table as the carbon copy of Mike placed a mug and a pitcher of cream in front of me. ¡°Hey, Falcon.¡± ¡°Morning, My Queen. Sleep well?¡± ¡°Knowing I had Quaid outside my door all night?¡± I grinned. ¡°Of course.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± He sat down. ¡°I sleep better when I have a guard on you. I just. . .¡± ¡°Just?¡± ¡°You know I don¡¯t usually order it every night. But, last night, I had a hunch.¡± ¡°A hunch?¡± My brow arched, the scepticism hidden behind my coffee mug as I took a sip. It was no creamy, sugary delight, like David¡¯s coffee, but it was nice to have someone make it for me. ¡°What kind of hunch?¡± He exhaled loudly, swiping his thumb across his bottom lip. ¡°Whenever I get those . . . feelings, you usually end up in some kind of trouble.¡± ¡°But I didn¡¯t last night.¡± I flashed a cheesy grin, cocking my head like an innocent puppy. ¡°No. But we did pick up a suspicious scent around the border of the manor this morning. Whoever it was, they may have been on their way to see you.¡± ¡°Ooh, creepy.¡± I dusted myself off jokingly. ¡°Anyway, I wasn¡¯t in my room for most of last night. I was reading in the library.¡± ¡°I know.¡± He sipped his coffee. ¡°What were you looking for? Anything I can help with?¡± ¡°Hopefully. That¡¯s why I asked you here this morning.¡± ¡°Okay, so what is it?¡± ¡°I need to show you something,¡± I said, feeling a little awkward. He sat back, folding his arms as if waiting for me to tell him I¡¯d gotten myself into some kind of mess. ¡°Need to show me what, exactly?¡± ¡°It¡¯s nothing bad. I mean, I hope.¡± I stood and lifted my shirt, scooping my jeans down an inch to show where the black rash snuck down below my pubic line. ¡°The Mark of Betrayal,¡± he said, clearing his throat after. ¡°You know what it is?¡± I twisted at the waist a little to look all the way around at the back of my hip. ¡°I happen to have extensively studied anything to do with you, your body, your past, and your bloodline, Ara. Of course I know what it is.¡± ¡°You¡¯ve studied me?¡± I lowered my top and pulled my jeans up again. ¡°Your Majesty, I am Head of the Queen¡¯s Guard. That role comes with certain expectations.¡± He walked over to the sink and dumped his cup in there. ¡°I should be the number-one most educated man in this manor when it comes to you.¡± ¡°So, how do you know what kind of Mark it is?¡± ¡°Because it wraps your torso from your heart to your hip¡ªit¡¯s the only Mark of its kind. And the question is, Ara¡ª¡± He propped one foot on the seat of the chair, resting his arm over his knee. ¡°What have you done?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± I leaned my butt on the tabletop. ¡°I was hoping maybe if I could figure out what kinds of things would give me this Mark, then maybe I could¡ª¡± ¡°Ara, what ever it is you¡¯ve done, to be Marked with that symbol, it has to have been something pretty spectacular.¡± He dropped his foot to the floor, standing tall again. ¡°That¡¯s one of the Four Detriments.¡± ¡°The what now?¡± ¡°There are four things a queen can do that ultimately betray her crown, her people or herself. You don¡¯t need to figure out so much what it is you did, but perhaps whom you did it to. And there should be a symbol somewhere in that mess of a rash all over you that reveals it.¡± ¡°Well, which one.¡± I lifted my top and poked at the black line. ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± He put my top down for me. ¡°And stop doing that. If anyone walks past, they¡¯ll think we¡¯re being inappropriate.¡± ¡°Oh. Sorry, Falcon. That wasn¡¯t my intention.¡± ¡°I know. Just. . .¡± His eyes drifted away from me. ¡°Just be more careful.¡± ¡°Sorry.¡± ¡°Stop saying sorry.¡± He pulled the chair out and sat down, offering me my seat again. ¡°How long have you had the Mark, Ara?¡± ¡°It started as a red rash after I fell off the lighthouse, and it¡¯s just been changing since then.¡± ¡°The lighthouse?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Did you jump?¡± he asked, and silence befell the room. ¡°I¡ª¡± My mouth opened, but I was so shocked by the question I struggled to form an answer. ¡°No way. I¡¯d never do something like that.¡± ¡°Are you sure? Maybe you were so depressed about David being away that you¡ª¡± ¡°No! Falcon, that¡¯s ludicrous.¡± I jumped up and walked over to the sink. ¡°It would take a lot more than that to make me want to die.¡± ¡°Bingo.¡± He appeared beside me. ¡°Then, what did you do before you ended up on the lighthouse that night?¡± My immediate reaction was to protest. But I stopped. What if something really bad had happened, and I did actually jump? I mean, David was there that night. What if he and I had an argument¡ªwhat if he told me the truth about going to his death, and that¡¯s why I jumped, knowing I didn¡¯t want to live without him? It would make sense. It would explain why he was so hell-bent on keeping the truth from me. Or maybe it wasn¡¯t that at all. Maybe, just like my gut had been trying to tell me, it had something to do with Jason. ¡°I can¡¯t think of anything that would be bad enough to make me want to die, can you?¡± ¡°Damned if I know, Ara.¡± He shrugged, stepping away. ¡°Unfortunately, there are no books I can study that get inside your head.¡± ¡°But someone can.¡± A suggestive grin teased my lips. ¡°Someone can get in my head and go back to that night¡ªsee what happened.¡± He settled back on his heels. ¡°Jason.¡± ¡°Yes. Maybe I could ask him to, I dunno, hypnotise me and take me back on a past-month regression?¡± ¡°Bad idea, Ara.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because, A: he¡¯s not allowed near you, especially when the king is absent. And, B: until we know exactly what happened and whether or not you did, in fact, jump, every person in this manor is guilty until proven innocent. Including David,¡± he added. ¡°Why David? He¡¯d never hurt me.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know that. And neither do you, really. He¡¯s pretty vial, Ara, especially when it comes to the law. For all we know, he pushed you off the lighthouse.¡± ¡°Why would he push me?¡± ¡°Who knows? All I know is that he was out there that night, and it¡¯s a pretty convenient story that he just happened to return here to ¡°talk¡± with you.¡± ¡°Yeah, but¡ª¡± ¡°But nothing. It¡¯s my job to protect you, Your Majesty, even if that means from the king.¡± ¡°That¡¯s exactly why I should go to Jason, and¡ª¡± ¡°And how do you know it wasn¡¯t him?¡± He let that hang for a second. ¡°He was the last one to see you that night, Ara. Not to mention, your memory is gone. How do we know he didn¡¯t erase it?¡± I rubbed my head. ¡°So we tell no one?¡± ¡°Look, let me take a good look at the book of Marks, and another good look at your body¡ªin private.¡± He looked around as if someone might have heard him say that. ¡°And if we can¡¯t come up with an answer, then we¡¯ll discuss further investigation, okay?¡± ¡°Okay.¡± ¡°Right. And just until we¡¯ve figured this out, I want guards on you at night.¡± I took a deep breath and let it out. ¡°Okay. If that eases your mind.¡± ¡°It will.¡± He nodded once. ¡°And, thank you, Falcon¡ªfor helping me out with this.¡± I motioned to my Mark. ¡°It¡¯s always my pleasure, Majesty, and I know I don¡¯t need to say it, but . . . you can trust this information will go no further than me.¡± Page 39 ¡°Not to Mike?¡± He held back a small laugh. ¡°Especially not to Mike.¡±Advertisement Chapter Eight ¡°You wanted to see me?¡± I said, popping my head around Jason¡¯s door. ¡°Yeah, come in.¡± His arm rose in a wave from his huddle over the spread of papers in front of him. I stopped a second to look back at Falcon. ¡°Coming, Fal?¡± ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± He gave a small nod of approval. ¡°I can hear everything from out here.¡± I flashed him a grin and closed Jason¡¯s door behind me, shutting us into his room, alone. ¡°What¡¯s up, Jase?¡± ¡°I know why the stone melted. But that wasn¡¯t why I asked you here.¡± He leaned his butt against the table and folded his arms. ¡°You were thinking about something at breakfast.¡± ¡°I¡¯m always thinking about something.¡± ¡°Yes, but this thought involved me.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I wondered over and sat on the blanket box at the foot of his bed. ¡°What thought was it?¡± ¡°You have something you want me to translate into English.¡± My fingertips slowly moved to my hip pocket. ¡°Yes.¡± He held his hand out. ¡°Show me.¡± ¡°I have no idea what kind of spell it is¡ªor if it even is a spell,¡± I said, passing him the page I found last night. He considered it for a second. ¡°It¡¯s a junction fabricator.¡± ¡°What¡¯s that?¡± ¡°It creates pathways over the dead.¡± He turned around and laid it on the desk, grabbing another sheet of paper and a pen. ¡°The dead? Do you mean, like¡ª¡± ¡°Like brings dead things back to life, if the body isn¡¯t damaged. But it¡¯s not black magic,¡± he added quickly. ¡°It¡¯s simply a kind of highway, you might say, that guides a soul from one realm to another and puts it where you want it.¡± ¡°Realm?¡± ¡°Yes. Think of it as if we live in layers.¡± He laid one hand over the other in the air. ¡°Up top, we have the spirit realm, and below, we have the mortal realm.¡± ¡°And this spell makes a path for a person to cross sides?¡± ¡°To cross back, yeah. Unless its body had no head, or something like that.¡± He leaned over the page again and started taking notes. I watched the symbols on one page turn to English on the other under his pen tip, picturing the actions of the spell in my head. ¡°There¡¯s something else,¡± Jason said without looking up, and I stared at him, waiting, but he didn¡¯t elaborate. ¡°What¡¯s something else?¡± He stopped writing with a rather expressive full stop and dumped his pen down. ¡°This rash.¡± ¡°What about it?¡± ¡°Show it to me.¡± He looked at my waist. ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because it¡¯s not what you think it is, and I want to see how much it¡¯s changed.¡± I reluctantly inched my shirt up my ribs and drew my tummy in a bit as his warm hands cupped my waist. He knelt down in front of me, his tepid breath calling the tiny hairs above my jeans to attention, and spun me this way and that, frowning, tracing lines over the black rash. ¡°I know you¡¯ve already decided it¡¯s a Mark of Betrayal, but it¡¯s not because you¡¯ve done anything wrong, Ara.¡± ¡°Then what¡¯s it from?¡± I pulled my top down as Jason stood up again. He propped his shoulder on the tall bedpost, his legs leaned out long, arms folded, making me feel small under his penetrating gaze. ¡°It¡¯s betrayal of the heart.¡± ¡°Of the heart?¡± I touched my chest absently. ¡°In what way?¡± He just shrugged, lowering his face to hide that sheepish grin. ¡°Oh, right. You think I love you, huh?¡± I said jokingly. But he just shrugged again. ¡°Maybe.¡± ¡°Jase¡ª¡± ¡°Look. Just don¡¯t, okay.¡± He raised both palms. ¡°I didn¡¯t bring you here to argue about your feelings, Ara. I just wanted you to stop trying to figure out what you did wrong.¡± His arms fell to his sides. ¡°You¡¯ve done nothing wrong.¡± I walked a little closer, my eyes narrowing with curiosity, and stopped right in front of him. ¡°I think I know what it is.¡± ¡°What?¡± he asked, his eyes a little wider than normal. ¡°I. . .¡± I had to tell him. I had to tell someone what happened between Arthur and I in the training room that night¡ªthe night I fell of the lighthouse. Or jumped. ¡°I already know, Ara. And that has nothing to do with the Mark.¡± ¡°You already know what?¡± ¡°I know about my uncle and the training hall, and the . . . turkey baster plan you came up with after.¡± Invisible lava coated my cheeks. ¡°How?¡± He glanced back at his bed and reversed a few steps to sit on it. ¡°I found you that night. You were . . . Mike was there, too. He was towering over you, yelling at you, and I¡ª¡± ¡°You what?¡± ¡°I punched him in the face and took you up to bed.¡± ¡°What! Why?¡± ¡°He went down there to drop some cuffs off, and he found you half naked on the floor, wearing only Arthur¡¯s shirt.¡± ¡°Oh my God.¡± I covered my mouth. ¡°So he¡¯s known? This entire time, he knew what I planned to do with¡ª¡± ¡°No.¡± He looked up from the floor. ¡°I erased everything about Arthur from his mind the next day. And then I erased yours, took everything from the moment he walked into the training hall that night.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Two reasons.¡± ¡°One?¡± I prompted. ¡°One: you were distressed about it all¡ªabout Mike knowing. And, two: he would have told David about this plan you and Arthur had.¡± ¡°So you stopped him?¡± ¡°Yes, but not just because David would freak out.¡± ¡°Then, why?¡± ¡°Because Mike. . .¡± ¡°Mike?¡± ¡°He was irate, Ara. He got scared. He thought you¡¯d actually slept with Arthur¡ªthat David would hate you now. And all he could think about was the pieces of you he had to pick up last time David left. He just didn¡¯t want to see you like that again. And. . .¡± His lips folded into a thin line. ¡°He overreacted. He slapped you.¡± ¡°Slapped me?¡± My neck jutted outward like a jumper on a skyscraper. ¡°Yeah. It was just a shitty situation, Ara. I was mad with him at first but . . . I understand what he was going through then.¡± ¡°Delusions of grandeur?¡± Jase laughed. ¡°Probably. All that aside, though, he was packing his bag the next morning, about to quit and go back to Australia.¡± ¡°Oh my God.¡± ¡°I knew you still needed him, so. . .¡± he continued. ¡°I erased it from his mind.¡± ¡°And then I jumped off the lighthouse?¡± He looked up at me curiously. ¡°What makes you think you jumped?¡± I shrugged. ¡°Just a hunch.¡± ¡°Hunch, huh?¡± He sighed, both hands going to his head as he flopped back on his bed. ¡°You know why I jumped, don¡¯t you?¡± ¡°I may.¡± ¡°Then. . .¡± I walked over and sat down beside his leg. ¡°Tell me.¡± He opened one eye and looked out from behind his hands. ¡°I can¡¯t.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because it¡¯s better left buried, Ara. Believe me.¡± ¡°Why?¡± He sat up again, coming to stop with my hand in his. ¡°You trust me, right?¡± I nodded. ¡°And you know that¡ª¡± He squeezed my hand. ¡°I always have your best interests at heart?¡± ¡°Uh-huh.¡± I nodded again. ¡°Then, can you wait? Please. Ask me to tell you another time, maybe when David¡¯s gone.¡± ¡°Why? Is it because of what happened with Arthur?¡± He tensed, wincing. ¡°Kind of. But not really.¡± ¡°Jase.¡± I laid my other hand over his. ¡°You know I can¡¯t just let this go. You¡¯d be better off telling me the truth now¡ªsave me all the investigation and worry.¡± He laughed, his lovely white teeth making me a little hungry for the bite. ¡°I want what¡¯s best for you, Ara. We all do. But if I tell you what happened that night, it¡¯ll make you hate yourself.¡± ¡°Well, if I want to berate myself for something I did, that¡¯s my prerogative, Jase. Not yours.¡± ¡°You¡¯re right.¡± He nodded, his distracted gaze moving toward his window. ¡°And I will tell you. But not today.¡± ¡°Hmpf!¡± I mashed my features together in a scowl. ¡°You¡¯re starting to sound like David.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry. That¡¯s the last thing I want to say to you, Ara, but I have to protect you. And you know I always tell you the truth, but this time, I¡ª¡± ¡°You¡¯re between a rock and hard place.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± He exhaled through a smile. ¡°I just need your understanding on this one, just for now.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I nodded. ¡°Fine. But you¡¯ve got two weeks, and that¡¯s it. Then, you better tell me what the hell happened that night. Fair?¡± ¡°Very fair.¡± ¡°Pinkie promise.¡± He laid his pinkie over mine and shook once. ¡°I promise.¡± ¡°Good. Now, what was this conclusion you drew about my melting stone problem?¡± ¡°Ah.¡± He stood up quickly. ¡°So, I was right about the lightning theory¡ªthe fulgurite.¡± ¡°You were.¡± I stood beside him at the table. ¡°Yes. You really didn¡¯t wanna kiss me, did you?¡± He turned to me, smiling. ¡°Um. Kinda not really.¡± ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± He lifted my chin, green eyes meeting blue in a world of acceptance. ¡°But, that fear¡ªfor whatever reason you didn¡¯t want to kiss me, ignited your fight instinct in the method of which you''ve been practicing most, but when your hand heated up, the temperature acted to reverse the process of making rock, you might say, by turning it back to its original state.¡± ¡°Wow.¡± ¡°Yeah. Wow. And . . . did you get a headache when you used your light?¡± he asked, wearing a huge I-know-what-I¡¯m-talking-about grin. ¡°Um. Now I think of it.¡± I touched my head. ¡°No.¡± ¡°Right.¡± He grabbed a stack of papers and started writing. ¡°That just confirms my theory.¡± ¡°What does?¡± ¡°You got scared, focused your concerns too much on the rock. You made it the problem, so, your electric energy rose up to protect you. Your skin melted, you felt the pain, thought I was causing it, and broke my arm to stop me.¡± ¡°Well, I gathered that much.¡± Page 40 ¡°Right, but. . .¡± He tapped the page once with his pen. ¡°I don¡¯t believe your blue light thing is actually meant to be used as a weapon.¡±Advertisement ¡°What else would it be for?¡± ¡°Not sure.¡± He rubbed his brow. ¡°I need to think.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I took a step back. ¡°Shall I come back later?¡± ¡°No. I¡¯ll come see you at training. Tell Blade I¡¯ll be there: he can get the others to back off.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I looked at the door then back at Jase. ¡°So this is what the crazy scientist part of you looks like?¡± He stopped writing and slowly looked up, turning his gaze on me a second later. ¡°Sorry.¡± ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± I held both hands up. ¡°Go ahead and theorise. If you can figure out how to make me melt stone again, that¡¯d¡ª¡± ¡°I¡¯m more worried about your headaches, right now, sweet girl,¡± he said, and turned away to scribble things down. ¡°If you wanna melt stone again, just go sit on the beach with one in your hand, Ara, and think back to how you felt the other day. Reliving the same emotions should give you the ability to recreate the scenario. Just¡ª¡± He stopped and held up his arm, sporting a smart grin. ¡°Do it alone.¡± I laughed. ¡°Okay. Maybe I¡¯ll go out there after training today, if I have time.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± He went back to his pages. ¡°And, Ara?¡± ¡°Mm?¡± I stopped by the open door. ¡°Don¡¯t forget this.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± I skipped over and took the translated spell from him. ¡°Thanks.¡± ¡°Any time,¡± he said, without even looking up. The training hall was empty, except for the lone knight in the corner, taking out what looked like a year¡¯s worth of fury on the punching bag. His arms were tight, the muscles lean and long, covered in a thin layer of perspiration, which I gathered wasn¡¯t so much from the punching but from the restraint he was using not to break that bag. ¡°Mike?¡± He looked up and wiped his wrist over his chin, then hit the bag again. ¡°You¡¯re early.¡± ¡°I know. I uh¡ª¡± I looked out the windows to see if anyone else was coming. ¡°I wanted to talk to you.¡± ¡°What about?¡± I stopped with both hands on the weighted bag to steady it. ¡°You okay, Mike?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± He gave it another hit, the sheer force absorbed by my buckling knees. ¡°Just girl troubles.¡± ¡°Girl troubles?¡± There was something odd about the way he looked at me then, as if maybe he thought I already knew¡ªor should know. ¡°What¡¯d you want, Ara?¡± ¡°Um.¡± I wiped my hands on my jeans. ¡°Do you remember the night I fell off the lighthouse?¡± He frowned at me, then turned to the bench behind him and grabbed a towel, disappearing under it for a second. ¡°Why?¡± ¡°If I tell you something, will you promise not to investigate further until I say so?¡± His scruffy hair stuck up from out of the towel first, followed by his wide caramel eyes. ¡°I make no guarantees.¡± ¡°I thought you¡¯d say that.¡± I spun on my heel and headed for the door. ¡°Wait,¡± he called, grabbing my arm. ¡°Just . . . what do you know, Ara? If it¡¯s something that puts you in danger, I can¡¯t¡ª¡± ¡°It doesn¡¯t. But I¡¯ve heard from two people so far that if I know the full story, it could lead to some problems between David and I.¡± ¡°See? Now, that¡¯s concern enough right there.¡± He flopped the towel over his shoulder. ¡°I know. But you either agree to my terms, or I walk.¡± He repositioned the towel. ¡°What terms?¡± ¡°Promise me you won¡¯t rough up my source.¡± He rocked back on his heels, his lip curling in disgust. ¡°Your source is Jason, isn¡¯t it?¡± I nodded. I could see Mike was in a tough spot here. He knew I wouldn¡¯t come to him unless the information I had was good, but he also knew I wouldn¡¯t share one shred of it if I thought Jason might get hurt. ¡°Fine,¡± he rescinded. ¡°I won¡¯t torture the little shit for information. Now, what d¡¯you wanna tell me?¡± ¡°You hit me.¡± His brow folded, but then he laughed. ¡°Seriously, Mike. You hit me because you thought I slept with Arthur.¡± ¡°What?¡± he coughed. ¡°Ara, that¡¯s . . . I¡¯d remember thinking something like that.¡± ¡°Precisely.¡± I smirked. His arms fell heavily to his sides. ¡°Nob-head erased it.¡± ¡°Jason, yes.¡± ¡°And that¡¯s why I don¡¯t remember coming down here the night you fell.¡± He looked over to the weapons shelf where the cuffs sat¡ªall lined up like shining reminders. ¡°So, what, you were down here, and I. . .?¡± ¡°You could smell Arthur had been here, too.¡± ¡°What were you doing here with him?¡± ¡°Talking. Where no one could hear¡ª¡± ¡°Why?¡± he cut in before I could finish. ¡°We were trying to find a way to save David.¡± ¡°From what?¡± ¡°Using the dagger to kill Drake¡ª¡± ¡°You knew about it then?¡± I nodded. ¡°And I didn¡¯t have sex with Arthur, Mike,¡± I promised. ¡°Except. . .¡± ¡°I wouldn¡¯t listen,¡± he said with a nod. ¡°And I. . .¡± ¡°You slapped me.¡± He looked at my face for a long moment, his eyes going smaller with thought. ¡°I¡¯d never do that, Ara.¡± ¡°I know. Jason said he found you the next day, packing to leave because of it. He knew I needed you here, so he erased it.¡± ¡°And you believe him?¡± I nodded. Mike¡¯s hands went into his hair. He walked backward until he found the bench, then sat down. ¡°Ara, I¡¯m¡ª¡± ¡°It¡¯s okay, Mike.¡± I appeared beside him. ¡°You were stressed and worried. I get that. But I know you. I mean, I don¡¯t have any memory of you coming down here, only my talk with Arthur beforehand,¡± I said. ¡°But I know you wouldn¡¯t have hurt me. It was probably a pathetic little tap.¡± ¡°That doesn''t make it okay, Ar.¡± He stood up again, slipping a shirt over his head and down his ribs. ¡°I¡¯m the chief of security¡ªthe one person in the world who is trusted to protect you, and I . . . I hit you?¡± His eyes narrowed as he muttered the last words in stunned disbelief. ¡°Aw, Mike?¡± I stood up. ¡°Maybe I shouldn¡¯t have told you.¡± ¡°No.¡± He opened himself up for a hug. ¡°I¡¯m glad you did, Ara. It¡¯s . . . I should know.¡± I fell into his sweaty embrace. ¡°If it means anything, Mike, I forgive you.¡± ¡°Aw.¡± He kissed my head firmly. ¡°You¡¯re a good girl, Ara. But, I. . .¡± ¡°You?¡± ¡°You ended up falling off a lighthouse after that. Are you sure I didn¡¯t¡ª¡± ¡°You didn¡¯t throw me off it, Mike. You went up to your room, and Jason took me back to bed.¡± ¡°Then . . . does he know how you ended up out there that night?¡± I nodded. ¡°I think Arthur knows something, too. But. . .¡± ¡°But?¡± ¡°Well, Falcon and I have been doing some research, and¡ª¡± ¡°Falcon?¡± I nodded. ¡°He¡¯s my go-to guy.¡± Mike half frowned, half smiled. I could tell he was as pleased as he was shocked. ¡°Anyway,¡± I continued, ¡°we think maybe I jum¡ª¡± ¡°Ara?¡± Falcon swept into the room, flanked by Blade and Quaid, the three of them making an awful lot of racket¡ªcertainly enough to drown out anything I might have said. ¡°Whazzup, guys?¡± Mike flashed them a toothy grin, turning his head to whisper, ¡°We¡¯ll talk later,¡± under his breath. I nodded, patting his arm, and Mike skipped off into the mix as if the guys hadn¡¯t just tried to silence me. However, I was not so willing to play nice. Instead, I marched straight up to Falcon at full speed, grabbed his giant arm and hauled him outside. ¡°What was that all about?¡± He leaned down a little so the general distance from his mouth to my ear wouldn¡¯t factor out discretion. ¡°If you tell him you jumped, you can forget living, Ara. He¡¯ll cover you with guards twenty-four-seven, and he¡¯ll call David home.¡± ¡°He has a right to know, Falcon. How can he protect me if he doesn¡¯t know what¡¯s going on?¡± ¡°He¡¯s not the one protecting you right now. I am.¡± ¡°He¡¯s my friend.¡± ¡°I know. But when it comes to your safety, that is the very thing clouding his vision. I still don¡¯t know why you jumped or if it might¡¯ve had something to do with David, so I don¡¯t want the king back here until we¡¯ve had a chance to figure it out.¡± We stepped apart as a group of knights walked between us and into the hall, both of us staying quiet until they were well and truly inside and the only noise out here was the gentle summer breeze and the chirping of birds in the trees. ¡°Mike knows you butted in deliberately then, Fal.¡± He nodded. ¡°And I¡¯ll tell him it¡¯s because you were about to say something I didn¡¯t want Quaid and Blade to overhear.¡± I looked at the three of them in the centre of the training hall, laughing loudly like they were trying to hear their own voices over a storm. ¡°They know, don¡¯t they¡ªBlade and Quaid?¡± Falcon nodded. ¡°I briefed them.¡± I folded my arms in, watching the man across the room that I was once so close to¡ªthe man I could trust with anything. ¡°It¡¯s so wrong that you¡¯re leaving Mike out of the loop, Falcon.¡± He looked at Mike, too. ¡°I know. But he¡¯s too close to you, Ara. I believe this is best¡ªand I¡¯ve got ten years of Special Forces training to back my claim.¡± ¡°Special Forces, huh?¡± I elbowed him softly. ¡°Come on.¡± He winked, leading me away with a gentle hand to my shoulder. ¡°Let¡¯s finish up with training for today, then we¡¯ll go to the library and put in a few more hours¡¯ research on the Mark.¡± ¡°M¡¯kay,¡± I said glumly. ¡°If I¡¯m not crippled with a headache after.¡± ¡°Something tells me you¡¯ll be fine.¡± I frowned up at his grin. ¡°What¡¯s that supposed to mean?¡± ¡°Nothing.¡± ¡°Ara?¡± Mike cut in, jogging over. ¡°You¡¯re up first today. We¡¯re gonna do weapons training after dinner instead. I need to make a report on your blue light for David.¡± ¡°Why?¡± Page 41 ¡°He asked about it¡ªsaid his reasons were on a ¡°need to know¡± basis.¡±Advertisement ¡°And you don¡¯t need to know?¡± I asked, winking at him. ¡°Guess not.¡± He backed away. ¡°I think he¡¯s just worried. He said something happened on the beach the other day.¡± He eyed Falcon suspiciously, then asked me, ¡°Anything you wanna share?¡± ¡°Um.¡± My gaze flicked to Falcon, whose face pretty much said ¡®Don¡¯t you dare¡¯. ¡°I¡¯ll check with David first.¡± ¡°Fine with me. So¡ª¡± Mike clapped his hands loudly and looked around the room. ¡°Volunteers?¡± Everyone in the room went dead quiet, half of them casting their gaze to the floor¡ªfifty strapping young lads, shirtless and manly, all cowering before a girl half their size. ¡°Fine.¡± Mike rolled his sleeves up. ¡°I¡¯ll do it.¡± ¡°Mike?¡± I started. ¡°You¡ª¡± He leaned in and cupped my arm. ¡°I¡¯m pretty sure I deserve it, Ara.¡± At first I was confused, until I realised he meant that he deserved the pain for the slap he¡¯d given me. ¡°Fine.¡± I grinned, rubbing my hands together. ¡°Pay back time.¡± He laughed. ¡°Then we¡¯re even, right?¡± ¡°Not even close.¡± I bared my teeth at him. ¡°But I might consider forgiveness if you make me some of your famous brownies later.¡± He shook his head, smiling, and moved to the centre of the room. ¡°Clear the space, everyone.¡± Everyone moved back five paces, giving Mike and I plenty of battleground. ¡°Where would you like me to fire, Mikey?¡± I asked, resting my hands on my knees. ¡°Cause, personally, I¡¯d like to shoot you in the ass.¡± ¡°Ha! Good luck.¡± He turned and offered me a small glimpse of his butt. ¡°This knight is way too quick for¡ªAh!¡± He jolted forward and hit the deck, a rush of blue filling the space around him, as if a glow-worm just farted, retreating back into my fingertips after. The entire room of knights, both vampire and Lilithian, broke into burly laugher, and from the corner of my eye, I saw greenback exchange hands. ¡°Where shall I shoot you next?¡± Mike stumbled to his feet, rubbing his bottom. ¡°Why not aim for the heart?¡± He faced me again. ¡°You did a pretty good job of banging it up last time, maybe you can finish it off.¡± The crowd roared, half with laughter, the other half with a very long ¡°Ooooh.¡± ¡°Heart sounds great,¡± I said, and flicked a bolt of energy toward him, but he ducked to one side and swept under it, charging forward fast before I even realised I hadn¡¯t hit him. I coughed out as I went down on my back, the ground rattling my spine like an iron hammer on a twig. I was sure I even heard something crack. ¡°You okay?¡± Mike leaned back a bit. ¡°Sure,¡± I said in a squeezed voice, using my pain to distract him, then hooked my ankle up and around his chest, forcing him onto the ground as I rose up to pin him flat with both knees. ¡°I¡¯m fine. How are you?¡± He whacked the ground with a flat palm three times, and I eased my kneecap back off his throat. ¡°Sorry, too much?¡± ¡°No way.¡± He shoved me back on my butt and skittered away. ¡°Silly girl. You had me then, were it not for your compassion.¡± I got to my feet and stood ready to take him on, but he waved in three more knights from the sidelines, and the odds suddenly changed in their favour. But I had a new weapon up my sleeve, something none of them could fight if I could just figure out how to use it. ¡°To your right, Majesty,¡± a man called, coming in from my left. I saw him shift before I heard his voice, though, so his attempt to distract me was futile. My fist drove a new path for blood through two bones in his ribs, burning the hole closed with a bolt of blue energy after. He fell to the floor just as knight number two dove into the fray and cupped the side of my face from behind, twisting my neck to the highest point of resistance. I dropped my hand down by my hip and shot him in the balls, logging his screams of horror in my feel-bad-about-it-later thoughts. It wasn¡¯t over yet. We had fifty more knights in here that¡¯d willingly take me down. But it was Mike¡¯s hands that wrapped my waist. ¡°Going for a man¡¯s family jewels, Ara. That¡¯s low. Even for you,¡± he whispered in my ear, then flipped me upside down, dropping me to the floor with one knee on my chest, the other pinning my head by the ponytail. ¡°Yield?¡± ¡°Never.¡± I struggled against him for a second, then pushed a hand into his chest and shot him right through the heart. I smelled the flesh burn, saw it melt as the shock registered in his eyes a second before he flew back. And two knights grabbed me as Mike hit the ground, dragging me to my feet. I yanked my arm from one grip and elbowed the guy in the ribs, swinging my wrist up to his jaw with another jolt of energy. He went down hard, but the knight on my right wasn¡¯t giving in, and the pain in my head slowly grew, strengthening for each shot. This guy was twice my size in both height and weight, and he was a vampire. I had nothing on him physically. But . . . mentally. I focused hard on his arm, feeling my face and hands go hotter, the pain in my head rippling throughout my jaw and neck. My blue light seemed useless against him¡ªthe man wearing it like a Christmas tree parades its candles, and the telekinesis wasn¡¯t working either. I couldn''t find that place in me that¡¯d awakened when I broke Jase¡¯s arm. Maybe it was there, maybe it was afraid to come out again because of how devastated I felt after I hurt Jase. But if the power didn¡¯t surface, I¡¯d lose this battle to a vampire and, in turn, probably lose a lot of respect among the Core. One of us was going down in the next ten-seconds, though, and it wasn¡¯t going to be me. I knew this guy¡¯s strategy: he¡¯d stand there and cop the pain until it got too much for me¡ªuntil I threw the towel in. But he was hurting, too. That much was clear, and if my energy was at full strength like it had been when I first shot Mike, this guy wouldn¡¯t even be standing. But the colour was fading, the light more of a white than a blue. I knew the vampire could take the pain, but I was sure even he had a limit. I brought my hand up to his face and pushed him backward. He fought me for a second, but his weight shifted suddenly and mercifully, and he let go of my arm, stumbling back a few steps. ¡°Get back in there, Phelps!¡± the knights surrounding us called, barking like dogs on the sidelines. I blocked them all out and sent another jolt at the vampire to finish him. He dodged, though, and the pain in my head intensified, rising up my arm. I screamed, caging my head in my arms as I landed on my knees. I had to get up. I couldn¡¯t quit now, not when I was this close. ¡°Ara?¡± Mike called. I turned my head and saw myself in the reflection of his eyes as they met mine¡ªsaw all the fear and amazement he felt inside radiating out of him, right into the deepest part of me. I heard him speak, saw his lips move and even felt him run a finger under my nose, collecting something wet, but the words didn¡¯t really register. My electric hold was locked onto the vampire, and he was going down, come hell or high water. ¡°Ara, stop,¡± Mike yelled, pulling my hand down. ¡°Look at the floor.¡± My eyes drifted away from the lock of an angered gaze at the standing knight, and saw a pool of blood flooding my feet. I wondered how it got there¡ªif someone had been hurt. I wondered why Mike hadn¡¯t called for them to see the nurse. I was about to tell him to do something, tell him to help the person who was bleeding, when Mike¡¯s words shot past me in a mighty growl, ¡°What are you doing here?¡± ¡°Saving her life,¡± Jason said. I felt him touch me¡ªfelt his hands on me, felt the world move under the swaying in my head, but I didn¡¯t see him move me. I didn¡¯t see anything until I felt the grass under my fingertips, Jason pinning my wrists to the ground, holding them there. ¡°Don¡¯t move,¡± he demanded, then looked up at the approaching crowd. ¡°Everyone stay where they are damn well standing, or her head will explode.¡± The earth heated under my hands, like touching a cake fresh from the oven. It smelled like warm clay on a hot summer¡¯s day¡ªthe grass giving off a little smoke. Mike took one step closer and watched on with his mouth agape as the light from my hands went bright white, melting the sand to mud in the cup of my palm, the liquid rising up my arms and through my veins, assimilating the pain in my head, like warm water over cold toes. My spine eased to relaxed, my neck rising from within the safety of my collar bones, and I rocked back on my knees, resting on my sit-bones beside Jason, who held a stern gaze at Mike, one finger still aimed in case my beloved BFF saw fit to interfere. ¡°What. . .¡± I started, breathless, ¡°just happened?¡± Jason laughed. ¡°The pain¡¯s gone?¡± ¡°Yes, that pain¡¯s gone.¡± I pressed three fingertips to my temple. ¡°Where did it go?¡± He laughed again. ¡°It worked. I can¡¯t believe it actually worked.¡± ¡°What worked?¡± He spun me at the shoulders and held them both tight. ¡°I went through a thousand conclusions: that maybe you were a negative terminal of a battery, and the knights you were shooting were positive, causing a short circuit. Then I thought maybe you were what¡¯s known as a ¡®loose circuit,¡¯ because the energy wasn¡¯t passing through a load, but that didn¡¯t really fit, either. And then I came up with what proved to be right.¡± ¡°Which is?¡± ¡°It¡¯s Nature¡¯s energy. You¡¯re drawing it from the earth, and you can use it, but it needs to go back into the earth after.¡± He pushed his dark locks from his face, his smile so radiant you¡¯d think he was a kid at a circus. ¡°When you use it for that purpose, you¡¯re the negative terminal, the knights the load, and the earth the positive.¡± ¡°That doesn¡¯t make a whole lot of sense to me right now,¡± I said with a soft chuckle, ¡°but my head doesn¡¯t hurt, so I don¡¯t really care.¡± He laughed and helped me to my feet. ¡°I¡¯ll show you more about it later. I have an entire report on it, but I gotta write this down before I forget what¡¯s. . .¡± He tapped his head. ¡°There¡¯s a lot going on here. I gotta g¡ª¡± ¡°Ara!¡± Mike pushed in and swathed me like a blanket. ¡°Are you okay?¡± ¡°Yeah,¡± I said, my lungs restrained by the grip of Mike¡¯s loving embrace. ¡°I¡¯ve never seen you fight so hard before,¡± he said, sweeping my hair back. ¡°You really weren¡¯t gonna give up, were you?¡± ¡°What would be the point of it all then, Mike? If I always give up when it gets too hard.¡± He pulled me in again. ¡°I¡¯m so proud of you.¡± ¡°Thanks.¡± I gave him a gentle squeeze then stood back. ¡°But, I have to shoot you now. I wanna see how powerful I am without the pain.¡± Page 42 He cupped both my hands and shook his head. ¡°No way. We need to test you on something not living first.¡±Advertisement ¡°Okay.¡± I looked around. ¡°Any suggestions?¡± ¡°A tree.¡± ¡°Mike?¡± I said flatly. ¡°A tree is living.¡± ¡°Okay, Miss Mother Nature. Fine.¡± He flipped his chin in Ryder¡¯s direction. ¡°Run down the barracks and get a couple of dumpsters, would ya?¡± ¡°Sure thing, boss.¡± Ryder saluted and ran off with five guys in tow. ¡°Here ya go, Chief,¡± a young knight said, waltzing toward us, carrying a boulder the size of a child like it was a box of paper. ¡°Try this while we¡¯re waitin¡¯.¡± ¡°Thanks, Joe.¡± Mike aimed a finger to the centre of the field backing the hall. ¡°Just plonk it right down there.¡± ¡°No worries, sir.¡± He ran off, jolly and spritely, and dropped the boulder, turning to check with us if the position was okay. We both gave him a thumbs-up. ¡°Kay, Ara.¡± Mike jammed his hands in his back pockets and stepped away from me. ¡°Let¡¯s see what you can do.¡± I felt good about it, certain I could explode that morsel of rock with the blast and not end up flat on my back after. I leaned down into my knees a bit, rubbing my hands together. Once upon a time, I needed to use a thought or a feeling to induce the electricity. But now, I could do it on command. I wondered if telekinesis would eventually end up that way for me. In fact, according to Jase¡¯s diary, if I practiced every day, it most certainly would. ¡°Come on, Ara. Quit daydreaming, and shoot it.¡± ¡°Gimme a break.¡± I turned back to look at Mike, flicking just one finger toward the rock so I could watch his face as it exploded unexpectedly. And like I¡¯d imagined the very expression he¡¯d wear, the bottom of his jaw moved an inch apart from the top, and the whites dominated a larger part of his eyes. I didn¡¯t need to see the damage I caused. I heard it¡ªheard an almighty shatter, like lightning splitting the earth, felt the rock debris hit the backs of my legs, saw the wind of the blast rush past and sweep my hair toward Mike, the whole event ending in the shock on his face. I folded over, laughing. ¡°Ara?¡± Mike yanked me quickly to stand. ¡°Are you okay?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I watched realization melt the concern on his face. ¡°You¡¯re laughing, Ara. Why are you laughing?¡± ¡°You should¡¯ve seen the look on your face.¡± ¡°Are you kidding?¡± He grabbed my arm and turned me to face the field. ¡°Did you see what you did? It¡¯s bloody lucky we tested you out on a rock first.¡± I scanned the field for any signs of the boulder, but it¡¯d been obliterated. All that remained was a small group of knights on the other side, each holding a dumpster between them¡ªcompletely frozen in place. ¡°Take the dumpster back,¡± Mike called across to them. ¡°We need something more hardwearing.¡± They nodded once and shuffled away, looking rather relieved. ¡°Well, then.¡± Mike patted my back as if I were one of the boys. ¡°Best you go clean yourself up and fill Jason in.¡± I dusted my shirt off a bit and smudged a large smear of blood away from my chin. ¡°Fill him in?¡± ¡°He¡¯ll wanna know what you just did.¡± ¡°And you approve of that?¡± He flashed a simple smile. ¡°Baby, he just solved one of the biggest problems I¡¯ve had on my mind since this whole thing began. He can have whatever he wants.¡± I jumped onto my toes and wrapped my arms around Mike¡¯s neck. ¡°Thank you, Mike.¡± ¡°Ah, watch the shirt.¡± He pulled me off gently, motioning to my bloodied mess of an outfit. ¡°Sorry.¡± I wiped some of the blood away with my hand, but only smudged it worse. ¡°I¡¯ll go take a shower and come back down later, yeah?¡± ¡°Yeah. And I¡¯ll have the knights run laps through the forest to find you more boulders.¡± ¡°Sounds good.¡± I nodded, then walked away with a huge smile on my face¡ªmy head completely pain free. I lay awake, fully clothed, listening to the clock tick across the room. The manor was a lonely place without the echo of maids cleaning, footmen laying plates or the gentle but distant chatter of House representatives. Trouble was, at this hour it was too late to be night, and too early to be morning. I was stuck halfway between the world of the living and the dreaming. And worse, I couldn¡¯t find the door to either. I stuffed my hand under my bottom and pulled my phone from my back pocket. David still hadn¡¯t called¡ªor messaged. Nothing. If he was gonna fall off the face of the earth, the least he could do was let me know first. Then again, maybe it wasn¡¯t him. Maybe it was me. Perhaps my phone had stopped working somehow and wasn¡¯t receiving calls. But that didn¡¯t explain why my inbox was empty. Not even my dad had replied to my emails, and he promised to tell me how his appointment with the doctor went this week. ¡°Quaid?¡± I whispered. My door popped open and a line of yellow light spilled into the room, licking the wall, then the celling. ¡°What¡¯s up?¡± ¡°Have you got cell service?¡± He lifted his phone from his pocket. ¡°Yup. Why?¡± Of course he did. That wasn¡¯t the problem; that wasn¡¯t the reason David hadn¡¯t called. ¡°Never mind.¡± I turned my face away, and the room went dark again. But my heart leaped into my chest when a very loud, very obnoxious song played suddenly from the device in my hand. I almost dropped it three times trying to run my thumb across the screen to answer the video call. And as the name registered in my head and a face showed, shadowed by an early morning, I ran for my closet and switched on the light, simulating daytime. ¡°Dad?¡± I almost cried, composing myself quickly. ¡°Ara? I hope I haven¡¯t caught you at a bad time.¡± I motioned around my wardrobe. ¡°Nope, just . . . getting dressed.¡± ¡°Heading out late today, huh?¡± He looked at his watch. ¡°Yeah. I had a study period before class,¡± I lied. ¡°How¡¯s things over there? You never emailed me back.¡± Dad looked at my face for a long moment. ¡°And you were worried?¡± I nodded. There was a very slight delay in my movements from action to the screen, but Dad didn¡¯t seem to notice. He looked as though he¡¯d just woken up¡ªstill in his plain tee and pyjama pants, a coffee by his elbow and the kitchen all kind of dark around him. ¡°Well, we¡¯re all fine here, honey,¡± he assured me. ¡°I had my appointment with the cardiologist on Thursday, and he¡¯s adjusted my medication. Says I¡¯ll be fine.¡± ¡°You don¡¯t look fine, Dad. You look . . . old.¡± He laughed. ¡°Oh, there¡¯s that brutal honesty I missed.¡± ¡°Is that Ara?¡± Vicki said, gliding into the room. Her face lit up when she saw mine. ¡°Ara, how are you? We¡¯ve missed you so much. What are you doing up so early? It must be, like¡ª¡± ¡°Eleven a.m., Vicki.¡± I plonked down on the ottoman by the shoe rack. ¡°Oh, right, you¡¯re ahead of us in Paris.¡± She sat down beside Dad. ¡°You look well,¡± she said, but it was a lie; even I could see how pale and grainy I looked on the screen. ¡°Your face has really rounded out since you left.¡± ¡°Oh, great.¡± I rolled my eyes. ¡°Is that Mom-talk for ¡®you¡¯re getting fat¡¯?¡± ¡°No, dear. You look healthy, for once. Not that skinny little kid that left us a few months ago. They must be feeding you well.¡± I drew my stomach in and readjusted my jeans. Maybe they were feeding me a little too well. ¡°Yeah. Food here is good. How¡¯s Sam?¡± ¡°He¡¯s good. He got a dog,¡± Vicki said. ¡°A dog?¡± I looked at Dad. ¡°You said we could never¡ª¡± ¡°He doesn¡¯t have a dog,¡± Dad said, his hand entering the conversation. ¡°He¡¯s got a follower, and that¡¯s it. He¡¯s not keeping it.¡± ¡°Whose dog is it?¡± I asked. ¡°We don¡¯t know. It hasn¡¯t got tags or even a chip,¡± Vicki said. ¡°It¡¯s this great monstrosity of a thing,¡± she added. ¡°White, fluffy, drools way too much.¡± Dad turned his head and frowned at her. ¡°I¡¯ve never seen it drool.¡± ¡°It licked my face the other day,¡± she said, insulted. ¡°I had to take a shower.¡± ¡°Now, I don¡¯t think that¡¯s necessar¡ª¡± ¡°So the dog decided to make a home with Sam?¡± I cut in. ¡°For now. It¡¯s not staying, though,¡± Vicki said. ¡°How often does it come by?¡± ¡°Mostly on weekends.¡± ¡°The dog knows the days of the week?¡± I asked drily. Vicki nodded and shrugged at the same time. ¡°Sam must be feeding it something really good then.¡± Vicki laughed. ¡°Well, I don¡¯t mind. The silly-looking thing helps with the laundry.¡± ¡°You¡¯re kidding,¡± I said absently, my mind going off on a tangent. A big, white, fluffy dog that helps with laundry. That was no stray. ¡°Helper or not, Sam knows the rules about dogs.¡± Dad stood up. ¡°I don¡¯t mind him having it here for now, as long as he looks after it, and it doesn¡¯t eat my azaleas.¡± I laughed. ¡°I don¡¯t think Petey will¡ª¡± Dad stopped half way between the kitchen and the table, and turned around. ¡°How¡¯d you know its name?¡± ¡°Um.¡± I bit my lip. ¡°Vicki said Petey.¡± ¡°I did.¡± She looked utterly confused. ¡°Um, yeah. So, anyway. . .¡± I hesitated. ¡°Dad, can I talk to you alone for a minute?¡± He and Vicki exchanged long glances, then she stood up and slowly left the room. But I was sure she¡¯d parked herself just around the corner. I didn¡¯t care, though. As long as she stayed out of this conversation. ¡°What¡¯s up, honey?¡± He sat back down, angling the screen so I now looked onto the wall, which only confirmed that Vicki was standing right there, listening. ¡°Am I adopted?¡± Dad¡¯s eyes shot past the screen, coming back again a little wetter and sharper than before. He slowly breathed out and lined his fingers together under his chin. ¡°Why do you ask?¡± ¡°Just . . . just answer me, Dad.¡± The reflection of his eyes showed Vicki¡¯s face just before she appeared. She sat down beside him again and took his hand: the united front, ready for something it seemed they¡¯d been prepared for for a long time. ¡°Yes, Ara,¡± Vicki said for him. ¡°You¡¯re adopted.¡± Finally, some truths. I had to choose which role to play then: the shocked daughter; the angry teen who resented her adoptive parents, or the real me that just wanted to tell Dad not to worry so much¡ªthat it was okay. ¡°Why didn¡¯t you ever tell me?¡± I asked. Page 43 ¡°To . . . there was just never a good time,¡± Dad said.Advertisement ¡°Well, now¡¯s a good time.¡± Vicki stood. ¡°I¡¯ll leave you both to it.¡± ¡°Thank you, Vicki.¡± Dad patted her hand and turned back to face me. ¡°I¡¯ve wanted to tell you, Ara.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t doubt that, Dad.¡± ¡°I just . . . after I left your mom, she forbid me to tell you. She thought you¡¯d want to leave her and find your, what she called, ¡°real parents¡±. Not that she felt that way, but she thought you would. We planned to tell you once you turned eighteen, but¡ª¡± ¡°But you couldn¡¯t do it.¡± ¡°Not after everything that happened.¡± ¡°Everything? What do you mean?¡± The way he said that sentence made me think for a second that he knew about Drake arresting and torturing me. ¡°You know, Mom dying and you moving here¡ªall that heartache, then breaking up with Mike. I didn¡¯t want to complicate things further.¡± I nodded. ¡°And, you know, I appreciate that, Dad.¡± ¡°Really? ¡°Yeah. I¡¯m not sure I could''ve coped with the truth then, but . . . I can now.¡± ¡°Okay then.¡± He leaned forward, propping his elbows on the table. ¡°What would you like to know?¡± ¡°Her name. My mom¡¯s name.¡± He smiled fondly. ¡°Her name was Rose.¡± ¡°Was?¡± ¡°Sadly, honey, she passed away giving birth to you.¡± My mouth opened as if I knew what to say, but I didn¡¯t. I just stared at Dad¡¯s face, waiting for him to speak. ¡°She was just a child when she had you, Ara, sixteen, actually¡ª¡± ¡°Sixteen?¡± ¡°Yes. She thought she was in love with this boy, and they . . . well, you know how it goes. Nine months later, you were born.¡± ¡°So, well, how did you come to adopt me? I mean, did you know Rose?¡± ¡°Rose was. . .¡± He looked down. ¡°She was my baby sister, charged to my care after my mother passed away.¡± Sister? I never even knew he had a sister. ¡°Did my mom know her, too?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± He smiled fondly. ¡°Rose and Eleanor were close, you know. Eleanor was the support Rose needed then. I just . . . I was a guy. I just didn¡¯t know what to do with a pregnant sixteen-year-old.¡± ¡°So, then. . .¡± I just felt more confused about it all. ¡°Did you plan to adopt me all along, or was that forced on you after Rose died?¡± ¡°It was never forced on us, Ara.¡± He shook his head impatiently. ¡°It was our choice. Rose planned to raise you herself. But. . .¡± ¡°But she died.¡± ¡°And you became our little blessing.¡± I truly believed him as he said that. I could tell from his voice that no matter how much pain I¡¯d brought him, there had always been more joy. ¡°Did Rose ever get to hold me?¡± He nodded. ¡°For a while. You were nearly a month early, so we all knew you might not survive, but we never imagined we¡¯d lose Rose.¡± ¡°How did it happen? How do people just die from giving birth, Dad?¡± ¡°We don¡¯t know.¡± ¡°How can you not know?¡± I asked, getting louder. ¡°She was in a car accident, honey, and went into early labour. She didn¡¯t have any major injuries, so they let her give birth naturally. And . . . when you were born, this pretty little blue baby, and Rose held your tiny little hand, the reality of it hit her harder than we imagined.¡± He shook his head. ¡°Some say she died of a broken heart¡ªthat she couldn¡¯t live in a world where her baby was dead.¡± ¡°But I lived!¡± ¡°Yes. And I wish she¡¯d known that.¡± ¡°So, if she¡¯d held on just a few more seconds¡ª¡± ¡°We don¡¯t know, Ara. No one can know God¡¯s plan,¡± he said softly in the ¡®dad¡¯ tone that always made things feel better. ¡°But I think she knew, deep inside, that you¡¯d survive.¡± ¡°Why? How?¡± ¡°Because she looked me right in the eye that day and asked me to take care of you and, a second later, she slipped away and you started crying.¡± I couldn¡¯t breathe. I sat with my lips slightly parted, picturing it all. ¡°Eleanor came back in and she wrapped you up and kissed Rose on the head, promised she would never let you go.¡± My shaky hand moved to cover my mouth. ¡°So, we adopted you. But Eleanor and I . . . we. . .¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°We were never really together, Ara.¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°We made a pact to raise you as our own. But we weren¡¯t married. She changed her name so all three of us shared the same surname, and I loved her, Ara. I loved Eleanor like my own family. But not like a husband loves a wife.¡± ¡°It was Eleanor who gave you your second name¡ªRose,¡± Vicki said softly, sitting down beside Dad again. ¡°She wanted you to always carry a part of your mother.¡± ¡°And. . .¡± I took a jagged breath and steadied my tears. ¡°Who¡¯s my father?¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Ara.¡± Dad shook his head. ¡°I went to find him a few years ago, but all I found was his sister Mavis. She told me he¡¯d been deployed to Iraq after nine-eleven, and was killed in the line of duty.¡± Dad hung his head. ¡°He never made it home.¡± The reality sunk through me, dragging my body into the ground. I was too late. If I¡¯d found out when I was younger, I might have at least seen my father, even once, and the weight of the unknown came down on me hard, undoing all the hopes I had for future where I knew him. How was that possibly fair? ¡°What was his name?¡± I asked, pressing my thumb to my chin to stop it shaking. ¡°Hayden Matthews, and he looked. . .¡± Dad smiled, but his eyes held all the sadness of things gone by. ¡°He looked very much like you.¡± ¡°Dark hair?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Blue eyes?¡± ¡°No.¡± His smile warmed. ¡°Those were from Rose.¡± ¡°And . . . you say you¡¯re her brother?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± He nodded, and I almost believed him, save for the fact that David told me this man, who I called my father, had a ¡®distant¡¯ ancestral connection to me. Certainly not close enough to be my uncle. ¡°Were . . . were you her adopted brother?¡± His eyes narrowed. ¡°Why would you ask that?¡± I turned away. ¡°Ara, honey. Look at me.¡± My eyes shifted sideways. Dad¡¯s arm was right in direct line of the camera. I knew his hand was against the screen¡ªtrying to reach out to me. ¡°I know that everything you thought you knew about yourself has just fallen apart, but I love you, and I¡ª¡± ¡°I love you, too, Dad.¡± I placed my fingertips to the screen. ¡°I¡¯ve just got so much going on right now. I . . . I don¡¯t know how to cope with it all. And I¡¯m not mad at you. I¡¯m not upset. I just. . .¡± ¡°You just need a hug?¡± I nodded, wiping my cheeks. ¡°Where¡¯s David?¡± Vicki asked. ¡°He should really be here for this.¡± ¡°He¡¯s away on business,¡± I said, sobbing. ¡°And I can¡¯t get hold of him.¡± ¡°Why?¡± Dad asked, his tone flooding with worry. ¡°He¡¯s just not answering his phone.¡± ¡°Did you have a fight?¡± Vicki asked. I shook my head. ¡°But things aren¡¯t okay, are they?¡± Dad said. I shook my head again. ¡°Dad? I . . . was anyone in my family ever. . .¡± ¡°Ever?¡± he prompted. ¡°Infertile.¡± He sat back in his chair, looking at Vicki. ¡°Honey, are you trying to have a baby?¡± I didn''t even have time to speak; Vicki butted in with, ¡°Ara, you''re too young. You''re barely¡ª¡± ¡°I know how old I am, Vicki, and I don''t mean to sound nasty, but it¡¯s not up to you.¡± ¡°Why would you want a baby, Ara?¡± Dad asked. ¡°You¡¯ve only just married, and¡ª¡± ¡°David¡¯s going to die,¡± I said, and my eyes went wide around my shock. I didn''t mean to say that, but it just slipped out. I guess I just needed to tell someone¡ªneeded someone to know how helpless and scared I felt all the time. But as I looked into both Dad and Vicki¡¯s mortified faces, I wished I hadn¡¯t said it. ¡°I''m so sorry, Ara.¡± Vicki reached out and touched the screen. ¡°Is it cancer?¡± I looked at Dad, swallowing the lump in my throat. ¡°I . . . yeah,¡± I said, because I wasn¡¯t sure they¡¯d understand if I told them he was going to kill a vampire to void an ancient contract. ¡°Oh, Ara.¡± Vicki burst into tears. ¡°I''m just so, so sorry.¡± ¡°How long?¡± Dad asked, broken inside but composed outside, as he always was. ¡°A few months.¡± I wiped my nose, sniffling. ¡°We were hoping to have the happy news of a baby before he¡­¡± My voice broke. Dad sighed, lowering his head into his hands. ¡°It¡¯ll be all right, Ara,¡± Vicki said, rubbing Dad¡¯s back. ¡°Why do people always say that?¡± I buried my face too. ¡°You know it won''t. He''s going to die. And we can''t even fall pregnant. What if it¡¯s me, Dad?¡± He looked up. ¡°What if it¡¯s something wrong with me? That means I ruined his only chance to know he was gonna be a dad before he. . .¡± I stared at the wall for a second. ¡°There¡¯s nothing after this for him. He doesn''t get to go on. He¡¯ll be gone, and I wanted him to know he was going to have a little girl before he went.¡± ¡°Oh, Ara, please don¡¯t think that way,¡± Vicki said. I could see how badly she just wanted to hold me, but we were divided by what they thought was thousands of miles. ¡°It¡¯ll happen. I¡¯ll pray for it everyday, I promise. You¡¯ll have your little baby before he dies.¡± ¡°If prayers could make me fall pregnant, Vicki, I already would be. But I just don¡¯t think I¡¯m meant to be a mom.¡± Dad reached out and touched the screen again. ¡°Maybe you should come home for a bit. It might¡ª¡± ¡°I can''t do that, Dad. We have a life here. We have friends and responsibilities.¡± ¡°But you have family here,¡± Vicki reasoned. ¡°I have family here, too,¡± I said softly. ¡°David can¡¯t leave, and it¡¯d break his heart if I did.¡± Vicki exhaled; I could see the loss of hope in her eyes. Neither her nor Dad knew what to say or what to do. And right on time, as if it were a bell to save me from further explanation, my phone grizzled, making a fuss, the caller ID swallowing Dad and Vicki¡¯s faces. Page 44 ¡°Is that David?¡± Vicki asked, clearly noticed my eyes light up. ¡°Yeah. I gotta go.¡± I held my finger over the button to accept the call. ¡°I really need to take this.¡±Advertisement ¡°Okay, call us back later, Ara, or we¡¯ll worry,¡± Vicki said. I nodded, offering my most reassuring smile. ¡°I¡¯m okay, you know.¡± ¡°We know, honey,¡± Dad said. ¡°We¡¯ll talk later.¡± ¡°Bye.¡± I ended their call and put David to my ear. ¡°David!¡± ¡°Hey, sweetheart. You called?¡± ¡°Only like fifty-thousand times.¡± ¡°Oh, come on now, it wasn¡¯t that many,¡± he said playfully. ¡°It was more like¡ª¡± ¡°Mom and Dad called,¡± I interrupted. ¡°Ah, good. And how are they?¡± ¡°I told them you have cancer.¡± ¡°Why?¡± he said slowly, dragging the word out. ¡°It kind of slipped out that you¡¯re gonna die. And I had to make up some comprehensible explanation. I mean, they picked up on my extreme sadness anyway.¡± The silence on the other end of the line lasted too long. ¡°You''re sad?¡± ¡°Is that a joke?¡± ¡°No. I just thought, for the sake of appearances, you¡¯d suck that up around your parents.¡± ¡°Suck it up? Suck it up! David, would you suck it up? Would you¡ª¡± ¡°Okay. I''m sorry.¡± His voice got louder. ¡°Just . . . don¡¯t yell at me. I really don¡¯t want to fight with you.¡± I released my fury with a groan. ¡°Sorry.¡± ¡°No, I''m sorry, okay. I just . . . what¡¯d they say?¡± ¡°They were devastated.¡± ¡°Really?¡± ¡°Yes! They love you, David. They want to do anything they can to help.¡± He laughed. ¡°Aw, I really wish we could tell them the truth. Actually, I kinda wish your dad was a vampire.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°You know how he always has that way of solving problems¡ªor making you feel like they can be solved?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I smiled. ¡°I bet he¡¯d have some clever way we could fix this Drake contract.¡± ¡°Yeah, and I bet you¡¯d actually listen to him.¡± ¡°As opposed to whom?¡± he asked. ¡°Me.¡± ¡°I do listen to you.¡± ¡°Huh! You so do not.¡± ¡°Okay, maybe my track record isn¡¯t that great. But you gotta admit things have gotten better lately.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± But they¡¯d be better if he was actually here, with me. ¡°I thought about it, you know,¡± he said after a while. ¡°About what?¡± ¡°Turning him¡ªyour dad.¡± ¡°Really?¡± ¡°Yeah. I think we should discuss it. I think, even if he couldn¡¯t find a way out of our situation, at least he¡¯d be here to take care of you¡ªfor eternity.¡± ¡°I¡¯m not a little girl, anymore, David. I don¡¯t need an eternal dad,¡± I snapped, then calmed myself. ¡°But, I mean, it¡¯d be nice if I didn¡¯t have to bury him one day.¡± ¡°Okay, well, we¡¯ll discuss it further when I get home.¡± I nodded. ¡°I''m worried about his heart, though. He looks sick, you know. And he¡¯s playing it cool, but¡ª¡± ¡°He¡¯ll be fine. If he gets worse, I¡¯ll turn him myself.¡± I smiled. ¡°But you don''t know the secret of how to turn a human.¡± ¡°Don''t I?¡± ¡°Do you?¡± ¡°This is getting off topic.¡± ¡°It is? Because I don''t remember setting a topic for discussion,¡± I said playfully. He cleared his throat. ¡°How¡¯s training?¡± ¡°Great. Now.¡± ¡°Why now?¡± ¡°Because Jason saved my head from exploding yesterday.¡± ¡°What? How?¡± ¡°Things got . . . bad.¡± I shivered at the memory. ¡°Jason comes bursting in, grabs me and hauls me outside and, no joke, as soon as he puts my hands in the ground, like, forces them into the soil, the pain stops.¡± ¡°You''re kidding?¡± ¡°Nope. He said I need to ground my power, and added something about closed circuits, or whatever.¡± ¡°How did he come up with that?¡± ¡°He¡¯s been thinking a lot about it. Guess he had an epiphany.¡± ¡°That¡¯s . . . I gotta admit, I don¡¯t know much about science, but that was pretty clever.¡± ¡°And that''s why I want him to have a lab, David. He can help me. You don''t know how much stress he''s taken off my shoulders by figuring out why I''m getting those headaches.¡± ¡°You were stressed about it?¡± ¡°Of course I was. How would you feel if you had to put yourself in that kind of pain every second day, and no one was going to help you¡­and no one cared? You all just told me to get over it, but he never stopped thinking about it¡ªresearching it.¡± He took a really long breath and let it out right into the mouthpiece of the phone. ¡°Fine. Okay.¡± ¡°What¡¯s okay?¡± ¡°You can have the lab¡ª¡± ¡°What?¡± I jumped up and out of my seat. ¡°But, it comes with a huge but.¡± ¡°I¡¯m okay with a but.¡± ¡°I want a guard with you at all times when you¡¯re together. Do you think you can handle that?¡± ¡°Yes. Oh, David, thank you. He¡¯ll be so happy when I tell him. I wish you were here right now so I could kiss you.¡± ¡°I''m smiling just thinking about it.¡± I smiled too. ¡°And¡­¡± he added. ¡°And?¡± ¡°I want full reports on everything he''s doing with you, and why.¡± ¡°Sure. Of course. I know he won''t have any problem with that.¡± ¡°All right then. Go see Walt and tell him to set up an account for Jason.¡± ¡°Okay. Thanks, David.¡± ¡°Right. And just remember, Ara, I''m doing this for you, not him. I want answers, and I want to see something concrete by the time I get back.¡± ¡°But that doesn¡¯t give us much time. You''re coming back Sunday, right?¡± ¡°I was. But, things¡­¡± He sighed. ¡°Things are bad here.¡± ¡°Why? What happened?¡± ¡°I need to transport a few prisoners to the Vampiric Institution for the Insane.¡± I covered my mouth. ¡°What happened to them?¡± ¡°It¡¯s . . . the vampire mind is still very human. There¡¯s only so much one person can handle before they . . . well, before they lose it.¡± I waited for a second, tense, feeling a kind of energy in David¡¯s voice that made me wonder if one of those prisoners was. . . ¡°Is Pepper one of them?¡± He coughed, then cleared his throat. ¡°I¡¯m not at liberty to discuss the prisoners, Ara.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because I don¡¯t want to.¡± ¡°Did she go nuts because of what you did, or was it something after that¡ª¡± ¡°Have fun setting up the lab, Ara. I¡¯ll talk to you tomorrow.¡± I went to speak, but he hung up the phone, and all the things I wanted to tell him about my birth parents suddenly went on hold, boiling up like bad news, making me so mad not to be able to get it all out. I opened messages on my phone and wrote: Just thought you might like to know that I found out about my birth mother. She''s dead. So is my father. As soon as I pressed send, though, I felt worse. The phone rang a second later. ¡°Ara.¡± ¡°David. I''m sorry. That was really petty of me, I¡ª¡± ¡°No, my love. I''m sorry. I shouldn¡¯t have hung up on you.¡± ¡°It¡¯s okay. You''ve told me not to ask about Pepper. I should respect that.¡± ¡°No, you shouldn¡¯t. You''re my wife and you do have a right to know, but I . . . Ara, I did that to her,¡± he said, his voice shaking, ¡°and I¡¯m dead ashamed of myself.¡± I held still in case the door to his emotions slammed shut in my face. I wasn¡¯t sure what to say or how to move this conversation forward without forcing him back into his shell. ¡°When . . . um . . . when was the last time you saw her?¡± ¡°About a year or so before I met you.¡± ¡°Was she . . . like that then?¡± ¡°Not as bad.¡± ¡°Then you didn¡¯t do it to her, David.¡± I practically laughed with relief. ¡°Maybe time has, or . . . I don¡¯t know. But you shouldn¡¯t blame yourself.¡± ¡°Thanks, Ara. You¡¯re sweet to say that, but you don¡¯t know the full story.¡± ¡°I would if you¡¯d tell me.¡± ¡°One day. Maybe.¡± I nodded, even though he couldn¡¯t see it. One day, maybe, was good enough for me. ¡°So, how do you know she¡¯s insane? Like, what did she say to you when you saw her?¡± ¡°That¡¯s just it. She didn¡¯t even recognize me.¡± ¡°At all?¡± ¡°She was too busy peeling her own skin back and eating it to notice anything other than a passing rat she could mutilate.¡± I let out a shaky breath. ¡°David, I¡¯m so sorry.¡± ¡°It is what it is. So. . .¡± His tone changed, taking the subject with it. ¡°Your dad told you about Rose?¡± ¡°Yes. Wait. I never mentioned her name.¡± ¡°I know. I''ve known about her for a while. I was waiting until I had news of a nice family somewhere out there waiting to meet you before I said anything, but . . . I never found anything on your biological father.¡± ¡°I''m okay, you know. I still have my dad and Vicki.¡± ¡°And me.¡± ¡°For a while.¡± ¡°Yes, but I''m still here, and I love you, and I''m sorry we¡¯ve fought today.¡± ¡°Me too. I hate fighting.¡± ¡°Me too.¡± After a long silence, with me lost trying to think of something else to say to keep him on the line, he said, ¡°Ara?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°I have to go. I¡¯ll call you tomorrow, okay?¡± ¡°Okay,¡± I whispered. ¡°Love you.¡± ¡°Love you, sweetheart.¡± Chapter Nine ¡°Jase.¡± I leaped off the last step and ran into his arms at full speed, well, full human speed. He caught me gracefully, gave me a quick squeeze, and placed me gently back on the ground. ¡°You¡¯re awfully cheery today, Ara. What¡¯s up?¡± ¡°He went for it, Jase. I don''t know if it was just pure luck or if David woke up on the right side of bed, but he approved it.¡± I stood back, swiping my hair from my face. Page 45 ¡°Approved what?¡±Advertisement ¡°Your lab, silly!¡± His eyes narrowed, his brows forming two lines in the middle, just like David when he was utterly confused. ¡°When?¡± ¡°I talked to him on the phone this morning, then I went to see Walt to get the budget plan. Jase, you have the full backing of the House, and an unlimited budget.¡± He laughed. ¡°Really?¡± ¡°Mm-hm.¡± ¡°Ara, that¡¯s. . .¡± He scratched his head, still looking a little mixed by his emotions. ¡°That¡¯s great!¡± ¡°I know, right?¡± I tapped his arm once. ¡°There¡¯s a condition, though.¡± ¡°What¡¯s that?¡± ¡°I have to have a guard present whenever we¡¯re researching or training.¡± ¡°That''s¡ª¡± He nodded, smiling. ¡°Yeah, that''s more than fine. More than fine.¡± ¡°I knew you''d say that.¡± I clapped once, bouncing on my toes. ¡°We have to celebrate.¡± He grinned. ¡°And I know just the place to go.¡± ¡°Out on the town?¡± I joked. ¡°Better.¡± He patted my arm as he walked past. ¡°Have everyone meet at the lighthouse tonight.¡± ¡°Ooh, lighthouse party.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± He walked backward, the reality clearly having sunken in to his smile. ¡°It¡¯s a tradition around these parts.¡± ¡°To celebrate on a lighthouse?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± He started up the stairs. ¡°And tell Blade he better be there.¡± ¡°I will.¡± I watched him disappear into the second floor corridor, then turned to look back at Falcon, who was standing inconspicuously in the shadows nearby. ¡°You coming, Fal?¡± He stepped forward, his hands clasped in front. ¡°You¡¯ll understand if I don¡¯t.¡± ¡°So, you don¡¯t approve.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t say I do.¡± ¡°Of what? The lab or the party?¡± He cleared his throat. ¡°Blade¡¯s in the library, preparing for your lesson on royal popularity, if you¡¯re looking for him.¡± ¡°Right.¡± I nodded once. ¡°I get it. You don¡¯t approve of either.¡± ¡°Only because both situations put you in position to end up in trouble.¡± ¡°Blade will be there tonight, and you¡¯ll be there at every training session.¡± ¡°I wish I could say that gives me comfort.¡± ¡°Well¡ª¡± I turned away. ¡°It¡¯s too bad, Falcon. If David agrees, you can bloody-well get over it.¡± ¡°Yes, Your Majesty,¡± he said resolutely, following me up the stairs. I wished I could tell him to go away. He¡¯d made me mad now, and I really didn¡¯t even want to be in the same space as him. In my old life, I could¡¯ve stormed off and slammed my bedroom door, but this version of me had to wear any disdain under her sleeve and express only composure. It sucked. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Ara.¡± I stopped and angled my neck slowly to see Falcon. He¡¯d stopped about six paces behind me, hanging his head. ¡°What for?¡± ¡°You have every right to celebrate this. What happened at training the other day was spectacular, and if it weren¡¯t for Jason, it wouldn¡¯t have happened.¡± I walked down a few steps and stood on the one just above him so we were almost the same height. ¡°Look, I respect you, Falcon. A lot. And I. . .¡± I thought about it for a second. ¡°Your support would mean a lot to me, you know.¡± He looked up, his face swapping the sternness for a smile. ¡°I support the result. Just not so much the process.¡± ¡°Then you¡¯ll come to the party tonight?¡± He laughed. ¡°I can¡¯t say I¡¯ll go that far, but I won¡¯t stop you from going.¡± ¡°Well, I didn¡¯t think you would.¡± He wet his lips, nodding. ¡°I was planning to.¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°Come on.¡± He walked ahead of me. ¡°Let¡¯s go find Blade and tell him the good news.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t believe you were going to stop me.¡± ¡°Hang on.¡± He cordoned me off from the last step with the back of his forearm. I stopped abruptly against his sleeve. ¡°Why are we hanging on?¡± ¡°Em and Mike are in there.¡± He nodded to the Great Hall. ¡°So?¡± ¡°So, they¡¯re arguing.¡± ¡°Are we listening in?¡± I asked with a laugh. ¡°No.¡± He lowered his arm. ¡°We¡¯re respectfully not trespassing.¡± ¡°But we¡¯re going to the library.¡± ¡°And if we walk past now, they might think we heard them.¡± ¡°So what if we do? They should take their business somewhere private.¡± I shoved past Falcon and nearly tumbled backward down the step as Emily flew past us suddenly, her face in her hands. ¡°Em?¡± I called, but she evaporated. ¡°You okay?¡± Falcon asked. ¡°Yeah.¡± I let go of the railing and dusted myself off. ¡°She was in a real hurry.¡± Falcon looked over his shoulder. ¡°Trouble in paradise.¡± ¡°So it would seem.¡± I considered the doors to the Great Hall for a second. ¡°I¡¯m gonna go see if Mike¡¯s okay.¡± Falcon nodded once and fell back into guard mode behind me. The lone figure sitting at the right hand of the king¡¯s chair didn¡¯t notice Falcon and I on the balcony above him. His head was in his hands, his troubles somewhere on the ground between his feet. I tiptoed down the curvy staircase, my hand tracing the railing and, once at the bottom, appeared at vamp speed beside him. ¡°Mike?¡± He lifted his head and our eyes met. I expected to see tears, but he just looked worn. ¡°Hey, Ara.¡± ¡°What just happened? Emily all but caused a tornado on her way outta here.¡± He sighed and his brow landed against his thumb, his elbow on his knee. ¡°I can¡¯t do it anymore.¡± ¡°Do what?¡± ¡°This business with Emily.¡± He sat tall again. ¡°Ever since she left university and moved here, she¡¯s been really needy and whiney. I just. . .¡± ¡°She¡¯s probably just bored. I¡¯ll assign her a task other than council member. Maybe she¡ª¡± ¡°She gave me back the ring.¡± ¡°What?¡± I screeched. ¡°She gave it back to me¡ªlast night. She just walked up and said she was done, that she didn¡¯t want to get married anymore.¡± ¡°Oh, Mike.¡± I sat down in David¡¯s chair. ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± Mike spun around to face me, tucking his legs under the table. ¡°I mean, she took it back this morning¡ªshe was over it, you know, whatever made her break up with me. But¡ª¡± ¡°But?¡± ¡°But I didn¡¯t want her to take it back.¡± ¡°Why?¡± I reached out and wound my fingers in the ball of his fist. ¡°I¡¯m exhausted, to be honest, Ara. And I think maybe I jumped into a relationship too soon after we broke it off. I just¡ª¡± He leaned back in the chair and looked up at the roof. ¡°I just need some time to clear my head.¡± I nodded. ¡°She¡¯ll understand.¡± ¡°Well, she didn¡¯t.¡± He presented the room, aiming his hand off to the path Emily had taken in haste. ¡°She ditched the ring at my head.¡± I tried not to laugh. ¡°She did?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± He looked around the floor for a second. ¡°I don¡¯t even know where it landed. For all I know, with a throw like that, it went through twenty-odd walls and ended up in the library.¡± I laughed then. So much for sensitivity. ¡°We¡¯ll find it.¡± ¡°I know.¡± He nodded. ¡°But she¡¯s not getting it back this time, Ara. I¡¯m done.¡± ¡°You¡¯re ending it?¡± ¡°No.¡± He stood up. ¡°She ended it.¡± ¡°Mike?¡± I started, but he walked from the room, and I just watched, deciding then that inviting him to our lighthouse celebration was a bad idea, especially considering how much he hated Jason. ¡°This party is getting smaller and smaller,¡± I said to Falcon. ¡°I¡¯m sure Emily will go.¡± I looked up to where he stood on the balcony of the second floor. ¡°Can you go ask her?¡± ¡°Of course.¡± He bowed and turned away. Nate headed out of the library as I waltzed in, and he flashed a quick grin, holding up the latest book he borrowed, then hurried off before I could ask him about the party. I knew he¡¯d come, though, without question. ¡°Blade,¡± I called into the open space, searching up, down, and around with my entire body. The curtains were drawn across the great windows, the room dark and empty. I noticed the projector set up on a table across from a whiteboard, and a stack of notes beside it, but Blade was nowhere to be seen. ¡°Blade? You here?¡± ¡°Hey, Ara.¡± My eyes moved quickly to the bookcases under the balcony, landing on a hunched figure in the armchair. It was so dark that if he hadn¡¯t spoken, even my vampire night vision wouldn¡¯t have noticed him. ¡°Why are we sitting in the dark?¡± I asked, wandering over. He smiled up at me where I sat on the arm of the chair. ¡°You spoken to Em today?¡± ¡°No, but I heard about her and Mike.¡± He stood up, the leather squeaking behind him. ¡°She loves him, you know?¡± ¡°I know.¡± ¡°Why doesn¡¯t he get it? It¡¯s so simple.¡± He stopped with both hands propping him up against the oak table. ¡°She just wants his affection, his love, maybe a little attention. It¡¯s like he doesn¡¯t want her, Ara, like he keeps her all to himself because he wants to prove he¡¯s really gotten over you.¡± ¡°He has.¡± I stood, too. ¡°Emily¡¯s not his trophy girlfriend, Blade. He loves her.¡± ¡°Not enough. Not enough to have asked her to marry him.¡± ¡°Why so sensitive about this?¡± ¡°She¡¯s my friend, Ara. I care about her.¡± I laughed in the back of my throat. ¡°Does . . . does she know you¡¯re all cut up about this?¡± He dropped his hand from his head and looked at me disapprovingly. ¡°I¡¯m not all cut up.¡± I smiled, and it made him smile, too. ¡°Then why can¡¯t I feel the pulse of our bind¡ªyour never-ending-Curse-of-Lilith-love that you¡¯ve had for me all these months?¡± I teased. ¡°Shut up,¡± he said with a grin and sat down on the chair. ¡°Oh God. Why can¡¯t I fall for someone who isn¡¯t taken by a high-ranking member of my new society?¡± I laughed and sat down beside him. ¡°Now, what fun would that be?¡± He bumped me softly with his elbow. ¡°Well, all jokes aside, and no disrespect but, I¡¯m glad I don¡¯t love you anymore.¡± Page 46 I leaned my head on his shoulder. ¡°Me too, Blade. And, hey, bright side?¡± I sat up again. ¡°She¡¯ll be at the party tonight.¡±Advertisement ¡°Party?¡± I paused for dramatic effect. ¡°We got approval for the lab.¡± ¡°What?¡± I just smiled and continued. ¡°We¡¯re going to the lighthouse to eat and drink in celebration. Jason told me to make sure you were coming.¡± ¡°He knows I¡¯d never miss it.¡± ¡°Yeah, and you have to come anyway. I need a guard.¡± ¡°Lemme guess,¡± he said flatly. ¡°Falcon doesn¡¯t approve of you hanging out with Jason.¡± ¡°Not really.¡± ¡°They all need to give that guy a break.¡± He pushed the chair out with the backs of his legs and stood up again. ¡°I¡¯ve never seen anything but the good he¡¯s done for you since he¡¯s been here.¡± ¡°I know. But I guess they just find it hard to forgive what he did in the past.¡± ¡°Yet they praise the king for more heinous actions.¡± ¡°It¡¯s just the way it is.¡± I shrugged. ¡°Well, I got his back, Ara, you know that, right?¡± ¡°I know.¡± ¡°Good.¡± He clapped once. ¡°Then we have a lesson to get started on.¡± The global view from the rooftop spread my little world outward, but the sight of the new greenhouse narrowed it in again, stealing the glamour from the winding beige roads, the unending fields of green grass, and the vast clusters of trees. I half expected it to be a modest, kind of rounded conservatory, the glass maybe frosted and opaque, but I was dead wrong. I was wrong about the rooftop, too. In my mind, I¡¯d pictured a grey, water-damaged cement surface, cluttered up with blackened chimneystacks and broken roof tiles. But it was remarkably spacious and flat, spread wide across the East Wing, dropping at the edges into slanted tiles, peaked at the window points over the attics on the rear face of the building. Ahead, the large dome marking the manor entrance caught the sunlight, making it glint in my direction, but even with all its glorious colours, it sat in pale contrast to the wall of glass Arthur and David had commissioned. Clearly, they¡¯d been planning it for much longer than I realized. Its sheer magnitude and ambience was probably visible from the furthest bridge connecting Loslilian Island to the mainland. It stood at least thirty feet above the manor, the ceiling forming a long peak down the length of it, so clear and open it was a glistening shrine to the sun, inviting its golden beams down onto the mess of greenery inside. I wasn¡¯t sure where¡¯d they stuffed the lab, but there was no sign of another room anywhere up here. As I neared the building, I scanned the windows for sight of Arthur. Word had it that he was up here pottering around somewhere, but there were at least four rows of tables and planters inside, and I wasn¡¯t sure I¡¯d spot him once I was in the thick of it all. I pushed the door open and stared down the barrel of the first aisle: greenery, stacked high up to the ceilings, came face to face with what I imagined were special kinds of lights for growing things. There was a warm buzz in the air with the sound of life, and under the heat that saturated the room there was a gentle sound of dripping water and a rich soil flavour settling on the scent of newly budding flowers. It was beautiful and almost tropical. A flicker of movement down the end caught my eye then, steering it to the busy-looking figure trimming leaves off a plant and laying them in a tub at his feet. He looked old from back here¡ªhunched and almost weathered, but as I drew closer, my eyes adjusted to his form, and his youthful appearance altered my first impression. ¡°Arthur?¡± He looked up, laying the scissors down. ¡°Amara? What brings you here?¡± ¡°Came to see the new lab.¡± ¡°Did you now?¡± he asked in a tone that indicated disbelief. ¡°Yeah, um¡ª¡± I stood beside him, wrapping myself up in my own arms. ¡°And to see if you¡¯d heard yet.¡± ¡°About Jason¡¯s lab? Yes.¡± He walked across to the planters opposite us. ¡°And I hear celebrations are in order.¡± ¡°Yup. Lighthouse party.¡± I turned to watch him. ¡°So, you¡¯ll come?¡± ¡°Wouldn¡¯t miss it.¡± ¡°Great. So¡ª¡± I looked around. ¡°Where¡¯s your lab?¡± He tapped his foot on the ground a few times. ¡°You¡¯re standing on it.¡± I stepped back as though I really were actually standing on a lab, and not a dirt floor. ¡°We used some of the attic space,¡± he explained. ¡°Would you like to see it?¡± ¡°Um, not just now.¡± I waved a politely dismissive hand. ¡°I uh. . .¡± He drew a loud breath, but kept working like I wasn¡¯t even there, letting it out with, ¡°You want something.¡± ¡°Um, yeah.¡± I leaned against the table. ¡°I wanted to ask you about why you came here.¡± ¡°Here?¡± ¡°Not to the greenhouse, but I heard that when you signed on to this whole ¡°Project Kill Drake¡±, the reward you were seeking was. . .¡± He stiffened a little, standing straight. ¡°You¡¯ve spoken with Morgaine.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I took a step closer. ¡°Arthur, I¡ª¡± ¡°You¡¯ve nothing to worry about, my dear.¡± He turned and lay a firm hand to my shoulder¡ªthat gentle reassurance only he seemed able to give with just a simple touch. ¡°I¡¯m not going anywhere.¡± ¡°I know. She told me you¡¯d changed your mind, and¡ª¡± ¡°I haven¡¯t changed my mind about anything, Amara.¡± He picked up the scissors and began trimming the plant again. ¡°I still want to die. But I won¡¯t. I promised David I would be your eternal guardian.¡± The regret in his tone sent an arrow into my chest. ¡°Why do you want to die, Arthur?¡± ¡°Vampires love eternally, my dear. And no matter how many remedies I mix¡ª¡± He motioned around the greenhouse. ¡°I can¡¯t mix one for a broken heart.¡± I swallowed hard, nodding to hide the rush of tears in my eyes. ¡°So, you still love her¡ªArietta¡ªso deeply after all this time?¡± ¡°No,¡± he said simply. ¡°Despite the absence of her soul from this world, I am sure I love more each passing day.¡± My hand moved to rest on my heart, barely containing the ache that wanted to consume me. ¡°Then why did you promise David you¡¯d stay alive?¡± ¡°Because I know the pain you will suffer without him.¡± He looked sideways at me for just a second. ¡°And I will be here to make sure you never go to join him.¡± ¡°Why? If I¡¯d be happier dead, why would you stop me?¡± ¡°Same reason you¡¯d stop me, Amara.¡± He laid the scissors down again and walked slowly over, placing one hand then the other on my arms, gripping firmly. ¡°Where there is life, there is hope. And you are the hope of many. I cannot let that die.¡± ¡°But I¡¯m sad for you, Arthur.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t waste your thoughts on me, Amara. I¡¯m an old man, and I can do enough worrying for myself.¡± ¡°I know.¡± I reached out and toyed aimlessly with a leaf. ¡°But, I just want you to be happy.¡± ¡°For what it¡¯s worth¡ª¡± He smiled lovingly down at me. ¡°I am. You make me happy.¡± ¡°Aw, Arthur.¡± I felt my cheeks flush a little. ¡°You¡¯re too nice to have suffered so much.¡± He laughed through his nose, turning away again to go about his business. ¡°Sufferance does not befall the ungracious, princess; it presents itself to he who knows love and happiness, because without those, one cannot suffer.¡± ¡°What if there was a way?¡± I said, running my thumb down the leaf repeatedly. I wasn''t sure how he¡¯d react to this, but I had to at least ask. ¡°A way to what?¡± ¡°What if there was a way to reverse death, her death?¡± He didn¡¯t show it, didn¡¯t make it obvious, but he wasn¡¯t down with it. Not one bit. All he said, in a calm voice, was ¡°Men must not dig where gods lay stones.¡± ¡°But you must have at least thought about it? Even once.¡± ¡°Of course I have. What man wouldn¡¯t? But it¡¯s not right, Amara. Deliberate reincarnation, it . . . it¡¯s against the laws of nature, and God.¡± ¡°Not necessarily.¡± His stern gaze met mine. ¡°What have you found?¡± ¡°It¡¯s not the same spell Drake uses, Arthur¡ª¡± I held back for a second. If I told him what I found in the Book of Shadows, there was a very real chance he might stop me from using it. ¡°It¡¯s something else.¡± His lips folded inward, making a stern line. ¡°It¡¯s a spell written by Lilith, we think. I found it in Morgana¡¯s Book of¡ª¡± ¡°Amara, you must not meddle in the¡ª¡± ¡°But I have magic.¡± I held my hand up. ¡°You said it yourself. You said all immortal beings, all born immortals have magic of a kind.¡± ¡°Yes, of a kind. That does not mean you can perform witchcraft.¡± ¡°Why not? Drake can.¡± ¡°Drake?¡± He laughed and turned away, propping his hands on the counter in front of him. ¡°Drake has no soul, Amara. And it is witchcraft that turned it to ash.¡± ¡°Arthur, what if it didn¡¯t have to be that way? What if I could use white magic to bring things back to life?¡± ¡°There is no magic that can bring things back to life, my girl.¡± He spun around, his voice grumbling with rage in the back of his throat. ¡°It¡¯s the Devil¡¯s work: trickery. You might think you hold the power, but when you cross those boundaries, you open floodways for darker things, and I can¡¯t protect you from those.¡± ¡°This spell I found, Arthur¡ª¡± I took a step closer, looking up into his bright blue eyes. ¡°It¡¯s . . . it originally came from Aide-Memoire de l¡¯Auress,¡± I lied. Arthur went to speak, but his mouth just sat slightly open, caught on his words. ¡°There¡¯s a page missing from the back. I lined them up perfectly, Arthur. I know it¡¯s Lilith¡¯s spell. I can feel it.¡± I touched my heart. He sniffed once. ¡°Do you have it on you?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not that stupid. I know you¡¯ll take it from me.¡± He smiled. ¡°Then you know me well.¡± ¡°I do,¡± I said, taking a very casual stroll around the plant tables. ¡°But you don¡¯t know me, not like you think you do. I¡¯m not as dumb as I pretend to be.¡± ¡°I never said you were, Amara.¡± ¡°No. But you think I¡¯d dabble in the darkness of black magic.¡± ¡°I think you would do anything to get David back after he dies, and I think you came to me today, not to ask if I would want Arietta resurrected, but if I thought you were capable of performing the spell.¡± Page 47 Whoa. Yep. No messing about with guys this old. I let out a long, hard breath.Advertisement ¡°Amara, my dear, sweet girl.¡± He appeared beside me, slowly taking my hand up to his lips. ¡°You know I love you¡ª¡± He kissed it, ¡°¡ªas if you were my own blood. But I will not stand by and see you make the mistakes your ancestors made. You cannot perform that spell, and if you do, your soul will pay the price.¡± ¡°It¡¯s white magic, Arthur. It uses the will of Mother Nature. It can bring things back if She gives them passage.¡± He nodded. ¡°I know. And I happen to know that Drake has searched for this spell for some centuries. But I know God gives no man right to play his game. For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. You know this.¡± ¡°I do. But I¡¯m willing to suffer any consequence to save David¡ªto bring him back. Even if it means the price for balance in the natural order of things is my own life.¡± ¡°What if it wasn¡¯t?¡± he said, and paused. ¡°What if it was the life of someone you love? Your father, perhaps? Could you live with the guilt?¡± My eyes drifted slowly down to my feet. ¡°But, what if the spell can also cure immortality¡ªhelp the Damned?¡± ¡°Immortality is not a disease, my dear.¡± ¡°No. It¡¯s a curse. And it haunts those children, Arthur. I can¡¯t bear the thought of them never growing up,¡± I cried, pointing off to the side as if the Damned House was there. ¡°I don¡¯t want any more pain for them. I don¡¯t want anyone suffering. I just want things to be normal.¡± He swept in and embraced me, pressing his lips to my hair. ¡°I wish I could go back and stop David before he gave you blood that first time, Amara. I want normality for you more than you could possibly know. But we have to accept what we cannot change, and change only what we can.¡± ¡°It is possible to change this, though, Arthur. I can do this spell. You know I can.¡± ¡°I know you are more powerful than you realise. But I have to ask you not to try it. I¡¯ve given my reasons.¡± He stepped back from me. ¡°And you will either listen or you won¡¯t.¡± ¡°The thing is, Arthur, I¡¯ve heard you, but I don¡¯t agree with you.¡± ¡°Well, you always have had a mind of your own, my dear. What am I if not a man who has lived many centuries and experienced all walks of life? Why should you believe anything I have to say?¡± ¡°Because I feel it in my heart that this is the right thing, that this spell can help.¡± ¡°You feel that this spell can bring David back, and that is all you care about: consequences be damned.¡± ¡°Well, you got me then, don¡¯t ya?¡± I said sarcastically, turning my palms up. ¡°Guess you do know everything.¡± ¡°Amara, you know I feel the same¡ªwe all do. We all want him to live as much as you do¡ª¡± ¡°No.¡± I held my index finger up. ¡°Not as much as I do. You cannot comprehend how badly I don¡¯t want him to die, or what I¡¯m willing to do to stop it.¡± He looked deep into my eyes, right past the barrier I forged, and pierced my soul. ¡°I do see what you will sacrifice for this, and I understand it. You know I do, so do not accuse me of ignorance, my dear. I know better than any man what it means to lose those you love.¡± He wiped a hand across his mouth and turned away, the breath he exhaled coming out jagged. ¡°I just don¡¯t want to lose you in the process.¡± ¡°You know you can¡¯t stop me.¡± He nodded but didn¡¯t turn around¡ªdidn¡¯t look at me. ¡°I wouldn¡¯t think to.¡± ¡°Good.¡± I nodded once and, with fists tight, turned away like a solider with marching orders. The forest leaned in as I entered, watching me walk the path toward the Stone. I felt my way along the columns of trees, pulled by the force of Nature surrounding everything in this place, keeping my eyes closed until the radiant warmth emanating off the Stone marked the end of my journey. I sat down against it and pulled the rumpled paper from my pocket, angling it so the sun lit the page. The first item the junction spell called for was something dead. I frowned, chewing my lip. I really hadn¡¯t thought this one through. ¡°Dead things . . . dead things,¡± I said to myself, looking around. The only dead things at the manor were the drained humans in the feeding block. And the idea of digging through a pile of rotting corpses was not really all that appealing. ¡°Any suggestions?¡± I asked the forest. A cool breeze settled around the base of the ancient trees then, flicking crunchy leaves toward my feet in a small pile. I tilted my head back and looked up at the sky, casting my eyes quickly back to the ground after. ¡°I don¡¯t get it.¡± The leaves flickered in the wind again, the corner of one so dry it snapped off under my bare foot, and at the same time, so too snapped a conclusion: dead leaves. Of course. ¡°Thanks.¡± With the spell in one hand, death in the other, I read the words aloud, feeling the pull of nature surge through my feet, up my legs, into my heart and down through my fingertips, charging them, making the energy within burn like fire. And at the point I expected the brown leaf in my palm to ignite, it came to life: green starting up the stem, spreading out like rivers of water along the veins, bringing moisture and elasticity back to its surface until, finally, I felt its spirit again. The blue light in my fingers receded, leaving me open-mouthed and breathless. ¡°You have got to be kidding me.¡± The leaf seemed to revel in the sunshine, the magic of life tingling against my fingertips. I put it down quickly and shuffled back, waiting to see if it shrivelled and folded in on itself, dying without the touch of my curious blue light. But it stayed there, gently blowing in the wind, green and soft and supple. Alive. I gave life. My body, my power, I gave life. But it was just a leaf. It had neither breath nor consciousness. Jason said this spell made a path for a soul to cross over, not that it would regenerate an aged, lifeless body. All living things had souls, even the smallest ant or rose bud, but their souls were different to a human¡¯s¡ªthey went to a different place. How could this spell to create a doorway or a path be used to restore something physical¡ªto reverse ageing? ¡°Easy,¡± said a voice across the clearing. ¡°It wasn¡¯t the spell that did it.¡± ¡°Then what did?¡± Jason went to speak, his mouth sitting open for a second, but he closed it, shaking his head as he came to sit beside me. ¡°You.¡± ¡°Me?¡± I almost laughed. ¡°I can¡¯t restore life.¡± ¡°Not the kind you¡¯re hoping to restore, no. But, you are the Auress of the mortal realm. And with that comes certain abilities.¡± ¡°Abilities?¡± ¡°They¡¯re different for each of your kind. In my research, when I studied Lilithians back at college, I found that Lilith had the power to restore life to animals. She tried to extend that power to humans and even Lilithians, but it was very limited.¡± ¡°So. . .she could bring a dog back to life?¡± ¡°Yep.¡± ¡°And, what? I get plant life?¡± Jase laughed. ¡°I guess so.¡± ¡°Great.¡± I looked down at my fingertips. ¡°That¡¯s gonna come in handy one day, I¡¯m sure of it.¡± He laughed again. ¡°Don¡¯t think of it as something useful to you, but more of something that can benefit everything around you.¡± He motioned to the forest. I smiled up at the trees. ¡°Yeah, you¡¯re right. And I did see a sad-looking rose bush on my way in. Maybe I can at least help it?¡± ¡°I bet you can. Now¡ª¡± He plucked the page from my fingertips. ¡°What were you hoping to achieve here?¡± I eyed the spell. ¡°I . . . I thought maybe, since David¡¯s soul will be ¡®disconnected¡¯ from this realm when he uses the dagger, I might be able to bring him back.¡± He slowly reached out for me. ¡°Sweet girl, you don¡¯t have this kind of magic.¡± ¡°How do you know?¡± I jerked away. ¡°This is witchcraft, Ara. You¡¯re not a witch.¡± ¡°But I have magic.¡± ¡°You have Nature¡¯s magic. It won¡¯t support this kind of spell.¡± ¡°Then . . . maybe I can heal his body after he dies. Maybe I can start his heart, and the soul will slip back into the human form¡ªlike resuscitation?¡± I suggested. ¡°I doubt it, Ara. That¡¯s not what¡ª¡± ¡°Why are you so quick to shoot me down, Jase?¡± ¡°Because I don¡¯t want you to be disappointed when it fails,¡± he said in a slightly louder voice. ¡°When it fails, huh?¡± ¡°Yes. When,¡± he repeated, lifting my chin so our eyes met. ¡°Ara, I support everything you do, one-hundred per cent. But this won¡¯t save David. I know this, to my core. If you keep hoping, all you¡¯ll do is make it hurt more at the end.¡± ¡°You don¡¯t know that it¡¯ll fail. How can you possibly know that?¡± ¡°You¡¯re right.¡± Jase opened his arms. ¡°You¡¯re absolutely right. So, try it on me: start my heart. If I¡¯m wrong, I will apologise and we¡¯ll go from there.¡± I sat up on my knees. ¡°Seriously?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± He unbuttoned his shirt a little and grabbed my hand, placed it against his heart. ¡°Go on. But if I¡¯m right, you need to drop this and realise that you can¡¯t resuscitate David. And also that if the junction spell were to actually work, it would require a witch, Ara. Not an Auress.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I nodded, repositioning my hand on his chest. His body felt cool and soft under my touch, the gentle rhythm of his needless breath moving his chest up and down a little faster now than before. He waited expectantly while I focused, feeling all life move from within the forest, through me. But nothing happened. It was as if I¡¯d poured water onto a lidded container: the power just didn¡¯t go through¡ªwasn¡¯t . . . absorbed. ¡°I . . . oh, Jase.¡± I looked up into his eyes, half blinded by tears. ¡°I can¡¯t save him, can I?¡± ¡°Not with Nature¡¯s magic.¡± He scrunched up the spell and tossed it over his shoulder. ¡°But it never hurt to try.¡± I took a jagged breath, the air cooling the tears on my lips. ¡°Arthur was right.¡± ¡°I know.¡± ¡°I just. . .¡± ¡°I know.¡± He cupped my cheek and rolled my face against his chest. And it hurt. It hurt to smell him, be this close to him. It reminded me too much of what would be gone soon, but also, deeper than any other feeling, made me miss him so terribly bad I just wanted to stay in his arms. ¡°I know,¡± he said one more time, and I laughed into his shirt, half crying, and completely wetting it with tears. He leaned out a little and the smile he offered made the trees and grass seem yellow with warmth. ¡°Hey, cheer up, m¡¯kay. We got a party to plan.¡± Page 48 ¡°You¡¯re right. This is a day for celebration. Not tears.¡± I wiped my face. ¡°I¡¯m okay now.¡±Advertisement ¡°You sure?¡± ¡°I¡¯m just. . .¡± I nodded, sniffling. ¡°I¡¯m okay.¡± ¡°Come on then.¡± He stood and offered his hand. ¡°You can come with me to the cellar to get the wine.¡± I placed my hand in his and pulled myself to stand. ¡°No, you go get the wine. I need to get changed.¡± ¡°Changed?¡± He appraised my outfit sceptically. ¡°You look fine.¡± ¡°Ugh.¡± I rolled my eyes. ¡°You are so not a girl, are you?¡± ¡°Um?¡± He looked down at his jeans. ¡°Not last time I checked.¡± Vampire celebrations had a lot more class than human ones. As I trudged through the open field toward the lighthouse, I half expected to see a strobe light flashing¡ªthe only thing more noticeable than the bass-thumping tunes¡ªand a bunch of drunk fools hanging off the railing on the top floor. So the gentle glow of candlelight emanating from small tea-lights in each of the six windows wrapping the giant tube, and the soft hum of Mozart, was quite a pleasant surprise. I wiped my feet with a light scuff on the doormat and popped my head in, calling out to see if anyone was here yet. ¡°Just us, so far.¡± Jason trotted down the stairs with two wineglasses in hand, his light blue shirt open a little at the neck, sitting snuggly over his denim jeans. I could just make out the dark lines of the tattooed band wrapping his arm through the fabric. He looked as sweetly sexy as Jase always did, but instead of letting myself smile and tell him that, I appraised him critically. ¡°So even you got changed before the party.¡± He looked down at his outfit and handed me a wineglass. ¡°Couldn¡¯t let you be the only pretty one.¡± ¡°Well, I can do pretty without all the cologne and hair product.¡± ¡°Hey, don¡¯t knock the hair.¡± He ran a hand through it. ¡°Took me hours to get it this perfect.¡± ¡°Liar.¡± I laughed. ¡°Yeah, you got me. Actually, it¡¯s not hair product. It¡¯s just wet.¡± His open palm showed the moisture. ¡°I knew that, Jase. I was teasing.¡± I saluted with the glass, then peered in at the contents. ¡°It¡¯s lemonade.¡± He sipped through a smile. ¡°You know me well.¡± ¡°I do.¡± He nodded. ¡°Besides, you¡¯re not twenty-one yet. Can¡¯t have you breaking the law.¡± ¡°No. I mean, what would the king say?¡± ¡°Say? Nothing.¡± He tapped his glass on mine. ¡°It¡¯s what he¡¯d do that I worry about.¡± ¡°He wouldn¡¯t care, you know.¡± ¡°Then you don¡¯t know him very well.¡± He laughed, prompting me to follow him up the stairs. The racket of footfalls on steel sounded odd because, while I could see my own feet and Jason¡¯s ahead of mine, there was only one set of echoes. He was so ridiculously light-footed he made me feel like an elephant. ¡°Did Emily say if she was coming?¡± I asked, hoping to drown out the evidence of my lead-foot. ¡°Yes, and Nate, and a few others, too. But it¡¯ll be a pretty small gathering tonight,¡± he said. ¡°I¡¯ve set out a picnic on the balcony. Now we¡¯ve got that railing fixed right ¡®round the ledge, it¡¯s a bit safer up there.¡± ¡°Sounds great. I hope you have cake.¡± ¡°Sweet tooth, huh?¡± He looked down at me from the step above. I bit my lip. ¡°Yeah. Kinda.¡± ¡°Thought you might say that, so¡ª¡± He stopped and I nearly bumped into him. ¡°I took the liberty of venturing into town today¡ªbought you some chocolate.¡± My tongue moved out of my mouth and across my lips involuntarily. ¡°I haven¡¯t had chocolate since I first moved here!¡± ¡°I know. I¡ª¡± ¡°Hey guys,¡± Emily called, stuffing her phone in her back pocket as she came through the door. ¡°Am I late?¡± ¡°Just in time,¡± Jason said. ¡°Come on up.¡± ¡°Hey,¡± Blade said casually, coming in behind Em. ¡°Did I miss any fun?¡± ¡°Nah, Emily only just got here.¡± I winked at Blade. ¡°What¡¯s that supposed to mean?¡± Em asked, her nose crinkling. ¡°You¡¯re the fun one¡ªof course,¡± I said. ¡°Yeah, right.¡± She started up the stairs. ¡°I¡¯m sure that¡¯s what you meant.¡± I huffed as she shoved past me, Blade hot on her trail, then turned to Jason. ¡°She thought I was being mean, didn¡¯t she?¡± ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± He squeezed my shoulder reassuringly. ¡°She just doesn¡¯t know Blade likes her yet.¡± I looked up the stairs to the top. ¡°No kidding.¡± Conversations died down and the food dwindled to scraps, and by the time Nate left, the only other people still hanging around were Blade and Em, Arthur, Jason, and I. And I liked it this way. It was peaceful and intimate¡ªeven if Em was still holding a grudge for the nastiness she assumed I¡¯d expressed earlier. I was beginning to see what Mike meant about her being so moody lately. ¡°How¡¯s that sleeping potion coming along?¡± I asked Arthur. He stood beside me, both of us leaning on the railing, our drinks in hand above the nothingness. ¡°Why do you ask, my dear?¡± ¡°Mike needs to extract more venom this week for the sword-tipping, and I don¡¯t want him to do it awake.¡± ¡°I¡¯ll have it ready tomorrow,¡± he said with a nod. ¡°I¡¯ve made it a little stronger than last time. It seems Mike has developed an immunity to it.¡± ¡°Really?¡± ¡°It¡¯s an acclimation thing,¡± Jase said, appearing on my left. ¡°Medicines and certain treatments very rarely work more than thrice on a vampire¡ªof any kind.¡± ¡°Wow. I didn¡¯t know that.¡± ¡°There is much to learn,¡± Arthur said. ¡°But you have centuries to do so.¡± I nodded and leaned a little more on my arm, blowing the warm air from my mouth over my cold hands. ¡°It¡¯s breezy up here, isn¡¯t it?¡± ¡°Are you ready to go back?¡± Jason asked. ¡°I could walk you.¡± ¡°That¡¯s okay. I¡¯ll wait for Blade.¡± I jerked my head in his direction. ¡°Falcon¡¯s orders.¡± Jason nodded, leaning down on the railing, too, and angled his shoulders in so his head came closer to mine. ¡°Did you see that?¡± All three of us turned our heads to the pair sitting with their legs dangling over the balcony ledge, shoulder-to-shoulder, whispering and giggling with each other. ¡°He just put his jacket on Em,¡± Jason finished. ¡°Does he know she doesn¡¯t get cold?¡± I asked. ¡°Yes, I do,¡± Blade said, turning around. ¡°But it¡¯s how I was raised.¡± We all laughed, and Emily just shrunk into herself a little more. ¡°You warm enough?¡± Jason asked, reaching across to tighten the leather jacket around my chest again. I angled my chin so my nose went into the collar a bit. It smelled like him, and from the moment he put it around me earlier, I¡¯d felt like I wanted to cry. Somehow, his scent conjured up some feeling¡ªsome emotion that should¡¯ve had an identifying thought to accompany it. But as my brain searched for that spark, that instant of recall, I was left blank; carrying only the feeling that my heart was incredibly broken and that Jase¡¯s was too. But it was silly. So I brushed it off and nodded. ¡°Yeah, I¡¯m lovely and warm, thanks.¡± ¡°You¡¯re welcome,¡± he said, but his brows moved together in the middle, forming that line. I wanted to ask him to just spit it out¡ªsay what he was thinking. I knew he¡¯d read my mind just now. I knew he knew I knew something was amiss between us, and if Arthur wasn¡¯t here, I was sure Jase would tell me. ¡°You¡¯re very quiet tonight, Amara,¡± Arthur noted, pinching my sleeve affectionately. ¡°Is everything okay?¡± I nodded, brushing my head against his shoulder for a second. ¡°It¡¯s okay. I just found out about my real mom today, is all.¡± Jason stood from his lean, and Arthur hung his head a little lower. ¡°Why didn¡¯t you tell me, Ara?¡± Jason asked. ¡°I didn¡¯t even see that in your thoughts.¡± I shrugged. ¡°Guess I¡¯ve had other things on my mind.¡± ¡°I¡¯m so sorry.¡± He swept me into his arms and held me against his chest for a second, cupping the back of my head with his ultra cold hand. ¡°I¡¯m a terrible friend. I should have¡ª¡± ¡°It¡¯s not your fault, Jase.¡± I patted his chest and stood back. ¡°There was nothing really to tell. My mom died in childbirth, and my dad was killed in Iraq.¡± ¡°Amara.¡± Arthur¡¯s hand came down on my shoulder; I turned around to face him. ¡°I am truly sorry. David and I had agreed to tell you in time, but¡ª¡± ¡°David didn¡¯t tell me, Arthur. I called my dad.¡± ¡°Why didn¡¯t you tell me you knew?¡± Jase asked. I looked back at him. ¡°Because, in the same conversation where I told David I knew about my mom, I also told him about the headaches, and then he approved the lab.¡± Jason smiled, leaning on the railing again, and Arthur and I followed suit. ¡°How¡¯s things going at Elysium?¡± Arthur asked. ¡°Have they worked their way through most of the prisoners now?¡± ¡°Mm-hm.¡± I sipped my drink as I nodded. ¡°But a few of them have to go to the mental asylum.¡± Arthur and Jason exchanged glances. ¡°Pepper inclusive,¡± I probed, keeping my gaze on the horizon. ¡°I¡¯m not surprised,¡± Arthur said, turning to lean his back on the rail. ¡°I saw her a year or so ago, and requested they move her then.¡± ¡°Why didn¡¯t they?¡± ¡°Drake denied the motion.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°David was gone at the time. And . . . I guess Drake saw it as a method of revenge for his defection, perhaps,¡± Arthur mused. My lip curled. ¡°That¡¯s so cruel.¡± ¡°He can be a cruel man.¡± I looked up at Arthur for a second and watched his blue eyes wander in thought. He looked younger when he was absent from his mind, his features so much softer and almost kind of sad looking. ¡°Don¡¯t you both think that, maybe it¡¯s time for me to know what happened to her¡ªto Pepper?¡± I waited then, letting the idea sink in for them. ¡°Clearly, I¡¯m not going to dump David if I find out he¡¯s a masochistic torturer.¡± I held up my ring hand. ¡°If I haven¡¯t left him yet, chances are, I¡¯m not going to.¡± Arthur smiled down at me, but when he looked at Jase, he frowned. ¡°Jase?¡± I caught the same vibe Arthur had. Page 49 Jason bent down with a huge sigh and left his wineglass by his feet, standing back up again slowly. ¡°You¡¯re right, Ara. You should know.¡±Advertisement ¡°Yes,¡± Arthur said suggestively, his wide eyes arresting Jason¡¯s boyish confidence. ¡°She should really know everything, shouldn¡¯t she?¡± ¡°In good time,¡± Jase said. ¡°We¡¯ll start with Pepper, and see how we go from there.¡± Arthur seemed to agree, stepping back and offering the floor to Jase while he went to grab another glass. ¡°They were in love,¡± Jase began. ¡°As much any two vampire souls had ever been, but David''s desperation to be a council member started to waver from the day he met Pepper. He was missing meetings, failing to complete tasks, and staring in dreamy-eyed gazes when he should have been carrying out punishments. The last straw was when he set a prisoner free without torture.¡± ¡°He set someone free?¡± I asked, nearly leaping over the balcony in disbelief. ¡°He wasn¡¯t always as a harsh a man as he is now,¡± Arthur added, standing beside me again. ¡°So, what did the prisoner do, the one he set free? Was it a horrid crime?¡± ¡°He¡¯d unlawfully turned a human,¡± Arthur said. ¡°And David quite simply said that he understood how love could madden a man and force him to do things he wouldn¡¯t normally do.¡± I stared out to sea. ¡°That doesn¡¯t sound like my David.¡± ¡°It wasn¡¯t the David any of us knew,¡± Jason said. ¡°He was even getting along¡ªor trying to¡ªget along with me.¡± I smiled, rubbing Jase¡¯s arm, then turned my head to look at Arthur. ¡°So Pepper was a good influence on him?¡± ¡°In ways.¡± Arthur nodded. ¡°Well, enough that David had planned to ask her to marry him¡ª¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°He had the ring his grandmother passed down,¡± Arthur continued. ¡°And he¡¯d set the date and the time he would do it.¡± ¡°But. . .¡± I thought back to the day he told me about the one and only vampire he¡¯d ever wanted to marry. ¡°Who was it?¡± Jason asked, coming up off the railing just a little. ¡°Who was what?¡± Arthur asked, confused. ¡°Ara was just thinking that David told her he¡¯d only ever wanted to be with one vampire, and it wasn¡¯t Pepper.¡± ¡°Who then?¡± ¡°Morg,¡± I said, my tone rising in question on the end. Arthur and Jason broke into a gusty fit of laughter. ¡°That is a big, fat lie, right there,¡± Jason said, failing to compose himself. ¡°They hated each other.¡± ¡°Really?¡± ¡°Yes,¡± Arthur said, sobering a little. ¡°I suspect David told you it was Morgaine so you wouldn¡¯t keep asking.¡± I nodded. ¡°Well, it worked.¡± ¡°I¡¯m surprised you didn¡¯t keep asking after that, anyway,¡± Jason said, leaning down again. ¡°He and Morg are incredibly mismatched.¡± ¡°I just figured it was in another time, you know, and that people change.¡± Jase wiped his mouth. ¡°Not that much.¡± ¡°Right. So, what was Pepper like then?¡± ¡°She was a sweet thing, very much like you in a lot of ways. Her hair was golden, her features petite, and she always seemed to be smiling, like nothing ever bothered her,¡± Arthur said fondly. ¡°I know she reminded David a lot of his aunt.¡± ¡°And he was gonna ask her to marry him, right? So, why didn¡¯t he?¡± ¡°The night before he set off for his biannual leave, Drake called him to preside over one last case.¡± Arthur¡¯s lips rolled inward, the memory travelling across his face, painting it with emotion. ¡°I saw the look in David¡¯s eye, saw his heart break right there in a room full of people when Pepper was bound and thrown to her knees before him like some petty thief.¡± ¡°He didn¡¯t know she¡¯d been arrested?¡± ¡°No.¡± The way Jason said that made me look at him. ¡°I was the one who arrested her.¡± ¡°You?¡± ¡°I was a Warrior, Ara. It was my job.¡± ¡°Who gave the order?¡± ¡°The king.¡± ¡°I just. . .¡± I rubbed my head. ¡°I can¡¯t picture David sitting there and sentencing her to torture. I just can¡¯t.¡± ¡°It was a grim scene and it was, in many ways, a test,¡± Arthur said. ¡°He knew that. From the moment he looked into her eyes and then over at Drake, David knew his next move would determine the fate of his career.¡± ¡°He had to leave emotion out of it from there,¡± Jase said. ¡°He heard her pleas, heard her reasons for turning the child, and he suddenly went stone-faced, as if he cared nothing for her.¡± ¡°Because she broke the law, or because it affected a child?¡± ¡°No one really knows.¡± ¡°Wow.¡± I toyed with the stem of my glass, then popped it on the floor by my feet. ¡°So, why does she haunt him so much? I mean, I knew he sentenced her and that he¡¯d loved her, but what¡¯s the big deal, really?¡± ¡°The standard punishment for a vampire that turns a child is The Hot Tar,¡± Arthur said. ¡°Whereby the vampire is stripped naked and lowered into a vat of boiling tar, burned until their flesh peels from their body, then taken away to heal again, slowly, and without blood.¡± ¡°Once their skin is just pink again,¡± Jason said, ¡°they repeat the process. And this is done for the full term of the sentence. Often three years.¡± Arthur nodded to confirm. ¡°However, Drake was so disturbed by the fact that a council member¡¯s own girl had broken such a law that he stepped in after the sentencing and added two months torture¡ªto be carried out by soldiers during the day, and by David at night.¡± ¡°But . . . what about his leave? I thought he was¡ª¡± ¡°He was delayed by two months as punishment for not controlling his girl,¡± Arthur said. ¡°Wow. So. . .¡± I pictured it all in my head, seeing the room I was taken to the day Jason tortured me. ¡°He just did it: tortured her, like, happily?¡± ¡°Certainly not, my dear.¡± Arthur exhaled, looking off at nothing for a few seconds, his face scrunched up tightly. ¡°Every day, when he would return to his chamber after her torture, he would fall to his knees and pray for forgiveness.¡± ¡°I found him once,¡± Jason said, his own gaze drifting off to thought. ¡°He was on his knees, his body rigid, eyes on the brink of tears. He said he couldn¡¯t take any more. He said she cried his name out, begging him for mercy. I offered to trade places with him¡ªbe the one to do it so that he didn¡¯t have to suffer. No one would¡¯ve known it was me. But¡ª¡± ¡°But he refused?¡± I said, knowing why. He would never have let anyone else hurt someone he loved. Which, I understood then, is why he was so quick to forgive Jason for the same. ¡°I remember, one night,¡± Arthur added, ¡°I embraced him, tried to comfort him, and for the first time since he was a boy, he wrapped his arms around me and I heard him cry. Nothing haunted me more than seeing tears from this boy who refused to cry for even the most heinous things. Even the day his aunt died, he shed not one tear¡ªthat any of us saw, anyway.¡± ¡°But despite that,¡± Jase said. ¡°He¡¯d dust himself off and go back down to that cell, because if he didn¡¯t do what the king asked, much worse would be ordered for the poor girl.¡± ¡°What kind of torture did he . . . I mean . . . it must have been bad to haunt David?¡± ¡°It was.¡± Arthur nodded. ¡°The final straw came one night when I found him in a corridor, his hands and face covered in blood¡ªher blood¡ªher golden hair tangled in long, broken threads around his fingers. I asked him what had happened, and he said she went mad. Told me she just couldn¡¯t take it anymore.¡± ¡°Then . . . what was the hair and the blood from?¡± ¡°I asked the same thing. But he couldn¡¯t speak. So, I went down to see the girl, attend to her medically, if needed¡ªand found her huddled in the darkest corner, her eyes black, her body unclothed and bleeding. When I squatted down and inspected her closer, found her hair was torn in patches from her scalp¡ªmost of the skin missing from her upper thighs and wrists, peeled away, you might say, as if she¡¯d scratched it off with her own nails.¡± ¡°What happened to her?¡± I asked, horrified. Arthur looked away. ¡°David had found her in a similar state. He asked what had become of her, and a prisoner told how she¡¯d been quite brutally raped¡ªhad things done to her that no young girl could imagine possible. She¡¯d tried to tear the skin from her own body to wash off the horrors of what those men did to her, and when David came to comfort her, she attacked him, thinking he was one of them.¡± ¡°The guards stepped in, Ara,¡± Jason said. ¡°Every prisoner knows that the punishment for attacking a council leader is a grave one, no matter what state of mind they¡¯re in at the time.¡± ¡°She was bound,¡± Arthur continued. ¡°Thrashed with the guard¡¯s belt while David watched on¡ªbound himself by the laws he protected. When the lashings stopped, she laid there in a pool of her own blood, and before David could react, the guards grabbed her by the hair and. . .¡± ¡°And?¡± ¡°Sodomized her,¡± Jase said. I covered my mouth, knowing how David would react if that were me. ¡°David tried to fight them off,¡± Jason added. ¡°But it only made matters worse, and he was tangled up in the process, tearing half her hair away himself.¡± ¡°The guards restrained him,¡± Arthur said, ¡°made him watch until the girl gave up screaming and just laid there sobbing his name.¡± ¡°When they released David,¡± Jason said. ¡°He just turned away and walked from the cells like a ghost¡ªwent on leave the next day, and never spoke of her again.¡± ¡°Drake recommended a two-year stint in a high school¡ªto live among those who have so few cares and worries,¡± Arthur said. ¡°He figured a lighter occupation would do David good after such a harrowing ordeal.¡± ¡°School? He sent David to school after all that?¡± Arthur nodded. ¡°And it did do him good. Drake was right. We saw changes in David after just a few weeks. But, even then, everything that made that boy alive was dead. He was colder and harsher, and I worried for the young humans in his community.¡± ¡°Then he met you,¡± Jason said, smiling at something far away. ¡°Yes,¡± Arthur added, and the energy in the space changed, the daunting, horrible reality lifting away a little. ¡°After that, he returned to council meetings¡ªsmiled again. He was, you could say, more human than he¡¯d been since he was a boy.¡± ¡°So, you can imagine what you must mean to him, Ara,¡± Jason said. ¡°That you were the very thing that gave him a reason to live again¡ªto believe that life wasn¡¯t a nightmare he couldn¡¯t wake from.¡± Page 50 I thought back to everything we¡¯d been through, feeling a sense of dread for the time he walked away from us just to protect me from his world. And I was grateful to him for that now more than ever after everything Pepper went through. He always said he couldn¡¯t protect me from the horrors of his world, and this story explained so much more why the very mention of turning a child had sent him storming off to his room, slamming the door. I felt bad for even bringing it up now.Advertisement ¡°God, I just wanna call him and tell him I¡¯m sorry for everything bad I ever said or did.¡± I laughed. ¡°Poor guy.¡± ¡°Yes. And you can see now why, in my pursuit for revenge, I thought it so marvellous to steal you from him¡ªby pain of heart or even death,¡± Jason said. ¡°Wow, that was incredibly malicious, Jase.¡± I backhanded his arm. He rubbed it as if it hurt. ¡°I know. But, he knows I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°We all do.¡± I nodded, looking out to sea, then just let it all out with a really long breath. ¡°Wow.¡± ¡°Yep.¡± Jason leaned beside me again. ¡°Wow.¡± ¡°I¡¯ll say,¡± Blade came to stand beside Jason. ¡°That¡¯s quite a story.¡± ¡°He never told me that,¡± Emily said. ¡°I asked him once, but he wouldn¡¯t tell me.¡± ¡°I can see why,¡± I said. ¡°I wouldn¡¯t either.¡± ¡°Well, now you know.¡± Arthur stood tall again. ¡°And I must warn you, Amara, do not ever bring it up in front of him. Do not ever seek to use it against him or to¡ª¡± ¡°I wouldn¡¯t do that, Arthur.¡± I crossed my heart. ¡°Not even if I was mad with him.¡± ¡°Well, I hope not.¡± He bowed his head. ¡°Because I could not vouch for the man you may see beneath this new David.¡± I nodded. ¡°Okay. I¡¯ll never speak of it. I swear.¡± ¡°See that you don¡¯t,¡± Arthur said, and walked away. ¡°Well, story time¡¯s been fun, Ara,¡± Blade said. ¡°But it¡¯s time for bed.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I looked back at Jase. He offered a sweet smile. ¡°Night, Ara.¡± ¡°Night, Jase.¡± I went to take the jacket off and hand it to him, but he stopped me. ¡°Keep it tonight. Give it back tomorrow when you come see me for our first training session.¡± I snuggled into the leather again. ¡°Okay, what time?¡± ¡°Sunrise.¡± He flashed a mischievous. ¡°Nah, just kidding. Any time you like, sweet girl. I have aaaalll day.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I nodded and walked past him with a big smile on my face. ¡°Sunrise it is.¡± ¡°See you then,¡± he called. I started down the stairs, stopping for a sec to let Emily catch up. ¡°Cute, I¡¯m sure,¡± she muttered coldly. ¡°What?¡± ¡°You and Jase.¡± She grabbed my arm. ¡°He likes you, you know¡ªmore than he should considering he¡¯s your brother-in-law.¡± Blade came up between us. ¡°She knows, Em.¡± ¡°Then why is she even hanging out with him?¡± Blade and I made faces at each other¡ªclear astonishment at Em¡¯s bitchiness. ¡°So, is that how it goes, Em?¡± Blade said. ¡°If you know someone likes you, you keep away from them?¡± ¡°Wouldn¡¯t know.¡± She stormed off ahead of us. ¡°No one¡¯s ever liked me.¡± Blade stopped walking and looked at me, pouting for Em. ¡°All that effort.¡± I patted his shoulder. ¡°And she still doesn¡¯t have a clue, does she?¡± He started walking again with a bit of a lag to his step. ¡°Guess not.¡± ¡°You might just have to be upfront about your feelings, Blade.¡± ¡°To be honest,¡± he said, the little laugh accentuating his Englishness. ¡°I¡¯m afraid she might slap me if I tell her.¡± I chuckled. ¡°Never know, you might enjoy a little slap.¡± ¡°I¡¯ll give you a little slap,¡± he said, threatening my bottom. I elbowed him in the ribs softly and we left the lighthouse behind, but I turned back and caught a wave from the blue-shirt-wearing vampire standing on the balcony before we blended with the darkness. Chapter Ten She opened her eyes, the blue appearing before her lashes even parted, but as an instant smile swept her lips when she saw me, so too did the memory of what just happened. She turned away. ¡°Don''t look at me like that,¡± she said. ¡°Like what?¡± I jumped up sat beside her. ¡°Like you''re really concerned.¡± I was really concerned, I thought, but it wasn¡¯t my thought. I reached across and gently smoothed my thumb down her soft skin, seeing the moment in her mind when that barbarian struck her. It wasn¡¯t a hard hit, it wasn¡¯t even hard enough to change the colour of her skin, but it scared her, shocked her, and in that instant, a part of their friendship died. I could feel that pain. I had good reason to be concerned. She knew that. ¡°He hit you,¡± I said, but the words, the feelings that came with them weren¡¯t mine, either. They were Jason¡¯s. ¡°It was a tiny slap,¡± she said, pulling my hand away. ¡°And I kinda had it coming.¡± ¡°No.¡± I almost regurgitated the words, gasping them out instead. ¡°You¡¯ve been through enough. He had no right to touch you that way. I will skin him alive.¡± The anger I felt in Jason then moved me outside his body, but I heard everything, saw everything the way he saw it in what was obviously a dream he was having¡ªall the way down on the second floor, tucked up tightly in his bed. So I watched, because something in this dream felt familiar somehow, like I¡¯d lived it before. ¡°I''m okay,¡± Ara said softly, cocking her head as though she felt sorry for me. It felt strange to have Jason¡¯s voice in my head as if it were mine. It felt kind of disorienting. I sat back a little and just pretended he was telling the story, almost as if I were reading a book that suddenly switched perspective mid-chapter. ¡°But you shouldn¡¯t be. You shouldn¡¯t brush this off like it doesn''t matter, Ara. He is ten times bigger than you, and he¡ª¡± ¡°I''ve got bigger things to worry about right now, Jase.¡± She rolled away, pulling the blanket up over her shoulder. ¡°Just let it go.¡± My hands hovered over her body for a second, tight, almost grabbing. I wanted to shake her¡ªjust dive into her head and insert all my own experiences and lessons so she¡¯d wake up and smell the damn roses. But I pressed my fingers firmly to the side of her head, sweeping her hair back instead. ¡°I love you, Ara. I won''t let this go.¡± I kissed her face, backing off. ¡°But we¡¯ll talk about it in the morning.¡± There was no point trying to make her see reason tonight. She was as stubborn as an ox when she thought she was right, and while this was an endearing trait most of the time, it was also downright dangerous. It would take time to make her see that her so-called best friend was in the wrong. ¡°Jase?¡± ¡°Shh.¡± I tucked the blanket around her firmly, hoping it¡¯d keep her there, wrapped up safe so I wouldn¡¯t be tempted to lecture her. ¡°Just sleep.¡± But she rolled over and shoved the blanket back. ¡°Let it go. Mike didn''t mean to do that. He¡¯s¡­I mean, look what I put him through. This was just the final straw, okay. He clearly can''t take any more of, well, me.¡± Dear God. Her ability to see the good in everything had finally become a hazard. I lowered my head into my hands. ¡°I understand that, Ara, probably better than you might think, but he¡¯s not just your friend anymore. He''s the head of security. No matter what you do or have done, he should have more self-control than to have slapped you.¡± Surely she could at least see that much reason. ¡°It was a little tap.¡± I looked up from behind my hands. ¡°You¡¯re kidding me, right?¡± ¡°Jase. Go to bed. You look tired.¡± A pattern of thought started in her head then. I couldn¡¯t grasp it enough to see what she was thinking, but I knew she was right about my appearance. I hadn¡¯t slept well since the Masquerade. I¡¯d slept even less since I tortured her, and while I was fine with that, since it felt like some kind of penance, the tiredness was affecting my self-control, decision making, even self-respect, making it hard to maintain grasp on this ever-weaving web of lies and corruption going on around us while simultaneously practicing honourable intentions toward Ara. ¡°I am tired,¡± I said simply. ¡°Did you sleep at all last night?¡± And there it was: the thought she¡¯d started but hadn¡¯t finished. It came to life in her mind like a memory; me, the screaming, the night she came down the corridor to see Arthur leaving my room after administering some hefty drug to stop the night terrors. She¡¯d imagined me in there¡ªimagined herself beside me, holding me. She wanted to be there. But if I let her in, if I let her know I was suffering for what I did to her, she wouldn¡¯t let this go. She wouldn¡¯t let me suffer for that. ¡°What would make you think I hadn''t slept?¡± I asked, planting the idea in her mind to just drop this. ¡°You know already, Jase, you can read my mind.¡± She touched my arm, yanking me back from the invasion on her brain. ¡°How long have you been having those night terrors?¡± I studied her carefully, wanting to let her in, knowing she could help, but at the same time knowing I didn¡¯t deserve it. Then again, she wouldn¡¯t drop this. She¡¯d lay awake all night, worrying, and probably end up coming to my room in the small hours, getting caught by Falcon then having David breathe down her neck because he doesn¡¯t trust her. She wouldn¡¯t let this go unless I either talked to her about it or did something to her brain, which I didn¡¯t want to do. ¡°You¡­so you did see that dream?¡± She nodded. I sunk back, exhaling, as if I didn¡¯t know. ¡°Are they always that bad, the dreams?¡± she asked. ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°I''m sorry.¡± I sat up, feeling my heart come away from my chest in a hot spill of blood. ¡°Ara, please don''t¡ªjust¡­don''t say you¡¯re sorry. I''m sorry. I''m the one who¡ª¡± ¡°No.¡± She grabbed my hand and pressed it to her chest, right over the silver locket my brother gave her as a representation of his love. I wanted to pull away, but she¡¯d never held me like that before. ¡°All of that¡¯s in the past,¡± she said. ¡°I know what you did for me. I know it was to protect me, Jase, I forgave you a very, very long time ago.¡± And she had. I¡¯d seen that in her eyes, her thoughts. It was one of the first things I noticed when we met in the field the day I returned from the dead. ¡°I know.¡± ¡°No, you don''t. It hurts me for you to feel such deep regret. You¡¯re punishing yourself for something you had no control over.¡± Page 51 She was right. But it wasn¡¯t just the torture at Elysium that bothered me¡ªit was the pain I¡¯d caused when I did have control. I drew my hand away. ¡°I just¡­¡±Advertisement ¡°Jase. It¡¯s. In. The. Past,¡± she said, slowly and deliberately. ¡°Stop dreaming about it.¡± ¡°To do that, I¡¯d have to stop sleeping.¡± She rolled her eyes. ¡°How ¡®bout you come visit me in our sleep again instead. We¡¯ll make some nice dreams for you.¡± Instant reaction? Lay her down and enter her head right now. Common sense reaction? ¡°I''m not sure it¡¯s really appropriate for us to be alone like that, Ara.¡± ¡°I know. But I can''t have you reliving that torture every night. I won''t.¡± All very well, but what was she going to do about it? ¡°Not to mention,¡± she continued. ¡°If I''m slipping into your dreams somehow, I don''t really want to be seeing that every time I close my eyes, either.¡± I laughed. It wasn¡¯t really funny, but she was right. She and I, we had a connection like no others in this manor. What I suffered, so too did she. I guess, in that sense alone, I owed it to her to be all right again. ¡°Okay. No more nightmares then.¡± ¡°Good,¡± she said in a businesslike tone, and I just wanted to kiss her. She always had a way of making me feel better. ¡°Now,¡± she added. ¡°I have question for you.¡± Oh no. ¡°Shoot.¡± ¡°The mind-links?¡± ¡°Mm?¡± ¡°Did¡­¡± She tried not to smile. ¡°Did you visit me in our dreams while you were supposedly dead?¡± The smile I started by seeing hers grew. I knew what she was about to ask. ¡°Maybe. Once or twice.¡± ¡°I knew it.¡± She slapped the covers, and her mind went from our adventures in the field to the night I came to her room and danced with her. ¡°So¡­the yellow dress?¡± I wasn¡¯t sure if I should admit this. ¡°Yes, I¡­¡± I shrugged dismissively. ¡°I figured I owed you a new dress¡ªsince I ruined the blue one.¡± ¡°Ha! I can''t believe you just said that.¡± Neither could I. ¡°And, what about the memories?¡± she said. ¡°Did you leave mind-blocks in place, or were you actually in those dreams with me, showing me all those things yourself?¡± ¡°Many of those were memories of things we did before¡­¡± The pictures of my childhood¡ªthe things she¡¯d asked me about, things I¡¯d shown her in our life together before I let her fall into Drake¡¯s hands came to mind, so clear, so intense with the love we have for each other that I almost forgot I was talking. ¡°I never placed mind-blocks. I erased those things, but only enough to hide them from a human mind. As you grew stronger, your brain lifted the sheet.¡± You were never supposed to find those memories again, I added without saying it. ¡°Sheet? But you said you erased them.¡± ¡°Nothing can ever truly be erased from a mind. It¡¯s like a hard drive¡ªunless you have some pretty high-tech equipment, there¡¯s always an imprint left behind.¡± ¡°Right. So, all those things you showed me about your childhood¡ª¡± ¡°You asked. I answered.¡± She nodded. ¡°Did you want me to hate David?¡± I laughed. Of course I did. I just didn¡¯t want her to learn the hard way what kind of man he was. ¡°It¡¯d be nice if you did. But, no. I did and do want you to know what he¡¯s like, though.¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± Her soft cheeks dropped as her lips sat parted, curiosity lingering beneath a hint of fear for the truth I might offer. She was so perfectly beautiful, so soft and so fragile. I couldn¡¯t imagine how anyone could have slapped her. And then I remembered again¡ªthe way I hit her, the way I screamed at her, threw her, dragged her, hurt her, and made her cry. I¡¯d stepped outside myself when I did that, but no matter how far you step away, when you come back, the truth will always belong to you, and you cannot escape your own memories. I feared for her and her loving soul. She forgave me for an act of depraved cruelty. I knew she¡¯d forgive Mike, and I knew, if David ever slapped her, or locked her away in her room or forced her to wear the clothes he saw fit, she would accept that. She loved him enough to look past anything. ¡°You have such a forgiving heart that, well, now I''m sure you¡¯d forgive David if he struck you in anger, and his strike would not be a tiny slap.¡± ¡°You only say that because you think I''m going to let Mike get away with it.¡± She would. ¡°No, I say that because my brother can seem to do no wrong. I¡¯ve seen him raise his voice at you, and you only blame yourself¡ªtell yourself not to push him. Ara, that¡¯s a recipe for a submissive nineteen-fifties abused housewife. I just don''t want to see you crying on a kitchen floor, punished because the Pavlova sunk and, sweet girl, I wouldn¡¯t put it past him.¡± Because I remembered too clearly the events of days gone by¡ªstories I could never share for fear of breaking her heart¡ªbreaking the mould she thought David fitted. ¡°You don''t think very highly of him, do you?¡± she said, but what she really wanted to say was, You¡¯re just behaving like a jealous brother. ¡°I love my brother. I do. But I know him, inside and out, and he¡¯s old-fashioned. He doesn''t see anything wrong with disciplining his wife. It¡¯s not a personality fault; it¡¯s a time corruption.¡± ¡°He¡¯d never hit me, Jase.¡± I wiped my thumb down her cheek, right where Mike would never have hit her either. ¡°Neither would Mike.¡± She pushed my hand away. ¡°And David would never even do that much.¡± ¡°I hope not. And I hope, if he ever does, you would come to me. You would see it as an error on his part, and not just think yourself the problem.¡± ¡°I wouldn¡¯t. Okay?¡± But she knew she would; she knew she¡¯d take it to her grave because, if he ever struck her in anger, it would be so apparently out of character for him that people would ask what she¡¯d done to provoke him. ¡°I know it might seem like I let him get away with being all controlling and forceful, but if he ever did anything to me that I didn''t like, I¡¯d leave. I have a no-strike policy with men, Jase. If he hits me, even once, he¡¯s gone, because that¡¯s not love.¡± Then how could she love me? ¡°I hit you,¡± I said, and her mind went blank with guilt; she hadn¡¯t thought of that, but my point was made. And made strong. ¡°Jase. Don''t. Okay? Just stop feeling guilty. Look¡ª¡± She couldn¡¯t find the right words, no matter how hard she tried, because she knew, deep down inside, that it was true; I hurt her. She should have expelled me from her life a long time ago for that. ¡°Okay, you hit me, you¡¯re a bastard. I hate you.¡± Her lovely white teeth showed with that special grin she did only when she was being cheeky. Her fangs had grown with the blood of the immortal being constant in her veins now, and they looked so cute on her; so small they were almost like baby teeth. I loved her so much in that moment that the tears I¡¯d held all night, from the first moment I found out what she was planning to do with my uncle, came out from hiding. I didn¡¯t want her to see them. I swiped one away as it fell onto my cheek. ¡°You were just so small and precious.¡± I couldn¡¯t stop it then; the whole thing played out in my mind, forcing me to see the way Arthur touched her. To see her cry and throw up, and as my heart raged with fury, wishing I could skin my uncle, the memory of her face when I struck her, when I tortured her, came rushing back like a punishment. I broke. I had to tell her how I felt. I knew it would only make her pity me. But I needed her to know I never stopped regretting it. ¡°Every strike felt as if you¡¯d snap, shatter, like porcelain. I¡ª¡± I held my hands out as if she was in them, broken, crying for me. I could see her there¡ªsee her in my arms. ¡°I hit as softly as I possibly could, but I¡ª¡± Her fingertips landed in mine, bringing me back, waking me. ¡°Don''t go there anymore. Just, when you think about it, go to a place where we were happy, instead.¡± There were so many places like that; more memories of joy than pain. I flipped my hand over and held hers, knowing it was wrong, but owning her for myself in that moment, despite morals. ¡°Only if I can take you there with me.¡± Her tiny fingers tightened around mine. ¡°I will go anywhere, do anything to make you okay again. It kills me that you¡¯re stuck in that torture without me, Jase. I''m okay. I''m here. I''m alive, and I¡­¡± I knew what she wanted to say. I saw her reach out in her mind and tell me she loved me, but she didn¡¯t say it. ¡°I care about you. A lot,¡± she said instead. ¡°So, please, just¡­just don¡¯t go back there anymore. Move on. Leave it behind where it belongs: in the past.¡± In her mind, as she mentioned the past, she saw a future; she pictured it for a second, with me. Her and I, together, someday, somewhere. But she pulled the thought back, discarding it quickly, because she knew she loved David. But it was enough to cheer me up, just the hope of one day, maybe, making her mine. And suddenly, I found a new reason to live. ¡°See¡ª¡± I shuffled closer, tucking her hair behind her ear to reveal her beautiful face. ¡°This is why I love you. Look how easily you can heal my heart. See how effortless it is for you to take my terrors away.¡± She was everything I¡¯d ever dreamed of, and my deepest regret then was not finding her first. ¡°I just¡­I don''t know where I¡¯d be if I¡¯d not found you.¡± She laughed. ¡°What do you mean?¡± I hadn¡¯t meant to add that bit; it just slipped out, leaving me scrambling for an explanation, knowing it would open my heart to her. ¡°No one has ever cared so much before¡ªto want to take my pain away and see that I dream of things that don''t leave scars when I wake.¡± Her delicate touch stroked my cheek, making me wish I could bear to look away from her perfection for one second just to close my eyes and enjoy the way she felt. ¡°I''m sorry you never found a girl who would see you the way I do.¡± She just didn¡¯t get it. ¡°But I did find one.¡± ¡°Yes.¡± She smiled, but it was completely ruined by the pity in her eyes. ¡°But, I want you to have love, like David and I do. I want you to find your eternal person.¡± ¡°Eternal person?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I laughed. ¡°Well, I found her. I''m just waiting for her to realize we were made for each other, then I get my happy ending.¡± She pulled away. ¡°That won''t happen.¡± ¡°I know.¡± I looked into my lap, holding on to the last of that future I¡¯d seen with her. ¡°But eternity is a very long time. I can hope that, one day, you¡¯ll feel the way I do.¡± Or at least admit it. ¡°If you really do care for me, then you won''t think like that. Because, for all the confusion I have in my heart, I only want David.¡± Page 52 She was right. It was selfish of me to hope she¡¯d fall out of love with David because, for that to happen, he would have to hurt her pretty badly. I took a deep breath and let it out. ¡°Okay. Then I hope you never love me. I hope you and David live eternally happy lives together.¡±Advertisement ¡°Liar.¡± We both laughed. It was kind of irritating to have a person who could read me almost as well as I could read others. But nice at the same time. ¡°I''m trying, Ara. I do want what''s best for you. And if that''s my brother, then, in my heart, he''s who I want you to be with.¡± Even if I will eventually have to kill myself just to ease the pain. ¡°Then you should stop touching me like your girlfriend. If he saw that, he¡¯d be really pissed.¡± ¡°Yeah, I know.¡± I sat back, sliding my hands slowly away from her body to savour the last touch. ¡°Sorry.¡± ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± It wasn¡¯t okay. I needed some distance. She wasn¡¯t wearing anything but a shirt under that sheet, and the instinct-driven man inside me knew that only too well. I moved away and sat on the chair again. ¡°Hey, can I ask you something?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°Why didn''t you demand I give your ring back?¡± She frowned. ¡°I didn''t know that was an option.¡± I scoffed. How was it not? ¡°Ara, you never sit by and let things happen if you don''t approve. If you wanted that ring, you¡¯d have stomped your foot until I gave it to you. So, why didn''t you?¡± She stared at me, realizing it for the first time herself. She didn¡¯t want it back. ¡°You''re reading into it too much.¡± ¡°Am I?¡± I grabbed the ring from my pocket and pressed it into her palm, folding her fingers around it. ¡°Or are you just not telling me what you really think?¡± She slipped the ring back on her finger and rolled away from me, hating herself for the truth she¡¯d just admitted inside. ¡°Go away, Jason. You don''t know anything about me.¡± But I did. I knew I shouldn¡¯t have forced her to see that truth so soon. She wasn¡¯t ready. ¡°Oh, don''t know anything about you, huh?¡± Luckily, I also knew how to cheer her up. I pulled the blanket away from her. ¡°I know your ticklish spot.¡± ¡°No!¡± She squealed, jerking around as I dug my fingers into her ribs. ¡°Stop!¡± I laughed aloud, feeling pure joy for one of the first times in so long. It was the way she laughed¡ªsuch a sweet little giggle, so honest and so unguarded. I could see why my brother loved it so much. She was just so beautifully innocent. I didn¡¯t want her to stop, so I kept tickling, gentle enough not to hurt her but firm enough to hold her down a little so she couldn¡¯t get away. Not that she wanted to get away. She looked up and her heart burned with love for me. This was exactly where we both wanted to be, no matter what the consequence. ¡°See?¡± I pinned both hands beside her face and leaned right down, pretending to be puffed out, knowing how much she loved it when I played human. ¡°I know more about you than anyone else in this world, Ara-Rose. And I know you didn¡¯t ask me for that ring because you liked the fact that I had it. You liked knowing how it made me feel to carry it, as if I owned a part of you my brother never would.¡± ¡°What part?¡± All of you. Your heart, soul, mind, body¡ªfuture. ¡°The truth.¡± She went completely stiff under me. That was all I needed to say, and her mind would fill in the rest. I tried not to laugh. As I moved to kneel back, the warmth off her body¡ªfrom between her legs¡ªbrushed my knee. She was naked beneath this shirt. I knew I shouldn¡¯t look, but my eyes slowly strayed down her waist, past her hips, stopping there where the shirt rose up past her belly button. She let me look. She laid there, legs slightly apart, me kneeling between them, and for that second, she let me look. I held my breath. Everything in the room getting hotter, including Ara. She patterned it out in her thoughts; me and her, making love. The thought stayed small enough that she didn¡¯t even know she thought it, but it was enough to send my heart and my blood into overdrive. I quickly let go of her hand and pulled the shirt down, catching a glimpse of the horror she felt when she remembered Arthur being right where I was. ¡°What happened down there tonight, Ara?¡± ¡°Where?¡± ¡°In the training hall. Why were you down there¡ªpractically naked?¡± Although I already knew the truth, I just wanted her to tell me, but she wasn¡¯t going to, until her thoughts did. I swept her hair off her brow, frowning, pretending I didn¡¯t already know. ¡°Whoa. Ara, you¡¯ve gotta be kidding me.¡± ¡°What?¡± She pretended, too¡ªthat she didn¡¯t know what I¡¯d just seen. The games we play. ¡°That¡¯s what you were doing down there tonight? Arthur? Really?¡± ¡°I¡­¡± She blinked a few extra times, pretending again. But I could play this game as long as she wanted. ¡°You saw that?¡± ¡°Sweet girl, I saw everything.¡± I rested back on my knees, placing my hand to her thigh, my thumb discreetly holding the shirt to cover her so it wouldn¡¯t move if she did. ¡°So that''s what the dagger¡¯s for¡ªthat¡¯s what David wants it for?¡± ¡°And that¡¯s why he hasn''t been coming to see me.¡± She grabbed that damn locket and held it tight. ¡°He can''t bear it. He¡¯s wanted to tell me so badly, but he knows I¡¯ll fight him on it. He¡¯s planning to just disappear.¡± And the game was over. I might have known in her thoughts what she planned to do with my uncle, but this was the first time I¡¯d seen that¡ªseen the pain it caused her, seen the devastation she felt because she knew she couldn¡¯t betray David that way and, in that, she would be sending him to his death. How was that possibly her fault? I landed on top of her, our noses in line. ¡°No.¡± ¡°No, what?¡± I just didn¡¯t know what to say. No, I won¡¯t let you suffer. No, I won¡¯t let you blame yourself. No, I will not, over my dead body, see you sleep with my uncle to save David. I would rather die. I would rather be tortured at my brother¡¯s hands for eternity. ¡°No. I won''t let this happen.¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°I''m not letting you do this to yourself.¡± I knew what I had to do. I knew she knew it too. Without even thinking, I reached down and unfastened her buttons¡ªmy uncle¡¯s buttons. I needed her out of this shirt, his scent off her beautiful body. It was almost enough to make me gag. ¡°I won''t see you suffer my uncle¡¯s touch then hate yourself for the rest of eternity.¡± ¡°I have to.¡± She stopped me. ¡°I can''t lose David.¡± ¡°But you can lose me,¡± I said, and rolled the shirt off her shoulder, seeing her perfect white skin in a completely different light to ever before. I couldn¡¯t think about the fact that she was okay with that¡ªthat, as I said it, she realised what I was going to do and accepted it, because she could accept my death before she could accept David¡¯s. I pushed the thought aside, breaking to tears beneath the external strength. I owed her this. I owed her my pain¡ªknew how it would feel to know that, as I laid between her legs, she wouldn¡¯t be making love to me, but fighting for him. ¡°Jase¡ª¡± She saw it, though. She saw the hurt in my eyes. Her hand slowly came up along my face, and I just wanted to fold into her, cry, tell her I love her, tell her to let him die. Let him go. And you and I will be happy forever. Together. ¡°If you father the heir, you¡¯ll be going to your death.¡± I laughed. ¡°Precisely.¡± ¡°Why would you want that?¡± ¡°You don''t know?¡± She shook her head. ¡°You really have no idea what you are to me, Ara, do you?¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°I¡­¡± So she knew I loved her, but that was it. She couldn¡¯t fathom the depths I would go to for her. And I just didn¡¯t know how to explain it, how to make her see that I would burn in a fire, drown myself in acid, peel my skin back and suffer for eternity to save her from one tear. ¡°It would take a lifetime for me to show you how I feel. There are no words I could find to say it in one breath, and I love you just doesn¡¯t hold enough weight for the feeling I have in my soul that you are everything. You are my life, my breath, my reason to get up, to smile, to live each day. I will never let you go.¡± I touched her soft, rose-petal skin for what might be the last time. ¡°Don''t you see? One day my brother will come back here, and I won''t get to be with you anymore and, eventually, that will kill me anyway.¡± ¡°But, Jase.¡± Her pretty lip quivered. ¡°How can I live in a world without you?¡± She knew the answer to that. She didn¡¯t need to ask. I tore the shirt gently away from her body and tossed it as far from here as it would fly out that balcony door. She was waiting for me to answer, unaware or uncaring that she was completely and finally naked beneath me. She stared up, her eyes so full of questions; so blue with sadness that I knew I had to answer her. ¡°Better than you can live in a world without David.¡± And she broke. She may have known it before, but she only admitted it then, in that second, and she cried. It was only for a moment¡ªonly a few sobs before she stopped and looked up at me, seeing my shirt come away, and pressed her hand to my stomach. ¡°Wait.¡± I looked down at this fragile, sweet girl below me, her milk white skin against the cream sheets, her dark hair, like silk ribbons, spilling out around her face and over the pillow. Her eyes, like sapphires, the pupils so dark and so large with the heat of desire, forced an intake of breath in me¡ªa pause to make this a memory¡ªhold it in my heart for just a while longer. ¡°Will David really hate me if I have a baby to stop him from dying?¡± ¡°He¡¯ll get over it.¡± I ditched my shirt to the end of the bed and fell on my hands over her body, keeping mine off hers enough that I could maintain control of my emotions. ¡°Think of the agony he''s been going through these past few months, probably worrying whose hands he¡¯d be leaving you in once he¡¯s dead.¡± Like mine. It was better this way. He would, eventually, forgive me, and her. I grabbed her hips and slid her down under me so she was in perfect line. ¡°He knows this will happen, he just believes it¡¯ll be when he''s gone, cold in the ground. But it doesn''t have to be that way.¡± Her mind went white with surprise; she thought I¡¯d rather see her suffer the pain of losing him so I could have her for myself. She was dead wrong. ¡°No,¡± I said, answering that thought, even though I knew she hated it when I did that. ¡°Not sad¡ªnot eternally grieving him, Ara. If you really do love him more than me, then you will not ever be happy again if he dies.¡± I reached down and unzipped my jeans. ¡°We¡¯re doing this. I''m giving you my child, and I will die happy, knowing that I at least left a part of myself behind¡ªin you.¡± Page 53 She didn¡¯t have anything to say. I waited for a second to see if she wanted to back out. But she didn¡¯t. She wanted this.Advertisement She wanted my death. She wanted him. I pulled my jeans past my hips, floating off the bed for a second while I yanked them away with my boots and socks inside the legs, and as the air touched my skin, my knees, my thighs, it came with the warmth off her beautiful body. I felt as if our skin was touching before I even fell back down between her legs. And as I laid myself there, where only my brother should be, her thoughts changed. I expected her to be tense, unwilling, maybe even push me away, but she looked up, and her heart beat once, steadying itself, her soul crying out inside her for this to happen, making her eyes electric blue¡ªthe static in her fingers charge everything with energy. She wanted me. Not him. Not Mike. Me. And I was going to take full advantage of that. She would be the last girl I ever loved before I died, and I wanted to enjoy her as if she was mine. So many things I always dreamed of doing to her¡ªso many things I had one last chance to do. ¡°I''m sorry, but ¡­while I have you completely naked, I''m gonna do something I''ve wanted to do for a long time.¡± Her eyes went to my lips, as if she knew what I was thinking. ¡°What¡¯s that?¡± I sent her an image of my plan, raising my brows. ¡°Kiss you somewhere naughty.¡± Her mouth popped open in obvious shock, and I laughed as I moved down on the bed, tracing every one of her perfect curves with my lips on the way. I stopped above her ribs, where the cursive line of her Promise remained from her Walk of Faith. ¡°This,¡± I said, kissing the Mark, ¡°looks incredibly sexy on you.¡± ¡°I''m not sure I fit in a sentence with the word sexy,¡± she scoffed. ¡°Tell that to my body.¡± Her cheeks flushed with the idea of what she might make me feel¡ªlittle, plain, ordinary, unattractive Ara¡ªher too-thin body under this man who was cute and carefree, with a sexy tattoo around his firm arm and a tanned chest bigger than her husband¡¯s. She compared herself to Emily in that breath, wondering if I thought Emily had a better body, or if I even compared them¡ªor if I¡¯d ever even slept with Emily. I hadn¡¯t. I wanted to laugh. She just had no idea¡ªcould not conceive the depth of my want for her¡ªhow I loved her, needed her, purely because she was my Ara. Fat, thin, short hair, no hair, zits or warts or scars. I loved her. I wanted her flat against me so badly I couldn¡¯t exhale the tightness in my chest away. She could feel the heat coming off me, but she couldn¡¯t feel the intensity¡ªthe way the lust burned through me worse than the fire that melted my skin in my 1942 plane crash. I was harder than I¡¯d ever been, more wanting than I ever wanted to be again, and as my lips went past that permanent tan line above her absent undies and onto the soft patch of hair between her legs, she flooded, too: heat and moisture spilling against my lips like melting chocolate. My brother clearly had never done this to her before, and as my tongue slipped inside, like she was some soft, ripe fruit, tasting the milky smooth sweetness of this girl I¡¯d loved for so, so long, she moaned, crying out my name. My name. I¡¯d brought her heartache and pain. I¡¯d damaged her body, her soul, but as I gently slipped my finger inside, reaching up to where the muscles tightened, I was finally the one bringing her pleasure. Her spine arched, pushing her closer to my mouth, and I worried for a second that the stubble on my chin might scratch her, but as I checked her thoughts, she clearly didn¡¯t mind. Her legs parted further and she held her breath, trying to be quiet but not really succeeding, and each time I rubbed that delicate spot then kissed her gently after, she wanted to shake inside, not sure whether to laugh, cry, squirm or run. I saw a flash of blue spark her fingertips as I looked up for second, but she pinned her hands under her pillow, hiding it. And my mind raced with questions. For some reason, that spark caused no pain, no shock when it flared in this situation. I felt it warm her toes against the bottoms of my legs, but it didn¡¯t hurt¡ªnot one bit. ¡°What¡¯s funny?¡± I asked when she giggled. ¡°That kind of tickles.¡± I laughed, pressing my wet lips into her belly, moving firm kisses over each rib, all the way up to her breasts. They were so soft, so full, fit so perfectly into my hands, and I wanted to tell her that I¡¯d never seen such purity in a girl¡ªthe pale pink of her nipple, the way it set so softly into her milk-white skin, like she was some kind of angel or white blossom I had plucked from the Garden of Eden. I traced a gentle line around it and let my tongue follow, drawing the fullness into my mouth for one sweet kiss before burying my face in her jaw, coming finally to rest my open mouth on hers. It was too much for her. She¡¯d wanted this for too long. She reached down and I jumped as her small hands touched me, slid me closer to the Threshold of No Return. ¡°Not yet.¡± I grabbed her hand. ¡°Argh! You¡¯re killing me!¡± I laughed against her mouth, too afraid to move away in case the kiss ended. It was perfect this way, as if my heart was finally filled with the blood it needed to survive. And our lips wanted nothing more than to stay together¡ªcomfortable, warm, and familiar. I¡¯d kissed many girls before, and none of them felt this right. I just wanted to hold on and never let her go. I loved her. And it was as simple as that. No matter what I¡¯d done or would ever do to hurt her, I loved her. She moved her knees, lifting them up, wrapping her legs around me, and I could no longer bear it. I slipped my hand between her legs and guided myself inside her, thrusting a little harder than I meant to. But she cried only with pleasure, her heart feeling what mine did: free, complete. I could see it in her thoughts. She tangled her fingers in my hair, using all her strength to hold me close. ¡°You okay?¡± I asked, laughing into the curve of her neck. ¡°I just¡­¡± David was never that passionate. ¡°I''m okay.¡± So she liked it a little rougher. I looked down at her, smiling as I moved my hips against hers with a little more force, hearing our flesh clap each time it met. I needed to be closer, but I couldn¡¯t pump that way if our chests were touching, so I slowed things down and laid my body atop hers, resting my jaw on her brow, feeling her soft breath warm against my throat. There was a kind of energy between us, surrounding us, that felt solid, like we were grounded by a force outside our awareness. She leaned down and kissed the Mark on my arm softly, closing her eyes as she remembered the first time she saw it by the lake that day¡ªhow much she loved me even then. ¡°Jase?¡± ¡°Yeah?¡± ¡°I love you.¡± I stopped and drew back to look down at her, dead shocked. I never ever thought she¡¯d have the strength to admit that to me¡ªnot in a million years. ¡°I love you, too, Ara. For forever,¡± I said, then quickly kissed her mouth. ¡°And I will die loving you.¡± She rolled back, closing her eyes for a second as my words entered her heart and soul, killing her a little. I couldn¡¯t look. I didn¡¯t want to see her suffer for my death, then reason that it was better than losing David. Then again, maybe I deserved to see it. I looked down to where our bodies connected, watching myself go inside her, the gentle curve of her waist and the soft white flesh on her belly colouring my peripheral. She was so petite; hips small enough to wrap my hands around, her thighs almost too bony, the joints showing where her legs parted¡ªonly a soft, small handful of flesh covering it, quivering each time I brushed against her. I wanted to bite her there¡ªcould almost taste the memory in the back of my throat; could still see remnants of the scar I left on the night I tried to turn her. But she wasn¡¯t thinking about that. She was ready. Her body getting hotter and wetter. I wasn¡¯t sure if she¡¯d felt an orgasm before, but I was hell-bent on making sure this was one she¡¯d never forget. I leaned back a little and licked my thumb before pressing it to the most sensitive spot a guy can ever touch a girl. And she swore, her body almost freezing with shock. Clearly, David had never ventured to this realm, either. ¡°What is that?¡± she said, way too loud. I looked over at her door, smiling. ¡°Clitoral stimulation.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± I laughed. Such a sweet innocent thing she was. Her eyes met mine, and past the obvious pleasure she was feeling, I saw curiosity. She wondered why I was smiling that way, what I found so funny. But it wasn¡¯t amusement, not at her expense anyway. I was just happy. Happy to be here, with her, feeling her this way. I felt her tighten inside. And her mind told me to move left, when I knew I needed to move right. I shifted my thumb, making softer circles, pressing firmer each time she groaned, and when the tightening reached the highest point inside her, I let go, thrusting myself toward it, falling down hard on top of her. Moisture flooded between us, making everything deliciously wet, scented with her sweet smell. She could hardly breathe, hardly focus on anything, and her fingernails went deep into my ribs, cutting, her legs firmly around my hips, pulling me into place, holding me exactly where she wanted me. And I let go¡ªfelt myself release, emptying every ounce of love, lust, desire, pain, sorrow, regret and longing into her, imagining my life force race through, deeper and deeper to a place where miracles happened and life was conceived. We were one. One soul. One heart. One love. Forever. A lifetime of eternity folded out in the seconds before us, and she was mine for all that time. I saw it all¡ªthe future, the past, the world that could and never would be. I was not in it. And a part of me wondered, as much as it hoped, that she would not move on from me¡ªshe would not be okay without me, because I knew that each day that would pass until my death, I would not be okay without her. A threshold had been crossed, and I never wanted to go back to before. Back to wondering what life would be like loving her. I¡¯d tasted it now, and I would never again be the same. I could feel her fragile body beneath mine, feel her tight and warm around me, feel every move, every twitch inside her, but the only thing my heart focused on was her hand against my chest, placed there so absently; a touch of love, her thin fingers so precious and delicate, so fiery and dangerous, so sweetly and wonderfully mine. I closed my eyes and focused on our last seconds together before all this would end. If I could have taken her life in that breath and given mine at the same time, and it would¡¯ve meant we¡¯d stay like this forever, I would have. ¡°Ara.¡± I slipped my hand beneath her spine and rolled her body up, cradling her face to my chest, feeling her soft, lustful breaths brush my bare skin as tears fell past my lashes and into her hair. ¡°I wish I could hold onto you like this forever.¡± She kissed my chest, running a finger over the wet spot her lips left, then wrapped herself around me so tightly I held my own breath. I never wanted her to let go, but I knew it was time. I knew the heat would die down any second now, allowing room for regret, fear, concern¡­sorrow. Page 54 ¡°Jase?¡±Advertisement I shuffled back, slipping out of her. ¡°Yeah?¡± ¡°This won''t make it okay.¡± My gut sunk. ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°I mean¡­I love him. I really do, and I¡­I can see his face. I can see the way he¡¯ll look at me when I tell him the baby¡¯s yours.¡± She shut her eyes around that thought. ¡°Shh.¡± I kissed her eye, running my thumb over her lashes. ¡°It¡¯s okay. We¡¯ll tell him together.¡± ¡°No.¡± She looked up at me. ¡°We can''t. He needs to be free to have an emotional reaction. He can''t do that with you there¡ªwith anyone else there.¡± I sat back a little more. ¡°It¡¯s his emotional reaction I''m worried about, Ara.¡± ¡°He won''t hurt me, Jase.¡± ¡°Then you don''t know him very well.¡± ¡°Or maybe you don''t.¡± I moved back when she shoved me and slid out of bed. ¡°Stop always thinking the worst of him.¡± ¡°Ara, I¡¯ve seen it. I''ve goddamn well seen him hit a girl before.¡± I stood beside her, wishing I could touch her, make her see reason. ¡°Why won''t you listen to me?¡± ¡°Because it¡¯s irrelevant, Jason.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Look what we did.¡± She pointed at the bed. ¡°We betrayed him. We loved each other in his bed. He¡¯d be right to hurt me for that, Jason.¡± I ran forward and gently grabbed her arm. ¡°No, Ara. He wouldn''t.¡± ¡°Just get off me.¡± She shrugged away. ¡°I don''t want this anymore. I don''t want the confusion.¡± ¡°It¡¯s not confusing, Ara. You love me. You said it yourself.¡± I tired to touch her again, but she pushed me away. ¡°No. I don''t want this! I don''t want to love you!¡± she screamed. Her words moved across space and time, coming to rest in the deepest, most tender part of my heart; she meant that. I stood taller, scanning her thoughts, feeling the ache go deeper, appearing in salty pools in my eyes when the confirmation only stared back at me again and again. She meant that. She may have loved me, but it wasn¡¯t what she wanted. She sent the thought to me, standing strong, looking so beautiful and perfectly pale there, completely naked in front of me, that I refused to believe it. ¡°Ara, I can''t read you right now,¡± my voice shook. ¡°I need you to tell me you don''t really mean that.¡± Her lip quivered as she looked into my eyes, and I felt her soul break free of her heart¡ªfelt this icy rush of agony tear through her. She sunk to her knees and covered her head. She looked so small and fragile and ¡­hurt. I hurt her. Again. And again. And again. ¡°I don''t know what I feel,¡± she said. ¡°I just need you to go. I just need to be alone.¡± ¡°Sure. Okay.¡± I grabbed my jeans and slipped my legs into them, my heart breaking so deep I grabbed a pillow off the floor instead of my shirt. ¡°I¡¯ll uh¡ª¡± I wanted to say I¡¯ll see you later, but I wasn¡¯t sure I would. I wasn¡¯t sure she would ever look at me again, nor was I sure I could hang around to see her hate me tomorrow. I opened the door and took one last look at that broken, beautiful girl, and closed it behind me, checking the corridor for onlookers. The halls, the rooms, every corner of the manor was more isolated, more unbearably empty that morning than any day I¡¯d ever spent alone or in pain. I walked slowly back to my room, holding my breath and her pillow to my chest, my jeans hanging low down my hips, the rest of my clothes tucked under my arm. I¡¯d just spent the most wonderful night of my life in the arms of the only girl I would ever love, and today, I would mourn that mistake. I stood outside the dream, watching Jason through my own eyes again, and when I blinked, saw myself sitting on the floor in my room. My naked body flickered with blue light each time I heaved the sadness from my lungs. But I didn¡¯t stay there. I rose, covered my body with a thin nightdress, and tiptoed from the room. ¡°Where are you going?¡± I asked myself, but she didn¡¯t hear. And I no longer felt like this was just a dream. It was too real. I felt the air, the chill, the tears fall from her eyes and down my own cheeks¡ªfelt the wind whip my hair out then, coming off the ocean in a violent swirl. A storm raged above us, making the lighthouse we were suddenly standing on feel rocky and unstable. I bent at the knees, reaching both hands out as if to grab on to something, but she didn¡¯t. She stood at the cusp of the roof, her toes hanging over the abyss, her heart-shaped locket in an outstretch hand. ¡°What are you doing?¡± I yelled over the wind. She didn¡¯t answer. She didn¡¯t need to. Both this girl of the past and the one of the future knew what came next. Her hand opened, releasing the locket a second before she threw herself over the edge. ¡°No!¡± I jumped for her, but I missed, and her thick dark hair slipped through my fingers, following her to the rocky depths beneath. ¡°What have you done, Ara? Please¡ªplease let this just be a bad dream.¡± But it wasn¡¯t a dream. I knew, as I looked over the edge and saw David lift her in his arms, fall to his knees and cradle her mangled body to his chest, that all this had already happened. I slept with Jason, loved him as I¡¯d never loved any man before, and I threw myself off this lighthouse because I didn¡¯t want to face that pain. I didn¡¯t want to love him. Months had gone by since that day, and things had changed so much that everything David and I once were had now become something new¡ªbuilt on something entirely different to what our love had been built on before. I didn¡¯t want to lose that. I didn¡¯t want to be that girl who died for the pain of loving two men equally. I wasn¡¯t her anymore. ¡°Let her die.¡± I stood in the field as David carried her toward the manor. ¡°David, you won¡¯t love her anymore. Please don¡¯t cry for her.¡± I wanted to reach out and make him okay. I wanted to touch him and let him see what she¡¯d become¡ªshow him what she¡¯d done with his brother while he was searching for a way to save their future child. ¡°And now you see,¡± she said, standing beside me in the air of the stilled morning¡ªthe trees in the field unmoving, the breeze having retreated with the storm almost as quickly as it came. ¡°This is why I jumped.¡± ¡°It wasn¡¯t enough,¡± I said. ¡°You can¡¯t die.¡± ¡°I know.¡± She clutched the bloodied edges of her nightgown. ¡°But, I¡¯m not going back to my body.¡± ¡°They¡¯ll make you,¡± I said. ¡°How do you know?¡± ¡°Because it already happened.¡± We both looked off to the manor then, and everything went pitch black. I opened my eyes to the dawn touching my room¡ªmy fingers tangled around the sheets under me, and took a few heavy breaths, trying to compose myself. But I couldn¡¯t. I¡¯d slept with Jason. That feeling¡ªthe empty feeling like I¡¯d forgotten something¡ªthat was it. All this time, my heart was trying to tell me what I¡¯d done. I sat up and hugged my knees, folding myself into a small ball at the head of my bed. It was all just too late. My love for David had changed, and far outweighed what I felt for Jason now. But the damage had been done, and couldn¡¯t be repaired or clouded by a stolen memory. I was a monster¡ªnot fit for this world, not fit to be queen, and certainly not fit to be David¡¯s wife. The sun rose and fell again. My door opened, faces came and went, stared at me, touched me, talked at me, but I ignored them all, even Jason, who squatted by my side, brushed his fingertips over my hairline then stiffened all over. He knew. He saw that I¡¯d had the dream¡ªsaw that the block he¡¯d put in place wasn¡¯t strong enough to keep my inquisitive mind out if it was searching for something. Problem was before was, I just didn¡¯t know I needed to be searching for something. But he should have guarded his own dreams with more care, knowing I could sometimes enter them. And then again, maybe he meant for me to find that one. Maybe he was just tired of carrying that burden on his own. He sat down beside me and said nothing for the longest time, and I didn¡¯t mind his company. In a few days, we¡¯d be separated for good. It had to be that way. In this short time David and I were allowed to be together, free of restrictions, I¡¯d grown to love him greater than I ever imagined possible. And if I was going to lose that now, I never wanted to see another man, or feel another happy feeling, as long as I lived. ¡°I wanted to tell him, Ara,¡± Jason said. ¡°I just didn¡¯t want to destroy your last few months together.¡± ¡°You wouldn¡¯t have,¡± I whispered, and he was so shocked I spoke that he gasped, coming up on his knees. ¡°Once he finds out,¡± I added, ¡°he won¡¯t have a reason to die for me anymore.¡± I heard him sigh my name out, but when I looked up, the sun was suddenly gone and so was Jason. ¡°Ara, please?¡± Morg stood in front of me like some sour-faced old hag at a nursing home, jamming a plate in my face. ¡°You haven¡¯t eaten for two days. Just. . .¡± ¡°Go away,¡± I said numbly, my face dry and sore from tears. ¡°Fine. I will. But you can¡¯t keep this up. David¡¯s called three times. He¡¯s¡ª¡± ¡°Call him.¡± My eyes met hers, and the blackness of her pupils expanded. ¡°Call him, tell him to come home.¡± ¡°Okay, but. . .¡± She looked down at her phone. ¡°Why?¡± The tears spilled out over my cheeks then, without having filed a request. ¡°Just tell him to come home.¡± ¡°Tell him yourself.¡± She held the phone to my ear. I heard his breath, heard him ask Morgaine several times what was wrong with Ara, but I couldn¡¯t speak. I couldn¡¯t tell him over the phone. I wasn¡¯t even sure I could actually find the words to say it. He let out a long, soft sigh. ¡°My love? Is that you?¡± ¡°Please come home,¡± I whispered. ¡°Ara, I can¡¯t. Look, if this is about the dagger, I swear I¡¯m not planning t¡ª¡± ¡°Just come home!¡± I screamed down the line, hearing David''s short gasp before I threw the phone at Morgaine. She caught it, her eyes white with shock, and gently stuffed it in her pocket, taking backward steps until she closed my bedroom door behind her. I heard his voice down the hall. I heard Falcon brief him on the ¡®situation¡¯ as they stood outside my door. My heart beat in my throat, knowing what would come next¡ªknowing how my world would come undone like a loose thread, and there would never be any way to wind it back together again. The door opened and David just stood there for a second, taking in this form on the mattress¡ªall cuddled up to the bed-head, her face probably red and swollen. He squatted down by the bed, reaching out for my leg. Page 55 ¡°No! Don''t touch me.¡± I backed away, making myself smaller.Advertisement ¡°My love, you¡¯re scaring me.¡± He moved closer, stopping when I shrunk away again. ¡°Please. What happened?¡± ¡°I . . . I. . .¡± I sobbed. ¡°Aw, Ara?¡± he said, half laughing, cupping my chin. ¡°Sweetheart, just tell me what it is and we¡¯ll fix it. Please?¡± I shook my head. ¡°You can¡¯t fix it, David.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± He laughed again. ¡°Maybe we can¡¯t. But I can at least make you feel better. Come here¡ª¡± He reached for me but I jerked away and looked up¡ªlooked him right in the eye, holding back all the tears, the self-pity, the quivering lip. He didn¡¯t need to, nor would he want to see it. ¡°David. . .¡± The world stopped. ¡°I slept with Jason.¡± His smile widened, a breathy laugh escaping through it before his eyes darkened and he slowly looked down at the ground. ¡°You did what?¡± I wanted so badly to say I was sorry. I was sorry. But that was the last thing he¡¯d want me to say, and I was sure it would result in his hand across my face. ¡°I slept with Jason.¡± He stood up. ¡°When?¡± My gaze travelled past him to the five figures standing stunned and still in the room behind him. I closed my eyes, hiding from the ache in theirs. I hadn¡¯t heard any of them¡ªnot one of them walk in the room. ¡°David?¡± Jason stepped forward, but Falcon grabbed him by the arms, holding him in place at command of a single pointed finger from David. ¡°Just let me explain.¡± ¡°Do. Not,¡± David said, angling his face away. ¡°Speak.¡± ¡°But she¡ª¡± ¡°I said, shut up.¡± The cool in David¡¯s voice sent shivers through my body. He turned and looked at me. ¡°Get her up. Get her on her feet.¡± Blade gently hoisted me to stand by my arm; my legs tingled where the blood rushed back into them after so many hours sitting in the same position, and my feet went so numb Blade pulled me closer to hold me upright. ¡°You okay?¡± he asked, but I didn¡¯t answer. My eyes were locked onto David, gauging his every move against my expectations. I shouldn¡¯t have been afraid, because anything he chose to do to me would be fair. But I was scared as hell anyway. ¡°Mike?¡± David said. Mike looked up from his hands where he¡¯d fallen to sit on the coffee table. ¡°I¡ª¡± ¡°Did you know?¡± He couldn¡¯t even speak. He was completely lost for words, and I couldn''t decipher what I saw in his eyes¡ªthe hurt, the anger, the worry¡ªwhether it was for what I¡¯d done, or for what David had the legal right to do next. ¡°How long ago?¡± David looked at me. ¡°The lighthouse.¡± He folded forward ever so slightly. ¡°That¡¯s why you were out there? That¡¯s how you fell?¡± I nodded. ¡°And . . . what? You . . . you were just gonna. . .¡± ¡°She didn¡¯t know.¡± Jason took a step forward, stopped instantly by Falcon. ¡°I erased it.¡± David just nodded, his jaw so tight his cheeks hollowed. ¡°That¡¯s real fucking convenient, isn''t it?¡± ¡°It had to be that way,¡± Jason said softly. ¡°She couldn¡¯t carry the burden.¡± ¡°The burden?¡± David said, pointing at me. ¡°The burden is hers to carry. She . . . oh god!¡± He dropped both hands to his knees, catching his breath. ¡°I can have you both stoned for this. Do you know that?¡± ¡°Among other things,¡± Falcon added, looking at me with that stern disapproval he¡¯d seemed to have traded for friendship over the last few months. It was all destroyed now. Everything. All the faith they had in me, just gone, like sudden death. ¡°Just. . .¡± David stood tall again. ¡°Just get out. Everyone.¡± No one moved. ¡°I said out!¡± he screamed, grabbing my arm as I went to pass. ¡°Not you.¡± ¡°David.¡± Mike¡¯s hand came down on David¡¯s wrist, making a tight grip as he forced it off me. ¡°I¡¯m not leaving her¡ª¡± ¡°You will do as you are told, or I will have you whipped.¡± ¡°Go ahead. I¡¯m not afraid of a lashing.¡± He stood halfway between David and I. ¡°You might be the king, but she is still my best friend, and I will not leave her at your mercy.¡± ¡°Then I officially relieve you of your duties.¡± He walked over and opened my door, leaning out to look down the corridor. ¡°Guards!¡± Mike took a step back, his eyes holding the deepest, most feared apology. ¡°Arrest him for violation of matrimonial rights.¡± ¡°David, please? Don¡¯t take this out on¡ª¡± ¡°Silence.¡± He pointed right in my face. ¡°Or this gets worse for all of you.¡± I backed down, shaking my head at Mike. ¡°It¡¯s okay, Ara,¡± he said, laying both hands behind his back as the guard cuffed him. ¡°It¡¯ll be okay.¡± ¡°Not for her, it won¡¯t,¡± David said coldly, and before Mike could react, his eyes going wide, his foot lifting only an inch to move toward me, the guard cupped his chin and the back of his head, twisting until his neck snapped and he went down hard. ¡°No!¡± David¡¯s arm shot out and blocked me off. ¡°Stay away.¡± ¡°He¡¯ll be okay, Ara,¡± Blade said, dragging me backward. ¡°He¡¯ll recover from that.¡± ¡°That wasn¡¯t fair.¡± I hid my face in my hands. ¡°He was just trying to protect me.¡± ¡°And the same fate awaits anyone else with any stupid ideas,¡± David said, turning to me. ¡°You are entitled to the protection the law allows, Ara. Nothing more. And it does not protect you from me.¡± ¡°And what about Jason?¡± I asked. David¡¯s eyes darkened, his lips parting to say something, when Falcon cut in, his knuckles going white where they fought to restrain Jason. ¡°Orders, Majesty.¡± ¡°Throw him in a cell.¡± David waved his hand at them. ¡°I¡¯ll deal with him later.¡± ¡°Yes, Your Majesty.¡± Falcon bowed. ¡°David, please,¡± Jason begged. ¡°Please. Do what you want to me, but don¡¯t touch her. She¡¯s ca¡ª¡± ¡°Blade,¡± David ordered. ¡°See that Falcon gets him to the cell without incident.¡± ¡°As you will it.¡± Blade bowed his head, obeying, but his soul and heart would never be at David¡¯s command. He looked Jason in the eye, muttering an apology, and twisted his arm up behind his back. ¡°Let me go!¡± Jason yelled. ¡°Blade, you know what he¡¯ll do.¡± ¡°You can¡¯t protect her, mate,¡± Blade said, his voice strained with the fight. ¡°None of us can.¡± But Jason wouldn¡¯t give this up, not even for his friend. Limbs tangled and blurred between them, like cars moving fast down a freeway, the rest of us watching on, just waiting for the uneven odds to work in someone¡¯s favour. ¡°Ara, just run,¡± Jason screamed. ¡°Just¡ª¡± ¡°Oh, for God¡¯s sake,¡± Morgaine groaned, tossing the dagger from her belt to Blade. ¡°Just shut him up.¡± ¡°Got it.¡± He caught it with one hand, forcing his arm down over Falcon¡¯s as they slammed Jason face first into the doorframe, pining him there. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, mate. This is gonna hurt me a lot more than it¡¯ll hurt you.¡± Jason cried out, the dagger slipping between the bones in his neck, paralysing him to submission in one strike. ¡°No!¡± I screamed, but the door slammed shut on the empty room. ¡°Don¡¯t cry for him,¡± David ordered, shoving my hand down from my mouth. ¡°Don¡¯t you dare shed one tear for him, Ara. He will get more than a dagger to the spine when I¡¯m done with him.¡± I let my hands fall to my sides, my fists tight. ¡°If you touch one hair on his head, I¡ª¡± ¡°You¡¯ll what?¡± He moved in, startling me with the speed of which he came up. ¡°You¡¯ll what, Ara? Leave? Good. Fuck him to hurt me? Already done that, so what else can you do? What else can you possibly do that¡¯s going to make me give two ounces of shit?¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± My mouth hung open, nothing coming out. ¡°I don¡¯t know how to deal with this, Ara,¡± he said, his voice softer than before. ¡°I don¡¯t know what to do with you¡ªwhat to say, what to feel. I¡ª¡± He touched his chest, swallowing like his throat had narrowed, and sat down on his side of the bed¡ªhis head in hands. ¡°David? I don¡¯t know, either. I¡ª¡± ¡°Don¡¯t talk. If you know what¡¯s good for you, do not let one word come out of that fucking slut mouth of yours.¡± I was so taken back by those words that I forgot everything I planned to say. The silence lingered in the room for so long then. I tried not to breathe, not to do anything that would alter the pattern of his thoughts. My life, and Jason¡¯s life, rested on his decisions right now, and he was so clearly hurt I was sure he was capable of anything, even carrying out my punishment himself. ¡°It¡¯s over,¡± he said suddenly in the quietest breath, as if the very notion had just struck him, bringing down all the realisation of the lonely centuries to come on top of it. ¡°I know,¡± I whispered, but it was so low he wouldn¡¯t really have heard it. ¡°You made a promise, Ara. That¡¯s it. I trusted you, believed you. I. . .¡± He stood up and faced me, touching his chest. ¡°I gave you the one part of myself I never ever gave to anyone else because I believed you would hold it sacred, protect it, cherish it like I did yours. I would never have hurt you that way, Ara. Never in a million years.¡± ¡°I know.¡± I sobbed, sucking the streaming tears from lip. ¡°And I loved you too, I¡ª¡± ¡°But my eternal love just wasn¡¯t enough for you, was it? And who¡¯s the fool?¡± His voice broke. ¡°It¡¯s not you, is it? No.¡± He shook his head. ¡°It¡¯s me. I¡¯m the fool. I¡¯m the one stupid enough to believe this was real¡ªthat anything outside death, murder, hatred, loneliness was real.¡± ¡°It was real.¡± I stepped a little closer. ¡°No, it was stupid. All of it.¡± He laughed, closing his eyes. ¡°And I knew it from the start. What did I say to you that day, Ara¡ªwhat did I say the day I left you in the hospital?¡± ¡°All dreams eventually die,¡± I muttered, seeing his face¡ªthe way he loved me back then¡ªso different to how he looked at me now. Because, now, he really believed those words. ¡°I should have listened to my own wisdom then. I should never have given everything up for you. I left my Set, I¡ª¡± ¡°You didn¡¯t give up the Set for me. You gave it up because justice failed you, and¡ª¡± Page 56 ¡°Is that what you think?¡± he asked, incredulous. ¡°Is that what you honestly think?¡±Advertisement I nodded. ¡°Then you¡¯re even stupider than I thought, Ara.¡± ¡°Or maybe there¡¯s just always been this miscommunication between us.¡± I reached for him. ¡°Don¡¯t touch me.¡± He jerked away. ¡°Do you think I want you to touch me?¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry. Just. . .¡± ¡°Just what? What should I do, Ara? You tell me, because I¡ª¡± His eyes drifted off to one side, coated thickly with tears. ¡°I just don¡¯t know anymore. I . . . for the first time in my life, I just . . . I got no answers.¡± ¡°You just need to think, to¡ª¡± ¡°Think about what?¡± He offered both palms. ¡°You won. What d¡¯you want from me?¡± ¡°I want you to stay. I want you to think about things before you leave.¡± ¡°Why?¡± His shoulders lifted once¡ªhis heart completely breaking under the stern gaze he tried to hold. ¡°It¡¯s all gone. I was wrong. I . . . I had this idea in my head. God!¡± He tapped his temple a few times, folding over. ¡°Why didn¡¯t I just listen? I should have known love like that was too good to be true. And I believed it, Ara. I did. I believed it to my core¡ªto the point where I was blinded enough to actually think the feelings you had for my brother were plutonic¡ªthat it was just confusion or maybe that he felt more for you than you did for him. I never¡ª¡± He paused and looked out the window, sniffing once. ¡°I never, for one second, believed you actually loved him, that you could actually. . .¡± His voice broke and his hand came up to cover his mouth. ¡°You couldn¡¯t have known, David. And you shouldn¡¯t have even had to imagine it was possible.¡± ¡°But I should¡¯ve seen it.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t blame yourself. It¡ª¡± ¡°I don¡¯t. I blame you. And I blame him. And you are goddamn well lucky you told me, Ara, because I¡¯d found out for myself, I¡¯d have beaten you to death with my own hands.¡± My heart skipped a beat, restarting again a little faster. ¡°You¡¯re hurt, David. I get that. But I don¡¯t believe you¡¯re capable of murder.¡± Very slowly, and with what looked like hesitation wrought with an awful lot of anger, he moved his gaze onto me, rolling his shoulders back so he stood as tall and strong as a king¡ªhis uniform broadening his shoulders, the sword in his belt glistening in the afternoon sun, as if whispering its evil will. ¡°I¡¯m the king,¡± he said, seeming to find the meaning in those words only as he spoke them. ¡°You are guilty of treason, and I have a duty to uphold.¡± ¡°David, please. It¡ª¡± ¡°Don¡¯t! Say. A word, Ara.¡± He turned to the window, his lips fighting their own battle with his thoughts. ¡°I¡¯m not going to charge you with this crime because, right now, the monarchy is unstable, and your people need an honest, strong queen.¡± My throat opened with the sudden breath of shock. I covered my mouth. ¡°Even if it is a lie,¡± he said, his lip turned in disgust. He held my gaze for a second, then made a very stiff, very slow about-face and walked away, closing the door gently behind him. Chapter Eleven I opened my door and Falcon stepped into sight, his head hung low. ¡°Go away, Falcon.¡± I pushed past him. ¡°I have nothing to say to you.¡± ¡°It wasn¡¯t what you think, Ara.¡± I stopped dead and spun around to face him, my words coming out through my teeth. ¡°Do not address me in such an informal manner. You are a soldier in the Queen¡¯s Guard, and¡ª¡± ¡°And I acted as such.¡± ¡°No. You sided with the king. You did his bidding. You¡ª¡± ¡°I did what I had to to protect you, Ara,¡± he yelled, then stood taller, sobering himself. ¡°Under the laws of the Lilithian Monarchy, you and all your guard are bound by the sacred right of matrimony. We cannot go against your betrothed. How he sees fit to punish you is out of our control. He could place you over his knee and spank you right in front of us, and we can¡¯t do a goddamn thing.¡± ¡°What? But. . .¡± My eyes flicked over every inch of Falcon¡¯s face. ¡°That¡¯s ridiculous.¡± ¡°Which is exactly why Blade and I have spent the better part of this morning amending those laws. There was never need for a bylaw that gives a guard the power to protect his queen from her own husband. It just hasn¡¯t been done in this monarchy before, and we never imagined it would. I¡¯m sorry. I know we let you down, but even if that hadn¡¯t been the case, I still would¡¯ve arrested Jason.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because he¡¯d have gotten you both killed. If he¡¯d stepped in and tried to defend you, the king absolutely would have lost his temper. Why do you think Blade was so quick to knock Jason out, Ara?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± He touched my shoulder. ¡°The best thing for you, for all of us, was to get Jason out of sight.¡± ¡°But you left me alone with him¡ªnot knowing what he¡¯d do to me.¡± ¡°No. I never¡ª¡± He slashed his pointed finger through the air, ¡°¡ªnot for one instant, left you alone with him. As soon as Blade had everything under control, I was outside, on your balcony, making sure he did nothing to hurt you.¡± I softened, dropping back on my heels. ¡°Really?¡± His lips pursed to hold his jaw tight, and I saw the faintest shimmer in his eyes. ¡°What kind of man do you think I am?¡± I folded my arms. ¡°I guess I just don¡¯t really know who I can trust anymore.¡± ¡°You can trust me.¡± He stepped closer. ¡°If the king had so much as even thought about raising a hand to you, I¡¯d have smashed that glass door and been under his fist before it struck your face, Ara, even though, to do so, would mean I faced the death sentence.¡± ¡°The death sentence?¡± ¡°That¡¯s the punishment for acting against the king¡¯s sacred rights.¡± ¡°You¡¯d go to that length for me?¡± I said, half laughing as though it was preposterous. He grabbed my arm again. ¡°I am sworn by my own blood to protect you. But even if I undid that oath, Ara, I would still die for you.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Believe it or not, I care about you. You¡ª¡± He cleared his throat. ¡°In truth, you remind me of someone I lost many years ago.¡± ¡°Who?¡± ¡°Annie,¡± he said, moistening his lips. ¡°My little sister.¡± ¡°I didn¡¯t know you ever had a sister.¡± He smiled fondly. ¡°She was just as naive and pigheaded as you, but I loved her, Ara. And I . . . I don¡¯t want to admit it, but I goddamn well love you too¡ªas if you were my own sister.¡± I just about melted into a puddle of reverence on the floor, but I reached out and hugged Falcon instead. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Fal. How did she die?¡± ¡°She was hit by car. She was only seventeen.¡± ¡°I¡¯m so sorry.¡± He squeezed me back. ¡°Just . . . just don¡¯t ever think that I don¡¯t have your back, Ara. I am always on your side.¡± I nodded against his chest and backed away. ¡°Okay, then you need to come with me right now.¡± ¡°Where?¡± ¡°To rescue Jason.¡± He winked down at me. ¡°Already on it.¡± ¡°What?¡± He nodded to the end of the corridor. ¡°Blade¡¯s got a release order drawn up for you. He¡¯s waiting in the Great Hall.¡± ¡°A release order?¡± We started walking. ¡°Why do we need that?¡± ¡°He¡¯s been imprisoned, Ara. Not just locked away.¡± ¡°On what grounds?¡± Falcon smirked. ¡°Exactly.¡± ¡°So, the king has no right to hold him?¡± ¡°Not unless he either fabricates a crime, or tells the truth about the affair.¡± I swallowed hard, looking to the path ahead. That was the first time I¡¯d heard our act of sin referred to as an affair. And it made me feel dirty, but also lucky David saw the need for a queen in our monarchy, or this evening could¡¯ve been spent in a very different environment. ¡°What about Mike? Where¡¯s he?¡± ¡°In bed, sleeping it off.¡± I relaxed a bit then. ¡°Did the guard hurt him?¡± Falcon shook his head. ¡°What about Jase . . . did they. . .?¡± ¡°Jason¡¯s been banged up pretty bad, Ara.¡± I stopped walking and covered my mouth. ¡°By . . . David?¡± ¡°Not sure. But he left about half an hour ago. No one¡¯s seen him since.¡± I started walking again. ¡°Will David come back?¡± ¡°Yes,¡± Arthur said suddenly, closing his door as he stepped out of his room. My footsteps halted just in front of him. ¡°Amara¡ª¡± ¡°Please don¡¯t, Arthur.¡± I put my hand up between us. ¡°I know I¡¯m a disappointment, and I know¡ª¡± ¡°That wasn¡¯t what I was going to say.¡± He leaned down a little, placing his hand on my back. ¡°I already knew about the affair.¡± ¡°How? When?¡± ¡°Shortly after you fell from the lighthouse.¡± ¡°You mean jumped.¡± ¡°Yes.¡± He looked up at Falcon for a second. ¡°My dear girl, for what happened that night with Jason, I do not blame you. And I do not blame him. You were in love. And, yes, you committed an act of sin. But for all the morals and conventions in the world, Amara, I cannot find it within my heart to place blame on either one of you.¡± ¡°And yet, we¡¯re both guilty.¡± ¡°Or, perhaps, it was meant to be.¡± ¡°Meant to be?¡± He lowered his gaze to the floor. ¡°Your heart always has been torn between the two boys. And¡ª¡± ¡°But it¡¯s not anymore, Arthur.¡± I tapped my chest. ¡°My love for David has changed so much. I don¡¯t want to love Jason.¡± ¡°But you do love him, don¡¯t you?¡± I took a small step back. ¡°I said I don¡¯t want to.¡± ¡°But you do anyway.¡± ¡°Not as much as I love his brother.¡± I swept past him and started down the stairs quickly. Blade was in the doorway to the Great Hall before I even reached the base, wearing a huge smile, holding up a stack of papers. ¡°Ready then?¡± ¡°Just take me to him.¡± ¡°Ara?¡± Morgaine said, coming up behind Blade. ¡°Morgaine,¡± I warned. ¡°I have nothing to say to you.¡± ¡°Look, I had to do what I had to do. You should never have slept with Jason if you wanted to protect him,¡± she said, grabbing my arm as I dashed past. And the sudden contact of her hand on my skin made the anger inside me, made the vision of her tossing that dagger to Blade, boil up in my body like compounded steam. I swung around to knock her hand away, deciding at the very last second to hook my right fist across her jaw instead. She hit the ground like a sack of apples, dead shock widening the eyes of our onlookers. Page 57 ¡°Okay,¡± Morg said, clambering to her feet. ¡°Maybe I deserved that.¡±Advertisement ¡°That, and a lot more.¡± I pointed in her face. ¡°Let me make this clear to you, Morgaine. I don¡¯t trust you. I don¡¯t know what it is that you¡¯re up to, but I don¡¯t trust you.¡± ¡°But . . . what have I ever done?¡± ¡°Nothing yet.¡± I stepped backward. ¡°But you¡¯re a traitor. I know you are, and I am damn well going to prove it.¡± ¡°What on earth makes you think I¡¯m a traitor?¡± she called after me. ¡°Call it instinct,¡± I said, storming off, leaving them all behind. It wasn''t until I reached the Throne Room that Blade, Falcon and Arthur caught up. Morgaine, however, was nowhere to be seen. The entourage charged forward, with the queen at the helm, our shadows menacing the walls, and as we reached the end of the cellblock, even the guard on duty felt the threat. He stood to attention, his hand on his belt. ¡°Your Majesty.¡± ¡°Unlock this door.¡± ¡°But, My Queen, I have orders from the¡ª¡± ¡°Under article three, section five,¡± Blade started, stepping in. And Arthur grabbed the keys off the guard¡¯s belt and unlatched the door, shoving it open. Our eyes darted across the dark space, moving from one corner to the other, but Jason wasn¡¯t there. ¡°Arthur?¡± ¡°He¡¯s in there,¡± he said, offering me the path. ¡°I can smell his blood.¡± I covered my mouth, noticing it then, too. ¡°What have they done to him?¡± He lowered his cheek to mine and aimed his finger to the centre of the room for me to follow. And there, at the end of my gaze, was a beaten, bloodied man¡ªhis arms chained, back flat to the wall, head hung loosely between his shoulders. His cuts had healed, wherever they had been, aside from the deep gashes cuffing his wrists where they¡¯d clearly been tugging at the chains for too long, but he wasn¡¯t conscious, and the blood of his agony still smothered his skin. I was by his side before my eyes even closed into their next blink, and had the chains torn off, his head in my lap before Arthur noticed I was gone. ¡°What have they done to him?¡± I screeched. ¡°Only what was asked, Your Majesty,¡± the guard said, looking up from the Release Order. ¡°Barbarians,¡± Arthur said, stepping into the cage. ¡°All of you.¡± The man ignored him. He was clearly a vampire and really didn¡¯t have all that much compassion. ¡°Is he gonna be okay?¡± I looked up to where Arthur squatted in front of us. He examined Jason and nodded, giving me a reassuring smile. ¡°He¡¯s already done most of the healing himself.¡± ¡°Thank God.¡± I sat back against the wall and tangled my fingers in Jase¡¯s hair, holding him close to my heart, as if maybe the beat would rouse him from sleep. The wall was still warm where his body had been against it for so long, and sticky with blood. I just didn¡¯t care how gross it felt under my shoulder, though. He didn¡¯t deserve this. I got yelled at¡ªlost my marriage, but my fate was in no way equal to his. And I knew this was just the beginning. David wouldn¡¯t let Jason live now, and he certainly wouldn¡¯t let him stay at the manor and support our cause any longer. This embrace, this moment holding him while he was unconscious was, I knew, one of my last. ¡°Ara?¡± he mumbled, trying to lift his hand. ¡°Shh.¡± I leaned down and kissed his bloody hair. ¡°It¡¯s me. You¡¯re safe now.¡± ¡°Ara, are you okay?¡± He looked up suddenly with panicked eyes. ¡°Yes, I¡¯m fine, Jase.¡± ¡°Did he hurt you? I¡¯ve been so worri¡ª¡± He coughed, cupping his ribs after¡ªthe sound ending in a short whimper. ¡°Your ribs. What happened?¡± ¡°I think my lung might be punctured.¡± ¡°Here.¡± I slid my wrist past my teeth, ignoring the sting as the skin tore open, and pressed it Jason¡¯s mouth. He looked at it for a second, then at my eyes. I smiled down at him. ¡°Just drink. If David wants to kill me for sharing blood with you, so be it. He shouldn¡¯t have had you beaten.¡± ¡°He didn¡¯t,¡± Jase said, and started drinking. I stroked his hair back lovingly, revelling in the warm rush of blood leaving my veins. ¡°Who did then?¡± ¡°It doesn¡¯t matter.¡± He sat up a bit, shifting rigidly to the wall beside me, not even bothering to wipe my blood clean from his mouth. ¡°I deserved it, Ara.¡± ¡°Why? Because you and I slept together?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± He laughed. ¡°Jase . . . you did it to save David.¡± He wrapped his arm around me and held me close. ¡°And that still doesn¡¯t make it okay.¡± ¡°No, it doesn¡¯t. It was stupid and impulsive, but. . .¡± ¡°But?¡± I wanted to slide my fingers into his hand and hold it. I wanted to tell him I wasn¡¯t sorry, wanted to say that I loved him, that I jumped off that lighthouse because I couldn¡¯t live in a world where my heart was torn. I wanted to tell him that I could be his now that David didn¡¯t want me. But I wouldn¡¯t have meant any of it. Truth was, I did love Jason¡ªloved him more back then than I did now. And all I wanted in the world was to go back to that night and stop myself from doing what we did, even if it meant David would have to die. Because I could live with that a lot easier than I could live with his pain. I rested my head on Jase¡¯s shoulder and just sat with him, the guard, Arthur, and Blade all watching on, until the air cleared and Jason started breathing properly again. ¡°Knock-knock,¡± I said, tapping on Mike¡¯s bedroom door. He looked up from the cardboard box on his bed, laying a shirt in it as he turned around. ¡°Ara.¡± ¡°Are. . .¡± I walked in with my arms folded, eyeing the ten or so staff that were packing things down and closing up boxes, the evening sun setting quickly in the sky behind them. ¡°Are you leaving me, Mike?¡± ¡°No.¡± He turned away again and added the rest of the shirt pile to his box. ¡°I¡¯m being evicted¡ªmoving down the barracks.¡± ¡°What? Why?¡± ¡°These rooms are for the highest ranking members in the monarchy, Ara. David ranks higher than me.¡± ¡°He¡¯s moving in here?¡± I stepped forward in one sweeping move, my jaw leading the way. ¡°Guess so.¡± Mike rubbed his neck. ¡°Oh, by the way, we¡¯ve called an emergency council meeting¡ªjust the private council, to discuss our next move. We¡¯re meeting in the Round Room in twenty.¡± ¡°Oh, okay.¡± I looked at the clock on Mike¡¯s wall. ¡°But it¡¯s almost dinner time.¡± ¡°Things need discussing.¡± ¡°What things?¡± ¡°What do you think, Ara? How ¡®bout that little confession you made this morning?¡± ¡°Didn¡¯t realize there was anything to discuss.¡± ¡°Of course there is.¡± He sighed, shaking his head. ¡°Look, just let me get this finished, would ya?¡± ¡°Okay, But. . .¡± I stood back and let him pass with his box. ¡°Well, how¡¯s your neck?¡± ¡°It¡¯s fine.¡± He dusted his hands off and slid his thumbs into his pockets, dropping his head while he let out a huge sigh. ¡°Why¡¯d you do it? Why¡¯d you sleep with Jason?¡± I closed my mouth and drew a really long breath through my nose. ¡°Honestly, Mike, because I loved him.¡± ¡°Loved. As in . . . past tense?¡± ¡°Sort of.¡± I bit my lip for a second. ¡°So, what, your feelings changed?¡± ¡°Not so much changed for how I feel about Jason, but . . . for how I love David.¡± ¡°So, what? You didn¡¯t love David before you slept with Jason?¡± I smiled. ¡°Yeah, I did. I just . . . see, when David and first I met, I came to realise one day, well, to believe, that I couldn¡¯t live without him. Then he told me he had to leave and I could never see him again.¡± ¡°Because he was a vampire and didn¡¯t want you to hate him?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I stepped back so a maid could carry a box out the door. ¡°I was so crushed. As you can imagine.¡± Mike nodded. ¡°Then, he told me I could be with him forever, but I had to be a killer, you know, leave all my family and friends behind. Which, you know how I felt about that, right?¡± Mike scoffed, turning away to fold another box as I spoke. ¡°But, after I nearly died¡ªyou know, with the whole masquerade thing, I decided I wanted to go with him¡ªbe a vampire.¡± ¡°But you didn¡¯t have the gene.¡± He nodded to himself. ¡°Yeah. So, he left me for my own good. And it hurt.¡± My voice broke. ¡°And then he came back, but even then we still weren¡¯t free to love each other because, at any minute, the Set could¡¯ve come for him and taken him away. We¡¯d had nothing but stress and worry, and it wasn¡¯t until he came back from ¡®the dead¡¯ and lived here at the manor that we ever had a chance to just be together, as every couple should.¡± I smiled, thinking about the better times. ¡°Things changed for me, Mike. There were some humps in the road as we figured out how to love each other, but we did figure it out. And I was happy. I didn¡¯t, for the first time since I met him, want anyone else in the world.¡± ¡°But this realisation happened after you¡¯d already slept with Jason?¡± I nodded. ¡°Well, it doesn¡¯t really matter what you feel for him now, baby, does it?¡± he said absently, sealing another box with clear tape. ¡°You destroyed that door when you slept with Jason. He won¡¯t ever take you back.¡± ¡°I do know that. But, it. . .¡± ¡°Hurts to admit?¡± I nodded. ¡°Do you hate me?¡± He breathed out, looking down at both of his big hands, then back up with a sympathetic half-smile. ¡°What happened on the lighthouse, Ara?¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± I stared out the window, reliving a flashback, blinking against the light when my mind returned to this day. ¡°Did you fall?¡± he asked accusingly. ¡°Or did you. . .¡± ¡°I jumped.¡± He nodded, wetting his lips. ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because I was mad at myself. I . . . I didn¡¯t think I deserved to live after what I¡¯d done. And I didn¡¯t like the truth I realised when I was with Jase.¡± ¡°What truth?¡± ¡°That I was in love with him.¡± He nodded again. ¡°So you tried to kill yourself to escape it all? To just, what¡ª¡± ¡°Mike, please.¡± I took an absent step back from him, just needing some air. ¡°Everyone hates me now, okay. Everyone is mad enough as it is. Please don¡¯t be one of them.¡± Page 58 ¡°What do you expect me to say?¡± He walked calmly over to stand in front of me. ¡°I love ya, baby, but you messed up something cruel, and then you went and tried to take the coward¡¯s way out.¡±Advertisement I blinked rapidly, sending the tears back where they belonged, trying so hard to breathe in a gentle rhythm, but the pain of regret made my chest cave. I folded over, holding my breath. ¡°Look, don¡¯t get me wrong, Ar.¡± He placed one hand to my back and the other around my arm, and gently made me stand straight again. ¡°I feel for you. I do. And I hate to see you like this, but¡ª¡± ¡°I did this to myself. I know.¡± He patted my shoulder. ¡°This too shall pass.¡± I nodded up at him, forcing an odd kind of smile. The corner of his lip pressed into his cheek and he patted my shoulder again, leaving me to find my own way out. ¡°He can¡¯t move out,¡± Blade said, and I stopped walking, pinning my back to the wall in the shadows of the rounded stairwell. ¡°We have to keep up appearances or the Upper House will start asking questions.¡± ¡°Maybe they should,¡± Morgaine said. ¡°Maybe the people should know what their queen did.¡± ¡°Are you insane?¡± Mike jumped in. ¡°They¡¯ll butcher her, Morg. You know what the punishment for infidelity is.¡± ¡°Yes, but¡ª¡± ¡°I don¡¯t,¡± Emily said. ¡°Mike, what is it¡ªwhat will they do to her?¡± ¡°She could be whipped, at the very least,¡± Falcon informed. ¡°But the old favourite for Ancient Lilithian times, still in practice today,¡± Quaid said, ¡°is La Br?lure de la Chastet¨¦.¡± ¡°What¡¯s that mean?¡± Em said. ¡°The Burn of Chastity. It¡¯s where the victim¡ª¡± ¡°Accused,¡± Morg corrected spitefully. ¡°The accused,¡± Falcon said, pausing after. I heard him swallow hard, even from all the way back here. He cleared his throat and started again. ¡°The accused is held down on a bed, with her legs strapped into stirrups.¡± ¡°Yeah, then they heat this small iron club,¡± Blade said, his jagged tone suggesting hand demonstrations to go with the explanation. ¡°And they insert it into the vagina to melt it shut.¡± ¡°The accused would often die of infection,¡± Falcon added. Emily gasped. ¡°David wouldn¡¯t let them. There¡¯s no way he¡¯d¡ª¡± ¡°He wouldn¡¯t have a choice,¡± Quaid said. ¡°Even the king and queen are bound by certain rules. If the House find out, Em, they decide her fate, not David.¡± ¡°But, surely he has some say?¡± ¡°Some, yes,¡± Falcon said. ¡°But the fact remains. This needs to be swept under the rug like every other act of infidelity in the political history of mankind. There can be no leaked secrets or expos¨¦s.¡± He paused for a moment. ¡°We¡¯re not talking about a media frenzy, here. We¡¯re talking about brutal mutilation.¡± ¡°She¡¯d heal in six weeks,¡± Morgaine said. ¡°Morg?¡± Mike cut in. ¡°Whose side are you on?¡± ¡°To be honest, I¡¯m neutral. She did wrong, Mike. Maybe, just maybe, this time the punishment fits the crime.¡± I heard a chair scrape out. ¡°I¡¯ll be damned if I¡¯m gonna¡ª¡± ¡°Sit down,¡± Falcon said in a slightly louder voice. ¡°Both of you. This is counterproductive.¡± Everyone in the room sighed as if the day had just been too long and they were all wrought with too many problems. And they were. And I caused it. I slid down the wall and sat on the cold stone step, listening while they all decided my fate. ¡°She needs to own up to the truth, Falcon,¡± Morgaine said. ¡°She can¡¯t hide from this.¡± ¡°I get that, Morg,¡± he said. ¡°I understand that it will eventually come out. All things do, but¡ª¡± ¡°Then, as her council, we should advise her to stand tall before her people and admit her mistakes. They might be lenient,¡± she reasoned. ¡°And what if they¡¯re not?¡± Blade said. ¡°She needs to lay low until David calms down. Maybe he¡¯ll just forgive her and all this will be over.¡± A few people laughed. ¡°I know her better than anyone,¡± Emily said. ¡°Why don¡¯t we get her out of here for a few weeks? She can pretend to take leave, give David time to calm down, and¡ª¡± ¡°She needs to face this head-on,¡± Morg said. ¡°David won¡¯t calm down, Emily. That¡¯s beyond ludicrous. I¡¯ve known him for over a hundred years. And the fact that he hasn¡¯t beat her already is a sheer miracle, you¡ª¡± ¡°I know him, too,¡± Emily yelled. ¡°And he loves her, Morg. If he found out the House performed that sadistic ritual on her, he¡¯d rip every last one of them¡ª¡± ¡°See?¡± Morg laughed condescendingly. ¡°You don¡¯t know him at all, Emily. He hates Ara. If she wants to avoid such a ¡°sadistic¡± ritual, then she needs to¡ª¡± ¡°What she needs is to know she¡¯s still got friends,¡± Falcon said, slamming something down on the table. Everyone shut up. ¡°Because she¡¯s gotta be feeling like just about the loneliest person in the world right now, and she needs to believe that, at least in our eyes, her mistake does not define her.¡± ¡°But it does define her,¡± Morgaine continued in the same tone, as if Falcon had said nothing. ¡°She cheated on David. Cheated, Falcon. We can¡¯t excuse that because we love her.¡± No one said anything for a few seconds, until, in a very small voice, Mike piped up with, ¡°I can.¡± Blade laughed breathily. ¡°As can I.¡± ¡°And I,¡± said Ryder. ¡°Yeah, same here,¡± Quaid said. ¡°I got her back. She¡¯s young, impulsive and makes some downright dumb mistakes. But she¡¯s a good girl, Morg.¡± ¡°And that¡¯s just it,¡± Falcon added. ¡°She is just a girl. Almost every person in this room, aside from Emily, is at least five years older than her. She¡¯s been through Hell and back again. She¡¯s had nothing but tragedy since she turned seventeen, and she¡¯s not had a goddamn second to process any of it. She slept with Jason,¡± he added, exhaling loudly after. ¡°But I¡¯d bet my life she¡¯d take it back if she could.¡± ¡°Well, that¡¯s the shitty thing about mistakes, isn¡¯t it, Falcon?¡± Morg said flatly. ¡°There¡¯s no going back.¡± ¡°So we just let them brutalise her?¡± Blade said, his voice breaking. No one had anything to say. Morgaine was right, though; I did this. Not them. I did deserve to be punished. There was no argument to be had. And my council should not have been bearing the weight of my mistake. I stood up, dusted my butt off and composed myself into a picture of sovereignty, then walked slowly into the room. They all looked up, their faces changing when they realised I would¡¯ve heard them. ¡°David wants to move out of our room,¡± I said calmly. ¡°I understand that, and I¡¯m okay with it.¡± ¡°But the House, they¡ª¡± ¡°They¡¯ll find out,¡± I said. ¡°Yes, and I will have to stand trial for my crimes.¡± ¡°Ara, they¡¯ll¡ª¡± ¡°I know what they¡¯ll do.¡± I walked stiffly over and sat down on my chair. ¡°I¡¯ll be okay, Em. I¡¯m strong, and I¡¯ve suffered worse.¡± I smiled over at Mike. ¡°But I can¡¯t hide from this. It will come out eventually, and¡ª¡± ¡°But it doesn¡¯t have to be now.¡± Emily placed her hand over mine. I looked down to where she now squatted on the floor beside me, her caramel eyes reaching to the deepest part of my heart where I knew she hoped to find common sense. But this couldn¡¯t be reasoned with. ¡°Always do the right thing,¡± I said. ¡°And let the pieces fall where they may.¡± ¡°Pieces?¡± she cried. ¡°Ara, you heard what they said, what they¡¯ll do to you.¡± ¡°And I deserve it, Emily.¡± ¡°No.¡± She stood up. ¡°You made a mistake. You don¡¯t deserve to be brutalised like that.¡± I looked around the room at each of the faces. ¡°David knows what they¡¯ll do to me if they find out. And he knows that his moving to another room will raise questions. This is inevitable, guys.¡± I shrugged, holding my hands out. ¡°You can only run from your problems for so long. They always catch up with you.¡± ¡°And they will certainly follow you wherever you go,¡± David said, and we all turned around to look at him; he leaned on the wall in the doorway, one hand in his pocket, his dark gaze cooling the room. ¡°The House will know what you did. But not yet.¡± ¡°When?¡± Mike asked. ¡°What are you planning, David?¡± The king curled his fingertips inward, inspecting his nails. ¡°I¡¯m not an entirely cruel man,¡± he said. ¡°When I see even the most heinous beast suffer, I feel empathy. But¡ª¡± He took a stroll across the room. ¡°I refuse to feel empathy for that.¡± ¡°David? You¡ª¡± ¡°You will sit down, Emily Pierce, or you will suffer the queen¡¯s fate along with her.¡± Emily sat down. ¡°I will leave instructions with the Upper and Lower House after I¡¯m gone.¡± ¡°Gone?¡± Morgaine said. ¡°Yes.¡± David stopped walking and placed both hands on the back of Morg¡¯s chair. ¡°Once Drake is dead¡ª¡± ¡°You¡¯re still going to kill him?¡± I gasped. David¡¯s eyes flicked my way once in annoyance, then he continued without answering me. ¡°Then I will have the guards arrest her and she will bear the full weight of the law. Once she¡¯s endured her punishment, if she does so with grace, she will be reinstated and continue to rule the Three Worlds.¡± ¡°David, you can¡¯t¡ª¡± ¡°I can do what I see fit, Emily,¡± he said through his teeth. ¡°She will suffer the consequences of her actions, and there will be no argument. This meeting is over.¡± Everyone stayed put, their mouths hung like frogs waiting for flies. ¡°And what about Jason?¡± I asked, turning in my seat to face David. ¡°What are you going to do with him?¡± ¡°I said,¡± David repeated in a clipped tone. ¡°This meeting. Is. Over.¡± Forks scraped piercing sounds down china plates, while the gentle clatter of wineglasses and murmured dinner conversations gave the candlelit evening a sort of comfortable, almost homely feel, almost as if I could imagine nothing bad had happened yesterday, or as if weeks had passed instead of only hours since I told David about Jason and I. At breakfast this morning, Margret and Walt openly discussed David¡¯s move to a new room and how David had laughed it off, said it was nothing but a minor argument between he and I that would resolve itself in a few weeks. And now we sat at dinner, such little time having passed but with so much on my mind, that it felt like I¡¯d never left the table after breakfast. Page 59 David chose to avoid me today, even going as far as to miss Court, with a very valid excuse, of course. I¡¯d been looking forward to that moment when I might sit beside him on the throne, though, perhaps gauge his reaction to me, maybe see if there was any hope at all for forgiveness, even one day, years from now. But the way he looked at me as we sat down to dinner killed all that hope. I swallowed each bite of my meal with the massive lump that had formed in my throat, not sure anything of substance was actually hitting my stomach. I felt wildly sick and hungry¡ªabout as hungry as a pauper roaming winter streets, and every time I tried to join conversations, either David just flat-out ignored me, or Morgaine cut me off whenever I opened my mouth. She¡¯d taken a side long before this Jason business began, and it clearly wasn¡¯t mine. In fact, I wouldn¡¯t be surprised at all if I woke to find her leaning over me in the dark with a dagger in her hand.Advertisement David looked up from the other end of the table then, and raised his glass, bowing his head as if to say, ¡°I welcome the idea.¡± Stay out of my head, I thought. I¡¯m not there by choice, he thought back. I¡¯d rather lick Walt¡¯s moustache than be forced to listen to anything you have to think. I slinked lower in my seat, looking to Jason for a single moment of reassurance. But his seat was empty, its occupant now assigned to stable duties until David decided what to do with him. Even Arthur was too distracted to offer a quick smile. In fact, the whole room was full of life and laughter, vampires and Lilithians freely interacting and getting along, but the yellow of candlelight and the peaceful hum of conversation slowly turned into grey clouds and pouring rain above me, spitting my own misery out all over the table¡ªwetting the food and the tablecloth, and flattening the hair to the head of each guest. But none of them noticed. David performed as his usual kingly self, talking with members of the Upper House, his charming smile and glittering green eyes holding a captive audience as if everything he might say could be of great value. He was glowing, even though the night around us was otherwise shadowed with doom. No one would¡¯ve known by looking at him that he just had his heart ripped out of his chest. And that only made me love him more: he was always so good at playing the game¡ªhiding things away on the inside for the greater good of the world outside. I could learn a thing or two from him. If he¡¯d ever speak to me again which, judging from the last twenty-four hours, I no longer existed as far as he was concerned. Which one would expect, anyway¡ªafter what I did. But it still hurt so amazingly bad that everything we had just blew away in the wind, like the flash from a camera. Just gone. Never was. Never will be again. None of that mattered to me, though, not the way he¡¯d acted today, or anything cruel he¡¯d said to me. I knew, deep in my heart, that love couldn¡¯t die overnight. He still loved me somewhere in that soul of his, and I wasn¡¯t about to give up on him. Not yet. Not while¡ª ¡°Morgaine?¡± David said, laying his wineglass on the table just above his plate. ¡°Yes, Sire?¡± ¡°Our queen looks rather ill, wouldn¡¯t you say?¡± Morgaine appraised me critically, then nodded in agreement. ¡°I think she does.¡± ¡°She looks fine,¡± Blade cut in. ¡°No, in fact, I rather think she looks as if she needs to lie down,¡± David said, and winked at Morg. ¡°See that she makes it safely to her room.¡± ¡°Of course, Sire.¡± Morgaine wiped her mouth and stood, huffing impatiently at me. ¡°Amara?¡± I looked at Mike, then at Falcon, who stood and pushed his chair in. ¡°Oh, you needn¡¯t follow, Falcon.¡± David said, raising a hand. ¡°Morgaine will attend to the queen.¡± ¡°The hell she will,¡± Falcon snapped, bowing politely after. ¡°Your Majesty.¡± The fire of authority flamed in David¡¯s gaze. He practically scorched Falcon with it, clearly plotting a million punishments he could inflict on my overprotective guard for daring to go against him¡ªin public especially. My heart beat so fiercely in my chest I could taste the blood in my throat. I knew David wanted to challenge Falcon, but he calmed himself instead and took a more honourable approach. ¡°Very well.¡± He offered me to Falcon. ¡°See that she stays in her room for the remainder of the evening. Wouldn¡¯t want anyone else catching whatever she¡¯s carrying.¡± A few dinner guests nodded and chattered in polite agreement, not seeing David¡¯s dismissal for what it was. ¡°Come on.¡± Falcon appeared at my side, shoving Morg away as he hauled me gently to stand by my arm. ¡°No.¡± I slammed my hands on the table. ¡°I¡¯m not sick, David. And I¡¯m not going to bed.¡± ¡°That¡¯s where you¡¯re wrong, Ara. You are sick, disgustingly sick. And unless you care to tell our guests what your ailment is, perhaps you should take my advice.¡± He presented the room full of people, flashing me a grin so smug I wanted to hit him. I grabbed a potato off my plate instead and ditched it hard toward his head, realising what I¡¯d done only as it left my hand and flew past the stunned guests, making the flames on the candelabra¡¯s flicker momentarily before exploding on the back of David¡¯s chair, right beside his ear. ¡°How dare you!¡± He stood up, tossing his napkin down, but before he could storm over here and punish me, Mike, Blade, Quaid, and Ryder stood, too, ready to challenge him. I eyed my Guard nervously, looking from each one of their stern gazes locked to David, then back at the king. It was a standoff. None of them had the right to challenge him, but all of them were more than willing to. And I loved each of them so dearly in that moment. ¡°David,¡± Arthur said softly, wiping his mouth before slowly standing up. ¡°It seems our young queen is overtired. I¡¯ll take her up to bed.¡± ¡°Best you do, Uncle,¡± David said coldly, dusting potato mash off his shoulder. ¡°Before I do.¡± ¡°Ara.¡± Falcon took my arm, leaning in close to whisper, ¡°You better just go.¡± I nodded, stepping away from my chair, walking backward a few steps until the guests slowly began their gentle, polite chatter again, acting as if nothing happened, while David stood at the head of the table, his eyes black with fury. ¡°I won¡¯t say he didn¡¯t deserve it,¡± Arthur said, catching up on the other side of the doors. ¡°But you should have more self-control.¡± ¡°I¡¯m a human-being, Arthur, in part. And I have rights. He can¡¯t order me to bed like some child just because he doesn¡¯t want to listen to my thoughts.¡± I pointed back toward the Great Hall. ¡°Imagine if I tried to do something like that to him.¡± ¡°You¡¯re absolutely right,¡± he said with a nod. ¡°He was being petty, but you mustn¡¯t stoop to his level.¡± ¡°Easier said than done,¡± I scoffed. ¡°Besides, I think she went a little below his level, Arthur,¡± Falcon said, holding back the obvious humour in his tone. ¡°But she gets points for the look on David¡¯s face when that potato hit the chair.¡± Even Arthur laughed then. ¡°It¡¯s safe to say no girl has ever been brave enough to do that before.¡± ¡°I feel bad now, though,¡± I said, hugging myself. ¡°Don¡¯t.¡± Falcon guided me along with a hand to my shoulder blade. ¡°He really did have that coming, Ara.¡± ¡°If it were me,¡± Arthur said, ¡°I¡¯d have thrown the steak.¡± ¡°Yeah, it was a bit tough tonight, wasn¡¯t it?¡± Falcon agreed, both of them laughing again. But I couldn¡¯t laugh. I didn¡¯t even want to. Chapter Twelve The majesty of life made the ancient trees feel taller, the wind cooler, and the nakedness of my body pure and unsullied. I was never any freer or any more beautiful than when I left the confines of human convention behind and wandered under the great evergreens of the Enchanted Forest. Nothing changed about my physical appearance when I came here: my feet still connected with the earth, my toes sticking to the dewy leaves carpeting the floor, but somehow I just never felt quite as solid. The night still owned this part of the forest, daylight only showing in small flickers here and there in the distance, or through waving leaves in the canopy above. The sun was well and truly up now, but my heart, I think, kept the forest shadowed, hiding things inside me that I wasn¡¯t ready to awaken. Fears. Worries. Heartache. I walked on, taking the long way to the stone altar, in no hurry today to get back to my life, but it came into sight up ahead before I expected: a simple grey boulder, seemingly unremarkable, yet as I reached the clearing, the warmth emanating off its surface, rising from the very core, reached out to greet me, healing broken parts of my soul in a way no other living thing could. Ideas and thoughts that had previously only been suspicions felt like shiny marbles behind glass partitions¡ªfinally visible. None of it looked as confusing. And while I hadn¡¯t drawn any conclusions about the questions I asked when I came to visit the Mother, I did get the sense that they were leading me down the right track to the answer. Sometimes, Jase had told me once, reaching a conclusion is not so much about seeking the answer, but knowing which questions to ask. ¡°He always was a smart boy, that Jason.¡± I looked down from the treetops to a pair of shiny black eyes, set on the sides of a very scaly face. ¡°You.¡± ¡°No. Jason.¡± ¡°No, I mean, it¡¯s you: you¡¯re the one who was¡ª¡± ¡°Guiding you on your Walk of Faith.¡± ¡°Who¡ª¡± I stepped closer. ¡°Who are you?¡± It looked off to one side like it was exasperated, shifting its long body then from where rested on the Stone to an almost standing, kind of human position, changing, reshaping until wings popped out on its back and its body shrunk before my eyes, resembling a butterfly. ¡°I am the mother of earth¡ªof all life, young goddess. You¡¯ve spoken with me many times.¡± ¡°But I¡¯ve never seen your face.¡± ¡°And you are still yet to be allowed that privilege, Auress,¡± she said, changing again, her form wavering like heat on pavement at a distance, and when my eyelids shifted up from a blink, a tiny blue bird sat before me. ¡°I have many faces. Some you have seen before, some you will see again.¡± ¡°Why have you come here today?¡± I asked. ¡°Child, you understand so little of the world you rule.¡± She looked around. ¡°I have not come here today. I am in all things. I am life, breath, I am the trees and the grass. I am you.¡± ¡°Well, yeah, but what I meant is¡­¡± I walked a little closer. ¡°Why have you chosen a physical form for me to address?¡± ¡°I am here to give an answer.¡± ¡°To what?¡± ¡°The question you just asked.¡± ¡°I asked a question?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± She leaped off the Stone with a graceful flap of her wing and appeared behind me as a butterfly again. ¡°Follow me.¡± Page 60 ¡°Where are we going?¡±Advertisement ¡°To seek the answer.¡± ¡°What was the question?¡± ¡°When you see the answer, you may remember the question.¡± I followed her, walking slowly through this sacred land, both of us greeting the birds and the bugs as we passed. When we came to the border where I left my clothes, the butterfly perched itself on a tree branch. ¡°Why are we here, Mother?¡± ¡°Look beyond the answer to find the question, Auress. You ask yourself this many times a day, and every visit to this forest has had the one question in mind, beneath all others.¡± ¡°How will I know if I¡¯m asking the right question to the answer you give? And what is the answer?¡± ¡°Look up, Auress. The answer is staring at you.¡± ¡°Why do you do that?¡± Jase asked, leaning on a tree nearby with his arms folded. ¡°Oh, shit.¡± I covered my breasts with my hands, squatting down on the spot to hide the other bits I didn¡¯t want him to see. Jase laughed and appeared behind me, wrapping his over-shirt around my back. ¡°Seriously? Why do you walk naked?¡± ¡°It¡¯s. . .¡± I stood up, closing the shirt across my front. ¡°Clothes are a distraction, sort of. When I¡¯m naked, the, I guess, ¡°voice of Nature¡± comes through so clearly. It¡¯s almost like I can hear the whispers of the universe.¡± ¡°Kind of like why the Walk of Faith was always done naked?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I nodded, folding over a bit so the shirt covered any hair I wouldn¡¯t normally show. ¡°It¡¯s out of respect, really, as if to hide your true form is to be ashamed of it.¡± He bit his lips together, trying not to laugh. ¡°And now you¡¯ve lost your clothes?¡± ¡°Shut up, Jase.¡± I slapped his chest. ¡°Relax.¡± He laughed, jumping back a few steps. ¡°I¡¯ve already seen you naked.¡± We stood there then, just looking at each other, and the longer we looked, the less naked I felt. I stood a little bit taller, letting my arms fall loosely to my sides. Jase took a jagged breath as the shirt parted slightly and showed my milky white skin in places he didn¡¯t usually see¡ªjust a thin line down the centre of my body, revealing the bone between my breasts, my belly button, and the apex of my thighs. And he wasn¡¯t strong and noble and wise to me then; he looked scared and young, and so adorably timid I almost laughed. ¡°It doesn¡¯t mean the same thing to me as it does to you,¡± I said. ¡°What?¡± ¡°Nakedness,¡± I said. ¡°It¡¯s not sexual for me. Not out here.¡± He looked around the forest, nodding. ¡°Can¡¯t say I feel the same way.¡± I smiled. ¡°I¡¯m sorry. No one was supposed to be around.¡± He kept the nod going, clearly suffering under his external cool. ¡°You¡¯re right. I am suffering.¡± He took a few steps away and started digging under leaves and branches. ¡°Let¡¯s just find your clothes.¡± ¡°Jase?¡± He looked up, a little shocked that I was suddenly behind him, and closed the shirt as he stood up right in front of me. ¡°Don¡¯t be nervous around me.¡± ¡°Ara, I am in love you. It might not mean anything to you to be naked right in front of my eyes,¡± he said with a small laugh. ¡°But it just makes me wanna hold you, and I can¡¯t. I know that. I know it¡¯s not right. I¡ª¡± ¡°You don¡¯t have to explain, Jase.¡± I lay my hand over his where it tightly capped the shirt closed. ¡°I know how you feel about me. I¡¯m sorry. I don¡¯t want to make you uncomfortable.¡± He nodded, turning away. ¡°Like I said, let¡¯s just find your clothes, because I¡¯m not really sure how much longer I can control myself, Ara.¡± I wet my lips, shaking my head. ¡°You don¡¯t need control. You have honour.¡± ¡°Honour means nothing when I just wanna slide my hand inside that shirt, all the way along your soft, naked hips, and pull you in close¡ªhold you until all that pain I know you¡¯re feeling goes away or, at least, doesn¡¯t hurt so bad.¡± My skin practically left my body then and jumped into his arms. I wanted that so badly, too. But more than I wanted Jase, for once, I just wanted him to be David. ¡°I see.¡± He nodded, his whole face shadowed with a frown. ¡°I. . .¡± ¡°Jase. I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°It¡¯s never changed, Ara.¡± He held both hands up when I went reached for him. ¡°And I¡¯m okay. I¡¯m not mad at you, or anything. I just . . . it¡¯s never gonna change, is it? Not even now you¡¯re free to be mine?¡± I slowly moved my head from side to side. ¡°Yeah,¡± he whispered so low I almost didn¡¯t hear. ¡°Guess I should¡¯ve accepted that a long time ago.¡± ¡°Jase, wait,¡± I called, but he turned and walked away at human pace, without looking back. The kitchen was quiet. All the staff were having lunch below the manor, my knights were all at training, and all my friends were off doing something of value. I sat at the table in the centre of the room, tapping my fingernails against the ceramic mug to make some noise and maybe blend out the loneliness I felt today, but it didn¡¯t work. Mike¡¯s brownies, however, did. Well, maybe not with the loneliness¡ªI took another bite and closed my eyes to savour the flavour¡ªbut they at least gave me a second of joy. Eating something Mike made, I guess, was like going home to visit your parents after growing up and moving out. ¡°So you¡¯re going to eat your problems,¡± David said, leaning in the doorway. I threw the brownie down and wiped my mouth. ¡°I didn¡¯t know anyone was there.¡± ¡°Clearly.¡± He walked in. ¡°That¡¯s the fourth one you¡¯ve eaten.¡± I looked at the plate. Sure enough, I¡¯d gobbled up pretty much the whole batch. ¡°Guess I was hungry.¡± ¡°No, you weren¡¯t.¡± He moved over and stood beside me, closer than he¡¯d been to me in days. ¡°You¡¯re eating your problems, and it¡¯s showing.¡± ¡°Showing?¡± I looked down, following his smug stare. ¡°Do think I¡¯m the only one that¡¯s noticed how fat you¡¯ve gotten?¡± My blood ran cold. I sucked my gut in. ¡°It¡¯s just a little. . .¡± ¡°Disgusting.¡± ¡°I was gonna say pot.¡± I patted my belly. ¡°And, can you blame me?¡± His brows moved up his forehead and he scratched just beside his nose. ¡°No, I suppose not. You never really did have any self-control.¡± ¡°I have plenty.¡± I stood up. ¡°So what if I¡¯m putting on a little weight? It¡¯s not like I¡¯m fat.¡± The smugness swathed his face then. He folded his arms and looked me up and down. ¡°You¡¯re the fattest I¡¯ve ever seen you, and I gotta say, Ara, it really doesn¡¯t suit you.¡± ¡°That¡¯s it,¡± I said through my teeth, the rage moving through my chest, taking control of my arm. He caught me before my hand impacted his face, though, and held my wrist tight, his eyes locked to mine like stony caverns. ¡°You ever try something like again,¡± he said, gliding into me. ¡°And I will do more than just catch your hand. Do you understand me?¡± ¡°You don¡¯t frighten me,¡± I said, but my voice quivered. I came to rest with my spine against the wall, my gaze gridlocked with his¡ªhiding nothing of the fear he created in me. Once, I knew him well, knew he¡¯d never hurt me. But now, I wasn¡¯t really so sure. He looked down at my hand, his eyes fixing on the lone gold band around my ring finger. ¡°Why are you still wearing that?¡± I jerked downward, trying to pull out of his grasp, but he held my hand in an iron grip and capped his fingertips around the ring, forcing it from my finger. ¡°David, don¡¯t.¡± ¡°You have no right to wear this.¡± He held it up, taking a few long strides away from me. ¡°You lost that right the day you bedded my brother.¡± ¡°We¡¯re still married,¡± I said, squaring my shoulders. ¡°And Lilithians don¡¯t believe in divorce. So, like it or not, you¡¯re stuck with me.¡± ¡°Let me get one thing monumentally straight¡ª¡± He stepped closer, his shoulders rounding to lower his face to mine. ¡°I am stuck with nothing. Our bond may be by that of the law, Ara, but you are in no way my wife. You mean nothing to me nor do the promises this ring symbolises.¡± He held it up in a circle between his fingers. ¡°We may not be allowed to divorce, but make no mistake, we are not, nor shall we ever be again, husband and wife. And if I see this on your finger again, I will cut it off with the blade in my scabbard.¡± He placed a hand to his knife for good measure. ¡°Do I make myself clear?¡± I nodded, squeaking instead of speaking. ¡°Right.¡± He rolled to stand tall again, ditching the gold band at my feet. ¡°Now pull yourself together. We have Court in ten minutes, and unless you want to be mutilated before my eyes, on this very day, we¡¯d better convey a united front.¡± ¡°Didn¡¯t know you cared.¡± He stopped walking, but didn¡¯t turn around. ¡°I don¡¯t.¡± ¡°Since when?¡± I said. ¡°Can you really just fall out of love with me that quickly?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°What about the boy I met at school?¡± I went to walk forward, deciding to stay put instead. ¡°What would he think to know you felt this way? Go back, David. Remember us. Remember what we felt then. Do you really hate me so much you can¡¯t ever forgive me¡ªforgive that girl you fell in love with?¡± Both of us stood silently then. I could see his memories flashing and fighting against reality and perception¡ªsee him picture me in my yellow dress on the driveway of my dad¡¯s house that first day I arrived. He¡¯d never seen anything so uniquely and perfectly matched to him and all his desires in his hundred years on this earth. He loved me then, and I felt the love surround that thought, but he cast it away quickly, smothering it with images he¡¯d clearly stolen from Jason of the night he and I slept together, making me draw a breath. ¡°Yes, Ara,¡± he said to the floor, still not turning around. ¡°Yes to what?¡± ¡°Yes, love can die in an instant,¡± he muttered coldly, walking away. I stood motionless, horrified over what he¡¯d seen in Jason¡¯s thoughts. It wasn¡¯t much, just a few stilled images, clearly stolen when Jason wasn¡¯t in control. But it was enough to haunt David. And to haunt me. I toed the ring then, seeing the distance from here to floor as much greater than it actually was. And for that moment, I didn¡¯t even feel as if I had the right to pick the damn thing up. He took it from me¡ªthrew it to the ground like it was nothing. Because it was nothing, I guess. He was right. All the promises we made gave that ring life, and without them, it was just a plain gold band. It meant nothing. Page 61 I turned and walked away, too, leaving it behind on the floor.Advertisement Despite personal grievances, neither David nor I let them get in the way of our duty to the people. We politely took the back seat when the other was standing before the Court, deciding the fate of lawbreakers, and it seemed we¡¯d worked out an unspoken system for who ruled on what. David left the humanitarian cases up to me, and anything involving or requiring harsher punishments were left for him. But when those doors closed at the back of the Throne Room and Court had ended for the day, cold, dark David returned, speaking no words to me. I¡¯d turned and offered him a smile¡ªa kind of truce, but he did not accept. He just checked my finger to see that I¡¯d obeyed him and, once satisfied, hurried from the room. I didn¡¯t even bother to tell him I left the ring on the floor in the kitchen where he threw it. I didn¡¯t have the heart to touch it again, not when it now symbolised so many mistakes and so much heartache. Someone would find it and return it to me, and I could play dumb¡ªsay I¡¯d lost it when I was washing my hands. But at least, for now, I didn¡¯t have to tell anyone David forbid me to wear it. And the lie¡ªlosing it¡ªwas easier to carry than the truth. Then again, maybe I should have picked it up and kept it in my pocket. It¡¯d only been three days since my confession. I couldn¡¯t really expect miracles. The fact that we could rule with civility between us was divine intervention enough. I rolled onto my back, fluffing my pillows under my head, then just laid watching the sky outside change from black to dark blue¡ªthe stars slowly fading out group by group until dawn was on the horizon. I wasn¡¯t sure if I wanted to walk out and meet with Mother Nature this morning. Although it always recharged me, made me feel as though I¡¯d slept when I hadn¡¯t, or that I was well when I felt ill, I just didn¡¯t feel as if I could be bothered. I went there day after day, trying to find a way to stop David using the dagger on Drake, but the mother only seemed to want to talk about Jason. I thought maybe Jase was the answer, the key to saving David, but I just didn¡¯t know how. Then again, maybe she wasn¡¯t all that concerned about losing David. Maybe she was trying to tell me I should be with Jason. Who knew? I was never really good at riddles. ¡°Ara?¡± I sat bolt upright, searching the darkness for the voice when, across the sitting room, a creaky door slammed shut and someone whispered profanity at the sudden loud noise. ¡°Jase? Is that you?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± A lamp came on beside him. He stood there by the secret entrance beside the fireplace, his charmingly sheepish smile sending the jitters and ghosts of my instant reaction away. I flopped back for a second and breathed out. ¡°You scared the crap out of me.¡± ¡°Sorry.¡± ¡°What are you doing here?¡± ¡°It¡¯s almost dawn.¡± He nodded to the window. ¡°Figured you¡¯d be headed out for your usual walk soon.¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± I sat up and hugged my knees to my chest, resting my chin on them ¡°I wasn¡¯t planning on going today.¡± ¡°Why not?¡± he asked, strolling over, with both hands concealing something behind his back. ¡°I¡¯ve been thinking.¡± ¡°About?¡± ¡°David never really had a great life. I mean, neither of you did.¡± ¡°And?¡± He sat down beside me, making the bed dip a little, as if he were human and gravity had any bearing on him. ¡°He¡¯s a good king. He loves what he does, and he. . .¡± ¡°You still don¡¯t want him to die for you, do you?¡± I shrugged. ¡°Seems pointless. There¡¯s never gonna be a baby now, so¡­¡± ¡°That¡¯s not it, Ara,¡± Jason said. ¡°He¡¯s not doing this to protect the child. He¡¯s doing it because he¡¯s got nothing left to live for.¡± ¡°He has a monarchy. He has his uncle. I¡ª¡± ¡°You don¡¯t get it.¡± He smiled at me, making all his lovely white teeth visible. ¡°He hasn¡¯t got you.¡± I thought about that for a second. ¡°I understand that. But why does he care? He doesn¡¯t want me anymore.¡± ¡°It¡¯s . . . he¡¯s lost faith. He never believed in happiness until he found you, Ara. And now that¡¯s gone, he thinks he¡¯ll never find it again. He doesn¡¯t really see any reason to stick around.¡± ¡°Well, he doesn¡¯t get to make that decision.¡± ¡°Try to stop him,¡± Jase said, and we both smirked, shaking our heads. ¡°He¡¯s impossible, isn¡¯t he?¡± ¡°You didn¡¯t have to grow up with him.¡± I laughed out through my nose, then nodded at the package behind his back. ¡°So, what you got there?¡± ¡°Gift?¡± ¡°What kind of gift?¡± ¡°For you,¡± he said, presenting it with a nod of his head. I took it in my lap and considered it for a second: it was square, fat, velvet-red, all bound neatly with a silky black ribbon. ¡°What is it?¡± ¡°Open it, silly.¡± The knot slipped apart like water over glass, and fell away from the velvet with only one small pull. ¡°I thought you could wear it when you go walking in the forest, rather than trying to find your clothes again every time,¡± Jase explained. ¡°It¡¯s bright, easy to see, and I figure you can hang it off a branch or something.¡± I held up the cloth and my mouth opened in shock as it unravelled in heavy layers. ¡°It¡¯s . . . Jase, it¡¯s beautiful.¡± ¡°Wanna try it on?¡± ¡°I¡¯d love to.¡± He stood up and took the cloak, holding it out for me. I wriggled out from under my warm covers and pulled my nightdress down over my undies, turning my back so he could cloak me. And it wrapped my shoulders like a blanket, kind of heavy and warm, with that new fabric smell to it, as if it¡¯d just come from the tailor. ¡°It¡¯s perfect, Jase.¡± I turned around to face him. He tied the ribbon up just under my collarbones, drawing the hood over my head after. ¡°And it¡¯ll keep you warm, too, when it gets colder out.¡± I looked up at him from under the cloak, changing the smile in his eyes. ¡°Thank you, Jase.¡± ¡°You¡¯re welcome, Ara.¡± He leaned in and kissed my head, then pulled away as if gravity were forcing us together. ¡°I¡¯ll see ya later, okay?¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I watched him leave through the secret door, standing in the darkness of a dawning day as if I could slow it down or make it go away. This one would be like the next, and so on and so on, until, one day, David would take that dagger and kill Drake, and I would wake up to the rising sun, but I¡¯d never really see the light again. David didn¡¯t want to live now that he¡¯d lost hope. And I didn¡¯t want to live in a world without him. There was only one way to solve this issue now¡ªone way I could save David. If there was no contract, Drake wouldn¡¯t be a threat. And if there was no me, there could be no contract. I tossed the cloak aside and ripped my clothes off. The solution had been staring me in the face the whole time. He didn¡¯t need to die if there was nothing to die for. He could have the life he always wanted. It would be my gift to him for saving me from the darkness I sunk into all those years ago after I lost my mom¡ªthe same darkness I¡¯d never really escaped. I owed him this much. For all the pain I¡¯d caused him, and for all the love I would eternally feel for him, I at least owed him a future as king. Quaid stood as I opened my door. ¡°Morning, Ara.¡± ¡°Morning, Quaid.¡± ¡°Off for your dawn walk?¡± ¡°Yup.¡± I closed my door, fastening the cloak around my naked body. ¡°You can head off for a coffee break, if you like.¡± He stuffed his phone in his pocket and flashed me a toothy grin. ¡°I¡¯ll see ya in an hour.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I tried to smile. ¡°See ya then. Oh, and, Kumar?¡± He¡¯d taken leave quite eagerly, but when I addressed him like that, he stopped and very slowly turned around to face me. ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°Could you hold onto this for me?¡± I reached into the little side pocket and pulled out a small handwritten note. ¡°I was going to give it to Jason later, but I don¡¯t want to lose it in the forest.¡± He took the note and thumbed the edge, his eyes staying on it. ¡°What is it?¡± ¡°Just a letter,¡± I said casually and walked past him, holding my head high, even though I just wanted to break apart inside. Of all the people I was leaving behind, I knew it would hurt Jase the most. I didn¡¯t know who to write a farewell letter to, but I knew anything I wanted to say to anyone I cared about would be passed on by Jason. He was the only one I could truly trust. And I knew I could trust Quaid to give it to him. The red cloak brought me comfort as I glided like frost over the slated floors toward the Throne Room, passing beneath the cold arches of the manor, blending with the blue shadows of dawn. The words to my letter moved across my lips like a prayer, travelling with the hopes that each farewell would find its recipient. Especially David. There were few words I could offer him as goodbye, and not once did I use the word ¡®sorry.¡¯ He knew, deep down, that I was sorry and that what I did would slowly and surely have destroyed me more than it did him. I didn¡¯t need to tell him that. One day, centuries from now, when he found someone else to love, he would wake and realise all that I would have said anyway. Only then would it mean he was ready to listen. The great Throne Room doors opened gracefully, as if welcoming my footfalls to the road ahead. Here, I began my journey home again. Here, I would farewell my past and all the mistakes, and move forward. Finally free. I left the cloak at the base of the hill outside and entered the forest in my pure form, closing my eyes and feeling the energy of Nature guide me, gliding through the base of the trees like wind at my feet. It moved me forward quickly, sending word a breath ahead that I was on my way home¡ªthat I was coming to return to the place we all once began. ¡°Spirits of the forest,¡± I whispered, ¡°Show me how to return to that which created me.¡± The world went silent, the breeze dying away with the song of birds, and the leaves in the trees coming to a standstill, all waiting as if holding their breath, watching as the spirit of Mother Earth made herself known in this place. I closed my eyes and imagined her there by the Stone up ahead, with open arms welcoming me. And I knew what to do¡ªas if her voice itself whispered the answer in my ear. One foot over the other, I walked at a pace respectful to the flow and ease of all things living, existing, breathing this world of life in the rhythm of Nature. And as I came upon the Stone, fell to my knees and swiped a nail tip across the centre of my palm, drawing blood to the surface of my skin. She wanted it back¡ªMother who guarded the gateway between worlds. One must offer blood for anything asked of this Stone. I understood that now. Life, knowledge, magic: all of it could be mine for the exchange of this substance inside me that was connected more richly to the earth at our feet than this very platform in front of me. Page 62 I laid my hand to the Stone and felt it reach up, felt the life force inside it move to the blood on my palm and draw it away. ¡°Take me home,¡± I whispered my hot breath into the rock. ¡°Free me from the binds of this world so that I might save my people¡ªsave the king.¡±Advertisement I waited, imagining for a moment how Jase would react to my letter, imagining how relieved he¡¯d feel. I knew relief wasn¡¯t what I¡¯d be leaving behind, but after some time passed, I knew everyone would see that this was for the best. One day they would come to understand why I did this. I¡¯d failed at so many things, and for once in my life, I would die getting something right. ¡°Auress,¡± a ghostly voice said. I didn¡¯t need to look up. Didn¡¯t need to see where She stood. I could feel her beside me, feel her touch on my skin. I closed my eyes and smiled. ¡°Mother.¡± ¡°Young Auress, defender of all natural things, protector of this realm. Why do you seek to free yourself of your claim?¡± I placed my other hand to my bare chest. ¡°I broke him. I hurt him deeper than any soul should ever hurt, Mother. I can¡¯t save his heart, but I at least owe him his life.¡± ¡°A wise decision, young goddess. But not the only path that was laid at your feet.¡± I nodded. ¡°Yet, it¡¯s the one I¡¯m choosing.¡± ¡°And what of her?¡± ¡°Her?¡± I asked, trying hard not to open my eyes. ¡°Your child.¡± ¡°There is no child.¡± I felt her touch become warmer, almost as if I could feel her smile. ¡°Would you still want to die if I told you I foresee a child in your future?¡± I swallowed, my bleeding hand stinging now, going cold as the connection to the earth flickered, fading. ¡°David won¡¯t give me a child now, and even if he did, I can¡¯t stop Drake from taking her, not if he lives.¡± ¡°Ara!¡± A desperate voice hollered through the dawn shadows, stealing the tranquillity for a second. I turned my head and looked for the mother, but there was only warmth there where I imagined her. ¡°Hurry,¡± I pleaded. ¡°Take me now before they come.¡± ¡°Ara!¡± It called again, and beyond the fog I saw faces, sharpening and taking shape before my eyes: Mike, Quaid, Emily, Arthur, and Jason. ¡°Grab her, Mike!¡± Emily cried. ¡°Don¡¯t!¡± I ordered, my voice coming through my lips in a deep, almost baritone whisper. ¡°Only an Auress can enter here now. You¡¯ll die, Mike.¡± ¡°Ara, please,¡± he begged, taking a step closer. ¡°Don¡¯t touch me.¡± I aimed my finger toward him, the command of my voice stopping him in his tracks. He looked down at his feet, trying to move them, but they wouldn¡¯t shift. ¡°I¡¯ve made my choice,¡± I said, searching their eyes as my gaze travelled over each face. ¡°This is the only way.¡± ¡°Ara?¡± Jason stepped into sight, reaching out to me but not daring to come close. ¡°I read the letter. I know,¡± he said, his eyes holding the weight of everything I told him. ¡°I know, okay, and you don¡¯t have to do this.¡± ¡°I¡¯m the only one nobody will miss, Jase.¡± ¡°Oh, Ara.¡± He dropped quickly to a squat, covering his mouth. ¡°Please don¡¯t think that way. You matter to me, okay. More than anything in this world, sweet girl, and I¡¯ll die without you. You can¡¯t go.¡± I turned back, laying my other hand on the Stone. ¡°It¡¯s already done.¡± ¡°No!¡± he cried, and my heart skipped a beat when Arthur sternly said David¡¯s name, telling him to do what he had to do. I could feel David here with me then¡ªfeel him connected to the earth through me. But it didn¡¯t matter. None of them could touch me. None of them had the power. I was completely wrapped up in the hands of my maker, already wedged between this world and the next. I focused harder on my hands, feeling my wrists and arms go through and touch the world on the other side. And it felt like magic, like a warm, happy feeling right in the centre of my chest. Every problem I ever had just fell away then, like petals off a dying rose, making me laugh for that moment. We all took things so seriously there in that world, and as I looked upon the other realm, I realised as deep as my soul was living, that on this side, nothing mattered¡ªnot the past, not our mistakes, not our failings as humans, and not our regrets. Here, we were all just life without consciousness. ¡°Ara?¡± I looked down to the cool, familiar hands wrapping my ribs¡ªsmooth against my pale, naked skin, and both of us stared for a moment, open-mouthed as the black Mark of my betrayal faded under his touch, bubbling and reseeding back into my body. ¡°David, let me go. Please.¡± ¡°You can¡¯t go, Ara. I need to take you back.¡± I looked up from his hands at the blue light surrounding my body shining across his face. ¡°One of us has to die.¡± ¡°And it¡¯s not going to be you,¡± he said. ¡°You have a responsibility to your people.¡± ¡°They¡¯re your people now.¡± I turned back to the Stone, readying myself for the last breath. ¡°Right. Now, we do this my way,¡± David growled, and the skin peeled suddenly from hands, detaching at the elbows as he tore me away, my own cries of agony drowning out the horror in those around me. ¡°Let me go!¡± ¡°No.¡± He cradled my body to his, carrying me from the circle of light to the darkest patch of forest by the trees. I screamed for the searing in my arms and soul¡ªfeeling it snap back into my body like a sharp elastic band. I couldn¡¯t breathe, couldn''t get a grasp on this realm¡ªslipping between death and life intermittently. David dumped me on the ground and stood back. ¡°What have you done?¡± Arthur cried out, falling to his knees, his hands hovering over my body. ¡°She was too far gone.¡± David stood above me, a shadow in the now red light of the Stone¡¯s protest. ¡°I had to rip her from that world.¡± ¡°You¡¯ve left half the girl¡¯s goddamn flesh behind,¡± Arthur yelled. ¡°She¡¯ll survive,¡± David said calmly. I shuddered, feeling my soul connect completely with my body again, making the agony real¡ªfiery, like Hell had risen through the crack in the gateway David left open, and now ran fury among my limbs. ¡°Make it stop,¡± I cried, folding in on myself. ¡°Make it stop.¡± ¡°Move.¡± David pushed Arthur and Emily aside, and bent down to pick up a rock; my eyes followed his hand to the rise above his shoulder, closing as the stone came down bluntly across my head. Long, dark hair wavered along a breeze I couldn¡¯t feel, the pale pink dress, like torn threads of ancient fabric, weaving and waving with a life of its own from her delicate, feminine form. Her warmth spoke her name to a place inside me where faces were not identifiers of those we know, but rather the ¡®knowing¡¯ that showed us who we were by seeing those we were familiar with. ¡°Where are we?¡± I asked. ¡°In the world beyond thought,¡± the mother said, showing me all that surrounded us¡ªjust a foggy white world with no ground or sky to show up from down. ¡°Am I dead?¡± ¡°No. You will wake soon to a room of people who love you¡ªpeople who refused to let you walk with me.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± She tilted my chin upward. ¡°You must not be sorry, child, for anything. You are a great and wise queen, and you have done those before you proud.¡± I smiled softly. ¡°Really?¡± ¡°I know it comes as a shock to you to get something right, for once, but everything you have done up until now¡ªall the good and the bad¡ªhas been written in the stars, Amara. Your spirit had much to learn.¡± ¡°So it was all a lesson? Everything? The suffering, the¡ª¡± ¡°As it is for all God¡¯s creatures.¡± I shook my head for a second or two, remembering suddenly what she told me before I crossed over. ¡°You mentioned a child.¡± ¡°I did.¡± Her lips closed, her eyes shrinking into a pleasant smile. ¡°She will bring an end to everything that began centuries ago, and we have gone to great lengths to preserve that future for you, Auress¡ªcalled on the mightiest power of nature to ensure its survival.¡± ¡°Survival?¡± I frowned. ¡°What do you mean?¡± Her hand moved slowly across the space between us and landed on my belly. ¡°You will see soon enough.¡± ¡°When?¡± ¡°Once you open your eyes, your world will change, and you will walk a new path now, child¡ªone you are finally ready for.¡± ¡°How do you know I¡¯m ready?¡± ¡°You faced many truths in coming to the decision you made this morning. Each one of those showed us how much you have truly grown into the woman we hoped you¡¯d become. And, one of those truths, as fate would have it, has set you free from a bind you tied yourself in.¡± ¡°What bind?¡± She removed her hand from my belly. ¡°Your greatest gift in this realm is the heart, Auress. You betrayed yourself, your birth right, and your crown by denying it.¡± ¡°Denying it?¡± I thought for a second, then rolled my eyes, keeping them closed after. ¡°Jason.¡± ¡°It is a sin against God to lie to those you love, but an even greater sin to lie to yourself.¡± ¡°And what is the lie, Mother? What did¡ª¡± ¡°You want to love him.¡± She shook her head, a smile warming her whole face. ¡°You do love him, and you cannot deny this any longer.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t deny it. But I don¡¯t have to accept it.¡± ¡°No, you do not. You, like all God¡¯s creatures, were born with the gift free will. But, Jason¡¯s love is a gift also, and you can do with it what you wish, however, you must not hide the way you feel.¡± ¡°So, I need to admit it to him?¡± ¡°You already did, and you admitted it to yourself. Now¡ª¡± She presented my waist, ¡°you are free.¡± I looked down and slowly lifted my top, but she stopped me. ¡°You are blessed in that your soul is not bound to one eternal love. You can bind yourself to any soul you see fit. You will not spend your life seeking that significant other in order to find peace. But do not waste this blessing on lies. Live for those you truly love¡ªthe ones who truly deserve your love in return.¡± ¡°And what about David? Is he blessed with a free soul¡ªone that has no significant other?¡± She shook her head slowly. ¡°Am I. . .¡± I touched my chest. ¡°Am I his significant other, his soul mate?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± I turned and went to cry into my hand, stopping with the warm touch of the mother on my shoulder. ¡°You must not cry for him. For, if you do, you must shed the same tears for the other who is tied to you.¡± Page 63 ¡°Who?¡±Advertisement ¡°The brother.¡± ¡°Wait . . . I¡¯m his soul mate too?¡± She nodded. ¡°How?¡± ¡°Those boys are one soul, divided in two. What one loves, the other will die for, too.¡± ¡°And that¡¯s . . . me?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± I dropped my hand back down to my side. ¡°Oh God. Those poor boys.¡± Even the mother of all life had to laugh at that. ¡°My dear little goddess. This will not be an easy decision for you, but you must know that, when the time comes to choose, you will lose the one you push away.¡± ¡°Then I¡¯ll be losing Jason,¡± I said. ¡°Because, even if the day comes where I decide I love him more than David¡ª¡± I shook my head, ¡°¡ªI can¡¯t be with him, Mother. I could never hurt David like that.¡± She touched my shoulder. ¡°Then be prepared to suffer for a very long time.¡± ¡°We should¡¯ve let her go,¡± Emily sobbed. I looked up¡ªlooked past the shimmering pink light of life before me. ¡°It¡¯s not her time,¡± Arthur said. ¡°But how can she live now¡ªin this world. How can she open her eyes and possibly ever smile again after what he just did to her?¡± ¡°He had to do that, Emily,¡± Mike said dully. ¡°She was in agony.¡± ¡°Then it shouldn¡¯t have been him to do it.¡± Emily sobbed again. ¡°He enjoyed it too much. Didn¡¯t you see his face?¡± ¡°Don¡¯t be so stupid,¡± Falcon said. ¡°He acted out of duty. That¡¯s all¡ªor I¡¯d have been the first to step in.¡± ¡°No, I know him, Falcon. He enjoyed it. If he really cared about stopping her pain, he should¡¯ve asked Jason to get in her head and knock her out.¡± ¡°He couldn¡¯t. No one but the king could touch her. She was still connected to the other realm,¡± Morgaine said. Emily¡¯s lips were cold on the back of my hand with the tear-soaked kiss she placed there. ¡°It just breaks my heart that she thought that was the only way to end her suffering.¡± ¡°That¡¯s not why she did it, Emily. She was trying to save David.¡± ¡°He doesn¡¯t deserve to be saved,¡± she said, and my eyes flew open. I drew my hand away, scowling at her. ¡°You don¡¯t get to decide that, Emily.¡± She sat back, sniffling, her eyes small with confusion. ¡°And you do?¡± ¡°Yes. Because I am Queen.¡± Emily went to speak, but she stopped when she saw what I felt radiating from my eyes, my skin, and my soul: I was right. I was the powerful being deemed godly by Mother Nature, and I was not to be trifled with. The decisions I made were in the best interests of my people, and that was the only reason even the mother of all life Herself allowed me the passage to the other side. Emily could argue with the old, human me all she wanted, but she could not argue with Mother Nature. ¡°All right.¡± Arthur stood and touched Emily¡¯s shoulder. ¡°Everyone out. I need to talk with Amara.¡± Em hesitated, but Arthur¡¯s eyes had this strong, kind of no nonsense edge to them then that offered a polite warning not to question him. He meant business, and everyone in the room knew it. They filed out one by one; Morg behind Emily, Quaid behind Blade, and Falcon last, offering me a sad kind of smile as he closed the door. I looked away, watching Arthur instead as he took the seat beside me where Emily had been. ¡°Are you mad at me, Arthur?¡± His eyes warmed, crinkling slightly on the edges. ¡°No, Amara. I¡¯m proud of you.¡± ¡°Proud?¡± I looked up at the glass dome, confused. I hadn¡¯t expected that. ¡°You¡¯ve grown up so much since I first met you.¡± His warm, so David-like hand took mine. ¡°I am . . . my gratitude toward you for doing everything in your power to save my nephew is beyond words. You¡¯ve not given up on him, Amara, ever, and I don¡¯t know even one person who¡¯d have had the strength or the heart to give their own life in exchange for a man that no longer loves them.¡± I pouted mockingly. ¡°I¡¯ll never give up on him, Arthur. And I¡¯m not done trying to save him. There has to be a way. I¡ª¡± ¡°I read your letter.¡± I stiffened a little. Goodbye letters were never supposed to be discussed after death. ¡°That¡¯s . . . kind of awkward.¡± We both laughed. ¡°Amara, what you told Jason in that letter¡ª¡± ¡°I told him the truth.¡± He nodded. ¡°I hope so. Because he loves you, and those words have given him reason to want to live again.¡± ¡°Well, I¡¯ll believe that when he starts drinking Lilithian Pure blood at dinner.¡± Arthur scratched just beside his eye. ¡°He put his name on the list for dinner tonight.¡± I drew my hand away from his and sat all the way up. ¡°Really?¡± ¡°It was a mistake giving that letter to Quaid if you intended it to be read after you were gone.¡± ¡°He took it straight to Jase, didn¡¯t he?¡± ¡°He wasn¡¯t born yesterday, Amara. How do you think he ended up on the Core in the first place?¡± ¡°Damn having all these smart buggers around.¡± I slapped the mattress, my still raw hand searing after. ¡°Did anyone else read it?¡± ¡°Only myself.¡± ¡°And David?¡± He shook his head. ¡°He refused.¡± ¡°Jason offered it to him?¡± ¡°No. I did.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°I saw Jason running toward the Throne Room with Quaid, no queen in sight, and I called to him, asked him what happened. His words echoed through the manor then, Amara, that you¡¯d gone to take your own life, and before I could react, David was behind me.¡± ¡°He heard?¡± ¡°He did. I offered the letter as proof. But he scrunched it up and pressed it into Jason¡¯s hand again, said farewells should not be written by those not going anywhere.¡± He stopped for a second, his eyes narrowed as the memory clearly replayed. ¡°And he ran toward the Stone alongside his brother.¡± ¡°Wow.¡± ¡°Yes, but . . . although Miss Emily was pleased David had rescued you, I don¡¯t believe it was¡ª¡± ¡°Because he loves me?¡± I said, nodding to myself. ¡°More like so I don¡¯t get the easy way out, right?¡± His lips made a thin line for a second. ¡°You know him too well.¡± ¡°Well, being married to someone will do that.¡± ¡°Yes,¡± he said simply and his attention slowly wandered to the balcony and the morning outside. ¡°Amara, my dear, when David pulled you away from the Stone, I noticed something . . . missing.¡± ¡°Missing?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± His eyes narrowed, fixing on my waist. ¡°The Mark.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± I smiled, running my hand over the blankets as if rubbing the Mark away. ¡°It¡¯s gone? All of it?¡± ¡°Apart from the smallest symbol just above your tailbone.¡± ¡°What does it look like¡ªor say?¡± ¡°I didn¡¯t get the chance to inspect it. I only saw it as Jason lifted you from the ground to carry you away.¡± ¡°Well, do you want to look now?¡± I sat forward a bit and motioned to my lower back. ¡°I¡¯m curious to¡ª¡± ¡°Not now, my dear. The Mark wasn¡¯t what I needed to talk to you about.¡± ¡°What is it then, Arthur?¡± I lay back on my pillow, twisting my long hair into a knot beside my jaw. ¡°I don¡¯t like that worried look.¡± He changed it to a soft, reassuring smile. ¡°Nothing is wrong, but I fear I have some news that. . .¡± He seemed to stop and think for a second, rewording that: ¡°That may or may not upset you.¡± ¡°But more likely will?¡± He sat back, but as he went to speak, my door popped open and Jason said, ¡°Knock-knock.¡± ¡°Jase.¡± I pushed my good hand into the mattress under me and sat up again. ¡°Hi.¡± ¡°Hi. Can I come in?¡± ¡°Of course.¡± ¡°Close the door,¡± Arthur said, waving a hand across the air. ¡°Sure.¡± The door shut and Jason appeared on my other side, dragging a chair closer to the bed. ¡°How¡¯s the hands?¡± I held them out. ¡°Better. This one¡¯s healed, but¡ª¡± I showed him my left hand. He cringed melodramatically. ¡°Want some blood?¡± ¡°Actually, I really do. But I better order a Sacrificial.¡± ¡°Nonsense,¡± Arthur cussed. ¡°Jason, feed the girl, and let¡¯s get on with it.¡± Jason shrugged as if to say, ¡°Don¡¯t argue with the boss,¡± and I drew a long breath to steady my heart. His vein was open and his wrist at my lips before I exhaled, and the sweet, mildly aphrodisiac quality of his life force ran down my throat, through my body, and made my damaged hand tingle. I didn¡¯t want to look at Jase¡¯s face while I drank from him¡ªdidn¡¯t want to see those eyes, see how much he was enjoying this, because I knew it would only make me want to bite him and, after tonight, he would finally be immune. We were finally free to be together, if I decided to take that road. And that just sent a hundred hot ideas into my mind. ¡°Shh,¡± he said, one hand sweeping my hair back softly, over and over. I hadn¡¯t made any noise, that I knew of, so I could only figure he heard all of that. I drew my lips away from the wetness of his skin, wiping my mouth with the cup of my palm. ¡°Thanks, Jase.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t mention it,¡± he said, his eyes locked with a smile onto mine, his hand staying firmly on my head. ¡°How¡¯s it feel now?¡± ¡°It?¡± He motioned down to my hand. ¡°Oh. Um.¡± I frayed my fingers and watched the last of the raw skin heal over like clouds passing the sun. ¡°It¡¯s good now.¡± ¡°Good,¡± Arthur cut in. ¡°Then we need to talk.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I settled down in my bed a bit. ¡°Bad news?¡± ¡°No, Ara. Brilliant news,¡± Jase said, his eyes lighting up then in an almost opposite way to Arthur¡¯s. ¡°Sweet girl. You¡¯re pregnant.¡± ¡°What?¡± I went to sit up again, but just stayed there with my hands poised to prop me up. ¡°Since when?¡± ¡°Since June, approximately,¡± Arthur said dully. ¡°You¡¯re about seventeen weeks,¡± Jase added. ¡°Seventeen? But¡ª¡± I counted in my head. Jason and I slept together, like, eight weeks ago. It was. . . ¡°It¡¯s David¡¯s baby, Amara,¡± Arthur said. ¡°But. . .¡± It didn¡¯t make sense. None of it. ¡°I. . . the pregnancy test was negative. I don¡¯t even have a belly. . .¡± ¡°You¡¯re Lilithian. Those tests measure certain hormones in human pregnancies. But, immortals don¡¯t change the way humans do. Yours won¡¯t show up on a test. And, as for the belly, well¡ª¡± Arthur smiled fondly at my waist. ¡°You have a bit of bump.¡± Page 64 I laid both hands across it. It was so small it felt only as if I¡¯d exhaled heavily and puffed it out a little. I wasn¡¯t anywhere near as big as my mom when she had Harry. ¡°Are you sure it¡¯s David¡¯s? I mean, this belly is more like a. . .¡±Advertisement ¡°A first trimester belly,¡± Arthur nodded. ¡°Lilith was the same, so I¡¯m told. At thirty weeks gestation, she barely looked twenty.¡± ¡°Oh my God.¡± I covered my mouth. ¡°I was pregnant when I tried to kill myself.¡± ¡°And she¡¯s okay.¡± Jason pulled my hand gently down from my mouth. ¡°She survived it, Ara. She¡¯s strong, and¡ª¡± ¡°You were only a few weeks pregnant when you jumped,¡± Arthur said. ¡°It is my opinion that the life force in the blood of immortals kept her alive for that few minutes your heart stopped.¡± ¡°But the fall alone could¡¯ve¡ª¡± ¡°She is well protected inside your immortal body. And she has an immortal body of her own. Even if she did, in fact, die with you, she is clearly as restorable as her mother.¡± ¡°Arthur actually thought she was dead.¡± Jase pointed his thumb at his uncle, half laughing. ¡°And with good reason, too,¡± Arthur defended. ¡°Your abdomen was torn open on one side. Upon closer inspection, I noticed that your uterus was enlarged. I wasn¡¯t sure if it was a pregnancy or swelling, but I was bound by time, so I stitched you back up before anyone could notice, and left what I hoped was a child with a fighting chance.¡± ¡°When I came in to see you after you woke, the old man let his thoughts slip for a second,¡± Jase said with a grin. ¡°He was trying to find a way to tell you the baby was dead.¡± ¡°Why¡¯d you think it was dead?¡± ¡°I¡¯d examined you after everyone left the room¡ªconfirmed you were pregnant, but. . .¡± ¡°He still couldn¡¯t hear a heartbeat,¡± Jase said. I looked at Arthur. ¡°After Jason¡¯s initial shock about the child¡¯s death, he looked at me as if I¡¯d gone insane and asked why I would tell you the child was dead, when he¡¯d just heard pulses coming from her tiny little brain.¡± ¡°Pulses?¡± I looked at Jase. ¡°Yeah. They¡¯re the electrical signals all living things give-off. You should know, Ara. You feel it when you walk in the forest, or¡ª¡± ¡°When I¡¯m in a room with a vampire.¡± I nodded to myself. ¡°Yeah, or a human.¡± ¡°And you can sense them, too?¡± I asked. Jase ¡°It¡¯s a talent we share.¡± He grinned. ¡°So, I knew she was still alive. We just . . . we can¡¯t hear her heart beat.¡± ¡°Why not?¡± ¡°Something to do with your skin, we figure. It not only protects her from savagery, but conceals her, too.¡± I laid a hand to my belly. ¡°I¡¯m . . . how come I didn¡¯t sense her?¡± ¡°Are you sure you didn¡¯t?¡± Jase asked, his smile growing. ¡°I haven¡¯t felt anything¡ªat all. Aside from hungry.¡± Arthur and Jason laughed. ¡°I can¡¯t believe I¡¯m pregnant.¡± ¡°It¡¯s pretty good news, huh?¡± Jase said. ¡°Yeah, but. . .¡± The crease on my brow deepened as I looked at Arthur. ¡°Why did you make plans to use the turkey baster if you knew all along I was pregnant?¡± He laughed. ¡°I never actually made plans, my dear. I put you off repeatedly, didn¡¯t I?¡± I nodded. ¡°I wasn¡¯t ready to tell you about the child, Amara, because¡ª¡± ¡°Because it meant there was no way to save David.¡± ¡°Yes. But now it seems we will lose him anyway.¡± I looked at Jase. His face was stone white and expressionless. ¡°Jase, what¡¯s wrong?¡± ¡°I was so cut up when I realised you were pregnant¡ªwhen. . .¡± ¡°When he realized he¡¯d bedded you for no good reason other than his own primal needs.¡± ¡°Uncle, it wasn¡¯t like that,¡± Jase said. Arthur stood and moved away. ¡°So, I was pregnant when we. . .?¡± ¡°Yes,¡± Jase said. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Ara. You know that if I¡¯d known that, I would never have¡ª¡± ¡°I know.¡± I stole his hand and kissed the knuckles. ¡°What¡¯s done is done. And it¡¯s in the past. None of it matters now.¡± ¡°Except that David is still hurt,¡± Arthur muttered. ¡°Yes.¡± I sat up more. ¡°I messed up¡ªbad.¡± ¡°Both of us did.¡± Jase smiled softly at me, squeezing my hand. ¡°But I can either move on from it, or wallow in it. And I have a baby to worry about now, so I¡¯m sorry, if David can¡¯t forgive and move on, too, even enough to be civil to me, then that¡¯s his loss. Not mine.¡± Arthur sat down on the couch across the room. ¡°Then I pray he finds civility before he leaves.¡± ¡°Leaves?¡± ¡°Ara.¡± Jase waited until I looked at him. ¡°Arthur¡¯s handing the dagger over to David tomorrow. He¡ª¡± ¡°No!¡± I threw my covers back and leaped out of bed. ¡°He can¡¯t. Not yet. He hasn¡¯t . . . I mean, does he even know?¡± I clutched my stomach. ¡°Has anyone told him?¡± ¡°He knows,¡± said a dry, cool voice. I looked across the balcony to where the long-legged king leaned sideways against the railing, his arms folded. ¡°David, please tell me you¡¯re not going to kill Drake tomorrow.¡± He looked at his uncle. ¡°Give us a moment.¡± ¡°Of course.¡± Arthur appeared across the room and opened the bedroom door. ¡°Jason?¡± Jase sighed, touching my arm as he passed. ¡°I¡¯ll be right outside if. . .¡± He looked over at David. ¡°If you need me.¡± I reached down and squeezed his hand. ¡°Thanks.¡± Tension spread around the room then as the door grated in its frame, coming to a complete stop with me on one side, and my protector on the other. ¡°I¡¯m not here to hurt you,¡± David muttered angrily. ¡°I may hate you, Ara, but I will not cause you physical harm.¡± My shoulders relaxed. ¡°Did you know?¡± I asked. ¡°Before today?¡± He shook his head, his cold stare staying on my face as I moved across the room and stepped out into the white sunlight. ¡°Guess this explains why none of my jeans fit,¡± I said, relieved. ¡°Your jeans don¡¯t fit because you¡¯re fat, Ara. Don¡¯t use pregnancy as an excuse.¡± My lips fell apart a little. ¡°David, that¡¯s¡ª¡± ¡°Shut up. I didn¡¯t come here to debate your lack of self-worth.¡± He turned away, leaning his elbows on the marble ledge, the world below his canvas for thought. ¡°Then why did you come? Just to taunt me?¡± ¡°I came to make something very clear to you.¡± ¡°Then, by all means,¡± I said, standing beside him, knowing I was crossing the boundaries by getting this close. ¡°Enlighten me.¡± ¡°In exchange for the dagger, I promised my uncle I would stay for the birth of the child.¡± I smiled, trying not to laugh with joy. David pretended not to notice. ¡°But that gives you no right to attempt contact with me. Gives you no right to look at, talk to, or even address me as anything more personal than your king. Do I make myself clear?¡± ¡°No. That¡¯s ridiculous, I¡¯m your¡ª¡± ¡°You are nothing to me!¡± He spun around, yelling in my face. ¡°Well, I may not be, but she is your daughter.¡± I touched my belly to emphasize her tiny little existence. He rolled his shoulders back, growing taller inch by inch, his bottom lip coming forward with detest. ¡°A fact I¡¯m forced to accept. And you are lucky she bares my blood¡ªnot my brother¡¯s, or I¡¯d have ripped it from your womb.¡± ¡°How dare you spea¡ª¡± ¡°Easy.¡± He moved closer. ¡°I care nothing for you, or for it. I am not your husband. I am not her father. I am a man forced by his word to stay and witness something he does not condone.¡± ¡°So, you don¡¯t condone your own daughter.¡± ¡°That¡ª¡± He pointed at my belly. ¡°Is no daughter of mine.¡± ¡°How can you say that? She has your blood. We made her. She¡ª¡± ¡°She was spawned under false pretences, Ara, in a relationship I believed to be love.¡± ¡°But it¡ª¡± ¡°It was nothing but a lie.¡± He waved a hand through the air to shut me up. ¡°And she is as tainted as you.¡± ¡°She¡¯s innocent, David!¡± ¡°Her body was growing in you when you betrayed me.¡± His voice broke. ¡°I will never touch her. I will never touch you. And I will certainly not accept her as my own.¡± I didn¡¯t realize I was crying until my chest shook and a cold tear dropped down, landing on my bare foot. David looked into me with nothing but hatred in his eyes¡ªnot one shred of compassion shining through. ¡°Why would Arthur make you stay then?¡± I asked. ¡°If you hate us so much.¡± ¡°Because my uncle is hoping that by forcing me to wait for the dagger, I may find it in my heart to forgive you,¡± he said stiffly, looking down his nose at this sobbing mess. ¡°But he¡¯s a fool.¡± I nodded. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, David.¡± ¡°For what?¡± he spat. ¡°I¡¯m sorry he forced those terms on you. That¡¯s. . .¡± I shuddered. ¡°That¡¯s really cruel.¡± He cleared his throat. ¡°Thank you, anyway¡ªfor stopping by,¡± I said, going blank-faced after. I wasn¡¯t really sure why I said that. ¡°You can see yourself out, I¡¯m sure?¡± He bowed his head once and walked away. ¡°Oh, and . . . David?¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°Please tell Arthur and Jason I¡¯m sleeping now.¡± I folded over a little, standing tall again quickly. ¡°I¡¯m tired.¡± His answering response was a door closed and a wordless, sad nothingness left in his wake. I looked out at the field in the distance, seeing the tip of the lighthouse, thinking back to the first time I saw this place. Nothing about the landscape had changed, yet everything within it was upside-down and no longer fit the way it should. His anger at me went beyond hatred and worse, because of my crimes, he would not only hate me for the rest of forever, but he¡¯d hate our little girl too. ¡°I¡¯m so sorry, little baby.¡± I touched my belly, sending my words and all the love I had in my heart through to her. ¡°I¡¯m so sorry.¡± The day went so slowly, with me stuck on bed rest, that I read every book in my room before lunch, and found myself trolling the library shelves for more I could read up on about my people and the laws of our society. But a pair of arms suddenly wrapped my neck, stopping me dead in my tracks, Emily¡¯s shrill voice echoing my name in my own ears. Page 65 ¡°Congratulations,¡± she trilled.Advertisement ¡°Thank you.¡± I stepped back, rearranging the pile of books in my arms. ¡°Are you excited?¡± she asked, patting my belly. ¡°You must be so excited. What did David say? Oh, my God, was he totally excited, too?¡± ¡°He, uh¡ª¡± I started, but what was I supposed to tell her? To tell everyone? That he disowned both our child and me? ¡°He just said that nothing had changed between he and I.¡± ¡°Well, I hadn¡¯t expected that much.¡± An eager smile replaced that frown. ¡°But I bet he¡¯s thrilled to finally have his own little baby.¡± I moved my mouth into an awkward attempt at a neutral smile. ¡°Well, at least you got the baby before all the. . .¡± She patted my arm. ¡°You know?¡± I looked down at her hand. Why had everyone suddenly started doing that to me? Every second person I passed that knew the truth about David and I patted my arm. It was the worst form of pity one could offer. ¡°I have to go,¡± I said coldly and walked past her, hugging my new study materials. ¡°Well, enjoy your books,¡± she called casually. ¡°And don¡¯t forget they¡¯re announcing the ball today.¡± I stopped again. ¡°Ball?¡± ¡°Yeah. Didn¡¯t David tell you?¡± ¡°No.¡± ¡°The House are holding a ball in honour of our new princess.¡± She presented my midsection. ¡°They¡¯re making the formal announcement at Court today.¡± ¡°Great.¡± I rubbed my temple. ¡°What did David say?¡± ¡°I wasn¡¯t there when they discussed it.¡± ¡°And why wasn¡¯t I?¡± ¡°Duh,¡± she said, shaking her head. ¡°You were unconscious.¡± ¡°So, Arthur told everyone else I was pregnant before he told me?¡± ¡°No. He told David first, and David told the House. I didn¡¯t even find out until after Nate did. He told me.¡± I settled back on my heels, noticing I was leaning toward Emily a bit much, as if I were about to attack her. ¡°They¡¯ll expect us to dance.¡± ¡°Who?¡± ¡°David and I. Our people will expect us to dance at the ball.¡± ¡°So?¡± ¡°So . . . he¡¯ll probably ¡®accidentally¡¯ squeeze me too tight and pop my lung.¡± ¡°And he¡¯ll get one to match,¡± Blade said, forgetting for a second that guards are supposed to guard, not join the conversation. I narrowed my eyes at him, then turned back to Em. ¡°You could always ask Jason to be your date,¡± she suggested. ¡°And how will I explain that to my people?¡± ¡°Tell them you¡¯re courting¡ªthat there may be an intent to marry. It doesn¡¯t have to be true,¡± she added, as I was about to freak. ¡°But at least you could dance the night with someone you trust, and no one would turn their head.¡± ¡°No.¡± I spun on my heel and started walking again. ¡°The less I see of Jason, the better.¡± ¡°I thought you¡ª¡± Em started, but Blade shushed her sweetly with a finger to his lip as he passed, following me up the stairs. My door swung open, no one having knocked first, and a group of people entered without invitation. I lowered my book into my lap and watched three giant, gold-rimmed mirrors wander over to my sitting room, followed by a flow of portly women with folds of fabric over their arms, lead by an older woman, whose slim glasses and tape-measure-scarf gave her away as the seamstress who fitted my coronation dress. ¡°Mrs Hemsley,¡± I said, standing up to be polite. ¡°Nice to see you again.¡± ¡°The pleasure is all mine, dear.¡± She pushed her glasses up her nose, appraising me. ¡°The announcement for the ball has just been sent to the Lilithian Times for tomorrow¡¯s print run, and I thought I¡¯d get a head-start on your fitting. Falcon let me in.¡± She turned and motioned to my guard standing guiltily in the doorway. He showed both palms and backed away. Something told me he wasn¡¯t given much choice but to let the old woman in. I laughed. ¡°Well, you¡¯re welcome any time, Mrs Hemsley.¡± ¡°Magda, please,¡± she reminded me. ¡°Of course. Magda.¡± I nodded. ¡°Now, if you¡¯ll just set your pretty little self over there on those boxes, we¡¯ll get these measurements done and then we can talk fabrics.¡± She cupped both hands together, turning to the mirrored pedestal area they¡¯d set up just by the windows, and stood waiting. I sighed and wandered over, stepping up onto the pink velvet box wedged between the three mirrors, holding my arms out as if I were an airplane. A tape measure wrapped my waist first, Magda making a face then that I saw too clearly in the reflection. ¡°My, you have put on a few centimetres, haven¡¯t you?¡± I swallowed, studying my fuller figure. Now that I could see myself from three different angles, I finally saw what David meant. My butt and thighs were at least one size bigger. But it didn¡¯t look terrible. I looked. . . ¡°You look so healthy,¡± Magda said, stepping back a bit. ¡°You¡¯ve got that lovely pregnancy glow, and your immortally seventeen-year-old body has finally taken on the shape of a woman.¡± ¡°You think?¡± I ran my hand down my hip. ¡°My darling little girl, this is you all grown up.¡± She offered the scene before me. I took a good, long look at myself in the mirror, and in the kind tone of the way she presented me, I actually saw the beauty in my reflection. ¡°Do you think I¡¯ll stay like this even after I have the baby?¡± ¡°One could not be sure, sweet. Does it really matter to you?¡± I shrugged. ¡°I kinda like having curves.¡± Magda laughed. ¡°Try eating a bit more then, and those curves will stay on your hips as long as you want. Now¡ª¡± She lifted my arm and laid the tape measure to my rib. ¡°Let¡¯s get this done.¡± I twisted and turned and jerked about as she measured every inch of me, keeping my eye on the length of the shadows outside. It was getting dark, and I hadn¡¯t had time to discuss a very important matter with Jase yet. If this took much longer, it¡¯d be dinnertime before we knew it, and then I¡¯d have to wait until tomorrow. But time was running out. David was meeting Arthur in the morning to get that dagger. And yeah, he promised to wait until the baby was born before he used it, but I didn¡¯t trust him. Not one bit. ¡°Lift your top up there for me, lovey. Just want to get a proper measurement of that belly.¡± I slowly drew my shirt up to my ribs, noticing a slight chill in the air as it touched my bare skin. ¡°Now don¡¯t go sucking yer gut in, girl.¡± She slapped my bottom softly. ¡°It won¡¯t help your dress fit any better on the day.¡± I let my stomach out to its natural position, and both Magda and I drew a quick breath. I hadn¡¯t seen my belly when I was standing up like this, uncovered by baggy shirts, and it seemed to disappear if I laid flat or sat down, like it almost tucked itself in. So, seeing the almost bowl-like bulge coming from just between my hipbones was a little of a shock¡ªfor both of us. ¡°There it is,¡± she said kindly. ¡°You mustn¡¯t try to hide it so much, Amara.¡± ¡°I just . . . I only just found out I was pregnant. I thought I was just fat.¡± ¡°Well, you¡¯re not. You¡¯re perfect.¡± ¡°You think so?¡± I asked, running both hands down my belly. ¡°I prefer a time when women stayed hidden until they birthed,¡± David said. Magda and I turned quickly to where he stood in the now open doorway. ¡°What are you doing in ¡®ere?¡± Magda said, waving him off like a fly. ¡°No men allowed.¡± ¡°I¡¯m the king. I can go where I please.¡± ¡°Well, make yer business known and be off with ya, lad; I¡¯ve a fittin¡¯ to finish and a dress to make in just three days,¡± she tittered, and lifted my top again, tossing the measuring tape around my waist. I tensed, wishing I could pull my shirt down or suck my gut in again. ¡°Did you need something, David?¡± When he didn¡¯t answer, I dared to look at him through the reflection, but his eyes were on my belly, his lip lifted in disgust. ¡°Pregnancy really is quite offensive. I fail to see the beauty in a heinous protrusion sticking out from one¡¯s abdomen.¡± ¡°Your Majesty!¡± Magda gasped. ¡°You¡¯ll break the poor girl¡¯s heart.¡± ¡°Oh, I wouldn¡¯t worry, seamstress. Ara doesn¡¯t have a heart to break. Look at her¡ª¡± He angled his head toward me. ¡°Nothing I say ever matters to her.¡± Magda looked up at me, shaking her head. ¡°Okay, so I¡¯m fat and disgusting.¡± I tried to sound pragmatic, but I just sounded kind of angry. ¡°What else did you come here to say?¡± ¡°I need a swatch.¡± ¡°For Mr Granger?¡± Magda asked, jotting numbers down on her page. ¡°Yes,¡± David said. ¡°Well, I¡¯ve not talked fabrics, yet, so Mr Granger will need to meet with me later to coordinate the outfits.¡± ¡°Very well.¡± David laid both hands behind his back and turned on his heel, leaving the door open after he left. ¡°Never mind him, lovey.¡± Magda lowered my top for me. ¡°Men are like pet dogs; once you get pregnant, they ¡®ave to play up a little to make sure they¡¯re not left out.¡± I laughed, wiping a small, cool tear from my cheek. ¡°Let¡¯s have none of that. This is happy times.¡± She patted my hip, bending to measure my leg again. ¡°Now, we¡¯ve got these measurements all sorted. Time to talk fabric.¡± I smiled, just wishing this was over so I could go down to the Training Hall and toy around with my powers for a while. That chat with Jason would have to wait until tomorrow. Right now, all I wanted to do was bust up a few boulders¡ªand maybe any unsuspecting vampires that happened to pass. Chapter Thirteen For a vampire, he wasn¡¯t really all that alert. I half expected that, as soon as I pushed the creaky secret door open and then closed it, he¡¯d jump up and put a blade to my throat, dropping it in shock when he realized who was in his room at this hour. But he just laid there, sleeping peacefully, breathing deeply like all his worries had been blown away in the wind. And I knew it was my recent confession of love that had eased his soul so much. A big part of me wished then, in seeing him this way, that I could forget David and just love Jason. It hurt him every time I tried to hold on to David, I knew that, but David had my heart first. I guess I just needed to be sure all hope for us was gone before I could give my heart away again. Jase understood that. He was good like that. I wandered over and climbed up on his bed, a huge smile sweeping my lips for how cute and kind of sweet he looked when he was sleeping. ¡°Jase,¡± I whispered, poking him softly in the arm. ¡°Jase.¡± Page 66 He groaned and rolled over a little, snapping awake when his eyes met mine. ¡°Ara.¡±Advertisement ¡°Mornin¡¯, sunshine.¡± The sheet slipped down his bare chest a bit as he pushed up on his elbow. ¡°What¡¯s going on? Are you okay?¡± ¡°Yep.¡± I sat back on my knees. ¡°I had an idea.¡± He rubbed his head, glancing off at his bedside clock. ¡°An idea at five in the morning?¡± ¡°Yes, and it¡¯s brilliant.¡± I slapped the covers. ¡°Get up. Get dressed.¡± ¡°Wait.¡± He grabbed my arm before I could climb off the bed. ¡°Why?¡± ¡°The answer¡¯s been right in front of me the whole time.¡± ¡°It has?¡± ¡°Yes. If you face a battle with swords but hold only a stick, sneak away in the middle of the night and even the odds.¡± ¡°Is that something Arthur said to you?¡± ¡°Yeah, ages ago, but I got to thinking. We¡¯ve been trying to find a way to save David¡ªtrying to stop him from using that dagger. Well¡ª¡± I leaned forward ever so slightly, grinning like a little kid. ¡°If there is no dagger, he can¡¯t use it.¡± ¡°Ara.¡± He rubbed his face again, his eyes heavy, half closed. ¡°If we can¡¯t kill Drake, he comes in here in a few months and steals our baby¡ª¡± He presented my stomach. ¡°Our baby?¡± I raised a brow at him, folding my arms slowly. ¡°Yes.¡± He sat up more, reaching across to sweep his hand along my waist, cupping the other one right over my belly. ¡°Our baby. I might not¡¯ve put her in there, Ara, but I love you, and I love anything inside you, and since I see no one else around here making a claim to her, I¡¯m officially putting mine forward.¡± ¡°Jase.¡± I placed my hand over his. ¡°Don¡¯t do this to yourself. My greater plan here is¡ª¡± ¡°To give David no way out in the hopes he¡¯ll one day forgive you and come back to you?¡± ¡°Mm-hm.¡± He laughed and sat back, dropping his forearm over his brow. ¡°Fine. I¡¯ll help you. But I don¡¯t think your plan¡¯ll work.¡± ¡°Which part?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t think he¡¯ll ever love you again, Ara, even if he has to stick around forever,¡± he said softly. ¡°Are you prepared for that?¡± I nodded. ¡°And what about Drake? He will come for the baby.¡± ¡°I¡¯m. . .¡± I hesitated. I knew I could trust Jason, but even he would go to great lengths to protect me, which could include hindering my plan. ¡°You arranged a meeting with Drake,¡± he said with a nod. ¡°Damn it! Stop reading my mind.¡± I slapped his arm. ¡°Stop being so transparent.¡± He playfully slapped mine back. A wave of silence rolled over the bed then. I sat back on the pillows beside Jase and stared forward. ¡°I won¡¯t stop you, Ara, if this is what you want.¡± ¡°You won¡¯t?¡± ¡°No.¡± He scooped my hand up in his. ¡°I know Drake won¡¯t hurt you while you¡¯re carrying the child he¡¯s waited centuries for. But if you plan to talk with him, at least do it on manor grounds¡ªwhere we can protect you if he tries to kidnap you, or something.¡± ¡°Already the plan.¡± ¡°Good.¡± I squeezed his hand. ¡°Hey . . . thanks, Jase.¡± ¡°For what?¡± ¡°For letting me do this.¡± ¡°You don¡¯t need to thank me. I¡¯m not letting you do this, Ara. I don¡¯t control you.¡± ¡°But you do give your blessing.¡± He exhaled, patting my hand. ¡°I think we should¡¯ve negotiated with Drake from the start.¡± ¡°And, see?¡± I presented Jase in all his shirtless glory. ¡°This is why I want you on my council.¡± He smiled. ¡°When the world spins on its axis and Mike and Falcon see I¡¯m not the enemy, then we can talk about that. But, right now, we need to discuss what you¡¯ll do if you don¡¯t like Drake¡¯s terms of agreement.¡± ¡°Already got that figured out,¡± I said chirpily. ¡°Okay.¡± He folded his fingers together in his lap, leaning slightly sideways. ¡°Then reveal to me your diabolical plot.¡± ¡°If he refuses to negotiate within what I consider reasonable terms, my expert team of military operations specialists will find a way to lure him into a trap and imprison him for eternity. Then, once you and I have researched my powers a bit more, we¡¯ll come up with a way to kill him¡ªwithout taking someone else¡¯s life in the process.¡± ¡°Hm.¡± He pressed his lips into a thin line. ¡°Guess you have thought of everything. But¡ª¡± ¡°But?¡± He sat taller, lifting the blanket so he could shuffle closer. ¡°I want you to take Nhym with you when you meet Drake. It might not kill him, but if you use your light through the blade, it¡¯ll stun him long enough for you to escape.¡± I nodded, trying to remember where I put that sword. ¡°It¡¯s under your bed,¡± Jase said. ¡°Oh. That¡¯s right. Thanks.¡± ¡°Any time.¡± He nodded. ¡°Now, when do you want to steal the Dagger of Yahanna?¡± I grinned. ¡°Right now.¡± We snuck back up the secret passage to my room and stood by the door, peeking out to where Quaid sat¡ªguarding me while I apparently slept. ¡°What¡¯s he doing?¡± I whispered. ¡°Playing on his phone.¡± ¡°What¡¯s the plan?¡± He shut the door a little. ¡°I can put him to sleep, but if anyone happens by, they¡¯ll raise an alarm.¡± ¡°Okay. We¡¯ll just have to be quick.¡± ¡°All right, but . . . do you even know where the dagger is now?¡± ¡°Yeah. David had it before he went to Elysium, but he gave it back as a show of his love for me.¡± I kind of laughed at how long ago all that felt now. ¡°But that was the fake, anyway. Arthur never gave him the real dagger.¡± Jase frowned. ¡°There¡¯s a fake?¡± I nodded. ¡°Well, how will we know which one¡¯s which?¡± ¡°Easy.¡± I smirked. ¡°We take them both.¡± ¡°Well, where¡¯s the real dagger?¡± ¡°That¡¯s . . . the hard part.¡± ¡°I see.¡± He shut the door completely, glaring down at me, unamused. ¡°You want me to put my uncle, whom I love and respect, into a deep sleep, then you want me to sneak into his mind and find the daggers?¡± I nodded, half shrugging as though it was no big deal. ¡°Right.¡± He nodded and opened the door again. ¡°The things I¡¯ll do for a girl.¡± I laughed, but it was bit too loud. ¡°Shh.¡± Jase shut the door again. ¡°He¡¯s standing up.¡± ¡°Crap. Do something.¡± His smile moved slowly across his lips. ¡°Done.¡± ¡°What¡¯d you do?¡± I pushed past him and looked out into the hall: everyone was sleeping¡ªQuaid and the five otherwise usually invisible guards lining the halls. But lying on the floor like that, half of them snoring, all of them sprawled out, they were very noticeable indeed. I turned back and grinned at Jase. ¡°You are so cool.¡± He brushed his collar. ¡°All in a day¡¯s work.¡± ¡°Now, come on.¡± I grabbed his hand and dragged him from the room. ¡°We need to hurry.¡± ¡°More for Quaid¡¯s sake than our own. If Falcon sees him, Ara¡ª¡± He motioned behind us to the lump of a guard on the ground. ¡°I know.¡± I stopped right outside Arthur¡¯s door, momentarily reconsidering this. ¡°I don¡¯t wanna get anyone in trouble.¡± ¡°Well, there¡¯s no sense in turning back now, sweet girl. Let¡¯s just get it over with.¡± ¡°You¡¯re right.¡± I reached out to touch Arthur¡¯s door handle, but stopped. ¡°He¡¯s not an early riser is he?¡± Jase laughed breathily. ¡°Most days, yeah.¡± ¡°Great,¡± I said nervously. ¡°Well, I¡¯ll turn the handle, and you put him out as soon as the door¡¯s open.¡± ¡°Okay. One . . . two. . .¡± ¡°Three.¡± I pushed the door open and readied myself for Arthur to look up and ask what we were doing, but he was sound asleep in his bed, just a pile of blankets and pillows: snoring blankets and pillows. I shut the door behind Jase and I. ¡°He snores?¡± Jase just laughed. ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°Wow. Who¡¯d have thought?¡± ¡°Nah, wait for it.¡± He grabbed my wrist and stopped me. ¡°Just wait . . . about . . . two seconds.¡± I waited and, there it was: a deep, thundering roll of a sound like a handful of pebbles had been thrown down the back of Arthur¡¯s throat. It peaked to a high whistle, his breath stopping for a second. And I held my own, pausing until his started again, hissing out of him like the deep groan of an angry cat. Jase and I burst out laughing. I covered my nose with the back of my wrist so I wouldn¡¯t snot all over the place. ¡°I have got to stop laughing through my nose.¡± ¡°Want a wipe?¡± He offered his sleeve. I bumped it away. ¡°I¡¯m fine. Let¡¯s just find this dagger.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± Jase turned all business. ¡°I¡¯ll get inside Arthur¡¯s head while you get the fake.¡± ¡°Right.¡± I nodded and tiptoed off to Arthur¡¯s dresser drawer, slowly and quietly pulling it open while Jason positioned himself on the bed, placing both hands to his uncle¡¯s head. The dagger was there, in its box, just where Arthur had left it¡ªopen to any who might want to get their hands on it. I was certain it was the fake. ¡°How¡¯s the hunt going?¡± I asked, stuffing the box under my shirt. ¡°I¡ª¡± He squinted. ¡°Just gimme a sec.¡± I huffed a little impatiently, looking around the room. The sun was peeking over the hills outside, bringing the dawn and all that came with it. The Guard would change over soon, and if we hadn¡¯t finished our mission and climbed back into bed by then, someone would come along and find six men sleeping in the corridor. ¡°Ara?¡± Jase said, but he sounded kind of nervous. ¡°You¡¯ve got it.¡± ¡°Got what?¡± He pulled his hands away from Arthur¡¯s head and looked at me, then at the lump under my shirt. ¡°That¡¯s the real dagger.¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not kidding.¡± He appeared by Arthur¡¯s long oak table and waved me over. ¡°Lay it out here. I wanna see it.¡± I drew the box out from under my shirt and handed it to Jason. ¡°Are you sure it¡¯s the real one?¡± ¡°As sure as the sun will rise,¡± he said, thumbing the lid open. ¡°How can you tell?¡± Page 67 ¡°Because there is no fake.¡±Advertisement ¡°You¡¯re kidding?¡± ¡°Nope.¡± He grinned, closing the box again. I looked back at Arthur. ¡°That cheeky devil.¡± Jase just nodded. ¡°He¡¯s pretty clever. I did wonder how he had time to forge a fake.¡± ¡°It wouldn''t have surprised me either way.¡± ¡°Well¡ª¡± He tucked the box under his arm. ¡°Best we get this somewhere safe.¡± ¡°Any ideas?¡± ¡°In plain sight.¡± ¡°Where in plain sight?¡± ¡°The weapons room.¡± I nodded. ¡°Good idea.¡± It was still dark down this end of the island, the sun hidden behind the tops of the trees, leaving the shelves, the rows of swords in stands, and the shields lined up around the space all shadowed and grey. The guard on duty had fallen asleep at his post before we even got here, so sneaking in hadn¡¯t been tricky at all. Knowing where to put the dagger, however, wasn¡¯t as easy. ¡°So much heartache over such an ordinary blade,¡± I said absently, running my fingers along the jewelled handle. Jase reached down from the towering shelf he was climbing. ¡°Pass it up.¡± As I went to close the lid, though, a small corner of yellowing paper caught my eye. ¡°Wait.¡± ¡°Ara, I¡¯m hanging on with one finger right now.¡± ¡°Well, just . . . hang on for longer,¡± I said playfully and put the box down again, ignoring Jase¡¯s sigh as I dug the frayed parchment out from under the velvet lining. ¡°What is it, Ara?¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± I read it for a second. ¡°Oh, it¡¯s just the page describing how to use the dagger.¡± ¡°Wait.¡± He showed a flat palm. ¡°Don¡¯t put it back in. I wanna see it.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I tucked the page into my jeans pocket and closed the box, tossing it all the way up to Jase. He caught it awkwardly between his chest and the side of his forearm, then reached both hands up to the very top of the shelf, shifting and shoving things aside until he dropped back to the ground with a graceful bend of knees, dusting his hands off on his jeans. ¡°All done.¡± ¡°Great. And no one will know it¡¯s up there?¡± ¡°Not unless they take inventory.¡± ¡°Good.¡± I grinned. ¡°Show me the page.¡± ¡°Oh. Um¡ª¡± I pulled it from my pocket and handed it to Jase. He scanned the symbols slowly, his lips closing, eyes getting smaller and smaller. ¡°I need light.¡± ¡°Jase?¡± I whispered in a kind of loud voice. ¡°What are you doing? We need to get out of here.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t see properly, but¡ª¡± He laid the page on the table and waved his phone over it, lighting the up the small space around us. ¡°This isn¡¯t right.¡± ¡°What¡¯s not?¡± ¡°This ink. It doesn¡¯t match the date on the parchment.¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± I spun the page around so I could see. ¡°Look.¡± He pointed to a weirdly shaped letter. ¡°To the average vampire, this is just an ordinary document, but to my expert eye, this symbol, which indicates the text was written at some point in the fifteen-hundreds, doesn¡¯t match the age of the ink. This ink¡ª¡± He licked his thumb and rubbed the corner of the page a few times. ¡°It¡¯s less than ten years old.¡± ¡°How do you know that? Wait¡ª¡± I put both hands up. ¡°Don¡¯t tell me. I probably don¡¯t want the lengthy explanation.¡± He touched my arm softly. ¡°Let¡¯s just say it has a lot to do with pigment.¡± ¡°So, what does that mean¡ªif this document is a forgery?¡± He stood straight again slowly. ¡°I¡¯m not sure.¡± ¡°Do you think maybe the dagger isn¡¯t what we think it is?¡± ¡°Anything could be possible.¡± ¡°But, wouldn¡¯t Arthur have known the document was forged?¡± ¡°No.¡± He laughed and folded the page up, handing it back to me. ¡°It¡¯s just not his area of expertise.¡± I smirked, catching the swagger in his tone. ¡°Oh, big-noting yourself, huh?¡± ¡°Big-noting?¡± ¡°Urm, yeah, it means . . . like, to boastfully exaggerate your own worth.¡± His lips turned down with thought. ¡°Well, I am pretty darn clever.¡± I wrapped my arm around his waist and we wandered out of the weapons room. ¡°Yeah, even I have to admit that.¡± Quaid walked me all the way down to the secret garden, giving tips on how to swing my sword and position my feet, stating that I didn¡¯t really need to practice privately because I was a better ¡®swordsmen¡¯¡ªhis words¡ªthan any of the men in the Core. And I knew that, but the ¡®private¡¯ practice was merely a clever cover. I farewelled him, asking him to wait outside in case I ¡®cut¡¯ myself, and pushed the heavy door to the Garden of Lilith open, holding my breath the whole time. The door closed with an eerie echo, sealing me in, and a dark figure showed itself, his familiar black cloak brushing the ground as he stood and cast his gaze upon me. I stopped to take him in: his short dark hair, set in thick, wavy locks around his face; his pale skin, so youthful it was almost painful to look at, and then there was his eyes: the cobblestone path under me led the way in pale blues and creams to his feet, the grey bark of leafy green trees behind him creating a backdrop of nature¡¯s pleasantries, all lit warmly by the golden rays of the midday sun, making the water in the fountain beside him sparkle¡ªbut none of it compared to the brilliant blue of his eyes, how they drew me into him without need for footsteps, leading us face to face, as if our eyes had locked but an inch away. ¡°Amara,¡± he said, bowing his head. I snapped back into myself then, noticing the sudden distance that lay between us. ¡°Hello, Drake.¡± ¡°Please¡ª¡± He turned and offered the small white garden table behind him. ¡°Take a seat.¡± ¡°Of course.¡± I nodded to wake myself up, readjusting Nhym in her belt as I walked. Brown boots over shadow over cobblestones, I took the two steps leading up to the garden and offered my uncle a smile. He smiled back, drawing a chair from under the table for me. ¡°You look lovely in yellow,¡± he said. ¡°Just like my little sister.¡± I sat down, turning my sword belt so Nhym aimed at the ground, not my knee. ¡°Yellow¡¯s my favourite colour.¡± ¡°Is that so?¡± He sat down, his brows moving up in surprise. ¡°It was Lili¡¯s too.¡± ¡°Well, we were related.¡± I leaned an elbow on the table, removing it quickly so I didn¡¯t seem ill-mannered. ¡°Yes, you were, weren¡¯t you?¡± He considered me for a second. ¡°And I must say that, of all her descendants, Amara, you are by far the prettiest. I can only pray my child will be just like her mother.¡± ¡°Your child?¡± ¡°Yes,¡± he said, motioning to my belly. ¡°We¡¯ve waited such a long time for this miracle. In fact, I brought a gift for her.¡± I sat back a bit, preparing myself mentally as he reached into a small leather bag on the side of his belt. Clearly he and I were in for a bit of an argument today since he¡¯d already claimed my baby as his own. ¡°This belonged to my beloved wife when she was alive.¡± He laid something on the table, keeping his long, youthful fingers over it for a second. ¡°I thought you should have it. Wear it while she grows inside you.¡± ¡°Whoa. Hold on.¡± I put my hand up and, at that moment, Drake drew his away, revealing a giant oval, almost gaudy-looking emerald stone, set into a fine weave of golden chain. ¡°That¡¯s beautiful, Drake, but . . . did you just say your wife is¡ª¡± ¡°Growing inside you,¡± he stated factually, his eyes moving then to my belly as if he looked upon her for the first time in centuries¡ªhis beloved Anandene. ¡°Okay.¡± I blocked his view, crossing two hands over my midsection. ¡°Let¡¯s get one thing straight here. This is not, nor will it ever be, that witch!¡± ¡°Witch!¡± He shot up out of his chair and stood over me, darkening the sun with the mere presence of anger. ¡°You will do well to remember that I loved that witch, and have gone to great lengths to see her reborn, Amara-Rose. Speak ill of her again and I will knock you unconscious. Do I make myself clear?¡± I could only nod a few times, both arms wrapping my baby, sheltering her from the raw emotion emanating off that vampire. He sat back down, and the sun came out again, the birds in the trees making merry little songs around us once more, while the leaves on the trees danced in the wind. ¡°You have heard many stories about this contract, I am sure. But only one is true.¡± ¡°And which one is that?¡± I asked spitefully, still sitting to attention. ¡°My sister Lilith gave her soul to see Anandene reborn, and I have waited many centuries for all the pieces to finally come together. You carry inside you the blood of my sister, mixed with oldest, most pure blood of nobles known to mankind, but she will bare the soul of my long-dead wife.¡± ¡°No.¡± I looked around as if there was something I could say or do to weaken the meaning in his words. ¡°She can¡¯t. I won¡¯t let that happe¡ª¡± ¡°It already has. The moment she was conceived, you broke the curse you carried to bear only females, and you opened a portal for Anandene¡¯s soul to cross over¡ªcarried along the path all souls travel when a new child is conceived.¡± ¡°So that¡¯s just it? She¡¯s already Anandene? You don¡¯t need to do a ritual or¡ª¡± ¡°No.¡± He laughed. ¡°There are many ways to reinsert a soul, but this is the only way that ensures permanent success. If I simply reinserted her into a body that shared the blood of her lineage, she could not have been immortal. She would still be a witch, but would not live forever. And it is that desire that got her killed in the first place.¡± ¡°How so?¡± ¡°She attempted a spell, using the Stone¡ª¡± ¡°And Lilith had to kill her to undo the curse she invoked?¡± I nodded when Drake did. ¡°So, you what? You devised this plan over centuries just so you could have forever together?¡± He smiled simply. ¡°You¡¯re in love, are you not?¡± ¡°Yeah, but¡ª¡± ¡°What lengths would you go to?¡± I leaned back, exhaling. ¡°And this is why the contract promises you the baby?¡± ¡°It promises the baby will be born, yes, and in exchange I will give back what I took. But it does not promise me possession of the child. She will come for me when her memories return.¡± ¡°Memories?¡± ¡°One day, everything she was in her past life will come back to her, and she will look for me.¡± Page 68 We both sat silently for a second. I pictured my daughter all grown up: long, dark hair, blue eyes¡ªjust like mine, just like Drake¡¯s¡ªseeking him out and then . . . marrying him. ¡°That is so gross, Drake! You¡¯re her uncle.¡±Advertisement ¡°Separated by generations of genetic interference.¡± ¡°It doesn¡¯t matter. It¡¯s disgusting, and you are so not ever getting anywhere near her.¡± He closed his eyes slowly, breathing out long through his nose. ¡°My dear, sweet niece. I did not come here to argue or negotiate. You are bound by law to have this child, and she will one day know me. There is nothing you can do to stop this.¡± ¡°I can take her away, far away, so she¡¯ll¡ª¡± ¡°If you do that, you will be signing your own death warrant.¡± I stopped mid-sentence and frowned at him. ¡°How so?¡± With an impatient groan, he drew something from his belt and laid it on the table beside the shimmering emerald. ¡°What is that?¡± It looked just like the Dagger of Yahanna. ¡°It¡¯s the dagger you¡¯ve all been driving yourselves crazy over these last few months.¡± ¡°But that¡¯s¡ª¡± He knocked my hand away as I reached to grab it. ¡°In the weapons room. I know. Well, at least . . . it was.¡± ¡°How did you get that?¡± ¡°Well, without the astonishing talents of Jason Knight, it would still be in Arthur¡¯s possession.¡± He winked at me. ¡°You two practically gift-wrapped it for me.¡± I silently cursed my own so-called brilliant plan. ¡°I have not been brave enough to attempt stealing it right from under Arthur¡¯s nose, and I must say, I too believed he had, in fact, forged an imitation,¡± he said, sitting back, slowly drawing his hand away from the dagger and just leaving it right there on the table in front of me, with nothing to stop me jamming it through his heart. ¡°Go ahead,¡± he offered. ¡°Pick it up. Jam it through my heart. It won¡¯t kill me.¡± ¡°Why not?¡± I said through my teeth. ¡°Because I fabricated a purpose for this dagger in the hopes that some vengeful vampire, one day, would return it to me.¡± ¡°Or try to kill you with it.¡± ¡°Precisely. At which point I¡¯d take it from them.¡± ¡°Not if they got it in your heart first.¡± ¡°Did you miss the part where I said I made up that entire story? Parchment and all.¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°The very notion that this dagger severs the connection of an immortal soul from this realm of life is ludicrous. It does nothing of the sort.¡± ¡°Why would you make up a story like that?¡± ¡°Because the dagger had been stolen by a woman I trusted. I needed it back, and the best way to acquire something valuable is by hand-delivery. Unfortunately, I sent Arthur to find it, knowing it was here somewhere, but¡ª¡± he sighed, looking down wistfully at the table, ¡°¡ªit seems even my oldest and most trusted friend fell victim to the appeal of my death.¡± ¡°So. . .¡± I aimed my thumb at the dagger, its shimmering jewels looking suddenly dull as all hope faded from its blade. ¡°It won¡¯t kill you?¡± ¡°Not even when steered by the hand of a king.¡± He laughed. ¡°But it is very important to me.¡± ¡°How so?¡± He picked it up, considering the handle. ¡°Inside this hilt is a very vital piece of a puzzle¡ªone that is key to finalising the terms of the contract with my sister. Once you give birth and the child is safe, I will uphold my end of the agreement.¡± ¡°Which is?¡± ¡°To resurrect Lilith.¡± ¡°What?¡± I sat forward excitedly. ¡°You can bring her back?¡± He nodded once, laying the dagger down again. ¡°And the dagger is the key?¡± ¡°It is.¡± ¡°Wow. So, that¡¯s what you agreed to restore in the contract: Lilith?¡± ¡°It is.¡± I sat back in my chair, shaking my head at the dagger. ¡°So much trouble was caused over that damn thing.¡± He laughed. ¡°Yes, I heard you even went as far as to give yourself to the king¡¯s brother.¡± I made a weird, awkward kind of face. ¡°Yeah, I kinda did.¡± ¡°Ha-ha-ha!¡± He patted my hand. ¡°Oh, Lili, not much about you has changed after all these centuries.¡± My tongue dried up a little, stuck on a word. ¡°Did you just call me . . . Lili?¡± ¡°Yes,¡± he said, holding the same loving smile I¡¯d seen in the glass mural on my ceiling. ¡°That is your name or, at least . . . was.¡± ¡°I. . .¡± Gravity sunk my shoulders. ¡°I don¡¯t really understand.¡± ¡°My little sister, bless her heart, gave up her soul to see Anandene reborn. We needed a pure womb to grow the child¡ªone not marred or tainted by any man before. But Lili had had several children by this time, so we created a curse or, rather, a spell that would see her bear only females¡ªsoulless females, since our contract, and my Anandene, was bound to Lili¡¯s soul. When the child was born, Lilith¡¯s soul was placed into the vessel and, sixteen years later, bred with noble blood to give rise to Anandene.¡± ¡°Okay, whoa, hang on. So, you had to wait sixteen years?¡± ¡°Powerful spells take time.¡± ¡°But, what happened? If you had Anandene back then. . .¡± ¡°Well, we were ignorant. We thought that a man of noble title would suffice. But gods do not care for the importance man places on himself. The child needed to be of true noble blood. So, another soulless child was born in place of what was supposed to be Anandene, and we moved Lilith¡¯s soul to the new vessel.¡± ¡°And then what happened?¡± ¡°In the sixteen more years we had to wait, a close friend of mine devised a cleansing ritual¡ªto see a male born of such pure and noble blood that none other would compare.¡± ¡°What kind of. . .¡± I swallowed, ¡°ritual?¡± ¡°I was sent to trace bloodlines back to the days of Christ¡ªfind one that had been noble of title and ordainment as far back as possible. Safia would give a potion to the wife of this man, and his bloodline would, from that day forth, bare only sons that would bear only sons, and so on and so on, until two sons were born to one mother. One, the purest and noblest child man had ever known, and the other¡ª¡± ¡°All the bad things in one little boy.¡± I nodded, sitting back in my chair, my eyes glazed and lost on the day. ¡°So this noble knight, it was¡ª¡± ¡°Arthur¡¯s bloodline. But, since he never fathered a child, I was forced to use his brother¡¯s descendants.¡± ¡°And that¡¯s why you let him watch over them all these years?¡± ¡°No. I let him protect and keep them safe because it was a promise he made to his dying brother. However, that fact did work to my advantage.¡± ¡°Does . . . does Arthur know?¡± ¡°I¡¯ve suspected for some time. But I¡¯m not sure he knows the full story. He knows enough to draw conclusions¡ªenough to have told David¡¯s mother she would bring an evil child into the world, but¡ª¡± ¡°So Arthur started that story?¡± ¡°Yes, and I know he feels great regret for that.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because, when Thomas Knight learned of it, he cast the demon child out, treated him poorly, as if the boy would bring Hell rising to the earth.¡± ¡°Won¡¯t he?¡± ¡°No.¡± Drake laughed. ¡°He¡¯s not evil. Just impure¡ªeverything undesirable filtered out of mankind. Seven deadly sins, you might say: greed, lust, all that stuff. But even creatures such as this are given the gift of free will. And I believe Jason has chosen the path of light and good, has he not?¡± I smiled, thinking about him. ¡°Yes. He has.¡± ¡°And you¡¯re proud of him?¡± he asked, but it was more of a statement. ¡°I am.¡± ¡°Then, let me ask you something.¡± He waited until I looked at him. ¡°How would you feel to know that your actions cost him his life?¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°I mean, if you, say . . . chose to steal my child away, I couldn''t vouch for the safety and freedom of your people, Amara. How would it feel to know that, just to keep this child from coming to me, you¡¯d sacrificed all those lives¡ªincluding your beloved Jason?¡± ¡°Are you threatening me?¡± ¡°Merely outlining the options.¡± He picked up the dagger again and slipped it into its leather strap. ¡°You cannot save yourself, but you can secure the freedom and eternal safety of your people¡ªfriends and family included.¡± ¡°What do you mean by I cannot save myself?¡± ¡°Oh, you didn¡¯t catch on?¡± he asked, scooping up Anandene¡¯s emerald. ¡°You¡¯re the re-manifestation of my sister¡¯s soul¡ªinserted into one baby after another until the Knight twins were born. God knows, we had no way of knowing it would take centuries, but all¡¯s well that ends well.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t see what that has to do with my death.¡± ¡°The contract, my dear. When the child is born, I am bound by my word to resurrect Lilith. Her body will be pieced back together, and her soul¡ª¡± ¡°Will leave my body.¡± I went numb right through, sitting back so slowly I almost couldn''t feel the back of the chair. ¡°I¡¯ll die?¡± ¡°Yes. But you have. . .¡± he considered my belly, ¡°¡ªseven months to get your affairs in order. No pun intended.¡± He laughed. I looked up at him. ¡°But that isn¡¯t fair.¡± He stopped laughing. ¡°Do not get me started on fair, my dear. How fair is that every time I¡¯ve come close to achieving my goal, something or someone has gotten in my way? I had to wait centuries for the Pure Knight to be born, not knowing when he would come, and on that day, the Lilithian descendant was missing. You would have conceived her on your wedding night had my Warriors not been so good at their job. You would never have even been born had my father not kidnapped the original child.¡± He slammed his fist on the table. ¡°I searched for you for over thirty years, only for my Warriors to find the infant, Amara, and bring her to be killed. And I thought it would be over. David bonded with her, chose to leave her alive, and he goddamn well lost her before I could get her back.¡± ¡°Ha!¡± I sat back, smiling at nothing. ¡°Sucked in.¡± ¡°The next time I found her,¡± he continued as if I hadn¡¯t spoken, ¡°she was being born to a sixteen year old Rose! Do not talk to me about unfair, because I have had more than my fair amount of unfair.¡± ¡°So that¡¯s why you made Arthur turn the boys¡ª¡± ¡°Turn David, yes. I cared not what he did with the other one. But I needed David immortal in case I found the bloodline of my sister a century later.¡± Page 69 ¡°And you found me?¡±Advertisement ¡°Nineteen years ago, yes. But, this time, I chose not to let my father know I knew where you were¡ªjust watched from afar. And I saw to it that both you and David ended up in the same place at the same time.¡± ¡°That¡¯s why you told David to go to school.¡± ¡°Yes, and had you agreed to spend the summer at your father¡¯s that year, I would not have had to place you in his custody. But I was not going to let a moody, spoiled teenager get in the way of my success.¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± He eyed me mockingly. ¡°Did you really think your mother¡¯s death was an accident?¡± I coughed out, folding over, hearing his explanation run through me but pass nowhere near my ears. ¡°You killed her?¡± ¡°You might say I shifted the pieces on the board in my favour.¡± ¡°This isn¡¯t a game, Drake!¡± I got to my feet, shaking. ¡°These are peoples¡¯ lives.¡± ¡°And many have been lost!¡± He stood too. ¡°None more heartbreaking than my wife. I will kill thousands more, Amara,¡± he said, his teeth like a cage. ¡°Thousands, to see her safe and in my arms again. Do not test my resolve.¡± I sat back down again, tears streaming my cheeks, pooling and dripping under my chin. ¡°What will happen to my baby if you take me away from her when she¡¯s born?¡± Drake sat slowly. ¡°She will be raised by her father, who will know nothing of what I¡¯ve told you here today.¡± My eyes flicked onto his. ¡°Why?¡± ¡°I¡¯ve gone to great lengths to protect this one truth all these centuries, Amara, twisting and reshaping the stories until no one remembered anything about a contract. If anyone were to find out, they would use Anandene against me¡ªpossibly kill her.¡± I gasped. ¡°It serves you well not to tell a soul, because you will be putting your own daughter in great danger.¡± I looked down at my hands on my belly, drawing my top up just a little to see the way the sunlight made my hands so golden against my pale white stomach. ¡°She needs a mother.¡± ¡°She will have Lilith in her life.¡± ¡°But that¡¯s not her mother.¡± ¡°And what would you have me do? Break the agreement I made with my sister?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°I can¡¯t do that,¡± he started. ¡°Then don¡¯t break it. Just. . .¡± I thought hard, trying to find some medium ground. ¡°Give me time. Give Lilith back her soul, but let me keep it¡ªjust until the child is old enough to cope without a mother.¡± ¡°How old?¡± I looked down at the belly again. ¡°Eighteen. Maybe.¡± ¡°Eighteen?¡± He nearly leaped out of his seat. ¡°You want me to delay my promise to my sister for eighteen years?¡± ¡°It¡¯s in the child¡¯s best interests, Drake. She can¡¯t grow up without a mother. She¡¯ll never feel complete.¡± ¡°She has a mother. Safia is her mother.¡± My head rolled forward, my jaw nearly touching my chest. ¡°The witch is Anandene¡¯s mother?¡± ¡°Why do you think she¡¯s helped me all these years?¡± I wanted to throw my hands up and shake my head. Nothing surprised me anymore. ¡°Well, the baby won¡¯t know that until she gets her memories back. She needs her birth mother until then.¡± ¡°Very well,¡± he said with a nod. ¡°I will give you eighteen years with the child, but you must let me see her in that time. She must know me.¡± I rolled my eyes. ¡°Fine. But, once I¡¯m gone, David stays on the throne, and everyone I love remains free and unharmed.¡± He laid a hand to his heart. ¡°I give you my word.¡± ¡°Including Arthur.¡± His smile changed. ¡°I will not promise him immunity. He betrayed me, Amara, he must pay.¡± ¡°Then the deal¡¯s off.¡± I folded my arms and sat back. ¡°Very well.¡± He stood. ¡°Send word when the child is born and, the next time we meet, you will be my sister once more.¡± He bowed and turned on his heel, walking away. Just leaving it at that. ¡°Okay. Wait.¡± I jumped up and ran after him, grabbing the edge of his cloak. ¡°Just . . . what do you want with Arthur? You won¡¯t hurt him, will you?¡± He smiled and cupped my shoulder. ¡°Sweet niece, you must never ask me such things¡ªfor your own good. I do not wish to upset you and, in turn, upset the baby. I will come for Arthur soon, and you can either take our previous agreement, or you can die the day your child is born.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± I stepped back, nodding. ¡°I¡¯ll take the agreement.¡± ¡°A wise choice.¡± He leaned over and kissed my brow. ¡°Take care, Amara. You will hear from me soon.¡± ¡°Drake?¡± I called. He stopped and turned to face me. ¡°Can I ask you something else?¡± ¡°Anything.¡± ¡°Where¡¯s Vampirie? You said he stole the child, endlessly ruined your plans. How do we know he won¡¯t try to kill the baby now I¡¯m carrying it?¡± He moved toward me again, graceful as water over sand, and slid his knuckles softly down my cheek. ¡°Because he loves you. He would never do anything to hurt you.¡± ¡°He loves me?¡± ¡°He does.¡± ¡°Well, who is he? I mean, do I know him?¡± ¡°He will reveal himself in time.¡± He turned away. ¡°But do not fear for the child, unless you share anything we¡¯ve talked about here today.¡± ¡°I won¡¯t. But . . . can I at least tell David he doesn¡¯t have to die?¡± ¡°Of course. Providing you leave out as much detail as possible,¡± he said without turning around, and the wind brushed softly across my cheeks then, blowing dust into my eyes. I rubbed them, blinking rapidly, but when I opened them again, Drake was gone and the buzz of life in the garden had come out of hiding. I stood for a while, listening to it all and, despite knowing my life would end in eighteen years, I felt strangely happy and, for the first time since I met David . . . safe. But I just couldn¡¯t believe David and Jason were a plan all along¡ªthe result of a spell¡ªtwo lives I was never intended to be a part of. Drake said it was unfair and that luck had not befallen him, but it had for me. I was lucky to have been born, and so lucky to have been the one to love David, even if it had all fallen apart. I had a lot to think about right now, yet I shoved it all down and let the single moment of joy that David didn¡¯t have to die consume me, running for the door. Pretty much none of what Drake said was good news, but that one bit was enough to stop me falling to the ground and crying my eyes out right now. ¡°Falcon.¡± I marched toward him quickly, checking the manor entranceway for other ears. ¡°Call a meeting.¡± ¡°Meeting?¡± ¡°Yes, with the private council, but¡ª¡± I grabbed his arm, ¡°¡ªdon¡¯t let Morgaine know.¡± ¡°Why?¡± I checked over my shoulder. ¡°She¡¯s fired.¡± His eyes went wide. ¡°Is this because of¡ª¡± ¡°It¡¯s because I don¡¯t trust her anymore, Falcon. And I don¡¯t have to give a reason.¡± ¡°Of course.¡± He bowed his head. ¡°I¡¯ll organise the meeting for twenty minutes¡¯ time, yeah?¡± ¡°Great. Thanks.¡± Falcon disappeared beyond the archway to the east of the manor, and I stood in the middle of the entranceway with my eyes closed, searching for that feeling¡ªthe little buzz I always got around Jason. And when it tingled deep within me, I sent a thought out. ¡°Jase?¡± The energy changed. ¡°Jase? Meet me in the¡ª¡± ¡°Ara?¡± He grabbed my arm gently, snapping me aware. ¡°What¡¯s wrong?¡± ¡°I need you.¡± ¡°What for? And how did you know how to reach me like that?¡± I shrugged. ¡°I can always feel you, so . . . I just searched for that feeling¡ªaimed my thoughts in that direction.¡± He smiled, his eyes wide with wonder. ¡°You are amazing. Can you do that with anyone else?¡± ¡°Feel them? Yeah. But not call to them.¡± ¡°Wow. Tell me where. . .¡± he looked around, ¡°¡ªtell me where Arthur is right now.¡± I groaned. ¡°Jase, I don¡¯t have time for circus tricks.¡± ¡°Please.¡± He sunk lower into his knees, closing his hands in prayer. ¡°Come on. This is cool.¡± I groaned again, rolling my eyes, and then closed them, picturing Arthur, feeling him. ¡°He¡¯s . . . in his room.¡± ¡°That is amazing.¡± ¡°It can be amazing later.¡± I tugged his sleeve until his thoughtful gaze came back down to earth. ¡°Right now, I want to offer you a job.¡± ¡°Job?¡± ¡°A position on my council just opened up.¡± ¡°What?¡± His tone rose, half with shock, the other half with joy. ¡°I¡¯m just about to fire Morgaine, and I need a new member that I trust implicitly. I couldn¡¯t think of anyone else in the world.¡± ¡°Aw, Ara.¡± He shook his head. ¡°I . . . I can¡¯t, sweet girl. David will¡ª¡± ¡°I¡¯m dividing the councils, now, Jase. David is no longer on this council. Being king doesn''t give him right to advise me¡ªnever has. I gave him a position on my council because I trusted him. But, now, well, he can get his own council, and he has no say over who is on mine.¡± ¡°What did he do to you?¡± he asked, his eyes shrinking. ¡°Nothing. I¡¯m fine. But . . . if you¡¯re on my council, he can¡¯t do anything to you. It gives you protection, gets you off stable duties, and. . .¡± I grinned suggestively. ¡°I get a new room.¡± He nodded, catching on. ¡°Yup. You¡¯ll be right next to me.¡± ¡°I bet that¡¯ll piss David off.¡± I shrugged. ¡°I¡¯m not really sure I care right now, Jase.¡± ¡°He¡¯s being cruel, isn¡¯t he?¡± he asked, sweeping my hair back behind my ear. I nodded, but before I even looked up, my face was against Jason¡¯s shirt, his arms around me tightly. ¡°You need to tell me, Ara. Every time he does or says anything that hurts you, you need to tell me.¡± ¡°There¡¯s no point, Jase. I know he¡¯s hurt and just doing anything he can to make me suffer. It¡¯ll pass.¡± He clicked his tongue. ¡°I¡¯m not so sure about that, sweet girl. He¡¯s¡ª¡± ¡°Ara?¡± Falcon cut in, leaning around the wall. ¡°Council¡¯s in session.¡± ¡°Oh, already?¡± I flipped Jason¡¯s hand over and looked at his watch. ¡°We¡¯ll be there in two minutes.¡± ¡°We?¡± Falcon looked at Jason. Page 70 ¡°Yeah.¡± I thrust my shoulders back. ¡°We.¡±Advertisement ¡°As in. . .?¡± He motioned between Jason and I. ¡°Yes. I just hired Jason.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± He groaned, standing off the wall. ¡°I¡¯ll prepare the others.¡± ¡°Thank you,¡± I called, then smiled up at Jase. ¡°Ready?¡± He slipped his hand into mine. ¡°As long as I¡¯ve got you, I can face anything.¡± ¡°Amara?¡± Arthur called from the top of the stairs, his voice sharp with a sense of urgency. Jase and I stopped walking. ¡°What¡¯s wrong?¡± ¡°Where¡¯s David? ¡°I¡ª¡± I looked around. ¡°I don¡¯t know. Why?¡± ¡°The dagger.¡± He appeared beside me. ¡°It¡¯s gone. I¡¯m afraid he¡¯s¡ª¡± ¡°It¡¯s not gone.¡± Jason said, and we smiled at each other. ¡°Drake took it,¡± I cut in. They both looked at me in shock. ¡°What? Since when?¡± Jase said. ¡°That¡¯s why I was calling the meeting. I wanted to inform my council first that I met with Drake, and¡ª¡± ¡°When?¡± Arthur asked. ¡°Just now. He¡ª¡± ¡°Amara, what were you thinking? He¡ª¡± ¡°It¡¯s all right, Arthur. Everything is fine,¡± I assured him, patting his arm. ¡°And we have a plan.¡± ¡°We?¡± ¡°Drake and I. We came to an agreement.¡± Jason closed his feet, making himself a little taller. ¡°And you¡¯re happy with the terms?¡± I nodded. ¡°As much as I can be, yeah.¡± ¡°And he has the dagger?¡± Arthur asked. ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Amara, how will we¡ª¡± ¡°We can¡¯t kill him, Arthur. That¡¯s not what the dagger does.¡± He stopped the protest short of his lips and just stood there frowning. ¡°What does it do?¡± ¡°We need to talk.¡± ¡°Then you¡¯d better start at the beginning,¡± David said from behind us. I groaned loudly, more annoyed than shocked that he was there, and slowly turned around. ¡°We need to call a House meeting. I¡ª¡± ¡°No, you need to tell me, right now, what you¡¯ve done.¡± He walked coolly over and stood before me like a towering lighthouse with angry green lanterns for eyes. ¡°Well, for one, you don¡¯t have to die now.¡± His mouth came open, his tongue moving to the inside of his cheek. ¡°Where¡¯s the dagger?¡± ¡°Drake has it.¡± David looked at Arthur accusingly. ¡°You gave it to him?¡± ¡°I would do no such thing.¡± ¡°Uncle, the lengths you¡¯ve gone to to keep it from me all this time, I wouldn¡¯t be surprised if you set that meeting up for her and Drake.¡± ¡°He didn¡¯t, okay?¡± I took a step closer, kind of moving between David and Arthur. ¡°I called him on the phone and I arranged the meeting.¡± ¡°Did you know about this?¡± David looked at Jason. ¡°I knew she¡¯d arranged it, but didn¡¯t know it was today.¡± David stepped back and ran his hands through his hair. ¡°So what now? You¡¯re just gonna hand your child over to him and let him rule our people again?¡± ¡°No.¡± ¡°Then what did you agree to, Ara?¡± He reached out and grabbed both my arms; it hurt a little but I was, in a really sick way, just happy he¡¯d touched me again. ¡°I can¡¯t fight the contract, David. We never could. When he told me that the dagger has no use¡ª¡± I said, leaving off the bit about it resurrecting Lilith, ¡°¡ªI was given little choice but to agree to uphold the original deal.¡± ¡°You did what?¡± David yelled. ¡°Ara, how could you be so stupid? Do you realise what you¡¯ve done?¡± ¡°Yes. I made an agreement to keep our monarchy safe for eternity, David.¡± ¡°In exchange for a living being?¡± ¡°Not entirely.¡± ¡°And what does that mean?¡± He held out an upturned palm, offering me the floor. ¡°Don¡¯t be cryptic with me, Ara. Get to the point.¡± I blinked a few extra times, trying to keep my cool. ¡°I would get to the point if you¡¯d shut up and let me speak.¡± ¡°Then speak!¡± Grrr. ¡°Instead of Drake coming for my baby when she¡¯s born, raising her in that hell hole, he¡¯s agreed to let me keep her until she¡¯s eighteen.¡± ¡°And what then?¡± David asked sarcastically. ¡°He¡¯s gonna take her away from us?¡± ¡°Us?¡± I said, half laughing with incredulity. ¡°There is no us, David. You said it yourself, she¡¯s not your daughter.¡± Arthur looked at David quickly. ¡°You said that to her?¡± David looked away. ¡°So, he¡¯s gone? Drake? He¡¯s gonna leave us alone until she¡¯s eighteen?¡± ¡°Yes, David, we get eighteen years of safety and. . .¡± ¡°And then we lose our daughter, Ara! Do you think you¡¯ve fixed this? Did you think that by swearing over your own flesh and blood it¡¯d make you a good queen?¡± ¡°No,¡± I said through my teeth, stepping into him with fists tight. ¡°It makes me a great queen, David. Because I am willing to put the safety of my people before my own flesh and blood¡ªas every great leader before me, in the human and the supernatural world has or should do. What does a president do if his daughter is kidnapped and held for ransom?¡± ¡°He does not negotiate!¡± David yelled. ¡°And I did not negotiate, either. I could run. I could take the child away, but our people will die¡ªmy family, my friends, and for what?¡± ¡°For her life.¡± ¡°One life,¡± I yelled. ¡°One life that will likely grow up and seek him out anyway, David.¡± ¡°And why on earth would she do that?¡± ¡°Because she is the reincarnated soul of Anandene.¡± David stumbled back a few steps, staring down at my belly. ¡°No.¡± ¡°Yes,¡± I said. ¡°Don¡¯t you see? I was given a choice to keep my people safe at the expense of myself, and I chose that road. I could not put our blood, our hopes or dreams before my people. And if I had it to do over, I¡¯d do it all the same.¡± He turned away and looked out through the windows above the door. ¡°At least, this way, there is still hope. We can train her to be a fighter. We can spend the next eighteen years searching for a way to kill Drake¡ª¡± ¡°There is no way to kill Drake!¡± He spun around. ¡°He¡¯s a monster. A godforsaken immortal demon, Ara. And you promised him our¡ª¡± He broke then, holding his fist to his mouth. In the silence that lingered, the staff hurried past, busying themselves in the Great Hall, setting up for the ball tonight. We all stood there lost in our own thoughts, trying to find reason among the grey of uncertainty. None of what I¡¯d just told David could go any further than the four of us standing here right now, yet all of it had been exposed in open quarters. I worried then for the concealment of this secret. ¡°You¡¯d have done the same, son,¡± Arthur said, and all eyes turned to him. ¡°You know that.¡± David didn¡¯t say anything. He just looked at me, then back at his uncle, and turned away, walking swiftly off toward the west wing. When he disappeared, finally out of earshot, I lowered my voice and muttered, ¡°It gets worse.¡± ¡°What does?¡± Arthur moved in a step, obviously catching on that whatever I was about to add wasn¡¯t for all ears. ¡°Drake told me that the dagger had been stolen once before¡ª¡± ¡°Yes, many decades ago.¡± ¡°He said it was a woman he trusted¡ªthat she brought it here.¡± ¡°Yes,¡± Arthur said, nodding once, though he didn¡¯t seem to be following me. ¡°Arthur, there is only one girl I can think of that¡¯s linked both to Drake and to the Lilithians.¡± ¡°Morgaine,¡± Jase said. ¡°Yes. And you said she knew about the dagger early on, that she changed the contract and made it look like a prophecy. I think she¡¯s been plotting against us this whole time.¡± ¡°We¡¯ve all had our suspicions about Morgaine at one point, Amara, but we¡¯ve no proof she¡¯s against us¡ªor a motive. She may have taken the dagger to protect you.¡± ¡°Protect me?¡± I scoffed. ¡°From what? The dagger is useless,¡± I lied. ¡°What I want to know is, if she took the dagger from Drake, did she know all along that it wouldn¡¯t kill him? And if she did, why did she let us believe it would? What the hell is she playing at?¡± ¡°Ask her,¡± Jase said simply. ¡°Ask her?¡± I looked all the way up at him. ¡°What, just storm in there and ask her what the deal is?¡± He shrugged. ¡°Why not? I could come with you, read her mind¡ª¡± ¡°No.¡± I touched his arm. ¡°I need to take care of this myself.¡± ¡°Okay.¡± He took a step back, offering the stairs. ¡°I¡¯ll see you at the meeting. Want me to fill everyone in?¡± ¡°Yeah. Thanks.¡± I offered a smile and wandered away, practicing what I¡¯d say to Morgaine in my head. It was time for a little clever leading. ¡°Morgaine?¡± I shoved her door open without knocking, startling her. ¡°My Queen?¡± She dumped her book on the bed and stood up. ¡°What brings you here?¡± ¡°You¡¯re off the council.¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°You heard me. You are officially fired.¡± ¡°Why, Amara?¡± I stepped closer, lowering my voice, though I wanted to shout and scream in her face; she wasn¡¯t proven guilty yet, but my gut was very rarely wrong. ¡°You and I both know why. You¡¯re a liar and a traitor, and while I promised Drake not to expose you,¡± I lied, ¡°that affords you no place in my good graces, nor among a group of people I trust implicitly. You¡¯re the enemy, Morgaine, and I want you out of this manor.¡± ¡°Drake told you?¡± ¡°He told me many things. I know all about the dagger. I know all about the contract, and I know that this child I carry is. . .¡± I paused, hoping she¡¯d fill in the rest. I needed to see just how much she really knew. ¡°Anandene,¡± she said to her feet. ¡°How long have you known? How long have you been aware that David and I would bear the Antichrist?¡± ¡°She won¡¯t be the Antichrist, Amara.¡± She moved closer, dropping her reaching hand when she read the very clear signal I gave off not to touch me. ¡°She¡¯s a pure vessel. She¡¯ll be¡ª¡± ¡°She¡¯ll be fine until her memories return, and then she¡¯ll be an evil witch that¡¯ll seek to marry her own uncle.¡± Page 71 ¡°I know.¡± She tucked a strand of her cherry hair back, shaking her head. ¡°I didn¡¯t want this any more than you, but¡ª¡±Advertisement ¡°So you knew? You forced David and I together so we¡¯d have this child¡ªletting us believe she¡¯d kill Drake¡ªbring peace? Why?¡± A frown crinkled her brow, narrowing her eyes as they moved onto my face. ¡°If you don¡¯t know the answer to that, then Drake didn¡¯t tell you anything about who I am or what I¡¯m doing here. Nice try, Amara.¡± She opened her door. ¡°You can leave now.¡± My hand shot out and slammed the door closed again, holding it in place. ¡°I¡¯m not going anywhere until I get the truth.¡± ¡°The truth?¡± She took a few steps back. ¡°I don¡¯t owe you anything.¡± ¡°That. Is where. You are wrong,¡± I said through my teeth. ¡°You owe me for your safety. Your freedom. And you will either tell me the truth, or I will torture it out of you.¡± ¡°Fine.¡± She stormed off and sat down heavily on her bed. ¡°But you won¡¯t like it. And when you find out what it is, you can¡¯t touch me. You can¡¯t force me to leave, and you cannot tell a soul, because if you do, my uncle will see to it that the dagger is used for its true purpose.¡± The floor fell out from under me. I stood frozen on the spot, clutching my tummy to stop the tightening. ¡°Your uncle?¡± She drew a breath and let it out, averting her eyes. ¡°My name is not Morgaine, Amara. It¡¯s¡ª¡± ¡°Morgana.¡± I exhaled the word, standing there like a fool for a few seconds after as it all sunk in. ¡°I¡¯m not helping Drake because I want him to have a happy ending, Amara,¡± she said, folding her legs up under her on the bed. ¡°I just want my mother back¡ªwant the life back that he took from me.¡± ¡°Took from you? ¡°Yes. Took.¡± ¡°Okay, I¡¯m gonna need you to elaborate, Morgaine.¡± She kind of groaned, rolling her eyes as most people did when I didn¡¯t ¡®catch on¡¯ to the full story immediately, despite not having any of the facts. ¡°From the moment he met Anandene,¡± she began, ¡°all he cared about was being with her. He stopped caring about his little sister, and when he became my guardian, he didn¡¯t even care that I was left without anyone to love me¡ªa small child dumped in a cottage on the outskirts of town until I was twenty-five, with nothing but monthly visits from my uncle to tell me I¡¯d see my mother again when she¡¯d completed her task. I never even got to say goodbye to her.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry, Morgana. That¡¯s. . .¡± I walked over and sat down slowly beside her. ¡°I can¡¯t even imagine how awful that would''ve been.¡± She offered a smile. ¡°My grandmother lived there too. I guess I wasn¡¯t really alone. And she taught me witchcraft and told me stories, but I never saw any other children, never saw the world. Never really knew my mother. Never even knew why she left me.¡± ¡°Drake didn¡¯t tell you?¡± ¡°Not until I was old enough to leave the cottage on my own. By that point, he¡¯d lost the child of my mother¡¯s re-manifested soul, and all hope with it. He told me I¡¯d never see her again but that he could feed me blood¡ªmake me immortal¡ªif I promised to hide my true identity.¡± ¡°So you became Morgaine, a Created Lilithian.¡± ¡°Yes. And I built an army¡ªdestroyed the last page of the contract, and made it look like a prophecy so that, if Drake¡¯s Warriors ever found another Lilithian, my army could ¡°save¡± her and keep her safe, without Drake being implicated and the truth about Anandene coming out.¡± ¡°So, he knew you built the Core?¡± She nodded. ¡°It was his idea.¡± I rubbed my brow. ¡°Why did you need to hide the truth about Anandene so deeply?¡± ¡°Because many would seek to stop it happening¡ªon the belief that bringing things back to life in that manner is the devil¡¯s work, that it¡¯s unnatural and will bring a curse.¡± ¡°Is there any truth in that?¡± ¡°None,¡± she said with a gentle laugh. ¡°But there are so many lies,¡± I said, looking off at nothing, amazed at the depth of it all and how the hell she kept up with it when even I couldn¡¯t. ¡°You¡¯ve clearly had to rearrange the story every time we turned over a new leaf, right¡ªreformat them to make them fit?¡± She nodded. ¡°Why not just tell me the truth in the beginning?¡± ¡°And have you thwart a mission that has taken centuries to complete?¡± ¡°Morg,¡± I said, and waited for her to look at me. ¡°If you told me it would be my life instead of David¡¯s, I¡¯d have signed the dotted line myself. Don¡¯t you know that?¡± Her dark eyes studied mine intently, flowing past them and over the shape of my cheekbones, my lips, and back to my eyes again. ¡°I didn¡¯t know that then. I thought the only way to bribe you into ruling the people and having a baby would be if you could kill Drake. When that wasn¡¯t enough, I had to find your currency.¡± ¡°Currency?¡± She nodded solemnly. ¡°I realised that life was more important to you than death, so I told you about freeing the Damned. And that¡¯s the moment everything changed¡ªwhen you finally snapped out of that trance you¡¯d been in and found the will to fight.¡± ¡°So you used my love and compassion to make me do what you wanted, just so you could have your mother back?¡± ¡°Yes. And I don¡¯t regret it, Amara. I never cared about the safety and freedom of the Lilithians¡ªevery one of them can die for all I care. And, as for the Damned . . . they¡¯re better off dead.¡± My teeth ground tightly in my mouth. I just wanted to hit her. ¡°Why tell David he had to die then? Why make up the lie about the dagger?¡± ¡°I didn¡¯t. That was Drake and Jason¡¯s fault.¡± ¡°How so?¡± ¡°A few centuries after I realised Drake had failed and this child would never be born, I took the dagger as an insurance policy¡ªto put my mother back together. All I needed was the key to her tomb and the child who had her soul. Drake knew I took the dagger and hid it here, but he didn¡¯t know where. He created a parchment that told of the dagger¡¯s power, said that it would kill him, in the hopes someone might try to do just that.¡± ¡°And he¡¯d get it back.¡± ¡°Yeah. He sent Arthur to find it for him so I couldn¡¯t ruin his plans and bring my mother back before the child was born. But Jason found the document and sent it to David anonymously. From then on, everything changed, and it was no longer about using the power of the child to free the Damned and kill Drake. It was suddenly about David being the martyr.¡± I rolled my eyes. ¡°I had to go to great lengths to slow things down,¡± she added. ¡°I made up the bit about the hand of the king needing to drive the dagger to give us time. Otherwise, he¡¯d have left to kill Drake that day, and he wasn¡¯t even planning to say goodbye.¡± ¡°So, I guess I owe you thanks, then?¡± I asked sarcastically. ¡°Well, no, because it wouldn¡¯t have worked. And Drake wouldn¡¯t have killed David. He needed him to make a baby with you.¡± My hands went absently across my belly. ¡°This is all so messed up.¡± ¡°Imagine how I feel then?¡± Her neck jutted forward a bit. ¡°I wasn¡¯t built to lie, Amara. And this whole thing has been one big lie after another. I lost track so many times I don¡¯t how any of you possibly believed me.¡± I laughed, though I wasn¡¯t amused. ¡°You did a pretty good job.¡± ¡°I know.¡± ¡°So, what¡¯s your plan now, Morgana? Are you helping Drake or trying to resurrect Lilith?¡± ¡°Honestly?¡± Her brows rose, prompting my response. ¡°A shred of honesty would be great.¡± ¡°I need the key to her tomb. I have the soul, I know where the dagger is, and all I need is that damn key, and then I¡¯ll free my mother.¡± ¡°And I¡¯ll die.¡± She shrugged dismissively. My shoulders dropped. ¡°Where¡¯s the key then?¡± ¡°I don¡¯t know.¡± Her arms wrapped both her knees. ¡°Drake has one key, which I will never, in a million years, get my hands on. And the other key . . . it was held by the goddess Lilith, my great grandmother.¡± ¡°So. . .where is she now?¡± ¡°Here.¡± She motioned around the place. ¡°She¡¯s the guardian of the earth. You call her Mother Nature.¡± ¡°Oh.¡± My stomach dropped into my feet. I was pretty sure then that I knew exactly where that key was. ¡°And . . . what does the key look like?¡± Morg shrugged again. ¡°All I know is that it¡¯s enchanted¡ªhas a life force of its own. You know it only by the energy it carries¡ªsomething that makes it seem . . . alive.¡± I laid a hand to my chest, right over the key I¡¯d found on my Walk of Faith. Silence hung in the room for a while then, the clock on her dresser keeping the time with a steady tick. ¡°What if you never find the key? Her dark eyes moved onto mine. ¡°Then I go with plan B.¡± ¡°Plan B?¡± ¡°Help Drake get Anandene.¡± ¡°Neither of which will be possible for you now, Morgana,¡± I snapped. ¡°I can¡¯t just let you walk around freely, plotting against us.¡± ¡°You have no choice,¡± she stated. ¡°Actually, I do, and¡ª¡± ¡°And I bet Drake threatened you, forced you to keep everything a secret on pain of death, and I doubt it was your death but, rather, someone you love,¡± she suggested. My nails formed deep impressions on my palms. ¡°You know him well.¡± ¡°I do.¡± She tapped my hands, making me unfold them. ¡°A few centuries alongside one man will do that.¡± ¡°Alongside?¡± I asked, hinting on the rumours I¡¯d heard about her Drake having been . . . together. ¡°Yes. Alongside. But not in the manner your tone suggests, Amara.¡± ¡°I heard you slept with him.¡± ¡°We started that rumour because it was the only convincing reason why he would be so protective of me, you know¡ªallow a Lilithian to walk freely.¡± ¡°So, it¡¯s not true? You never, er¡ª¡± ¡°No.¡± She laughed. ¡°I did spend many nights in his bed, but not for impure reasons. I just . . . I was safe there¡ªwith him.¡± ¡°Safe? Weren''t you safe anywhere in the castle if you were Drake¡¯s girl?¡± Her head moved sideways. ¡°I killed a man once¡ªa vampire.¡± ¡°Killed?¡± I frowned, and then it clicked: she had venom like mine. ¡°I was asleep one night when I heard my door open and then close again. I called out to see who it was, but no one answered. Next thing I know, there¡¯s a man pinning my arms down. I screamed out, tried to fight him off. But no one came. So . . . I bit him. And he died. Uncle Drake had to go to great lengths to cover it up. He hid the body in the floorboards and that¡¯s where it stayed. It¡¯s still there now.¡± Page 72 I rubbed my head. ¡°So you had venom, vampire-killing venom, all this time? And you never helped the Damned, or¡ª¡±Advertisement ¡°I don¡¯t care about the Damned, Amara! If I used my venom to help anyone¡ªif Drake used it to help anyone, it would have given me away. The whole mission could''ve been compromised.¡± ¡°So you let them suffer because you wanted your mom back?¡± Her jaw went tight, eyes small and sharp. ¡°What would you do, Amara, to bring your mother back?¡± ¡°Well, that wouldn¡¯t even be a question if Drake hadn¡¯t killed her!¡± ¡°He¡ª¡± she started, but mashed her lips tightly together and folded her arms like a smug little brat. ¡°It was a means to an end.¡± ¡°A means to an end!¡± I stood up. ¡°A means to an end?¡± She stood, too. ¡°Your life means nothing, Amara. You are a means to an end¡ªall of this is. And as soon as that child is born, none of you will exist.¡± ¡°That¡¯s where you''re wrong,¡± I said smugly. ¡°Drake swore to leave David on the throne, and that all my friends, my family and my people would be safe for eternity. And. . .¡± I paused to build suspense, just enjoying this moment: when she found out what else he promised, it would hurt her just as deeply as it hurt me to know my mother died for this cause. ¡°He promised me eighteen years to raise my child.¡± ¡°What!¡± ¡°You heard me. He has the dagger now, so you won¡¯t be seeing your dead mommy any time soon, Morgana. And, in the meantime, you need to find yourself a new job¡ªand a new home.¡± ¡°You can¡¯t kick me out!¡± I turned toward the door. ¡°I just did.¡± She grabbed my arm and spun me around. ¡°If I leave, people will ask questions. And Drake will just put another spy in place to watch over you.¡± My eyes closed involuntarily around the truth. ¡°Better the devil you know,¡± she added. ¡°Fine.¡± I opened my eyes, hearing the old idiom in my head: keep your enemies close. ¡°Stay. But you¡¯re no longer on my council. Neither is David. And you will move your things out immediately and take them down to Jason¡¯s old room.¡± ¡°Old room?¡± She frowned. ¡°Where¡¯s his new one?¡± I rolled my head slowly higher, smirking. ¡°You¡¯re standing in it.¡± ¡°But¡ª¡± ¡°You have twenty minutes.¡± I turned on my heel and walked from the room, leaving the door open on my way out. Life is never lonelier than when you hide a truth that¡¯s weighing you down. I looked across the dinner table at Falcon, then at Jason, just wishing I could tell someone, anyone what Drake had told me. All my council even knew was that Morgaine had been fired for siding with David too often and that we¡¯d recently discovered the Dagger of Yahanna was useless. I didn¡¯t tell them I¡¯d met with Drake and I didn¡¯t tell them I was the living re-manifestation of the former queen¡¯s soul. I did lie and say Jason might have a toxic potion that could kill an original, and that was the only thing that kept them in their seats when they realised David couldn¡¯t. The people, however, would remain under the impression that the dagger was safe and still as useful as before. With time to think after the meeting today, everything Drake said sunk in bit by bit¡ªpieces I didn¡¯t want to think about rising to the front of my thoughts all afternoon. I wanted to fight¡ªto find some way I could stop him from killing me in eighteen years, but that would mean putting the baby in danger and possibly making Drake angry enough to break our agreement. But it wasn¡¯t just that. I slumped on my hand. He killed my mom and my baby brother, and he did it because I refused to go to my dad¡¯s that year. If I¡¯d just gone¡ªif I¡¯d just stuck to the plans we made every year, they¡¯d still be alive. ¡°Baby?¡± Mike laid his hand over mine. I looked up from my lap and smiled. ¡°You okay?¡± he mimed, not actually speaking. I nodded, rearranging my napkin in my lap. ¡°You look like you¡¯re about to cry.¡± My stupid chin quivered then. I drew a quiet but jagged breath and forced another smile, catching Falcon¡¯s eye when he looked up. He gave me that look¡ªthe one asking what was going on, and when Jason frowned, noticing the exchange then turning his worried eyes on me, I couldn¡¯t help it; a soft breath burst from between my lips, and I sobbed hard at the dinner table, with Mike¡¯s arms suddenly wrapping me, my tears falling onto my plate. ¡°What¡¯s going on?¡± David stood and threw his napkin down. ¡°Uh, just . . . pregnancy hormones,¡± Emily said casually, running over with her arms flailing about in the air. A few people laughed affectionately, and I was swept out of the room, not really knowing whose hands were guiding me. ¡°I don¡¯t know,¡± Mike said, answering some question I hadn¡¯t heard. ¡°I asked her what¡¯s wrong, and she just. . .¡± ¡°Mike, don¡¯t you know? Never ask someone what¡¯s wrong if they look they¡¯re about to cry,¡± Emily said, sliding her arm around me. ¡°Ara? What happened? Did David¡ª¡± ¡°No.¡± I moved away from her. ¡°David didn¡¯t do anything. I . . . I just needed some air.¡± She looked at Mike, and he threw his hands up, backing away. ¡°Girl stuff. Got ya. I¡¯ll leave you to it.¡± I wanted to grab him and ask him to stay¡ªwanted to tell him that the woman he grew up with beside me died for no good reason. It wasn''t an act of God or Fate. It was murder. Senseless murder. But he would, at the very least, cause a scene over it. No one would understand my anger and agony better than him. But I just couldn''t trust him to stay calm if he knew. So, I let him walk away, Em and I smiling as he gave some obviously hilarious explanation to smooth things over back in the Great Hall. David made a smart remark that I didn¡¯t hear, but I also didn¡¯t care what he said about me. ¡°Ara.¡± Falcon turned me to face him, closing Emily out of the circle. ¡°What happened?¡± ¡°I can¡¯t talk about it.¡± He frowned at me, his hands going tighter on my arms for a second, his eyes narrowing in question, slightly flicking on to Emily. I shook my head. She wasn¡¯t the reason I couldn¡¯t talk. ¡°Ara,¡± he said, ¡°You know you can trust me with anything, even if it was something you weren''t allowed to tell anyone.¡± ¡°Can I trust you not to do anything about it, to act as if I never told you?¡± He went to say something, closing his mouth with a little pop after, his shoulders sinking. ¡°Yes. If it¡¯s just an ear you need, of course.¡± I turned and glanced back at Emily. ¡°Thanks, Em. I¡¯ll be okay.¡± ¡°I get it.¡± She reversed away. ¡°Not for my ears.¡± ¡°It¡¯s for your own protection.¡± ¡°More like so I won¡¯t tell David.¡± ¡°No, Em,¡± I started, but she disappeared. ¡°Forget it, Ara. If that¡¯s the attitude she has, she¡¯s better off outside the circle of trust.¡± I nodded. ¡°She¡¯s just got her nose out of joint.¡± ¡°Yes, well, she¡¯s also still very close to David. Anything you don¡¯t want him to know, you probably shouldn''t tell her.¡± ¡°She¡¯d never say anything to him.¡± ¡°No, but he can read her mind.¡± ¡°Yes.¡± I looked at my shoes. ¡°I really hate that ¡®special connection¡¯ they have.¡± Falcon laughed through his nose. ¡°It¡¯s pretty odd. Drives Blade crazy, too.¡± ¡°Has he told her, yet¡ªthat he¡¯s. . .¡± ¡°No,¡± he said, his lips staying in the shape of the O for a bit too long. ¡°And you¡¯d better not say anything, either.¡± I crossed my heart. ¡°I won¡¯t.¡± ¡°Good. Now¡ª¡± He laid his hand firmly on my shoulder, almost like a gentle slap. ¡°What¡¯s got you so upset?¡± I looked back into the Great Hall. ¡°Not here. Okay?¡± ¡°Okay. Bedroom.¡± We walked in silence up to my room and, once there, Falcon barely even shut the door before I broke down and told him the whole story¡ªeverything I needed off my chest and everything I wasn¡¯t allowed to tell him, even about Morgana. I let it all pour out. And he just stood there while I paced back and forth, holding as still as a statue until I finished and looked at him, tears streaming down my cheeks and said, ¡°So? What do I do?¡± ¡°I¡ª¡± He stumbled clumsily backward and sat down on my blanket box, rubbing the tops of his thighs. ¡°Ara, I¡¯m so sorry. I don¡¯t know where to start.¡± I wiped my face, just waiting for a word of wisdom or maybe even comfort. ¡°Have you told David any of this?¡± ¡°No.¡± ¡°And you won¡¯t?¡± ¡°No.¡± ¡°Mike?¡± I laughed. ¡°God, no.¡± He laughed, too, then stood up and wandered over, drawing me in for a very needed hug. His big hand squeezed my hair flat to the back of my neck while the other rubbed my back, just leaving everything unsaid for a few moments. ¡°You poor kid.¡± I sunk into him a bit more then, drying the corner of my eye on his shirt. ¡°I just . . . I¡¯m so sorry he killed your mom.¡± ¡°Me too.¡± ¡°But. . .¡± He looked down at me, leaving his hand on the side of my neck. ¡°You know that¡¯s not your fault, right?¡± ¡°But I¡ª¡± ¡°No.¡± His grip tightened. ¡°Drake chose to kill her. Drake lost Anandene and he created a contract, and everything he has done in pursuit of that is on his head, Ara, not yours. You did not do this.¡± ¡°I want to believe that, but if I¡¯d never¡ª¡± ¡°Then believe it. Because if I thought you were to blame, I¡¯d tell you that, counsel you on that. But you¡¯re not. No matter how much you convince yourself, Ara, you didn¡¯t kill her. You were a spoiled teenage brat, but that wasn¡¯t the reason she died. Drake was the reason.¡± ¡°Yeah, to force me into Dad¡¯s custody.¡± He shook his head. ¡°Stop trying to lay blame where it won¡¯t fit.¡± I stared at the floor, reversing the situation in my head. What would I say to him if this were his problem? ¡°You¡¯re right. You are. I know you are. The fact is, Drake ordered her death, like she was some pawn. And he needs to pay.¡± ¡°Yes, he does.¡± ¡°I¡¯m gonna kill him. I¡¯m gonna go over there right now, and I¡¯m¡ª¡± ¡°Whoa, whoa, whoa, little lady. Let¡¯s not go that far just yet.¡± He steadied me with a stop-sign hand. ¡°Control those crazy pregnancy hormones.¡± He laughed, making me laugh a bit, too. ¡°You have nothing to back you here. If you go against him, he¡¯ll take your soul and give it back to Lilith. He has the dagger, remember.¡± Page 73 ¡°So, what am I supposed to do?¡± I shrugged, hands out. ¡°Just let him get away with this?¡±Advertisement ¡°No. But don¡¯t go rushing in there waving the sword of revenge,¡± he said. ¡°We have eighteen years to devise a plan. Let¡¯s be smart about this.¡± ¡°But,¡± I started, then stopped, shaking my head. He was right again. ¡°See?¡± I pouted mockingly, bringing one shoulder up. ¡°This is why I always come to you. You¡¯re good at this.¡± He grinned. ¡°No, I¡¯m good at Ara-Control.¡± I laughed. ¡°So, any ideas on how we can get revenge?¡± ¡°Yeah, wait until little bubba is born.¡± He touched my belly. ¡°And then we¡¯ll discuss it. But I want her safe and alive before we do anything that might put you or your soul at risk.¡± ¡°You mean Lilith¡¯s soul,¡± I said spitefully. ¡°No.¡± He grabbed both my shoulders again. ¡°Your soul. She gave it to you¡ªwell, your mother gave it to you. Possession is nine-tenths of the law, don¡¯t you know?¡± He grinned. ¡°Yeah, but right now I¡¯m possessed by a raw need for vengeance.¡± He laughed, throwing his head back a bit, and the tension in the room eased so much then. Even my own need to cry had lifted, the weight a little less overbearing, especially since I knew that pathetic attempt at a joke wasn¡¯t even funny. ¡°We¡¯ll sort this out, m¡¯kay?¡± He looked me in the eye, lowering his chin a little to prompt a response. ¡°Yeah. Okay. Thanks, Falcon.¡± ¡°Any time.¡± He stood back again. ¡°And what about Morgana? What are you doing with her?¡± ¡°Keeping an eye on her. That¡¯s all I can do.¡± He nodded in agreement, taking a really deep, shoulder-lifting breath. ¡°What a mess.¡± ¡°You¡¯re telling me.¡± We both laughed then, more to blow out the tension than because of amusement. And Falcon just smiled, standing tall again like the knight I¡¯d come to respect so much, his expression alight with a mix of compassion and something else I didn¡¯t recognise. ¡°You might want to consider telling David some of what you told me.¡± ¡°Which bit?¡± ¡°The bit about your mom.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because he should know.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because it¡¯s devastating, Ara. I know he¡¯s been a prick to you since this Jason thing came out, and I really don¡¯t think you, or your baby¡ª¡± he presented us, ¡°¡ªneed him treating you that way. If he knew the grief you were suffering right now, I think he¡¯d back off a bit.¡± I shook my head at the ground. ¡°He won¡¯t let me speak to him long enough to tell him something like that.¡± ¡°Want me to tell him?¡± For a moment, I considered it, considered the reaction David would have. But something told me it wouldn¡¯t be compassion. He wouldn¡¯t back off if he knew the truth. This horrid David that¡¯d taken over the man I loved would probably use it to hurt me. ¡°Nah,¡± I said, meeting his eye. ¡°Leave it to me. I¡¯ll tell him when the time is right.¡± ¡°Okay. If you¡¯re sure?¡± I nodded. ¡°If I change my mind, I know where to find you.¡± He placed a hand to his chest and bowed. ¡°Always at your side, My Queen.¡± Chapter Fourteen ¡°This ball will be the same as every other formal event,¡± Falcon advised. ¡°David will escort you from the second floor into the ballroom and, once there, you¡¯ll engage in the first dance of the evening. After a few turns on the dance floor, the guests will be asked to join you.¡± I nodded, repositioning my crown where it slipped a little toward my brow. Magda had designed my dress around this gold headpiece, combining the style with the pale colour scheme of the ¡®Winter Falls¡¯ decorations in the ballroom, creating a final product that was worthy of Elizabeth I, Queen of England. Fine gold weaving ran in two lines down the front panel of the dress, like woven glitter, while the silky cream fabric caught the light just so, showing the delicate floral pattern within. The dress had come together nicely, mentioned in the Lilithian Times as, ¡°A gold and cream Victorian gown with a modern Amarian edge to it.¡± It looked like a ball gown one would¡¯ve worn with a high grey coiffure in the eighteenth century, but instead of long sleeves and a puffy bottom, we¡¯d removed the sleeve all together, making it strapless, falling from the waist in a smaller, more elegant puff. My tiny belly was hidden completely under the drop of the skirt, and my hair had been tied up and stacked high on my head, with curls dangling softly around my face. The only thing I hated was the horrid gold heel they¡¯d put me in to account for both David¡¯s height and the length of the dress. I wasn¡¯t sure I could walk in the shoes, let alone dance. ¡°What are you worrying about, Ara?¡± Falcon asked. ¡°Oh, nothing.¡± I forced a smile, noticing suddenly that he¡¯d been studying my face. ¡°I¡¯m okay.¡± He drew his hands from behind his back and placed one around me. ¡°You look a bit pale.¡± ¡°I¡¯m just nervous.¡± ¡°About what?¡± I checked over my shoulder then off to both sides, making sure David wasn¡¯t around. ¡°Dancing with the king.¡± Falcon didn¡¯t say anything to that. He just exhaled loudly, directing his attention to the crack between the slightly open doors to the Great Hall, where, from up here on the second floor landing, we could both watch the scene beyond. Hundreds of people, by invitation only, had gathered to celebrate the miracle of life. Round tables decked in white cloths occupied the left side of the room, the giant picture of Lilith overlooking, while the right of the room, just by the piano, had been left open as a dance floor. Couples waltzed around the space, all smiling and radiant, with the candlelight echoing warm sentiments around them, charming the pale-coloured clothing like strings of gold. I couldn¡¯t see Jason anywhere in there. He had the right to be there now that he was on my council, though, but I hadn¡¯t spoken to David yet¡ªhadn¡¯t been told what his reaction was, and wasn¡¯t sure if he was going to willingly stand by and allow it, or if he might think to stop it by any means necessary. Including by locking Jason up for tonight. ¡°Thank you, Falcon,¡± David said dismissively, stepping up out of nowhere. ¡°We¡¯ll see you inside.¡± Falcon glanced back at David, and lowered his head to mine, keeping his arm around me. ¡°You be okay?¡± I nodded. ¡°I¡¯ll be on the dance floor, right below you. Just whisper my name if you need me,¡± he hinted. I nodded again, my chest too full of air to speak. ¡°I said, I¡¯ll take it from here,¡± David reiterated. ¡°Good luck, Ara.¡± Falcon moved back as the king stood between us. ¡°And be careful on the stairs in those shoes.¡± ¡°I will.¡± I smiled softly at him. ¡°Stop worrying, Falcon. Go enjoy yourself. I¡¯ll be fine, I swear.¡± He exhaled, trying to smile, but he didn¡¯t like leaving me up here, alone, with David. Especially since the amendment of the marital laws hadn¡¯t been passed through the Upper House yet. ¡°Amendment, or not,¡± David said to Falcon. ¡°I would never do anything to physically hurt the girl.¡± Falcon bowed once and trotted down the entranceway stairs behind us. ¡°Are you ready?¡± David asked, slipping a white glove onto his hand. ¡°Yup.¡± ¡°Right. Then let¡¯s get this over with.¡± He walked forward, not even offering his arm, and the doors swung open, the footmen on the other side bowing their heads as we entered the room. The flow of dancing stopped below like a swirl of water ending suddenly, a few still going until they looked over their shoulders at the announcement of the king and the queen. All the pale colours, warmed with the yellow light, made the room look like a painting, something too fantastical to be real. ¡°It¡¯s so beautiful.¡± ¡°Yes,¡± David said, bowing to our guests. ¡°It is.¡± We stood atop the stairs for a moment then, giving them all time to take us in. ¡°David?¡± I said under my breath. ¡°What?¡± ¡°Are you okay?¡± ¡°Why wouldn¡¯t I be?¡± ¡°You don¡¯t condone this,¡± I said simply, touching my belly. ¡°It must be hard for you to celebrate something you despise.¡± David said nothing in return, but even if he did, I wouldn¡¯t have heard, because my attention was swept away from our private conversation to Arthur, sitting behind the piano, tossing out the traditional entrance lullaby and replacing it with a Muse song. ¡°Is he mad?¡± I said excitedly. ¡°I love this song!¡± David frowned down at me. ¡°I didn¡¯t even know you knew it.¡± ¡°Are you kidding? You know how much I love Muse.¡± ¡°Come then. It¡¯s time to enter,¡± he muttered, and took off. I grabbed hold of the railing and placed my wobbly heel to the first step, searching my peripheral for David¡¯s arm in case I needed to grab it. But his hands were behind his back, clearly being kept away from any risk of touching me. ¡°You¡¯ll have to touch me when we¡¯re dancing, you know?¡± I said, hiding my moving lips behind the smile I offered the crowd. ¡°Why do you think I wore gloves?¡± I scoffed in the back of my throat, not meaning to. ¡°You know, you don¡¯t have to be so¡ª¡± ¡°Careful.¡± His hand wrapped my back suddenly; the other one grabbing my arm, hitching me upright again as I nearly flew forward, and the quiet gasp of the crowd forced my eyes onto all the shocked faces below. My heart thundered in my chest, my gaze meeting Falcon¡¯s then, who closed his eyes, clutching his own chest. David lifted my dress angrily, yanking the skirt out from under the toe of my shoe. ¡°This dress is too long.¡± ¡°It¡¯s supposed to be.¡± ¡°You need to lift it at the front when you walk, Ara. Didn¡¯t anyone teach you that?¡± ¡°We¡ª¡± He grabbed a handful of fabric and stuffed it in my hand, closing my fingers around it. ¡°Walk carefully. I will not catch you again.¡± ¡°You wouldn''t have anyway, were it not for all these people watching.¡± He looked over the room, resuming his kingly posture, and started walking. I followed, this time holding my dress above my shoes. And we entered the ball with a bit more grace than we¡¯d started with, David offering his hand on the last step and drawing me finally close to him as we fluttered like a breeze onto the dance floor. He positioned our arms widely, with absolutely perfect form, and I caught a glimpse of us in the giant glass windows overlooking the gardens: a man in a suit of black and white, his not-so-beloved queen standing a few inches shorter than him¡ªtheir backs so straight, their steps so swift and graceful, the whole scene like something from a fairy-tale. He looked nice in a suit, his kingly sash across his chest, distinguishing him from the rest of the men in the room, and I felt proud to be in his arms and also sad, because I knew this would be the last time. Page 74 The other guests joined the dance floor then, David and I stepping in smaller circles to make room for them, changing our stride so effortlessly one would think we¡¯d danced together for centuries.Advertisement I looked up at his face to take him in; he was clean-shaven, his dark hair brushed back, tidy and almost too clean. But the coldness in his eyes made the green stand out more, and I couldn¡¯t help but smile as he looked down at me. ¡°What was that look for?¡± I asked, noticing a very coy kind of almost smile on his face, too. His hand moved slightly more around my rib. ¡°You¡¯ve filled out since I last held . . . since we last danced.¡± My smile dropped. ¡°I know.¡± ¡°I warned you about those brownies.¡± ¡°Magda says I¡¯m not fat¡ªthat it¡¯s just a part of being pregnant, you know, that you lose your child¡¯s figure and become more of a woman.¡± ¡°Being pregnant does not make you more of a woman, Ara. That¡¯s done by your actions alone.¡± ¡°Yes, but, she meant that the body changed¡ªbecame more womanly.¡± ¡°And since when is Magda the expert?¡± ¡°She¡¯s not. I guess.¡± I lowered my gaze onto David¡¯s white bowtie. ¡°How much longer is this dance?¡± ¡°It¡¯s been too long already.¡± He stiffened just a little, angling his chin so it sat further away from the top of my head. But his eyes kept drifting downward, brushing over my face, my hair, my gown. My smile returned. ¡°You know, I can read your mind.¡± ¡°I highly doubt that.¡± ¡°No, I can. And you won¡¯t say it, but you think I look pretty tonight.¡± He stared down at me, his face suddenly devoid of all emotion. ¡°I think no such thing. I barely even noticed you.¡± ¡°Okay. I get it. I know you hate me, but you don¡¯t have to be so mean.¡± ¡°It was not my intention to be mean, Ara. Simply to state that you¡¯re fooled if you think you enter even one of my thoughts in a day¡ªparticularly when it comes to my opinion of your appearance. Quite frankly, if I¡¯m honest, cream makes you look washed-out, and your head looks too big for your body when you do your hair that way.¡± That hurt. Deeply. But I brushed it off, flicked him a quirky grin and said, ¡°I thought you said you didn¡¯t really notice me.¡± ¡°Just dance, girl. Or this will end with you tripping and accidentally snapping your ankle¡ªrendering you useless for the evening.¡± I shut my gob then and just danced, letting out the breath I¡¯d held when the song finally ended and Mike stepped up to take over. ¡°May I?¡± he said with a bow. I grabbed his arm and practically ran away with him. ¡°You okay, baby?¡± ¡°He threatened to snap my leg,¡± I whispered, leaning close. Mike laughed, turning to face me. ¡°Why?¡± ¡°He wanted me to shut up.¡± ¡°Did it work? Did you shut up?¡± I nodded, glancing back at David; he was holding Emily close now, the girl throwing her head back, laughing at something he whispered into her hair. ¡°Well, I¡¯ll have to remember that one,¡± Mike said playfully. ¡°Don¡¯t you start.¡± He just laughed again. ¡°You know he wouldn''t actually do that, Ara, right?¡± I felt myself shrink a little. ¡°I¡¯m not really so sure about that.¡± ¡°Aw, Ar.¡± Mike dropped my hand from position and wrapped me up in a very informal hug. ¡°If he does anything to hurt you or upset you, you come tell me.¡± ¡°Why? What can you do about it?¡± ¡°We¡¯re still buddies. I¡¯ll talk to him.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t. Otherwise he¡¯ll think I¡¯ve been complaining about him.¡± ¡°So?¡± ¡°So, then he¡¯ll just make life harder.¡± ¡°Harder?¡± He raised a brow. ¡°What¡¯s he doing to make it hard now? You two are never even in the same room.¡± I wanted to roll my eyes. ¡°Nothing. It doesn¡¯t matter.¡± ¡°No, it does matter.¡± His voice peaked higher on the end. ¡°What¡¯s going on, Ara?¡± A few guests passed us and offered congratulations on the baby, Mike and I taking a moment from our conversation to humour them, and as they danced away again, the music stopped suddenly, Mike looking off to his right when a man tapped his shoulder. ¡°May I?¡± Jason asked, stepping into view. ¡°You may.¡± Mike laid my hand in Jason¡¯s, patting his shoulder. ¡°Just return her in one piece this time, mate¡ªunlike the last ball.¡± Jason stiffened, catching my eye quickly. ¡°I¡ª¡± ¡°He was just joking, Jase.¡± I smiled, watching Mike blend in with the crowd. ¡°It wasn¡¯t funny,¡± he said, taking me up in his arms like I was some precious stone. ¡°I think he¡¯s just trying to show us that he¡¯s passed all that now.¡± ¡°No, he¡¯s not. He¡¯s just holding it together for you tonight.¡± I nodded, feeling my crown brush Jason¡¯s jaw. ¡°How did the meeting go today¡ªbefore I got there? Were they nice?¡± ¡°Surprisingly?¡± he said, pausing for a second. ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Was Mike?¡± ¡°He was quiet, but I think he knew there was no point arguing my position.¡± ¡°Good. I¡¯m sure he¡¯ll have something to say about it in private, but I¡¯m ready for him.¡± Jase shook his head, smiling distantly. ¡°Just don¡¯t upset yourself over it. I can always counsel you privately, if need be.¡± ¡°The need won¡¯t arise,¡± I said, and left it at that, focusing on the rhythm of our dance for a while instead. Jase always was such a magnificent dancer. He had a kind of grace and fluidity that David lacked. I guess it came from being so in touch with his emotions¡ªnot being afraid to feel or being seen to feel. There was this strange sensation that always came with it, too, much like that connection David and I had one of the first times we went out to the lake: the . . . gravitational pull. ¡°Has anyone told you how beautiful you look tonight?¡± Jase asked, distracting my thoughts. ¡°Of course.¡± He leaned down a little and kissed my head. ¡°When I saw you up there¡ª¡± he nodded to the top of the stairway, ¡°¡ªI was sure I felt my heart beat for the first time in a century, Ara. I mean, every time I look at you, I think you¡¯re the most beautiful girl in the world but, tonight, even you¡¯ve outdone yourself.¡± I blinked back the tiny pool of tears around my lashes. ¡°Thank you, Jase.¡± His lips pressed firmly into my head again. ¡°You¡¯re welc¡ª¡± ¡°Break it up, you two,¡± David snapped, drawing us suddenly apart. ¡°David!¡± I shrieked, looking around to see if anyone noticed. Only a few people looked up, but politely went about their own business. ¡°You both know the rules.¡± ¡°Rules?¡± Jase asked. ¡°You two are not allowed contact.¡± ¡°Who says?¡± Jason stepped between David and I a bit. ¡°I do.¡± ¡°You have no say who she¡ª¡± ¡°David, Jason is one of my council members now. We can dance if we want.¡± I went to step into Jason again, but David grabbed my wrist, yanking it away. ¡°That¡¯s it, you¡¯re coming with me.¡± ¡°David, let go of me.¡± I tugged against him. ¡°Stop wriggling. You¡¯re making a scene.¡± ¡°You are the one making a scene, brother,¡± Jason said, blocking his path. ¡°You have no right to order her around this way.¡± ¡°No right?¡± David asked in a high tone. ¡°I am her husband. I have every right.¡± ¡°No.¡± Jason moved closer, lowering his voice so it came as just a whisper through his teeth. ¡°You left her. You are bound only by a contract that states she is queen and you are king. Nothing else.¡± ¡°Precisely.¡± David shoved past him, dragging me along again. ¡°I have every legal right to do with her what I see fit.¡± ¡°If you touch her, I¡¯ll¡ª¡± ¡°Go ahead, brother.¡± David spun around, warding Jason off with an icy gaze. ¡°Hit me. Give me a reason to arrest you.¡± ¡°Jason,¡± Arthur called, sending a very stern gaze across the crowd and into Jason¡¯s intentions, altering them. Jase didn¡¯t move or shift in any way, but something in his eyes said he¡¯d backed down. ¡°Yeah, I didn¡¯t think you¡¯d have the guts,¡± David said, and led me away. I stumbled along, checking over my shoulder, but Jason was gone. ¡°We were just dancing, David.¡± ¡°To dance, one does not need to kiss.¡± ¡°You were watching us?¡± ¡°I noticed,¡± he said dully and shoved me into a chair in the corner under the stairs. ¡°There¡¯s a difference.¡± I landed hard, my teeth clucking as the chair slid an inch and hit the wall. No one looked up. No one even noticed. Or maybe no one really cared. ¡°You will stay here for the remainder of the evening, Ara, unless I say otherwise.¡± ¡°But¡ª¡± ¡°I said sit.¡± He forced me down again by aim of that stern, pointed finger. It made no physical contact, but I wasn¡¯t willing to challenge it. ¡°I want you where I can keep an eye on you.¡± ¡°You can¡¯t make me sit here.¡± ¡°I can, and I am. I will not have you making a slut of yourself in front of all these people. Now sit here and behave.¡± He turned away, dusting his hands off, and I heard the tail end of some smart remark about disciplining his wife, shrinking into myself when everyone nearby laughed. They waited until he walked away before casting their judging eyes on me, sending shrink rays onto the surface of my body. I turned in my seat, hunching over a little. I didn¡¯t care if my posture slacked or if I looked less than noble. I just wanted to hide in the darkest corner I could find. ¡°Would this pretty little girl in her party dress care to dance?¡± I looked up to Arthur¡¯s kind, smiling eyes. ¡°Arthur, I can¡¯t. David said I have to stay here.¡± He drew my hand toward him anyway, helping me stand. ¡°Let¡¯s see him challenge his old uncle, ehy.¡± I smiled, but it wasn¡¯t Arthur David would challenge; it was me. Except, I knew he¡¯d wait until we were alone. ¡°I¡¯m trying not to make him mad right now. He needs time to¡ª¡± ¡°He can have all the time he needs to heal, Amara.¡± He drew me closer, positioning our arms in an elegant sweep outward. ¡°But he does not need to hurt you and degrade you in the process. Now¡ª¡± We moved away and stepped onto the dance floor. ¡°Let us dance.¡± As we circled the room, couples dancing nearby bowed their heads, stepping in wider circles to give us room, as if I were some kind of royal entity or something. I smiled up at Arthur, so grateful he¡¯d come along when he did. I wouldn¡¯t challenge David in a room full of people: he¡¯d only make more of an effort to hold strong and put me in my place, and that would just create a massive scene, degrading David¡¯s pride even more in the process and hindering any hope I had of sorting things out with him. But Arthur, I could tell, was more than up for that challenge. Except, David wouldn¡¯t dare challenge his uncle. I wondered what it was about him that the boys feared and respected so much. Page 75 ¡°Ow.¡± Arthur laughed, looking down at his foot.Advertisement ¡°Oh my God. I¡¯m so sorry, Arthur.¡± I smiled sheepishly. ¡°Never mind, my dear. I imagine your centre of gravity has shifted slightly with the being you now grow inside you.¡± I looked down at the gap between Arthur and I where our bodies remained apart because of my bump. ¡°No, it¡¯s just that I can¡¯t really concentrate on the steps tonight.¡± I glanced over my shoulder. ¡°I can feel David¡¯s eyes on me.¡± Arthur¡¯s lips and brow crinkled as he looked over at his nephew, and the feeling, the energy of David, faded. ¡°Did he look away?¡± ¡°He did.¡± ¡°Thank you,¡± I said, exhaling the breath I didn¡¯t know I was holding. ¡°I will talk to him about this, Amara. It won¡¯t go unaddressed.¡± ¡°What won¡¯t?¡± ¡°His behaviour toward you tonight.¡± ¡°It wasn¡¯t that bad.¡± I shrugged. ¡°It was. He was cruel, Amara. And I¡¯ve heard several people mutter the same thing.¡± ¡°You did?¡± He nodded, tilting his head then as if listening to something. ¡°If you can spare a moment, Jason wants to see you.¡± ¡°He does?¡± ¡°He¡¯s waiting for you on the balcony.¡± ¡°Oh, I . . . I can¡¯t. David will have him arrested if we keep seeing each other.¡± ¡°Worry not, my dear. I¡¯ll distract David. You need to hear what Jason has to say.¡± We circled the dance floor again, my feet finally obeying my brain, but I stayed quiet, wondering what Jason wanted. When we reached to doors to the balcony, Arthur made a cheeky turn and swept us out of the room, twirling me straight into Jason¡¯s arms. ¡°All my prayers answered in one twirl,¡± Jase said, both arms gently wrapping me up. I stood on my toes for a second and touched my nose to his. ¡°I¡¯m sorry about what happened before.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t apologise for anything, Ara.¡± He kissed my nose. ¡°David was the jerk.¡± My heels touched the ground again and I turned to thank Arthur, but he was gone. ¡°Where¡¯d he¡ª¡± ¡°He¡¯s playing Distraction with the king.¡± ¡°How will he keep him away?¡± ¡°Don¡¯t you worry your pretty little head about that.¡± He tucked a curl behind my ear. ¡°I need to talk to you about something.¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°I can protect you,¡± he said, his eyes round and so dark with hope. ¡°I could have legal right to step in when he¡¯s mistreating you.¡± ¡°How?¡± ¡°Marry me.¡± I laughed. ¡°Jase¡ª¡± ¡°Ara, the queen is allowed more than one husband. Make me your second. Let me protect you, love you, be there every time you¡¯re hurt or sick.¡± ¡°You are now.¡± ¡°No. I get shut out¡ªtold I have no right to comfort you or make decisions for you. I am the one person here who cares more about you than myself, and I¡ª¡± ¡°Jase, I know, okay,¡± I cut in, pressing my hand flat to his chest. ¡°But I¡¯m not marrying you just so you can be my bodyguard.¡± ¡°Do you think that¡¯s the only reason I¡¯m asking you?¡± My smile copied his. ¡°Ara, that¡¯s my convincing argument to make you say yes.¡± I laughed through my nose again, wiping under it after. ¡°See, I love you even if you snot on yourself every time you laugh.¡± This time I blew the laughter out through my lips, and stepped into him, slowly sliding both arms along his waist. ¡°I said I didn¡¯t want to love you, Jase, because I needed to make a decision. I needed to choose and commit to one guy, for once in my life. And I know it¡¯s too late for David and I, but this is my commitment, whether he wants me or not. I won¡¯t marry another while he¡¯s still breathing, even if I legally can have two husbands.¡± ¡°I understand that.¡± ¡°See, I don¡¯t think you do. I think you know that you and I make a much better couple and that you¡¯re better for me in so many ways but, Jase¡ª¡± I looked through the doors at David, distracted by a group of Lower House members. ¡°You have so much heart and you¡¯re so easy to love. And, David . . . he¡¯s got a darker side that I worry for¡ªthat I don¡¯t think anybody else in this world understands. I just feel like. . .¡± I looked at Jase again, moving my shoulders up once. ¡°If I don¡¯t love him, who will?¡± Jase let out a hot breath across the night sky and twirled me gracefully into his arms, cradling my spine to his chest, both of us just watching the candlelight from inside flicker shadows around the garden below us. ¡°You''re going to be okay, you know.¡± ¡°How do you know?¡± He pressed his lips to the top of my head, his warm breath making me hold mine. ¡°Because I''m going to make sure of it.¡± ¡°And how will you do that?¡± ¡°One day, things will be different for us, Ara. I believe that somewhere out there under those stars is a future for us, and maybe it¡¯s decades away into eternity, but I love you. I¡¯ve loved you under the most insane conditions, and I won''t ever give up hope for us.¡± He turned me to face him again. ¡°Things are going to get worse before they get better, but I''m here, and I just need you to know that you¡¯ll always have a home to come to in my heart, Ara. It belongs to you eternally.¡± He touched his chest. ¡°Just hold onto that when things get dark.¡± I nodded, standing on my toes as he pressed his lips to my head. ¡°You¡¯re a good man, Jase.¡± ¡°No. I''m the man who destroyed my brother. I''m not good, but I love you, and I¡¯d die for you.¡± ¡°What is the meaning of this?¡± David roared, thrusting both doors open at once. We broke apart, Jason tucking me safely behind him. ¡°It¡¯s not her fault, David.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t care whose fault it is. She is to come inside at once.¡± ¡°We¡¯re just talking. She¡ª¡± ¡°Do not test the lengths I will go to to keep you and her apart, brother. I will¡ª¡± ¡°It¡¯s okay.¡± I patted Jason¡¯s arm, stepping out from the shadows. The moonlight moved up from the ground, over my dress and lit my face, and the anger in David slowly simmered down. ¡°I¡¯ll go inside now.¡± ¡°You will do no such thing.¡± David rushed forward and grabbed my arm. ¡°You¡¯re to go to bed. Now.¡± ¡°But I¡¯m not tired.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t care.¡± I tried to twist my wrist from his grip, searching everywhere for one of my Guard. But they were all distracted¡ªeven Falcon. ¡°You can¡¯t make me go if I don¡¯t want to.¡± ¡°Try me.¡± ¡°I. . .¡± I studied my feet. ¡°I¡¯ll tell Arthur.¡± ¡°And what¡¯s he going to do about it?¡± I looked David right in the eye this time, pursing my lips, then said, ¡°Try him.¡± ¡°What¡¯s going on here?¡± Falcon cut in, wrapping my hips and drawing me away from David. But David wouldn¡¯t let go. In one tug, he yanked me back onto his side of the line. Falcon¡¯s hand fell onto the sword in his own belt. ¡°Where are you taking her?¡± ¡°To bed,¡± David said coldly, then motioned to the guards by the door. ¡°See that my brother makes it back to his room, and stays there.¡± ¡°Yes, Majesty.¡± They bowed, and the jig was up. ¡°Forget it, Ara,¡± Jason said with a dismissive headshake. ¡°He¡¯s not worth it.¡± I nodded. Jase was right. We could sort this mess out tomorrow. Now wasn¡¯t the time. ¡°It¡¯s okay, Falcon. I¡¯m just gonna go to bed.¡± ¡°But you haven¡¯t even eaten yet, you¡¯ll¡ª¡± ¡°She can grab an apple on the way out.¡± David turned and dragged me along behind him, snatching a red, shiny piece of fruit from a bowl as we hurried out the doors by the fireplace, the painted Lilith looking down on me like she found it all so amusing. ¡°What are you smiling at?¡± I asked her spitefully. ¡°I don¡¯t like having to treat you like a child, Ara,¡± David said, pulling me up the stairs by my wrist. ¡°But you can¡¯t expect me to stand by and let you fraternise with the very man who ruined your marriage.¡± ¡°He didn¡¯t ruin it, David. I did.¡± David stopped walking and looked back down at me. The music lilting out from the doors of the Great Hall just in front of us carried all the joy and excitement of those still allowed in the room. I felt cold and empty and left out from where I stood now. ¡°It takes two to tango,¡± he said coldly. ¡°Yes, but his reasons for ¡°dancing¡± in the first place weren¡¯t the same as mine.¡± His brow slowly creased in the middle and he moved down a step so our eyes aligned. ¡°What do you mean?¡± I tried to wriggle free from his grip, but it tightened. ¡°He wanted me to carry his child.¡± ¡°Why?¡± he asked, his voice cracking with confusion. ¡°Because then he could use the Dagger and kill Drake, and I would never have had to lose you.¡± His grasp on my wrist loosened, but didn¡¯t drop. ¡°But the law doesn¡¯t work that way.¡± ¡°I know. But we didn¡¯t know that at the time, and¡ª¡± ¡°That¡¯s what he tried to tell me¡ªthat day in Eve¡¯s room, wasn¡¯t it?¡± He stepped closer, grabbing my other wrist, the apple tucked between his pinkie and his ring finger. ¡°Ara, that¡¯s what he wanted to say. He¡ª¡± ¡°He realised then that he¡¯d made a mistake. That even if he had got me pregnant, it still wouldn¡¯t have saved you.¡± He dropped both my wrists and took a step back, turning away with the back of his hand over his mouth. ¡°But . . . he¡¯s in love with you.¡± ¡°Yes. That¡¯s why he chose to die and leave me with the only man I wanted.¡± He looked at me then, but the hatred was still fierce in his eyes. ¡°And what about you? You said you that your reasons for sleeping with him were different to his. What¡ª¡± ¡°I won¡¯t lie.¡± I clutched the edges of my dress, looking down. ¡°I¡¯ve lied enough to you, David. And¡ª¡± ¡°Look at me when you speak,¡± he said, thrusting my chin up. Our eyes met and mine filled with tears, not ready to see him break all over again. ¡°The truth is, I laid with him because I wanted to save you. But at some point in . . . in that time, I realised I loved him too much to lose to him. And¡ª¡± He sighed and stepped away again. ¡°And then, I decided that I didn¡¯t want to love him. And I was angry at myself for feeling anything for him. I thought¡ª¡± Page 76 ¡°Just stop.¡± He put his hand up. ¡°I can¡¯t hear any more of this.¡±Advertisement ¡°You need to know the truth, though, David.¡± ¡°I know the truth,¡± he yelled. ¡°You love him. And that¡¯s all there is to know.¡± He grabbed my arm again and spun me on the spot, leading me up the stairs faster than before. I tripped on the front of my dress, stumbling a little as my shoe slipped off my foot and fell a few steps down. David didn¡¯t notice, though, or he didn¡¯t care. He just dragged me along, tossing the apple he was carrying in the first plant he saw. ¡°You¡¯ve taken everything away from me, Ara,¡± he said as we reached the third floor corridor. ¡°I have no reason to live now, and no reason to die. The Dagger is gone. My wife is gone, and I¡¯m nothing but a king without a purpose.¡± ¡°Well, at least you¡¯re still king,¡± I said spitefully. ¡°You think that¡¯s all that matters to me?¡± ¡°It seems to be.¡± I folded my arms as we stopped by my bedroom door. ¡°It was always your greatest dream.¡± ¡°Ara. You. Were. My. Only dream.¡± He laughed incredulously, looking off to one side for a second. ¡°You just never understood that.¡± ¡°Yet you¡¯ve done everything to prove so far that that¡¯s a lie, David.¡± ¡°Like what?¡± ¡°Like the way you treat me, and how much you hate me for telling you the truth.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t hate you for telling the truth, Ara. I hate you for sleeping with my brother,¡± he said, leaning in so his face was right in front of mine. ¡°And, as far as I¡¯m concerned, I may have little reason left to live, but I¡¯ve even less reason to let you or my brother live. I just can¡¯t do it. I can¡¯t rule this monarchy if I have to look at you every day.¡± He opened my door and shoved me inside. ¡°You need to stay in here until I decide what to do with you.¡± ¡°David, wait.¡± I ran forward before he could close the door. And I wanted to argue or plead with him, but his eyes had gone completely black, like he wasn¡¯t even alive in there anymore¡ªas if the vampire had stepped up to save his heart from the complication of feeling, and completely wiped my David away in the process. I took a humble step backward and spoke to the floor. ¡°I . . . I can¡¯t get this dress off by myself. Can you send¡ª¡± ¡°You can sleep in it,¡± he barked and slammed the door shut in my face. I heard the keys rattle in the lock, and when I tried the handle a second later, it wouldn''t turn. But my stomach did. I laid my hand over it, waiting for the quivering to stop. I could¡¯ve ended it. I could¡¯ve lied and told David the only reason I slept with Jase was to save his life¡ªthat I didn¡¯t love Jason anywhere in my heart. But we¡¯d founded our love on lies from the beginning: the truth I carried back then for loving Mike. The truth he carried for the man and the creature he was that he would never show me. One lie after another had come between us, and I just couldn¡¯t look him in the eye and tell him I didn¡¯t, and that I never loved Jase. I didn¡¯t want to love him, but what did that mean, really? It was stupid and it couldn¡¯t be classed as a real emotion in any way, shape, or form. But it was how I felt. I loved both of them equally once, and my love for David grew beyond what I felt for Jase. Only, now, David was killing that love off just a little bit every day. I knew he was hurt. I knew he needed time to deal with how he was feeling, but a part of me wondered if maybe this was just it¡ªthis was how it would be forever now. How little could he have loved me before if he wasn¡¯t willing to at least try to forgive me? Then again, how little could I ever have loved him to expect that? All I could hope for now was a quick and painless death for Jason. I didn¡¯t even have a hope that I might join him one day, because as soon as my baby turned eighteen, I¡¯d be killed, and my soul would belong to Lilith again. And the fact that I knew, so deep it was almost a part of me, that David would find comfort in my death made the heaving in my gut quicken. A blast of vomit spilled into my fingertips, landing in the toilet only by the pure miracle of the vampire speed I used to get to the bathroom. I sobbed as hard as I vomited, my stomach churning and burning like a hole was being ripped open inside me. ¡°Shh,¡± said a quiet voice, and my hair moved back off my face under soft fingertips. ¡°Just breathe, sweet girl. Don¡¯t cry.¡± ¡°Jase?¡± I coughed and spat into the toilet again, wiping my hand along my mouth. ¡°Just breathe.¡± His smiling face was there waiting for me when I turned around. ¡°How did you get in here?¡± ¡°Went out the window,¡± he said casually, a half smile turning one corner of his lip. I stood up just a little, still cramped and sore. ¡°You could get in big trouble, you know?¡± He just nodded and said, ¡°I know,¡± then handed me a facecloth. ¡°Thank you.¡± I blotted the smudged mascara from under my eyes first, then wiped my mouth clean. ¡°Come on then.¡± He spun me at the shoulders so I faced the mirror on the wall above the sink. ¡°Let¡¯s get this dress off you.¡± ¡°Do you know how to undo it?¡± He stopped for a second and leaned forward to whisper in my ear. ¡°I¡¯ve undone my fair share of corsets, Ara.¡± I laughed timidly, reaching down to hold the counter top. Pull by pull, the corset came loose and my lungs expanded, revelling in the simplest form of freedom. ¡°You¡¯re a lifesaver, Jase.¡± His arm circled my waist, a flat hand holding the front of my dress to my ribs as he turned me slowly to face him, pressing a very warm, very sweet kiss to my cheek. ¡°I¡¯m sorry about what happened tonight.¡± I closed my eyes and moved my face along his lips, feeling them brush so softly over my skin that it tingled. ¡°Don¡¯t be sorry, Jase.¡± ¡°But I am all the same. He shouldn''t treat you like that.¡± ¡°I know.¡± I snuggled into his chest, holding my breath as his warm hands cupped my spine and the dress fell downward, held there by my hips, leaving my bare breasts against Jason¡¯s shirt. ¡°I tried to defend myself against him, but he¡¯s so. . .¡± ¡°Forceful.¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± I nodded. ¡°Well, he doesn¡¯t own you.¡± He smoothed his hand down my waist and pushed the dress away, helping me step out of it. ¡°If he keeps this up, I¡¯ll kidnap you, and he¡¯ll never see you again. I swear it on my mother¡¯s grave.¡± I laughed, tossing the dress off to the side. ¡°I¡¯d kinda like that.¡± ¡°Really?¡± Jase pulled me closer by my bare hips. ¡°Because I¡¯ve made plans, Ara. All you have to do is say the word, and we¡¯ll be gone so fast they won¡¯t realise it until we¡¯re in another country.¡± I thought long and hard in that few seconds as I laid my cheek to his chest and let out a breath. ¡°I can¡¯t run from my problems.¡± ¡°Of course you can.¡± He laughed, tangling his fingers in my hair and sliding a few pins out so it all dropped loosely down my back. ¡°But, let¡¯s just get some clothes on you and get you to bed for now. We¡¯ll talk more about it when you¡¯re ready.¡± ¡°That sounds good,¡± I said, but instead of moving away, I slowly lifted one arm, then the other, up to his neck and wrapped them tightly around him, angling my head so my crown wouldn¡¯t chill his jaw. ¡°Thank you, Jase. I really needed someone just now.¡± He squeezed me a little tighter, breathing me in deeply. ¡°I know.¡± The song of summer birds was gone when I opened my eyes, having retreated with the day that began before this one. Only rain owned these skies now, leaving a very clear, very stern warning that winter was on its way. I¡¯d never seen the snow at the manor, but people had told me there was nothing like it in all the world. I flattened my covers to the bed beside me, wishing I could reach across and hold Jason¡¯s hand. He stayed only long enough for me to drift away last night, then disappeared out the window, leaving me safely tucked up in bed. I could sense Falcon nearby, despite the hour being too early for him to be on duty. I wanted to rap on my door and ask if David had unlocked it, but I wasn¡¯t really sure I wanted to know. The mother of nature called to me from the forest outside, her angelic voice a whispering patter among the rain. She wanted to see me, needed to see me. But unless I jumped from the balcony, I would remain a princess in a tower, guarded by a dragon, for who knew how long. Or maybe not as long as I thought. . . The door latch clicked then and I drew the sheets to my chest, sitting up a little as it swung open and David ushered the butler in. ¡°Morning, My Queen.¡± The old man bowed, placing a tray at my feet. ¡°Morning, Edgar.¡± He smiled again and turned, leaving the room quickly. ¡°David,¡± I called before he shut the door. ¡°What?¡± ¡°You¡¯re not planning to lock me in here again, are you?¡± He looked at the door handle, then at me. ¡°From this day on, you will eat in private quarters. You may leave your room for council and court sessions only and, for anything else, you will need my approval.¡± ¡°You¡¯re imprisoning me!¡± ¡°I¡¯m keeping you out of my sight so I don¡¯t kill you and, in turn, the child you¡¯re carrying.¡± ¡°David?¡± He sighed, opening the door again. ¡°What?¡± ¡°I made a mistake, but I don¡¯t deserve to die for it.¡± ¡°I disagree.¡± ¡°Look, if you wanted to punish me, it¡¯s working. I feel like hell inside, okay?¡± I motioned to my tight chest. ¡°It feels like you¡¯ve ripped every part of my beating heart out and put it in a blender. But I¡¯m a living being, and I can only take so much.¡± ¡°So, what? Because I don¡¯t have a heartbeat, that means you can do whatever you want to hurt m¡ª¡± ¡°That¡¯s not what I¡¯m saying.¡± I pushed the covers back and sat up on my knees, holding the ¡®I am queen; now do as I say¡¯ card back for if really needed. ¡°I . . . I know you hate me. You have every right to. But please don¡¯t lock me away. I¡¯ll stay out of sight, I swear. I¡ª¡± ¡°Wait, how did you get your dress off?¡± I looked around the room. ¡°I . . . I ripped it.¡± He frowned. ¡°It was too tight,¡± I lied, shrugging innocently. He just groaned and backed away, leaving the door open. I wasn¡¯t sure if that meant I could come out, but I even if it didn¡¯t, I wasn¡¯t staying in here any longer. I grabbed my red velvet cloak from the closet, undressed, and darted from the room. There was only one place on this earth I was safe from the wrath of David¡¯s broken heart, no matter what, and if he wanted me gone, invisible, then that¡¯s where I planned to stay¡ªat least for the rest of the day. Page 77 The mother offered comfort as I cried my eyes out, lying naked, curled in a ball at the base of the Stone, my bloody hand against it. The forest swarmed around me, birds and small animals showing themselves, forming a protective barrier between me and the rest of the world. I knew the depth of my agony was multiplied by a million hormones my body didn¡¯t understand, but that didn¡¯t make the pain any less real.Advertisement ¡°What do I do, Mother?¡± I whispered. ¡°I already gave you the answer.¡± ¡°When?¡± ¡°When you came to us and asked the question.¡± ¡°The question?¡± I thought about it for a second, scraping a few leaves off my cheek to stop the slight itch there. ¡°Do you mean when you said Jason was the answer?¡± ¡°Yes.¡± I pictured that day¡ªhis smile¡ªthe way he broke when I said I would never be with him. ¡°How is he the answer?¡± ¡°Finally,¡± she said, appearing atop the stone in the elegant form of her mortal self. ¡°You¡¯ve asked the right question.¡± I sat up, drawing my bloodied hand away from the Stone and tucking it in my lap. The dirt and leaves shifted under me, cushioning my bare bottom, while the rich scent of soil grounded my floating heart. ¡°Then tell me. Just tell me what I¡¯m supposed to do.¡± ¡°You¡¯re supposed to follow your heart.¡± ¡°My heart still wants David.¡± She smiled, her blue eyes, so like mine, shining bright with the life of the forest. ¡°You are destined to be with Jason, Auress. It has been written now for some time.¡± ¡°No.¡± I shook my head, standing up quickly. ¡°I love him. I can¡¯t help but to love him. He¡¯s amazing and kind and sweet, but it¡¯s not right.¡± She just nodded, her thin smile offering me no alternative. ¡°It¡¯ll kill David.¡± ¡°No,¡± she said. ¡°It will save him.¡± ¡°How so?¡± ¡°When the time comes, the love you offer that boy¡ªthat sweet Jason¡ªwill give him the strength and courage to save you all.¡± ¡°Save us?¡± Her head moved down, then up, slowly. ¡°So . . . I have to love him to save David.¡± I frowned, looking down at the Stone. ¡°That doesn¡¯t make any sense.¡± ¡°Very little does in life before we cross the line of Fate and see everything for the lesson or important event it always was. Even the tiniest setback in life can often be for the greatest benefit.¡± ¡°But it is to our benefit¡ªto be with Jase?¡± ¡°To the benefit of all.¡± Her form wavered a little as the cut in my hand healed over and the blood on the Stone faded. ¡°But . . . wait.¡± I tried to touch her to bring her back. ¡°I¡¯m not ready to let go of David yet.¡± ¡°Then talk with him,¡± she said, becoming an echo and nothing more than a flickering fog. ¡°He will help you cross sides.¡± ¡°How?¡± ¡°Talk with him. You will be surer of your path every time you hear him speak.¡± ¡°But¡ª¡± I stopped when my words fell on an empty forest. ¡°I don¡¯t want to lose him,¡± I muttered to myself. I didn¡¯t want this path. I loved Jason because he was hard not to love. But I loved David no matter what, even when I hated him. Why would the mother of Life ask me to throw that away? I spent the better part of the day pacing the halls, thinking about my walk in the forest. When I passed Walt near the Great Hall and he said David had gone into town, I took the perfect opportunity to go and visit with Jase, who still hadn¡¯t come out of his room. He hadn¡¯t been locked in, like me, but he was keeping a low profile. ¡°Hoping to find something different to the last few hundred times you¡¯ve read that?¡± I asked, leaning on the doorframe. Jase sat up and tucked my suicide letter under his thigh. ¡°I didn¡¯t hear you come in. I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°Well, that¡¯s because I didn¡¯t knock first.¡± I pushed up from my lean and wandered into his room. ¡°You don¡¯t have to knock, Ara. You¡¯re welcome in here any time.¡± I smiled and sat down on the foot of the bed. ¡°So, why are you still reading that letter?¡± He drew it out from under his leg and flattened the page. ¡°I¡¯m trying to understand something.¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°Why you said, and I quote, ¡®I love you, Jase. I¡¯ve loved you for so long and, in a different life, we would have been married, had a family, and lived together forever.¡¯¡± He looked up from the letter. ¡°How can you feel that and then, the minute you¡¯re free from David, deny me the chance to be with you?¡± ¡°Jase.¡± I sighed, flopping back on the bed. ¡°I¡¯m not free. I told you. I¡ª¡± ¡°You¡¯re committing to him even if he doesn¡¯t want you,¡± he said in a mock girl¡¯s voice. ¡°I know. I remember all too clearly. But why? I don¡¯t understand why, after everything he¡¯s done¡ªthe way he¡¯s treated you, you can¡¯t see that he¡¯s not going to come ¡®round, Ara.¡± I thought about it for a second. ¡°Forgiveness takes time.¡± Jase laughed. ¡°Ara, David and I are still fighting over who broke the bottle of Port in Uncle Arthur¡¯s study sixty years ago.¡± I laughed too. ¡°He can hold a grudge for hundreds of years¡ªespecially against a girl he let into his heart. He¡¯s feeling exposed and damaged in ways even he doesn¡¯t understand and, Ara, if he was capable of forgiveness. . .¡± ¡°It would be decades away. I know.¡± Jase huffed, and I heard the drawer in his nightstand close, his shadow coming over my face a second later. I looked up into his smiling green eyes. ¡°If he. . .¡± He juggled the words in the back of his throat. ¡°He can be mean, Ara. If he wants you to hurt, you can be damn sure you¡¯re going to hurt.¡± ¡°I know,¡± I said positively. ¡°I¡¯ll be okay.¡± ¡°Yes, but . . . eventually he¡¯ll do or say something to hurt you beyond repair. And I don¡¯t want this to happen, Ara, but I have no control over it. Just¡ª¡± He sat back, and I rolled onto my side to watch him. ¡°If the day ever comes where you decide you don¡¯t want his forgiveness anymore, do you think you¡¯d¡ª¡± ¡°I promise.¡± I reached across and cupped his hand. ¡°Promise what?¡± ¡°I promise I¡¯ll marry you then.¡± His face split into a wide, pearly grin. He looked up from our hands, making me smile too. ¡°I will hold you to that promise.¡± ¡°You won¡¯t need to. If I believe things are truly over for David and I, I wouldn¡¯t hesitate to marry you, Jase. And it¡¯d take hell to stop me.¡± ¡°Then¡ª¡± He kissed my hand. ¡°Until that day, I pray you fall out of love with him, but I hope it¡¯s not for the cruelty he shows you. I don¡¯t want you to suffer that way.¡± I flopped onto my back and stared up at the ceiling, softly rubbing my belly. Then, quietly, without warning, the vampire beside me placed his hand over mine. It felt warm and safe and so comfortable I moved my own hand away and let him feel the baby inside me. ¡°I¡¯m gonna take care of her, Ara. She¡¯ll never want for love a day in her life.¡± ¡°So, you¡¯d be willing to take on a kid that¡¯s not yours?¡± ¡°Ara, she is a part of you, and that makes her a part of me. As far as I¡¯m concerned, she is of my own flesh and blood.¡± I pouted, half smiling. ¡°Sometimes, I wish she was yours.¡± He leaned down and kissed my belly, hovering there for a few seconds after. ¡°Me too.¡± My gaze left his lips and the soft skin of my belly under them, and moved onto the side of his face. So much had happened between us. His face was one I used to fear and yet, now, it was the one I looked for when everything was falling apart. I slid my thumb down his cheekbone, thinking back to the day I confessed our affair¡ªhow I found him bruised and beaten in the cellblock. ¡°Hey, Jase?¡± ¡°Mm?¡± ¡°Who hurt you the day David had you arrested?¡± He looked up, his smile blending with a frown. ¡°He didn¡¯t tell you?¡± ¡°Who didn¡¯t tell me what?¡± He laughed, sitting back. ¡°Falcon.¡± ¡°What?¡± I sat up. ¡°He did it?¡± ¡°Yeah.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°He . . . he was pretty pissed off. As soon as David left you alone in your room, Falcon came down and made sure I paid dearly for every inch of flesh I ever touched on you.¡± ¡°Oh, Jase.¡± I touched his hand. ¡°I didn¡¯t know. I¡¯m so sorry.¡± ¡°It¡¯s okay. I kinda deserved it.¡± ¡°No, you didn¡¯t. And why didn¡¯t you tell me who did it?¡± ¡°Aw, Ara, I wasn¡¯t gonna do that,¡± he said simply. ¡°You love Falcon. I didn¡¯t wanna upset you.¡± ¡°But I am upset. I can¡¯t believe he¡¯d¡ª¡± ¡°Really?¡± he said smugly. ¡°You really can¡¯t believe he¡¯d do that?¡± I bit my lip, huffing my hair off my brow. ¡°I guess I can believe he¡¯d beat you senseless. But it¡¯s not like him to take the law into his own hands.¡± ¡°He wasn¡¯t really thinking then, Ara. You might say he was blind with rage.¡± ¡°Wait.¡± I grabbed Jase¡¯s forearm. ¡°He¡¯s not bound by the Curse of Lilith, is he? Like Blade was¡ª¡± ¡°No.¡± He shook his head, smiling. ¡°He just cares about you and wanted to deck the guy who ruined your life.¡± I relaxed a bit then. ¡°Like a big brother?¡± ¡°Exactly. Come here¡ª¡± Jase reached out and tugged my sleeve until I crawled over and laid between his legs, my spine to his chest, his back leaned against the bedpost. ¡°Don¡¯t tell him you know. Just let him have this one, okay?¡± ¡°Yeah, okay then.¡± I nodded. ¡°I just can¡¯t make sense of it, though.¡± ¡°Of what?¡± ¡°I really adore Falcon, but the Curse of Lilith is supposed to befall any man with a heartbeat who is unlucky enough to be cared for by me¡ª¡± ¡°Unless they¡¯ve been in, or are, in true love with someone else.¡± ¡°Yeah, but¡ª¡± ¡°Falcon¡¯s been in love before,¡± he stated. ¡°He has?¡± Jase nodded once against the side of my face. ¡°I read all of his thoughts¡ªpast and present¡ªwhen he was laying in to me. He lost his fianc¨¦, Felicity, a few years back.¡± ¡°How?¡± ¡°Car accident.¡± ¡°Serious?¡± ¡°Yeah. He called her over to help him sort out an argument with his sister, Annie. But she stormed off in a hurry before Felicity got there, didn¡¯t even check the road before crossing it. She hit Felicity¡¯s windshield and the car swerved into oncoming traffic. . .¡± His lips pursed into a thin line. ¡°Felicity got just the smallest knock to the head, but she died in hospital shortly after Annie.¡± Page 78 The scene played out in my head, probably pictured all wrong, but the grief that came with it was unmistakeable. ¡°What was their fight about?¡±Advertisement His closed lips angled up on the edges into a smile. ¡°She¡¯d been with a boy Falcon didn¡¯t approve of and . . . she got pregnant.¡± I closed my eyes for a second. ¡°That¡¯s just so tragic.¡± He nodded. ¡°So, go easy on him. In a lot of ways, what he did to me wasn¡¯t just for you¡ªit was for Annie, too.¡± I angled my head and kissed the side of his jaw. ¡°I¡¯m sorry he did that.¡± ¡°Well, you just made it all worth it.¡± I laughed and lay my hands on his where he rested them over my belly. Despite David hating his brother, thankfully, he hadn¡¯t revoked his approval for the lab. Jase was ordering parts and pieces, and I was supposed to meet him in the field to demonstrate my new rock-blasting tricks at their best. But as I walked into the Great Hall, the round, shiny surface of a golden apple caught my eye, just sitting there on the dining table for anyone to find. ¡°How did you get out here?¡± I asked the apple, walking over. ¡°I put it there,¡± Eve said, flickering and waving suddenly in front of me like smoke. ¡°Why, Eve? Someone might see it. What are you playing at?¡± ¡°Needed to get your attention. You don¡¯t see me so much anymore when I¡¯m in the room.¡± ¡°I don¡¯t?¡± She shook her small head. ¡°Well, why did you need my attention?¡± ¡°Because I wanted you to see something,¡± she whispered, then reached across and flicked the apple onto the floor. It hit with a mighty thud, leaving a small dent in the wood. ¡°Really, Eve, was that necessary?¡± I bent down to pick it up, and two pairs of feet came charging into the room from under the stairway. I stayed put for a second, hoping they¡¯d pass, otherwise it might look like I was hiding down here under the table, and I wasn¡¯t about to show them the apple, either. ¡°Emily. Just¡ª¡± Blade ran after her, spinning her around in one swift, knightly move. ¡°Please don¡¯t walk away from me.¡± ¡°What do you expect me to say, Blade?¡± she cried. ¡°Don¡¯t say anything,¡± he said, and that accent made me wish for a second that he was talking to me. ¡°Em, just let me hold you. Let me¡ª¡± ¡°There¡¯s nothing you can do to make this better. Don¡¯t you get it? It doesn¡¯t matter what you feel for me. I¡¯m damaged goods!¡± ¡°Aw, Em.¡± He rolled his head to one side. ¡°You¡¯re not to me.¡± ¡°How can you say that? How can you want me after what he just told you?¡± His shoulders dropped and he looked down at the ground, then off to one side. ¡°See?¡± ¡°No. Em.¡± He grabbed her wrist. ¡°You don¡¯t understand. I¡¯m not upset about that. I¡¯m upset because I don¡¯t know how to make you see that none of that matters to me.¡± She stopped trying to pull away from him and just stood there. ¡°You¡¯re not . . . repulsed by me?¡± Blade laughed. ¡°You could sleep with Arthur and I wouldn¡¯t be repulsed by you. It¡¯s gonna take a lot more than sex with that creep to keep me from you. And, besides¡ª¡± He braved another step closer. ¡°You were human then, and it was a long time ago.¡± ¡°Not for me, it wasn¡¯t. It feels like only yesterday.¡± She hugged herself, looking at her feet. Blade wrapped both arms around her, his shoulders tense for the first few breaths until it became clear Emily wouldn¡¯t push him away. ¡°I¡¯m sorry he did that to you, Em,¡± he whispered into her hair. ¡°But he¡¯s the fool. Not you.¡± And now I was very curious about what Em had told him. ¡°Mike couldn¡¯t look at me after,¡± she whimpered. ¡°He said he still loved me but he just needed time to make sense of it all.¡± I covered my mouth. That boy needed to read Relationships, for Dummies. ¡°I know that makes you feel like he doesn¡¯t care about you, but they were friends¡ªclose friends. And he¡¯s had to come to terms with this new David he¡¯s seen rise as king, and then with all of this.¡± He squeezed her a bit tighter. ¡°He doesn¡¯t blame you. And he didn¡¯t mean to tell me, either.¡± ¡°I know.¡± She nodded against his chest. ¡°Have you told Ara?¡± Her head moved in a no. ¡°I¡¯ve never found the words.¡± ¡°To tell me what?¡± I asked, standing up then to make my presence known. Emily spun around in Blade¡¯s arms, her brown eyes going wide. ¡°Ara.¡± ¡°Emily.¡± I moved a bit closer, stepping cautiously. Somehow, right now, I got the sense that I was the last person she wanted to see. ¡°What were you talking about?¡± ¡°You were listening?¡± she yelled, jerking forward. ¡°I was passing by, and I. . .¡± I smirked at Blade. ¡°I thought Blade was finally confessing his love for you. I just wanted to listen.¡± ¡°Living vicariously through me now, huh?¡± she said sarcastically. ¡°If you must know¡ª¡± I propped both hands on my hips, checking under the table quickly to see if the apple was hidden enough. ¡°Yes. And I¡¯m sorry for that, but . . . I just wanted to see you happy. That¡¯s all.¡± Her dead-straight spine relaxed again, and Blade and I followed suit. ¡°So you knew he was in love with me, too?¡± she asked, jerking her head at Blade. I couldn''t help but smile. She rolled her eyes, but I knew the action didn¡¯t fit the feeling. She was happy¡ªhappier than I¡¯d seen her in ages. ¡°So, what was it Mike couldn¡¯t handle, Em? Why did you break up?¡± She sighed, looked at Blade, then moved over and took my hand. ¡°I need to show you something.¡± ¡°O . . . kay.¡± I noticed her nervousness enough to check Blade''s reaction, too. He was about as tense as a lamb in a field of wolves. Emily ducked her head and lifted it again, sweeping her hair back off her shoulder. ¡°Look.¡± ¡°I see a scar and¡ª¡± I looked a bit closer, and just above the little silver scar left from the day Jase turned her was a tiny greenish-black dot¡ªlike a tattooed freckle. ¡°A Mark?¡± She drew her hair back over her shoulder. ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°From . . . like what humans get when they have sex with a vampire?¡± She nodded. ¡°But . . . Mike was your first and last. And he was Lilithian by the time you guys had sex. And Lilithians don¡¯t leave¡ª¡± ¡°Mike was not this poor girl¡¯s first.¡± Blade exhaled his words. An invisible rug came out from under my feet. ¡°What do you mean? Who was?¡± Blade cleared his throat. ¡°Your husband.¡± A vacuum slowly sucked the air from the room, my mouth going completely dry. ¡°Ara?¡± Emily stepped forward, but I waved her off, walking blindly toward the glass doors. ¡°Ara?¡± Blade tried, too, his voice going straight to my inner message bank. David and Emily. David and Emily. He slept with her. He held her like he held me. His hands on her hips; his lips touching hers; his naked body completely wrapped up in hers. All the images of them dancing together at my house¡ªEmily in her green dress; David, so tall and so handsome¡ªcame rushing back to haunt me, blending and mixing with my own images of David¡¯s naked body, scattering everything I thought I knew and replacing it with her. And him. Naked. Together. The ground changed from wood floors to stone steps to long, swishy grass under my feet, until I reached the sunny clearing and fell to my knees a few hundred feet from my oak tree, sinking my hands into the ground to hold myself up. ¡°Ara?¡± ¡°Emily,¡± I said into the earth, watching another tear fall between my knees. ¡°I''m sorry you had to find out that way.¡± Her shadow darkened my hands as she stood over me. I sobbed a little harder. ¡°Was there a better way to find out?¡± ¡°I guess not.¡± ¡°Ara?¡± Jason¡¯s arms wrapped my body and he swept me into his chest. ¡°Damn it. Don''t run off like that.¡± ¡°Like what?¡± He leaned out, wiping his thumbs down my tear-soaked face. ¡°I called to you several times. You just ignored me.¡± ¡°I¡¯m sorry.¡± ¡°Don¡¯t be sorry, Ara. You just scared me, is all.¡± I looked at Emily then, and the pity in her eyes made it all hurt so much more. She knew. All along. She knew what it was like to be with my husband. She lied to me. He lied to me. Why would they do that? ¡°How did she find out?¡± Jason asked Emily in a very short, almost harsh tone. ¡°Wait!¡± I pushed away from him, falling back in the grass on my palms. ¡°You knew?¡± ¡°Only recently.¡± He reached for me again. I moved away. ¡°How recent?¡± ¡°The day I turned Em.¡± ¡°That''s not really what I call recent.¡± ¡°I know. And I tried to tell you, but everything happened after that. Then I was supposedly dead. And there hasn¡¯t really been a good moment to break your heart like that with the news, Ara. Not to mention¡ª¡± He sat down on his butt with a huge sigh. ¡°David really should have been the one to tell you.¡± I bit my lips and turned my gaze on Em. ¡°Why didn''t you tell me? You could have told me from the first day we became friends, and it would¡¯ve been okay, Emily. But you lied to me, you¡ª¡± ¡°She didn''t lie, Ara.¡± ¡°What do you mean?¡± ¡°David erased it,¡± Jason said, offering Emily his hand; she took it and sat down across from him. ¡°Emily didn¡¯t even know.¡± ¡°You didn¡¯t know you slept with him?¡± I asked accusingly, drawing the rest of that spiteful attack back in since, continuing would make me a hypocrite. ¡°But you. . .¡± ¡°She was a virgin, yes,¡± Jason answered the question I wanted to ask. ¡°Then you were¡ª¡± ¡°Bound to him.¡± She nodded, resting her chin on her knee. ¡°I was obsessed with David, Ara, believed it was love, but¡ª¡± ¡°Then, how come you suddenly remembered? Or did David actually tell you?¡± ¡°She didn''t suddenly remember,¡± Jase said. ¡°When she came to me, the day I bit her, it¡­she was so upset. She was mad at me for what I did to you at the masquerade, but her anger went beyond caring for a friend.¡± ¡°We got in a fight about how he left me,¡± she added. ¡°And then the truth came out,¡± Jase said, ¡°that she never loved me.¡± ¡°I told him I was always in love with David¡ªthat I used Jason to get past that.¡± Page 79 ¡°Oh, Jase.¡± I cocked my head, eyes of sympathy offering him wordless condolences.Advertisement ¡°I was okay. But it didn¡¯t make a whole lot of sense¡ªfor her to be in love with David. She didn¡¯t really even like him that much.¡± He laughed when he looked at Emily, and even she managed a small smile. ¡°I read her mind¡ªsaw all the times she just wanted to whack him with a baseball bat.¡± ¡°I knew it was wrong to feel that way,¡± Em added. ¡°To hate someone so much but find yourself crying every night because they won¡¯t ever love you. I mean, every time he looked at me, I¡¯d wish he¡¯d see that I was the one for him but, inside, if I really thought about it, there was nothing I actually liked about David.¡± ¡°When I realised this, I swept her hair back and, sure enough, she was Marked,¡± Jason said. ¡°I could¡¯ve given her the memory back. I could have made her aware that this obsession was purely a spirit bind, but it would¡¯ve eventually killed her.¡± ¡°I¡¯d been admitted into psychiatric care already,¡± Emily said, her voice shaking. ¡°When I told you I¡¯d seen a counsellor over losing Jason, I lied¡ª¡± ¡°It was always about David.¡± I nodded to myself. Jason slid over to wrap his arm around me. ¡°She would¡¯ve killed herself eventually. So, I immortalised her to break the bind.¡± ¡°And that''s why you never told me the reason you bit her.¡± I looked up at him quickly. ¡°That''s why you avoided it.¡± He nodded. ¡°I always planned to tell you, though, Ara.¡± ¡°But you. . .¡± I eyed Emily¡¯s neck. ¡°You ripped her apart when you¡ª¡± ¡°I had to make it look like an attack. She wasn¡¯t conscious at the time. I wouldn¡¯t do that.¡± ¡°Oh my God.¡± I covered my lips with the very tips of my fingers. ¡°Jase, I hated you so much for turning her like that. I¡ª¡± ¡°I know.¡± He took my hand away from my mouth and kissed it. ¡°But I knew you¡¯d learn the truth eventually. It was better for you to hate me at the time than David.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°You were so fragile. You thought you needed him to survive, which¡ª¡± He laughed, looking away for a second, ¡°¡ªturns out wasn¡¯t just a psychological dependence, like I thought. It was physical.¡± ¡°Physical?¡± ¡°Yeah. You literally needed him to survive. Without his blood, Ara, you¡¯d have gotten pretty sick.¡± ¡°Oh, right.¡± I rolled my eyes at myself. ¡°So . . . does David know you remember, Em?¡± She nodded. ¡°The first memory that came back to me was . . . that night.¡± ¡°That night?¡± ¡°The night they had sex,¡± Jase said. ¡°But . . . you attacked him when you first woke as a vampire. Was that because of¡ª¡± ¡°Yep.¡± She bit her lip. ¡°I was kind of reliving it.¡± I got up on my knees and crawled a bit closer to her. ¡°Em? What did he do to you?¡± She wiped the side of her wrist down her nose, her eyes sparkling with a coat of tears. ¡°Emily, did he rape you?¡± ¡°No,¡± she said, holding a very tight breath, her whole jaw quivering. ¡°Do you want me to tell her?¡± Jason asked softly. She nodded, sniffling. ¡°Ara,¡± Jase said, ¡°come here.¡± I crawled over and snuggled into his waiting arm, then reached across and took Emily''s hand; she was so tense, her small hand wet with tears, tight and almost unwilling to be against mine. Like I was the enemy. Or maybe she was afraid I¡¯d hate her. But, right now, I only felt more love for that poor girl than I ever had before. ¡°It¡¯s okay, Em,¡± I said, shaking her hand a bit. ¡°I''m not mad at you.¡± She nodded against her knee, chewing her thumbnail. ¡°She knows that, Ara. But she just can¡¯t bear to look you in the eye.¡± I squeezed her hand again. ¡°Why? I don¡¯t understand why you¡¯re so upset if you know I¡¯m not mad with you.¡± Jason began with a sigh. ¡°She¡¯s never talked about this with anyone.¡± ¡°Except Mike,¡± she said coldly. ¡°And he hates me now.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°I¡¯m just. . .¡± She sobbed inaudibly. ¡°He thinks I¡¯m disgusting for letting it happen.¡± Jason pulled her into his chest, too, giving her a long kiss on the head, tightening his hold around me at the same time. ¡°You are not disgusting, Emily Pierce. And Mike has no right to blame you.¡± ¡°He blames her?¡± I nearly barfed the words out. ¡°He wouldn¡¯t listen when I tried to explain. He just thinks I did it because I loved David.¡± ¡°Is that not the reason?¡± I asked innocently. Her and Jase winced. ¡°It¡¯s a long story, Ara, and I guess the event doesn¡¯t really have a point of origin. It kind of all led to them having sex, but¡ª¡± ¡°The event? I¡¯m lost,¡± I said. ¡°Em had been given a hard time at school by a few of the jocks,¡± Jase explained. ¡°There was this club¡­¡± ¡°We had no choice but to be in it,¡± Emily cried. ¡°If you wanted to be a cheerleader, you had to run with the jocks.¡± I nodded in understanding. ¡°They were about sixteen at the time,¡± Jase continued. ¡°And a couple of girls started bragging about losing their virginity.¡± ¡°And, naturally, the boys wanted in.¡± Em half smiled, rolling her eyes. ¡°They came up with this lottery where they¡¯d put girls¡¯ names in a hat and draw them out.¡± ¡°And, what, you¡¯d sleep with that guy?¡± I asked. Emily nodded. ¡°Everyone did it. We . . . if any of the girls were against it, they never said anything.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because you¡¯d be labelled a frigid outcast.¡± My brows went high and I exhaled loudly. I remembered too well the lows you¡¯d stoop to to fit in at school. ¡°One day, just after I first met David, my name was drawn,¡± Emily said. ¡°To be with David?¡± I asked, nodding to myself. ¡°No,¡± she said. ¡°Brody, that big guy that always threw food.¡± My lip turned. ¡°Gross.¡± She nodded, laughing once. ¡°I went to the locker room at lunch, but Brody wasn¡¯t there yet. So, I waited. And I was so scared I just wanted to leave.¡± I pictured her there in the boys¡¯ locker room, tugging her mini cheerleading skirt down her legs, shuffling her feet, checking the clock then the door. ¡°Did he chicken out?¡± ¡°He brought friends,¡± Jason said. I stiffened. ¡°They just wanted to watch¡ªfilm it, you know?¡± Emily said, barely able to control her obvious upset. ¡°I tried to back out, so they. . .¡± ¡°They pinned her down.¡± I covered my mouth. ¡°Was David one of those guys?¡± She shook her head. ¡°He was in the club, but he never drew from the hat.¡± And I strangely felt relief. ¡°Anyway,¡± she said. ¡°I screamed and tried to fight them off. But they were too strong for me. Then, next thing I know, Brody hits the locker and your dad¡¯s there pinning him against it.¡± ¡°My dad?¡± She nodded. ¡°The boys scattered, and Mr Thompson wrapped me up in his jacket and took me to the office¡ªcalled my mom.¡± ¡°Those boys got a two-week suspension,¡± Jase said, his eyes narrowing with fury. ¡°And that was it. They weren¡¯t even forced to make an apology.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°They told the principal they were just kidding¡ªan April Fool¡¯s joke.¡± ¡°And she believed them?¡± I asked. Emily nodded. ¡°Just ¡°boys being boys¡± was what they said. But¡ª¡± ¡°But?¡± ¡°They looked at me like I was nothing,¡± Emily said. ¡°I think they thought that, because my name had been drawn, I wanted it or something, you know?¡± I could only drop my head against my fingertips, shocked but also not surprised. ¡°And that¡¯s how David and I became friends.¡± My forehead crinkled. ¡°How?¡± ¡°He ran up to me the next day at school and said that what happened wasn¡¯t fair. He said he¡¯d make sure those guys never touched me again.¡± ¡°What did he do to them?¡± Emily shrugged. ¡°But they never touched me again.¡± Jase¡¯s eyes shrunk with a knowing smile. ¡°After that, we started hanging out more, you know. He and I, we . . . well, we just kind of got along really well.¡± ¡°You mean because you ignored all his dark ways?¡± I said. ¡°Yeah, kinda.¡± Her gaze went distant. ¡°But, word had gotten out that I was frigid, and people started picking on me. Those jocks were the least of my problems then, and I was even kicked out of the cheerleading squad.¡± ¡°So, lemme get this straight.¡± I held my hand up. ¡°You nearly get raped by a bunch of boys, and you end up the outcast?¡± ¡°Yup,¡± she said. ¡°Until the night of Summer¡¯s birthday party.¡± ¡°What happened then?¡± ¡°I walked into her house, and everyone just stared at me. But . . . I always went to Summer¡¯s party. I just never even imagined I¡¯d be uninvited, you know? She was my best friend at the time.¡± I nodded, taking her hand again. ¡°One of the guys told me to get out, and David comes running up, grabs my hand and says, ¡®She¡¯s with me¡¯. And that was it. That was the last time anyone ever picked on me. On Monday, at school, Summer came up and said I was back on the team.¡± ¡°So, they thought you were going out with him?¡± ¡°No. They knew he didn¡¯t date anyone. But they knew he was ¡®okay¡¯ with me. So they kind of had to be too, but I knew they were all faking it.¡± ¡°And that¡¯s why you were so quick to jump on all the new kids.¡± I nodded to myself, thinking back to our first day. ¡°Because you didn¡¯t have any real friends left?¡± ¡°Yeah, and . . . it kind of made me latch on to David in a lot of ways, too, since he was the only one who was genuinely nice to me. Well¡ª¡± She brushed a strand of hair from her cheek. ¡°Sometimes.¡± ¡°And that¡¯s how you ended up having sex?¡± ¡°No.¡± She looked at Jason and they both smiled. ¡°David could be really horrible when he wanted. I mean, he was nice in the David-sort-of-way, but he¡¯d make me feel stupid and worthless and, for some reason, that only made me want him more.¡± I cringed along with her, knowing too well how easy it was to fall into that. ¡°Bad thing was, I didn¡¯t care what he did to hurt my feelings because, on the days he was nice, it far outweighed all the horrid things he said.¡± Page 80 ¡°She was traumatised by what those jocks nearly did to her, Ara,¡± Jason said. ¡°She had no one to talk to that even believed her, aside from David.¡±Advertisement ¡°Even my own mother didn¡¯t believe me,¡± Emily said. ¡°The only other person who did was your dad, Ara.¡± I saw my dad¡¯s face in my mind¡ªsaw the way Emily used to look at him, and it all made sense. ¡°Things weren¡¯t good for me at home,¡± she continued. ¡°I tried to go hang out with David as much as possible, but he likes his space, you know.¡± I nodded. ¡°And he had rules,¡± she said, her thoughts making her eyes distant. ¡°I broke one of those rules, and that¡¯s what started everything.¡± ¡°What rule?¡± ¡°I wasn''t allowed to tell anyone I was at his house.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Just in case he killed her,¡± Jason said. ¡°Oh.¡± Emily shivered a little, her hand tightening on mine. ¡°Anyway, one afternoon my mom got in my face about a few things, and I stormed out. She asked where I was going and, without thinking, told her I was going over to David¡¯s. But, when I got there, he was in one of his moods, as usual. And when he found out that I¡¯d told my mom where I was, he was so mad that I actually got scared. So, I left and told him I never wanted to see him again. He demanded I come back, but I didn¡¯t. Later, he showed up at my house.¡± ¡°Long story short,¡± Jason said, ¡°Emily was his little lamb¡ªthe wide-eyed innocent creature that would follow him anywhere. For her to stand up to him like that¡ª¡± Jase shook his head, exhaling. ¡°He needed the upper hand again. He needed control of her.¡± Emily shrunk a little more. ¡°He was my first, Ara. And I really¡ª¡± She closed her eyes for a second, her lips turning down so deeply her chin crinkled. ¡°Really wish I could take it all back.¡± ¡°Does he?¡± ¡°Does he what?¡± ¡°Does he regret it?¡± ¡°Why do you think he never wanted you to know?¡± Jason said. ¡°Was . . . did he ever plan to turn her?¡± I asked. ¡°Knowing she¡¯d die after being bound to him.¡± Jason shook his head. ¡°He¡¯s done this to so many girls, Ara. I¡¯ve lost count.¡± ¡°What?¡± ¡°Every time he took his biannual leave, a trail of girls were left in his wake¡ªusually committing suicide within about two months of him leaving.¡± ¡°And you were gonna be his next tragic summer romance,¡± Emily said. ¡°Lucky for you, he fell in love with you instead.¡± All the pictures of my past flitted to mind, so bright with the yellow light of the sun that every breath of summer filled me with nothing but joy, suddenly dying under the rolling cloud of revelation. But I wasn¡¯t that surprised, not after everything I¡¯d learned about him since the day we met. I¡¯d seen the signs. I knew what kind of man he was. I also knew he was remorseful. Yet it hurt so deeply that he didn¡¯t tell me any of this. And I just wanted to smack him. ¡°Why would he lie to me? I asked him directly if he¡¯d been with you. Why didn''t he just tell me the truth?¡± ¡°To be honest, Ara,¡± Jason said, ¡°he regrets it all so deeply he can¡¯t even say the words.¡± ¡°The moment he fell for you, all that human compassion he¡¯d pushed aside came rushing to the surface,¡± Emily said. ¡°And he was dead ashamed of himself. He still is.¡± David¡¯s own words rang through me then, healing a small chunk of my heart, but not enough for me to forget the lies: Love me for who I am now, not what I was then. ¡°Why is he so ashamed? Just for sleeping with you?¡± I kind of laughed. ¡°You¡¯re not that hideous, Emily.¡± She laughed too, but the smile fell away quickly and she just sat there toying with the hem of her dress. ¡°It was more because of . . . how it happened.¡± My eyes flicked unconsciously onto Jason, who bit his lip. ¡°Jase? How did it happen?¡± ¡°He¡ª¡± ¡°It¡¯s something you need to ask him,¡± Emily cut in. ¡°Em, you know he¡¯ll never tell me.¡± ¡°Then you¡¯ll never know,¡± she said, holding my gaze. Jason¡¯s green eyes stood out in my peripheral, slightly warmed with a hint of a smile he could never erase, but cold with the concern he had for me right then. I held Em¡¯s gaze as long as I could, but she wasn¡¯t backing down. Whatever David did to her, she was protecting him, and I wanted to know why. ¡°Fine?¡± I said, standing up. ¡°Don¡¯t tell me. I¡¯ll ask him.¡± ¡°Ara?¡± Jason called. ¡°Don¡¯t.¡± I heard Emily say. ¡°Just let her go.¡± ¡°But she shouldn¡¯t be near him, he might¡ª¡± I stopped listening. I just didn¡¯t care what David might do. My limbs were driven by a force much stronger than fear or curiosity; they were driven by undiluted anger¡ªyears worth of lies and betrayal all rolling into one giant ball of fury. I slept with Jase, and that was bad, yeah, but this . . . well, at least I didn¡¯t knowingly carry the lie from beginning to end. ¡°Ara?¡± Arthur called as I passed at full human speed on the stairwell. ¡°Where are you going?¡± ¡°To find David.¡± ¡°He¡¯s in his new room. Is everything all right?¡± My fists clenched tighter by my sides. ¡°No.¡± ¡°Ara, wait?¡± he called, but I didn¡¯t wait. I marched step by step to the third floor and turned the corner, seeing David by the window outside his room; he stood in casual clothes with his hands in his pockets, his troubled gaze on the yard below. The afternoon sun lit his face, making his hair glow with those golden tones I¡¯d always loved, and it just made the pain go so much deeper. He¡¯d turn and look at me, maybe hear what I had to say, but his eyes would never smile at me again. I¡¯d never see love there again. He laid something on the windowsill, looking up in shock when he saw me coming. ¡°Ara?¡± ¡°You asshole!¡± I lashed out to slap him across the face, but he spun and grabbed my wrist before contact, hooking his foot under my ankle to flip me onto the floor at his feet. ¡°What are you doing, Ara?¡± ¡°Let go of me.¡± I wriggled out of his grip. ¡°I''m so mad at you. You looked me in the eye, and you lied to me.¡± He stood back, his eyes shrinking, focusing then smiling as realisation flooded through him. ¡°Hurts, doesn''t it?¡± I hugged my knee to my chest. ¡°Yes.¡± ¡°Good. I''m glad they told you. I''m glad it¡¯s out now, and it couldn¡¯t have come at better time.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because you deserve to suffer. What I did was a long time ago. I never even knew you then, so you have no right to comment. But what you did, well¡ª¡± He shook his head. ¡°You pretty much deserve to burn in hell, you worthless little whore.¡± I looked up quickly into his icy green eyes. ¡°How can you say that to me?¡± ¡°Easy. I have absolutely no care anymore for how you feel.¡± He jammed his hands in his pockets, rocking back on his heels. ¡°It¡¯s rather liberating, really.¡± I made myself smaller. ¡°Oh, get up.¡± He dragged me to stand. ¡°Don''t sit there and wallow in it. No one¡¯s going to care.¡± I jerked my arm from his grip. ¡°That¡¯s where you¡¯re wrong. People do care about me, David. Some of them care no matter what mistakes I¡¯ve made.¡± ¡°Guess they¡¯re the fools then, aren''t they?¡± ¡°No.¡± I turned away. ¡°They¡¯re ones worthy of my love in return.¡± ¡°Didn¡¯t know that was possible,¡± he scoffed. My footsteps halted. I spun slowly around and marched back up to him. ¡°You know what? You¡¯re a jerk, and the truth is, I do have a right to be hurt about what you did to Emily¡ª¡± ¡°To Emily?¡± he cut in. ¡°You mean with Emily.¡± ¡°No. I mean to. Because I don¡¯t think it was consensual. The way she talked about it¡ª¡± ¡°What did she say?¡± He grabbed my arm. ¡°Why would you ask that?¡± I peeled his fingers off me. ¡°If it was mutual, then¡ª¡± ¡°So you think I raped her?¡± ¡°Not raped her.¡± I held his gaze. ¡°I know you, and despite you having been this monster in your past, I would never label you something horrid. But I don¡¯t believe she wanted to do it wholeheartedly. And I don¡¯t believe you cared all that much.¡± ¡°Well, I don¡¯t really care what you think.¡± He gazed out the window again, severing the conversation. ¡°It¡¯s not my opinion that matters here, David. It¡¯s the facts. You used her. You took her virginity so you could control her.¡± ¡°Perhaps I did. So what?¡± ¡°Had you told me you slept with her before we started dating, I would have been okay with it. I would have,¡± I repeated when he grunted. ¡°Had you told me you forced her so you could make her do whatever you wanted. . .¡± I took a few steps away from him. ¡°I would¡¯ve avoided you like the plague.¡± He looked up at me. ¡°You¡¯re sick,¡± I added, my lip lifting in disgust. ¡°And everything you¡¯ve done¡ªthe way you¡¯ve acted since I told you the truth about Jason and I, has only proven to me that nothing about that monster you were back then has really changed. And a part of me, David¡ª¡± I looked him in the eye for a very long moment, ¡°¡ªis glad you broke it off with me, because I can¡¯t stand to look at you now.¡± ¡°Get back here, Ara!¡± he yelled as I walked away. ¡°Ara!¡± ¡°Just leave me alone,¡± I muttered. ¡°Don¡¯t ever talk to me again.¡± ¡°No.¡± He grabbed my arm and spun me around. ¡°It doesn¡¯t end like this. You don¡¯t get to walk away and think whatever you want about me.¡± ¡°Why?¡± I tired to pull free but he wouldn''t let me. ¡°Because you want the upper hand?¡± ¡°You swore to me, Ara, that you would love me no matter what; that you would not look at the things I¡¯d done in my past and judge me¡ª¡± ¡°And you swore to love and honour me, too, David. But as soon as that love was tested, as soon as I told you one of my dark truths, you threw that in my face. You didn¡¯t even try to understand. In fact, you¡¯re going as far as to have me punished for it. But what do I get to do? How do I get to free myself from the anger I feel for the lies you told me¡ªrepeatedly? I never looked you in the eye and told you I hadn¡¯t slept with Jason. I¡ª¡± ¡°No, worse, you just kept it from me¡ª¡± ¡°I didn¡¯t keep it from you,¡± I yelled, shocking David a bit. ¡°I didn¡¯t know it¡¯d happened. And if I had, I would¡¯ve told you immediately after.¡± Page 81 ¡°No, you wouldn¡¯t. You didn¡¯t. You went to the lighthouse. You took your problems there, and you were careless. You let yourself fall, and I don¡¯t think it was an accident. I think you¡ª¡±Advertisement ¡°What? Jumped?¡± I laughed like that was ludicrous. ¡°I wouldn¡¯t have saved you, you know,¡± he said quietly, looking out the window again. ¡°If I¡¯d known then, I would have drowned you myself.¡± ¡°So, I can¡¯t comment on you sleeping with Emily, but it¡¯s okay for you to say you¡¯d kill me¡ªit¡¯s okay for you to hurt me, torture me because I had another man inside me?¡± ¡°Not just another man, Ara! My own brother¡ªsomeone I¡¯ve hated all my life. How could you? How could you stand the feel of him between your legs? How could you¡ª¡± ¡°He¡¯s not as repulsive to me as he is to you.¡± ¡°Clearly.¡± ¡°You know what?¡± I threw my hands up. ¡°What¡¯s done is done. I can¡¯t undo it, and I don¡¯t have to put up with you being an asshole to me. I did wrong. Yes. I deserve to lose my marriage. Yes. But I do not deserve to have you in my face reminding me of that mistake every day.¡± ¡°So you admit it?¡± he asked. ¡°It was a mistake.¡± ¡°God, what is your problem? Do you really think I lay awake at night reliving it like some fantasy I wish I could repeat?¡± ¡°I¡¯m not sure what you do.¡± ¡°Then you clearly don¡¯t know me very well.¡± ¡°As recent events would indicate.¡± I let the silence hang for a second. But I always let him have the last word. And it just wasn¡¯t good enough anymore. ¡°I won¡¯t be the victim, you know?¡± ¡°What¡¯s that supposed to mean?¡± ¡°It means I won¡¯t put up with you taking your anger out on me anymore.¡± ¡°No one said you had to.¡± He graced me with some eye contact then. ¡°But you can¡¯t expect me to be civil to you.¡± ¡°Actually, I can,¡± I said, for once feeling strong enough to stand up to him. ¡°You don¡¯t have to love me. Hell, you don¡¯t even have to like me, but you will respect me.¡± ¡°Well, then let me rephrase that.¡± He stepped into my territorial bubble, his height suddenly intimidating. ¡°If you think, for one second, that I¡¯m going to be anything but cruel to you, do anything but torture you for the rest of my days, you¡¯ve got a lot of learning to do. And since the only way you ever learn, Ara-Rose, is the hard way¡ª¡± He smiled malevolently. ¡°I¡¯m going to enjoy this.¡± ¡°Wow,¡± I said, taking another step back. ¡°I had no idea just how deep your darkness went. You¡¯re like a spiteful little girl. And I know it¡¯s because you¡¯re hurt.¡± I shrugged. ¡°I get that. But what you¡¯re showing me right now, David, is that you still love m¡ª¡± ¡°Love?¡± He slowly cupped both my arms and walked me back toward the wall. ¡°Is it love when a man lies awake in his bed at night, comforted by the horrid acts he could perform on a girl¡¯s body? Is it love when he finds himself standing over her with a dagger in his hand while she¡¯s sleeping? Is it love when he contemplates throwing her to a pack of rabid prisoners and watching them defile her¡ª¡± ¡°Like you did to Pepper?¡± I spat. His eyes widened, the contents of his stomach seeming to come up in his throat until he swallowed them down, gripping my arms so tight my fingers went numb. I tried to count backward in my head, to go back in time and just stop myself from saying that. I¡¯d wanted to hurt him, but the pain I saw eat his soul then just wasn¡¯t worth it. It was childish and stupid. ¡°I¡¯m sorry, David. I shouldn¡¯t have said that.¡± He was frozen, though, his fingers locked onto my arms like a cursed statue. ¡°David, please. You¡¯re hurting me.¡± My back pressed more firmly into the wall with each second passing, the plaster dipping under my weight, but he didn¡¯t back down. The anger in him was growing¡ªflashes of Pepper¡¯s suffering flickering in his thoughts for me to see. I closed my eyes, turning my head to block them out, but they were there, and they were too real: her golden hair, turned almost orange with blood, her face mashed into the dirt floor under her naked body, her eyes catching David¡¯s as the fat, dirty man pinning her down entered her, tearing her so deeply she screamed for her beloved. But he just stood there, pinned back by the guards, frozen by a veil of knowledge mixed with shock that he couldn¡¯t lift¡ªcouldn¡¯t escape long enough to find some common sense and free her. The man entered her again, but she looked away this time, ashamed, hiding her face. She knew David wouldn¡¯t help her. She didn¡¯t care that he clearly couldn''t, all she knew was that he wouldn¡¯t. And she hated him then. She dug her fingernails into the earth and just held her breath¡ªlying there and letting them punish her, crying only his name and the sobbing remnant of the word ¡®why.¡¯ As the replay stopped and the rushing of wind in my ears and the echo of her haunted screams died down, the day around me returned. I looked up at David, seeing tears in his eyes for the first time since he learned what I did to betray him. ¡°You know nothing of what Pepper suffered,¡± he said in an eerily calm voice, and let go of my arms, pulling me up off the wall just a little first. ¡°Dav¡ª¡± I started, but he walked away, ignoring me. Fear kept me where I stood, fighting the voice in my head that told me to run after him. Everything I said¡ªeverything¡ªwas the hurt in me talking. And I regretted it deeply, all of it. Especially saying I would never have loved him if I¡¯d known what he did to Emily. I didn¡¯t mean that. I felt it at the time, but I didn¡¯t really mean it. I swore then, that no matter what he did next to make me suffer, I would never stoop to that level again, never say anything I knew would kill him inside. He wasn¡¯t the monster anymore. I was. And that was all I needed to move my feet. I darted after him, blocking his path on the narrow stairwell, both my arms reaching across to either side of the railing. ¡°Stop.¡± ¡°Ara, get out of my way.¡± ¡°No. You need to listen.¡± ¡°Nothing you have to say is of any consequence to me. You wanted me to leave you alone, never talk to you again, well . . . you got your wish.¡± ¡°That¡¯s not what I want, David. I was angry. And I¡¯m so sorry for what I said about Pepper.¡± His glassy green eyes softened a little then as he saw the truth deep inside me. ¡°That will never suffice, Ara. You knew, before you said that, the extent of the damage it would do. So don¡¯t try to take it back now.¡± I crossed my hands over my heart, guilt eating it up until I couldn¡¯t feel it beat anymore. ¡°Now, get out of my way before I do something to hurt you,¡± he added. ¡°I¡¯m not afraid of you, David. I know you won¡¯t hurt me.¡± ¡°Then you know nothing about me.¡± ¡°Really?¡± I faced him as he pushed past. ¡°I know you¡¯re ashamed of what you did to Emily.¡± The vampire in him surfaced, stopping him in his tracks, changing the way he held himself. ¡°I¡¯m not ashamed, Ara.¡± ¡°I think you are.¡± He turned slowly and walked back up the stairs, stopping on the one just above me. ¡°Just tell me why you never talked about it with me, David¡ªwhy, even after I asked you, you lied.¡± ¡°Our marriage is over. You deserve no explanation from me.¡± ¡°Yes, I do.¡± ¡°No.¡± He went to walk past again. ¡°You don¡¯t.¡± I grabbed his arm. ¡°I do, David, because, despite what I¡¯ve done wrong, I married you. We shared a life together and I am the mother of your child. You do owe me an explanation.¡± ¡°Get away from me,¡± he yelled. ¡°There¡¯s nothing to explain.¡± I blocked his path again. ¡°I¡¯m not going anywhere until you answer me.¡± He frowned at me, a little surprised. ¡°You¡¯re really not going to let this go, are you?¡± I shook my head. ¡°Fine.¡± He leaned on the wall and folded his arms. ¡°I didn¡¯t tell you because, when we first met, you and Emily were already friends, and I never planned to be with you past the summer. When that changed, it was too late to tell you.¡± ¡°Why?¡± ¡°Because you¡¯d have gone crazy, Ara. You¡¯d never have trusted me after that.¡± ¡°Of course I would have, David. I would¡¯ve trusted you more knowing you would always tell me the truth¡ªeven if I didn''t like it.¡± ¡°That¡¯s bull crap, Ara. You would¡¯ve hated me¡ªleft me.¡± ¡°Are you kidding?¡± I jerked forward. ¡°David, you know me! Look at me. Look at who I am inside,¡± I said, tapping my chest. ¡°Even if you¡¯d slept with her while we were together, you know I¡¯d have found it in my heart to forgive you.¡± ¡°Huh!¡± he scoffed, looking away. ¡°David.¡± I touched his wrist and he looked back at me. ¡°You know that.¡± His folded arms dropped slowly to his sides. He couldn¡¯t deny the truth in that statement. ¡°You¡¯re right. I should''ve told you. I¡¯m sorry.¡± Those words moved in through my ears and made everything in me feel warm and kind of renewed, taking the anger and diluting it until it was nothing. ¡°I forgive you, you know.¡± ¡°You what?¡± ¡°I know you don¡¯t need my forgiveness, but . . . you and Em, it¡¯s in the past, David, and¡ª¡± ¡°Ara.¡± He stopped me. ¡°Don¡¯t say that until you know the full story.¡± I shook my head. ¡°When I decided to be with you, I accepted you then for everything you were and had been in your past. Good or bad. I can¡¯t take that back now just because I find out that you¡¯ve done something you¡¯re not proud of. You didn¡¯t rape her. You might not have been what she wanted her first to be, but I know you¡¯re good inside, David, and¡ª¡± ¡°That¡¯s just it, Ara. I¡¯m not.¡± My mouth stayed open, still shaped to my last word. ¡°She cried,¡± he started, shifting awkwardly to a new position. ¡°She said it hurt, and I just rolled her over and told her to shut up¡ªhid her face because I didn¡¯t wanna see her tears.¡± And with his words came images, ones I made up in my own mind. ¡°Did she ask you to stop?¡± He shook his head. ¡°I told her the pain was normal for the first time. But it wasn¡¯t. If I¡¯d been gentle . . . if I¡¯d. . .¡± He folded the back of his hand to his mouth. ¡°If you¡¯d been like you were with me.¡± A quick memory lit his thoughts up¡ªof he and I in my room¡ªour first time, and he smiled, shaking his head until a frown came over like a grey cloud. ¡°I hurt her, and I made her feel ashamed of herself, made her feel like she was worth nothing to anyone. And, the worst part was, Ara, I just didn¡¯t care.¡± Page 82 ¡°But you had no human compassion.¡±Advertisement ¡°No.¡± He shook his head. ¡°I didn¡¯t. Which made being friends with her after the compassion set in really hard. So hard I . . . I just wanted to forget it happened.¡± ¡°Funny, I¡¯d kinda like to forget it, too.¡± I rubbed my head as if I could erase the last hour of my life. David laughed. It was so nice to hear that laugh again. ¡°Perhaps we can all just move past it, then.¡± I lowered my hand to my side and nodded up at the king. ¡°I¡¯m not sure Mike will feel the same way.¡± Reality moved back in to this vortex we¡¯d stepped in then, and everything crappy my life had become in the last week surfaced again. David breathed out through his nose, accepting that fact and many others that had changed his life lately, too. ¡°I have to go.¡± ¡°David, wait.¡± I went to grab him, but he tugged away. ¡°Just don¡¯t, Ara. You know about Emily now, and it¡¯s very kind of you to say you forgive me, but¡­¡± He shook his head. ¡°Nothing has changed. I still hate you. I¡ª¡± ¡°Well, I need to discuss something else with you.¡± ¡°Then it had better be some royal matter.¡± ¡°It is a royal matter.¡± ¡°Then make it quick.¡± ¡°It¡¯s about the king and queen.¡± His eyes were on something other than me, but I caught the slightest glimpse of a half smile as he shook his head. ¡°Very well. What is it?¡± ¡°I just wanted you to know that . . . Jason asked me to marry him.¡± ¡°Wondered how long that would take.¡± He huffed, clearly not surprised. I let silence own the moment for a second, waiting to see if he¡¯d ask what my response was. ¡°I don¡¯t need to ask, Ara,¡± he said, stealing that thought. ¡°You¡¯re not wearing a ring. Clearly, you declined.¡± ¡°For now,¡± I said, leaving it at that. ¡°And what¡¯s that supposed to mean?¡± I toyed nervously with the key on my necklace. ¡°It means that . . . one day, I¡¯ll probably say yes.¡± ¡°One day, huh?¡± He folded his arms again. ¡°If he keeps asking, and I¡¯m still single . . . yeah.¡± ¡°Is this some kind of prompt to force me into begging you to¡ª¡± ¡°No, David, it¡¯s not.¡± I raised a hand to shut him up. ¡°I just didn¡¯t want you to hear it along the grapevine.¡± ¡°Then consider me informed.¡± He bowed, turning away. ¡°So, you don¡¯t care if I marry him?¡± I called. He stopped at the base of the stairs, eyeing a man in his peripheral until he passed out of sight. ¡°Frankly, I have no opinion. I never could stop you from doing stupid things.¡± ¡°Why would it be stupid?¡± I walked a few steps downward. ¡°If he loves me and I love him, why¡ª¡± ¡°You¡¯re right,¡± he said, throwing his hands up. ¡°Guess it makes perfect sense. I hope you¡¯re both happy.¡± ¡°That¡¯s not what I want you to say, you know?¡± ¡°Then, what, Ara?¡± He turned back to face me. ¡°Whadda you want me to say?¡± ¡°I want you to tell me not to. I want you tell me that you still love me enough that, one day, even years from now, you might forgive me for what I did.¡± He just laughed. ¡°That will never happen.¡± ¡°Why not? You forgave Arietta when she betrayed her husband¡ªwith your uncle.¡± I could see his eyes narrow as he calculated a response. But what could he say to that? ¡°Well, Arietta wasn¡¯t my wife. Had she been, she would have suffered the same fate Victor served.¡± ¡°You don¡¯t mean that,¡± I called, running after him. ¡°David, please tell me you don¡¯t mean that.¡± ¡°Ara, just back off!¡± He shoved my hand off his arm. ¡°You¡¯ve put me in a corner here. I don¡¯t want to hurt you, but if you don¡¯t leave me the hell alone, I cannot be held responsible for what I might do to you.¡± ¡°So you are angry then?¡± I refused to step back, despite his body language warning me to move. ¡°About the proposal?¡± ¡°God, when are you going learn, Ara?¡± He pushed past and headed back up the stairs. I followed. ¡°I¡¯m not leaving you alone until I get some kind of communication breakthrough with you, David. You can¡¯t just shut down and refuse to discuss things.¡± ¡°And which scroll states that law?¡± he asked, walking away almost faster than I could keep up. ¡°Not everything is about the law. Maybe it¡¯s just wrong to end a marriage and never give the other person a chance to have their say.¡± ¡°Why should I, Ara?¡± He spun back, barring me with his cold stare. ¡°You talk things through with someone when you want peace, want to sort things out. But I don¡¯t care what you have to say. Nothing will ever make me want to forgive you. Nothing will ever make what you did okay, not on any level. We can never be friends again, Ara. We can never even be in the same room without me wanting to strangle you.¡± ¡°That¡¯s not how you really feel.¡± I moved between him and the path to his room. ¡°You want to break me down emotionally, but you won¡¯t put your hands on me.¡± ¡°If you know that, Ara, if you¡¯re so sure of that, then why keep pushing me?¡± He tried to move past me again but I blocked him. ¡°Why torture me by giving me no way out of this conversation?¡± ¡°Because there¡¯s no other way I can make you talk.¡± ¡°Why would you want that? Why would you want to talk when you know how much I hate you?¡± ¡°Because I¡¯m hoping I can change your mind¡ªhoping the David I love is still in there and that you¡¯ll see I¡¯m still the girl you love, that I just made a mistake.¡± ¡°That will not ever happen, Ara,¡± he said stiffly, and for the first time, something about the way he said that made me truly believe him. ¡°So, that¡¯s just it, then?¡± ¡°Yes,¡± he said, his shoulders dropping with relief. ¡°So just leave me alone and let me get on with my life, okay?¡± ¡°Fine,¡± I said, and watched him disappear into his bedroom, wishing I¡¯d never come up here to talk with him. That brief moment where we spoke as equals would forever be the little piece of hope I held onto that prevented me from truly moving on. I knew that. We¡¯d survived torture, separation, immortality and heartbreak, but I was beginning to think maybe it was time for me to admit that we couldn¡¯t survive the damage done deeper than skin¡ªleaving the heart scarred and unidentifiable as what it once was. I wandered over to the windowsill to watch the night rising, and a glimmer of light, just a flash in the corner of my eye, caught my attention, stopping my footsteps. There, settled on the white oak sill was a tiny gold band, turning orange under the evening sun: my wedding band¡ªthe one David ripped from my finger. I picked it up and angled it to the sky, catching the first star of the evening within the golden circle. All my wishes had come true with this little gold band, and it all had come undone so easily with just one mistake. Just one night of letting my heart run free. But, although I wished I could take back the argument I had with David, I no longer wanted to take back what I did with Jase, no longer wished it hadn¡¯t happened. For the first time since I moved to my dad¡¯s and started my first day of school, I felt alive and free. I knew who I was, where I belonged in the world, and I didn¡¯t need anyone: not David, not Jase, not even my dad, to make me feel safe, or like I deserved to be here. I made mistakes, and I still had a lot of learning to do, but I was strong, and learned fast, and no matter what anyone thought of me now, I knew I deserved to be alive. And I deserved to be happy. I turned and walked away then, taking the stairs to the second floor, back to my life, leaving the past, and the ring, behind on the windowsill where David had. I wasn¡¯t sure anymore what tomorrow would bring, or if I¡¯d ever talk to him again the way we had on the stairs just now, but one thing I did know was that his absence from my life would no longer make or break me. I didn¡¯t need him anymore to know who I was. I didn¡¯t need him anymore to be okay. I was finally free. Finally, just me.